Latest / Aired Out / Sweethearts & Heroes - U.S. Marine Corps Major and 3-time combat veteran Chad Althser

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Sweethearts & Heroes - U.S. Marine Corps Major and 3-time combat veteran Chad Althser · Aired Out

• 1:38
  Speaker 1: All.
• 1:38
  Speaker 2: I gotta give a shout out this morning to some
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: new followers, Lynn and peacham Allen in Saint Jay and
• 1:47
  Speaker 2: Andrew right next door in Berlin. You got the aired
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: out podcast from Flying the Wall Productions. Good morning to
• 1:55
  Speaker 2: You're live on Facebook, We're live on YouTube, We're streamed
• 1:59
  Speaker 2: everywhere you get podcasts, and yes we are on the web.
• 2:03
  Speaker 2: If you haven't checked out the site, please do. Woodland
• 2:06
  Speaker 2: Studios put it together aired out VT dot com and
• 2:10
  Speaker 2: it hasn't been around that long, but I love it.
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: It looks great. It is Wednesday, Sweethearts and Heroes Day
• 2:21
  Speaker 2: today and man, do we have a superhero that is
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: standing by? I want to give a shout out to
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: Optical Expressions. I gotta get over there. Don't forget the
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: big sale on sunglasses this month at Optical Expressions, twenty
• 2:37
  Speaker 2: five percent off all in stock prescription and non prescription
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: sunglasses while supplies last. So don't put it off. Don't wait.
• 2:48
  Speaker 2: They're open Monday for Friday from eight to six, twenty
• 2:51
  Speaker 2: four seven Oe Berlin dot com. Qualityye care that you
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: can see that is Optical Expressions, fourth floor of the
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: planet for block here in Barry and to ask yourself.
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: When was the last time you had an eye exam
• 3:05
  Speaker 2: two two three, twenty ninety To get on the schedule,
• 3:11
  Speaker 2: don't wait for this every Wednesday morning. Love to check
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: in with Deb Phillips over at the World She is.
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: She and Gary both are two of the busiest folks
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: that I know. And they put together, they put together
• 3:31
  Speaker 2: this incredible newspaper. They've been doing it for how many
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: years now, Deb, fifty one years? Seriously, seriously, it's amazing. Wow,
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: today's paper it comes out. Actually, it's it's been delivered
• 3:47
  Speaker 2: right now. Right.
• 3:48
  Speaker 3: Chris is out there, Yeah, Chris, Jim and Paul, everybody's
• 3:53
  Speaker 3: out to delivering the paper.
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: What are we what are we looking forward to seeing
• 3:57
  Speaker 2: in the World paper today, Debb.
• 4:00
  Speaker 3: So we have the schedule for the Farmers Night concerts
• 4:04
  Speaker 3: at the State House.
• 4:05
  Speaker 2: Oh, I forgot about that.
• 4:07
  Speaker 3: Yes, And these are over one hundred year tradition. They're
• 4:11
  Speaker 3: on Wednesday nights during the Legislature at seven thirty pm.
• 4:17
  Speaker 3: They're free, open to the public. There's a great lineup
• 4:21
  Speaker 3: of concerts and events this year that you know start
• 4:26
  Speaker 3: I think it's next Wednesday, and then go through into
• 4:32
  Speaker 3: early April.
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: Fantastic. Yeah, man, that's that's it. That's been going on
• 4:39
  Speaker 2: for how.
• 4:39
  Speaker 3: Long now, over one hundred years?
• 4:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah, incredible. Yeah, kind of a way to break up
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: a little bit of maybe some some tension or some
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: stress and just relaxing into some music, right yeah.
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah.
• 4:56
  Speaker 3: Lots lots of good stuff, you know, even like the
• 4:58
  Speaker 3: Vermont Philharmonic is good to be there. I mean, you know,
• 5:02
  Speaker 3: really really good good events this year.
• 5:05
  Speaker 2: Anything else in the world today.
• 5:07
  Speaker 3: So we have money saving coupons. You can save on
• 5:12
  Speaker 3: lunch at Casa Azteca, you can save on pizzas and
• 5:16
  Speaker 3: subs it's simply homemade. Plus there's oil changes and Vermont
• 5:20
  Speaker 3: State inspections that you can save on.
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: Great stuff.
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 5:24
  Speaker 2: And always some great reading in there too, you guys
• 5:27
  Speaker 2: spotlight so many wonderful things happening in our community.
• 5:31
  Speaker 3: Dep Yeah, well that's that. We are all about local.
• 5:35
  Speaker 3: That's what's most important to us. It's just you know,
• 5:37
  Speaker 3: the local community and promoting the community very important.
• 5:41
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Again, I get most of my material from you guys.
• 5:47
  Speaker 2: Absolutely rely on the world every single Wednesday. What about
• 5:50
  Speaker 2: if people want to advertise with you, it's vt dashworld
• 5:53
  Speaker 2: dot com, right.
• 5:55
  Speaker 3: That's the website. Yes, that's correct, and if you want
• 5:58
  Speaker 3: to email, it's sales at bthypenworld dot com.
• 6:03
  Speaker 2: Great stuff. Listen you and Gary. You're gonna get in
• 6:06
  Speaker 2: here soon.
• 6:06
  Speaker 3: Right, Yes, yes, I saw your note. I didn't get
• 6:11
  Speaker 3: a chance to check with Gary yet, so I'll get
• 6:14
  Speaker 3: back to you on that.
• 6:15
  Speaker 2: I look forward to it so much. Thank you so much, Deb,
• 6:18
  Speaker 2: Thank you JD. Enjoy the rest of your day. Deb Phillips.
• 6:21
  Speaker 2: Right there from the world. Hey, look, we're at forty
• 6:24
  Speaker 2: degrees right now. We're gonna warm up to about forty
• 6:28
  Speaker 2: three later today, maybe a brief rain shower. Rain tonight
• 6:32
  Speaker 2: thirty five. Not sure how much snow we're going to
• 6:35
  Speaker 2: get out of this thing, But tomorrow they're saying thirty seven,
• 6:38
  Speaker 2: some rain changing to snow in the afternoon. How much snow?
