Latest / Equipped for Impact / Gaming And The Heart- Timeless Truths in a Shifting Culture (Part 3)

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Gaming And The Heart- Timeless Truths in a Shifting Culture (Part 3) · Equipped for Impact

• 0:00
  Nate: Lewis, the other day I heard a kid say, That's so mid and I instantly knew two things.
• 0:06
  Nate: Number one, I'm old.
• 0:08
  Nate: Number two, their world has its own language.
• 0:12
  Nate: Facts.
• 0:13
  Nate: Like straight facts.
• 0:14
  Nate: And the scary thing is I know what that means.
• 0:18
  Nate: You do?
• 0:19
  Nate: Mm-hmm.
• 0:19
  Nate: Because I had to go and translate it like I was reading Greek.
• 0:23
  Nate: I had to look it up online.
• 0:24
  Nate: It's it's like a badge, Nay.
• 0:26
  Luis: It's not just a word, it's a whole vibe.
• 0:29
  Luis: And gaming is one of the biggest places where that language gets formed.
• 0:34
  Nate: And that's what we're talking about today.
• 0:36
  Nate: Because for a lot of kids, gaming isn't just something they do, it's where they belong.
• 0:42
  Luis: Yeah, it's it's a community, it's identity, it's status.
• 0:45
  Luis: It becomes inside jokes, it's it's how they connect with each other after school and outside of school.
• 0:52
  Nate: And parents, here's the tension: you can't disciple what you refuse to understand.
• 0:57
  Luis: And when we say understand, we don't mean you have to become a gamer.
• 1:02
  Luis: We mean that you are present enough to shepherd the heart.
• 1:14
  Nate: Welcome to Equipped for Impact, the podcast designed to assist Christian parents, leaders, and educators to raise up the next generation to stand firm in their faith and influence the world for Christ.
• 1:26
  Nate: We're your hosts.
• 1:27
  Nate: I'm Nate.
• 1:28
  Nate: And I'm Lewis.
• 1:29
  Nate: And we're glad you're here with us today.
• 1:31
  Nate: We're in part three of our miniseries, Timeless Truths in a Shifting Culture, and we want to give you unchanging principles with real-world application.
• 1:42
  Nate: Today's episode is Play and the Heart.
• 1:45
  Nate: So we're talking all about gaming.
• 1:48
  Luis: And the goal today is not to cause you to panic.
• 1:51
  Luis: The goal is formation and we're building a biblical framework that applies to any topic, and then we're helping you apply it to specific topics in the life of your children.
• 2:02
  Nate: So, parents, as you're listening to this, um, we're gonna say some of these same things in every episode.
• 2:08
  Nate: So if you miss, like this is episode three, if you miss the first two, I would encourage you to go back and listen to those.
• 2:14
  Nate: Um, but just because you haven't listened to them doesn't mean that you're gonna be lost and in the dark.
• 2:19
  Nate: You can just pick up right here.
• 2:21
  Nate: And if you found us uh in this episode because you were looking for a gaming or a parenting episode, we'd love if you went and you hit subscribe because this is the type of thing that we put out every week just helping you guys.
• 2:33
  Nate: Um but I would encourage you, go back and download that first one where we talked about what was the first, it wasn't music.
• 2:40
  Nate: Yeah, it was music.
• 2:41
  Nate: It was the music episode, music and the heart, um, where we really spent some more time going through kind of the five principles that were baking into each of these episodes.
• 2:50
  Nate: So, Lewis, let's let's just jump right in.
• 2:52
  Nate: Remind us again, what are these five principles?
• 2:54
  Luis: So, principle one is we are always being formed.
• 2:57
  Luis: Nobody is neutral, and something is discipling your children in your home every day.
• 3:05
  Nate: That's right.
• 3:05
  Nate: And it's every day, every moment uh we're being directed.
• 3:09
  Nate: Um, and it's really our hearts, which that's principle number two.
• 3:12
  Nate: Your heart is the control center.
• 3:15
  Nate: Um, and so our hearts are being directed in a certain way, and what we love drives how we live.
• 3:21
  Luis: And that actually leads us into the third principle, which is that every cultural product carries a vision of the good life.
• 3:30
  Luis: So even a game, even a video game that you might play on your phone, that you might play on your Xbox or PlayStation, it's preaching something about what matters.
• 3:40
  Nate: Yeah, that's exactly right.
• 3:41
  Nate: It it talks you about what should be valued, what should be, you know, um pursued as uh, like you said, the vision of the good life.
• 3:50
  Nate: And that keeps coming up again and again.
• 3:53
  Nate: And so, parents, number four, discernment is a skill.
• 3:57
  Nate: Um, it's it's something that we can um we can train in in ourselves and in our children.
• 4:04
  Nate: It's not something where, you know, you're miraculously, you know, either you're born with it or you're not.
