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HOW TO CATCH YOUR MAN RED-HANDED!!!! · Relatables

0:00
Speaker 1: Coming up on Relatables.
0:01
Speaker 2: If you were in a dark room with a hundred
0:04
Speaker 2: other girls and your girlfriend was in there, would you
0:05
Speaker 2: be able to tell which one is your girlfriend?
0:08
Speaker 1: It's just no question, no no, no, no, no, no answer
0:11
Speaker 1: to this. Look at you go, look at you go. Relatable.
0:29
Speaker 1: The Relatables podcast is hosted by myself, Jake Craig aka
0:35
Speaker 1: Daddy that's right, and my partner in crime. What do
0:38
Speaker 1: your Clark aka mummy, Jake's leader Okay, Jake's leader, Jake's
0:43
Speaker 1: idol akay, Jack's role model? And life that's right? A rightio?
0:51
Speaker 1: But today if you life? Whatever makes you happy today? Jake?
0:56
Speaker 1: What did we want to start the episode with? We're
0:59
Speaker 1: going to play make the We're gonna do it again.
1:01
Speaker 3: We're back.
1:02
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna lie like it gets.
1:04
Speaker 2: I'm nervous every time, no matter what. And I'm so nervous.
1:07
Speaker 2: How I have to poop?
1:08
Speaker 1: You have to poop. This is the segment where we
1:10
Speaker 1: call a listener and tell them they've won a hat,
1:13
Speaker 1: but if we make them say the word from the
1:15
Speaker 1: random word generator, they no longer win the hat. What
1:19
Speaker 1: word is it this week? Quality? Fuck? Okay? Hey, we
1:24
Speaker 1: see how we go quality quality ship.
1:28
Speaker 2: When we know the word, it makes it so much worse.
1:30
Speaker 2: And we're actually playing it this week. Last week I
1:32
Speaker 2: think we just gave it hadaway.
1:33
Speaker 1: Yeah, so quality quality. How can we get this? We
1:36
Speaker 1: had a game plan. We need game plans. Yeah, we're
1:38
Speaker 1: calling someone named Jessica. The contestant is Jessica. Oh, let's
1:42
Speaker 1: talk about the hoodies. Ask about yeah, that little conversation. Yeah,
1:48
Speaker 1: you know, did you get a hoodie? Yeah? Okay, ready
1:51
Speaker 1: to go for it.
1:54
Speaker 4: Hello.
1:55
Speaker 1: Hello, it's Adie and Jake from the Relatables. How's it going? Oh? Good? Hi?
1:59
Speaker 4: How are you guys? Good?
2:00
Speaker 1: Thanks to this Jessica? It is Oh god, we are
2:04
Speaker 1: calling you to tell you you have won yourself a
2:07
Speaker 1: hot no way.
2:09
Speaker 4: Yes, literally not going to answer. So I was like,
2:12
Speaker 4: I don't know who that is?
2:13
Speaker 1: We thought that. I was like, oh, enough to call
2:15
Speaker 1: it twice. It definitely makes up. How's your day going anyway?
2:20
Speaker 4: I don't work. I'm a housekeeping supervisor, but I live.
2:26
Speaker 1: In Airly Beach house keeping. We love Airly Beach kind of.
2:29
Speaker 1: I saw a cannon veil on the thing. Yeah, we
2:31
Speaker 1: love it there.
2:32
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's so nice of here.
2:33
Speaker 1: What's the what's the brewery that we went to? Oh, well,
2:37
Speaker 1: I can't remember what that was. I think it's now
2:40
Speaker 1: Oh what damn?
2:43
Speaker 2: Okay, Well so you said you're a housekeeping supervisor. Yeah,
2:47
Speaker 2: so what is that in hotels?
2:50
Speaker 1: Oh? Housekeeping is in like you supervisor people that clean
2:53
Speaker 1: the rooms. Do you have to like maintain a certain
2:54
Speaker 1: standard at the cleaning place? Yeah?
2:59
Speaker 4: And I'm like a lot so before you check into
3:01
Speaker 4: a hotel, I'm the last person that like sees it.
3:04
Speaker 2: Oh, so you get to go check how like the
3:06
Speaker 2: cleaning service was before you go tick it off and
3:08
Speaker 2: say yeah, this is a good one.
3:10
Speaker 4: Yeah, pretty much.
3:11
Speaker 1: What's on what's on the checklist?
3:14
Speaker 4: It's just short. It's like you got to like pretend
3:17
Speaker 4: that if you will walking into a hotel that you'd
3:20
Speaker 4: like it.
3:20
Speaker 2: Okay, fair enough, So you just act like you're a consumer.
3:22
Speaker 2: It's like a paying customer.
3:23
Speaker 1: M that's good. Well back pretty much back to the hats.
3:26
Speaker 1: Which color would you like?
3:28
Speaker 4: What colors are there?
3:29
Speaker 1: They are blue and pink.
3:31
Speaker 4: Oh that's hard. I like both of those colors.
3:34
Speaker 1: One of them says. One of them says daddy on
3:37
Speaker 1: the brim, and one of them says mummy on the brim,
3:42
Speaker 1: I don't know, surprised me. Okay, easy fasy? Did you
3:46
Speaker 1: did you get a jumper at all?
3:47
Speaker 5: I don't think so.
3:49
Speaker 1: Oh well, thank you very much. We will send you
3:59
Speaker 1: that hat, send you it. Thank you, thanks for listening.
