Latest / Lights Out / Lights Out - Special To Hollywood
Transcript
- Arch Obler's Lights Out. Everybody, it is later then you thing. This is arch Obler bringing you another in our series of stories of the unusual. And once again we caution you. These lights out stories are definitely not for the timid soul. So we tell you calmly and very sincerely, if you fright me, easily turn off your radio. Now listen to me. Now, a few light years and generations ago, as I introduced to a very patient lights out audience, my Peach Weird play special to Hollywood. Most of you have heard of the new style Hollywood premiere, where airplanes full of Hollywood celebrities fly to some town for the first showing of their new picture. The stars in the movie are displayed in a furious burst of glory, and then they rush back to Hollywood again to start their next super epic. Well tonight, let's tell you about the road back from one of these premier excursions, in this particular case, a most unusual road. The scene a transport airplane moving through the sky at high speed. A very pompous looking individual stands talking to the pilot. Now, look here, pilot, can't you make this thing go faster? Sorry? What you say? Take those infernal earphones or whatever they are, off your head and listen to me. I said, can't you make this thing go faster? One hundred and fifty miles an hour isn't exactly walking, mister, Now, don't get impertinent. I charted this special plane for speed. You understand speed, not to just go dardling along through air. I'll tell him about it when he comes in. Now, now, look here, do you realize who you're talking to him? Dear mister. I'll be the first to admit you're a big shot. But when you're bucking a fifty mile wind and still making one hundred and fifty miles an hour, believe me, that's pretty good. Why you now, why don't you go back in the cabin and sit down and enjoy yourself like a good fellow. No, not, look here. You can't tell me what to do. You can't coming, darling, coming a pet when you're being do I have to spit along every time I want to talk to you? All right, darling? All right, then I'm here. You tell him to hurry out. Yes, yes, everything's taking care of Yeah, that's what Tuesday MC nineteen calling Glensale. I'm nineteen calls Hello, Joe, how is it? I don't know why I went on this trip? There? Yeah, publicity, the farmers like everything was normal her No, Loana, Darling, me just tell me where can I get a drink? Well? What are you going for? Anywhere? Ye? Anybody? Okay, tell them to get the studio. Brian's band ready, we'll be setting down a couple hours, okay, MC nineteen sonning off. You heard what I said? How many times do I have to say it? You heard me the first time? If not for me being in at that picture would sink so loud. The only way anyone could go see it would be with one of those gas things on that phone. Oh but Darling, be reasonable. Any picture that next three hundred thousand dollars the first week because I'm in at that fly because I am in us. Isn't that right? Bob? Huh? What'd you saying? Oh? For Pete's sake, take your nose out of that racing farm and listen to me? Will you listen to yourselfield? I fall I'm busy. You tell me how long do I have to put up with this lowly imitation of Allow? All right, Mark, it's all right. I can take it thousand a week. You're gonna let him talk to me like that? Well he hasn't said anything, he's reading my mind. Why you too bid, little four flesh? Let me? Do you mean fall flush your wife? Not for me shoving your name in every new spaper in the country, you'd be back in that laundry. Mark, Why did you hear that? Now, Bob, watch yourself? You sure fire me go on? So I'm gonna work for Warner Fire, I mean I'm gonna have some decent pictures of God a time. No, Bob, don't go too far after here my picture Turkey three hundred thousand dollars the first week. Why ask me? Why exploitation? That's it? Why without my publicity, you wouldn't be back in that laundry, you'd be in it. Why you little squirt, you I'll scratch your eyes out. You lay a hand on me and I'll slap you down to her. Oh you're fired, you hear me, Bob tired? Why you big bag of winds? How do you think you're fire drawing out? Why I'll go to JB tomorrow head and cut your heart out. Fired? Why you're a fugitive from that laundry that she used to watch. That way, I can walk into a dozen jobs tomorrow morning. I'll run you out of the devil. I'll kick you in the face. Yes, you get another job in Hollywood, ahead, laughed A crazy pilot. And what's he doing? I'm telling him the storm? Crazy fool climbing like that. Don't just stand there, go I'm giving the devil all right, I'm going all right, ain't you planning? You crazy? All right? Has a climb storman