Latest / The Unfiltered Tea with Evie / Finding Your Identity Beyond Motherhood with Crystal Shadwell
Transcript
- Evie Tavares: Welcome to the Unfiltered Tea with Evie podcast where personal brands and service providers come for honest, anti-sleeves marketing advice that actually works. I'm Evie Tavares, founder of Evie Tavares Branding. And if you're tired of manipulative tactics, sleazy marketing strategies, and feeling like you're the only one who doesn't have your business altogether, you're in the right place. On this podcast, we're diving into a copywriting, personal branding strategy, business mindset, I just wrapped up recording with the next guest on the Unfiltered Tea with Evie and I met this person through High Vibe Women. She is so incredible and just the impact that she already has, but I know will continue to have in what she's doing is amazing. So I'm so happy that she was able to come on and talk to us about how to take care of yourself as a mom and how that allows you to take care of your other responsibilities. Welcome to the Unfiltered Tea. I'm back with another guest episode with the incredible Crystal Shadwell. Crystal, thank you so much for being here today. I want to take a quick moment just to thank you so much for joining me in this space just to encourage you that if there was anything that kind of sparked something for you or you felt like somebody that you know maybe needed to hear, please feel free to share the episode. ⁓ And you are excited to hear more, go ahead and subscribe and listen to more of the episodes. Crystal Shadwell: Thanks, Evie, I'm so excited. Evie Tavares: Yeah, me too. I'm excited for the questions I have and the conversation we're going to have. let's just get right into it. If anybody hasn't met you yet, tell us a little bit about yourself and what you do. Crystal Shadwell: Yeah, for sure. So my name's Crystal Shadwell. am an event planner. I am a higher ed professional. I am a mom. I am one of those people who do 18,000 things. So we've met through my entrepreneurship world, I guess you could say. So run events for women, primarily moms. ⁓ I a wonderful business called Something Beyond Mom, where I like to remind moms that we need to take time for ourselves and away from our kiddos. And ⁓ my and I, run events where, yeah, you come and hang out with other moms and you leave your kids at home. Evie Tavares: and balancing business with kids and real life. I'll be bringing in some epic guests, including business experts share their insights and real experiences in life and business. You can expect real life stories, tactical tips, ⁓ and the spicy EV moment, all served up with your morning cup of tea. So grab your tea, get cozy, and let's get into it. in business or motherhood even better. we talked about how to manage mom life with everything else that you carry on your plate because as mums and women, we like to pile a lot on that plate and sometimes it feels like a lot to manage. So we into that and balancing entrepreneurship with a full time job and the importance leaning into your community to grow your business. So without further ado, our next guest is Crystal Shadwell. I'm so excited that you're here and I can't wait to continue this journey with you. Crystal Shadwell: ⁓ And alongside that, I've been running events for women in other spaces, again, just to kind of... Evie Tavares: Crystal is an educator, speaker and podcaster dedicated to empowering women to reconnect with themselves beyond the demands of motherhood. As the co-host of the Team Crew podcast and co-founder of Something Beyond Mum, a vibrant community where mums can find space to thrive outside of their parenting roles, Crystal inspires women to embrace the idea that it's not only possible to be a loving mum, but also to live a fulfilling, multi-dimensional life without the mum guilt. ⁓ further ado, Crystal Shadwell: take time for ourselves and knowing that we pour into everything and everyone else just to kind of take some time for ourselves. And I've been in this world of entrepreneurship for the last two years, but I've been working in higher education for the last 15 years, at Wilfrid Laurier University, ⁓ I manage student support and engagement. And it's so interesting how so much of the world here now dips into my entrepreneurship world. But yeah, ⁓ love working on campus and supporting students. Evie Tavares: Enjoy the episode. Reach out to me and me or Crystal, if there's anything that you hear that you love, we love to hear back from you ⁓ in. Enjoy. Crystal Shadwell: and I've spent half my life here on this campus. So it's also a very important place to me. Yeah. Evie Tavares: Yeah, that's amazing. And you've mentioned to me before, like, just how much you love your job. Because I feel like sometimes entrepreneurs feel like they have to quit their job. They have to, they can't just keep it a side hustle. But you are someone who enjoys doing both, right? Crystal Shadwell: Totally, definitely I wish that there was 18 days in a week and I wish there was more hours than a day. Throw motherhood in there, it's like three full-time jobs. But I really do and I definitely, the reason I stepped into entrepreneurship was because I have such an amazing impact here on this campus and I love having it and I always had this itch of like, I know I can have that impact beyond campus. So how do I wanna do that? And that really sat with me in the back of my head forever and I tried. tried a few different things like with younger women earlier in my life before I became a mom. I always knew it was women I wanted to work with, but I never really knew who. And then when I became a mom, I was like, ⁓ this is the hardest job I've ever had. Like those are the women I want to really lean into and work with. But it wasn't done in a way of like trying to lead my job in education, you know, trying to, who knows the scales very well could tip one day that entrepreneurship becomes full time. But yeah, for me, it's a side hustle and just something to to fill I love so much here that I also now get to do in a new arena. Evie Tavares: Mm-hmm. And that leads kind of nicely into my next question, which is obviously you're balancing a lot of things. Like you said, like basically three full-time jobs. I'd love to