Latest / Life Will Be the Death of Me with Chelsea Handler / Boomer Apologist with Iliza Shlesin…ger

Transcript

Boomer Apologist with Iliza Shlesin…ger · Life Will Be the Death of Me with Chelsea Handler

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Hello, Hello, who's there?
• 0:02
  Speaker 2: Hi?
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: Chelsea?
• 0:03
  Speaker 3: Am I speaking to a number one New York Times
• 0:05
  Speaker 3: bestselling author?
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: Yes you are?
• 0:07
  Speaker 4: Yes, you are six six times over number one New
• 0:11
  Speaker 4: York Times bestselling author The Phone Call.
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: I will never get tired of getting in my entire life.
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: I can't believe it.
• 0:18
  Speaker 4: Oh my really didn't think I was going to be
• 0:20
  Speaker 4: number one this time. I don't know where I got
• 0:22
  Speaker 4: that in my head, but I really didn't. I just thought, oh,
• 0:25
  Speaker 4: it doesn't matter what number I am. I'll be grateful
• 0:27
  Speaker 4: to be on the list. And I'm with number one.
• 0:29
  Speaker 4: And then I thought, oh my god, it happened again.
• 0:33
  Speaker 4: This is my seventh book and my sixth number one
• 0:36
  Speaker 4: New York Times bestseller. Hell, yes, so Yes, hard work
• 0:41
  Speaker 4: pays off, that's the truth.
• 0:44
  Speaker 3: Yes, and you have been working hard. You've been making
• 0:46
  Speaker 3: the rounds. You're everywhere right now.
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: And it's really exciting to see. I'm currently in south
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: By Southwest. I'm in Austin, not south By Southwest.
• 0:54
  Speaker 4: I feel like someone drugged me three days ago because
• 0:56
  Speaker 4: my head is so unclear.
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: I'm not sure what happened yesterday. I didn't even have
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: a drink.
• 1:01
  Speaker 4: I had four panels and I still feel like someone
• 1:04
  Speaker 4: drugged me. So I'm like, what is Maybe I did
• 1:06
  Speaker 4: drug me and forgot.
• 1:07
  Speaker 3: I was gonna say, if anyone drugged you, the most
• 1:09
  Speaker 3: likely culprit is you.
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: This is true, This is true.
• 1:15
  Speaker 3: Well, congratulations is so exciting and I'm so happy for you.
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: Thank you, thank you, thank you.
• 1:21
  Speaker 4: Everybody who's listening. I hope you've ordered my book or
• 1:23
  Speaker 4: you ordered it downloaded an audible or whatever. But yet
• 1:27
  Speaker 4: I'll have what she's having because it's going around, and
• 1:30
  Speaker 4: I have my European dates up. All of my European
• 1:33
  Speaker 4: dates are officially up now and for sale on Chelsea
• 1:36
  Speaker 4: Himler dot com. And I'll be in Vegas March twenty
• 1:39
  Speaker 4: first for a live new Brand news stand up show
• 1:42
  Speaker 4: March twenty first and April nineteenth, or my next.
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: Two Vegas states for our fans.
• 1:47
  Speaker 3: Well, I'm so excited. Our guest today, she is so fantastic.
• 1:51
  Speaker 4: Oh yes, this is a comedian, so you're in for
• 1:54
  Speaker 4: a good treat and conversation and a female comedian, someone
• 1:57
  Speaker 4: who I have known for years, but I've never really
• 2:00
  Speaker 4: oh no, I used to have her on Chelsea Lately
• 2:02
  Speaker 4: all the time, but I haven't seen her in years Anyway,
• 2:04
  Speaker 4: she's hilarious and her name is actually pronounced Eliza Schlessendurr
• 2:10
  Speaker 4: schlessing gurr. Fuck, it's Eliza Schlessing Gurr. So and she
• 2:18
  Speaker 4: has a new special aut So everybody please go and
• 2:20
  Speaker 4: watch that. You got to support female comedy guys and girls,
• 2:24
  Speaker 4: and you've got to see these pants, and you've got
• 2:26
  Speaker 4: to see these pants. Please welcome Eliza's lesson.
• 2:28
  Speaker 5: Gerr.
• 2:29
  Speaker 2: I have a rule about hot food on a plane. Yeah,
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: you can't bring hot food. I hear that because everybody
• 2:35
  Speaker 2: can smell.
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: It, right herbled eggs is a cold food, you know what.
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: It's just visually gross, but I guess they don't smell.
• 2:42
  Speaker 6: It's not like sulfur. But it is the idea of
• 2:44
  Speaker 6: it as.
• 2:44
  Speaker 5: Great should be more than just It shouldn't just be
• 2:47
  Speaker 5: hot food. It should there's there should be a list
• 2:49
  Speaker 5: of things that are not tenable for a flight, you
• 2:52
  Speaker 5: know what I mean? Because hardboiled eggs perfect example of
• 2:55
  Speaker 5: those could be fine in a container, in a ziplock container,
• 2:58
  Speaker 5: but as soon as you open the seal, then everyone
• 3:00
  Speaker 5: as exposed to that, so you need to swallow those
• 3:02
  Speaker 5: whole or like.
• 3:03
  Speaker 2: The Yeah, Mario two, is that gonna vibe with anyone
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: who listens to this member the egg creature that.
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: Would set off the eggs. Okay, I missed that game.
• 3:11
  Speaker 5: And remember when times were so simple that you could
• 3:13
  Speaker 5: play Super Mario Brothers. I used to get up at
• 3:16
  Speaker 5: my friend's sleepovers. We would be like ten eleven years old.
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: And I would set my alarm.
• 3:21
  Speaker 5: I don't know why I was traveling with an alarm,
• 3:23
  Speaker 5: but I would get up orly. I got set so
• 3:26
  Speaker 5: that I could get on the Maria Super Mario Brothers
• 3:28
  Speaker 5: before the other girls at the sleepover woke up.
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: Because it's like, no, no, no, I'm already on. You can't
• 3:32
  Speaker 1: push me off. I was not a schedule. So obsessed.
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: I miss being that obsessed with something.
• 3:36
  Speaker 2: Oh I feel like we are obsessed and we don't
• 3:40
  Speaker 2: realize it.
• 3:40
  Speaker 6: Like now it's just called an addiction.
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: Of the phone. You mean, oh yeah, social media.
• 3:44
  Speaker 6: I have to take it off. I have to take
• 3:46
  Speaker 6: it off every day and put.
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: It back on. Where do you take it off of?
• 3:49
  Speaker 2: I take it off my phone, and then I might
• 3:52
  Speaker 2: take it off of your phone, take it off Instagram,
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: and then I have to do this walk of shame
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: where I scroll back to find the password that my
• 3:58
  Speaker 2: social media manager keeps for me. But rather than ask her,
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: I just have it stored to like I'm lying to her,
• 4:02
  Speaker 2: Like it's somewhere in my phone and I just go
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: and I get it and I just erase it every night.
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: And sounds like you're lying to her and to yourself.
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: I am, this isrloss.
• 4:13
  Speaker 5: You're so that makes me want to have a coffee.
• 4:15
  Speaker 5: And I don't even drink coffee.
• 4:18
  Speaker 7: Snack.
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: I'm not gonna have a snack with that little cookie. Yeah,
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: I like that. So we're at a nice hotel somewhere far,
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: far away. I would love a coffee. Thank you. Okay.
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: First of all, Eliza Selessinger is here.
• 4:31
  Speaker 5: She has a new special out which is fucking funny
• 4:33
  Speaker 5: as shit. It's called a Different Animal. Are you the
• 4:37
  Speaker 5: animal or is the special the animal?
• 4:39
  Speaker 1: Both?
• 4:40
  Speaker 2: I'm the I was just I'm it's different. I think
• 4:42
  Speaker 2: I'm different. I think I wanted to create something different.
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: I have to say.
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: First of all, your house is so beautiful, and everyone
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: knows you have so much money.
• 4:49
  Speaker 1: Well why does everyone think I have so much money?
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: I don't understand where the archways.
• 4:54
  Speaker 6: It would never occur to me to redo the arch
• 4:56
  Speaker 6: like doorways.
• 4:57
  Speaker 2: I walked in and you're like, I watched your special
• 4:59
  Speaker 2: and then for a second I was like, oh no,
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: she saw an old one, and like she thinks it's
• 5:02
  Speaker 2: the new one. Someone sent you a link, which is
• 5:05
  Speaker 2: like peak Hollywood Elite. No other podcast had a link.
• 5:10
  Speaker 6: And I'm like, yeah, because you have people that get
• 5:12
  Speaker 6: the links.
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: That is so funny. I mean, you got to sneak.
• 5:15
  Speaker 6: Nobody has seen this and so I'm blown away, well.
• 5:18
  Speaker 5: As the first person that's officially seen this special. Besides,
• 5:21
  Speaker 5: I'm assuming you or maybe you haven't even seen it
• 5:23
  Speaker 5: yet because you don't even have the link.
• 5:25
  Speaker 1: I can forward you the link if you want.
• 5:28
  Speaker 5: I want to say, Ay, you're very prolific as a
• 5:31
  Speaker 5: stand up. This is your seven stand up special. This
• 5:33
  Speaker 5: one is on Amazon Prime. Everybody and Amazon and Hulu
• 5:36
  Speaker 5: are getting into stand up special so like those are
• 5:38
  Speaker 5: good places to watch them too, And everyone now has
• 5:41
  Speaker 5: Amazon Prime. I'm assuming I guess not as many people
• 5:43
  Speaker 5: as Netflix, but it is prevalent and pervasive. I say
• 5:48
  Speaker 5: that is pervasive. Amazon itself is pervasive. But you have
• 5:52
  Speaker 5: such a talent. Thank you, you really do. You really have
• 5:56
  Speaker 5: a great My stand up is very much storytelling, and
• 5:59
  Speaker 5: you know personal story. You have a very clear talent
• 6:02
  Speaker 5: of structuring jokes, premises, punchlines.
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: Would you even talk about in the special?
• 6:07
  Speaker 5: You mentioned in the special, But I love your focus
• 6:09
  Speaker 5: on the different generations about millennials because I don't even
• 6:13
  Speaker 5: know what am?
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: What am I?
• 6:14
  Speaker 5: Your generation x x X Okay, so it goes from
• 6:17
  Speaker 5: generation X then millennial.
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: I hoping i'd say gen Z.
• 6:20
  Speaker 5: I hope not Noo. Yeah, fucking annoying gen Z. So
• 6:24
  Speaker 5: then gen X No, I'm goes.
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: It goes well if you go youngest to whatever, it's alpha,
• 6:29
  Speaker 2: which is what my child is or will be gen
• 6:32
  Speaker 2: Z millennial millennial or xennial millennial, elder millennial, which is
• 6:39
  Speaker 2: what I am Generation X baby boomer, silent generation, and
• 6:45
  Speaker 2: then our forefathers.
• 6:46
  Speaker 5: Okay, so I just know that I'm not a boomer,
• 6:48
  Speaker 5: so I'm the generation after the boomer, Okay.
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: I really I mean.
• 6:52
  Speaker 5: And also when you look up generations, it's like sometimes
• 6:54
  Speaker 5: they say, oh, eleven to fifteen years and then sometimes
• 6:57
  Speaker 5: it's a decade, and it's there's different definitions of it all.
• 7:01
  Speaker 5: But never mind that you and your special, you really
• 7:05
  Speaker 5: delineate what the differences are between all of these with
• 7:09
  Speaker 5: a lot of attitude and anger towards towards younger generations
• 7:13
  Speaker 5: from not.
• 7:14
  Speaker 6: Working title attitude and anger, a lot.
• 7:17
  Speaker 5: Picking up the baton after you guys, After millennials just
• 7:20
  Speaker 5: like laid out everything for future generations, They're just like, wait,
• 7:25
  Speaker 5: what what do we do?
• 7:26
  Speaker 1: The first of all, I would.
• 7:27
  Speaker 5: Just like to go on the record and say boomers
• 7:29
  Speaker 5: are the worst ones because they ruined our planet and
• 7:31
  Speaker 5: they they did they well they did now they had
• 7:35
  Speaker 5: a lot of baby.
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: Can I say something apologists? Not of them were apologists.
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: She's an elder millennial boomer apologist. I have to say.
