Latest / Your Money, Your Rules | Financial Mastery, Wealth Mindset, Leadership Principles, Intuitive Decision-Making, Human Design / 74 | Can You Sell Without Feeling Sleazy? Heart-Based Selling Explained (with Andee Hart)

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74 | Can You Sell Without Feeling Sleazy? Heart-Based Selling Explained (with Andee Hart) · Your Money, Your Rules | Financial Mastery, Wealth Mindset, Leadership Principles, Intuitive Decision-Making, Human Design

0:00
Erin Gray: You're listening to Generate a Life Well-Lived podcast.
0:02
Erin Gray: I'm your friend and confidant, erin Gray.
0:04
Erin Gray: On this podcast, we will explore all things money, business and self-development, including human design.
0:10
Erin Gray: I hope you enjoy the journey where I share everything that I know and am continuing to learn along the way, as I honor my heart's desires while inspiring and encouraging you to do the same.
0:20
Erin Gray: Hi, how are you?
0:21
Erin Gray: It's getting cold over here in Boise.
0:23
Erin Gray: Hi, how are you?
0:23
Erin Gray: It's getting cold over here in Boise.
0:24
Erin Gray: The snow is falling on the mountains.
0:26
Erin Gray: We are getting ready to be able to go skiing.
0:31
Erin Gray: They are going to open it up this weekend.
0:33
Erin Gray: I doubt that we'll go because it's Thanksgiving weekend and we tend to steer clear of all of the crowds when it's super busy.
0:41
Erin Gray: We like to go skiing on the weekdays and skiing is what we've kind of landed on.
0:49
Erin Gray: We did last year learn how to snowboard and although it's super cool and I would love to do all of the tricks and things like that sort falling a couple of times and then feeling that sensation in my knees like huh, I could probably tear a couple of things inside these knees Um, it's obviously you're, you know, you're strapped in.
1:12
Erin Gray: It's different than surfing, where when you fall off your board when you surf, that's it.
1:17
Erin Gray: I mean, yes, you could be pummeled by a wave, but you're you're free in the ocean, but with snowboarding, obviously, you're still strapped in.
1:25
Erin Gray: So I kind of we all switched it up.
1:29
Erin Gray: We went to skiing last year and I think we're going to continue to do that this season as well, so excited to be able to do some more adventure outdoors things.
1:39
Erin Gray: Uh especially as it gets cold.
1:41
Erin Gray: I I have noticed I tend to stay inside more, and I don't like that, so we're excited for the snow to fall and to get up in the mountain and start practicing our scheme.
1:53
Erin Gray: So, on the podcast today I invited Andy Hart, who is an amazing human business coach and host of the podcast.
2:01
Erin Gray: She sells differently.
2:02
Erin Gray: Andy shares how she supports other female entrepreneurs change their relationship with selling so that they can serve their clients in an abundant and nourishing way.
2:11
Erin Gray: And before we dive into the conversation, if you're wanting to understand more about your own unique human design and use it to make empowered financial decisions, you can enroll in my free four-part video workshop series.
2:25
Erin Gray: This series will help you connect deeply with your intuition, gain more clarity and create a money mindset that truly supports your life.
2:33
Erin Gray: To enroll, you can head over to my website under the work with me tab, and I will also include the link in the show notes.
2:41
Erin Gray: Now let's dive into this week's episode.
2:43
Erin Gray: Hello, my friends.
2:44
Erin Gray: So I have Andy Hart on the podcast today.
2:47
Erin Gray: Thanks, andy, for coming and sharing your time with us.
2:49
Erin Gray: I'm excited to talk about your story and how you help women entrepreneurs with selling, or, as what we call, serving, so thanks for being here.
3:00
Andee Hart: Yeah, thanks for having me.
3:01
Andee Hart: I'm excited to be here.
3:03
Erin Gray: So do you want to share with the listeners your story about corporate, because I think it would resonate with a lot of them, because that's either where they have been or where they are.
3:13
Andee Hart: and then moving into entrepreneurship, yes, absolutely I have such a crazy story.
3:20
Andee Hart: I think if anyone had told me that this was my story, I wouldn't I would not have believed them until it actually happened.
3:28
Andee Hart: But, um, I was in sales, executive sales and leadership for over 17 years in technology sales and during the pandemic, I started a candle company.