• 4:08
  Nate: It's a skill that we can uh we can develop in ourselves and our children.
• 4:13
  Nate: So we're raising wise, steady kids.
• 4:16
  Nate: That's that's the end goal.
• 4:17
  Nate: Yep.
• 4:18
  Luis: And then we want a disciple for mission, not isolation.
• 4:22
  Luis: So we're not giving you this so that you hide your children from the world.
• 4:27
  Luis: We are giving you this so that you can train your kids to live faithfully in it.
• 4:33
  Luis: Because we're just a few days removed from the Super Bowl.
• 4:37
  Luis: If you have followed social media or just TV, everybody has an opinion about the Super Bowl halftime show.
• 4:45
  Nate: So is the Super Bowl is that where they get like a really big bowl and it's like lots of salsa?
• 4:50
  Nate: It is because it's a super bowl.
• 4:51
  Luis: It's a super bowl and there's a lot of chips in it.
• 4:53
  Nate: Yes, lots of chips in the biggest.
• 4:54
  Nate: And then somebody wins.
• 4:55
  Nate: Somebody wins whoever begins and like gets to the bottom of the bowl fastest.
• 5:00
  Luis: Yeah, I think that's the one.
• 5:01
  Luis: Okay.
• 5:01
  Nate: They it's kind of like a hot dog eating bowl.
• 5:03
  Nate: And then there's a halftime show.
• 5:04
  Nate: They get halfway through the bowl and and they watch TV.
• 5:07
  Nate: And then a bad bunny decides to start singing.
• 5:09
  Nate: Is it Bugs Bunny?
• 5:11
  Nate: Um probably close.
• 5:12
  Nate: The the fact that this is only partly like me joking and partly me being serious is what cracks me up.
• 5:21
  Nate: We need to clip this.
• 5:22
  Nate: This is what we're sharing on social media.
• 5:24
  Nate: And they is clueless about the Super Bowl.
• 5:28
  Luis: You didn't watch it, did you?
• 5:29
  Luis: No, absolutely not.
• 5:30
  Luis: No.
• 5:30
  Luis: Okay.
• 5:30
  Luis: Um played who played the Super Bowl.
• 5:32
  Luis: The Seattle Seahawks and the New England Patriots.
• 5:35
  Nate: It was it was an okay game.
• 5:37
  Nate: And the Patriots lost.
• 5:38
  Nate: I did know that.
• 5:38
  Nate: Yeah, which made me happy.
• 5:39
  Nate: Did it just just because?
• 5:41
  Nate: Yeah, I'm against New England teams.
• 5:42
  Nate: Why?
• 5:43
  Nate: Yankees, Mets, Patriots, anybody in New England.
• 5:46
  Nate: Well, the Yankees and Mets aren't in New England.
• 5:48
  Nate: But it's New York.
• 5:49
  Nate: It's the same thing.
• 5:50
  Nate: But the It's all like the Northeast.
• 5:52
  Nate: Oh, so you just have an issue with the Northeast.
• 5:54
  Nate: Boston?
• 5:55
  Nate: Yeah.
• 5:56
  Nate: All of that.
• 5:56
  Nate: We're gonna have to unpack that one day.
• 5:58
  Nate: Like it whenever the Yankees and the Red Sox play, I am still trying to figure out if there's a way for both teams to lose.
• 6:04
  Luis: That's because you're a Braves fan.
• 6:05
  Luis: Absolutely.
• 6:06
  Luis: And so there's just kind of that makes sense to me.
• 6:08
  Luis: Okay.
• 6:08
  Luis: I give you that.
• 6:09
  Luis: Yep.
• 6:09
  Luis: So we've laid the foundation.
• 6:11
  Luis: Now let's talk about why gaming is such a big deal.
• 6:16
  Nate: Yeah, yeah.
• 6:16
  Nate: So let's get into this.
• 6:17
  Nate: Like, what is it that makes gaming different from from even music and movies?
• 6:23
  Nate: Because they both, like we've said, in our principles, they're they're all directing the heart and making this idea of the good life.
• 6:29
  Nate: But what is it that really uh sets gaming apart from kind of some of these other mediums of entertainment?
• 6:35
  Luis: Well, that's because gaming is participation, right?
• 6:37
  Luis: You are you're not just watching a story play out.
• 6:41
  Luis: You actually get to be inside of the story.
• 6:44
  Luis: You are you are acting as a part of the story.
• 6:47
  Luis: You're choosing, you're competing, you're spending, you're you're collaborating.
• 6:51
  Luis: And then that all is training the heart through practice.
• 6:55
  Luis: I was actually reading an interesting article recently about how video games had changed and how it's impacting the current generation versus our generation, Nate, because when we played like Super Mario World, you know, there were like there were lives, and so there were game overs and you had to save and there was if you had to reach the save point.
