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Sacred Pauses: Finding Quiet in the Everyday · The Rooted Soul Podcast

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Good evening and welcome to the Rooted Soul podcast. I'm Alan MacDonald.
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TheRootedSoulBooks.com is the website where the first collection can be purchased.
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It's also on most book retailer websites, Amazon and others.
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Alan at TheRootedSoulBooks.com is the email and at Alan MacDonald IRE is the Instagram handle.
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This evening, I just got home about 40 minutes ago. It's 9.30.
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I had back-to-back-to-back meetings, very productive day and work.
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And it got me thinking, I got home, the flat was nice and quiet after the hustle
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and bustle of the day, there's some road work coming on outside.
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It's the first time I've seen an evening or a night crew outside,
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but if you hear any background, that's what that is.
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And I was contemplating what are those sacred pauses, as I call them,
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those little moments in a day or a week or a month where we can kind of sit back and reflect.
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And oftentimes people talk about meditation and things like that and,
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years ago which will be funny for people who know me that don't know this but,
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i did hot bikram yoga for about a year and a half two years,
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i used to do it two to three times a week i found it amazing there's 26 poses
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standing poses which is the most difficult part and then the the sitting pose
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which you spend time lying down and then you go into these different poses, but,
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there's always about 30 seconds given when you're lying down to kind of clear your mind, you know?
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And I never could. And the same with meditation.
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I never could. There was always something on my mind. And now I realized it
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took me a long time to get to the point of really isn't about emptying your
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mind. It's not, well, for me, it's not really possible.
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It's just about letting every thought go by. You're not catching on to any of them.
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Let them, you know, like a, like a movie, let them pass by.
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And you find that once you're becoming detached from them, then you kind of
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have that moment of silent reflection.
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So it's like they're, they're going on at least with me above the head.
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And I was thinking about it because I was certainly, you know,
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as you can probably tell by the accent, but anyone who knows me,
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you know, I have very strong faith for what I believe in.
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And, and it is steeped a lot in Roman Catholicism and certainly Irish Roman
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Catholicism, you know, Padre Pio, or anyone knows me, he's my boy.
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Someone worth looking into in a life story of a monk and a priest and a mystic,
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and he had the stigmata on the hands and it who's never really proven in one
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way or another what that was.
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But just someone that was in my life, as long as I can remember,
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there was like a plaque with a velvet background. I remember as a kid,
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and I had that for so long.
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And I have the rosary beads and stuff. And it's, you know, I'm not an interreligious
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dogma, or, you know, I believe in a higher power, whatever that may be.
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I don't happen to think that one religion is right and the other one's wrong.
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I think ultimately it should be about how you live your life and how you make
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amends and all that kind of thing.
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And I was thinking tonight, because I came home and I did something that I quite
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often do, actually, where I put up the Angelus,
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where the bells toll, certainly in Dublin from the Paro Cathedral,
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which I've been there many a time to experience, for a minute of reflection.
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And I find the bells and the gongs very kind of cathartic.
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And I did that tonight you know I made a cup of tea and just reflected for a
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minute and you know detached from it and it got me wondering how people what
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are people's sacred pauses and there's a number of different things for me you know,
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I actually wrote a poem so tonight there'll be a few poems that are mine.
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And I wrote a poem, which will be in the second collection called The Angelus.
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Now I see what my mother meant. A minute's reflection to think or repent.
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Doesn't need to be holy to impact your day. A break from the routine as the gong strikes play.
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Maybe my background, religion and Ireland. I do find some comfort being still, silent and idle.
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I guess it would make John Charles McQuaid proud, unless he found out all the sins I've allowed.
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Find where your peace belongs for a moment of silence, whatever your reason for peaceful abidance.
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And it's become something where even in work sometimes at noon,
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if I'm not on a call, I'm at my desk, I'll put in the earphones and I'll just
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listen to it for a minute.
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And it gives a moment just to kind of step back, you know, for me and not think
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about the stress of the workday or anything else and to have that mini little break.
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Because often even, you know, when you're taking a lunch break,
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often in my place where you're having it at your desk or you're going off and
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you need to go and shop for something.