4:04
Speaker 1: That was disappointing. I was very disappointing. We tried. I
4:06
Speaker 1: was trying to get her to say quality control. Yeah, yeah,
4:09
Speaker 1: that's what I was because like the quality of cleaning.
4:11
Speaker 1: Yeah did you hang up? Yeah?
4:14
Speaker 3: Yeah.
4:15
Speaker 1: I was gonna say we lost, We lost, Okay, we've
4:20
Speaker 1: proven to be not great at this. Actually I think
4:22
Speaker 1: I think we could have done better. No, I think
4:24
Speaker 1: that word was too hot. You can't force someone to
4:26
Speaker 1: say quality like I was trying to.
4:28
Speaker 2: Definitely like I think there was a way to walk
4:30
Speaker 2: her into same quality control, like I I was gonna say,
4:34
Speaker 2: I was gonna say, we changed the topic. I was
4:36
Speaker 2: going to say, what sort of control is there, like
4:40
Speaker 2: like over this type of stuff, And I want her
4:41
Speaker 2: to say, oh, the quality control is this, But it
4:43
Speaker 2: just didn't come to my head.
4:44
Speaker 1: She would say quality control though we see. This is
4:46
Speaker 1: the thing about the game. It's like, did we try? Yeah?
4:48
Speaker 1: She win all the time. She doesn't even know she
4:52
Speaker 1: was playing you missed every shot, you don't takeever whatever.
4:54
Speaker 3: The quote is, alrighty oddie.
5:06
Speaker 1: I had a.
5:08
Speaker 3: Life changing and I.
5:10
Speaker 1: Hope this changes your life. Life change last night. Last night,
5:13
Speaker 1: I had a life changing moment. I like to call epiphanies. Mate. No, no,
5:16
Speaker 1: mine wasn't an epiphany. I got told this information. I
5:19
Speaker 1: didn't come up with this right. It was.
5:21
Speaker 2: I was on the phone with my girlfriend and we
5:24
Speaker 2: hung up. We actually hung up. I was like, I'm
5:26
Speaker 2: going to bed, good night, said it like that. I
5:28
Speaker 2: was like, go good funck, get on my sleepy time.
5:32
Speaker 2: She she sends me a voice message, and I issue
5:35
Speaker 2: I thought it was going to be something cute, like
5:38
Speaker 2: just saying good night.
5:40
Speaker 1: And I was like kind of like oh yeah. And
5:42
Speaker 1: then they were going, She's.
5:42
Speaker 2: Like, Jake, I just figured out something crazy.
5:46
Speaker 1: I was like, she sends me two voice messages, all right.
5:48
Speaker 2: I thought it was going to be about like some
5:50
Speaker 2: family thing or something. And then and then I was like,
5:54
Speaker 2: you don't leave me. Hang it like finish it off.
5:56
Speaker 1: So you know the freestyle race in the olympicswimming, like
6:01
Speaker 1: this is the fifty meter freestyle, one hundred meter freestyle.
6:05
Speaker 2: It's called freestyle because you can actually do whatever stroke
6:09
Speaker 2: you want.
6:10
Speaker 1: Oh, I vaguely knew that. Oh you knew that. I
6:12
Speaker 1: vaguely knew that. I had no idea. And everyone just
6:16
Speaker 1: does that stroke because it's the fastest. Yeah. Yeah, and
6:19
Speaker 1: so it's actually called the front crawl. Wait that that
6:24
Speaker 1: stroke that they do is not called freestyle. It's called
6:27
Speaker 1: the front crawl, but the synonym for it now is
6:29
Speaker 1: freestyle because that's just the one everyone chooses to do
6:32
Speaker 1: the quickest. Yeah. I vaguely remember hearing that in like
6:34
Speaker 1: a swimming carnival event, Like, ah.
6:36
Speaker 2: Shit, I thought I was about to change your life issues.
6:39
Speaker 2: To me, my world was rocked last night when I
6:41
Speaker 2: found that out. I was like, this is some serious
6:44
Speaker 2: life changing decision. Like the information, when are you going
6:46
Speaker 2: to use that information?
6:47
Speaker 1: You're like, who wants to go for a crawling? Cause?
6:51
Speaker 1: Is we're going to like what do we do a
6:53
Speaker 1: front crawlers? What's that?
6:54
Speaker 5: Like?
6:54
Speaker 1: Hey, you don't know what, but it was I was
7:01
Speaker 1: like what?
7:02
Speaker 2: And so I got me thinking why, Like, I know
7:04
Speaker 2: it's the fastest stroke, but does that mean that because
7:07
Speaker 2: breast sorry not breaststroke, backstroke you start in the pool. Yeah,
7:13
Speaker 2: And I think for me, backstroke is the quickest really
7:17
Speaker 2: free stufly I could easily yeah, ah right, like no
7:21
Speaker 2: one ever tries a different one. Yeah, it's because it's
7:24
Speaker 2: I think it's proven that it's the quickest, scientifically fair enough,
7:27
Speaker 2: the most upper body strength. But I wanted to touch
7:29
Speaker 2: back on the fact that that is such a girl
7:31
Speaker 2: thing to do right right there, So you say good night.
7:34
Speaker 1: You're expecting a cute message. That's what a guy would do.
7:36
Speaker 1: Send a little hey love you piogy right before you're
7:39
Speaker 1: going to bed. She's just making your mind think. She's like,
7:42
Speaker 1: I bet I just guess what I'm gonna spire with
7:45
Speaker 1: your brain right now?
