Latest / Motivation Mindset Podcast / Grow Through What You Go Through: Overcome Life’s Challenges

Transcript

Grow Through What You Go Through: Overcome Life’s Challenges · Motivation Mindset Podcast

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: I realized that God wasn't going to give me a
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: get out of jail free card. And from the time
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: I was born and to the time I was nineteen
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: years old, my life had these hurdles. I constantly hit obstacles,
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: obstacle after obstacle after obstacle, and I had to figure
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: out how to manage suffering, how to deal with it
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: because it'd be part of my life forever, at least
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: that's what I thought. So in order to deal with it,
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: I had to be able to conquer it and overcome
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: it and deal with it and know that in this
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: suffering there has to be some kind of growth with
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: every obstacle.
• 0:36
  Speaker 2: I look at his friction.
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: Now, without friction, there is no growth. You have to
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: have friction in your life to grow. So I started
• 0:44
  Speaker 1: looking at all these different things versus the woe is
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: Me mentality, like.
• 0:47
  Speaker 2: Oh my God, look at my life. My life.
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: So I come from this family, I'm being beaten, I'm
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: being abused mentally, physically. I started looking at it as
• 0:56
  Speaker 1: a perfect trial ground. So I put upside down and say, Okay,
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: I'm suffering tremendously mentally.
• 1:05
  Speaker 2: Use this to your advantage versus your disadvantage.
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: So that's why I did versus looking at it as like,
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: oh my god, what was me? I'm never gonna get
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: out of here. I looked at it, Okay, hang on
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: a second, Hang on a second. If I can overcome this,
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: if I can find some power in this, some way
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: to get through this, that right there would be the
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: fuel for the rest of my life.
• 1:28
  Speaker 2: And so I found great strength and suffering, great strength
• 1:31
  Speaker 2: in it. Because why through.
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: All of that it started to callous my mind over
• 1:36
  Speaker 1: the victim's mentality. This whole thing about suffering. Yeah, it
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: sucks really bad, really really bad. But we all live
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: on this side of suffering, on this side, this nice
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: box that's very comfortable that we know when everything's gonna happen.
• 1:54
  Speaker 2: We're in it. It's good, we know how everything's gonna
• 1:57
  Speaker 2: turn out.
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: It's to a few people who are willing to go
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: on this side of suffering, and once they get through that,
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: Ask him how he feels now, his bind how far he.
• 2:09
  Speaker 3: Grew in that short period of time. He grew so
• 2:14
  Speaker 3: much more than the normal person because he was willing.
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: To go outside himself. Because on the other end of
• 2:21
  Speaker 2: suffering is greatness. It's not over here.
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: So a whole bunch of us we put ourselves in
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: this great.
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: Box, and in that box there's no suffering in it.
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: So what we do is.
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: Result to ourselves from greatness. So for me, for instance,
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: I was three hundred damn pounds at one time in
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: my life. Spray for cockroaches made one thousand dollars a month.
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: I was living in that box.
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: I would sometimes look over the box and I saw
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: all hell suffering storms, avalanches, tornadoes.
• 2:56
  Speaker 2: I don't wanna go over there, but I knew if
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: I can get do that mentally.
• 3:00
  Speaker 3: On the other side, wasn't hurt eighty five pound persons
• 3:02
  Speaker 3: in Navy seal with through ranger school.
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: Only person to do this, only person do that, only
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: person do this.
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: Well, that's do all of that.
• 3:10
  Speaker 3: All that I have to go through.
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: So you peek over the box and you go back
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: in and say, oh, I'm okay being three hundred pounds
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: making two thousand dollars a month. I'm okay over here.
• 3:20
  Speaker 2: And on the other side is when you start to
• 3:23
  Speaker 2: really start your journey. People think they start their journey
• 3:26
  Speaker 2: because they're born.
• 3:27
  Speaker 3: No, there's a lot of people in graves who have
• 3:30
  Speaker 3: been for one hundred years and.
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: Have never started their real journey. Your real journey starts.