3:42
Andee Hart: I've always loved creating beautiful things and so we're all stuck at home and I thought this will be fun way to fill my time.
3:52
Andee Hart: I started making candles in my kitchen, gave them to family and friends, but then, of course, my sales mind, selling them, and I had a goal to be in four retailers by the end of 2022.
4:10
Andee Hart: And within three months this was kind of towards the end of the summer I was in 120 retailers.
4:18
Andee Hart: So just completely blew my own mind.
4:22
Andee Hart: And meanwhile this is while I'm still in still have my corporate sales job, and so I actually had just received a promotion at work and had moved into a new division as a global sales director, and I was quickly told I was going to need to lay off some people at work, and that is just no matter how long you have been in corporate.
4:50
Andee Hart: It's just disheartening.
4:52
Andee Hart: I don't ever want to get used to doing something like that and, um, I also just began to think, hmm, I'm in a new organization and we're laying people off.
5:04
Andee Hart: The target may be on my back too.
5:08
Andee Hart: So in January of 2023, I just began dreaming of what would it look like if I took my candle business and I did this full time.
5:18
Andee Hart: And so I wrote in my prayer journal a date and I set a date of September 29th, 2023.
5:29
Andee Hart: And you may think, why September 29th?
5:32
Andee Hart: Why that specific date?
5:34
Andee Hart: It wasn't just a random date.
5:35
Andee Hart: I knew if I left my corporate job, I wanted to leave.
5:38
Andee Hart: Well, I did not want to leave on bad terms because I really loved my company, loved the people that I worked with.
5:46
Andee Hart: And so September 29th was five days before my 40th birthday and it was also a Friday, which was the end of our fiscal half at the company that I worked for.
5:58
Andee Hart: So I wrote that down and just began praying over that date.
6:02
Andee Hart: That down and just begin praying over that date.
6:08
Andee Hart: And a few months later, I was sitting in my home office and a VP called me and he said Andy, you know we're laying people off and we are getting rid of your job, we're getting rid of your role at work, and so most people are being let go next month, but we are actually.
6:27
Andee Hart: We have approval to keep you on board for six more months because we want you to find a role within the company.
6:33
Andee Hart: But if not, then you know we'll take care of you and you'll have you'll be released in six months.
6:39
Andee Hart: So I hung up the phone and I realized that six months from that date that date that he called me was March 29th.
6:47
Andee Hart: So six months from that date was September 29th.
6:50
Andee Hart: So I would love to tell you that it was faith over fear from that point.
6:56
Andee Hart: But I was just still a little bit in shock.
6:59
Andee Hart: So I did try to find another job that I really wanted at the company and I had a couple of different job offers, but they none that I really wanted.
7:10
Andee Hart: Um, and so September 29th came and I left that company and walked out the door and became a full-time entrepreneur.
7:17
Andee Hart: So it's been a little over a year now and I have never looked back.
7:22
Andee Hart: It has been a crazy rollercoaster adventure, but it's one of the best decisions that I've ever made for sure.
7:29
Erin Gray: Yeah, I think you know what you said without saying.
7:32
Erin Gray: It is like we can make the money, but the money doesn't fulfill us if we aren't doing work that we love.
7:40
Erin Gray: And I think that more of us, the more that we, you know, have the courage to leave to do things that we love, the the more that we give permission for others to do the same.
7:54
Erin Gray: Because, like you said, I, I, you know, I'd like to say that it was, you know, faith over courage.
7:59
Erin Gray: But like we don't, we do not have, like we think, that it's everything's going to be all in a pretty little box, you know, when we decide to make the leap and it just doesn't happen like that Right, like we still have days where I mean, you're like, what am I even doing?
8:13
Erin Gray: You know, and also recognizing that I would rather be building my dream than somebody else's.
8:21
Andee Hart: A hundred percent, yes, and I don't want to spend the majority of my waking hours of my life working for someone else's dream.
8:31
Andee Hart: I want to be doing something that I am absolutely passionate about, and I don't to your point.
8:37
Andee Hart: I don't think that any amount of money can replace that.
8:41
Erin Gray: No, yeah, so do you want to talk a little bit about what you currently?
8:47
Erin Gray: I know you started the candle company.
8:48
Erin Gray: You also have another business, so just share a little bit about your other business.