know ⁓ was the moment that you realized that moms and women need that space that you're building in something beyond mom? Crystal Shadwell: Thank Yeah, definitely when I wasn't taking it for myself. ⁓ that my husband and I had kids later in life. I am a 40 year old with a four year old. So parenting came to me a little later in the journey. And my husband and I always knew we wanted our child to fit into our life as opposed to take over our life. And we talked about that a lot before ⁓ Cole, my son, before he was born. ⁓ And were like, okay, we have jobs we love, we have involvement in the community, we have a really great relationship. So let's make sure this doesn't take over and then inevitably, obviously, I became a mom and took over. And was like, well, nothing else matters other than Cole. Like everything else drops. So for the first probably like two years of his life, like I was very much ⁓ just all him. Like nothing else mattered. My needs didn't matter. My relationship didn't matter. The things that really filled me up didn't matter. And my husband was gentle and kind, but also like, hey, like this isn't what we said we wanted to do. ⁓ this isn't the best version of you for him, for us, for anything, for you. I started trying to figure out like, okay, like, you know, how can I not kind just be drowning in motherhood? going back to work, coming back to my job here on campus definitely helped. And I was like, okay, there's that girl. There's more to me than motherhood. And then that's when the itch really started getting to me that I was like, okay, other people need help with this. Because if I was someone who was so sure I wasn't gonna do it and I drowned that much, and I was looking at all of my other friends who were the same thing, just trying to find themselves again and really losing that sense of their identity to motherhood, we are beyond, that's why my business, something beyond mom, right? Like we are more than just mothers and that can be whether that be your primary role whether that be one of the most important things to you It's part of who you are and I think we're all better when we can step away and kind of fill our own cup and we can step away and remind ourselves of these other parts of ourself before coming back to our family so that was definitely a big part of it was the fact that I just wasn't doing it and then Needing know that you know, there was a place to help other people do it, too Evie Tavares: Yeah, that's such a good reminder. Like I think there's some of these trending posts where it talks about moms and it's like you forget sometimes that you're also living your life for the first time, right? Like you're also having some of these experiences for the first time, whether it's with your kids or not. Like you still, I think it's still so important to have that identity outside of just being a mom. Crystal Shadwell: Yeah. And to give yourself that grace, right? That's why I love those reminders, because it's like, yeah, we're doing this for the first time. Every new milestone that they reach, we're reaching right alongside of them trying to figure out for the first time. And even if you have more than one kid, it's still, even if it's not the first time, it's the first time with that child. And I'm a one and done mom, but I know everyone who has multiples tells me, right? They're two totally different human beings, so it's going to be a different experience. So to give yourself that grace that we're learning just as much is important. Evie Tavares: Yeah, 100%. And something that you've mentioned before was getting into rooms before you felt like you belonged. And especially with something beyond mom, do you think there's sometimes like a bit of a hesitation, like people feel like maybe they don't quite belong there? Is there any kind of message that you would have for somebody who feels that way? Crystal Shadwell: Yeah, so interestingly enough, the first High Vibe event that I ever came to, Something Beyond Mom didn't even exist yet. So I came to the very first High Vibe back in 2024, I believe, was their first one in Kitchener. And I was going with a friend of mine who owned a business. She had owned a brick and mortar salon and then shut it down to become a home spa. And a friend of mine was like, Crystal, you love presenting and standing on stages. Like, you should go to this event. And I was like, well, I'm not an entrepreneur. or why would I go? But then I dragged my friend to come with me and I left that event like lit up like a Christmas tree like so excited and I was like, okay, this is the year that I am finally gonna do something beyond Laurier. big time on that one. Like I didn't even have the business yet. And I think every subsequent event after that, it was like, well, I just started a business. My business is only six months old. ⁓ I'm even making money in my business. So like all of that self doubt and all of that kind of, you know, inner dialogue that I had to work through. to be like, well, every time I step in these rooms, I'm better. And right. Like then we only we accelerate and we expand and we get so inspired by being in those rooms. So definitely. like the retreat I went to, I went to the first high vibe retreat as well. And that one, felt so small. I was surrounded by 15 other incredible women who had businesses that I looked up to so much. They were founders that I just was so inspired by. And I was like, how do I belong here? Like, I'm still so new. I'm still so small. Evie Tavares: Bye. Crystal Shadwell: in this space, but then realizing like obviously everything that I have in 15 to 20 years in higher ed like does, like I say, relate a lot to the world of entrepreneurship. So there is things I can contribute to the conversation and I'm a consumer so I can contribute to the conversation. really pushing myself to be like, you know, we often forget that I be one or two steps ahead of someone else who looks up to me, ⁓ whereas looking to someone who's one or two or 10 steps ahead of me, right? So I think we don't give ourselves enough credit sometimes about where we actually are in the journey. So by pushing myself and getting into those rooms, I've only expanded, but it definitely was a lot of the time before I felt like I was ready to do