• 7:16
  Luis: Yes, and if you didn't, then you're you started all over.
• 7:19
  Luis: But today, in today's games, a lot of those games have infinite lives.
• 7:23
  Luis: They're there it's it's open-ended, and so there's no start and end, and there's you know, you you don't necessarily lose, you just kind of keep going.
• 7:32
  Nate: And so I think it's it's really important.
• 7:34
  Nate: Like we can park here for a minute because there's there's different categories.
• 7:39
  Nate: And again, I'm not a gamer, and I know that surprises no one.
• 7:42
  Nate: But I'm actually surprised by that.
• 7:44
  Nate: Really?
• 7:45
  Nate: I'm not a gamer at all.
• 7:46
  Nate: Okay.
• 7:46
  Nate: Um and and we do Mario Kart on the Switch, but we do not have a Switch 2.
• 7:51
  Nate: It's so it's the Mario Kart A.
• 7:53
  Nate: Switch one.
• 7:53
  Nate: Yep, the original the OG switch.
• 7:55
  Nate: So um anyway, the the the different types of games, like there's the games like you talked about where you're immersed in this story and you're acting as part of it and you're like trying to to build it out.
• 8:07
  Nate: Um but then there's and a lot of times the games that are like that also have that online component or the infinite component where there is no beginning and end, like you talked about.
• 8:18
  Nate: There's no story, and it's just I'm making my own story or I'm just playing against p and so it's just you can literally get lost in it, and there's infinite updates.
• 8:27
  Nate: Yeah.
• 8:28
  Nate: Like everything's connected to the internet now, and so it's not like you buy the game, you download it, and you play through to the end, and then you've beaten the game.
• 8:35
  Nate: Like I remember when it was a big deal that you beat Bowser and you won Super Mario.
• 8:40
  Nate: Yeah.
• 8:41
  Nate: Right.
• 8:41
  Nate: But you don't do that anymore.
• 8:43
  Nate: And so there's this just constant flow of I'm doing these things, I'm racking it up, and there's there's an infinite future in this gaming world with those games.
• 8:54
  Luis: What makes that even uh guess to another level is it's social now, right?
• 8:59
  Luis: So you have voice chat, you have squads, you have guilds, there's group text, you have somebody telling you, get on tonight, right?
• 9:06
  Luis: Let's play.
• 9:07
  Luis: And for a lot of kids, gaming becomes a friendship.
• 9:11
  Luis: Gaming becomes a social group that they belong to.
• 9:14
  Nate: Yeah, and that's a big point.
• 9:16
  Nate: Like a parent might think, oh, my kids alone in their room playing their game.
• 9:19
  Nate: Um, but in the kids' mind, they're hanging out with people.
• 9:22
  Nate: Um, they're they're connecting with their friends.
• 9:25
  Nate: Yeah.
• 9:25
  Nate: And so it is a connection point.
• 9:27
  Nate: Yeah.
• 9:28
  Nate: And it's an it's an internet connected device.
• 9:30
  Nate: Aaron Powell, Jr.
• 9:30
  Luis: And then building back off of what you were just saying, Nate, right?
• 9:33
  Luis: There's there's endless reward loops now, right?
• 9:36
  Luis: Games are built around progression, about having ranks, about getting skins or loot or achievements, right?
• 9:43
  Luis: And you're getting constant feedback, and so it trains the brain to crave that next hit, right?
• 9:49
  Nate: What actually ranks.
• 9:51
  Nate: So they've they've there's a there's another side of that too, because there's a connection between the way uh some of these games are programmed and um which I said that on purpose, right?
• 10:01
  Nate: They're they're designed by other human beings, right?
• 10:04
  Nate: So they're programmed a certain way, and they've actually built into it similar techniques to like slot machines.
• 10:10
  Nate: You think of gambling and a slot machine in a casino, you you know, you never know it's the variable rewards.
• 10:16
  Nate: You don't know what you're gonna get.
• 10:18
  Nate: So even some of these things, like they buy a pack off of this game, and it we're being general on purpose, but they buy a pack off of a game and you don't actually know what you're getting.
• 10:28
  Nate: Like it could be something that's super rare, but it could also be something that's you know pretty common.
• 10:33
  Nate: And so then they get this and it's just like, oh, I got it, that's great, or oh no, now I've got to buy something new because I really wanted this other thing.
• 10:40
  Nate: Maybe I'll get it this time.
• 10:41
  Nate: And so that's a whole nother rabbit trail you could go on of the link between some of these online games and future gambling addictions.
• 10:50
  Luis: Yeah.
• 10:50
  Luis: And so when parents hear gaming, right, they think time, but what we're actually saying here is that this is bigger than time, right?
• 10:58
  Luis: Like it's not just about the time they're spending playing the game.
• 11:02
  Luis: Time matters, but what we're really talking about and what Nate just described there is the formation, right?