• 6:44
  Speaker 2: Not much at this point. I think these temperatures, being
• 6:48
  Speaker 2: what they are, so mild that it's really going to
• 6:51
  Speaker 2: be a liquid event, not so much a frozen event. However,
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: by the time Friday gets here, we're looking at sun
• 6:58
  Speaker 2: and clouds both, but time highs only around seventeen Friday,
• 7:03
  Speaker 2: so back to the deep freeze. Keep that in mind,
• 7:06
  Speaker 2: all right. This guy who is coming on with me
• 7:11
  Speaker 2: right now. I am so so honored, and I have
• 7:14
  Speaker 2: heard so much about chat from sweethearts and heroes. Man,
• 7:21
  Speaker 2: you like Tom has been chewing my ear off about you, brother.
• 7:28
  Speaker 4: I appreciate that Tom only knows most.
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: Of the good stuff.
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: So that might be why Chad Alfaizer am I saying it? Right?
• 7:37
  Speaker 2: That's right, man, you are. You're a tough dude from
• 7:44
  Speaker 2: what I've heard. Three combat tours in Iraq and Afghanistan.
• 7:53
  Speaker 2: Three that's right, Yeah, you're You're a major in the
• 7:59
  Speaker 2: Marine Corps. When were you over there? Two in that?
• 8:04
  Speaker 4: So my first excuse me, My first Iraq deployment was
• 8:07
  Speaker 4: two thousand and three. I was a lieutenant in the
• 8:10
  Speaker 4: first Marine Division Artillery Battalion and we left in January
• 8:16
  Speaker 4: and went into Iraq in March of two thousand and three,
• 8:20
  Speaker 4: that was the March to Baghdad, and came home, had
• 8:25
  Speaker 4: a full fall training schedule, and found out about halfway
• 8:29
  Speaker 4: through that that we were going to go back to
• 8:30
  Speaker 4: Iraq because things were deteriorating and we'd be doing a
• 8:34
  Speaker 4: provisional security mission. So I did that in four and
• 8:38
  Speaker 4: actually left that deployment at about five and a half months.
• 8:41
  Speaker 4: I PCs to a like a new command duty station
• 8:44
  Speaker 4: and they weren't keeping people on stop loss at that point,
• 8:48
  Speaker 4: and then some different billets in the Marine Corps some
• 8:51
  Speaker 4: formal school education training, and then deployed Afghanistan in two
• 8:56
  Speaker 4: thousand and nine.
• 9:00
  Speaker 2: Safe to say that you experienced a whole hell of
• 9:06
  Speaker 2: a lot of stuff over there, chat.
• 9:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that is safe to say. And it's interesting.
• 9:12
  Speaker 4: I have a lot of friends, My closest friends, probably
• 9:16
  Speaker 4: besides my childhood friends, remain the guys that I was
• 9:19
  Speaker 4: in the Marine Corps with, and I think all of
• 9:21
  Speaker 4: us feel like we didn't do enough, whatever our part was.
• 9:25
  Speaker 4: And plenty of guys that did and saw and experienced
• 9:28
  Speaker 4: a lot more, you know, combat than I did, And
• 9:33
  Speaker 4: you know, I don't feel like I did enough, and
• 9:34
  Speaker 4: certainly they don't either, which.
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: Gives me a little bit of solace. But yeah, it
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: was it was busy time.
• 9:40
  Speaker 2: How much of your experience there in Iraq in Afghanistan
• 9:49
  Speaker 2: stays with you today?
• 9:53
  Speaker 4: Well, I actually didn't carry any of it with me
• 9:59
  Speaker 4: in the year early aftermath. You know, I sort of
• 10:02
  Speaker 4: like buried all of it, my childhood experiences that were traumatic,
• 10:08
  Speaker 4: anything military related combat, and it really didn't catch up
• 10:13
  Speaker 4: to me until somewhere around two thousand and nine, and
• 10:18
  Speaker 4: then it just became increasingly heavy and burdensome. But what
• 10:22
  Speaker 4: I carry with me today is predominantly healed version of
• 10:27
  Speaker 4: those things, stories that I told myself about, experiences and
• 10:33
  Speaker 4: just whatever. I've been able to get a little bit
• 10:36
  Speaker 4: closer to those things that I was running from, and
• 10:39
  Speaker 4: that disarms them.
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: So the things I carry now.
• 10:45
  Speaker 4: Some sadness for marines that I knew that I cared
• 10:48
  Speaker 4: about that we lost.
• 10:50
  Speaker 1: You know, some.
• 10:53
  Speaker 4: Armchair quarterbacking of how things were prosecuted for twenty years
• 10:57
  Speaker 4: and then and then left.
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: But overall, I wouldn't trade it.
• 11:03
  Speaker 4: The relationships I made were, like I said, some of
• 11:06
  Speaker 4: the strongest I've ever had in my life, including family.
• 11:11
  Speaker 2: And here you are taking these experiences, taking these stories
• 11:18
  Speaker 2: and bringing them to the forefront of so many people
• 11:26
  Speaker 2: in our world that need to hear your stories. They
• 11:30
  Speaker 2: need to hear your experiences, and man, what better of
• 11:37
  Speaker 2: an organization to be connected with than Sweethearts and Heroes
• 11:43
  Speaker 2: And you now are having Chad such a huge impact
• 11:48
  Speaker 2: on Linemen through Sweethearts and Heroes, bringing your stories, your
• 11:57
  Speaker 2: experience and a system that you and Tom and Rick
• 12:03
  Speaker 2: have created and sharpened called the Fifth Wire system, and
• 12:11
  Speaker 2: you're bringing this messaging to the hearts, the minds, the
• 12:18
  Speaker 2: ears of so many union members. Twelve forty nine in Syracuse,
• 12:23
  Speaker 2: thirteen nineteen in Pennsylvania, down in Connecticut, Local forty two.
• 12:29
  Speaker 2: What is this, this fifth Wire system? And how does
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: your military experience come into the messaging of it?
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think.
• 12:45
  Speaker 4: To boil it down in the way that I understand
• 12:48
  Speaker 4: it the best is a system to create a peer
• 12:53
  Speaker 4: network that insulates these men and women from destructive decision making.