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: There's this thing I wrote about this in my book,
• 7:47
  Speaker 2: like when you accuse a generation of something like what
• 7:51
  Speaker 2: are we expecting that boomers are going to collectively come
• 7:53
  Speaker 2: together and be like we're so sorry when we all
• 7:56
  Speaker 2: have those Amazon accounts, like we all postmate stuff, we
• 7:59
  Speaker 2: all order stuff from overnight. So while they may have
• 8:01
  Speaker 2: laid the groundwork in terms of like disruptive oil practices
• 8:04
  Speaker 2: and stuff like that, like we contribute to it with
• 8:07
  Speaker 2: every frivolous purchase, with every sheen hall, boomers didn't invent that.
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: So they laid the groundwork but the.
• 8:12
  Speaker 2: Perpetuation of it is definitely on all of our shoulders,
• 8:16
  Speaker 2: especially generation Zee.
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: What is a sheene hall.
• 8:19
  Speaker 2: A sheene hall is where you buy a bunch of
• 8:22
  Speaker 2: clothes from Sheen from like fast fashion, and then you
• 8:25
  Speaker 2: try them all on and then you kind of throw
• 8:27
  Speaker 2: them away, but they were gonna dissolve anyway, and that
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: like rose to popularity in the pandemic, so you'd get
• 8:33
  Speaker 2: people that weren't really mindful, didn't really I guess we're
• 8:36
  Speaker 2: ignorant too. Fast fashion and that like Sheen and H
• 8:39
  Speaker 2: and M are like the number one pollutants of fast
• 8:41
  Speaker 2: fashion on this planet. So you would just order like
• 8:44
  Speaker 2: fifty pieces of clothes for like a dollar, and you'd
• 8:46
  Speaker 2: try them all on and then maybe you throw them away,
• 8:49
  Speaker 2: you know, or something like that.
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: And so that's that's what a sheen hall is.
• 8:52
  Speaker 8: Okay.
• 8:53
  Speaker 5: I thought you were going to say, then you return
• 8:54
  Speaker 5: everything because you don't want it.
• 8:56
  Speaker 2: No, some would say that's even worse for the planet,
• 8:58
  Speaker 2: because then it's going back on.
• 8:59
  Speaker 5: Anyone who doing that isn't caring about it, doesn't care
• 9:01
  Speaker 5: about the planet. Anybody's ordering a bunch of clothes, trying
• 9:03
  Speaker 5: them on and returning them is.
• 9:04
  Speaker 2: Not or keeping them and they go nowhere or you
• 9:07
  Speaker 2: donate them, but nobody wants them so cheap.
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: Every podcast I.
• 9:11
  Speaker 6: Do, like I come back to like sustainability, and people
• 9:13
  Speaker 6: just like.
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: Turn it off, go back to Justin Belgone.
• 9:16
  Speaker 5: It's like that October seventh, let's talk about Oh yeah,
• 9:19
  Speaker 5: that's the last time we saw each other right after
• 9:20
  Speaker 5: the at a jew event right after October seventh.
• 9:23
  Speaker 1: Okay, but can I can? I?
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: You came. I invited you. I put on a benefit
• 9:27
  Speaker 2: and they were like, who.
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: Else can we invite?
• 9:29
  Speaker 2: And I was like, I have Chelsea Handler's email and
• 9:31
  Speaker 2: I don't think she knows I have it. And I
• 9:33
  Speaker 2: emailed you and you wrote back and you came, and
• 9:37
  Speaker 2: that like elevated the event, like I tried to already,
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: like we had tried to have some cool people there,
• 9:41
  Speaker 2: but like we don't know each other that well.
• 9:43
  Speaker 6: And the fact that you were like, yeah, I'll be there,
• 9:45
  Speaker 6: I was just.
• 9:46
  Speaker 2: Like that was such a cool moment where you definitely
• 9:49
  Speaker 2: did not have to answer that email and you definitely
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: did not have to show up, and like I felt
• 9:54
  Speaker 2: like anointed into like a cool comedian hall of fame.
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: That's just you and I well, I'm glad I went.
• 9:59
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I went, I'm glad you came to Okay, So
• 10:02
  Speaker 5: I don't want you to have to talk about sustainability,
• 10:04
  Speaker 5: but we can talk about shower sex. Let's talk about
• 10:06
  Speaker 5: schower sex. Let's talk about I want to know who
• 10:09
  Speaker 5: is having chower sex. This is a topic that Eliza
• 10:11
  Speaker 5: covers in her special in a hilarious way, and it's
• 10:15
  Speaker 5: kind of a you know, kind of calling out all
• 10:18
  Speaker 5: men who are stupid enough to believe. I don't care
• 10:22
  Speaker 5: how hot your relationship is, or how new it is,
• 10:25
  Speaker 5: or how horny you and your partner are, or your
• 10:29
  Speaker 5: you and your throutle are. You know, I don't want
• 10:31
  Speaker 5: to discriminate. Maybe you have more than one lever and
• 10:33
  Speaker 5: a group, but no one wants to fuck in the shower.
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: It's not fun.
• 10:37
  Speaker 5: No woman's sexy, it's not and your penis doesn't no
• 10:42
  Speaker 5: one can feel anything. Also, nobody ever talks about the
• 10:44
  Speaker 5: fact that you can't you kill your penis inside of
• 10:47
  Speaker 5: vagina when you're in the shower.
• 10:48
  Speaker 2: When you're stressing, and like this idea that like, oh,
• 10:51
  Speaker 2: let's have shower sex. I'm like, we're not two gay
• 10:53
  Speaker 2: guys at a crunch on like a Thursday, Like, we're
• 10:55
  Speaker 2: not fucking in a shower.
• 10:57
  Speaker 5: Why do people That's another thing I want to discuss.
• 11:00
  Speaker 5: Thank you for bringing it up. It's like you have ESPN.
• 11:03
  Speaker 5: Why are people fucking at gym? Like gay men specifically?
• 11:08
  Speaker 5: I know some gay men who specifically go to the
• 11:09
  Speaker 5: gym just to give blowjobs in the sauna.
• 11:11
  Speaker 2: I don't understand giving a blowjob, but I understand. I
• 11:14
  Speaker 2: feel like if you're a gay guy, it's like extra testosterone.
• 11:18
  Speaker 6: So it's like at level ten all the time, and.
• 11:20
  Speaker 2: You're like, I gotta get it in because most men would,
• 11:23
  Speaker 2: like my husband is like you just tell me, you
• 11:25
  Speaker 2: just tell me when he's like I'm always ready, and so.
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: It's like it's that times too. You're like, thank you,
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: I didn't know that.
• 11:30
  Speaker 2: I'm like, I know, But the showers, it's just more
• 11:33
  Speaker 2: like you following me in here thinking I'm turning like
• 11:35
  Speaker 2: I'm here to shave my armpits and like give the
• 11:37
  Speaker 2: illusion of a bikini line, and you followed me in.
• 11:40
  Speaker 6: I guess we have a bench in here.
• 11:43
  Speaker 2: One person is always cold, one person's always uncomfortable, the
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: lube gets washed away, perhaps in your.
• 11:49
  Speaker 5: Oh why are you suggesting that you use lube in
• 11:51
  Speaker 5: the shower?
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: I guess you should.
• 11:53
  Speaker 5: It's actually the opposite of a luber can't watter because
• 11:56
  Speaker 5: have you ever tried to fuck in the ocean.
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: It's the same thing.
• 11:59
  Speaker 5: It's the same thing, you know, Yeah, you can't get
• 12:01
  Speaker 5: It's like you need actually you need a lubricant, but
• 12:04
  Speaker 5: who's going to bring a lubricant to the Like you
• 12:06
  Speaker 5: get into the ocean and then lubricate when you're underwater.
• 12:09
  Speaker 1: It's just all anti It's it's like counterintuitive.
• 12:12
  Speaker 2: You have a whole continuousy of like mermaid fans that
• 12:14
  Speaker 2: are like, actually I find aquatic sex.
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: I think it all just makes aquatics.
• 12:19
  Speaker 2: I think it just speaks to like a woman's comfort
• 12:22
  Speaker 2: not being taken into account. And when you're in your twenties,
• 12:25
  Speaker 2: you're just like, yeah, i'll do that. It's hot, but
• 12:26
  Speaker 2: like you're not loving it, no, like, and you're cold,
• 12:29
  Speaker 2: and you're looking down at your feet, which your toes
• 12:31
  Speaker 2: are spread apart so you can get a grip, and
• 12:33
  Speaker 2: you've got your chicken.
• 12:34
  Speaker 1: Feet and your hair.
• 12:35
  Speaker 2: I have curly hair, and so the whole time I'm
• 12:37
  Speaker 2: just like, do I look like the monster from Barbarian like.
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: Which is like, or does your husband's care? Answer? No,
• 12:44
  Speaker 1: he doesn't care.
• 12:45
  Speaker 2: I care, And if I don't feel hot, then it
• 12:48
  Speaker 2: can't happen. And then if I do feel sexy, I'm like,
• 12:50
  Speaker 2: I'm too busy taking a picture of how hot I
• 12:53
  Speaker 2: look to have sex right now?
• 12:54
  Speaker 5: Is that why you wore those pants during your special
• 12:56
  Speaker 5: to show people how hot you are?
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: You need to explain those pants to me? You don't
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: like him? Well, I'm not going to pretend that.
• 13:02
  Speaker 5: I go, I mean, you have, you have an incredible body,
• 13:06
  Speaker 5: and I like that. I like that, I like that
• 13:08
  Speaker 5: you show it off and I understand that.
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: But those pants, I was just like, why, Yeah, why
• 13:14
  Speaker 1: I don't.
• 13:15
  Speaker 2: I don't tell you why because I can, and I
• 13:17
  Speaker 2: think as a woman, I think the more Carlos come
• 13:21
  Speaker 2: on in, Carlos bring that business.
• 13:22
  Speaker 1: No reason you shouldn't become part of this podcast. This
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: is so cute. It's so cute. I didn't even know
• 13:27
  Speaker 1: if this is available in my own home. It's so continental.
• 13:30
  Speaker 1: That's how rich I am. You guys, I didn't even
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: know I had to. She just met Carlos, she didn't
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: even know he was here.
• 13:38
  Speaker 2: I saw, I'm and I love I love a fun
• 13:40
  Speaker 2: pant and the pants that I wore on my last special, I.
• 13:44
  Speaker 1: Remember a similar outfit.
• 13:46
  Speaker 2: It's a similar silhouette and I didn't mean to fall
• 13:48
  Speaker 2: into it, but we all, you know you dress for
• 13:49
  Speaker 2: your body type.
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: What's your body type?
• 13:52
  Speaker 6: Well, the thighs are all like I started doing pilates.
• 13:54
  Speaker 1: It's different, but I don't know strong core.
• 13:56
  Speaker 5: Excuse me one second. I don't want to cough over
• 13:58
  Speaker 5: you pair the okay, go ahead, just I mean.
• 14:04
  Speaker 2: It's just I don't know. I don't like to wear
• 14:05
  Speaker 2: a skirt on stage because I move around a lot.
• 14:07
  Speaker 2: Like there's just things that you that you find empowering.
• 14:10
  Speaker 2: And people were so upset about the last pant and
• 14:12
  Speaker 2: I was like, no, those pants are fire, these pants.
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: I was scrolling through a.
• 14:17
  Speaker 2: Rave party wear website, as one does when they're trying
• 14:20
  Speaker 2: to conceive a child. I had had my daughter, and
• 14:24
  Speaker 2: I don't remember if I had just gotten pregnant with
• 14:26
  Speaker 2: Ethan or we were thinking about it.
• 14:27
  Speaker 1: But I saw those pants and there was something about him.
• 14:30
  Speaker 2: I was like, those do you ever buy like an
• 14:32
  Speaker 2: article of clothing and you're like, I don't have an
• 14:34
  Speaker 2: event now, but I know I will.
• 14:36
  Speaker 6: Does that ever happen to you or do you have someone
• 14:37
  Speaker 6: dress you?
• 14:38
  Speaker 1: Oh god, no, I know what you mean.