8:53
Erin Gray: And then, how do you support humans?
8:56
Andee Hart: Yes, yes, so I still have my candle company and I have expanded that, but I also started a coaching business for women entrepreneurs, specifically product makers that want to get their products on the shelves of retailers, and so it's really following the exact model that I used to get my candles out under retailers across North America.
9:20
Andee Hart: It's really using the exact model that I used and teaching product makers how to do the same thing, how to go from.
9:30
Andee Hart: Maybe they're doing pop-up markets on weekends right now or they're selling direct to consumer and they want to grow a business and really scale it, and the best way to do that is through wholesale, and so I love coaching women entrepreneurs on how to grow their product-based business.
9:50
Andee Hart: It has really become my passion, using all of the sales skills that I learned for 17 years, and how to implement that in um for for women that have created beautiful products.
10:02
Erin Gray: So it's do they come to you?
10:04
Erin Gray: Do they come to you?
10:06
Erin Gray: I don't want to use the word tired, but that's the word that's coming to me Like, okay, I know I have something.
10:11
Erin Gray: It's just like, how do how do I make this bigger than what I'm doing?
10:16
Erin Gray: Because that there's a?
10:18
Erin Gray: Um, a local macaron place in Boise and it's amazing, and I was talking to the owner the other day and she said for two or three years they did farmer's markets every single weekend and I'm just like that feels exhausting.
10:32
Erin Gray: Like so I'm curious for you.
10:35
Erin Gray: Like, do your clients typically come?
10:36
Erin Gray: And they're just like I am so worn out.
10:39
Erin Gray: This is not my idea of entrepreneurship.
10:42
Andee Hart: Yeah, usually it's one of two things.
10:44
Andee Hart: They're either either they've been selling, trying to sell online, like they have a website and they what they've been doing is not working.
10:54
Andee Hart: Okay, they've been selling online or doing pop-up markets and what they've been doing is not working.
11:00
Andee Hart: So they need help, either restructuring their online presence or maybe their product or their product packaging or their pricing, and just help with the sales and the marketing side of it.
11:15
Andee Hart: Or they're brand new and they know that they maybe have.
11:22
Andee Hart: They just have a fear of selling and talking about their product and they're like how do I do this?
11:28
Andee Hart: They don't want to face that.
11:32
Andee Hart: They don't want to be that icky, uncomfortable salesperson that is pushing their product Um, and so they want to talk about it in a comfortable way, and so that's what I teach them to do, yeah.
11:48
Erin Gray: I think we have a lot of, because nineties, two thousands, 2010s, 2020s, I mean I think it's changing.
11:56
Erin Gray: But there's a lot of ickiness that a lot of people feel around sales, which you know, you and I talked about this before.
12:05
Erin Gray: It's like sale selling is just serving, but we have because we have been sold to so much in that like forceful make a decision now kind of way.
12:16
Erin Gray: We don't want to put anyone in that position from an experience with us.
12:22
Andee Hart: Right, a hundred percent, and that's part of the problem is that we have had such poor experiences that we don't want to recreate those poor experiences for other people, and so my job is and what I do is I change that narrative and help my clients completely transform their strategy and create a whole new experience for their clients, where they are truly creating an experience and not a sale.
13:01
Andee Hart: Right and I talk about this all the time that it is truly changing, it starts with changing your own mindset.
13:09
Andee Hart: It starts with changing your own mindset, because if I go into a conversation with a potential client and think I've got to make a sale, then all of my actions and all of my words are going to be centered around a desperation, and it's going to feel icky and it's going to come across to my potential customer and probably nine out of 10 times I'm going to lose a sale and create that icky experience that we are trying not to create.
13:46
Andee Hart: Yeah, so it truly does start with that shift in mindset within yourself.
13:54
Erin Gray: So yeah, and I think you know, energetically people feel, feel that right.
13:59
Erin Gray: You know, when you are coming from that place of getting versus giving, it is a very different energy and, um, you know, I did a podcast, I don't know, it was a couple of them ago.
14:14
Erin Gray: But you know, like we want to buy, like we love to buy things, like we genuinely, as humans, love to buy stuff, and when we can look at it like someone's wanting to buy something, how do you serve them?
14:24
Erin Gray: How do you help them get what they want?