• 12:59
  Speaker 4: And you know, my experience in the Marine Corps my
• 13:04
  Speaker 4: whole life, really, but the Marine Corps was obviously the
• 13:06
  Speaker 4: biggest sort of I don't know, most profound couple decades
• 13:13
  Speaker 4: of my life or near a couple decades. It's just
• 13:17
  Speaker 4: taking the lessons that I learned from you know, I
• 13:21
  Speaker 4: used to talk to my friends and we hung out
• 13:23
  Speaker 4: and we partied and we vented off steam or whatever.
• 13:27
  Speaker 4: But there was never a designated time and place for
• 13:32
  Speaker 4: the deeper conversation.
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: And sometimes we did.
• 13:35
  Speaker 4: Have them, I'm not saying we didn't, but it it
• 13:39
  Speaker 4: wasn't a system. There wasn't a system established for that.
• 13:43
  Speaker 4: And so from a preventive standpoint, I can't really say
• 13:48
  Speaker 4: we had a good one. I mean, maybe things have changed.
• 13:52
  Speaker 4: Maybe maybe maybe there was one and I just didn't
• 13:54
  Speaker 4: take advantage of it. But in general, I think we
• 13:57
  Speaker 4: talk a lot about resilience, but in some cases that
• 14:03
  Speaker 4: that only happens after you feel like you've been broken.
• 14:06
  Speaker 4: And this whole system is designed to prevent that, to
• 14:11
  Speaker 4: keep people upright and moving forward despite some of the
• 14:16
  Speaker 4: challenges that we face in life, to have that peer
• 14:19
  Speaker 4: network and keep them insulated from destructive decisions.
• 14:22
  Speaker 2: Now, when you step foot into any of these unions,
• 14:28
  Speaker 2: when you step foot into a room, no matter how
• 14:30
  Speaker 2: big or small it is. We've got a an officer
• 14:35
  Speaker 2: in the Marines, but we also have a bunch of
• 14:39
  Speaker 2: guys in their twenties who are like, well, hang on
• 14:41
  Speaker 2: a second, he's he's not alignment, so I'm not sure. Like,
• 14:47
  Speaker 2: first off, he's a marine, So you know, how do
• 14:53
  Speaker 2: you how do you how do you bring yourself together?
• 14:58
  Speaker 2: How do you how do you smash that down and
• 15:01
  Speaker 2: bring in relatability?
• 15:04
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I think maybe what you're getting at is that
• 15:07
  Speaker 4: little bit of skepticism that they might feel with somebody
• 15:10
  Speaker 4: from the outside coming in and especially considering what we're
• 15:15
  Speaker 4: trying to do when it's new, can feel, you know,
• 15:19
  Speaker 4: a little bit, a little bit uncomfortable for folks that
• 15:23
  Speaker 4: aren't used to talking about feelings and talking about things
• 15:26
  Speaker 4: that they may not be super comfortable with yet. But
• 15:30
  Speaker 4: these guys, like they just remind me of Marine so much.
• 15:35
  Speaker 4: It's something about the culture and the values and you know,
• 15:39
  Speaker 4: hard work, loyalty, discipline, getting the job done no matter
• 15:45
  Speaker 4: what the circumstance is, no matter what the weather is.
• 15:48
  Speaker 4: You know, all of that is just a it's their
• 15:51
  Speaker 4: interesting circumstances. But at the end of the day, these
• 15:53
  Speaker 4: guys are going to be out there and they're going
• 15:55
  Speaker 4: to get the power working or you know, they're gonna
• 15:59
  Speaker 4: fix the problem, are going to build something new.
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: They're gonna do it.
• 16:02
  Speaker 4: So when I come in, I try to be myself
• 16:06
  Speaker 4: for the most part and recognize that I hope they
• 16:11
  Speaker 4: see some confidence, not arrogance, a guy with experience that
• 16:17
  Speaker 4: has been on you know, most of the triumphs and failures,
• 16:21
  Speaker 4: and just bring my experience and the things I've done
• 16:25
  Speaker 4: and seen to a place that I can hopefully share
• 16:28
  Speaker 4: it in a way that you know, gives them a
• 16:33
  Speaker 4: less expensive experience, a less expensive way to learn.
• 16:38
  Speaker 2: And I think, like you say, there's relatability here in
• 16:43
  Speaker 2: that these guys are are are tough dudes, men and
• 16:48
  Speaker 2: men and women who absolutely are Like when it's hitting there,
• 16:55
  Speaker 2: they're not able to wade out the storm. They're they're
• 16:59
  Speaker 2: out there in the dark, in the ice, in the wind,
• 17:03
  Speaker 2: with stupid hours. Their bodies are being pushed, their minds
• 17:10
  Speaker 2: are being pushed, they're being taxed really hard. And yet
• 17:16
  Speaker 2: there's massive expectations of them and they've got to turn
• 17:21
  Speaker 2: it around. And there's also some maybe some some pressure
• 17:26
  Speaker 2: coming from home, and they've they've got to they've got
• 17:30
  Speaker 2: to carry a lot of weight around. Man.
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah, totally. I think one of the things from home too.
• 17:37
  Speaker 4: I'm this is a little bit of speculation, but it's
• 17:40
  Speaker 4: also from listening to them and talking to them for
• 17:43
  Speaker 4: the last several months and includes some of my own experience.
• 17:47
  Speaker 4: There's a real pole at your your heart and your
• 17:52
  Speaker 4: soul when you're committed to this profession that demands so
• 17:56
  Speaker 4: much of you. But part of that is sacrificing the
• 17:59
  Speaker 4: people that are closest to you, that you love the most,
• 18:01
  Speaker 4: your family, and you know in relating their industry to
• 18:07
  Speaker 4: to the Marine Corps or even you know, some other
• 18:10
  Speaker 4: branch or the military. It's just it feels like they're
• 18:14
  Speaker 4: being asked in a lot of cases too, to make
• 18:17
  Speaker 4: a sacrifice. And I don't know, it's hard. It's hard
• 18:21
  Speaker 4: for people on the outside that maybe don't have a
• 18:24
  Speaker 4: that aren't in an industry like that to understand that.
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a tough it's a tough spot to be in.
• 18:30
  Speaker 4: And sometimes it's by choice, sometimes it's by responsibility or duty.
• 18:34
  Speaker 4: But you're not always in the places and with the
• 18:37
  Speaker 4: people that you ought to be, and you're not always
• 18:43
  Speaker 4: you're not always regretful for that. You feel you feel
• 18:45
  Speaker 4: that duty and responsibility and that that's fulfilling too.