• 11:09
  Luis: What's being trained in patience, having to wait for that next loot box to drop.
• 11:15
  Luis: Yep.
• 11:15
  Luis: Or anger, right?
• 11:16
  Luis: I didn't get what I wanted, so now I have to go do something to get that.
• 11:21
  Luis: Or honesty, right?
• 11:23
  Luis: Self-control desire.
• 11:24
  Nate: Yeah, that's exactly right.
• 11:26
  Nate: So so we've shared before um the Axis, you know, annual kind of recap of things that are coming up, and they've given a snapshot of different things in 2026 in their kind of culture uh pulse that they've got coming out.
• 11:40
  Nate: And they talked about the the music and the movies and the streaming and all of that, but they've got a section on gaming.
• 11:46
  Nate: So what's what's going on in gaming coming up, Lewis, since you're the gamer in the room right now?
• 11:50
  Luis: Yeah, and and by being the gamer, I play one game, Clash of Clans, currently.
• 11:55
  Luis: It's still a thing, yeah.
• 11:57
  Luis: So I'll pick it up every night and play, you know, for 10 or 15 minutes here or there.
• 12:01
  Luis: Wow.
• 12:01
  Luis: Now I I I was a big gamer growing up, and uh up until about five years ago, I used to play World of Warcraft, which is a big massive multiplayer online RPG.
• 12:12
  Luis: I don't have to be a good one.
• 12:12
  Luis: Some of you have caught that in the world of Warcraft.
• 12:14
  Luis: Wow.
• 12:15
  Luis: Yeah, look at that.
• 12:15
  Luis: Way to go.
• 12:16
  Luis: There you go.
• 12:16
  Luis: Um but one of the things that Axe has noted is the rise of oddball social games that started in 2025 and how that trend is going to continue into this year.
• 12:27
  Luis: And so they noted that there's going to be a surge in indie games.
• 12:31
  Luis: And so indie games are usually made by smaller studios, right?
• 12:36
  Luis: So like you think about your big studios, like EA Games is that makes Madden, and it's the one that makes um the NCA football game.
• 12:44
  Luis: And you think about your big studios are making the big games, but indie games are getting popularity, and so they mentioned a few to just be aware of uh Claire Obscure, Expedition 33, and Silksong.
• 12:56
  Luis: And so Expedition 33 is is is one of the ones that's really dominating the conversation.
• 13:02
  Luis: So so your kids may be playing these games or you may be hearing them talk about it.
• 13:08
  Luis: Another thing is is also the rise in in fighting games.
• 13:11
  Luis: So for those of us in our generation, we might remember like Mortal Kombat, Street Fighter.
• 13:16
  Luis: Did you ever play those games before?
• 13:17
  Luis: Absolutely not.
• 13:18
  Nate: We did uh Super Smash Bros.
• 13:19
  Nate: Okay, so so similar concept, yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 13:22
  Nate: Uh and so but now going to like Pizza Hut and having the, I think it was Mortal Kombat, like but you had like a two in the console.
• 13:29
  Luis: That was it.
• 13:30
  Luis: And so Man, I am so old.
• 13:31
  Luis: And so these fighting games are on the rise.
• 13:33
  Luis: You've got games like Riot's 2X KO, it's expanding.
• 13:37
  Luis: Uh Marvel, which is big in the superhero world, right?
• 13:40
  Luis: Is entering with a new fighting title.
• 13:43
  Luis: And then, you know, you've um it's I think it's called Marvel Token Fighting Souls, and it's gonna launch later this year.
• 13:50
  Luis: And so these are the games that are kind of dominating the conversation.
• 13:54
  Luis: And then parents, if you have younger children, you kind of have that background hum that is always there, but it's not necessarily releasing something.
• 14:05
  Luis: It's like Minecraft, right?
• 14:07
  Luis: Kids are playing Minecraft, and that's a constant, yeah.
• 14:10
  Luis: It's a constant evolution, Fortnite, right?
• 14:12
  Luis: How many of your kids are playing Fortnite?
• 14:14
  Luis: Um, how many of your kids are playing Can you do the floss?
• 14:16
  Luis: Um No.
• 14:17
  Luis: Isn't that from Fortnite?
• 14:18
  Luis: It is okay.
• 14:19
  Luis: See, I know a little bit.
• 14:20
  Luis: You know a little bit, yeah.
• 14:21
  Luis: Um Roblox is another one.
• 14:23
  Luis: Yeah, right.
• 14:23
  Luis: And those are the places that kids constantly return to because those games are social, those games are endless, those games are always updated.
• 14:31
  Luis: And so there may not be this new release coming out, but there's a constant update that's happening.
• 14:38
  Luis: And they I think you were just telling me something about Roblox.
• 14:40
  Luis: Yeah, Roblox.