who cares about the storm? You get us home? Do you understand? Okay, you're playing for it. Yeah, that's it's for you from over the radio hub. All right, all right, the handle? What is it my for me? No? Tell me? Yeah? Yeah me? What's up there? Mack? What's the matter with you? Mouth looking like a fish? Read it? The says that John Webster killed himself. Say you're kidding, no, no, no, see for yourself. John Webster, young novelist, committed suicide one PM. I never thought he'd do it. I didn't neither killing himself just because we changed it? You laughing? Why not? No, Lorna darling? After all, what two wise guys? Neither one of you has got as many brains as the less side of my Pekinese. What okay, let's have it do the great mister Crean, the publicity won the needles. Yes, Lona, what are you getting at? So he did so. Instead of looking down your noses, you two ought to be standing on your heads. Oh am, I the picture getting national released this week and the sap who writes the words blows his brains out and I'm supposed to cry. Huh say I get it? Call out the marine, Lona? You you mean that? Now? He can't bother us with an injunction. Who's thinking about injunctions? He couldn't stop the picture anyway, you said yourself? He signed away? All right? Then what oh Bob, you tell him? It's terrific, Mark, don't you get it? Huh? So we had the premiere in Chicago, so all right, it's fucked. Don't you study again? Carry wasn't you all? The director was no good, The film was no good. The cut has got the story loud stuff. The critics all at belly aches. What's the difference? What the reason was? The picture was a flopper room laid eggs all the way up and down State Street. Get to the point I passed it all day. Don't you get it? Mark, the author of the novel we made the film out of, blows his top. Why ask me? Why? I don't have to ask you. The kid told me yesterday right in the hotel, ruined his life work. He said, yeah, yeah, that's what he said. But that won't be what I'll say. Uh, but who did you know? For Kee's sake, Mark, shut your mouth and listen to the guy. For the first time in a year. He's got a good idea, my idea, that's what you think. I listen mine. With this angle, we're gonna turn the picture into a gold mine. Say it, say it, I'll say it. The reason that crazy kid killed himself was because the picture was so terrific. He was done finished. Yeah yeah, his life work comes to life on the silver screen. So the boy genius bows out. Don't you get it? But but that isn't true? Oh for the linan mean, who will believe you? It's it's crazy? Will you listen to the guy on the crazy Sure a story like that, your newspaper will believe it, Oh won't they? How about if you have a letter the kid wrote you just before he you know, didn't. That's all right, But he didn't write me any such letter. Oh, Lona, you tell him? Look, Mark, what are you trying to do? Give an imitation of dopey? Uh? Did the savage d have to write a letter? There are plenty of guys you got at the studio who write your letter like that for ten bucks and give you a change for five a fair? Oh? Oh is right? Why the kid thumping himself off? Some natural? And who thought of it first? You tell me? Storm? Kind of screwy pilot we got? Oh? I don't just stand there, do something? All right? All right, I'll talk so doc right? Well, I can't find the script blood my turn to gets out of this geez? Did you too set it? I told you I didn't want to go to Chicago? What more? Turn against out of this storm? Why can you hear me? I'll go leave. Listen with climbing climbing? So what does that mean? He's taking us up above the storm? Oh? Why isn't he hurry? I hate punters? What all right, darling? It's all right? Oh? What's all right? What he's getting us up over the top of the store. Yeah, Like I told you, what does a buzzer, get us into this far in the first thing. Walk if you don't get him fired on us. There we are hit the light again. You look at those clouds down there? So who cares? Oh? What I get for Scotch. We'll be home soon. You can't even see the ground. It's like a confet. Will you shut up? Who cares about clouds? Listen? Touching friends? Host talking to you. Did you hear what he says? No? Go start again, the two of you. I've had all I can stand these three days you've had. How would you listen to the guy who was pulled and pushed around from everyone from the Cicero fan Club Number one to those stop it exhibitors to those lousy repartments. Wait a minute, huh, what's your marria? I got an idea and I listen. That's screw the author. When we land, I'll have a wire sense. We'll have the body, scent of the coats and buryment the studios expense. Huh, Yes, sort of a state funeral for the author, a lot of Douglas's greatest