• 18:48
  Speaker 1: But it's just a it's a hard dichotomy.
• 18:51
  Speaker 2: I think you said that you're creating a peer network
• 18:57
  Speaker 2: that is having impact on these individuals in these these
• 19:04
  Speaker 2: unions and helping them make good decisions. What are what
• 19:13
  Speaker 2: are some of those decisions?
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: Well, I think.
• 19:20
  Speaker 4: When I think about destructive decisions, when I think about
• 19:22
  Speaker 4: periods in my own life where you know, I was
• 19:25
  Speaker 4: running really fast and and pretty ragged, it's you know,
• 19:30
  Speaker 4: probably drinking, it's probably, you know, spending more money than
• 19:36
  Speaker 4: you have. It's maybe just being on the run a
• 19:41
  Speaker 4: little bit in a sense, whether that's a physical run
• 19:44
  Speaker 4: or an emotional run. You're you're kind of tuned out
• 19:48
  Speaker 4: to some of the realities and more tuned into just
• 19:52
  Speaker 4: what you've got to do for your job and how
• 19:55
  Speaker 4: you and your your buddies deal with that. Respond it's
• 20:00
  Speaker 4: ability and those the heavy weight of what you're doing.
• 20:03
  Speaker 4: So I don't know, it could be gambling, It could
• 20:07
  Speaker 4: really be anything that's an escape from the reality that's
• 20:12
  Speaker 4: hard to acknowledge and sit with sometimes. So I think
• 20:16
  Speaker 4: it's different for everybody, but it's you know, maybe decisions
• 20:20
  Speaker 4: that aren't aligned with.
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: With your deeper set of values.
• 20:24
  Speaker 4: You can kind of get turned off from that and yeah,
• 20:28
  Speaker 4: and just lose your way a little bit.
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: And I think that's that's the risk when.
• 20:31
  Speaker 4: You're you're running fast and hard and you're with a
• 20:35
  Speaker 4: group of guys that share the same values of hard
• 20:38
  Speaker 4: work and discipline and getting the job done.
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: But you know, at what point is it call it
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: a day? You know?
• 20:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, are you are you feeling reciprocated with the eyes
• 20:52
  Speaker 2: of these alignement looking back at you? Do you feel
• 20:57
  Speaker 2: that there's some connectivity relatability where they're like, all right, yeah,
• 21:02
  Speaker 2: he's he's not alignment, but man, oh man, are we
• 21:06
  Speaker 2: on the same page here?
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: I hope so. And I do think that that's true.
• 21:10
  Speaker 4: Yeah, absolutely, I think there there is definitely a reciprocal respect, understanding,
• 21:18
  Speaker 4: acknowledgment of each other, even though I'm not alignment.
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah, for sure.
• 21:25
  Speaker 2: You know, Tom, Tom was telling me that some of
• 21:28
  Speaker 2: these apprentices saw Tom and Rick a long time ago,
• 21:35
  Speaker 2: and you know, middle schoolers and when the Sweethearts and
• 21:42
  Speaker 2: Heroes team has been in their school and now here
• 21:44
  Speaker 2: they are alignment. That's pretty cool, man, It is cool.
• 21:49
  Speaker 4: I've actually been there at least on two occasions where
• 21:53
  Speaker 4: one of the apprentices has come up to Tom and said,
• 21:56
  Speaker 4: I recognize you from you know whatever high school, and
• 21:59
  Speaker 4: it's pretty well.
• 22:00
  Speaker 2: Wow, what do you think about being connected to Rick?
• 22:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah? Wow, that's a really great question. JD. So.
• 22:11
  Speaker 4: I met Rick at a Tunnels to Towers event in
• 22:15
  Speaker 4: twenty nineteen. I believe I was standing in the lobby
• 22:19
  Speaker 4: of a hotel in New York City. I was down
• 22:21
  Speaker 4: there with an organization called Team Semper five, which is,
• 22:26
  Speaker 4: you know, basically a group of individuals that have been
• 22:30
  Speaker 4: wounded or injured or retired from the Marines or actually
• 22:34
  Speaker 4: it's all branches now, but and we do like events,
• 22:38
  Speaker 4: sporting events and such. So we were down there for
• 22:40
  Speaker 4: the tunnels to towers five K and I looked over
• 22:43
  Speaker 4: my shoulder and I saw Rick, and I had seen
• 22:46
  Speaker 4: pictures of him, and I'd seen little bits about his
• 22:49
  Speaker 4: story on the news, and I didn't really know how
• 22:52
  Speaker 4: to I didn't want to have the it was it's
• 22:55
  Speaker 4: just a weird feeling, you know, because it's like, what
• 22:57
  Speaker 4: do you go up to the guy and say, sure,
• 23:00
  Speaker 4: I think I recognize you. It's like an honor to
• 23:03
  Speaker 4: meet you and thank you for your service kind of thing,
• 23:08
  Speaker 4: which is what I did. I felt very compelled to
• 23:11
  Speaker 4: do it, but it felt awkward, you know. And my
• 23:15
  Speaker 4: vision of Rick at that point was like, Wow, this
• 23:19
  Speaker 4: guy has given up so much of himself for this country.
• 23:23
  Speaker 4: He's you know, he's a disabled man essentially as a
• 23:27
  Speaker 4: result of his service. And then when I came on
• 23:31
  Speaker 4: with Sweethearts and Heroes, I got to spend a lot
• 23:34
  Speaker 4: more time with Rick in a pretty short time. And
• 23:38
  Speaker 4: it's like the first time I heard him say about
• 23:41
  Speaker 4: his incident that it was the best thing that ever
• 23:42
  Speaker 4: happened to him.
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: I really found it hard to believe.
• 23:46
  Speaker 4: And the more time I spent with him, the more
• 23:49
  Speaker 4: I truly believe, deep in my soul that he means
• 23:54
  Speaker 4: that and he lives his life in that way with
• 23:57
  Speaker 4: that kind of gratitude, And it's a it's a lesson
• 24:02
  Speaker 4: that I can take away because it's so easy to
• 24:05
  Speaker 4: get down on the circumstance and what happened and why
• 24:08
  Speaker 4: and how, but it's a little more difficult to take
• 24:12
  Speaker 4: the gratitude approach. And I can't really explain what kind
• 24:18
  Speaker 4: of a human Rick is based on the way he
• 24:22
  Speaker 4: shows up every day and my interactions with him.