14:25
Erin Gray: And sometimes it might be what you're offering, and sometimes it might be the person down the road or someone else or whatever it might be.
14:31
Erin Gray: So, when you look at it from like how can I serve this person?
14:34
Erin Gray: How can I ask them questions, you know, dig deeper into like, what are you actually wanting?
14:38
Erin Gray: How can I help you versus I need to make that sell today.
14:42
Erin Gray: I think it's a very, like you say, it's a mindset and it's an energetic shift.
14:45
Erin Gray: Um, you know, and people feel that whether you're it doesn't doesn't necessarily mean the words that you're saying.
14:52
Erin Gray: It's the energy that you're in when you're with someone and connecting with someone.
14:57
Andee Hart: Well, and how much of communication is nonverbal?
15:01
Andee Hart: Right, and that even goes for this sounds different, right, but that even goes for if you are having a meeting or if you are interacting with someone, um, written, that is even of how long you are taking to respond to them too.
15:19
Andee Hart: Like that says a lot as well.
15:21
Andee Hart: Says a lot as well, right, and so, um, something that I learned very early on in sales I had a mentor that had been in sales for a long time and he was actually my sales engineer, so he was not even like the lead salesperson, but when he taught me was never be afraid to walk away, yeah, and his point was don't be desperate, because when you know you have a great product, you don't have to beg people to buy.
15:55
Andee Hart: And you serve people, you educate people on your product, and when they're ready to buy, they will come back.
16:06
Andee Hart: And I learned so much about sales from him and serving your audience, and that has carried with me through today.
16:20
Andee Hart: And when you are truly serving and just getting to know your clients, and when they say thanks and they walk away, what our culture today tells us is that you go.
16:36
Andee Hart: Hey, hold on, um, I have a, I have a discount code for you?
16:39
Andee Hart: Yeah, the worst thing you know.
16:44
Andee Hart: And so for me, what I, what I teach is graciously let them walk away.
16:52
Andee Hart: They're not ready yet.
16:53
Andee Hart: You know it is okay to let a customer walk away, and there are probably so many sales coaches that might be listening to this and going that is the worst advice ever.
17:03
Andee Hart: Hey, I will absolutely let them walk away all day long, because if they are not ready to buy and I am pushing them, I am creating a poor experience around my whole brand.
17:16
Andee Hart: Yeah, totally.
17:19
Erin Gray: And I think a lot of this comes back to that that scarcity over that abundant mentality of like when you know that more clients are coming and that you know what this client, it just is not a good fit.
17:34
Erin Gray: And also, for me, what I have learned with understanding human design like half of us are like wave riders, meaning like we need time to process what the information is, we need to go home and when I say think about it, I don't mean like weigh the pros and cons, I just mean like in my body, get to a neutral place where I'm like, okay, I'm ready.
17:54
Erin Gray: Like when I was thinking about buying my bike you know it was about $2,500.
17:58
Erin Gray: And I was like trying to like decipher which one I wanted.
18:01
Erin Gray: And I found the one I wanted.
18:03
Erin Gray: And then I went and rode that bike probably three or four times, completely different days.
18:09
Erin Gray: Right, like it probably lasted over a two month you know timeframe, but I'm going to have that bike for probably 10 plus years and I knew I wanted an I mean buyer's remorse happens because we're in a rushed hurry up make this decision.
18:24
Erin Gray: Versus when I bought the bike, I was like, yes, this is my bike.
18:27
Erin Gray: It felt so good.
18:28
Erin Gray: Right, it wasn't.
18:29
Erin Gray: I wasn't buying on a high, I wasn't feeling pressured, and I think that we don't like you're saying you know you're helping um women do this, but the the normal, old school way of doing business is like make them make a decision right now, which that feels very intrusive and like, hey, I need to be in my own org space, I need to kind of just be with myself and see what it is that I want, versus I have to make this decision right now because it's going to go away if I don't make this decision.
18:57
Erin Gray: You know, feels very pressured.
18:59
Andee Hart: Right, and what we don't realize and what we don't think about is sometimes the most gracious thing that we can do for our customers, and the way that we can serve them best is by giving them space to process that in the way that God created them to process it, right?
19:21
Andee Hart: Um, what you just said is I needed to go and weigh the pros and cons, because that is how I'm made to do that, right.