via that's all right. Oh, I don't know. Maybe they won't, Oh won't The kid didn't have anybody so we'll do the honors, say special car all across the country, make every news service in the world. I don't know. I don't know, Marbid, you know, Marbid? I don't know. That's the trouble. You don't know the first good idea this Lily. Wait a minute, you start getting autistic or something. But let me tell you. Hey, what's the matter with you? Hey? Mark, I'm talking to you. Listen, what, Bob, what's the matter with you? Two engines? Huh? The engine it stopped? So what we're landing? What's the matter with you too? Sat shut out the engine because we're landing. No pilot, pilot, I don't know, I don't what is this? Mark? Hea? We are landing off? What did he get so excited about me? The engines were sustained? That's so what? We're not you in for an hour? Yet? Something wrong the way? No, let me talk. We're putting cut off your shut up. We're not landing. See we're not landing. But but the the engine they stopped. We must be landing. Flash you shut up. You you can't talk to her that way. Who do you think you're talking? Pools? When you're shut up? I look, look, I tell you what the indicator airspeed indicator. We're not falling? Mark what you saying? Listen, I'm telling you we're not falling. Engines dead and we're not falling. Your fools. What are you looking at me like that for? Don't you understand we're hanging, just hanging in the air. Hang eh, you dirty face buzzing. What are you trying to pull? Why are you trying to pull? Oh? Dead, just hanging in there? Hang eh. Listen, the three I've been around, they pull all kinds of fancy tricks on me. Well, if this is a gig, I don't like it. Do you hear me? I don't like it? Now, get me done out of here, Bob, Bob, he's past house. Come on back in the cabin. Let us sit down. Mister mock him, you too, Bobby, He'll be all right. Come on, hang you there, This is the case, isn't it? Come me? Isn't it some movie? Oh you've got any movie? Come rest your twit in my arm? Cut it out, William, don't tell me what's happening? What father passed out? Mike looking like just mouthy. You gotta you've gotta tell me. We are moving aren't we No, you liar, you dirty liar. We are we are, Robert. Look down there, dirty liars, right a scared Look see on the clouds down there, our shadows standing still. We're not moving. Get that through your head. We're hanging in space. I no, m h M all right, and just leave me alone, get your head, leave me alone, I tell you. But you all sitting around looking at me for me, I passed out? All right, you're all just as scared as I am. You know what, y'all? You mock you're scared? Your face green? Answer me, you're scared, don't you hang h he's awfully or nuts you holda you're scared too, munches, Why don't you shut up? Pilot? You you're scared green, two munches. It's not me alone? You answer me? You I'm gonna shut you up. I'm scared. I'm scared. I'm scared, all right, Bob, all right, all right now, all right, don't talk barre your heads. Yeah that's right, pilot, Sam, Yeah, what time is it? Five? The radio? What's the US? Tried it a hundred times? That is it? Where're gonna be looking at what you're talking about? About? Just try not to think, Sam, Yeah, how long have you been? An hour? Only that seems like a millionaire? Watch says only an hour? Mike, Mike listeners, Mike, I'm talking to you. Hang in air. I wish I was like my kids. Yeah, so scared, can't see or hear or think. Look. Hm, he's gone to slip. Bob, Yeah, wore himself out of crime. Like, how do you? Nothing's funny? I guess not who great? But I got funny thoughts in my head. What a minute ago I was thinking about when I was a kid. Wanna hear about when I was a kid? Why not? Bob here and all the rest of the publicity guys have wrote written so much junk about me being the only daughter of you know, poor but respectable small town people. I almost got to thinking it was true. Yeah, would you believe it? I paid some wise guy over on Sunset Boulevard a thousand bucks for a coat of arms of the family to hang up in the hall. You know, one of those fancy shields of lines crawling all over things. Should have had a couple of beer bottles. I don't did a line. Yeah, you wanna know my real name? See what's the difference? Beer bottles. Yeah, beer bottles and the smell of the laundry coming up the air shaft and a lot of dirts. That's what I remember from when I was a kid. Sam. Yeah, I just wanted to hear you talk. Oh what was I talking about? Oh? Yeah, I was thinking something funny about when I was a kid. When it was hot at night, I used to lie on my back on the roof, look at the clouds and make off. I was just sort of hanging in the air. Understand, I want that funny