• 14:42
  Speaker 2: I saw them and I was like, they're just I
• 14:44
  Speaker 2: liked that they had the microflare, Like I just I
• 14:46
  Speaker 2: was like, that's something aspirational. So I bought them, and
• 14:49
  Speaker 2: then I was pregnant for a full year and then
• 14:53
  Speaker 2: I just worked out every day with those, Like my
• 14:55
  Speaker 2: trainer would be like hips pants pants, like think about
• 14:58
  Speaker 2: the pants, and I just they reminded me of share
• 15:01
  Speaker 2: like turn back down, and I just know that there
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: will be a day that I shouldn't wear those pants, right,
• 15:06
  Speaker 2: And I just thought that they were cool enough while
• 15:09
  Speaker 2: not being super distracting. Do we had to iron out
• 15:13
  Speaker 2: the bulkiness of them in photoshop because they don't lay
• 15:16
  Speaker 2: right because they're like made of cheap plastic. Maybe, But
• 15:19
  Speaker 2: I just was like, these pants will upset enough people, yes,
• 15:22
  Speaker 2: and enliven people, and it'll at least be a talking point.
• 15:26
  Speaker 5: Yeah, well you're right, it is a talking point. So
• 15:28
  Speaker 5: good for you, mausotop, thank you. I was just I
• 15:30
  Speaker 5: thought they were just cool and I just liked them. Well,
• 15:33
  Speaker 5: I like that you It doesn't really matter if I
• 15:36
  Speaker 5: like them or not, it matters that you take a
• 15:37
  Speaker 5: risk and are like, you know, stepping into your own power,
• 15:40
  Speaker 5: and like, I'm gonna fucking wear these pants.
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: That's all that really matters.
• 15:43
  Speaker 2: That's what I mean. And also I do feel empowered
• 15:46
  Speaker 2: in them, and I do. It's like an extension of
• 15:48
  Speaker 2: who you are on stage. And I also think I
• 15:51
  Speaker 2: come from a generation of stand up and I definitely
• 15:55
  Speaker 2: was a huge part of this, Like just wearing a
• 15:56
  Speaker 2: hoodie on stage. I think there's a I think there's
• 15:58
  Speaker 2: a video of view of like at the Ice House
• 16:00
  Speaker 2: like four hundred years ago, and you're wearing a hoodie, right, Like,
• 16:03
  Speaker 2: I feel like we women weren't encouraged to do that.
• 16:06
  Speaker 2: And now I look at younger girls and they're just
• 16:08
  Speaker 2: like in a bra on stage and they don't think
• 16:10
  Speaker 2: about it, and I think that that's great, And so
• 16:13
  Speaker 2: I have to push myself to be like, no, you
• 16:15
  Speaker 2: can wear these things. You don't have to cover up,
• 16:17
  Speaker 2: and you can just be yourself on stage. And so
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: when I do large shows, I feel.
• 16:21
  Speaker 9: Do you.
• 16:22
  Speaker 5: When I came up, I was always trying to play
• 16:25
  Speaker 5: down my looks and be more tomboys, and I've never
• 16:28
  Speaker 5: really like I've never really worn a dress on stage
• 16:31
  Speaker 5: or a skirt on stage, Like even when I used
• 16:33
  Speaker 5: to wear heels on stage, I'm like, this is so annoying,
• 16:37
  Speaker 5: Like this is not who.
• 16:37
  Speaker 1: I would ever be in real life.
• 16:39
  Speaker 5: But did you feel like you had to dial down
• 16:41
  Speaker 5: your looks when you were eyeing up?
• 16:43
  Speaker 2: I think it's something that people talked about, But I like,
• 16:45
  Speaker 2: you can't.
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: Be funny and pretty, so cool it with the pretty?
• 16:48
  Speaker 2: Oh it was more normally it was an accusation like
• 16:50
  Speaker 2: funny and pretty, like what's the catch, And you're like,
• 16:52
  Speaker 2: I don't know, You're really ugly, so obviously it's the catch.
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: I have herpes, that's the catch, and I have I'm dying.
• 17:00
  Speaker 2: I am a tomboy, like I always grew up wearing
• 17:02
  Speaker 2: big T shirts and not really you know, you maybe
• 17:05
  Speaker 2: wear a tank top to a college bar when you're out,
• 17:08
  Speaker 2: but on stage, I just was always comfortable as that,
• 17:10
  Speaker 2: so I never went out of my way. But I
• 17:12
  Speaker 2: always felt like, remember I wore white ripped jeans on
• 17:15
  Speaker 2: stage at the Comedy Store in like twenty eleven and
• 17:18
  Speaker 2: I had a bad set and I was like, must
• 17:19
  Speaker 2: have been the jeans.
• 17:20
  Speaker 1: We'll always dial it back and there is as a woman.
• 17:23
  Speaker 2: When you come on stage, if you do have a
• 17:25
  Speaker 2: good body and your dress sexy or it's revealing, especially
• 17:29
  Speaker 2: if you're unknown, it does take the audience and extra
• 17:32
  Speaker 2: ninety seconds to get over it. And I was always
• 17:34
  Speaker 2: of the mindset like, Nope, I need to get you
• 17:36
  Speaker 2: right up top because I've got something to say and
• 17:37
  Speaker 2: I don't have these eight minutes. But as an adult,
• 17:39
  Speaker 2: I try to take more time.
• 17:40
  Speaker 8: Now.
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and we're supper hands.
• 17:42
  Speaker 5: I mean you do jam a lot of material into
• 17:45
  Speaker 5: an hour. Yeah, And I don't mean jam as a negative.
• 17:47
  Speaker 5: I mean you really get so much bang for your
• 17:51
  Speaker 5: buck with every sentence, every joke, every premise you it's
• 17:56
  Speaker 5: very full body.
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: Thank you. I like that. It's very artistic.
• 18:00
  Speaker 5: I appreciate that artist, and in the form of stand
• 18:03
  Speaker 5: up like that's very very well done.
• 18:05
  Speaker 2: Thank you, Chelsea Handler. That means a lot I do.
• 18:09
  Speaker 2: I was watching some of Ali Wong the other day
• 18:11
  Speaker 2: and she's very deliberate and she speaks will say slower
• 18:14
  Speaker 2: than I do. I mean most auctioneers do. And I
• 18:16
  Speaker 2: was watching that, I was like, I could have gotten
• 18:18
  Speaker 2: two hours out of this if I just did like
• 18:21
  Speaker 2: a long pace, if I just spoke like every other
• 18:23
  Speaker 2: comic and just took my.
• 18:26
  Speaker 1: I was like, there's an art to this.
• 18:27
  Speaker 2: I gotta slow down and I won't have to work
• 18:29
  Speaker 2: as hard to write, Like I can just have two
• 18:32
  Speaker 2: hours out of this one.
• 18:33
  Speaker 1: So doesn't it feel like stand up feels like such
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: a hustle? Right?
• 18:38
  Speaker 5: Like it is you're constantly if you're a stand up
• 18:40
  Speaker 5: comedian and that's your main vocation. I mean, obviously we
• 18:44
  Speaker 5: all have ancillary things we do, but like, if that's
• 18:47
  Speaker 5: your main vocation, it is constant fucking hustle, traveling.
• 18:51
  Speaker 6: I feel hustling and I do hustle.
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it is. I mean you're a real stand up
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: you get it.
• 18:57
  Speaker 2: Like it's not like something that you picked up once
• 18:59
  Speaker 2: you became famous, which a lot of people do.
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: I don't think people fully.
• 19:04
  Speaker 2: Understand, like especially when you're an artist versus just a
• 19:07
  Speaker 2: joke teller, Like when you actually do bleed for this
• 19:10
  Speaker 2: and this is something that you that is you're married
• 19:13
  Speaker 2: to in a sense, you are the engine. And I
• 19:16
  Speaker 2: was actually thinking about that on the way over here,
• 19:18
  Speaker 2: Like if I don't write, if I don't push myself
• 19:21
  Speaker 2: to work out and to write this, there's no one
• 19:23
  Speaker 2: writing it for me. There's no studio calling being like
• 19:26
  Speaker 2: we're gonna put a team together.
• 19:28
  Speaker 6: What's your next thing?
• 19:29
  Speaker 2: If you don't write your books, if you don't create
• 19:32
  Speaker 2: these things, especially when you're a funny woman, because no
• 19:35
  Speaker 2: one can create the funny for you. People could, of
• 19:36
  Speaker 2: course write you some jokes, but like the engine is me.
• 19:40
  Speaker 2: And when I take a break, like there's no one
• 19:42
  Speaker 2: knocking at the door, like are you done taking your break? Yes,
• 19:44
  Speaker 2: I'm sure people would prefer I just take the break forever.
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: Well, it's you're completely self reliant.
• 19:49
  Speaker 2: There's no like, there's no safety net. Yeah, right, like
• 19:52
  Speaker 2: the mortgages are in my name.
• 19:54
  Speaker 5: But that's also kind of a nice thing that. Conversely,
• 19:57
  Speaker 5: there's like a flip side of it, which is you're
• 20:00
  Speaker 5: not really answering to anybody but yourself.
• 20:04
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I think so, yes, because I can't take those breaks.
• 20:08
  Speaker 1: I can take that vacation.
• 20:09
  Speaker 2: But I do feel that we've I think we're coming
• 20:12
  Speaker 2: away from it now. But we did get to a
• 20:13
  Speaker 2: place in comedy where you were answering to a very
• 20:18
  Speaker 2: loud minority on the Internet. And those are the people
• 20:21
  Speaker 2: that were canceling people, people that had nothing and were
• 20:24
  Speaker 2: angry at you for trying, and those voices got amplified,
• 20:28
  Speaker 2: so I was never answering to them, but there was
• 20:30
  Speaker 2: like a stutter step, especially as a woman, because we're
• 20:32
  Speaker 2: expected to be kinder and empathetic at every turn.
• 20:36
  Speaker 6: Meanwhile, guys are like, oh yeah.
• 20:37
  Speaker 2: I got this underage hand job and it felt great,
• 20:40
  Speaker 2: and uh yeah, maybe women shouldn't be allowed to read,
• 20:42
  Speaker 2: and it's just like, oh, more of that, please, And
• 20:45
  Speaker 2: I get up here. And if I'm like, oh, yeah,
• 20:47
  Speaker 2: I chose to have.
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: Two kids, it's like, why didn't you have three? Do
• 20:50
  Speaker 1: you hate women who don't have kids?
• 20:51
  Speaker 2: And you're just like, all right, you're constantly having to
• 20:55
  Speaker 2: answer for what you have done and haven't done as
• 20:58
  Speaker 2: a woman. And I think that we're swinging the other
• 21:01
  Speaker 2: way where now you can kind of just make statements
• 21:03
  Speaker 2: and not have to Well.
• 21:04
  Speaker 5: Now that Trump is pregnant, pregnant, now that he's been
• 21:08
  Speaker 5: pregnant for quite some time. But now that Trump is president,
• 21:10
  Speaker 5: I'm sure all that political correctness everything's out the window.
• 21:15
  Speaker 5: Something else you talk about in your stand up is,
• 21:17
  Speaker 5: which I think is so great, when men congratulate other
• 21:21
  Speaker 5: men for impregnating their wives, Like when Eliza's husband's friend.
• 21:28
  Speaker 6: Or stranger stranger usually stranger.
• 21:30
  Speaker 1: Right finds out that you're pregnant, especially.
• 21:33
  Speaker 2: With a boy, especially, they love to know there's a
• 21:36
  Speaker 2: boy in the world, right, but men will There's it's
• 21:39
  Speaker 2: the weirdness, the dystopian weirdness of standing there while one
• 21:43
  Speaker 2: man congratulates my husband, not me, on the pregnancy. I'm
• 21:48
  Speaker 2: like he played the smallest part, like I am doing
• 21:50
  Speaker 2: all the work, and it is like congratulations, six seconds,
• 21:53
  Speaker 2: well done, and you're just standing there. It's super Handmaid's
• 21:56
  Speaker 2: Tale and you're just like, well, I was just glad
• 21:58
  Speaker 2: to receive.
• 21:59
  Speaker 5: It's it's not their party, and what are they congratulating
• 22:03
  Speaker 5: each other on.
• 22:04
  Speaker 1: Seriously, though, when.
• 22:05
  Speaker 5: You think about it, it's like, yeah, way to go,
• 22:07
  Speaker 5: fuck your wife and get her pregnant.
• 22:09
  Speaker 2: Way to go, way to go, because men love to
• 22:12
  Speaker 2: know other men are having sex. And like two guys
• 22:15
  Speaker 2: at a bar, if a guy leaves with a girl,
• 22:16
  Speaker 2: a guy will just high five and be like a
• 22:18
  Speaker 2: nice job.
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: Women are like, don't go with him.
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: That doesn't feel safe, Like we don't want anyone having sex, Yeah,
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: we want and men or just like just however, you
• 22:25
  Speaker 2: got to get it in and it's it's primal and
• 22:28
  Speaker 2: it's the way they are.