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Or so you're constantly on the go and thinking about something and I do try
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and find space every day you know for it's really it's in the ordinary things you know like,
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oftentimes we look at the big questions and the big things in our lives and
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we have to focus on those things you know whatever they are,
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and actually the beauty of the relaxation and de-stress is very often in the little things.
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And I think about I've said this before and I'll read a piece on that as well,
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it's not just churches and cathedrals but those large spaces in particular you
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know I read the poem Blessings before about my mother taking me to church before
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school most days before I started school,
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but it was never to mass it was the church so you'd light a candle the church
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would be basically empty it might be 10.30 on a Monday or a Tuesday morning
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when all the rest of the your brothers and sisters were in school,
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and I guess that's where it came from for me it's that time to reflect and I
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spent a lot of time probably more than people realize in,
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churches and cathedrals and around here there's a number of beautiful ones in
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southeast London just to sit there you know I,
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I think that's the right word. A few years ago, and I went into the church,
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and I just hadn't even thought about it. It was beautiful, but it was not a Catholic church.
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I mean, he came over, and we sat down, and we talked, and I was saying,
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like, does it bother you that, you know, I just love these spaces.
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And we had a great conversation with the fact that he couldn't care less what religion anyone is.
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If they want to come in and reflect or repent or whatever it is,
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he said, that's what these spaces are for.
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You know, obviously, then I told him he had the wrong religion that I walked out. I'm just kidding.
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But we do wonderful chat about it and i went back to to that church and still
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do it from time to time it's in ladywell near ladywell where i used to live in southeast london,
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and but i find those spaces it's it's something about big beautiful buildings when they're empty,
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there's something very peaceful about it when i'm going back to the choir and
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work where we did a lot of great things a tv show years ago and one choir of
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the year and they were wonderful people and it's changed so much I left it nearly
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10 years ago now going back to it this week,
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just to do some rehearsals and just catch up with those who are left and meet
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the new people and again there's such a positivity around that kind of space,
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and I remember we used to do corporate gigs and we did some at the V&A at night,
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V&A museum Victorian Albert here in London,
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but the ones I always remember are we did two or three at the british museum,
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and again it was at night and it was a wonderful space to walk around because we were kind of given,
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carte blanche and freedom of the place so there were people mingling there was
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food and there was drink and after we'd done our part and then a few of us just
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kind of wandered off to go around,
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this huge space however you feel about the british museum and some of the artifacts
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and where they came from it is a fascinating place to be.
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And i kind of long to be able to go back and just be there on my own.
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But particularly with churches and cathedrals, there's something about sitting
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there in a big echoing chamber of a place.
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And again, it is sometimes the iconography and the connection to my roots in
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terms of the religion my family would come from for a long, long time.
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But also just that point of it's a place to go and reflect. And I wrote a poem on this.
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I know, Les, I've literally written a poem on everything now.
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I know what you're saying, but, uh, this was called steeple people.
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I found solace in churches, chapels, cathedrals at all.
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It's only partly ritual that has kept me enthralled. Realizing recently why I love those spaces.
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A rare place in modern life, not rushed to up the pacing.
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Silent, calm, reflective. A moment to give pause. To the hectic nature of today,
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brief respite from its flaws.
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Wooden pews and incense hues, holy perfume like obsession. Try it without mass
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and you'll agree with my confession.
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And it's something that's been with me for a long time. You know,
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I'm a very social person, as I talked about before, and I love people,
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and I love, and I'll talk about that a little bit later, and those kind of ways to relax.
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But sometimes it is about yourself like i don't like complete silence ironically
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most of the time i'll have white noise on at night sometimes or music in the
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background or again john creed in rt radio i find his,
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his style is is very relaxing for an end of day,
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type of music show that he does you know i mean there's such an eclectic and,
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mixed you know genres of music really that,
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i find very relaxing as well but those kind of spaces i don't know if anyone
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else actually feels that i'm sure everyone has again their own kind of,
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place where they go even if it's just at home and obviously i live on my own here most of the time,
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i can only imagine how hard it is if you're married you've got kids or you got,
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housemates tenants whatever it is right it can be quite difficult to find that
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space and yet so incredibly important at the same time you know.