7:48
Speaker 2: Fair enough, I will say, fair enough to that. But
7:52
Speaker 2: on the Olympic topic, what another bit of information? I
7:56
Speaker 2: was like, fuck it, I'll get this is the amount
7:58
Speaker 2: of money the fleets make for winning gold?
8:01
Speaker 1: Oh, actually want to live with this? Do you have
8:03
Speaker 1: the stats here?
8:03
Speaker 2: I got some stats, and I guess you can go
8:07
Speaker 2: for a bit of a guess if you want.
8:08
Speaker 1: Bronze, silver, gold, just gold. I've got his gold and
8:12
Speaker 1: they've gone on this website. They did it to the
8:14
Speaker 1: US dollars and just rounded to the nearest dollar. So
8:17
Speaker 1: here we go.
8:17
Speaker 2: But let's go with so for the Olympics, this is
8:21
Speaker 2: what the athletes get paid by their country.
8:24
Speaker 1: Yeah, Hong Kong gold medal? What are you thinking, Hong Kong?
8:28
Speaker 1: But it's different country. Every country pays. Hong Kong would
8:31
Speaker 1: pay good. Ay, like forty five forty five what USD thousand,
8:35
Speaker 1: forty five thousand USD seven hundred and sixty eight thousand
8:39
Speaker 1: USD seven hundred and sixty eight thousand USD. Yeah, bro,
8:44
Speaker 1: fuck isn't that crazy? Keep this going? I think Australia
8:47
Speaker 1: is terrible, isn't it? Okay? Singapore up there, one hundred thousand,
8:52
Speaker 1: seven hundred and forty five thousand USD. These aging countries
8:55
Speaker 1: know what they're doing. They treat their athletes good.
8:58
Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, that's incentive if I've ever seen it. Indonesia
9:02
Speaker 2: is the third highest paying country.
9:03
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's because they would be so stoked with gold medal.
9:06
Speaker 1: I reckon that. Yeah, so like six hundred thousand, three hundred,
9:08
Speaker 1: it's a big drop, big roight from Indo is huge,
9:13
Speaker 1: thousands crazy, that's massive, and think about that is going
9:18
Speaker 1: to change like that athlete in Indonesia can change their
9:23
Speaker 1: whole family's life for the rest of jet like time,
9:27
Speaker 1: any Indonesians listening right now, I reckon, what's the easiest
9:30
Speaker 1: sport to like get the golden Yeah, like shooting, shooting. Yeah,
9:33
Speaker 1: it's got to be shooting. Gotta be shooting. My whole
9:35
Speaker 1: coordination I son is called. Yeah all right.
9:39
Speaker 2: Israel two two seventy one close, Okay, the Republic of
9:45
Speaker 2: Kazakhstan is two hundred and fifty thousand. These are still great,
9:48
Speaker 2: this is this is that's so much money.
9:50
Speaker 1: All right, I'm mostopcassing you roll them off your time.
9:53
Speaker 1: Malaysia two hundred and sixteen thousand, Spain one hundred and
9:56
Speaker 1: two thousand, free to drop there, France eighty seven thousand,
10:01
Speaker 1: South Korea forty five thousand, United States thirty eight thousand,
10:04
Speaker 1: Japan thirty two thousand, Poland twenty five thousand, Germany twenty
10:10
Speaker 1: two thousand, Australia thirteen grand, thirteen k So you are
10:14
Speaker 1: the best in the world at an event and you
10:17
Speaker 1: walk away with thirteen grand. Yeah, fucking hell. Let's go
10:20
Speaker 1: look how much they better hurte Those sponsors are PanAm good, Yeah,
10:24
Speaker 1: they have to be. Let's go.
10:25
Speaker 2: Let's go look up the Olympic medal tally.
10:28
Speaker 1: We have like I think we have twenty.
10:30
Speaker 2: Ok, so let's go with Australia's in third. We have
10:34
Speaker 2: fourteen gold medals, so what is fourteen times thirteen thousand?
10:41
Speaker 2: Australia has only got to pay out currently one hundred
10:43
Speaker 2: and eighty two grand.
10:44
Speaker 1: Fuck, we we're stingya alright.
10:46
Speaker 2: China, this is the big one. They have twenty two
10:51
Speaker 2: gold medals. Yeah, times seven hundred and.
10:55
Speaker 1: Sixty eight, seven hundred and sixty eight thousand, dean point
11:00
Speaker 1: eight million dollars. China's going to pay their athletes that
11:03
Speaker 1: have been winning gold. I'll tell you, I think a
11:04
Speaker 1: gold medal should be bogs then a minimum on hundred
11:07
Speaker 1: thousand dollars. Yeah, I say, I agree. Some countries pay
11:10
Speaker 1: zero dollars for gold medal. The US they have currently
11:13
Speaker 1: the most gold medals at twenty four. All right, and
11:15
Speaker 1: the US was how much money thirty eight thousand, So
11:19
Speaker 1: thirty eight one two three times twenty four. The US
11:24
Speaker 1: is still nine hundred and twelve thousand. They're not even
11:26
Speaker 1: paying a million. Well, I don't know. I feel like
11:28
Speaker 1: some people getting robbed here. Hey, I agree, imagine devoting
11:32
Speaker 1: your life to this sport and your country. Yeah, and
11:35
Speaker 1: I see where people like jump ship and stuff a.
11:37
Speaker 2: I can see what, like, where's the incentive to be
11:40
Speaker 2: an Olympic athlete in one of those events that doesn't
11:43
Speaker 2: pay money unless you win?