• 14:41
  Nate: So all of those games, that's what we were talking about with earlier when we talked about the endless, constant things about about that, and and even the connection.
• 14:49
  Nate: Like this summer, we were at, you know, my in-laws and their community pool, and there was another, there's a we were there with our kids, and there's this other little girl, um, had to have been maybe seven, maybe.
• 15:03
  Nate: Um, and she was, you know, trying to play with my kids and whatever, and they're just you know being kind.
• 15:08
  Nate: Well, then this girl, we've never seen her before, she's visiting her grandparents, she's from out of state, and then she's like, Hey, what's your Roblox name?
• 15:16
  Nate: I want to connect so we can stay in contact after we leave.
• 15:20
  Nate: And it's like, I literally just met you.
• 15:22
  Nate: You're a seventh seven-year-old, and you're asking like you're asking my girls like what their Roblox name is so you can connect.
• 15:30
  Nate: Like, so there's like that's the type of thing that's going on in these games.
• 15:33
  Nate: Yeah.
• 15:33
  Nate: And I actually read because i especially like you think of Minecraft.
• 15:37
  Nate: I think most people are familiar with that where you go and you build stuff, yeah.
• 15:40
  Nate: Which I'm not a hundred percent, you know, knowledgeable of that.
• 15:44
  Nate: You should watch the movie.
• 15:45
  Nate: There's a movie?
• 15:46
  Nate: Minecraft the movie.
• 15:47
  Nate: Oh my goodness.
• 15:47
  Nate: See, I have no clue what's going on.
• 15:49
  Nate: There was a Super Mario movie.
• 15:50
  Nate: I think you would like the Minecraft movie.
• 15:52
  Nate: Oh my i it's too much for me.
• 15:54
  Nate: No, too much.
• 15:54
  Nate: Do they have block heads?
• 15:55
  Nate: They do.
• 15:56
  Nate: Okay.
• 15:56
  Nate: Yep.
• 15:56
  Nate: Wonderful.
• 15:57
  Nate: They do.
• 15:58
  Nate: Um, but in Roblox, the it's there's a social aspect to it where not only do you connect with people, but you can actually upload your own like mini worlds within the worlds.
• 16:08
  Nate: Yeah.
• 16:08
  Nate: And so your kids can go in and they can be playing and switching the worlds and interacting.
• 16:14
  Nate: And so there were some versions or things that had been uploaded into Roblox that were pornographic in nature.
• 16:23
  Nate: Um, there's some that labeled themselves as like therapy counselors, and you could go in and talk to people, which obviously, you know, you want to vet who your child is getting counsel from.
• 16:33
  Nate: Um, you know, so it was things like that.
• 16:35
  Nate: Um game, there was one that it was in the news about somebody had built a game where the and uploaded it to Roblox where you had to like hide a dead body, and that was your job.
• 16:45
  Nate: It was like, and that was the challenge was figure out where can where can you stash this dead body so you don't get caught.
• 16:50
  Nate: And so it's like for parents, it's not just a what game are they playing, right?
• 16:55
  Nate: But it's what world are they living in inside these bigger games.
• 17:00
  Nate: So you think, oh, Roblox like blocks, they're building, it's fun.
• 17:04
  Nate: There's a whole lot of dark rabbit trails, like rabbit holes you can get down in these.
• 17:09
  Nate: So even with parental controls turned on, um, there's a lot of stuff you've got to be aware of for your children.
• 17:15
  Luis: Yep.
• 17:16
  Luis: And so you hear Minecraft Fortnite Roblox and you're like, oh, those games are innocent.
• 17:20
  Luis: They're, you know, they're and and so we kind of set them to the side because we focus on like the big one that's coming out this year, which is Grand Theft Auto, right?
• 17:30
  Luis: And so like that's one of those games that has notoriously carried that M rating.
• 17:34
  Luis: Yeah.
• 17:34
  Luis: And so parents are like And parents know, and they're like, oh yeah, we're gonna lock that down.
• 17:38
  Luis: Roblox, that's fine.
• 17:39
  Luis: Yep, yep.
• 17:39
  Luis: So we're not gonna let you play Grand Theft Auto 6, right?
• 17:42
  Luis: But you can play Fortnite, you can play Roblox, you can play Minecraft, and those games are safe.
• 17:47
  Luis: The truth is it's not, right?
• 17:49
  Luis: Your kids are being formed and disciple.
• 17:52
  Luis: And so parents, uh, you don't have to pretend that this doesn't exist because if your child never plays these games, it still becomes cultural noise, right?
• 18:02
  Luis: They're gonna see clips, they're gonna see memes, their friends are gonna be talking about it.
• 18:07
  Luis: So you may make a decision, no way is my kid gonna play Grand Theft Auto.
• 18:11
  Luis: But I guarantee you that some of their friends are playing it.
• 18:15
  Luis: Their friends are talking about it.