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And really, the Angelus encapsulates a lot of that for me.
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As I call them, as I said, the kind of sacred pauses. Those kind of times where,
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you know, it's my favorite cafe down the road from me here.
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It can be a wonderful place early in the morning when I get the chance.
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But mostly on a Saturday morning, I try and get in at seven when they open.
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And you just have this time and this place to sit on your own mostly and reflect
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of coffee, maybe read the paper.
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I mean these little places for for peace you know.
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I've talked about music as well before as a place of peace for me and that,
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it's an immensely private pursuit for me at times where, I mean,
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I like every type of music from classical to heavy metal and everything in between.
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As long as I like it, I'll listen to it.
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And I can get quite stuck now, the music that I like. It's very hard to get
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me into new music. But then there's so much of it over the years, you know?
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Like Irish music, which I've talked about before, is a wonderful place to retreat
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to certainly when you're away from home to remind you of home and family and friends and,
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you know as i've done a previous podcast about my father music permeates my
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family among other things the pursuits and culture.
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So the irish music the dubliners i mean ronnie drew was the lead singer of the
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dubliners i'll read that poem in a second but uh you know it's funny,
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my mother's side of the family it was always talked and he was like my grandfather's
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cousin i don't know if he was or he was indeed very much those kind of the beard
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the hair the steely blue eyes they're very,
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i have that kind of a look and there's there's others in the family cousins uncles who,
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bear so much more of a resemblance and but that kind of music and culture went you know through,
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the family and it's it's a wonderful place sometimes to go back to I mean I'm
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very often when I listen to music for maybe an hour or so it will be a specific
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genre when I'm at home on my own,
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I'm in that kind of a mood which I'm sure is no different really you know to anybody else.
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But the Dubliners in particular I found.
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It just transports you to another place and time you know I wrote a poem called
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The L-Dubs which some of you will have heard and,
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The wild roving singing bagatelles from O'Donoghue's Two MacDades.
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We came for the crack and porter, for poetic folk we stayed.
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From the soft gravel of Ronnie, granite dulcet tones of Luke.
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Banjo heartbeat of Barney and Ciaran and John the duelling dukes.
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Taking us to Monto via Seven Drunken Night's Folly. Whiskey in the Jarrow and
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Raglan Road and Nod to Molly.
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Hand me down my Bible, bearded bards have just begun.
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A song for Ireland's contrival for one night again is one and the Dubliners.
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When I listen to them and I have to be in that mood not that they're not absolutely brilliant,
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all the time but I do find it takes me to a place because obviously they're
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very Dublin very steeped in the history of Dublin you know and I find this,
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they've sung about everything there's uh i mean luke kelly's one was the night
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visiting song which is a beautiful you know i must away now,
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it's a wonderful love song and it's a medieval one i think actually i don't
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think it was written by them,
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but they sung about everything from you know the struggle for freedom and unity,
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to life in dublin and i remember when i started listening to them actually It
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amazed me that growing up and being a teenager in the 90s,
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you have a view about certainly the 50s, but the 60s in Ireland as a very staid gray kind of place.
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And, you know, we've replaced one oppressor for the Catholic Church,
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which ruled with an iron fist.
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And when I talk about my Roman Catholicism, it is certainly not without fervent
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criticism of the Vatican and not just crimes perpetrated in Ireland, but elsewhere.
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So my faith goes beyond those things.
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It goes beyond the sins of man, I would say.
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But those things I've been a fervent critic of over the years. But listening to them,
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you realize actually that, and it's wonderful when we talk about the beauty
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of ordinary things and those times where you find peace, and yet bubbling under
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the surface in Ireland, and I'll talk about Dublin because I know Dublin.