19:31
Andee Hart: And so if you are not allowed and given the space to do that and then you have buyer's remorse, well then guess what?
19:40
Andee Hart: If I'm the one that sold you that $2,500 bike, and even if you would have come to that decision and bought that bike and been very happy with it, but I didn't give you that space to do it, then now I am on the back end dealing with a customer that has buyer's remorse and I am going to be selling on the back end to prevent a return and it's a way bigger headache.
20:11
Andee Hart: Yeah, and that's what we don't realize is that you are creating a horrible customer experience on the back end and a lot more work for yourself when you don't allow your customers to process buying decisions in the way that they were created to process them, yeah, and also I think about.
20:38
Erin Gray: We are thinking about just this person in this moment, versus your name, your brand, for years and years and generations to come.
20:50
Erin Gray: And so what experience do you want your client to walk away with?
20:55
Erin Gray: And you know my dad would always tell me cause you know he'd always read all of the marketing sales books.
20:59
Erin Gray: He's like you know, you, you do what is it?
21:01
Erin Gray: I'm probably going to mess it up, but like you know, you have a good experience.
21:06
Erin Gray: You might tell one person you have a poor experience.
21:08
Erin Gray: You might tell five or 10 people, Right, and so just that, the just that alone of it was such a great experience to be with Andy.
21:15
Erin Gray: How many people it's like a spider web effect that we can have.
21:19
Erin Gray: Versus then you're, you know, from a loving way, like I, so fun, go see her.
21:25
Erin Gray: It was such a great experience.
21:26
Erin Gray: Versus I'm not telling anyone, or if I do tell anyone, it's going to be, you know, not a great experience that I had, and so I think that that's keeping that in the forefront of your mind to tell me your thoughts about that when you're helping clients.
21:42
Andee Hart: Yes, I, I talk about that as really focusing on pursuing long-term relationships over just that immediate transaction.
21:51
Erin Gray: Yep.
21:52
Andee Hart: Because and that's really where kind of that, that counter-cultural um you know are are so many of our traditional sales tactics they talk about just the immediate transaction, that here and now.
22:05
Andee Hart: But when you are focusing on the long-term relationship and creating the really the great customer experience, then you do have the client.
22:17
Andee Hart: That is the client for life and they may come back and purchase more from you later.
22:22
Andee Hart: But they're also going to tell about the great experience.
22:25
Andee Hart: It's so much more than just the product that you're selling.
22:28
Andee Hart: It truly is and you hit on this, the product that you're selling, it truly is, and you, you hit on this, the, the brand, the overall brand and I want people to have.
22:39
Andee Hart: When they think about she sells differently, which is the name of my coaching company.
22:44
Andee Hart: They're not just thinking about my wholesale course, they are thinking about Andy and all that they learned from Andy and the community that they experienced when they signed up to work with me.
23:02
Andee Hart: And so it is so much more than just like a simple product that they bought and that's more important to me than just like an immediate transaction.
23:14
Andee Hart: It is more about that long-term experience and I think just so often our, our culture forgets that when we're, we see what um what kind of sales tactics our culture is pushing, you know that's exactly the word I was going to use.
23:30
Erin Gray: I'm like it's an experience, right, like you're having an experience and you will remember that experience, versus looking at someone as a dollar sign.
23:39
Erin Gray: It's like we're human beings, right, like we want to be talked to from a loving, nourishing place, we want to be supported, we want to get what we're wanting to buy and, like I said, maybe that's with you, maybe it's not, and that's okay, but like truly serving the human in front of you, seeing them as you, I think also, too.
23:59
Erin Gray: You called it.
24:01
Erin Gray: What, bro selling, I guess, is that what it's called.
24:04
Erin Gray: It's very, almost definitely transactional and very separation based, right.
24:09
Erin Gray: But when we see each other as us, when I see you as me right as how do I want to be you know, how do I want to buy, how do I want that experience to be, I think, like you're talking about that mindset shift versus you're just here to give me money and I'm going to give you something and that separation between us versus we were all connected and how can I help you versus you're you know, you're buying something, I'm getting money and that's what it is.
24:38
Andee Hart: Yeah, I struggle.
24:40
Andee Hart: I struggle with and don't get me wrong, they're amazing salespeople.