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: When you go outside that box and you start climbing
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: mountains and start climbing mountains, and you think you get
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: the top of the mountain.
• 3:43
  Speaker 2: You go down there outside of it, think I'm here,
• 3:45
  Speaker 2: and you look at there's another fountain.
• 3:48
  Speaker 3: And it goes on and it goes on and it
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  Speaker 3: goes on, and just when you're getting ready to quit,
• 3:55
  Speaker 3: you crash that final mountain and you get down and
• 3:57
  Speaker 3: you look and.
• 3:58
  Speaker 2: There you are, and it starts to make sense to you.
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: Then some criticize my level of passion, but I'm not
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: down with the prevailing mentalities that tend to dominate American
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: society these days, the ones that tell us to go
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: with the flow, or invite us to learn how to
• 4:19
  Speaker 1: get more with less effort, that shortcut boost. The reason
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: I embrace my own obsessions and demand and desire more
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: of myself is because I've learned that it's only when
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: I push beyond pain and suffering past my perceived limitations,
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  Speaker 1: that I'm capable of accomplishing more physically and mentally in
• 4:39
  Speaker 1: endurance races, but also in life as a whole.
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: And I believe the same is true for you. The
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: human body is like a stock car.
• 4:49
  Speaker 1: We may look different on the outside, but under the hood,
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  Speaker 1: we all have huge reservoirs of potential and a governor
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: impeding us and reaching our maximum velocity. In a car,
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: the governor limits the flow of fuel and air so
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: it doesn't burn too hot, which places the ceiling our performance.
• 5:08
  Speaker 2: It's a hardware issue.
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: The governor can easily be removed, and if you disable yours,
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: watch your car rocket beyond one hundred and thirty miles
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: per hour.
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: It's a souther process. In the human animal.
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: Our governor is buried deep in our minds, intertwined with
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  Speaker 1: our very identity. It knows what and who we love
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: and hate, as read our whole life story, and forms
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: the way we see ourselves and how we'd like to
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: be seen. It's the software that delivers personalized feedback in
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: the form of pain and exhaustion, but also fear and insecurity,
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  Speaker 1: and it uses all of that to encourage us to
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: stop before we risk it all.
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  Speaker 2: But here's the thing. It doesn't have absolute control.
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  Speaker 1: Unlike the governor and an engine, ours can't stop us
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: unless we buy into its book and agree to quit. Sadly,
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: most of us give up. We've only given around forty
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: percent of our maximum effort. Even when we feel like
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: we've reached our absolute limit, we still have sixty percent
• 6:07
  Speaker 1: more to give.
• 6:09
  Speaker 2: That's the governor in action. Once you know that to.
• 6:12
  Speaker 1: Be true, it's simply a matter of stretching your pain tolerance,
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: letting go of your identity in all.
• 6:19
  Speaker 2: Your self limiting.
• 6:21
  Speaker 1: Stories, so you can get to sixty percent than eighty percent.
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: And beyond without giving up.
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: I call this the forty rule, and the reason it's
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: so powerful is that if you follow it, you will
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  Speaker 1: unlock your mind to new levels of performance and excellence
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: in sports and in life, and your rewards will run
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: far deeper than mere material success. The forty rule can
• 6:47
  Speaker 1: be applied to everything we do, because in life, almost
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: nothing will turn out exactly as we hope. There are
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: always challenges, and whether we are at work or school,
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: or feeling tested within our most intimate or important relationships,
• 7:00
  Speaker 1: we will all be attempts to walk away from commitments,
• 7:03
  Speaker 1: give up on our goals and dreams, and sell our
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: own happiness short at some point, because we will feel empty,
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: like we have no more to give when we haven't
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: tapped even half of the treasure buried deep in our minds, hearts,
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: and souls.
• 7:22
  Speaker 2: Never pick the.
• 7:23
  Speaker 1: Easy road, never, never, And it always goes back to
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: kind of that the hero mentality. Never pick the easy
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: road ever in your life. That is the one road
• 7:38
  Speaker 1: that is doom It is doomed if you want something
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: like six minute abs all these different things, if you
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: want it so fast, you may achieve what you want it,
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: but you want the permanent fix. The permanent fix comes
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: from the hard road.