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When you realize listening to those songs, there's a lot of rabble-rousing,
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pints and women and romance and,
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rebels and jokes and stories and swears and the kind of things as I said that
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you know when I talk about John Charles McQuaid all the sins I've allowed,
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and underneath it there's as with anything else,
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you know there's a there's a slightly oppressive oppressive regime or you know
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a very judgmental maybe outwardly the judgmental society and yet you when you
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listen to the songs and you read the lyrics,
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you understand actually that like anything else there was ordinary life going
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on with people who weren't always pious and thank god for that,
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and i find that very relaxing to listen to because it it transports me to a
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dublin that i don't think i ever really knew right i mean it was before my time
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and it was my parents time and,
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still sounded like a you know a kind of wonderful place where under any kind
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of situation, people find life.
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And I do find it, you know, songs like the L triangle.
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I just find very, kind of sad and melancholy, but relaxing to listen to.
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So Irish music, again, in my life has become a kind of a go-to.
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You know, I love to know and find out with people with music as well.
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Where is your piece? Is it classical music, which can be a wonderful background
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to just, you know, breathe out, exhale?
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Again, a song can transport you for two, three minutes. and,
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as i say we often we often look at life in terms of the big things,
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it'll be the big job the big romance the big house the big car the big holiday,
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these are the things that make me happy and i always remember reading a a study
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that said that i think up to 50 000 pounds in terms of salary,
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those pay increases can make you very happy but there is a law of diminishing returns after for that.
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Not that we shouldn't be getting pay rises, guys.
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I do think there's something in that. You know, for a long time in my life,
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I was searching for the big ticket item to be content and actually contentment's all around you.
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You know, we go through difficult things and you can have things in your life
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that, you know, cause great chaos, but the contentment is always there, you know?
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And it's in those small moments.
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So sitting in a church for me or quiet coffee on a Saturday morning with a paperware,
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i'm not bothered by the work week i'm not bothered by anyone else it's it's
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me and my space or those moments when i was doing the hot big room yoga or listening
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to the angelus where i i don't look for an empty mind anymore i just,
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detach from the thoughts as they fly over my head,
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you know because my thinking works i don't know if it's everyone else as well,
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that I will latch onto the thought at the time and that can sway my mood briefly.
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And it learning to let those thoughts pass by that they're not,
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they're not you at the moment.
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They're, they're waiting for you to catch on to them. And particularly if they're
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worrying thoughts or, and you're
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angry at somebody and it comes back and you kind of, oh, you clench.
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That's what they're there to try and do, to sway you.
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But that contentment, I think, if you find it in those kind of beautiful moments
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and, you know, as I say before, I find it very, you know, Shane McGowan in particular,
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you know, his, his, oh, he wrote poetry as well, his lyrics are poetry.
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I don't know if I've read this one before, but seeing as I settle back into
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the pogues very often over the years, both to lift the mood and to relax and detach.
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And this is from Rainy Night in Soho where, well, it's a, it's an homage to
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McGowan, but also there's, there's words in, there's lyrics from the song in there.
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Measuring our dreams. Covered in the cloak of silence. I hear you talking in my head.
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Sing Shane McGowan, poetically crowned, the best to put paper with lead.
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Singing lonely and solo, transported to Soho, rainy night here in my room.
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Love lost and care tossed, but never to be glossed. The king of the lovesick and doomed.
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You know, when I composed this evening, it wasn't the Pogues, actually, I put on.
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I'm learning it at the moment for the live show, but Christopher Cross sailing.
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Put it on there, lads, if you don't know it.
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That's a wonderful detachment, son.
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It starts with a long instrumental. Actually, apparently it was an accident.
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They laid it over twice in a row without putting his vocal on it,
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and he just decided to keep it in.
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And it's very much again it has that late night feel to it that after the party
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2 a.m you know maybe you're having the smoke out the back garden or you're just
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sitting there thinking and it's just this wonderful late night melody,
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and a hopeful uplifting kind of song that's on my repeat on spotify and so quite
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often it comes on and i always have to listen to it and it just it kind of grounds me,
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but it's you know music is great because it does so many different things.
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In terms of mood you know my mood can be shifted,
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you know by music and then the other thing i always talk about are people you
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know i read a poem it's one of my rougher ones in terms of i think the meter
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doesn't quite match and i haven't gone back to it for a long time,
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i am and it's not of any of the collections but you know around 2020 COVID when
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I came back I was in London for a few months staying with family it's a wonderful
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time actually even though it was a worrying time for people at the start of
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all that we won't get into that.