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: It's like I feel comfortable joking. I mean, he's just
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: another he's just another.
• 24:29
  Speaker 4: Man that went through something that was really, really, really difficult.
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: But he's incredible and it's really cool to.
• 24:38
  Speaker 4: Get to know him and to joke with him and
• 24:41
  Speaker 4: to see how he leans on Tom so hard and
• 24:44
  Speaker 4: gives Tom so much crap that's.
• 24:47
  Speaker 2: And Tom gives it right back to me, and it's
• 24:49
  Speaker 2: totally you know, it's amazing. I had the same takeaway
• 24:53
  Speaker 2: man when I when I first met him first had
• 24:55
  Speaker 2: him on the area and he said, one of the
• 24:59
  Speaker 2: greatest things that's ever happened to me, he's getting blown up,
• 25:02
  Speaker 2: covered in diesel fuel fighting from my life in Iraq.
• 25:08
  Speaker 2: And it's like, all right, that's got to be like
• 25:11
  Speaker 2: maybe part of his stick, right, that's what you would
• 25:15
  Speaker 2: think at the beginning, is but yeah, but once you
• 25:18
  Speaker 2: get to know him, it's like he really embodies that. Man,
• 25:21
  Speaker 2: It's like he he really means it. And there's so
• 25:27
  Speaker 2: much to learn from from Rick and and Tom both.
• 25:32
  Speaker 2: I mean, you guys are constantly pointing the finger at
• 25:36
  Speaker 2: each other. He's the hero. No, he's the hero.
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: He's here.
• 25:39
  Speaker 2: Uh but man, it's it's it's amazing the the message
• 25:47
  Speaker 2: that you guys bring of hope, of resiliency, being being strong,
• 25:56
  Speaker 2: but being true to yourself more than anyone else, literally
• 26:01
  Speaker 2: anyone else on the planet. Be true to yourself.
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, no, I can't. I couldn't say enough good
• 26:09
  Speaker 1: about Rick.
• 26:09
  Speaker 4: And that's all independent of what he went through in Iraq.
• 26:16
  Speaker 4: He's just yeah, he's just like, he's a remarkable dude.
• 26:20
  Speaker 4: He's got a great sense of humor. It does it's
• 26:22
  Speaker 4: really cool to be around him.
• 26:24
  Speaker 2: And you know, I think he appreciates others that can
• 26:30
  Speaker 2: throw back at him and have a sense of humor
• 26:32
  Speaker 2: with him, like Tom and you both do. It speaks
• 26:36
  Speaker 2: volumes for Rick. But you know, Tom's telling me, You've
• 26:42
  Speaker 2: you've sat through like fifty to sixty circle gatherings with
• 26:50
  Speaker 2: all kinds of different people. Man, that's a lot of
• 26:54
  Speaker 2: circle time. That's a lot of listening, Chad, that you've
• 27:00
  Speaker 2: had to do.
• 27:02
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it's getting there, you know, I feel like a
• 27:04
  Speaker 4: couple hundred more and I'll really really understand how it
• 27:08
  Speaker 4: all works.
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: But no, it's been great.
• 27:12
  Speaker 4: It's yeah, I'm just I'm humbled really that that's even
• 27:17
  Speaker 4: an accolade, because it feels like a privilege, to be
• 27:20
  Speaker 4: honest with you, the circle portion of the work especially,
• 27:23
  Speaker 4: it's just like it really feels like a privilege.
• 27:26
  Speaker 1: Don't get me wrong. It's there can be some.
• 27:29
  Speaker 4: It can be heavy lifting in the sense of like
• 27:33
  Speaker 4: you know, there's a you're you're taking in a.
• 27:36
  Speaker 1: Lot and these are sometimes things that are.
• 27:39
  Speaker 4: Very sacred to people, and so there's a requirement and
• 27:43
  Speaker 4: a responsibility to treat them as such. So that part,
• 27:49
  Speaker 4: you know, it's it's delicate at times, and you don't
• 27:52
  Speaker 4: want to make a mistake. You don't want to you know, yeah,
• 27:56
  Speaker 4: you don't want to dishonor or unintentionally.
• 28:02
  Speaker 1: Disrespect something that somebody's sharing.
• 28:04
  Speaker 4: And so it's it can be heavy lifting in that way,
• 28:08
  Speaker 4: but really to just share the space and and to
• 28:11
  Speaker 4: have people opening up together, it feels like a real
• 28:14
  Speaker 4: sacred privilege to be honest.
• 28:16
  Speaker 2: Tom and Rick call you a facilitator. They call you
• 28:22
  Speaker 2: a weaver. Uh, we've we've heard these words of how
• 28:28
  Speaker 2: you're you're bringing your content into these union halls and
• 28:37
  Speaker 2: also to to to students and into faculty at schools
• 28:40
  Speaker 2: of which you've attended many What do you what do
• 28:47
  Speaker 2: you tack yourself? What's the pin that you put on there?
• 28:51
  Speaker 2: Is it a is it a weaver? Is it a facilitator?
• 28:56
  Speaker 2: What do you think?
• 28:58
  Speaker 4: Well, I think those words are definitely part of like
• 29:01
  Speaker 4: the professional job title or you know, job description.
• 29:07
  Speaker 2: Tom tomsm a tomism.
• 29:11
  Speaker 4: Yes, I you know, I'd like to think that I'm
• 29:17
  Speaker 4: a mentor of sorts as well, a friend, a big brother,
• 29:24
  Speaker 4: you know, sort of the I mean, I hate to
• 29:27
  Speaker 4: say this, it could sound like like a little too much,
• 29:32
  Speaker 4: but like a father son almost, you know, but not
• 29:35
  Speaker 4: a young son, like an adult son that you've grown
• 29:38
  Speaker 4: to develop this deeper relationship with that you know, knows
• 29:43
  Speaker 4: when he needs to hold you accountable for something you're saying.