24:45
Andee Hart: But I struggle with the ads that I see a lot of times and I won't name names but like um, amazing salespeople, but they are I call them the bro sales and they're like getting in there like $200,000 cars and they're doing ads for how to close more sales and close more deals, or they're getting into their helicopter and I'm like you're not on my level, like I don't own a helicopter or $200,000 car, and so it's like this is not at all connecting or serving the customer.
25:23
Andee Hart: And that is where I I feel like there's just such a like a miss, a missed, um, just connection.
25:32
Andee Hart: So often Um, and that I feel like is just those um common sales tactics that we're seeing out in the marketplace.
25:42
Andee Hart: That's often where they're coming from and where we see just that icky, icky sales feeling.
25:47
Andee Hart: You know, I love that.
25:48
Erin Gray: You said that because we didn't even talk about this before, but I think this is really important because how often we have a relationship with money and most of the time, most people don't have a great relationship with money.
26:02
Erin Gray: And so when you think about people that are coming from a forcing you place right, transaction-based place, and then you see them get in their helicopter or you see them, you know, driving their car, we then build more evidence that money is not a great thing.
26:19
Erin Gray: Because look at this experience that I've had, look at what they're doing and I think and I love what you're doing because I'm like more humans women, all of the, you know, all the humans but like women, have a good relationship with money and be doing like having a great selling experience and living in the house or the buying the car, doing whatever we want to do.
26:42
Erin Gray: Because I think that we associate oh, I don't want to, I don't want any of that and I don't want any part of that versus we can cultivate, we get to have nourishing experiences for our clients and we get to have the things that we want.
26:59
Erin Gray: Do you see what I'm trying?
27:01
Andee Hart: to say Like almost like this.
27:03
Erin Gray: I don't want any of that because all of that had to deal with forcing and pushing versus we can have those things we want.
27:10
Erin Gray: I definitely agree with you about like we might not be on the same level, and I also think that sometimes we push away what we truly want in the lifestyle that we want to live because we've been so conditioned with like, oh, if that's what I have to do to get that, I don't want any of that A hundred percent.
27:27
Andee Hart: Yeah, right, and um, we were talking earlier about just redefining wealth.
27:34
Andee Hart: Yes, um, and I think that that is, you know, kind of moving into that, that conversation of just um redefining wealth and pushing away those things that you don't want, because I don't want to be that person, if that's what I have to do to get that.
27:56
Andee Hart: And yeah, I think, when you, when you truly redefine wealth, especially just as an entrepreneur, and it, it just really, really just reshapes, um, your whole mindset, um, and how you view, um, everything about you know, your, your sales mentality and, um, you know just who you want to be as an entrepreneur too.
28:25
Andee Hart: So, yeah, I've, I, I have just seen so many of those ads lately.
28:30
Andee Hart: It's just been at the forefront of my mind, so I'm like, ooh, it makes sense, it's such a good example because we almost look at it from this duality right.
28:37
Erin Gray: Like oh, I, I don't want to sell like that, so I don't want any.
28:42
Erin Gray: Like we almost put all of that in a box.
28:44
Erin Gray: versus I can sell lovingly, I can help people get what they want and I can drive the car that I want, you know just, I'm just using that as an example, because we almost want to just cut that off, because it's such an icky feeling and we think, oh, in order to have the car that we want or the trips that we want, or, and so it's like women aren't owning what they really want, because it comes attached to this ickiness, versus if more women like you're helping them, more women can sell from that place of love and service and we get to have all of the you know toys and the trips and the you know lifestyle that we want.
29:23
Erin Gray: I think that there hasn't been that balance in the world for us to see like, hey, you can do really good things in the world and you can get to enjoy you know a great lifestyle too, you know.
29:37
Andee Hart: Yeah, absolutely.
29:38
Andee Hart: And and I want to say this too, because it um, I don't want to just call out like the, the bro sales, because I have seen like even there are um, I kind of like see, I kind of joke about like the boss babe, movement you know, of like um, there's that too of of you know um kind of that, um that culture, as well, and I'm culture in a way, right.
30:05
Andee Hart: Yeah, yeah, and so it's.
30:07
Andee Hart: It's kind of that, that real hard Um.
30:10
Andee Hart: And and I struggled with that in my corporate days because that was that was not in alignment with who I was or who I am, um, and even when I left my corporate job as a global sales director, you know I was over an organization of you know, have managers under me and then a whole organization, and I did not.