it. Evie Tavares: I actually didn't know that about you that the first one, because I don't think you and I met at the first one meet. We met at like the second or third one, I believe. But I didn't know that at the first one, you didn't even have your business yet. So I think that's like such a testament to ⁓ in yourself, ⁓ it's as a business owner or as a mom, like just taking that chance on yourself and putting yourselves in the situations where you can grow and be expanded. Crystal Shadwell: Yeah, you never know what's gonna happen in those rooms, right? You never know what connection you're gonna make that's gonna lead to something. was fortunate enough to stand on the stage at High Vibe last March, right? That was a year into owning my business. I never thought that something like that could happen. So yeah, by in those rooms, you're opening yourself up to opportunities, and I think that's the best thing you can do. ⁓ Evie Tavares: Yeah. And so you also host these events and retreats and facilitate conversations yourself. So what does a typical something beyond mom experience look like and feel like for the women who show up for themselves? Crystal Shadwell: Yeah. The biggest thing that we hope for in all of these spaces is that you can show up and not worry about anything. So we try to take care of all the details, right? Everything because we know that we are all managing so many pieces and try to keep so many balls in the air. So we really want people to know. And I say we, like I do have, like I say, a co-founder of Something Beyond Mom and the retreat that I'm hosting this fall, I'm co-hosting with another business owner and another friend, Courtney. we always say that with these spaces, like come ⁓ you are with... whatever's going on and you don't have to worry about anything when you get here. So whether it be the food, take care of making sure like you can easily park, you are ⁓ fed, you are well taken care of, you're totally poured into so that for that, whether it be just a couple hours at a dinner, ⁓ it be a longer day event where, you know, we do sometimes like a yoga and brunch kind of half day event or the full retreat that I'm hosting this fall, like for whatever the amount of time is that you're gonna take away, you don't have to worry about anything and you're gonna be surrounded by ⁓ who, you there's great energy. I always love so much the way that people talk about the energy. Like, it's just, it's calm, but it's also, what's the right word that I want to use for it? Like there's like an excitement in the air, right? Like I think we all just feel like, ⁓ like it feels so good to not be tugged on for like a snack or like needing to, you know, do a bathroom break or, you know, the mommy, mommy, mommy that we hear a thousand times a day. Like the only conversations you're going to have are with people and it's not going to be interrupted for once. And how nice is that going to feel? there's a lot of like really good positive energy and just show up as you are and we'll take care of the rest. ⁓ Evie Tavares: Yeah, I love that. Because I think especially like for moms, you're constantly thinking of everything, all the details. I know like the running to do list in my head is excessive and terrifying. So being able to go somewhere where like, and even you said like the ease of parking, like, that's something we think about, right? Like we're that, like thinking ahead of planning of where we're going, where are we going to park, like that you look after all of that for the people who show up is incredible. Crystal Shadwell: That's the thing, the mental load that we all carry, like we're happy to like at least let it be easy, like we always say, just get it in your calendar. All you need to do is commit to putting that in your calendar and then you know that you don't have to think about anything else other than maybe, yes, where is the child and who's gonna be taking care of them while you're there. But other than that, right, yeah, so it is true, because the to-do list is never ending. And I think that makes me a really good event planner because of the fact that you know what it feels like to carry that to-do list and I carry it as well. So I make sure that, yeah, you don't have to few hours. Evie Tavares: Yeah. And along with the mental load, something that a lot of moms struggle with as well as the mom guilt. So when moms are first kind of coming into your community, coming to events, what's the most common thing with that that they're carrying that kind of prevents them from prioritizing themselves? Crystal Shadwell: Well, the mom guilt is exactly it, right, Evie? Like, we all feel that. Like, I think you sometimes need to, like, get over the hump of doing it to actually feel what it feels like when you do, because you're gonna be able to give yourself all the reasons not to. You're gonna be able to come up with all the excuses, all the barriers. And we hear that from moms all the time, right? Like, like, this is going on, that's going on, you know, it's hard, especially with this first weekend retreat. That's a big ask, right, to come away for two and a half days. ⁓ But... Evie Tavares: Mm-hmm. Crystal Shadwell: we see time and time again that, you know, we show up nervous, we're all checking our phones a little bit of like, is everything okay at home? Like, is bedtime going okay? Like, where are things at? But within the first like half hour, you can finally disconnect, you can finally that sigh of relief and have that space. And then by the end of the night, it's like, ⁓ I don't want to have to go home. Like, it feels so good. ⁓ then that reminder of like, how good did it feel to just take that time for myself so that I know by pushing myself and getting over that hump, it is worth it. Even though like, it's okay to feel the guilt. Like we always say, we don't want you to not feel it because it's not realistic to not feel it. Like you're going to in some way, then if you can push yourself to just do it anyways, how good it feels on the other side is what makes it worth it. Evie Tavares: in Yeah. And I think there's realization that yeah, you feel guilty about it, but then also you're showing up as a better mom because you're looking after yourself and prioritizing yourself. That's