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  Speaker 2: The hard road gives you permanent results. The easy road
• 8:02
  Speaker 2: gives you the quick fix.
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  Speaker 1: You will go back to where you started on the
• 8:06
  Speaker 1: easy route.
• 8:08
  Speaker 2: That hard route.
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  Speaker 1: Is so permanent that it ends up callousing you everywhere, everywhere.
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  Speaker 1: You can keep a six pack forever because you know
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: the work that goes into it. I know how it
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: feels to be approaching an energetic dead end. I've been
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: there too many times to count. I understand the temptation
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  Speaker 1: to sell short, but I also know that impulse is
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: driven by your mind's desire.
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  Speaker 2: For comfort, and it's not telling you the truth. It's
• 8:36
  Speaker 2: your identity trying to find sanctuary and not help your growth.
• 8:40
  Speaker 1: It's looking for status. Quote not reaching for greatness or
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: seeking wholeness. But the software update that you need to
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: shut your governor down is no supersonic downloading. It takes
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: twenty years to gain twenty years of experience, and the
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: only way to move beyond your forty percent is to
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  Speaker 1: callous your mind day after day, which means.
• 9:02
  Speaker 2: You will have to chase pain like it's your damn job.
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  Speaker 1: Imagine you're a boxer and on your first day in
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  Speaker 1: the ring you take one on your chin.
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  Speaker 2: It's gonna hurt like in hell.
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  Speaker 1: But at year ten, being a boxer, you won't be
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  Speaker 1: stopped by one punch.
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  Speaker 2: You'll be able to absorb twelve.
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  Speaker 1: Rounds of getting beat the down and come back the
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  Speaker 1: very next.
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  Speaker 2: Day and fight again.
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  Speaker 1: It's not that the punch has lost power. Your opponents
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  Speaker 1: will be even stronger. The change has happened within your brain.
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  Speaker 1: You've calloused your mind. Over a period of time, your
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  Speaker 1: tolerance for mental and physical suffering will have expanded because
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  Speaker 1: your software will have learned that you can take.
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  Speaker 2: A hell of a lot more than one punch.
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  Speaker 1: And if you stay with any task that is trying
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  Speaker 1: to beat you down, you will reap rewards. Not a fighter,
• 9:53
  Speaker 1: say you like to run, but have a broken pinky toe.
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  Speaker 2: I'll bet if you continue running on it, pretty soon
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  Speaker 2: you'll be able to run on broke legs.
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: Sounds impossible, right, I know it's true because I've run
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: on broken legs, and that knowledge helped me endure all
• 10:09
  Speaker 1: manner of agonies on the ultra circuit, which has revealed
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: a clear spring of self confidence that I drink from
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: whenever my.
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  Speaker 2: Tank is dry.
• 10:18
  Speaker 1: But nobody taps their reserve sixty percent right away or
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: all at once. The first step is to remember that
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  Speaker 1: your initial blast of pain and fatigue is your governor talking.
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: Once you do that, you are in control of the
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: dialogue in your mind, and you can remind yourself that
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: you are not as drained as you think, that you
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: haven't given as your own, not even close. Buying into
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: that will keep you in the fight, and that's worth
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: an extra five percent.
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  Speaker 2: Of course, that's easier red than done.
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  Speaker 1: It wasn't easy to begin the fourth lap of the
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: Hurt one hundred because I knew how much it would hurt.
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: And when you are feeling dead and buried, dehydrated, wrung out,
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: and torn the fuck up at forty percent, finding that
• 11:01
  Speaker 1: extra sixty percent feels impossible.
• 11:03
  Speaker 2: I didn't want my suffering to continue. Nobody does.
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: That's why the line fatigue makes cowards of us. All
• 11:09
  Speaker 1: is truish. Mind you, I didn't know anything about the forty.
• 11:12
  Speaker 2: Rule that day. The hurt one hundred is when I
• 11:15
  Speaker 2: first started contemplate it.