30:36
Andee Hart: I think a lot of people see someone you know as a sales director and you have to be very hard and tough and boss babe, and you know, and that is so out of alignment with who I am.
30:51
Andee Hart: I want to be approachable, I want to be kind, um, and you can be that person and be gentle, yes, and still be very successful and still be very successful and still get the job done, yes, you know.
31:13
Erin Gray: Yep, I want to go back because we kind of talked about it and I want to do more of the, you know talk about the redefining wealth, because I think also we have been so conditioned, at least in the Western society, of wealth equals one success slash, yeah, success.
31:32
Erin Gray: And how many of us that have gone through that whole conveyor belt and are like it doesn't equal happiness, it doesn't equal emotional wellbeing, and really starting to define for yourself, like, what does wealth mean to you?
31:49
Erin Gray: It might mean money, and also like emotional well-being, feeling good about what you're doing on a daily basis, like can you put your head on the pillow at night and be like, yeah, I'm proud of what I did today.
32:01
Erin Gray: You know, like I really I really supported a lot of people and so I think you know, really getting clear on what yes, wealth it can be money and it also is you know I, this was me and lots of people that I've coached and helped is like you might be wealthy in Americans terms, but you're emotionally bankrupt, care of yourself and you know, yes, you have a business, but that's not the only thing that you know you do and really making sure that you are have.
32:37
Erin Gray: You know, really, I don't like the word good or bad, but like emotional, like what is your emotional wellbeing?
32:43
Erin Gray: How are you defining as you're growing your business?
32:46
Erin Gray: Because I think, too, here we go back with that same culture.
32:49
Erin Gray: As you're growing your business, because I think, too, here we go back with that same culture right, and it is women too of just getting to that place and then you will feel successful, or then you will feel fulfilled or happy or joyful, and recognizing that that is like it's a journey and part of it is all of it along the way, is what is fun and joyful.
33:07
Erin Gray: It's not this thing that we have to withhold until we get to some number or, you know, goal, amount or destination.
33:16
Andee Hart: Yeah, yep, yeah, and so, yeah, I love that, I love the way that you put that.
33:21
Andee Hart: I um, I think it's interesting.
33:25
Andee Hart: I was just having this conversation with a good friend last night about just different seasons of our life and I was telling her that I finally feel that it is.
33:40
Andee Hart: I can see how all of these seasons of my life have been very purposeful in building up on each other, that I needed them to learn the skills needed to get to where I am now.
33:56
Andee Hart: There was a purpose for each of them and I'm so I'm very thankful for them.
34:03
Andee Hart: But I finally feel like I'm sitting, you know, when you like, sit in that really comfy chair and you're just like, oh, you know, I finally feel that I am sitting in that God given purpose for my life, and that is priceless.
34:25
Andee Hart: It is.
34:27
Andee Hart: There is no amount of paycheck income that could ever replace that.
34:33
Andee Hart: And wealth is.
34:39
Andee Hart: That has been like the probably one of the biggest lessons I have learned this year, because wealth is so much different than what the number in my bank account says.
34:55
Andee Hart: So I'll give you like a specific example in my own life now, because I am able to work from anywhere, I all of my immediate family lives right around the neighborhood circle in Arkansas and I've missed out on family dinners for years now because I'm the one that has the corporate job two states away, and so I am in the process of moving close to my family and I'm going to be a five minute walk from my sweet little niece and nephew, my mom and dad, my brother and sister-in-law, and I could not be more excited.
35:39
Andee Hart: And so I I just look at just all of the gifts of the past year and, um, I don't know, I just get chills just thinking about, like, how much wealthier my life is now and somehow I have made it significantly less this year, but the Lord is still, has still provided for me very much so.
36:19
Andee Hart: And, um, and my business has grown and um, yeah, it's just, it's very interesting how, like, all of that happens.
36:28
Andee Hart: And I think when you know that you are, have felt, you know, have been called, and you are fulfilling, like, your God-given purpose, that you know it works out, you know it's trust, it's trusting in that, and it's also like doing what you're meant to do, like it's it can't not happen, because that is what you're meant to do so.
36:49
Erin Gray: You're going to be provided the resources and we've been so conditioned with resources, equal money, but that isn't it's.