11:45
Speaker 1: Yeah? Like I know, like we have a racewalker who's
11:48
Speaker 1: this racewalks who's a friend and I'm sure he's not
11:51
Speaker 1: in the Olympics. Yeah, but I'm sure like he's if
11:53
Speaker 1: they win in a gold medal in Olympics, they get
11:55
Speaker 1: thirteen k devote his whole life to it, right, I
11:57
Speaker 1: bet you sponsors for walking on that great? No, they't
12:00
Speaker 1: be that great. Yeah.
12:01
Speaker 2: The only time I think in Olympic athletes doingreat outside
12:05
Speaker 2: of the Olympics is certain sports like golf, soccer, tennis.
12:09
Speaker 2: There is a few, right, but unless you're like the
12:13
Speaker 2: top of your field winning gold at the.
12:14
Speaker 1: Olympics three Olympics in a row or something like that,
12:16
Speaker 1: because you're the best, and then you just have like
12:18
Speaker 1: this huge following, do you reckon? It's because Australia have
12:21
Speaker 1: done that because in swimming and we get bank gold
12:24
Speaker 1: medals and they can't afford it. I don't know the
12:27
Speaker 1: number events we're mid, but swimming we're like the best swimming.
12:30
Speaker 1: We always we we don't walk away with like ten
12:32
Speaker 1: gold medals. Yeah, the US and Australia are really good
12:34
Speaker 1: at swimming, so they're like, oh, we're good at swimming,
12:36
Speaker 1: so we moight ast well not pay our athletes should
12:38
Speaker 1: they do it? Like, for each individual event is a
12:41
Speaker 1: different set of money. So if we win like a
12:43
Speaker 1: golden fucking one hundred meters, that should be like a
12:44
Speaker 1: million dollars.
12:46
Speaker 2: Oh, but so many people would just be It'd be
12:48
Speaker 2: a saturated, like fuck it thing.
12:50
Speaker 1: Then I want a gold man with one hundred But
12:52
Speaker 1: I mean I say, let's go get our fucking like
12:55
Speaker 1: what he get athletes genuinely, genuinely Yeah, what if if
13:00
Speaker 1: you had to choose one? Would you do? Like do
13:05
Speaker 1: I thought could win or that I actually wanted to do.
13:07
Speaker 1: Let's go with you wanted to do and then though
13:10
Speaker 1: could win? Ah, because I would say one hundred meter sprint,
13:13
Speaker 1: I would want to win the most.
13:14
Speaker 2: But is that the best? Is that the most iconic Olympic?
13:17
Speaker 2: Is it hundred meters of sprint?
13:19
Speaker 1: Yeah? Who's the fastest man in the world, fastest woman
13:21
Speaker 1: in the world? Okay, fair enough, I reckon me. Capability wise,
13:25
Speaker 1: if I had to fire, would be my go to
13:28
Speaker 1: fift meter run. Yeah, oh you're going proper? Yeah right, Okay,
13:32
Speaker 1: I think that would be my actually proper best. I
13:35
Speaker 1: obviously wouldn't make it, but my best chance you yours
13:38
Speaker 1: would be like a my the one that I would
13:42
Speaker 1: want to win is let's go with and you sort
13:47
Speaker 1: of like maybe you could have a chance, like you're
13:48
Speaker 1: not gonna lie a bit of natural ability for the
13:50
Speaker 1: aura for the just for the aura points I would gain.
13:54
Speaker 1: I would want to win the shooting like the Turkish guy,
13:56
Speaker 1: all right. And then the one that I think I
14:01
Speaker 1: the one that i'd have the best chance in would
14:03
Speaker 1: be table tennis, even though I'd have no chance. That's
14:05
Speaker 1: a chance.
14:06
Speaker 2: I'd have no chance, but it'd be my best chance
14:07
Speaker 2: because I suck at everything else.
14:09
Speaker 1: Yeah, true, true. Maybe. Actually, you know, I woul wouldn't
14:11
Speaker 1: mind going to play golf.
14:13
Speaker 2: Golf could actually do, but I'm not good at golf,
14:15
Speaker 2: Like I don't know how to play, but I'm not good.
14:16
Speaker 1: I'll tell you what though, those Olympic athletes in Australia especially,
14:19
Speaker 1: it gets.
14:19
Speaker 2: More money, I know, like I just I just can't
14:21
Speaker 2: believe the devotion to the craft. You know, like the
14:25
Speaker 2: best pole vaulter in the world probably has a real job,
14:29
Speaker 2: you know what I mean.
14:31
Speaker 1: But even like a lot of the time, they don't
14:33
Speaker 1: have time for a real job because what they're doing
14:36
Speaker 1: is dedicating that every fucking second of their life to
14:39
Speaker 1: this sport. And then and then you don't get paid
14:42
Speaker 1: for it. Weird.
14:44
Speaker 2: And also every single country or city sorry that hosts
14:47
Speaker 2: Olympics have never made a profit.
14:50
Speaker 1: Really, they're always losing money. I think the infrastructure out
14:53
Speaker 1: of it after it's where they make the money. Like
14:55
Speaker 1: we still use from Australia two thousand Olympics infrastructure. We
14:58
Speaker 1: got lucky.
15:00
Speaker 2: Because we still do use it. Yeah, but a lot
15:03
Speaker 2: of countries I was watching a video. They build this infrastructure,
15:07
Speaker 2: but then they don't use it and they can't up
15:09
Speaker 2: keep it, so they just go to shit and start
15:10
Speaker 2: to crumble and fucking full down. But yeah, come on,
15:14
Speaker 2: because like it doesn't the tourism leading up and then
15:17
Speaker 2: the tourism at the Olympics apparently is like yep, good,
15:20
Speaker 2: but years after the Olympics it doesn't actually help. There's
15:22
Speaker 2: no tourism boost. It goes down.