• 22:28
  Speaker 1: But I want the congratulations as well.
• 22:31
  Speaker 5: You did you have sex with a lot of car
• 22:32
  Speaker 5: or did you have a lot of boyfriend comics?
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: No? Ever, No, none. You never dated a comic?
• 22:37
  Speaker 2: I did, but so long ago, and I kind of
• 22:40
  Speaker 2: just stayed out of it. But a big reason I did,
• 22:43
  Speaker 2: and I think you can probably relate to this. I
• 22:45
  Speaker 2: became a headliner so early in my career, so.
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: From winning Last Comic Standing, Yes, and so.
• 22:52
  Speaker 2: That was like twenty five, and so that's the time
• 22:54
  Speaker 2: of your life where you are looking to at the time,
• 22:57
  Speaker 2: mostly men who were in positions of power for validation
• 23:00
  Speaker 2: to take you on the road. And it's not that
• 23:03
  Speaker 2: women always sleep with those guys, but that I didn't
• 23:06
  Speaker 2: need that from a man, and I certainly didn't want
• 23:08
  Speaker 2: to date a coworker or someone who was less funny
• 23:11
  Speaker 2: or successful than me.
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: So that pool was pretty much shot.
• 23:15
  Speaker 2: And I think men, you know, you try to date
• 23:17
  Speaker 2: a male comic who doesn't do as well as you,
• 23:19
  Speaker 2: they always get jealous. So I just never it was
• 23:22
  Speaker 2: never my dating pool.
• 23:23
  Speaker 8: Mm hmmm.
• 23:24
  Speaker 1: I'm trying to think if I made out with any
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: of them. I don't even think so. I once had
• 23:27
  Speaker 1: sex with Tom Roads. Do you know who Tom Roads is?
• 23:29
  Speaker 6: I just canceled on a lineup he was on the
• 23:31
  Speaker 6: other night.
• 23:31
  Speaker 1: Oh oh, I was like, did he do something? Was
• 23:34
  Speaker 1: he canceled? He's very nice. He's a sweetheart. I once
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: had sex looking Yeah he and yeah he is still
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: good looking. He came up to me.
• 23:40
  Speaker 5: We were at the n Airport Lounge the other day
• 23:43
  Speaker 5: and he American and he I was with my cousin
• 23:47
  Speaker 5: and he was like, hey, Chelsea just wanted to say hello,
• 23:49
  Speaker 5: and I.
• 23:49
  Speaker 1: Just thought he was he shook your hand.
• 23:51
  Speaker 5: I thought he was a rando. Like I just thought
• 23:52
  Speaker 5: he was a fan or something. And I said, oh, hi,
• 23:54
  Speaker 5: nice to me. He goes, it's me Tom Rhodes. And
• 23:57
  Speaker 5: I'm like, oh hi, Like because I did fuck him
• 24:00
  Speaker 5: many many years ago in San Francisco, and it was
• 24:03
  Speaker 5: one of those great experiences where you have a kind
• 24:05
  Speaker 5: of fun one night stand. Like I never really dated
• 24:08
  Speaker 5: that many comics. I mean, I know I did a
• 24:09
  Speaker 5: Joe Coy, but that was like PostScript of like comedy
• 24:13
  Speaker 5: coming up time. And he's one of those comics I
• 24:15
  Speaker 5: had sex with. And when he walked away Molly's like,
• 24:17
  Speaker 5: who is that. I'm like, oh, this comic Tom Roads.
• 24:19
  Speaker 5: I had sex with him, like many many moons ago.
• 24:21
  Speaker 5: And I didn't say moons ago because I don't say that,
• 24:24
  Speaker 5: but I remember having a great interlude with him. We
• 24:26
  Speaker 5: had sex, We had a fun night in San Francisco.
• 24:29
  Speaker 5: We were fucked up drinking and whoever, who knows whatever else,
• 24:33
  Speaker 5: And then we tried to reenact it in LA and
• 24:37
  Speaker 5: he like a couple months later.
• 24:39
  Speaker 6: Just after you were you or is this before your
• 24:41
  Speaker 6: shot I.
• 24:41
  Speaker 1: Was coming up.
• 24:42
  Speaker 8: I wasn't.
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: No, I was like, you know, starting out.
• 24:45
  Speaker 5: And I think I was opening for him at the
• 24:47
  Speaker 5: San Francisco Punchline probably like I was probably the opener.
• 24:49
  Speaker 5: There was a middle and he was the headliner. And
• 24:52
  Speaker 5: so we ended up having you know, a great night
• 24:55
  Speaker 5: on our last night of the week. And then we
• 24:57
  Speaker 5: tried to recreate it in LA and I met him
• 25:00
  Speaker 5: at the comedy store here in LA and it was
• 25:02
  Speaker 5: a I think I got my period, Like it was
• 25:05
  Speaker 5: one of the worst hookups ever.
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: You know what, Sometimes so you just have to leave
• 25:08
  Speaker 1: something alone, like never speak to me.
• 25:10
  Speaker 5: Just because you have one good night with a person
• 25:12
  Speaker 5: doesn't mean you should ever see them again. It's like
• 25:15
  Speaker 5: when you go to a really good restaurant when you're
• 25:16
  Speaker 5: on vacation, don't go back there the next night because
• 25:19
  Speaker 5: it was so good the first night, Well, only disappoint you.
• 25:21
  Speaker 1: I feel that way.
• 25:22
  Speaker 2: With like an entree, I'll be like I want to
• 25:23
  Speaker 2: order another one, yes, or like the second. You can
• 25:25
  Speaker 2: never have two egg mcmuffins. Like the first yeah so delicious, Yeah, No,
• 25:31
  Speaker 2: I love egg mcmuffins, the second one the instant diarrhea.
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: What they need to do is make eggman muffins a
• 25:36
  Speaker 1: little bit bigger. When we went through COVID, I had
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: my housekeeper.
• 25:39
  Speaker 5: I'm like, just go stock up on as many egg
• 25:41
  Speaker 5: mcmuffins as possible because I'm not gonna be able to
• 25:43
  Speaker 5: go to McDonald's and I fucking love eg mcmuffins.
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: Stop up stock of freezing them.
• 25:48
  Speaker 5: But yeah, I was freezing them, and they are not
• 25:50
  Speaker 5: as good when you freeze them. No, he turns out,
• 25:54
  Speaker 5: was like nothing got me off of them quicker than
• 25:57
  Speaker 5: freezing them.
• 25:57
  Speaker 1: I'm like, these are not good at all.
• 26:00
  Speaker 2: And also get you offer them. Having two on like
• 26:02
  Speaker 2: a regional flight in the Northeast, You're like for years
• 26:08
  Speaker 2: when I when I was first traveling, you know, you
• 26:10
  Speaker 2: get there to the airport and I was like, okay,
• 26:11
  Speaker 2: I nevery McDonald's, but this is my my allowance at
• 26:15
  Speaker 2: the airport.
• 26:15
  Speaker 6: Will have it, And then one time I had two.
• 26:17
  Speaker 6: Never again. Yeah, I definitely agree.
• 26:20
  Speaker 2: With you about the Sometimes you have these wonderful moments
• 26:26
  Speaker 2: like the sexual encounter and it's just and no one's jealous,
• 26:29
  Speaker 2: it's not weird, And I feel like women so rarely
• 26:32
  Speaker 2: get to have those where you're like, I don't even
• 26:33
  Speaker 2: want it again, I don't want to date you like that.
• 26:36
  Speaker 2: That hit the spot. And even though I didn't get
• 26:38
  Speaker 2: off like that was still great. Thank you so much.
• 26:41
  Speaker 1: YE need it again.
• 26:42
  Speaker 5: And it's a good lesson to know, Like for our
• 26:45
  Speaker 5: young listeners, it's a good lesson to know just because
• 26:48
  Speaker 5: you have a great night with somebody doesn't mean that
• 26:51
  Speaker 5: you need to have another great night with them.
• 26:53
  Speaker 1: Like sometimes it's okay.
• 26:54
  Speaker 5: Just to like read a good book and let it go,
• 26:56
  Speaker 5: like you don't have to keep rereading it.
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: I did.
• 26:59
  Speaker 2: I will say, you don't who this person is. There
• 27:01
  Speaker 2: was a total power reversal. I was playing somewhere I'm
• 27:05
  Speaker 2: not even gonna say the city or anything, and it was.
• 27:08
  Speaker 2: It was a younger comic that I had known forever,
• 27:11
  Speaker 2: and they opened for me ran like guest sets at
• 27:15
  Speaker 2: this in this city and I'd see them as every
• 27:17
  Speaker 2: few years. And he came over and he just went
• 27:20
  Speaker 2: down on me. I have never shared the story, and
• 27:22
  Speaker 2: it felt so powerful because normally it's the other way,
• 27:25
  Speaker 2: or you have some weird sex.
• 27:26
  Speaker 6: And I just let him and it was great.
• 27:29
  Speaker 2: And I had to leave early the next morning, and
• 27:30
  Speaker 2: I was like, you can eat whatever you want out
• 27:31
  Speaker 2: of the mini bar.
• 27:32
  Speaker 1: I gotta go, and I just.
• 27:33
  Speaker 5: After you're done eating me out, you can eat whatever
• 27:35
  Speaker 5: you want out of the mini bar.
• 27:37
  Speaker 2: And it was great and I and it was and
• 27:39
  Speaker 2: I felt like a real headliner and it just it's
• 27:42
  Speaker 2: like a nice memory.
• 27:43
  Speaker 6: And I never really talked to this person, but like.
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that was nice of you to let them do that. Yeah,
• 27:48
  Speaker 1: that's what I clean. That's nice to.
• 27:50
  Speaker 5: Let somebody go down on you. Like that's the way
• 27:52
  Speaker 5: that women should be viewing that. That's a nice thing
• 27:54
  Speaker 5: to do for another person. It's not necessarily all about us.
• 27:58
  Speaker 5: It's like, well that's awesome, so like you know, friendly.
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you're gonna love this.
• 28:03
  Speaker 2: And it felt like powerful and cool and it didn't
• 28:05
  Speaker 2: feel like anyone was taking advantage. And I definitely then
• 28:08
  Speaker 2: it was weird because like that person brought their family
• 28:10
  Speaker 2: to see me, like two years later, I'm like, here's
• 28:12
  Speaker 2: some tickets and no problem.
• 28:14
  Speaker 1: Like a nice relationship.
• 28:15
  Speaker 5: Did you feel like did you feel when that happened
• 28:19
  Speaker 5: and they came back around with their family?
• 28:20
  Speaker 1: Did you feel any itck at all? Like oh no, keep.
• 28:24
  Speaker 2: In touch like over DM and he's like, hey, my family,
• 28:26
  Speaker 2: can I get tickets?
• 28:27
  Speaker 1: I'm like, Andy's a fan.
• 28:28
  Speaker 2: Great, of course you can have tickets with your sweet
• 28:31
  Speaker 2: family also has to go down.
• 28:33
  Speaker 5: How did you meet your How did every family member
• 28:35
  Speaker 5: needs to go down on you?
• 28:36
  Speaker 1: How did you meet your husband?
• 28:38
  Speaker 6: That was him?
• 28:41
  Speaker 1: I met him on Riya. Oh really Ya's success store.
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: Have you've been of course?
• 28:46
  Speaker 5: Yeah, lots of different sex on RYA different like countries.
• 28:49
  Speaker 5: I find RYA to'd be great for like when you're
• 28:51
  Speaker 5: in the UK or New York or like it's a
• 28:53
  Speaker 5: nice hotspot and it and it and it gives you
• 28:56
  Speaker 5: a I mean now it's opened up a little bit
• 28:59
  Speaker 5: more and expanded, but when I was using it a lot,
• 29:02
  Speaker 5: it gives you a more what is the word that
• 29:04
  Speaker 5: I'm thinking of, like continental more continental buffet. It gives
• 29:09
  Speaker 5: you more of a grouping of people that are actually
• 29:13
  Speaker 5: a little bit more rightly elevated. Yeah, than that's what
• 29:15
  Speaker 5: we're going to find on like Twitter, I mean not Twitter, sorry,
• 29:18
  Speaker 5: Tinder or like hinge or whatever. It's just like a
• 29:20
  Speaker 5: little bit more of a guarantee that we're not to
• 29:22
  Speaker 5: find curated.
• 29:23
  Speaker 1: That was the word I was thinking about.