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I was back to the flat that I was living in at the time, and I was waiting to
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start work. And a friend of mine, Ray, is retired now.
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And I got into know him and a few others over a number of years through a mutual
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friend, and they always kind of had a few pints in Greenwich,
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and I'd meet them when I could.
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And he messaged me one day, and he goes, listen, there's a big garden at the
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back of the Ashburn of Arms in Greenwich. It's a lovely little tucked away pub.
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And he goes, come out and meet us. I'll tell you when we're going.
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I'll tell you when we're going. Come meet us.
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You know, it just blows away the cobwebs of all that, you know,
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isolation and that was going on with COVID.
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And it became a ritual where I get out. And on Fridays, I try and get down as
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many Fridays as I can for a few hours after work.
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You know, I usually have a sparkling water these days or a Coke Zero.
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And the odds are I might have a pint with them. But most of the time,
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for the last few years, I didn't. And you don't need it in that group.
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It's an eclectic group of people. and every walk of life is there every type
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of conversation and i found quite often in stressful times that i was just able
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to retreat and again detach,
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you know when you talk about places and.
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They're my go-to to just blow off the cobwebs of the week you might spend two
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or three minutes talking about your week and then it's back to what tv shows i was watching there,
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did you listen to that radio program or podcast or we've toned down the politics
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over the years i think certainly here in the uk you know in,
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since the scottish referendum and then brexit and it kind of poisoned the water
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whatever your stripe is politically,
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you know but also it we've got me to reach a point where i will only debate
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politics with people who can debate and and And they're wonderful at that around
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that table, but it's been talked about to death.
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So it's a very relaxing kind of place to go. Let me try and find this poem now.
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And it's a kind of a wonderful, just a wonderful spot. The woman who runs it is amazing as well.
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But here it is. Fun, honesty, and the ash. Who's first in and who'll be last on a Friday to the ash?
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The place we go for the chat to flow during that week, weekend clash.
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Same table, different people, depending on the week. Serious chat or needle, political or preach.
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Come rain or shine, outside is fine. Shiver or sweat, it's the same.
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Of a motley crew who don't care what you do so long as your round is in frame,
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so they're great people you know i've often had a message in recent times of,
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from one or other he'll say you know it's been a really shit week are you coming
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down on friday i'll be there at five or whatever and you know these are guys who,
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five to six days a week in places in granite years ago they'd be out rain or
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shine they'd be sitting outside,
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and now obviously we all get older everyone's got different responsibilities,
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different things going on.
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So it's a kind of a once a week thing. And it kind of makes it all the more special, I would say.
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But I felt like this weekend, but being around family, I had a wonderful time
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on catching up with everyone. But on Sunday, I call up with my brother.
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And Sunday night, they help me two sisters and nieces and nephews.
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And just a quick, impromptu bit of food, go up and make sure I'm catching up with everybody.
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And it's a wonderful, relaxing evening where everything was talked about,
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and it reminded me of those Thursday nights in my parents' house when we'd have
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family and sometimes friends would be over on that Thursday night where my father
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would go out with the uncles and his friends and my grandfather would arrest
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him when he was alive as well.
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And they would come back and my mother would cook a fry up for them.
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And they'd be in the house for a few hours and up for work early in the morning,
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but there till maybe two.
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Cups of tea and laughter and everything else. And I've read this before,
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but it's worth reading again. This is called Thursday Nights.
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Crouching by the staircase, as kids we would listen. The laughter jokes the
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stories from the Thursday crew in the kitchen.
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Back from the pub for mam's fry-up, tea to sober. For the 2am return,
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from where they all drove over.
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Hanging on the words echoed laughter, serious talk. Between funny retorts from these humorous hawks.
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For thirty years or more, family
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friends of my folks would gather every Thursday to enjoy uncle's jokes.
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Could weave a tale from knock-knock, adding funny bits between,
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and never glancing at the clock, but up at 6.15.
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What a treat when let in on, joining this smoke-filled rambunction,
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laughter and the odd song of Thursday's weekly function.