15:24
Speaker 1: Interesting. It is interesting, isn't it? There's a lot of
15:26
Speaker 1: things that go into it, and like, I don't know,
15:27
Speaker 1: I feel like Australia piggybacks on the factory. We're the best,
15:30
Speaker 1: but then they don't pay them. Yeah, very weird.
15:32
Speaker 2: Yeah, I remember being when I was younger, I used
15:34
Speaker 2: to be a lot more keen for the Olympics.
15:36
Speaker 1: I'm not keen at all anymore. I don't know what's happening,
15:38
Speaker 1: but I love it.
15:39
Speaker 2: I think the one I remember I remember being like
15:42
Speaker 2: thinking the twenty twelve was good London. And then the
15:45
Speaker 2: one that I loved the most where I watched the
15:47
Speaker 2: most was Yo.
15:48
Speaker 1: I love Beijing. Beijing. Which year was that? Eight? I
15:50
Speaker 1: think that.
15:51
Speaker 2: Nah, I didn't watch that, but I did watch a
15:53
Speaker 2: lot because growing up in Canada, I was keen on
15:55
Speaker 2: the Winter Olympics and London Olympics was hectic. London Olympic
15:58
Speaker 2: was hectic, and I think the real Olympics yea fucking hectic.
16:00
Speaker 2: I think Rio is one where reducing Bolt was dominating. Yeah, dude,
16:05
Speaker 2: crazy and no one's going to beat his fucking record.
16:07
Speaker 1: Oh no, wait, all right. Up next is Confession Sessions,
16:19
Speaker 1: and today's prompt is a little bit of a double one. Jake.
16:22
Speaker 1: It's a little bit dabbling in when you gotta go,
16:25
Speaker 1: you gotta go, a bit about favorite, but it also
16:29
Speaker 1: finishes on a meet cute, which is two things you
16:32
Speaker 1: usually wouldn't combine together. We have a lovely caller from
16:36
Speaker 1: Australia's Parliament House. Yes, a politician. I think it's a
16:39
Speaker 1: politicians assistant. I can't believe that. Yeah, but please enjoy
16:43
Speaker 1: confession sessions. Hello, Hello, welcome to confession session. How are
16:49
Speaker 1: you going?
16:50
Speaker 5: I'm good?
16:51
Speaker 3: Are good?
16:51
Speaker 1: Thanks? I'm joined by j com I right.
16:53
Speaker 5: Hello, Yeah, the whole office is here listening to this.
17:06
Speaker 1: Before you cut out of you're cry.
17:10
Speaker 5: No, they're all they're all listening.
17:12
Speaker 1: Where do you work?
17:14
Speaker 5: So I work for a politician? Apartment house?
17:16
Speaker 1: Oh? Important? It has to do with her story, Jake? No, wait,
17:21
Speaker 1: what's first? So everyone listening. I know what's going on
17:24
Speaker 1: in the story, but Jake doesn't. So first things first
17:26
Speaker 1: is would you like to be anonymous?
17:29
Speaker 3: Yes?
17:31
Speaker 1: House?
17:31
Speaker 2: Have you got have you got a name you've always
17:33
Speaker 2: wanted to be called? Or do you want us to
17:34
Speaker 2: choose one?
17:36
Speaker 1: Oh?
17:36
Speaker 5: You can choose one.
17:37
Speaker 1: How did you sound like? Jake Simone? Simone? Okay, let's
17:41
Speaker 1: go Simone and Simone, your prompts kind of goes across
17:45
Speaker 1: two things. It's when you've got to go, you've got
17:47
Speaker 1: to go, and a little bit of a meet cute.
17:49
Speaker 1: But if you want to take it away and man
17:51
Speaker 1: Jake will interact.
17:52
Speaker 5: Yeah, okay, I have an embarrassing one just for reference.
17:58
Speaker 5: The doors to the toilets apart at the house are
18:01
Speaker 5: terrible to lock, so they never lost properly and people
18:04
Speaker 5: always walk in.
18:05
Speaker 1: Good to know.
18:10
Speaker 5: One day I was just you know, working and went
18:13
Speaker 5: to do my business and I obviously didn't lock the
18:17
Speaker 5: door properly, and someone walked in and I think, for
18:22
Speaker 5: like it felt like five minutes, I just sat there
18:25
Speaker 5: and looked at this man terrified. Anyway, he was like
18:30
Speaker 5: so sorry, walked out. I was feel so flustered. Anyway,
18:35
Speaker 5: I walked out and he was so nice. He waited
18:38
Speaker 5: outside the door so that nobody else came in while
18:40
Speaker 5: I was in the toilet with the door unlocked. That
18:45
Speaker 5: was so sweet. Anyway, I was like, thank you so much,
18:47
Speaker 5: and we've parted ways and I think I ran away
18:51
Speaker 5: from him quite literally. Anyway, Later that exact same day,
18:56
Speaker 5: I went with my boss to a meeting Anyway, we
19:00
Speaker 5: walked in the office and introduced ourselves and this guy
19:03
Speaker 5: was standing there with his boss, and we were just,
19:09
Speaker 5: you know, having the meeting. And I didn't really so much.
19:13
Speaker 5: I was so I was like, this man has come
19:15
Speaker 5: back to his office and told his boss all about it,
19:18
Speaker 5: because I did.