• 18:17
  Nate: Yep.
• 18:17
  Nate: Yep.
• 18:18
  Nate: So let's kind of bring this down because we just threw a lot of stuff at you, and honestly, my eyes kind of glazed over a little bit as we were listing all these different names of games and all that stuff.
• 18:27
  Nate: But let's just kind of anchor this in some some reality and some statistics.
• 18:31
  Nate: Like how common is this for for teenagers, Louis?
• 18:35
  Luis: So eight out of ten, um almost really nine out of ten, eighty-five percent of US teens play video games, and about four in ten are playing daily.
• 18:46
  Nate: Wow.
• 18:46
  Nate: So basically everybody.
• 18:47
  Nate: Yeah.
• 18:48
  Nate: When a friend says everybody's playing this game, they're not exaggerating that much.
• 18:52
  Luis: Yep, yep.
• 18:53
  Luis: And so then the Pew Research Center found that 89% are playing online or in person with another person.
• 19:00
  Luis: So they're not playing by themselves.
• 19:02
  Nate: Aaron Ross Powell Again, that's the it's a social connection point, right?
• 19:05
  Nate: It's not like we grew up, I'm playing Super Mario in my room.
• 19:09
  Nate: It's which we didn't have it in the room.
• 19:11
  Nate: More on that later.
• 19:12
  Nate: But but they're really they're connecting their being with other people.
• 19:16
  Nate: Yep.
• 19:16
  Nate: So that's why we want to shepherd our children.
• 19:20
  Nate: We don't want to ignore it.
• 19:21
  Nate: We also don't want to overreact.
• 19:22
  Nate: So let's kind of give you those five questions that we've used in all of these episodes, but apply them to gaming.
• 19:30
  Nate: Lewis, walk us through these five questions.
• 19:32
  Nate: Yeah.
• 19:32
  Luis: So the first one is what does this game celebrate, right?
• 19:34
  Luis: We're talking about skill, teamwork, creativity, domination, chaos, revenge, greed, right?
• 19:41
  Luis: Like what is this game celebrating?
• 19:44
  Luis: Uh the second one is what does it call normal or desirable, right?
• 19:49
  Luis: So is it normalizing violence?
• 19:52
  Luis: Is it normalizing disrespect?
• 19:54
  Luis: Is it making deception or sexual content or crude speech desirable, right?
• 20:00
  Luis: Are we normalizing stealing or revenge?
• 20:04
  Luis: And then Nate, to your point, right, about the heart, right?
• 20:07
  Luis: Yeah.
• 20:07
  Luis: What is it training the heart to crave, right?
• 20:11
  Luis: Are you is it teaching kids to look for approval, for control, for competition?
• 20:16
  Luis: The fourth question is what fruit does it produce in attitude and actions, right?
• 20:21
  Luis: More patience or less?
• 20:23
  Luis: More honesty or more deception, more irritability, right?
• 20:28
  Luis: Like That's a big one.
• 20:29
  Luis: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 20:30
  Nate: Like that's one of the things on the list.
• 20:31
  Nate: If you look at like psychologists, I think it's the the APA, kind of released a list and they called again, I'm gonna butcher the name, but it was like obsessive gaming disorder or something like that.
• 20:42
  Nate: And that was one of the symptoms was just general overbearing irritability.
• 20:47
  Luis: Because of the games, right?
• 20:47
  Luis: Because of the games.
• 20:48
  Luis: That's incredible, yeah.
• 20:49
  Luis: Um and then the fifth question is how should we respond as Christians with conviction and charity, right?
• 20:55
  Luis: So we don't need to be harsh, but we also don't need to be passive.
• 20:59
  Luis: Right.
• 21:00
  Luis: We need to be clear and we need to be loving.
• 21:03
  Luis: And then this takes us to what this actually looks like in the home.
• 21:07
  Luis: So Nate, why don't you take what we've just talked about and apply it to the home?
• 21:10
  Nate: Yeah.
• 21:11
  Nate: So let's let's apply this in like actually how will it work in your house, in your real homes, give you some practices because we want to give you some practical takeaways.
• 21:20
  Nate: So here's the first thing put gaming in the light.
• 21:23
  Nate: We've said this before, you know, your children should not have screens in their bedrooms.
• 21:28
  Nate: Yeah.
• 21:28
  Nate: Like that's just a general thing, whether it's phones, laptops, computers, anything, gaming systems is going to be on that list too.
• 21:35
  Nate: So, parents, sit down for 10 minutes, you know, ask your kids, show me what you do, what do you like about it, um, you know, those types of questions.
• 21:45
  Nate: Um, and then also make sure it happens in a public space.
• 21:49
  Nate: Yeah.
• 21:49
  Nate: So that all the gaming moving forward is happening in a place where kids can at least see that they are being seen, if that makes sense.