• 29:26
  Speaker 2: Well, you know, people will grimace at well bristle at that.
• 29:29
  Speaker 2: But like if you have a public profile, like if
• 29:31
  Speaker 2: you are a celebrity at all, you can't open yourself
• 29:34
  Speaker 2: up to just going out with whomever. And so for
• 29:37
  Speaker 2: the longest time, for me, like I was never so
• 29:40
  Speaker 2: like I wasn't famous enough that I was like at
• 29:42
  Speaker 2: Denzel's Denzel, why.
• 29:44
  Speaker 6: Would we find Denzel Washington?
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: Oh my god?
• 29:48
  Speaker 2: Or like I just wasn't at famous people's houses. But
• 29:52
  Speaker 2: I was famous enough that I couldn't just pick up
• 29:55
  Speaker 2: a random person. So you would rely on like friend recommendations,
• 29:59
  Speaker 2: you know, idea did someone I knew in college, and
• 30:02
  Speaker 2: you just would find these people sort of natively. And
• 30:04
  Speaker 2: then Riot came along, and so it wasn't necessarily other celebrities,
• 30:08
  Speaker 2: but it was like verified, like, oh, I'm an artist too,
• 30:11
  Speaker 2: Like I get it.
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: So you don't leave your cause it's a vulnerable thing
• 30:14
  Speaker 1: to go out with someone.
• 30:15
  Speaker 5: Well of course, of course, especially when you know, yeah,
• 30:18
  Speaker 5: especially when you are a celebrity and they know who
• 30:21
  Speaker 5: you are and you're like putting yourself out there. I'm
• 30:24
  Speaker 5: of the ilk that you just let go of all
• 30:26
  Speaker 5: of that, Like, who gives a fuck? You know you're
• 30:28
  Speaker 5: gonna walk around being this person in your real life regardless.
• 30:31
  Speaker 5: So when people who are friends of mine are like,
• 30:34
  Speaker 5: how could you go on those sites, I'm like easily,
• 30:36
  Speaker 5: you know, I'm trying to get some action.
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: Right also at this like who cares? Like I don't
• 30:40
  Speaker 1: care if they know that I'm on this site. That
• 30:42
  Speaker 1: doesn't bother me.
• 30:43
  Speaker 2: Right, especially not now, I think like the stigma of
• 30:45
  Speaker 2: online dating is completely gone. Everybody does it. It makes a
• 30:48
  Speaker 2: lot of sense. You can't go out every single night,
• 30:50
  Speaker 2: but I do think you know, when you're younger, you're
• 30:53
  Speaker 2: just trying to like sort it out, and you don't
• 30:54
  Speaker 2: know what someone else's intention is right when they go
• 30:57
  Speaker 2: and then you bring them to your house or you
• 30:59
  Speaker 2: go to like it's just weird. But I did meet him.
• 31:01
  Speaker 2: He was not a celebrity, and I was like, who
• 31:03
  Speaker 2: let you in here? But he was just so funny
• 31:06
  Speaker 2: and so easy to talk to.
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: And then that was that. Wow.
• 31:09
  Speaker 6: I was his first Riot date.
• 31:10
  Speaker 2: He was like, I don't know my fifth or something like,
• 31:13
  Speaker 2: I hadn't been on that long and it just worked.
• 31:15
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 31:15
  Speaker 2: He was so lovely and that was like day one
• 31:18
  Speaker 2: and like that was it. And so what kind of
• 31:20
  Speaker 2: artist is he?
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: He's a chef.
• 31:21
  Speaker 6: Oh, but he's a I should have brought you a book.
• 31:24
  Speaker 2: He's a cookbook author and chef and and a writer
• 31:28
  Speaker 2: and so he writes a lot of you know, articles,
• 31:30
  Speaker 2: free length.
• 31:30
  Speaker 6: But he is a chef and cookbook author.
• 31:32
  Speaker 1: That's cool. It was cool.
• 31:33
  Speaker 2: And when I met him, he was he had opened
• 31:35
  Speaker 2: you ever are you a regular eater or do you
• 31:37
  Speaker 2: eat not eat meat or anything? No, I'm a regular
• 31:40
  Speaker 2: regular person. He was the opening chef for Bloodsoe's Barbecue
• 31:43
  Speaker 2: on Libreak, which is like an LA staple. And he
• 31:47
  Speaker 2: has his cookbooks. He writes cookbooks. He has one coming out.
• 31:50
  Speaker 2: Do you ever eat at found Oyster? You're very far
• 31:52
  Speaker 2: west over here, so I don't know, I know but
• 31:53
  Speaker 2: I've heard of found Oyster. I love oysters. So Ari
• 31:56
  Speaker 2: Culiner he wrote Ari's book and that comes out called
• 31:58
  Speaker 2: How to Cook the Finest Things in the Sea. So
• 32:00
  Speaker 2: he's the guy that he's got James Beard's Award. Like,
• 32:02
  Speaker 2: he's the guy you go to if you're like, I
• 32:03
  Speaker 2: want to do a cookbook. He will capture your voice
• 32:05
  Speaker 2: and write that way with you and recipe test.
• 32:07
  Speaker 5: That's such a nice refreshing vocation. It's so it's great
• 32:11
  Speaker 5: in this town especially.
• 32:12
  Speaker 2: Yeah, he's not like a fake chef or a photographer
• 32:15
  Speaker 2: or a producer.
• 32:16
  Speaker 5: I mean a photographers at least, can you know, take photographs,
• 32:19
  Speaker 5: but producers is a little bit of a gray area,
• 32:22
  Speaker 5: as we all know.
• 32:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah, Okay, on that notework.
• 32:25
  Speaker 5: We're going to take a break and we'll be right
• 32:27
  Speaker 5: back with Eliza's Schlessinger. And we're back with Eliza Slessenger. Okay, Catherine,
• 32:37
  Speaker 5: why do we have what's happening?
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: We actually have two blakes today? Oh my god? More
• 32:42
  Speaker 1: is it a blake Lively calling in for advice? She
• 32:44
  Speaker 1: calls in one more time. I swear to god.
• 32:46
  Speaker 6: She's like, I'm your neighbor, Chelsea.
• 32:48
  Speaker 1: My god, Well, our first Blake of the day.
• 32:51
  Speaker 3: He says, Dear Chelsea, I'm a thirty one year old
• 32:54
  Speaker 3: trans man who lives in northern Ontario, Canada. I grew
• 32:57
  Speaker 3: up very liberal, where being who you are was not
• 32:59
  Speaker 3: a crime shameful. And now I'm married and I've been
• 33:02
  Speaker 3: with my wife for almost six years now. She comes
• 33:04
  Speaker 3: from a very conservative Christian home and her family took
• 33:07
  Speaker 3: a while to warm up to me. They never came
• 33:09
  Speaker 3: to our wedding because it's a sin quote unquote and
• 33:12
  Speaker 3: they don't agree with our lifestyle. They still aren't on
• 33:14
  Speaker 3: board with us to this day, but then they claim
• 33:17
  Speaker 3: to love us and all of that fun stuff.
• 33:18
  Speaker 1: People say.
• 33:19
  Speaker 3: Should I continue to be the bigger person and continue
• 33:22
  Speaker 3: to just visit them like they haven't done anything wrong?
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: I don't know what to do. Hi, Hi Blake, Hi Blake.
• 33:29
  Speaker 2: I can give you the carrot at the bottom next
• 33:32
  Speaker 2: to the microphone.
• 33:34
  Speaker 9: Got it?
• 33:34
  Speaker 8: Yeah?
• 33:36
  Speaker 5: Hi, that's one millennia helping another, just doing what I can.
• 33:40
  Speaker 1: Hi, Hi Blake Lively, how are you?
• 33:43
  Speaker 7: I'm good?
• 33:43
  Speaker 8: Thank you?
• 33:44
  Speaker 7: How are you guys today?
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: We're so tired of hearing about you.
• 33:48
  Speaker 5: Okay, so your wife's parents they know you're trans, correct
• 33:52
  Speaker 5: and that's the big issue.
• 33:54
  Speaker 7: Yeah, when her and her ex husband's blake, he got
• 33:58
  Speaker 7: mad and he went and told her family about me.
• 34:03
  Speaker 1: Doesn't matter. Were you guys having an affair?
• 34:05
  Speaker 8: No?
• 34:06
  Speaker 1: So, how what is he why? I'm confused? Why was
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: he even in the picture? Just a jealous ex?
• 34:13
  Speaker 8: Yeah?
• 34:14
  Speaker 5: But if you weren't in the picture, then how did
• 34:15
  Speaker 5: he know about her? How do you already know about
• 34:17
  Speaker 5: this story before.
• 34:18
  Speaker 1: I started dating?
• 34:18
  Speaker 2: And then he was like, well, I'm still bitter about this.
• 34:20
  Speaker 2: Oh so he because I'm in Ontario with nothing else
• 34:23
  Speaker 2: to do, I know what I'll do. I'll fuck up
• 34:26
  Speaker 2: her life because she left me. It didn't work. I
• 34:29
  Speaker 2: had a micro penis.
• 34:31
  Speaker 5: And are they they're nice to you other than what
• 34:34
  Speaker 5: you're talking about, Like, is it civil when you see them?
• 34:37
  Speaker 8: Yes, it is civil.
• 34:39
  Speaker 7: It's just the fact that I know the things that
• 34:42
  Speaker 7: have been said, And I guess that's just the bitter
• 34:47
  Speaker 7: aspect of it, where it's like you've never apologized. But
• 34:51
  Speaker 7: it's also I shouldn't have to carry that, I guess.
• 34:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 34:56
  Speaker 5: No, I mean I always have a different kind of
• 34:59
  Speaker 5: feeling about this day to day. But I just feel like,
• 35:03
  Speaker 5: as long as you can be civil with each other.
• 35:05
  Speaker 5: It's kind of an opportunity to demonstrate love and kindness.
• 35:08
  Speaker 1: That's exactly right, and to just.
• 35:10
  Speaker 5: Be like this great person in their lives and show
• 35:14
  Speaker 5: all your great qualities and not judge them for their ignorance.
• 35:17
  Speaker 1: That's right, you know what I mean?
• 35:19
  Speaker 5: Because I think you can get a lot farther by
• 35:22
  Speaker 5: that with that attitude, I am always like, fuck off,
• 35:25
  Speaker 5: shut it down.
• 35:25
  Speaker 1: If someone is an asshole, then fire.
• 35:27
  Speaker 5: But if they're not being abusive to you, if they're
• 35:30
  Speaker 5: not being nasty to you to your face anyway, who
• 35:33
  Speaker 5: cares what they say behind your back? That's really not
• 35:35
  Speaker 5: your business anyway, you know what I mean.
• 35:37
  Speaker 2: That's on them, I think because it's easy for us
• 35:40
  Speaker 2: as like heterosexual people to be like whatever, big deal,
• 35:42
  Speaker 2: But like you also carry whatever comes along with being
• 35:45
  Speaker 2: trans and what you think the world thinks of that
• 35:47
  Speaker 2: and the way that you either are treated or perceive
• 35:50
  Speaker 2: that you're being treated like, there's a weight to that.
• 35:52
  Speaker 6: If someone says anything to you, you're always.
• 35:54
  Speaker 2: Going to be wondering, is it because I'm trans in
• 35:56
  Speaker 2: the way that we're like, is it because I'm a woman?
• 35:58
  Speaker 2: Is it because of my color? Is it because of
• 35:59
  Speaker 2: this whatever? We all have that, and I think you're
• 36:02
  Speaker 2: absolutely right. It's your chance to show them all the
• 36:06
  Speaker 2: kindness and love that the queer, trans whatever community always preaches.
• 36:11
  Speaker 2: And it definitely hurts, it hurts your feelings, but you
• 36:15
  Speaker 2: want them to feel so bad that they weren't the kind,
• 36:18
  Speaker 2: loving Christians that they talk about. When you leave, you
• 36:22
  Speaker 2: want to be and you don't have to be fake,
• 36:24
  Speaker 2: but you don't let them take away who you actually are.
• 36:28
  Speaker 2: Don't let them decide for you that you are all
• 36:31
  Speaker 2: the awful things that they've decided you are or trans
• 36:34
  Speaker 2: people are, and you just keep demonstrating it. And if
• 36:37
  Speaker 2: they want to be man enough to say it to you,
• 36:39
  Speaker 2: then you can have that conversation. But I think a
• 36:41
  Speaker 2: lot of times we come at people with very charged
• 36:44
  Speaker 2: with anger when they have an idea about who we are,
• 36:47
  Speaker 2: and then we end up proving that. And this is
• 36:50
  Speaker 2: a chance to sort of deflate some of that ignorance.