now. Gravity? What dices? You said? Gravity? Why? I was thinking what gravity is pulling us down? Well, I was thinking of what's pulling us up? There aren't any answers, no, no, no answer. When I was that kid, I found answers. Yeah, how to get along, how to get out of the smell and the dirt. Real answers. They took me along way five thousand a week, five year contract, no options. I did alright with my answers. Here is one answer. I haven't gone cause there isn't any answer. Maybe there is. Yeah, yeah, you listen to me. Supposing I listen to you, I don't know how to talk. Oh you just go ahead for a whole hour I've been trying to figure things out, so there is any real answer, hm, I mean that Dad's up like a column of figures on a slide room when you're trying to figure out the stress on a wing. Nothing like that. But kind of screwy ideas come to me. Ah, I talk about it, go on and just a bozo. Ever since I've been able to stand on my own feet, everything's kind to be able to add up, or it just doesn't mean anything to me. When I was a kid, well, well, when I was a kid, I really had the well, like you said, the poor but respectable parents, you know, the kind they believe in somebody up there and somebody down below, and good and eve 'em, all the rest of 'em. Funny you thinking about when you were a kid, and me thinking the same thing you said. You had to answer. Yeah, it's like this. I heard the three of you talking all the way from the coast to Chicago, and I'll back again, talking about nothing but yourselves, each one of you, nothing meanly, anything but yourselves. You would like this up here. I know I wouldn't be able to say this, but oh why not say it? You? You making more money in a week than the average guy with the family sweats out his insides for on a year. But instead of the money making me understand anything, it's made you understand less than a blind kid walking in the dark. Everything's for you. The world's just a big movie screen. Everybody in it just there to sit up and look at you. Yeah. I heard somebody wrote a book. You bought it, made a picture out of it. Maybe it was an honest book, but you didn't buy it to be honest. You bought it to make dough. So the kid blew his brains out. Even dead, he couldn't get away from you. Yeah, you're gonna use his dead body to make you more money. Yeah, dead or alive, nothing means anything to you. There's no world, but you're a screely world. Everybody all over the world can crawl on the ground hiding from bombs, can be starved and watch their kids starve and die on bobed wire fighting for something they don't know much about, and drowning the sea. And it don't mean anything to you, none of it, as long as each of you can hold on to what you've got. Yeah, the three of you acting as if you weren't made of the same flesh and blood as the rest of us. Is making a lot of money and seeing your name in the paper a lot and getting a lot of applause to get right off the earth. Maybe something somebody decided you weren't fifth of the earth. You cry, you asked me. I told you I was in a picture one the girl got in a jam. She didn't know how to pray with you. Well, that was in the picture. It is really yeah, if anybody told me a couple of hours ago that all with Mark's sitting there out of his head, Bob me sitting here listening to the kind of thing you asked me to you tone, it was a long about that kid who died. I'm sorry about that even thinking about it. The engine. We've gotta wake up you hear. Everything's all right, all right, I know my publicity seems like this isn't good a span. I'm not arguing with you, alright. Spread a screwy thing like this, he'll be reporting the country behold in his nose, some screwy it's for heaven's sake. Well, just stopped talking about it for the last hour. My head's starting to go around it's forgotten, he finished. So whatever it was, we'll forget from the way. From that pilot. You talked to him, sure, I'm sure he won't talk. He wants to eat, don't he, So he won't talk. Got everything fixed? Huh, well, Framadonna's talking again. Ah, now, Lona, you understand, nobody's gonna know about this. Like like Bob says, crazy publicity is bad publicity, and this all was crazy was I'll say, hey, look we're over the airport. Good, good drink? Do I need a drink? Bath? Well, I'm gonna swim. I'm a terrible experience, terrible, but all's well. That ends well, Elona, a terrible experience, but now finished. Everything's just the same, Helona, everything's just the same. I wonder MC nineteen coming in, MC nineteen, coming in, Hello John, Yeah I had a little trouble. Wow fact yeah, engine trouble. Yeah, everything's back to normal now yeah, everybody, Okay, everything's just the same. I wonder it is later then you sing