• 21:57
  Luis: And that's going to get you credibility, right?
• 21:59
  Luis: Because you're not Guessing about the games anymore.
• 22:01
  Luis: There's yeah.
• 22:02
  Luis: There's no way that as a parent that you can figure out what a game is until you've experienced it.
• 22:08
  Nate: You say, I hate that you're always playing those games, and you're like, you don't even know.
• 22:11
  Nate: It's like, well, show me.
• 22:12
  Nate: Um, you know, let's do it in the room or in the in the living room so we can all see what's going on.
• 22:18
  Nate: Uh the second thing we would encourage you is to decide on your rhythm before there's conflict, right?
• 22:25
  Nate: Um set a schedule when everybody's calm, everybody's, you know, talking, it's in a conversation together, it's not in the heat of the moment when they want to keep playing and you want them to stop.
• 22:37
  Nate: You know, sit down and say, when are you gonna be okay with gaming?
• 22:42
  Nate: Like we in our family, we I told you we played Mario Kart.
• 22:46
  Nate: That's about the only game we play.
• 22:47
  Nate: But we typically will only do that on the weekends, right?
• 22:50
  Nate: It's a school night, we're not gonna game.
• 22:52
  Nate: And like the kids know that.
• 22:54
  Nate: And so it's not a it's they might not be happy about it if they ask on a Thursday night, but it's a school night, yeah, we're not gonna game.
• 23:00
  Nate: You know, so things like that.
• 23:02
  Nate: You don't have to follow that schedule.
• 23:04
  Nate: Um, but things like homework first, you know, you protect bedtime, you protect mealtime as a family, um, those things set it ahead of time.
• 23:13
  Luis: And that's gonna become easier to enforce, right?
• 23:15
  Luis: Yeah.
• 23:16
  Luis: When you agree on than when you just kind of invent it in the moment.
• 23:21
  Nate: Yep, yep.
• 23:22
  Nate: And the the third thing is um add a heart check rule, right?
• 23:26
  Nate: Um if a game consistently produces anger, disrespect, lying, deception, those things that we talked about, then we don't just call it a game, right?
• 23:34
  Nate: Um it's a discipleship issue, and you need to teach your children to notice those patterns, right?
• 23:41
  Nate: Um you're you're gonna add in that heart check.
• 23:43
  Nate: And the question can even just be like, how is this game making you feel right now?
• 23:47
  Luis: Yeah, and that's that's really good because now you're teaching them a maturity skill.
• 23:51
  Luis: Like you're helping your child see like this this is not good for me.
• 23:55
  Luis: Like I shouldn't be acting this way about a video game.
• 23:59
  Nate: And even if they don't admit it in the moment, after some time, and if you consistently are asking that, how is this game making you feel right now?
• 24:07
  Nate: They realize, like you you realize, think of it as a any diet, you know?
• 24:11
  Nate: If I'm gonna eat this food and it makes me feel terrible afterwards, I'm gonna stop eating that food, you know?
• 24:17
  Nate: Um, and and it's just gonna be natural if you're paying attention.
• 24:20
  Nate: It's some self-awareness.
• 24:21
  Nate: Um so the last thing, replace, don't just remove, right?
• 24:26
  Nate: If you take something away, the kid feels punished, right?
• 24:29
  Nate: But if you replace it with better activities, better play, right?
• 24:32
  Nate: Going outside, board games, family time, creative projects.
• 24:36
  Nate: We love books around here.
• 24:37
  Nate: So reading, um, things like that, uh, really connecting with friends, um, you real the kids will recognize that you're not just trying to take away their fun, you're trying to, you know, enrich their lives with better options.
• 24:51
  Luis: That's really good.
• 24:52
  Luis: Now, parents, we let's talk about online play because that's a component to video games.
• 24:57
  Luis: And we didn't really dive into it much, but but we want to make sure that before we wrap this section up, that we talk about some of the guardrails that need to happen in online gaming, right?
• 25:08
  Nate: Because number one, online gaming, don't do it.
• 25:11
  Nate: Number two, online gaming, don't do it.
• 25:13
  Nate: Don't do it.
• 25:14
  Nate: Do I have to go through all four?
• 25:16
  Luis: Uh yeah.
• 25:16
  Nate: Okay, number four, online gaming, three, don't do it.
• 25:19
  Nate: Number three is is also the same.
• 25:21
  Nate: Don't do it.
• 25:22
  Nate: No, I'm I'm joking here only slightly.
• 25:24
  Nate: But yeah, I I think it's good, especially with the online, to have, like we said, those guardrails pre-planned ahead of time.
• 25:30
  Luis: And so here are four things to consider when it comes to online gaming that are clear and I think they can work in most homes, right?
• 25:39
  Luis: Number one is no private chat with strangers.
• 25:42
  Luis: Man, like you watch the news, you read the news, how many kids are getting entrapped through predatory behavior through online gaming?