• 36:54
  Speaker 1: Like prove them wrong.
• 36:54
  Speaker 2: Basically, Yeah, I mean, what do they think they just
• 36:57
  Speaker 2: the knock is that you used to be a woman
• 37:00
  Speaker 2: with their daughter. That's the knock. It's not that you're
• 37:03
  Speaker 2: a bad person. They can and they can't handle that.
• 37:06
  Speaker 2: It is a foreign concept, like gay we've all sort
• 37:09
  Speaker 2: of wrapped our minds around, but it is if you
• 37:11
  Speaker 2: consider where they're coming from, Like, that's a lot to
• 37:13
  Speaker 2: take on. You are probably the only trans person they know.
• 37:16
  Speaker 1: I was, yeah, oh is there another? Is your wife? Now? Trans?
• 37:21
  Speaker 7: What a plot twist? No, it's just this small community
• 37:27
  Speaker 7: that they live in. There's others that have come out
• 37:30
  Speaker 7: of the woodworks. I guess you could say, since you know,
• 37:33
  Speaker 7: if we live in the woodworks. But yeah, I'm still
• 37:36
  Speaker 7: like the only one they personally know though, this.
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: Is the only one sucking their daughter.
• 37:40
  Speaker 6: Yeah, that's right, so that you know, of you, I
• 37:43
  Speaker 6: sure hope.
• 37:44
  Speaker 2: So this is your chance for them to be like,
• 37:48
  Speaker 2: I know my son in law's trans and he's great. Yes,
• 37:50
  Speaker 2: we token is we do with everyone. We're like, well,
• 37:52
  Speaker 2: I've got a Filipino friend. She seems cool, so they
• 37:54
  Speaker 2: all must be. I've got a Jewish friend and they
• 37:56
  Speaker 2: don't seem awful. They all must be. This is your
• 37:59
  Speaker 2: chance to like show up and be like, look out, fuckings,
• 38:02
  Speaker 2: don't worry.
• 38:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and just right like rise above that. You know
• 38:05
  Speaker 1: what I mean. Their problems are not your problems.
• 38:08
  Speaker 5: You should just It's like almost like anything, any feelings
• 38:12
  Speaker 5: or opinions they have about you is just not even part.
• 38:15
  Speaker 1: Of who you are, has nothing to do with if
• 38:17
  Speaker 1: you want to move through the.
• 38:17
  Speaker 5: World and move through your relationship with them just as
• 38:21
  Speaker 5: like a nice beacon of light, as like a joyful
• 38:23
  Speaker 5: reprieve from the rest of their life, so that they're
• 38:26
  Speaker 5: slowly understanding that you're just like anybody else, that you're
• 38:30
  Speaker 5: a real person with real feelings and real emotions and
• 38:34
  Speaker 5: without an agenda, you know what I mean. But really
• 38:37
  Speaker 5: don't get stuck on what they're saying or what their
• 38:39
  Speaker 5: attitudes are, as long as it's not hurtful or sorry
• 38:43
  Speaker 5: not maybe it's hurtful, of course, but you know, as
• 38:45
  Speaker 5: long as it's not abusive or they're treating you in
• 38:49
  Speaker 5: an unkind way, just keep pushing through, because I think
• 38:52
  Speaker 5: you should carry with you like you're speaking for lots.
• 38:56
  Speaker 1: Of trans people.
• 38:57
  Speaker 5: You know, your interactions with them or emblematic of all
• 39:01
  Speaker 5: the trans people.
• 39:02
  Speaker 1: In your community. So unfortunately, keep that in mind.
• 39:06
  Speaker 5: But I find that rather than having that be some
• 39:08
  Speaker 5: sort of onus, though it kind of gives you a
• 39:10
  Speaker 5: sense of purpose.
• 39:12
  Speaker 2: It's but by the way, you don't have to do
• 39:13
  Speaker 2: anything extra. But you're their son in law. You know
• 39:16
  Speaker 2: what son in laws do. They call up they're like, hey,
• 39:18
  Speaker 2: you need to borrow a ladder. Like you're their son
• 39:20
  Speaker 2: in law. So like, and the good news is you
• 39:22
  Speaker 2: don't have to worry about anything because like, men don't
• 39:24
  Speaker 2: do anything.
• 39:24
  Speaker 1: Do you have a ladder?
• 39:26
  Speaker 8: I have a step ladder.
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: No, you're a brown man, Go get you a ladder.
• 39:30
  Speaker 1: I think you need to get a real ladder.
• 39:32
  Speaker 8: I just so I don't need ladder.
• 39:35
  Speaker 5: Okay, well, then hire someone to bring them a ladder.
• 39:37
  Speaker 5: I think that's what Eliza's saying.
• 39:39
  Speaker 2: Or next time you go to the house, start knocking
• 39:40
  Speaker 2: on studs and be like, this is a solid wall.
• 39:43
  Speaker 2: Just start trying to fix things in their house, Be like,
• 39:45
  Speaker 2: can we readjust this door, bring a level, just start
• 39:50
  Speaker 2: seeing if everything's just start critiquing all the masculine stuff.
• 39:53
  Speaker 3: And then you take the stud finder and you put
• 39:55
  Speaker 3: it to your own chest and you're like, found.
• 39:56
  Speaker 7: Well that's literally what I can do.
• 40:00
  Speaker 1: Okay, Well, I mean that's one step in the right direction.
• 40:05
  Speaker 5: Yeah, are you guys, I have a question for you.
• 40:07
  Speaker 5: Are you guys affectionate in front of her family?
• 40:09
  Speaker 8: We don't hide it.
• 40:10
  Speaker 7: We don't like make it something that we try to
• 40:14
  Speaker 7: hide or flaunt it and like we're not trying to
• 40:16
  Speaker 7: do something that's not us.
• 40:18
  Speaker 6: At the same time, this holiday season, it's time to
• 40:20
  Speaker 6: amp it up.
• 40:21
  Speaker 1: And the holidays are right around the corner because we're
• 40:23
  Speaker 1: in March.
• 40:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so time to prepare a lot of caressing, a
• 40:30
  Speaker 2: lot of neck kissing.
• 40:32
  Speaker 1: Just let him know on the ladder. You want to
• 40:34
  Speaker 1: do all of this on the ladder.
• 40:36
  Speaker 7: While critiquing everything.
• 40:37
  Speaker 1: Right, yes, yeah, just be a man.
• 40:40
  Speaker 5: But you know what we're saying, right, You got what
• 40:42
  Speaker 5: we're saying, Blake.
• 40:43
  Speaker 8: With all of.
• 40:44
  Speaker 7: The toxic masculine going around on the news right now,
• 40:46
  Speaker 7: I think I can convey.
• 40:48
  Speaker 5: Some of that.
• 40:49
  Speaker 1: Thank you. That's what this is the answer. Want make
• 40:53
  Speaker 1: Ontario great again.
• 40:55
  Speaker 7: You know what, Canada might be the best state if
• 40:59
  Speaker 7: it happens.
• 40:59
  Speaker 6: Guys, welcome, Welcome number fifty one.
• 41:03
  Speaker 8: Don't worry.
• 41:04
  Speaker 7: Chelsea already has a place here, so it's not even
• 41:06
  Speaker 7: like she really has to do.
• 41:07
  Speaker 5: It's not like I'm even emmigrating. I'm just like going
• 41:10
  Speaker 5: from the Canadian passport. I don't I have a house
• 41:13
  Speaker 5: in Whistler, Canada, but I don't have a pass if.
• 41:15
  Speaker 1: She won't need one.
• 41:16
  Speaker 5: But I am marry yeah if I have to, but
• 41:18
  Speaker 5: I don't need to marry a Canadian.
• 41:20
  Speaker 7: No.
• 41:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 41:20
  Speaker 5: Everyone was always like before the election was like, oh,
• 41:23
  Speaker 5: you could just move to Canada. I'm like, I have
• 41:24
  Speaker 5: a feeling he probably thinks he's getting to invade Canada
• 41:28
  Speaker 5: and take Canada over.
• 41:29
  Speaker 1: Like Canada is not far enough away.
• 41:32
  Speaker 7: I don't think he can get that can up north.
• 41:36
  Speaker 6: You get it here.
• 41:36
  Speaker 1: It's a little tan, it's from a.
• 41:38
  Speaker 8: Bottle, That's what I mean.
• 41:39
  Speaker 7: But we don't sell it here, so.
• 41:41
  Speaker 8: I don't know.
• 41:41
  Speaker 2: Well, especially if it's American maid, you won't be RP
• 41:43
  Speaker 2: Tito's Vodko.
• 41:45
  Speaker 5: Sorry about that anyway, Blake, good luck with everything.
• 41:48
  Speaker 8: Congrats, thank you so much.
• 41:50
  Speaker 1: Congrats on your relationship.
• 41:51
  Speaker 5: And I think you're gonna I think you're actually gonna
• 41:54
  Speaker 5: be a great example for your in laws and that
• 41:56
  Speaker 5: whole family to you know, open minds and expand horizons.
• 42:01
  Speaker 8: Well, thank you. I appreciate everything.
• 42:03
  Speaker 5: Guys. Okay, thanks Mike. It was just taking a bite
• 42:07
  Speaker 5: of that. It was like calling my name, all.
• 42:09
  Speaker 1: Right, onto our next Blake. Oh, this is Blake.
• 42:11
  Speaker 3: Back to back black, back to back Blakes. So our
• 42:15
  Speaker 3: next Blake is twenty eight. He's here in La. He says,
• 42:19
  Speaker 3: Dear Chelsea, I need some big sister energy, and who
• 42:22
  Speaker 3: better than you. After over a decade of producing unscripted
• 42:25
  Speaker 3: content spanning editorial TV commercials, presidential campaigns, and the wild
• 42:30
  Speaker 3: West of social media, I'm ready for a change. I've
• 42:33
  Speaker 3: worked for iconic brands across the Conde Nash portfolio, produced
• 42:37
  Speaker 3: for Hillary Clinton and Stacy Abrams, and even helped Applebee's
• 42:40
  Speaker 3: snag a can Lions.
• 42:42
  Speaker 1: Fancas LinkedIn bio. Seriously, I mean, you know to backbar.
• 42:48
  Speaker 3: But despite all this, I've hit a wall of unfulfillment.
• 42:51
  Speaker 3: After layoff in NYC, I moved back to LA and
• 42:54
  Speaker 3: landed a job in programming management at a live streaming giant.
• 42:58
  Speaker 3: While I'm grateful, I've realized I want to return to
• 43:00
  Speaker 3: my first love, producing, specifically in scripted TV. Qua Mentor's advice,
• 43:05
  Speaker 3: if you can't find the project, create it. So I
• 43:08
  Speaker 3: started writing work that began as a cathartic way to
• 43:11
  Speaker 3: process a breakup. Yes, I Taylor swifted the shit out
• 43:13
  Speaker 3: of it and reflect on chaotic work situationships. Imagine a
• 43:17
  Speaker 3: flirtatious gay CEO in advertising harder than it sounds, has
• 43:22
  Speaker 3: turned into something I'm genuinely proud of. I've drafted two stories,
• 43:25
  Speaker 3: one rooted in rogate emotions, the other dripping in jewey
• 43:28
  Speaker 3: high camp, and I've shocked myself by how much I
• 43:31
  Speaker 3: love this creative outlet.
• 43:33
  Speaker 1: Here's where I need your advice.
• 43:34
  Speaker 3: I feel this poll to pursue writing and producing scripted
• 43:37
  Speaker 3: TV full time, but the thought of freelancing and giving
• 43:40
  Speaker 3: up financial stability Hello student loans terrifies me. Everyone in
• 43:44
  Speaker 3: LA seems to have advice, but now I'm stuck in
• 43:46
  Speaker 3: analysis paralysis. How do I take the next right sized
• 43:50
  Speaker 3: step toward a career I'm passionate about without losing myself
• 43:53
  Speaker 3: in the process. How do I balance humility, creative ambition,
• 43:57
  Speaker 3: and the rent checks with love and kindness?
• 44:00
  Speaker 6: Blake?
• 44:00
  Speaker 1: Hi Blake? Hello, Hello, Hi Blake Blake.
• 44:04
  Speaker 5: Eliza, do you want to take this? This is our
• 44:06
  Speaker 5: special guest Eliza Slessinger.