19:20
Speaker 1: That's where girls and guy's a difference. He wouldn't have
19:22
Speaker 1: said a word. He wouldn't have told anyone.
19:25
Speaker 5: Oh I God, good good. But we had the meeting,
19:29
Speaker 5: and then in Parliament House, like when the bells ring,
19:32
Speaker 5: they had to go, like the politicians have to go
19:34
Speaker 5: into the chainber. So the bells rungs our boss had
19:37
Speaker 5: to run out and we were just left there and
19:40
Speaker 5: I just said, hey, sorry, do you mind if I
19:42
Speaker 5: borrow your bathroom because I really had to wear I
19:45
Speaker 5: was so nervous. Anyway, he took me to the toilet
19:49
Speaker 5: and it was fine, and then he was like, don't
19:52
Speaker 5: forget to lock the door this time. Oh I think
19:58
Speaker 5: I just cried the whole time. I was like, oh
20:00
Speaker 5: my gosh, no he remembered. It's just so embossed.
20:05
Speaker 1: Remember, he just forgot about it.
20:09
Speaker 5: Anyway, I went out, like I came back into the
20:13
Speaker 5: office and was just like, oh, do you want to
20:15
Speaker 5: like finish the meeting without them? And we were just
20:18
Speaker 5: chatting away and then he kind of asked me if
20:21
Speaker 5: I want to go have a drink, and then we
20:24
Speaker 5: went out that night and when we spent them some
20:27
Speaker 5: more time together and then we've been dating ever since.
20:29
Speaker 1: What what? How long have you been dating for now?
20:34
Speaker 5: So it's coming up to like two years?
20:37
Speaker 1: Two? Why that is not what are you expecting? I
20:42
Speaker 1: didn't expect that at all. Have you addressed since? Like
20:46
Speaker 1: what happened? Like just a normal conversation, was like, oh, yeah,
20:49
Speaker 1: I was so nervous when I walked in. I felt
20:51
Speaker 1: so bad.
20:52
Speaker 5: Yeah, well, he actually thought I was an idiot, was like,
20:59
Speaker 5: how did you forget to lock a bathroom door? It's
21:02
Speaker 5: the first thing you check when you walk in.
21:05
Speaker 2: Especially if I if I knew that that bathroom door
21:08
Speaker 2: didn't lock very well, that's that I would be checking
21:10
Speaker 2: like six times.
21:11
Speaker 1: My foot would be.
21:14
Speaker 5: So yeah, pretty much I thought I was just im
21:18
Speaker 5: idiots for probably the first two days.
21:20
Speaker 1: Oh my god, how funny. But it all worked out
21:22
Speaker 1: in the end. Well, that's such a unique and fun
21:24
Speaker 1: way to meet your boyfriend. So like where all like
21:27
Speaker 1: all our tax money isn't going towards fixing the Parliament
21:29
Speaker 1: House toilets obviously somewhere at least we want you guys
21:35
Speaker 1: someone to go to the toilet safe work out. In
21:38
Speaker 1: the end, we won't fix them. Oh yeah, true, true, true.
21:41
Speaker 1: That's a good story to tell your.
21:42
Speaker 5: Wedding when people ask how did you say? Oh, yeah,
21:46
Speaker 5: she forgot to leave, like forgot to lock a toilet door.
21:49
Speaker 5: That has an embarrassing story. I don't want people to
21:51
Speaker 5: know that way.
21:53
Speaker 1: Were you doing a number one or a number two?
21:55
Speaker 1: If you don't mind me asking.
21:57
Speaker 5: A number two?
22:00
Speaker 1: That makes it so he walks in. How long was
22:02
Speaker 1: he in there for before he did? Was it like
22:04
Speaker 1: an instant like oh ship, sorry.
22:06
Speaker 5: Well it was pretty instant. He like looked and hiss,
22:09
Speaker 5: like eyes popped out of his head and he was like,
22:12
Speaker 5: poor guy, more bad for me. He was like, I'm
22:15
Speaker 5: so so sorry.
22:16
Speaker 6: I was like, at least it's a happy ending, so
22:23
Speaker 6: you know, at least like you didn't have to like
22:26
Speaker 6: hold in any poops when you first started dating because.
22:28
Speaker 1: He knew you did it?
22:29
Speaker 5: Yeah, exactly.
22:33
Speaker 1: What welse man, Thank you very much for coming on
22:35
Speaker 1: the pod. I have a good have a good partment house,
22:45
Speaker 1: enjoy all this time. But how good is that? How
22:54
Speaker 1: good is that? That is good? Is that what you're
22:56
Speaker 1: expecting it to go? No? I didn't.
22:58
Speaker 2: When you said, like when you gotta go, you gotta go,
23:00
Speaker 2: I was like, oh, fuck, she's gonna shot her pants
23:02
Speaker 2: or something.
23:02
Speaker 1: Yeah, but I think I like that one. That's a
23:05
Speaker 1: good little meat cute kind of Yeah. I just don't know,
23:09
Speaker 1: like he smelled her pool and then he was like,
23:12
Speaker 1: you wouldn't spell it. You would have just walked in
23:14
Speaker 1: on like, oh shit, So I walked straight out and
23:15
Speaker 1: wait out the front. Yeah. It was nice of him
23:17
Speaker 1: to say to wait there and be like, oh, she's
23:19
Speaker 1: actually chivalry mate. We talked about that chivalry is not dead.