• 29:47
  Speaker 4: But in general, you're you're leading and guiding based on
• 29:50
  Speaker 4: the the more experience and hopefully more wisdom as a
• 29:54
  Speaker 4: result of that. So those are the things that come
• 29:56
  Speaker 4: to mind for me. That mentor that father son or
• 29:58
  Speaker 4: big brother or yeah, you know friend that maybe is
• 30:02
  Speaker 4: just a couple years older that you can look up to.
• 30:06
  Speaker 4: You can see that there's imperfections, but still he's been
• 30:10
  Speaker 4: through things and experienced things that can help you.
• 30:14
  Speaker 2: What have you been through and experienced outside of of
• 30:19
  Speaker 2: Iraq and Afghanistan? Where you can you can bring your
• 30:24
  Speaker 2: heart into a conversation and connect with somebody.
• 30:29
  Speaker 4: Well, I was six years old and it was April,
• 30:34
  Speaker 4: I remember really well, and we got a spring snowstorm
• 30:38
  Speaker 4: in upstate New York. So my dad, my older brother
• 30:41
  Speaker 4: who was about five years older than me he was
• 30:43
  Speaker 4: eleven at the time, and my grandfather all took off
• 30:47
  Speaker 4: to go shovel snow off of my grandfather's hunting camp
• 30:52
  Speaker 4: and I begged to go, but I wasn't allow out.
• 30:54
  Speaker 4: I probably would have been you know, they would have
• 30:56
  Speaker 4: been trying to pick me out of the deep snow,
• 30:58
  Speaker 4: and I wouldn't have been much help. So they came
• 31:00
  Speaker 4: back that night. My brother said he had a headache,
• 31:03
  Speaker 4: and you know, when I think back to that night,
• 31:07
  Speaker 4: I think I knew something was wrong because I'd never
• 31:11
  Speaker 4: seen him lie on the couch and be sick. You know, kids,
• 31:16
  Speaker 4: I don't know, just I never saw him like that,
• 31:18
  Speaker 4: and I think in my gut instinct I knew something
• 31:21
  Speaker 4: was wrong.
• 31:21
  Speaker 1: But that headache escalated. Within a couple of days.
• 31:24
  Speaker 4: The double vision got him a trip to the hospital,
• 31:28
  Speaker 4: and I don't remember the exact timeline, but very soon
• 31:31
  Speaker 4: after he was diagnosed with a very aggressive glioblastoma brain
• 31:35
  Speaker 4: cancer at the base of his brain, like right at
• 31:41
  Speaker 4: the brain stem. So it was really difficult to operate on.
• 31:46
  Speaker 4: They tried, they couldn't do much with it. About ten
• 31:49
  Speaker 4: months of chemotherapy and radiation. It was a very I
• 31:53
  Speaker 4: remember a very short remission during that time, and I
• 31:57
  Speaker 4: remember going to show and tell at school and say,
• 31:59
  Speaker 4: my brother is getting better.
• 32:00
  Speaker 1: You know, we threw a baseball and it was like,
• 32:03
  Speaker 1: and I think everybody probably but.
• 32:06
  Speaker 4: Me, knew that that was you know, it was terminal,
• 32:11
  Speaker 4: and you know, to be honest, I don't think my
• 32:13
  Speaker 4: dad ever bought that it was terminal either.
• 32:15
  Speaker 1: But I'll get to that part.
• 32:16
  Speaker 4: So fast forward from that April to February the same year,
• 32:22
  Speaker 4: my brother passed away and I happened to be in
• 32:25
  Speaker 4: the room with my family, my mom, my.
• 32:28
  Speaker 1: Dad, and my grandmother when that happened.
• 32:29
  Speaker 4: I was supposed to go home that night with my
• 32:31
  Speaker 4: aunt June and my cousins, but I begged, and you know,
• 32:35
  Speaker 4: basically wedged myself in the hospital door and said I'm
• 32:38
  Speaker 4: not leaving.
• 32:40
  Speaker 1: So he passed.
• 32:42
  Speaker 4: But part of that story is the doctor so he
• 32:45
  Speaker 4: I was in there when when the heart monitor went
• 32:48
  Speaker 4: went you know, the long beat, and things got really hectic,
• 32:52
  Speaker 4: and I ran down the hall to tell my uncle,
• 32:54
  Speaker 4: who was in the waiting room. And I don't remember
• 32:58
  Speaker 4: this detail, but the story as it's been told to me,
• 33:01
  Speaker 4: as the doctor said to my dad, you have to
• 33:04
  Speaker 4: give him permission to stop fighting, because they resuscitated him briefly, and.
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: And my brother was just you know, fighting as hard
• 33:12
  Speaker 1: as he could.
• 33:12
  Speaker 4: And that's something we learned from my parents. You know,
• 33:17
  Speaker 4: my dad had his own near death experience in his
• 33:20
  Speaker 4: twenties and just one of the toughest men I've ever known.
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: So he my dad, as far as I know.
• 33:27
  Speaker 4: And remember the story, had went in the room and
• 33:30
  Speaker 4: gave my brother permission to let go and surrender.
• 33:34
  Speaker 1: But changed our lives, changed my life. Man.
• 33:40
  Speaker 4: It's like, you know, I think about what Rick says,
• 33:42
  Speaker 4: the best thing that ever happened to me, and that
• 33:45
  Speaker 4: would be a stretch, but certainly I know now, JD,
• 33:49
  Speaker 4: that had that not happened, I wouldn't be the man
• 33:52
  Speaker 4: that I am. I wouldn't have pursued the things I pursued.
• 33:55
  Speaker 4: I would not have succeeded in the ways I did.
• 33:59
  Speaker 4: Hopefully had an impact on people in.
• 34:01
  Speaker 1: A positive way.
• 34:02
  Speaker 4: The way I did, the way I have, the way
• 34:04
  Speaker 4: I hope to continue. So it was. It was tragic.
• 34:08
  Speaker 4: It still hurts. I miss him. His birthday just passed.
• 34:11
  Speaker 4: Sometimes I kind of ignore it and let it just pass.
• 34:15
  Speaker 4: Sometimes I acknowledge it on social media or publicly. I mean,
• 34:18
  Speaker 4: we always acknowledge it amongst our family. But yeah, so
• 34:22
  Speaker 4: that shaped me. That shaped me big time, and you know,
• 34:25
  Speaker 4: it devastated my parents. Thankfully, we had a really strong
• 34:28
  Speaker 4: community and people that came together. My aunt val especially
• 34:32
  Speaker 4: is like a second mom to me.