• 44:08
  Speaker 8: Hello, Hello, I'm very familiar.
• 44:11
  Speaker 1: Was that good?
• 44:12
  Speaker 8: No, in a good way? In a very good way.
• 44:14
  Speaker 2: I mean, I am no stranger to the analysis paralysis,
• 44:19
  Speaker 2: but also the actual act of putting one foot in
• 44:22
  Speaker 2: front of the other. And it's tough because you got
• 44:25
  Speaker 2: a taste of normalcy with a steady paycheck, and.
• 44:29
  Speaker 6: You're like, oh, look, how cozy this is.
• 44:31
  Speaker 2: If you were just an artist from the start and
• 44:33
  Speaker 2: you were used to flying by the seat of your pants,
• 44:35
  Speaker 2: then that would be very comfortable for you. I am that,
• 44:37
  Speaker 2: Like I am a freelance person, right, these are the
• 44:40
  Speaker 2: things that I do. I don't have that backup job.
• 44:42
  Speaker 2: The answer is, you're just going to have to do both.
• 44:46
  Speaker 2: You're just going to have to be exhausted. And the
• 44:48
  Speaker 2: question that I can't answer for you is will you
• 44:51
  Speaker 2: be okay being not artistically fulfilled in this life if
• 44:56
  Speaker 2: your creature comforts outweigh that some people are. For me,
• 45:00
  Speaker 2: it is paramount, But some people can live that way.
• 45:05
  Speaker 2: And are you willing to keep that job so you
• 45:07
  Speaker 2: can keep your lights on and then just write at
• 45:09
  Speaker 2: night and just hustle and have two jobs until one
• 45:12
  Speaker 2: edges out.
• 45:12
  Speaker 9: The other short answer is yeah. So, like for me,
• 45:15
  Speaker 9: I originally moved away from LA to go to New
• 45:18
  Speaker 9: York because I at my core am a hustler. And
• 45:21
  Speaker 9: so while I was doing a lot of those other projects,
• 45:25
  Speaker 9: like I always had a full time job, and like
• 45:27
  Speaker 9: I was able to freelance and sort of navigate it.
• 45:30
  Speaker 9: And what happened to me is I got a job
• 45:33
  Speaker 9: and got a really nice salary. I was still living
• 45:36
  Speaker 9: paycheck to paycheck at the time because New York was
• 45:38
  Speaker 9: just crazy, but I didn't freelance anymore. And then when
• 45:42
  Speaker 9: I had the layoff happen, it just shook everything up
• 45:45
  Speaker 9: and terrified me. And now I'm back in a place
• 45:48
  Speaker 9: where I have a full time job again. I came
• 45:50
  Speaker 9: back to LA and I'm really sort of leaning into
• 45:54
  Speaker 9: this creative outlet that I really love, but I don't
• 45:58
  Speaker 9: have side hustles, and that's kind of where I'm like,
• 46:02
  Speaker 9: I know I need to get back into the side hustles,
• 46:04
  Speaker 9: but sort of writing has taken the spot of what
• 46:07
  Speaker 9: that would be because I'm doing it at night.
• 46:09
  Speaker 8: I'm doing it on my lunch breaks at my full
• 46:11
  Speaker 8: time job.
• 46:12
  Speaker 2: Is it you're writing a scripted show. There's only two
• 46:14
  Speaker 2: scripted shows.
• 46:15
  Speaker 8: Yeah, two scripted shows right now.
• 46:17
  Speaker 2: Well, all you have to do is create those and
• 46:19
  Speaker 2: then it's about just getting somebody to read it. Like,
• 46:22
  Speaker 2: you're not a showrunner, you're not producing these things. So
• 46:25
  Speaker 2: if you've done that, the next step is connecting it
• 46:28
  Speaker 2: to the right people, and then the idea is that
• 46:31
  Speaker 2: that gets made so you can leave your other job.
• 46:33
  Speaker 6: But it sounds like you're already doing both of them.
• 46:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean that's what I'm getting from you.
• 46:37
  Speaker 5: You're doing all of it, and I mean I think
• 46:39
  Speaker 5: you're looking for like a way out of doing all
• 46:42
  Speaker 5: of it together, like some sort of jackpot.
• 46:44
  Speaker 1: The truth of the matter is that you do have
• 46:46
  Speaker 1: to fucking hustle.
• 46:47
  Speaker 5: You do, and it's brutal sometimes, but like it is
• 46:50
  Speaker 5: a means to an end, it does pay off. So
• 46:53
  Speaker 5: while it might not be like the most glamorous part
• 46:56
  Speaker 5: of your life right now, it deserves your focus and
• 46:59
  Speaker 5: attention so that it can become your source of income
• 47:02
  Speaker 5: as well.
• 47:02
  Speaker 2: But also, I mean, yes, and it has to be
• 47:06
  Speaker 2: something that like, and it sounds like it is like
• 47:08
  Speaker 2: you can't live without it. Like I wrote a movie
• 47:12
  Speaker 2: that's on Netflix called Good on Paper, and that movie
• 47:14
  Speaker 2: is something that I wrote every time I didn't get
• 47:17
  Speaker 2: the audition, every time I had an off night and
• 47:20
  Speaker 2: I didn't have sets when I could have been going
• 47:22
  Speaker 2: out but I didn't, like, I always returned to that document.
• 47:25
  Speaker 2: And the good news is you have that fire in you.
• 47:28
  Speaker 2: But I'm gonna tell you right now. And it seems
• 47:30
  Speaker 2: to happen for everyone but me. There is no moment
• 47:33
  Speaker 2: where they knock and they're like, hey, we're making it.
• 47:36
  Speaker 2: You will submit this, Hey, we'll read it next week. Okay,
• 47:39
  Speaker 2: it's in three weeks. Oh the executive got sick. Oh
• 47:42
  Speaker 2: she had a baby, and then they'll pick it up.
• 47:44
  Speaker 2: But we're gonna do it in the summer. Okay, Well,
• 47:46
  Speaker 2: it's actually gonna be for digital.
• 47:47
  Speaker 1: Like you have to.
• 47:48
  Speaker 2: Become so accustomed to just eating shit for breakfast, because
• 47:52
  Speaker 2: these things take forever. I just took a blind script
• 47:56
  Speaker 2: deal with a major network that took eight months. I'm sorry,
• 47:59
  Speaker 2: I didn't take eight months to even get the deal,
• 48:01
  Speaker 2: and in the end we didn't take it because it
• 48:03
  Speaker 2: was so about eight months just to make a deal
• 48:06
  Speaker 2: for a show I hadn't created.
• 48:07
  Speaker 1: So I'm just letting make a deal for a show
• 48:09
  Speaker 1: you had not created, hadn't created.
• 48:11
  Speaker 2: It was a blind script deal, and in the end
• 48:12
  Speaker 2: we didn't take it. It is such a slog So you
• 48:15
  Speaker 2: have to be so in love with your characters and
• 48:18
  Speaker 2: your process, and then you have to be okay with
• 48:20
  Speaker 2: them dying when someone buys this and it sits on
• 48:22
  Speaker 2: a shelf.
• 48:23
  Speaker 1: You have to love the process so much.
• 48:25
  Speaker 9: Yeah, And that's kind of where I think I felt
• 48:28
  Speaker 9: inspired to write in because like, I, actually I'm loving
• 48:31
  Speaker 9: this process. I never thought like I wanted to get
• 48:33
  Speaker 9: into scripted, but that was kind of elusive. And then
• 48:36
  Speaker 9: I had a mentor to just be like, then just
• 48:38
  Speaker 9: go write it, and it seems so simple, and I
• 48:41
  Speaker 9: actually fell in love with the writing process and it
• 48:44
  Speaker 9: became really great. And then you know, I was so
• 48:46
  Speaker 9: consumed by one project that I started another, And now
• 48:49
  Speaker 9: I have these two projects that are just kind of
• 48:51
  Speaker 9: building and it's been really fun and exciting, but you know,
• 48:55
  Speaker 9: I do kind of want to pivot into this and
• 48:57
  Speaker 9: it sort of became like this thing of fear where
• 48:59
  Speaker 9: I'm like, oh, I actually have to like now continue
• 49:02
  Speaker 9: to push this onward and stuff. But I think the
• 49:06
  Speaker 9: fear is sort of coming from like feeling like I'm
• 49:09
  Speaker 9: being consumed by just making it all happen and doing
• 49:12
  Speaker 9: the hustle and doing everything, which isn't something that I'm
• 49:15
  Speaker 9: necessarily foreign to.
• 49:17
  Speaker 1: It's not it doesn't sound like fear to me.
• 49:19
  Speaker 2: It sounds like anxiety because you're wanting it all to
• 49:23
  Speaker 2: happen and I get it like all at once right now,
• 49:25
  Speaker 2: But there's actually very little to be done once you've
• 49:28
  Speaker 2: written it, and it's going to be sending these emails
• 49:31
  Speaker 2: like there's actually nothing to fear here because nothing is happening.
• 49:35
  Speaker 6: You don't have to leave that job yet. What you
• 49:37
  Speaker 6: are is bored.
• 49:38
  Speaker 2: You're like, I'm ready to go, and this industry is
• 49:41
  Speaker 2: moved so slowly.
• 49:42
  Speaker 6: So the hardest thing to do is nothing. And that's
• 49:45
  Speaker 6: what's happening right now.
• 49:46
  Speaker 2: You've got to go to work, polish your draft, make
• 49:48
  Speaker 2: sure that when it's sent, it's the best version. Don't
• 49:51
  Speaker 2: just fire it off. And I'm the worst at that,
• 49:53
  Speaker 2: Like I will send a network draft with typos like
• 49:55
  Speaker 2: I don't even I didn't prove read my college essays.
• 49:58
  Speaker 2: It's just slow. And that's the hardest part is remembering
• 50:01
  Speaker 2: to live your life while your dreams like slowly start
• 50:05
  Speaker 2: to take off.
• 50:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 50:07
  Speaker 3: Sean Hayes once gave a piece of advice that was
• 50:10
  Speaker 3: like he for himself when he was coming up. He said,
• 50:13
  Speaker 3: and I think he actually still does this, but do
• 50:15
  Speaker 3: one thing every day that's like toward the career you
• 50:18
  Speaker 3: want to have. So like you feel like oh, I
• 50:20
  Speaker 3: got to be taking meaning is I gotta be doing
• 50:21
  Speaker 3: doing all these things. Even if every day you do
• 50:23
  Speaker 3: one thing that's advancing your career or one contact, you're
• 50:27
  Speaker 3: still making progress.
• 50:29
  Speaker 2: The biggest mistake you can make is thinking other people
• 50:32
  Speaker 2: are working for you, and then you find out that
• 50:35
  Speaker 2: they're not read the trades. Find the executive at the streamer,
• 50:38
  Speaker 2: what's your dream network? How do you get to that person?
• 50:41
  Speaker 2: Who can you befriend that could read that? Do you
• 50:43
  Speaker 2: have a rep?
• 50:44
  Speaker 1: Do you have reps?
• 50:45
  Speaker 8: No? I don't.
• 50:45
  Speaker 1: That's the other you got to get that rep.
• 50:47
  Speaker 9: I've always been in house, Like when I was at Conde,
• 50:49
  Speaker 9: I was in house and advertising and so like when
• 50:53
  Speaker 9: I was freelance saying, it was just me getting tapped
• 50:55
  Speaker 9: by people within my network.
• 50:57
  Speaker 8: But I've never had a REP.
• 50:58
  Speaker 9: And I got invite earlier on that was sort of like,
• 51:01
  Speaker 9: you know, you don't really need a REP if you
• 51:03
  Speaker 9: don't have anything to be wrapped. But now I'm sort
• 51:05
  Speaker 9: of at a spot where I'm like, is this the
• 51:08
  Speaker 9: tipping point or do I need to actually get get now?
• 51:10
  Speaker 5: This is how you get representation with the material that
• 51:12
  Speaker 5: you have. The material written is so far and there
• 51:15
  Speaker 5: is something that separates people who succeed in this business
• 51:17
  Speaker 5: and people that don't. And I think you're at the
• 51:20
  Speaker 5: crescendo of that, or at the tipping point of that.
• 51:23
  Speaker 5: I should say, you got to just keep fucking chugging away.
• 51:26
  Speaker 5: Like it is hard, it is arduous, it's all of
• 51:29
  Speaker 5: those things. But that's what separates people from being successful in.