• 25:51
  Luis: I mean, just here in North Carolina within the last year, there were two girls that were kidnapped by men they met online in an online game.
• 26:00
  Nate: That drives me crazy that that even exists.
• 26:02
  Nate: Absolutely.
• 26:03
  Luis: Number two, and that that's I mean, that's why Nate is saying don't do it, right?
• 26:06
  Luis: Don't do it.
• 26:06
  Luis: Because you're opening yourself up.
• 26:08
  Luis: But but if you're going to do it, no private chat with strangers.
• 26:11
  Luis: Number two is mic rules, right?
• 26:13
  Luis: If you cannot speak it in a way that honors Christ, the mic goes off.
• 26:17
  Luis: Kids talk differently online than they do in person, right?
• 26:23
  Luis: People do, parents do, right?
• 26:25
  Luis: Yeah.
• 26:25
  Luis: That's why we have keyboard warriors, right?
• 26:27
  Luis: Yeah.
• 26:28
  Luis: But we also have mic warriors where they're saying things or they're talking junk, they're insulting each other through a mic.
• 26:35
  Luis: But if they can't speak it in a way that honors Christ, then the mic goes off.
• 26:38
  Luis: Number three, friendless approval, right?
• 26:41
  Luis: Parents, you need to see it.
• 26:43
  Luis: Who are they allowed to play with games online, right?
• 26:48
  Luis: Because if you wouldn't let them play with them on a playground because you're concerned about their behavior, their language, their their values may be different in your family, then why are you gonna let them do it online?
• 27:00
  Luis: Because it's a video game.
• 27:01
  Nate: And then that you're gonna have to like dig on those.
• 27:05
  Nate: Because they're gonna be usernames that are probably not the kids' real name.
• 27:08
  Nate: Like you ask them, who is you know Bad Bunny2123?
• 27:13
  Nate: Who is that?
• 27:14
  Nate: I don't know.
• 27:15
  Nate: Okay, but if that's your username, let us know.
• 27:17
  Nate: Yeah.
• 27:17
  Nate: Podcast at wingchristian.org.
• 27:19
  Nate: Mine is Luke Classic85.
• 27:21
  Nate: Is it really?
• 27:22
  Nate: On every platform?
• 27:23
  Nate: Uh just about.
• 27:23
  Nate: If I can get it.
• 27:24
  Nate: Yeah.
• 27:24
  Nate: Do you know what my username is?
• 27:26
  Nate: Uh, don't use it.
• 27:27
  Luis: No.
• 27:30
  Luis: All right, keep going here.
• 27:31
  Luis: What's what's the last the last thing?
• 27:33
  Luis: Uh common area of play, right?
• 27:35
  Luis: Nate talked about this, right?
• 27:37
  Luis: Um, when possible, keep gaming visible.
• 27:40
  Luis: Like, don't don't let them do it in a private bedroom where you don't see what they're doing, you don't hear what they're saying, you don't interact with them.
• 27:50
  Nate: Yep.
• 27:50
  Luis: And this isn't paranoia, but this is being a parent.
• 27:54
  Luis: This is shepherding their hearts, this is supervising them because we love them.
• 28:00
  Luis: That's exactly right.
• 28:00
  Nate: And because kids are still learning wisdom.
• 28:02
  Nate: Yep.
• 28:03
  Nate: So if you take like these things we've given you, we've given you the principles, we've given you the questions, we've given you some practical takeaways, those will go a long way in shepherding and protecting your children and and teaching them that discernment, right?
• 28:17
  Nate: Because that's the ultimate goal.
• 28:18
  Nate: I like what you said, Lewis, about the maturity that we're developing, that skill in their lives.
• 28:24
  Nate: Uh so this has been, you know, episode three in our Timeless Truths um miniseries.
• 28:30
  Nate: But Lewis, before we wrap it up here, what what last like encouragement would you give to parents in this area of gaming?
• 28:37
  Nate: Parents, you don't have to master every game.
• 28:40
  Luis: You can't.
• 28:41
  Luis: It's just, it's impossible, right?
• 28:43
  Luis: But you just need to shepherd their heart with calm conviction.
• 28:48
  Luis: That's what God calls us to.
• 28:49
  Nate: Yep, that's exactly right.
• 28:52
  Nate: So thank you all for listening to Equipped for Impact.
• 28:55
  Nate: If this episode encouraged you, please share it with another gaming parent uh who could use this resource and these questions and um, you know, the practical takeaways.
• 29:04
  Nate: Be sure to subscribe so you don't miss our next episode, which is relationships and the heart.
• 29:10
  Nate: We're going right into friendships, dating, influence, identity, and what it means to love people faithfully in a confused world.
• 29:18
  Nate: Until then, keep leading the next generation to stand firm in their faith and influence the world for Christ.