something that I've found like since having my kids from the very, very beginning, probably the first, well, I had mine right before COVID. So November 2019 and then went through COVID with her. So I was on my own a lot. Crystal Shadwell: Mm-hmm. Evie Tavares: So then when it finally came time to go out and leave her, was like, but it's like, that was literally what kept me sane was finding myself again, after I my second daughter, it was a lot quicker that time, just making sure that I have something for myself because I think that literally makes you a better mom. Crystal Shadwell: Yep. It does, right? And you want to show that example to them, right? Whether it be sons or daughters, you want to be setting that example of it's important for us to have these different parts of ourselves and have different communities that we're a part of, have different ways that we do things that are just for us. And it doesn't make me love you any less. In some ways, it makes me love you a little bit more, because I have more patience for you when I come home. Evie Tavares: Yeah. And so I know that mums are kind of your primary focus with obviously something beyond mum, but you also recognize that kind of all women deserve a break because all women run a lot of things and do a lot of things. So what would you say is there kind of like a similarity between mums ⁓ women in general? Crystal Shadwell: Yeah, I think women in general, like, I think we're just wired that way to take care of everything. Evie Tavares: Mm-hmm. Crystal Shadwell: Right? So, like when we think about the retreat, we were joking like, who's kind of like our ideal client for the retreat? And I was like an exhausted woman, because no matter what, like she's tired in some way. And whether it be that it's work that's really full or, you know, like we joke like dog mums will be welcome. Because like even that, right? Like whatever it is that you're taking care of as a woman, you're giving it 150 percent probably. You're pushing yourself maybe, you know, beyond the boundaries that, you know, are realistic at some times. to just be able to take that time and that space for yourself wherever you are in your journey. I think motherhood definitely made it kind of all of those qualities in me for sure. But no matter what, like all women, I know that we are like this. And when I look back at when I thought I was busy prior to motherhood, I still was like, right? I was volunteering more. I was working a full-time job. I was doing my master's degree while also working full-time. ⁓ my plate was just full with other things, but it doesn't mean my plate was any less full. I think all women need to realize that you need to have yourself on that plate somewhere So that's why I'm leaning into now It doesn't just have to be moms because all of us need it and I have so many friends who don't have kids who are like when can I start coming to your event? Evie Tavares: So there's definitely a window for it there. you mentioned at the beginning that you've been 15 years working at Wilfrid Laurier. Yeah. ⁓ ⁓ we said, that's a career that you really love. How do you kind of balance building something of your own while also being like really committed to your full-time job as well? Crystal Shadwell: Yeah. It's tricky. think what's good is that I have an amazing leadership team that I work with. Like I'm part of that leadership team and then my ⁓ boss is such a badass woman herself and she like really values like what I'm doing and really believes in it and believes in me. ⁓ she said like since I started doing this she's like what you do here is actually improved by what you're doing out there. So ⁓ to have a social media presence as an example like with Something Beyond Mom, ⁓ of my portfolio here is managing the social media for our faculty. So the fact that I have this ability to do it now for myself in entrepreneurship helps in what I'm doing here on campus. A huge part of my portfolio is running events for prospective students, for current students. So event planning, like it's all, there is definitely a lot of interconnected ability. And then of the things that I'm most passionate about is really helping students. recognize and identify and manage the fact that their life is bigger than school and what's going on for them outside of the classroom is completely going to impact what's going on for them inside of the classroom and that to me was like the biggest aha when I realized like well I'm trying to get moms to also realize right that we are bigger than that role ⁓ of like every yeah both of them just like lean into one another ⁓ trying to find the time like there was ⁓ day we had like a pretty big meeting here on campus that I should have been at But I had signed up to go to one of the high vibe events and I was torn and I didn't know what to do and I was gonna cancel my ticket and my boss was like you know what Crystal like when you go to those events like you're so energized like you're at you come back and like she's like you already function at a pace and like a way like above and beyond like a lot of other people here she's like but you come back and you're even more right so she's like it's good for us that you have this other branch of your life like she really believes in that and believes in what I'm doing is really helpful so I'm able to take time and space it's hard, right? Like trying to figure out I'm taking a day away from work, which means I may be also taking them a day away from my family, but fit it into the best of my ability when I can and how I can and having the support is definitely helpful. And right now, as an example, it's three o'clock in the afternoon. I'm in my office. So I find, ⁓ yeah, I the time for the things that really I know ⁓ are to be valuable that I'm going to be able to pour a lot into and take a lot out of. Evie Tavares: Talking to me. Yes. Yeah. I love the synchronicities between, like you said, your business and then the students. I never would have thought of students having a life outside of university because when I was, I had kids, I was following some people like fitness influencers who were, going university and like that was their identity was going to university. And like the one girl I'm thinking of specifically now runs