• 34:33
  Speaker 1: You know.
• 34:33
  Speaker 4: Yeah, but that was that was the signature moment of
• 34:37
  Speaker 4: my childhood for sure.
• 34:39
  Speaker 2: Are your parents still with us?
• 34:43
  Speaker 1: They are? Yeah, they're almost eighty.
• 34:46
  Speaker 4: And my dad has an artificial leg all the way
• 34:49
  Speaker 4: to his hip, so he has a what's called a
• 34:51
  Speaker 4: hip disarticulation, and it's pretty wild. He's really upset right
• 34:58
  Speaker 4: now because the artificial legs has a break in it
• 35:01
  Speaker 4: and he's going through the process of getting it fixed.
• 35:03
  Speaker 4: But he's got to use these crutches that I've seen
• 35:06
  Speaker 4: him use when we go deer hunting, or you know,
• 35:08
  Speaker 4: if we went to like an amusement park when I
• 35:10
  Speaker 4: was a little kid, he'd use them for a little
• 35:12
  Speaker 4: bit of additional stability and stuff. But he's having to
• 35:16
  Speaker 4: use one of these now, or use my mom's shoulder.
• 35:18
  Speaker 4: She's been a rock. My mom is super strong, and
• 35:22
  Speaker 4: but they're still alive. They still get around pretty good.
• 35:24
  Speaker 1: There.
• 35:25
  Speaker 4: Yeah, they're both pretty incredible testaments and examples to me.
• 35:29
  Speaker 2: You guys heard that's that's you're tough. All of you.
• 35:34
  Speaker 1: Listen.
• 35:35
  Speaker 2: I just have to ask you because if I don't,
• 35:39
  Speaker 2: I'm gonna wish that I did. Do you believe that
• 35:45
  Speaker 2: your your brother has witnessed what you've been through, what
• 35:50
  Speaker 2: you've done, how tough you are, and do you believe
• 35:56
  Speaker 2: that someday you'll have a chance to be with him
• 36:02
  Speaker 2: to thank him for instilling what he but you believe
• 36:10
  Speaker 2: he has into you?
• 36:13
  Speaker 1: I do? Can I just like unpack that a little bit?
• 36:17
  Speaker 2: Please?
• 36:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah?
• 36:19
  Speaker 4: So, when my brother was sick, I remember praying for
• 36:24
  Speaker 4: him to get better. I think it was about the
• 36:27
  Speaker 4: only thing I prayed for for that period of time.
• 36:31
  Speaker 1: And you know that didn't happen.
• 36:34
  Speaker 4: But I think because of my age and misunderstanding of
• 36:38
  Speaker 4: what prayer is about and how it works, I struggled.
• 36:42
  Speaker 1: With my faith.
• 36:43
  Speaker 4: You know, I went through confirmations as a teen through
• 36:47
  Speaker 4: our Lutheran church, and my parents both have a very
• 36:51
  Speaker 4: strong faith. I mean, my dad's hilarious because he'll drop
• 36:55
  Speaker 4: f bombs like it's cool, but yeah, faith is his
• 36:58
  Speaker 4: faith is like it's important to him, you know, and
• 37:02
  Speaker 4: it's I've struggled on and off over the years, you know.
• 37:07
  Speaker 4: I I so to two parts to this. I do
• 37:11
  Speaker 4: believe my brother has been with me and witnessed my journey. Honestly,
• 37:18
  Speaker 4: I believe he must be a guardian angel, because in
• 37:22
  Speaker 4: terms of recklessness as a teenager and somebody in my twenties,
• 37:28
  Speaker 4: it would be difficult to find somebody that was as
• 37:31
  Speaker 4: reckless amongst my friend group that we're all reckless, you know,
• 37:35
  Speaker 4: we not that we're comparing here. But I didn't. I
• 37:38
  Speaker 4: didn't really have a great value for life, if that
• 37:44
  Speaker 4: makes sense. And some of that was young and my
• 37:46
  Speaker 4: brain wasn't developed, but some of it was just what's it.
• 37:50
  Speaker 1: Matter kind of thing.
• 37:51
  Speaker 4: But no, I think he's I think he's witnessed me
• 37:54
  Speaker 4: some of the choices I've made, some of the more
• 37:55
  Speaker 4: difficult things I've decided to do. Honestly, we're out of
• 38:00
  Speaker 4: some kind of some kind of commitment to him, you know,
• 38:04
  Speaker 4: having watched him struggle and be so brave.
• 38:07
  Speaker 1: I can't even believe.
• 38:09
  Speaker 4: That an eleven year old could exercise that kind of courage.
• 38:16
  Speaker 4: And so that taught me a lot, and probably even
• 38:19
  Speaker 4: joining the Marines, when I went in the Marine Corps
• 38:21
  Speaker 4: five to three and one hundred and thirteen pounds.
• 38:23
  Speaker 1: I'll share a picture outside of this, but yeah, I
• 38:27
  Speaker 1: think back, I'm.
• 38:28
  Speaker 4: Not even sure how like the recruiter or my parents
• 38:31
  Speaker 4: or anybody allowed it to happen.
• 38:34
  Speaker 1: But you know, I did very well.
• 38:36
  Speaker 4: I was a spry I was a spry little guy,
• 38:39
  Speaker 4: pretty strong in terms of relative strength, and I did
• 38:41
  Speaker 4: quite well. But I think part of that choice was
• 38:45
  Speaker 4: certainly some kind of commitment solidarity. You know, I can
• 38:51
  Speaker 4: struggle too. I'm tough too, so that was part of it.
• 38:56
  Speaker 4: But so to answer your question a little more concisely, Uh, yeah,
• 39:01
  Speaker 4: I think my brother has has witnessed and been with
• 39:03
  Speaker 4: me and even been a guardian angel, and I sure
• 39:08
  Speaker 4: hope that someday we're reunited in whatever the afterlife is
• 39:13
  Speaker 4: some kind of spiritual you know, reuniting.
• 39:18
  Speaker 1: So that's that's all I can say really.