• 51:32
  Speaker 1: This industry and people who aren't is.
• 51:35
  Speaker 5: The people that give up at this point or it's.
• 51:37
  Speaker 1: Like overwhelmed, or I don't know what to do next.
• 51:39
  Speaker 1: It's like no one's coming to save you.
• 51:41
  Speaker 6: Yeah, what's your next step?
• 51:43
  Speaker 1: You have two scripts?
• 51:44
  Speaker 8: So I have two concepts. I'm starting to script them
• 51:46
  Speaker 8: right now.
• 51:47
  Speaker 1: Because some people won't want you to do that.
• 51:49
  Speaker 2: There's nothing wrong with having a script in your back pocket,
• 51:52
  Speaker 2: and you need a concept is very hard to sell
• 51:55
  Speaker 2: if it's not packaged.
• 51:56
  Speaker 1: So right now, it's just you.
• 51:58
  Speaker 2: If you were if you walked in and you're like,
• 52:00
  Speaker 2: I've got these three pieces of talent attached and someone
• 52:02
  Speaker 2: loves it. Nobody wants that have that script, and maybe
• 52:05
  Speaker 2: you show it to maybe you don't, but at least
• 52:07
  Speaker 2: you can show it to your rep.
• 52:08
  Speaker 6: Like you need proof of concept.
• 52:10
  Speaker 9: If it's a scripted No, it is scripted for sure.
• 52:14
  Speaker 9: One of the thriller drama. One of them is the
• 52:16
  Speaker 9: drama d so.
• 52:17
  Speaker 1: I think they're hour long.
• 52:18
  Speaker 8: Both of them are eight episodes one hour each per season.
• 52:21
  Speaker 6: Not only do you need the script, I mean you can.
• 52:23
  Speaker 6: You can do a pitch.
• 52:24
  Speaker 2: Some people for a pitch, but this pitch needs to
• 52:26
  Speaker 2: be like you need a one sheet, you need a
• 52:29
  Speaker 2: pitch deck, and you need these things to be like grabbable.
• 52:31
  Speaker 2: And I would ask someone you know who's a writer
• 52:34
  Speaker 2: for other examples of a pitch deck. Unless you already
• 52:37
  Speaker 2: have that. It's the hardest part. I always find it's
• 52:39
  Speaker 2: easier to just write the script. I hate pitching. It's
• 52:42
  Speaker 2: a great way to have people tell you to fuck off.
• 52:45
  Speaker 2: But you should be writing the script. Were you planning
• 52:47
  Speaker 2: on writing it?
• 52:48
  Speaker 8: Yeah, I was planning on writing it.
• 52:49
  Speaker 9: I sort of was getting into like putting the pitch
• 52:52
  Speaker 9: material and series bible together, and then I've been getting
• 52:56
  Speaker 9: feedback and people are like, oh, you sort of just
• 52:58
  Speaker 9: need more of a script this as well.
• 53:00
  Speaker 2: You should just write the script because it is in
• 53:02
  Speaker 2: that script that you will find all the problems. Have
• 53:04
  Speaker 2: people read it, have people you trust not your friend.
• 53:07
  Speaker 2: But like real writers, read it, rewrite it, rewrite it,
• 53:10
  Speaker 2: get it to a place where you think it's bulletproof,
• 53:12
  Speaker 2: then give it to your rep who will give you
• 53:15
  Speaker 2: their critiques, and then you go from there. But you
• 53:18
  Speaker 2: got to you have to actually write it. Otherwise you're
• 53:20
  Speaker 2: just a person who says that they're a writer.
• 53:22
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 53:22
  Speaker 9: I don't call myself a writer, if any I know,
• 53:24
  Speaker 9: I'm a producer, and I think that's been like the
• 53:25
  Speaker 9: other hesitation is like I've done producaying, I've directed a
• 53:29
  Speaker 9: little bit, but like writing is like very I haven't
• 53:32
  Speaker 9: done it since college, and like this is like actually
• 53:35
  Speaker 9: something that I'm finding them falling in love with.
• 53:38
  Speaker 1: Enjoy it, enjoy falling in love with it. Thank god
• 53:40
  Speaker 1: Eliza was here today. She's giving you great advice.
• 53:43
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I can't tell you that I've read Saved the
• 53:45
  Speaker 2: Cat in a long time their Screenwriter podcast. Like, write
• 53:48
  Speaker 2: it and then you'll rewrite it and then step away
• 53:52
  Speaker 2: write it again. Then you can get your agent can't
• 53:55
  Speaker 2: represent you unless they have something to actually read. Otherwise
• 53:59
  Speaker 2: it's just like a fun concept. Nobody really wants to
• 54:00
  Speaker 2: read a Bible. That's fair enough, any kind of Bible heard.
• 54:06
  Speaker 8: He herd.
• 54:07
  Speaker 5: Okay, well thanks for calling in. I mean that's some
• 54:10
  Speaker 5: good advice. So good luck with everything, beautiful.
• 54:13
  Speaker 8: Thank you all so much.
• 54:14
  Speaker 3: Check back in in like six months, Blake, Okay, yeah,
• 54:16
  Speaker 3: let us.
• 54:16
  Speaker 2: Know how you're doing from your mansion after you sold
• 54:19
  Speaker 2: the show.
• 54:20
  Speaker 1: And I'm jealous.
• 54:21
  Speaker 8: I wish so awesome. Thank you all so much. I
• 54:23
  Speaker 8: appreciate it.
• 54:24
  Speaker 1: Bye bye bye. It's such a it's such a brutal.
• 54:30
  Speaker 5: I'm like with career stuff, I'm like, I don't fucking
• 54:33
  Speaker 5: know what to tell you. I don't really know. Let's
• 54:35
  Speaker 5: put one foot front of it. Like all I can
• 54:37
  Speaker 5: say is hustle, hustle, hustle. But it's like that was
• 54:40
  Speaker 5: good too because it got into specifics.
• 54:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's and it's like it's a super granular thing.
• 54:44
  Speaker 2: But like that's what's so great about stand up is
• 54:46
  Speaker 2: like just go up, just go You don't need someone
• 54:49
  Speaker 2: to okay it, No one has to, Like you can
• 54:50
  Speaker 2: just you can create it every night. The writing is tough,
• 54:53
  Speaker 2: but plenty of show creators like we're like Mark Platt
• 54:57
  Speaker 2: was like a lawyer and then he created shows. Like
• 55:01
  Speaker 2: a lot of people just start as something else and
• 55:03
  Speaker 2: just move into writing so it can be done.
• 55:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's just hard. Let's take a quick break and
• 55:09
  Speaker 1: I have a little wrap up question.
• 55:10
  Speaker 5: Great, we'll be right back with Eliza. I keep saying, Blessinger.
• 55:15
  Speaker 5: We'll be right back with Eliza Schlessinger.
• 55:17
  Speaker 1: Is hands blessing ger?
• 55:19
  Speaker 7: Is it?
• 55:20
  Speaker 1: Girl? Yeah? I've been saying Eliza Slessinger.
• 55:23
  Speaker 8: I know.
• 55:23
  Speaker 1: I'm so sorry. Everybody does.
• 55:25
  Speaker 5: Oh my god, it's Eliza Slessinger. Everybody, it's Eliza Schlessinger.
• 55:30
  Speaker 1: There you go.
• 55:31
  Speaker 5: Now you're Jewish Eliza Schlessinger.
• 55:33
  Speaker 1: I'm so sorry. Isn't it so much better that way? Yeah?
• 55:36
  Speaker 5: It is Schlessing jer Nope, test and we're back with
• 55:47
  Speaker 5: Eliza schlessen Ger.
• 55:49
  Speaker 1: There you go.
• 55:50
  Speaker 6: That's totally the way to do it, with a pause
• 55:51
  Speaker 6: in the middle.
• 55:52
  Speaker 1: I like it like a hyphen emphasis. Yeah, not an
• 55:55
  Speaker 1: umlaut a hyphen. I wish. I wish I came from
• 55:58
  Speaker 1: a culture that anti umloud. Oh we are I think so,
• 56:01
  Speaker 1: I don't know. We love getting canceled.
• 56:03
  Speaker 3: This writer says, Dear Chelsea, my ninety seven year old
• 56:07
  Speaker 3: neighbor of six years who is thriving, calls me Kimberly.
• 56:11
  Speaker 3: My name is Kendall. Do I tell her xoxo, Kendall.
• 56:15
  Speaker 5: No, no, no, no, just tell her your name is
• 56:18
  Speaker 5: Eliza Schlessinger.
• 56:19
  Speaker 1: And she'll have an aneurysm trying to pronounce it.
• 56:22
  Speaker 3: No.
• 56:22
  Speaker 5: I love that she calls you the wrong name. That's fun,
• 56:25
  Speaker 5: have fun with it.
• 56:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah, what's to be gained?
• 56:28
  Speaker 6: How much longer could she possibly be calling you by
• 56:31
  Speaker 6: this name?
• 56:33
  Speaker 1: Okay, Eliza?
• 56:34
  Speaker 5: Everybody can watch Eliza Schlessinger's news special. It's on Amazon Prime, okay,
• 56:40
  Speaker 5: and it's called a Different Animal. And if you need
• 56:42
  Speaker 5: to know more about her, go to her Instagram, go
• 56:45
  Speaker 5: to her Facebook.
• 56:46
  Speaker 1: Are you still on Facebook? Probably? I mean I only
• 56:49
  Speaker 1: I don't even know how to get on face.
• 56:50
  Speaker 6: I don't have my password. Can I plug my podcast?
• 56:53
  Speaker 2: Because it's absolutely producer and co hosts always like you
• 56:56
  Speaker 2: need to tell people you have a podcast. It's called
• 56:58
  Speaker 2: Ask Eliza Anything. And the time this comes out, we
• 57:01
  Speaker 2: will have our new home on Lemonada, and I do
• 57:04
  Speaker 2: what we do here is I the audience is the guest.
• 57:07
  Speaker 2: So we do we have life advice?
• 57:09
  Speaker 1: Perfect? Oh god, how funny? Yeah? So Askalize Anything? Okay,
• 57:13
  Speaker 1: out love it? Thank you Eliza, thanks for having me. Chlsea,
• 57:16
  Speaker 1: thank you you do Do Do Do Do.
• 57:19
  Speaker 5: Do drum roll Catherine, please, Chelsea Handler Abroad. Abroad is
• 57:26
  Speaker 5: my European tour, which I just announced. Tickets go on
• 57:29
  Speaker 5: sale tomorrow or today or there's a pre sale code, Chelsea.
• 57:34
  Speaker 1: So I'm coming to.
• 57:37
  Speaker 5: Obviously find a husband abroad. I need to get the
• 57:40
  Speaker 5: health out of this fucking country. And it's not as
• 57:43
  Speaker 5: easy as you think. So I'm coming to Rekuvik. I'm
• 57:47
  Speaker 5: coming to Dublin. I'm coming to the UK. I'm coming
• 57:51
  Speaker 5: to Brussels, Paris, Belfast.
• 57:53
  Speaker 1: In May and June.
• 57:55
  Speaker 5: I'm coming to Oslo, Stockholm, to Copenhagen, Manchester, London, Glasgow,
• 58:00
  Speaker 5: New Zurich, Vienna.
• 58:02
  Speaker 1: I've never ever.
• 58:03
  Speaker 5: Been to Vienna, Berlin, Barcelona, and Lisbon. I'm coming abroad
• 58:10
  Speaker 5: is abroad that.
• 58:11
  Speaker 1: Sounds like fun. I'm gonna go see you abroad. I
• 58:13
  Speaker 1: ride out.
• 58:14
  Speaker 5: I want to go see me abroad and there all
• 58:16
  Speaker 5: be there, All be fun, okay, all Upcoming Vegas dates
• 58:21
  Speaker 5: March twenty first, April eighteenth, July fifth, August thirtieth, November
• 58:25
  Speaker 5: one and twenty ninth at the Cosmopolitan of Las Vegas.
• 58:30
  Speaker 3: If you'd like advice from Chelsea, shoot us an email
• 58:32
  Speaker 3: at Dear Chelsea podcast at gmail dot com and be
• 58:35
  Speaker 3: sure to include your phone number. Dear Chelsea is edited
• 58:38
  Speaker 3: and engineered by Brad Dickert executive producer Catherine Law and
• 58:42
  Speaker 3: be sure to check out our merch at Chelseahandler dot
• 58:44
  Speaker 3: com