like Crystal Shadwell: Mm. Evie Tavares: a multi-million dollar business that has nothing to do with what she went to university for. it's just, ⁓ I never thought of that connection before. That's really cool. Crystal Shadwell: Yeah, I work with students that are struggling in one of the capacities that I have here. And through that work, I actually focused my master's degree on how your life impacts your learning. So like, are the different facets of your life, both like physically, mentally, emotionally, family, financially, like every aspect of yourself that you can think of? ⁓ does it impact your ability to learn? ⁓ then through that, I was able to build a program here on campus for students that are not on track to help get them back on track. But I was like, we have to take care of them as a person. first, just giving them the academic skills is not gonna do it. Like it's not that they're not academically capable, it's that there's other stuff probably in the way and that's what we do here. Evie Tavares: Yeah, I love that. I to talk about you for a minute. ⁓ Again, a lot of things, but you really prioritize ⁓ encouraging people to take care of themselves and that kind of thing. So what does self care ⁓ and yourself look like for you on like a regular weekday, let's say a Monday like it is today? ⁓ Crystal Shadwell: Okay. I do somehow wake up at 5 45 in the morning most days to work out. Yep. It's not fun. Yeah. So yeah, in my basement, I hate it. Like I miss being in the gym with other people. Like I like not surprisingly love being part of different communities. So I do miss my gym community. But right now in this chapter of life, Evie Tavares: Do you? I'm clapping for you. Mm-hmm. Crystal Shadwell: Something's better than nothing. So I yeah wake up at 545. I work out in my basement and then I'm pretty good about meal prep too just because like there's so much Stuff on the go if I don't do all my meal prep on a Sunday. I eat like garbage for the week So I actually have a good amount of food prepped and ready to go like our good friend less always prepping proteins So I have that pretty much ready to go which is helpful I've been getting into the habit of even through the winter Evie Tavares: I'm going to. Crystal Shadwell: I was actually quite committed to doing a lunch walk every day. And Carrie, actually someone who I met through High Vibe, she encourages what she calls naked walks. So like no technology, like no headphones in, no phone. So like you're just walking with your own thoughts, which is the only time of the day that I actually get to just sit with my own thoughts, I find. So I take a lunch walk every day, a naked lunch walk. And then... Evie Tavares: Okay. Okay. Mm-hmm. Crystal Shadwell: Yeah, I try. The one thing I'm really bad at is I'm on my phone way too much. So I think that's the one piece of the self-care journey that like if I could be my phone a little earlier, I am very good at committing going to bed early. Like sleep is a big thing. My husband and I, I'm pretty sure would be divorced if he didn't get enough sleep because he is not fun to be around when he doesn't get enough sleep. ⁓ Evie Tavares: Hmm. Crystal Shadwell: Cole always been what we call a sleep unicorn. He's been a very good sleeper since the get. ⁓ So yeah, we commit to an early bedtime as well. So yeah, that's kind of my self-care in a normal, kind of typical work day. Evie Tavares: Good. Crystal Shadwell: probably should slow down and pause a little bit more between things like so many meetings in a day and kind of running from here to there to everywhere, picking up coal, getting home and making dinner. So if I could breathe a little bit more during the day, that might help, but I do try to steal a few moments for myself here and there. Evie Tavares: Yeah, but that all sounds like really practical and doable. think sometimes people get overwhelmed at the thought of creating some like fancy self care ritual with like bubble baths all the time and and like candles, but like it doesn't have to be fancy. It could just be looking after yourself physically, mentally, like with your food, making sure your nutrition is good. Stuff like that can make a world of difference. Crystal Shadwell: Yeah, I think that's the thing, like you have to fuel yourself in a positive way, right? So that is the one thing that I try ⁓ to be pretty good about. Evie Tavares: Okay. Yeah. And so you also credit online community with helping your business grow too. ⁓ think we both have that in common as well. We're in a couple of communities together, I think. What did leaning into ⁓ that community kind of look like in practice for you and what kind of changed when you started doing that? Crystal Shadwell: Yes. Mm-hmm. think by being part of these online communities, like stealing inspiration from others definitely was part of it, like being able to see what's possible. there's definitely sometimes it can feel daunting and, you know, your brain can do all the tricks on you of like, well, you could never create something that big. You could never, ⁓ you have that level of success, but by actually just like, again, looking and trying just to look like I say, like someone who's like one to two steps ahead of me or someone who, you know, I've been able to connect with through these online communities to see like a big win for them that for them they're like, wow, I can't believe I'm here and watching that progression and being connected to these people and seeing their growth and seeing what they accomplished to be like, I can do this too. Like there is possibility here and there's evidence because of these people that I surround myself with and hearing people who I look up to, who I think are, you know, have got it made having struggles maybe and like having challenges that I'm like, oh, it's not that different. Like it might be Evie Tavares: Mm-hmm. for them. Crystal Shadwell: different scale so I think that was just really helpful as well by leaning into these you know communities and being reminded that we're all trying to figure it out we're all just trying to do our best in it was a really helpful thing and then when building my own like the first probably, I don't know, at least six months of Something Beyond Mom. We really leaned into