23:25
Speaker 1: I would not be asking a girl I accidentally walked
23:28
Speaker 1: in on the toilet too, to ask you out on
23:29
Speaker 1: the day, and you're not gonna lie. I do everything
23:31
Speaker 1: to avoid. He tell you what, it's a compliment. You
23:36
Speaker 1: must be attractive somebody. Yeah. Years, that's the best story.
23:44
Speaker 1: I would love to tell that. It's actually a funny story.
23:46
Speaker 1: That's an embarrassing story. I think that's a good story
23:48
Speaker 1: to so unique. I love that same Oh and guys,
23:52
Speaker 1: do not forget. If you do want to enter a
23:55
Speaker 1: confession session, enter via the link in our description and
23:59
Speaker 1: then it's all are in the Instagram bio yep, and
24:03
Speaker 1: you go down confession sessions and then there's prompts there.
24:06
Speaker 1: If yours doesn't match the prompts, go to other and
24:08
Speaker 1: it can just be you. You can confess anything, any
24:10
Speaker 1: good story you've got, any good story. We'll get in
24:12
Speaker 1: contact with you and you can come on the pod. Definitely, okaydie,
24:22
Speaker 1: I have a I have a test for you to test. Yes,
24:26
Speaker 1: I will be grading. I didn't know I was getting
24:28
Speaker 1: tested today. I will be grading you on this test.
24:31
Speaker 1: There is six questions. Okay, sick and you throw me
24:35
Speaker 1: under the bus here. Oh no, I don't faith with you. Actually,
24:38
Speaker 1: I really I did this because I have faith in you. Okay.
24:41
Speaker 1: So I would like to test how good of a
24:45
Speaker 1: boyfriend you are?
24:46
Speaker 2: Okay, okay, with some questions and I have the correct
24:51
Speaker 2: answers here there is only one correct answer.
24:54
Speaker 1: Okay, but you did did you ask my girlfriend? Or
24:56
Speaker 1: they're just like general answers? Oh no, no, these are
24:58
Speaker 1: just the general questions, all right. Even have to contact
25:00
Speaker 1: Cassie for so I've got six questions. I'm ready, okay.
25:05
Speaker 2: Question one, if your girlfriend died, would you move on?
25:10
Speaker 1: No? Never? Incorrect?
25:15
Speaker 2: Well, no, that's right, incorrect answer. No, you should have
25:18
Speaker 2: died with her. That's an ex for question one.
25:20
Speaker 1: Mate, I've had that exact argument with my girlfriend. Nay,
25:27
Speaker 1: damn it. I was going to say. I was going
25:29
Speaker 1: to what about what I was going to continue saying
25:31
Speaker 1: was no, she can haunt me forever. Does that win?
25:35
Speaker 1: You're still alive? Okay? Question number two? What is your
25:44
Speaker 1: prized possession? What is my prize possession? My girlfriend? No? Wait,
25:53
Speaker 1: get a chance, chance, chance chance. I saved something from
26:00
Speaker 1: our first date. Okay, I'm gonna give it to you.
26:05
Speaker 1: I am going to give it to you because with
26:08
Speaker 1: this one, the only thing you couldn't say was my girlfriend.
26:13
Speaker 2: Oh wow, I need to ask you though, Why can't
26:16
Speaker 2: you say my girlfriend?
26:18
Speaker 1: I don't know. So you've got this question right because
26:22
Speaker 1: you said you saved something from your first day. Yes,
26:24
Speaker 1: now you fluked it. Okay, So I would like to
26:28
Speaker 1: know if you know why you cannot say that your
26:31
Speaker 1: girlfriend is your prize possession. She's not a possession. You're
26:34
Speaker 1: a good man. You are a good man, Okay, these
26:38
Speaker 1: hard tricks, there's a trace. I've got some. I've got
26:43
Speaker 1: faith in you for this one. Okay, I don't come on,
26:46
Speaker 1: I got this one. Okay.
26:48
Speaker 2: If you were in a dark room with a hundred
26:50
Speaker 2: other girls and your girlfriend was in there, would you
26:52
Speaker 2: be able to tell which one is your girlfriend?
26:54
Speaker 1: It's just no question, no, no, no, no, no, no answer
26:58
Speaker 1: to this. I wouldn't be in a room one hundred
27:00
Speaker 1: Look did you go? Look at you go? I wouldn't
27:05
Speaker 1: put myself in that situation. You are fucking genius, that's right. Okay.
27:12
Speaker 1: What is your favorite day of the year My girlfriend's birthday? No, no, no, no, incorrect.
27:22
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, that's that's your answer. If it's Valentine's they'll
27:25
Speaker 1: be angry. Also incorrect. I didn't have anything else. What
27:28
Speaker 1: is it incorrect? On number four? Here? The correct answer
27:31
Speaker 1: should be your anniversary. I didn't even think about that.
27:36
Speaker 1: I do know what it is if that's a point
27:38
Speaker 1: fourth of November. If that's what just knowing when it is,
27:41
Speaker 1: I think that's how you should know when it is you.
27:45
Speaker 1: It's castim all right? Na?
27:48
Speaker 2: Question number five and they're six and there's six, you're
27:52
Speaker 2: currently you currently are you're doing not bad film? You've
27:55
Speaker 2: gotten two out of okay, Okay, I can come back
27:58
Speaker 2: and come back. Question number five, Yes, what is your
28:02
Speaker 2: biggest fear?
28:07
Speaker 1: Ah, dying alone, losing my girlfriend. I don't know if
28:14
Speaker 1: I can give it to you, because that is correct,
28:16
Speaker 1: was the first questions. That's the same thing. That's what
28:20
Speaker 1: I was thinking, gilf point give you half. That's what
28:22
Speaker 1: I was thinking in my head. All right, I've just
28:24
Speaker 1: thought all the answers have been around revolved around my girlfriends.