36:56
Erin Gray: It could be people, it could be community, it could be other connections.
36:57
Erin Gray: It could just be so many different things that were provided with that.
37:02
Erin Gray: We, you know our brain wants to hold onto the money aspect.
37:06
Erin Gray: When you said about you know, feeling wealthy and being able to enjoy your family so much, we have been taught that like it's the end goal.
37:16
Erin Gray: Then that's when we get to enjoy ourselves and I think we withhold so much pleasure from our lives because we're so focused on getting to the end goal, versus like the end goal is every single day, all the way till we take our last breath, right, like we've been so conditioned to get to this place, and then we get to enjoy ourselves.
37:37
Erin Gray: Then we get to feel good about ourselves.
37:40
Erin Gray: Versus how are we feeling in every single moment of every single day?
37:44
Erin Gray: And, like you said, like wealthy isn't just money.
37:47
Erin Gray: It's so much of like how you feel internally about yourself, about your life, about what you're doing, like there's so much more than just money equals wealth.
37:59
Andee Hart: And I want to have contentment to your point.
38:02
Andee Hart: I want to have contentment in today because I may just have today, you know, yeah, yeah, yeah.
38:09
Erin Gray: So yeah, I love it.
38:11
Erin Gray: Is there anything else that you want to add that maybe I haven't thought about to ask you, or you want to comment on Um?
38:21
Andee Hart: I think, no, I think we covered a lot.
38:23
Andee Hart: I loved this conversation because it's like so many important things that are challenging what our culture says about just sales and women in women entrepreneurs, and so, yeah, I I love this conversation.
38:41
Andee Hart: So thank you for engaging in in this, in this dialogue with me.
38:45
Erin Gray: So, Of course, one thing that I just thought about is like, actually, the counterculture is what is going to get you to stand out?
38:52
Erin Gray: Not that we need to stand out, but, like we've been, we've been just inundated with the pressure, right.
38:59
Erin Gray: But when someone else is willing to stand up and say you know what time out, I'm not doing that anymore.
39:03
Erin Gray: This is how I'm going to run my business here.
39:06
Erin Gray: We go back to people pay attention to that and also, like you're giving permission for other people to do that as well, and I think sometimes I mean I always joke around I'm like, well, somebody has got to do it.
39:16
Erin Gray: Might as well be me, you know.
39:18
Erin Gray: It's just like you know, like we, we need more women that are like you know what.
39:22
Erin Gray: We're not doing it this way anymore and building from community, building from collaboration, building from, you know, supporting each other versus, like I was talking about earlier, the separation, because we aren't right.
39:34
Erin Gray: We are all connected.
39:36
Erin Gray: And when you know I think women do this so naturally and beautifully, because that is just a part of our nature of collaboration how can I support you, what can I do for you and stop believing the lies that we've been taught?
39:50
Erin Gray: Well, when we do that, then we're missing out or we're, you know, hurting our business or something like it actually adds to right, and so, yeah, I love it.
39:58
Andee Hart: Yes, amen, I love that, and that is so important and one of the biggest lessons I've learned, too, as an entrepreneur that, um, everyone is so willing to help and to just work together.
40:15
Andee Hart: I love that about just the entrepreneurship community, um, and that's been one of my favorite things.
40:21
Andee Hart: So they do.
40:22
Erin Gray: I mean like that's.
40:23
Erin Gray: The thing is like people want you to make it succeed.
40:27
Erin Gray: However word you want to use, right.
40:29
Erin Gray: So ask for what you want and support you know.
40:33
Erin Gray: So I love it, thank you, Andy, for coming on for sharing your time with us.
40:37
Erin Gray: Where can people find out about you?
40:39
Erin Gray: Your candles coaching, all of the things?
40:41
Andee Hart: Yes, absolutely, I am.
40:43
Andee Hart: I have a website, andyheartcom and you spell my name A-N-D-E-E a little bit different and I also have a free Facebook group.
40:53
Andee Hart: It's she sells differently on Facebook.
40:56
Andee Hart: And then my candle company is heartdesigncocom.
41:01
Erin Gray: okay and so can we go and buy directly on your website for your candles?
41:05
Erin Gray: You can, okay, yes?
41:06
Andee Hart: absolutely okay, thank you.
41:08
Andee Hart: Yes, thanks for having me.