• 11:17
  Speaker 1: But I had hit the wall many times before, and
• 11:20
  Speaker 1: I had learned to stay present and open minded enough
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: to recalibrate my goals.
• 11:25
  Speaker 2: Even at my lowest.
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: I knew that staying in the fight is always the
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: hardest and most rewarding first step.
• 11:33
  Speaker 2: Of course, it's easy to.
• 11:35
  Speaker 1: Be open minded when you leave yoga class and are
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: taking a stroll by the beach, But when you're suffering,
• 11:40
  Speaker 1: keep an open mind is hard work. The same is
• 11:44
  Speaker 1: true if you're facing a daunting challenge on the job.
• 11:47
  Speaker 2: Or at school.
• 11:48
  Speaker 1: Maybe you're tackling one hundred question tests and know that
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: you brick the first fifty. At that point, it's extremely
• 11:55
  Speaker 1: difficult to maintain the necessary discipline to force yourself to
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: keep taking the test seriously. It's also imperative that you
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: find it, because in every failure there is something to
• 12:05
  Speaker 1: be gained, even if it's only practice. For the next
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: test you'll have to take because that next test is coming.
• 12:11
  Speaker 2: That's a guarantee.
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: I had a starting point, and the starting point was
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: this very scared, immature, fragile kid. But through figuring out
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: this fragile kid, I found out through all this muck,
• 12:28
  Speaker 1: this can come out the other end. Person that's four
• 12:31
  Speaker 1: thousand and thirty pull ups, who runs miles and miles
• 12:34
  Speaker 1: and miles at a time. But we all have these
• 12:36
  Speaker 1: abilities not just to run and do pull ups, but
• 12:39
  Speaker 1: these abilities that once we go back into our dark
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: holes that a lot of us have, a lot of
• 12:44
  Speaker 1: us come from, you know, insecurities.
• 12:46
  Speaker 2: A lot of issues, but we don't want to visit
• 12:47
  Speaker 2: that place. Place is scary, place is something that we
• 12:50
  Speaker 2: want to forget about.
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: I had the courage, finally to go back in there
• 12:56
  Speaker 1: and organize it, get it organized in my mind and
• 12:59
  Speaker 1: figure out.
• 13:00
  Speaker 2: You know, where to start from.
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: So but the journey led me to the so called
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: superhuman stuff that I do now.
• 13:08
  Speaker 2: For me, my routine is every.
• 13:09
  Speaker 1: Night I stretch out, and I stretch out for two
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: or three hours every single night without failure. And while
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: I'm stretching out, I'm thinking about my plan for the
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: next day. Now I'm thinking about all these different obstacles
• 13:22
  Speaker 1: that may come up. So basically a lot of us
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: aren't prepared for life. We get up willy Nilly and
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: his hope life is gonna happen.
• 13:30
  Speaker 2: It is gonna happen. What's gonna happen? With the prepared
• 13:33
  Speaker 2: mind or unprepared mind. Most people attack life with the
• 13:37
  Speaker 2: unprepared mind.
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: What I do is I try to account for all
• 13:42
  Speaker 1: things that could happen, might happen, probably will happen, and
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: then the unknowns. So basically I can't account for everything,
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: but I do know there could be some things that
• 13:53
  Speaker 1: come up in life that you need to be ready
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: for it. I know for a fact I'm not gonna
• 13:57
  Speaker 1: run to work out tomorrow. Therefore I'm preparing my mind
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: for that. I don't want to do that. I know
• 14:03
  Speaker 1: tomorrow will come with some difficult decisions to make. It
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: may come with getting a phone call saying someone died,
• 14:10
  Speaker 1: this happened, that happened. I'm always preparing myself, not in
• 14:13
  Speaker 1: a morbid way, but just like look, man, be ready
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: for life. Don't let life just start attacking you left
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: and right. Make sure that you start to build a
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: mental armor. So then you're ready for life, and that
• 14:27
  Speaker 1: comes with a very physical way, and the physical helps
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: out to mental