just having really strong Instagram presence. even though we weren't making money, and even though our events were quite small at the beginning, we really tried to build that online platform so that people had a place also to kind of just, again, get a break, even by just looking at our ridiculous content. We're always, we're a little too comfortable looking foolish dancing on the internet. The van who I run Something Beyond Mom with is always good at finding all the trending ridiculous things and somehow I'm always the person comfortable doing them. like we also wanted to build that space like for our community like so that it wasn't just about selling tickets to events it wasn't just about like that side of things but it was like ⁓ is a space where you can ⁓ know ⁓ other like-minded people and have a laugh and have a moment for yourself and hopefully then also start you know coming out to the events and by really pouring into the page and by really pouring in and building that up there. A few months ago we hit a thousand Instagram followers. That was a huge deal for us in our small but mighty little corner of the world. having great engagement ⁓ that online community, with our mailing list, that's led to now ⁓ sell out every event that we host, which is really wonderful. But by doing it in that space first without the pressure of everything else was also really helpful. Evie Tavares: you touched briefly ⁓ kind seeing what's possible for success. And I think that's ⁓ a thing right now is people finding their own versions of success. Is that something that you've kind of dealt with and kind of come to terms with on your own? Crystal Shadwell: Totally, yeah, and I think, you know. A money making business is not the only way to define success. Six figures sounds nice, seven figures, multiple, right? We hear all those things. My first time doing VIP at High Vibe, I was sitting next to someone who had sold three seven figure businesses. I was sitting next to someone who owned an eight figure candle company and I was like, where am I? But reminding myself the impact and the ripple of what I'm doing. ⁓ 25 moms have taken two hours for themselves, like the ripple effect of that, like of what it's gonna mean for their family, what it's gonna mean for them, like all of those pieces. I was like, that's still really important impact. And that also is a successful business. And like I say, now it's nice that we sell out events and ⁓ time we launch something, we know it's gonna sell out. Like that's a great space to be in. But also, you know, through the, you know, me being like, let's just give away 10 free tickets. and then we're funding this thing all on our own. ⁓ just those little switches and like, you know, ⁓ pieces of growth definitely have, I think, allowed me to define success differently. Evie Tavares: And I can tell that it brings you a lot of joy too, like having that impact as well. you also host a podcast with your husband, right? The Team Crew Podcast. Can you tell me a little bit about that and how it complements what you're doing with something beyond mom as well? Crystal Shadwell: Mm-hmm. Yeah. So the team crew podcast is a was like it started as like a little passion project for my husband and I ⁓ We started it when Cole was a little bit younger and maybe a little bit less all encompassing in his demands of our time But we launched it because again like we just wanted like something like all we were doing was talking about coal, right? Like I think we get into that grind as parents like great My always said we were like we were like almost like in the business of raising coal It was like we were business partners, right? Like every conversation was about like How do we maximize the efficiency of this household? How do we maximize bedtime efficiency, time schedules, all the things? So when we realized we don't talk about anything but him and that, and that's not good for our relationship, and we were both, something creative and fun to do together. So were thinking about where can be? And we had talked, since we got married, the efficiency of our organizing, we're like, we know that our skills are very complimentary, like we could run a business together and maybe one day we will. But we're like maybe this is the way to do it, like great this is the kind of platform that might make sense. My husband also is a great presenter and really comfortable talking. When I met him I was like does this man talk more than me? Like is that possible? ⁓ My friends were also a little shocked about that. But he also used to produce music for movies so he had some like tech skills that he was not using anymore because Evie Tavares: You Crystal Shadwell: because now he's the VP of legal at a tech company. none of that creative side is there anymore. So yeah, so it was just kind of like a perfect storm of all of those pieces we were like, all right, let's do this. ⁓ Evie Tavares: Mm-hmm. ⁓ Crystal Shadwell: But in terms of what we wanted to talk about, I was launching something beyond mom, so he's like, well, how do we build your authority so people know that, you know what I mean? You're someone who they should come to your events and you can be trusted and you get it. So the Team Crew podcast is all about managing life parents, managing relationship in that space, trying to just, again, manage all of these different facets of who we are in this chapter and how can show up as the best version. Evie Tavares: Mm-hmm. Crystal Shadwell: of ourselves while doing it. ⁓ it's just us riffing about the lessons learned and what we're trudging through at any given moment. And we bring on some wonderful guests to talk about their experience in like whether it be running a business and parenthood or fill in the blank kind of what their expertise is and ⁓ what looks like in the of parenting. So. It's on hiatus right now because Cole is just a little bit too much work. we've actually been talking about relaunching it, so I'm hoping that comes back soon. But yeah, there's two seasons of all sorts of wonderful episodes, and it was so fun. ⁓ gave us a chance to ship off Cole to my parents for an afternoon and record and have some fun conversations together. Evie Tavares: love that. It's like the best, the most creative version of a date