28:27
Speaker 1: I was like five of them. I was like, I
28:29
Speaker 1: wanted to mix up a little bit. Okay, last question, Ottie,
28:34
Speaker 1: I'm ready.
28:35
Speaker 2: Is your girlfriend the looks or the funny one in
28:37
Speaker 2: the relationship? Both fucking genius. I'm proud of you that way.
28:40
Speaker 2: I'm proud of you there. I'm very proud of you.
28:43
Speaker 1: I said, I to get the answer right because it's
28:44
Speaker 1: not true. So you've gotten.
28:50
Speaker 2: I gave you an X on the start to two checks,
28:53
Speaker 2: an X point five.
28:54
Speaker 1: Yeah and a half out of six. I was actually done.
28:59
Speaker 1: That's a passing mind. That's fifty five percent. Basically, yes,
29:02
Speaker 1: I gotta say I can't be unhappy. What do you
29:04
Speaker 1: call on this test that was how good of a
29:06
Speaker 1: boyfriend are you? Yeah? Okay? And I don't even know
29:08
Speaker 1: if you can do it to me because that was
29:09
Speaker 1: like all the questions. I'm sure I can unless there's
29:12
Speaker 1: some obscure questions out there. Would you love me? If
29:14
Speaker 1: I was a word, I was gonna do one like that,
29:19
Speaker 1: and I was like, stupid question, stupid question. That was
29:22
Speaker 1: actually funny. I swear, I don't know what it is about.
29:26
Speaker 1: As soon as you get into a relationship, girls have
29:28
Speaker 1: like three to five questions loaded up of the most silly,
29:32
Speaker 1: stupidest trick questions just to catch you off guard and
29:35
Speaker 1: just ask you a question, yeah, and then be like, no,
29:37
Speaker 1: that's what it is. Yeah, what the what's with that? Yeah?
29:40
Speaker 1: Just love me? What is it? Yeah? Like and also
29:43
Speaker 1: just let me love you, yeah, let me love you
29:45
Speaker 1: the way I love you. Yeah, it's my own way.
29:47
Speaker 1: We all love in different ways.
29:49
Speaker 2: Oh man, we need to start thinking of some questions too.
29:52
Speaker 1: We should do them. Does Beth know about that?
29:55
Speaker 2: See here's the thing. I'd never ask you those questions.
29:58
Speaker 2: I haven't asked those questions, and she hasn't asked those questions.
30:00
Speaker 2: But you have a feeling she's going to know the
30:03
Speaker 2: answers to them?
30:03
Speaker 1: How can it be pretty funny like the one hundred
30:05
Speaker 1: men in a room? And Jake like we could we
30:08
Speaker 1: could make those questions a bit more like I think
30:10
Speaker 1: of the word. We could get them with the word. Yeah, yeah,
30:12
Speaker 1: we should create prank them. We should create a girlfriend test,
30:15
Speaker 1: get them on and we get them to fail fast.
30:18
Speaker 1: Let's make and then there are true questions like, hey,
30:20
Speaker 1: we're going to get together, We're going to create a
30:23
Speaker 1: girlfriend test off camp. All right, it's going to be
30:26
Speaker 1: questions that you think are simple answers, and then we're
30:28
Speaker 1: going to think of the most exceriences they make sense?
30:31
Speaker 1: All right, yeah it makes sense. And then individually, I know,
30:35
Speaker 1: we'll call one of our girlfriends, see how they go,
30:38
Speaker 1: and then the next one straight after and see who's
30:39
Speaker 1: the better guy. I was going to get him in here,
30:41
Speaker 1: gets them put them on the spot. You could you
30:44
Speaker 1: could could they have time to think of on the
30:46
Speaker 1: phone ever or let us know what you want phone
30:47
Speaker 1: or in person? Over or all right, everybody, thank you
30:58
Speaker 1: for listening once again. And Jake, where can they find
31:02
Speaker 1: extra episodes? If this wasn't enough? Patreon, Oh, I didn't
31:06
Speaker 1: know that how much is it five dollars a month?
31:09
Speaker 1: Five dog, that's pretty cheap. If yous been twenty five
31:12
Speaker 1: a week? Mate, how much is that a day? Seventeen
31:15
Speaker 1: cents a day? Wow, that's basically free. That's a co
31:18
Speaker 1: crazy skill mass. And there's extra long, hour long episodes,
31:22
Speaker 1: and there's even the vlogs are getting good over there.
31:24
Speaker 1: We're doing behind the scenes of like brand deals and
31:27
Speaker 1: like how we operate, recording days and challenges. Recently we've
31:31
Speaker 1: done what we do, you know Jamie Oliver's Can You
31:34
Speaker 1: Feed a Family for ten dollars? Can you feed yourself
31:37
Speaker 1: for ten dollars? And had a little cookoff we did
31:39
Speaker 1: and it's pretty fun. Yeah, and we actually, yeah, we
31:41
Speaker 1: need the people to vote on that. Yeah, we do.
31:43
Speaker 2: So it can be coming out when you're listening to this.
31:45
Speaker 2: That'll be coming out this Sunday.
31:46
Speaker 1: Yeah exactly. Yeah. So if you just go fuck it,
31:48
Speaker 1: just pay for one month, yeah at the blog level
31:50
Speaker 1: and just go let us know who won. Yeah, exactly
31:52
Speaker 1: one month forget about it. We love you, see you