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So, yes, that's kind of where, you know, those kind of feelings came from,
25:56
you know. I'll do one more here, actually.
25:59
This is kind of about those early mornings. So, Sunday morning.
26:03
A morning first touch of sun, warmth pours upon the face.
26:07
Coffee mug in hands becomes, propped with thoughts of the day.
26:12
Tree whispers gentle breeze, soundtrack to wistful dreams. But surely this will
26:17
continue and revive every sinew.
26:19
Sun Sunday brings back the serene.
26:22
A bird breaks the peace. Alarm sounds so sweet.
26:26
To take me back to here and now. Chores to attend and brunch later with friends.
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As the weekend peters out with a bow.
26:34
So they're my kind of, my go-tos, you know.
26:38
The other thing is, now that I'm on here and thinking about it,
26:42
is I sometimes retreat to television, so I don't really watch TV in terms of channel hopping.
26:47
A lot of stream stuff where I go back and watch old movies and old shows and
26:52
I found in recent years wonderful as modern tv writing probably the best it's ever been,
26:57
I do sometimes find shows just over complicated like jesus I get it,
27:03
you started what I thought was the start was the middle but it was the end but
27:06
it was after before and the butler and the mother of jesus like wait okay so
27:10
that's actually a cartel not a family and,
27:13
I retreat back sometimes to the older simpler shows bit of Magnum Columbo Columbo's
27:18
great one of my favorites and still stands up so many of those episodes still stand up,
27:24
and I like to retreat into those shows that can kind of wash over you,
27:27
it's old comedy geos so I love the the road movies with Crosby and Hope transport
27:32
me to my childhood and watch them with my father.
27:36
And then the comedy duos, which I've talked about before, Morecambe and Wise
27:39
and the two Ronnies and Avalon Costello.
27:43
I never really got back into the whole Laurel and Hardy thing.
27:46
They're wonderful as they are.
27:48
I like that comedy and the humor that has that little bit more to it.
27:53
But again, not too much depth, not if I'm looking to detach.
27:56
But I'm always interested to know, guys. Let me know where your kind of relaxation comes from.
28:02
You know, those kind of the ordinary miracle that step back for that sacred
28:08
pause, whether it's for an hour, whether it's for an afternoon or an evening,
28:12
whether it's just for a moment, like a minute, like the Angelus as well.
28:16
I'm always interested, you know.
28:19
As I said before, for a long time, I thought happiness would be,
28:22
it's going to be some grand event, you know.
28:24
And actually, when I look back, it's little conversations I had with wonderful friends.
28:30
Those snippets of advice, there may not even have been advice,
28:33
but you walked away and you couldn't forget that thing that was said and the
28:38
laughter that was had, you know, or the tears that were shared.
28:41
And, you know, those moments even on your own where you're like,
28:45
Jesus, I feel so relaxed. And, you know, like me this evening,
28:49
the pressure of tomorrow is tomorrow.
28:52
And I come home a little bit stressed and then took those steps,
28:57
the cup of tea, the Angelus,
29:00
Christopher Cross, all those little things, you know, to take that kind of time
29:06
out, I think, which is really, really cathartic and really important, guys.
29:10
And for those of you who, you know, have a fuller life than me,
29:13
right, raising kids, etc etc,
29:16
try and take that time every now and then if you can and again i'm really interested
29:20
to hear from people on this kind of stuff i just thought it was something that
29:25
might have people might find interesting with some of the poems one or two and
29:28
i've read out tonight will be in the second collection as well.
29:32
So with that guys i leave you this evening to your relaxation it's 10 past 10,
29:37
and i'm up early to meet my old mate lolly for coffee in the morning before i hit hit work,
29:43
so again it's alan mcdonald the rooted soul the website is the rooted soul books.com
29:48
where you can buy the first collection eventually the second and there's lots of free content,
29:53
alan at the rooted soul books.com is the email and at alan mcdonald diary is
29:58
the instagram handle where i got a lot of dms guys on these and i appreciate
30:01
anyone who listens and certainly those of you who listen to these podcasts right
30:05
to the end i mean god love you,
30:07
but as always guys better living within.