night, I think. Yeah. I love that. And I love that you got- Crystal Shadwell: Totally, yes. That's also why it's on hiatus. Because I was like, if this is all we're doing together, that was also not good for our relationship. like, maybe we should go on a real date every now and then. But you know what it's like. And you have the support with your podcast. But Matthew's like, we don't need to have anyone else produce it and edit it and all of that because of his skill set. But I was like, well, this, again, is the only thing that we're doing together, because it does take a lot of time. Evie Tavares: ⁓ Yeah. Mm-hmm. Crystal Shadwell: We were like, for the sake of our relationship, think we decided to press pause on it for a minute, start going on some real dates again, and then we'll bring it back. Evie Tavares: Mm hmm. Yeah, I think that's part of the piece too of like, something beyond mom, like it ties into like the mom, like both parents having something together, having something on their own, like those are always for everybody to just be sane and happy. Crystal Shadwell: Yeah. Matthew and I have always tried like, we've had this like system where Saturday mornings are like mine for myself. So I get like three to four hours guilt free. I don't have to justify where I'm going or what I'm doing at all. I can just have that time for myself. And then Sunday morning, he gets the same thing. He goes to a coffee shop so he can write and have his own space and do that. And we've had that system for a few years now ⁓ yeah, it's so important to like have those different elements that are again, like for you as a couple. Evie Tavares: Mm-hmm. Crystal Shadwell: you as an individual, you as like that role in the family and all of that kind of stuff and we both have very full-time jobs so we've had to be intentional about how to carve out that time. Evie Tavares: Mm-hmm. What would you say is the hardest part of something beyond mom while you're also still in it? Like you're a mom, you're busy, you're still in it. What would you say is the hardest part? Crystal Shadwell: Well, would say like last year, like we were on such like an up and up trajectory that I totally burnt out. Like we were just doing too much too often, right? Like we were running an event every single month you're planning one, promoting one while you're running this one and like you finish one and you're already into the next. So I think just the pacing. was a big learning lesson for us. And because we had so much momentum, we didn't want to stop the momentum. I totally burnt out. And it wasn't good for our partnership. It wasn't good for our community that we had built. It wasn't good for us as individuals. So this year, going into year two of Something Beyond Mom, we're like, OK, every other month still has a wonderful offering and is still a great space to be able to provide that for the community that we've built and for the moms that we connect with. So I think we had to learn the hard way to slow down. ⁓ because by stretching ourselves too thin, we're not practicing what we preach either. So I think that was definitely ⁓ hardest thing to make sense of kind of. ⁓ next year we'll reevaluate again, right? Like, do have the sweet spot? You know, is it too slow now? ⁓ And we do one big a quarter, like a big ticketed event that's like a kind of half day. ⁓ Like at end of this month, we have a Pilates and Plunge Day ⁓ where we're cold plunging and breath work and then a Pilates session and all sorts of stuff. Evie Tavares: Mmm. Crystal Shadwell: then we also, once a quarter, just do a dinner. Book a reservation, at restaurant, 30 tickets, ⁓ first first serve, right? So it's like a lower lift, it's not quite as much to organize. So trying to find what's the right cadence has been ⁓ a growth experience for us. ⁓ Evie Tavares: Mm-hmm. Yeah. And what would you say, like, what's kind of next for Something Beyond Mom? I think you mentioned part of it already, but... Crystal Shadwell: Yeah. Well, guess, like to me the retreat definitely is like the big thing that's next. it's not, like I say, directly a Something Beyond Mom event because we will open it up to non-moms as well. And this fall. So an event like a three day, two and a half day event is definitely kind of the next big piece that I'm towards ⁓ in that And every now and then we ⁓ muse about, we know that there's that Something Beyond Mom could be everywhere. Like we are here in Kitchener, Waterloo, and moms drive in from... pretty like within an hour radius I'd say of we have moms who come from Branford, have moms who come from Stratford, Cambridge, Burlington area and anytime I show up at any event and I share what I do ⁓ are like I want this in my city. My mother-in-law is adorable and she's out in BC and she's like we are ready for a chapter like and she everyone and anyone about it and I obviously family out there ⁓ so they're eager it so we do say like if the capacity ever came to us to scale this thing. Like, I believe we could have chapters of something beyond MUM across Canada. now, there is zero capacity for that, but if anyone's listening, like, I'd love to do it and they want to be our partner, by all means, let me know. ⁓ just looking for the right partners, I think, to make it happen, but maybe one day. ⁓ Evie Tavares: Yeah, I love that. That's super exciting. So I like to close off with rapid fire, but before we do that, can you tell people where to find you? Where can they find information about something beyond mum? Crystal Shadwell: Yeah, so I'm all over Instagram. So ⁓ Instagram is just my name, Crystal Shadwell. Something Mom and the podcast are linked directly off my main page, but they also have their own individual Instagram pages. So Something Mom and the Team Crew podcast. I have a website, crystalshadwell.com, where you can find all of those things as well. And Something Beyond has a great mailing list that if you sign up for that mailing list, that's how you get first access to all of our events and all of our tickets, so that's also linked on our Instagram page, so you can find me there. Evie Tavares: Perfect. And I'll link everything in the show notes as well. So yeah, let's wrap it up with a little bit of rapid fire. What was the last thing that you did just for you? No kids, no work. Crystal Shadwell: Can't wait. I guess it's been a minute if it takes me this long to figure it out, not rapid at all. I am... I feel like I went away, but I feel like I'm not trusting myself about that. Did I actually go away? Actually, my husband and I just hired a babysitter. So that was a big thing that was not, right? That was just for us. ⁓ guess husband does get included in that journey. But we've been having ⁓ actual date nights again because we have a babysitter. My parents are close by, so they're always available to help. But having a babysitter just hits different. Then you have no worry about the time frame in the same way, no guilt about leaving him. Evie Tavares: Yes. Crystal Shadwell: there. I'd say that a good date night. We saw some friends we haven't seen for a while. We went to one of those like activate rooms because I want to do something like movement wise. I don't know if you've been to activate so much fun. It's like I don't even it feels like a workout. You should look it up. You'd like there's like different rooms where you have to do different challenges and they're all like very movement based based on like the technology in the room. It's pretty cool spot. Yeah. Evie Tavares: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Okay. Okay. cool. Okay, I'm gonna look it up. What is one word that you would use to describe your community? Crystal Shadwell: Tighten it. Evie Tavares: Mmm. Crystal Shadwell: It's a tight-knit community and it's really cool because we have like our what we call our OGs like the original moms who have been with us from the get-go for the whole time. But we also now it's really wonderful to see like there's moms who are hanging out with other moms outside of our events because of the connections they've made at our events. And they're just like such big supporters of each other. ⁓ Everything do like I say all are absurd, dancing, trending, ridiculousness. Like ⁓ just so up for sharing and laughing with us. and being part of this. So it really is a tight-knit community that every time someone shows up, even if you're brand new, it's just so welcoming also. Every event, everyone's so welcome and feels really good when they show up. So that's how I would describe it. Evie Tavares: Awesome. And are you a coffee or tea drinker? Crystal Shadwell: All of this energy is natural. I'm like a non caffeine girl. ⁓ Yeah, so I had a matcha a few weeks ago and I was like beyond out of control. Like I cannot caffeine and I cannot do it. If I do anything, it would be tea. My dad is British, so that is in my genetics. ⁓ But yes, so a little bit of tea if I can handle it, but I would have to be herbal. Evie Tavares: Really? Yeah. OK. ⁓ yes, yes. Yeah. Yeah. ⁓ only herbal, ⁓ Not English breakfast tea. Crystal Shadwell: English breakfast is still a black tea, like I just, caffeine, can't do it. I love it. I love it real gray. Like I love the taste of it, but yeah. Evie Tavares: I know. Yeah. Yeah. What is the best piece of advice you've ever received and actually used? Crystal Shadwell: Actually two of your past guests, this was something that they talked about that I love so much. If you're getting advice from someone who hasn't walked the walk that you're on, don't take it. So that's very Laura Sinclair and her and Kelsey were talking about that recently when they were on a podcast together. And I think it's so true. I think just by, we're always looking for inspiration and all of the information from other people. But if you're looking to that from people who haven't sat where you've sat and can't really get it. I think there's no point in taking the advice and I really try to keep true to myself on that as well. here at Laurier, like I'm really fortunate I manage a lot of the things I used to do in previous iterations of my career and I think it's so ⁓ that someone who's actually like sat in the seat you're sitting in who can really understand where you're coming from to advice from those people so that's something I try to keep in mind always to not be looking at all these big successful people who haven't done any benefits just not in the same like phase of life I'm in right now. Evie Tavares: Yeah, yeah, that's so true. Good advice. there one thing that you believe moms need to hear right now but probably won't say out loud or they don't hear it out loud? Crystal Shadwell: I think moms right now always just need to remember that you are more than a mom and it's okay to want that and it's okay to crave and towards that, that you have all these different parts of yourself and they are all just as important as your family. ⁓ Evie Tavares: Mm-hmm. Yeah, love that. And what is a dream partnership or collaboration that you're calling in for 2026? Crystal Shadwell: Last time I got asked this, actually landed it. So now that's scary to ask it again. I aspired to have like a host, guest on my podcast and I got it for these girls from Australia. It blew my mind. Dream collab, dream collab. ⁓ Evie Tavares: So let's make it two for two. Crystal Shadwell: Now that Christina's a mom, maybe I want there to be like a high vibe mom event. Evie Tavares: That would be so good. ⁓ Crystal Shadwell: Right? Like the moms who are like just to lean into that side of it a little bit, right? To be like there's the mom printer space definitely exists, but like how do we make it high vibe? Tap, tap, tap. Carly would also be all over that. Like there's enough of us. I think we'd be all over it. Evie Tavares: Yeah. Mm Love that. Okay, we're locking it in. Christina. No, I'm just kidding. Yeah. Yes. You know what would be cool too? I think a mom entrepreneur event where you can bring your daughters if you have a daughter or your son, if he's into it, where you can bring your kids. Yes. Yeah, I'd love that. Okay. Crystal Shadwell: That would be right, so they could be inspired. Yeah, that would be pretty cool. ⁓ Evie Tavares: Perfect. Well, thank you so much for coming on Crystal and for sharing all of your wisdom around balancing all of these things. Like I don't know how you do it honestly. And yeah, I'm super excited for people to dive in and thank you so much for coming on. Crystal Shadwell: I don't, but I tried my best. Thanks so much for having me. This was a lot of fun.