• 39:20
  Speaker 2: That do you feel that maybe you might be playing
• 39:26
  Speaker 2: a similar role for lack of a better term, too,
• 39:29
  Speaker 2: some of these linemen that you're you're interacting with, and
• 39:34
  Speaker 2: some of these people that are are living possibly some yeah,
• 39:43
  Speaker 2: some very quiet lives of despair, discouragement, depression. Maybe they
• 39:50
  Speaker 2: don't they don't really see a way out. I mean,
• 39:53
  Speaker 2: we talk about the the suicide rate with with linemen
• 39:56
  Speaker 2: in general, staggering, staggering numbers. That you might be playing
• 40:02
  Speaker 2: that role of of that guardian angel.
• 40:07
  Speaker 1: I mean, I don't know.
• 40:09
  Speaker 4: I would at least hope that what these guys feel
• 40:15
  Speaker 4: is a connection that outlasts the circle, that outlasts the conversation.
• 40:21
  Speaker 1: That you know, there's a.
• 40:26
  Speaker 4: An understanding, a deep understanding, a spiritual understanding that my
• 40:30
  Speaker 4: heart is with them, you know, in whatever there, whatever
• 40:34
  Speaker 4: their day brings, Like I, I and relationships are important
• 40:39
  Speaker 4: to me, and I you know, I care When I
• 40:43
  Speaker 4: make a connection with someone, it means something.
• 40:47
  Speaker 1: It can be a little bit difficult.
• 40:48
  Speaker 4: You know, I I because of my experiences, I can
• 40:51
  Speaker 4: try to keep it superficial or keep.
• 40:54
  Speaker 1: Some distance, but once the investment is.
• 40:56
  Speaker 4: Made, I'm in man, You're You're You're somebody I care about.
• 41:01
  Speaker 4: You're somebody I think about. You're somebody i'm gonna pray for.
• 41:04
  Speaker 4: If i'm praying, I'm gonna send as much positive energy
• 41:07
  Speaker 4: your way as I can.
• 41:08
  Speaker 1: And I'm in your corner.
• 41:09
  Speaker 4: Whether we talk on the phone once a year or
• 41:12
  Speaker 4: once a decade, like if we we made that connection,
• 41:15
  Speaker 4: I'm with you. And so whether that's some kind of
• 41:18
  Speaker 4: guardian angel type force, I don't know, but I try
• 41:22
  Speaker 4: to send that out like and I hope that the
• 41:25
  Speaker 4: people i'm you know, sharing this space where they're feeling something.
• 41:28
  Speaker 2: Man. You you you sound like Tom right there. I mean,
• 41:35
  Speaker 2: no one no wonder why the two of you guys
• 41:38
  Speaker 2: are connected. Man. And it's like, I don't know if
• 41:41
  Speaker 2: this is just like a you know, not to be weird,
• 41:44
  Speaker 2: but but like the energy from the earth or whatever
• 41:48
  Speaker 2: it might be, or maybe it's just simple coincidence. But
• 41:50
  Speaker 2: I mean, you guys grew up right near each other.
• 41:53
  Speaker 2: You you had mutual friends, uh, but yet you weren't
• 41:57
  Speaker 2: connected until what now your kids got to experienced Tom
• 42:02
  Speaker 2: and Rick, and you had the you had something that
• 42:10
  Speaker 2: that said I got to shoot this guy in email.
• 42:13
  Speaker 4: Yeah I met I met Tom for the first time
• 42:16
  Speaker 4: through a mutual friend.
• 42:18
  Speaker 1: I think it must have been just before COVID. I'm guessing.
• 42:24
  Speaker 4: Yeah, because we were it was like in a pizza
• 42:25
  Speaker 4: place and nobody was wearing masks. And it wasn't after
• 42:29
  Speaker 4: COVID because that obviously is more recent.
• 42:31
  Speaker 1: I would remember.
• 42:32
  Speaker 4: And well, look, I mean Tom, Tom's got a presence
• 42:36
  Speaker 4: and a force of his own. You know, here's a
• 42:37
  Speaker 4: guy that was a UFC fighter and he looks like
• 42:41
  Speaker 4: a you know, like a monster, you know, but then
• 42:45
  Speaker 4: he speaks and he's he's intelligent, and he's well read,
• 42:48
  Speaker 4: and he's committed to just deep diving into this social
• 42:56
  Speaker 4: you know, social penetration theory, all the science around human connection, hope, belonging,
• 43:03
  Speaker 4: you know, these things that are At the time I
• 43:05
  Speaker 4: met him, they were important to me. You know, I
• 43:08
  Speaker 4: was in the I was going through my own existential crisis,
• 43:11
  Speaker 4: and some of the things he said resonated. So yeah,
• 43:15
  Speaker 4: fast forward four or five years and my middle son
• 43:17
  Speaker 4: came home from school and started telling me about this
• 43:19
  Speaker 4: assembly with a you know, an army veteran who was
• 43:24
  Speaker 4: you know, really severely injured in Iraq and this UFC guy.
• 43:29
  Speaker 4: And I'm like, oh, I know both of those guys
• 43:31
  Speaker 4: actually barely didn't. I didn't know them, but I, like
• 43:34
  Speaker 4: I said, I'd met Rick and the tunnels to towers
• 43:36
  Speaker 4: and kind of went up as a fan almost, which
• 43:40
  Speaker 4: is humiliating, but also I you know, I just wanted
• 43:44
  Speaker 4: to pay some kind of honor to the guy.
• 43:46
  Speaker 1: But anyway, and then you know, met Tom through.
• 43:48
  Speaker 4: A friend, so I decided I was actually transitioning out
• 43:54
  Speaker 4: of the position I was currently in. I just decided
• 43:56
  Speaker 4: to send Tom a note saying, hey, my son came
• 43:59
  Speaker 4: home and just spoke about your assembly and and my
• 44:02
  Speaker 4: middle son, he doesn't talk about school. He's not going
• 44:05
  Speaker 4: to tell me about an assembly. This is this was
• 44:07
  Speaker 4: an anomaly, you know, just to give it some context.
• 44:10
  Speaker 4: And we began talking, and I began sharing a little
• 44:14
  Speaker 4: bit more about how I how I'd gotten out of
• 44:17
  Speaker 4: the Marine Corps, what I'd done since then, and in
• 44:21
  Speaker 4: kind of the journey of self exploration and self improvement
• 44:25
  Speaker 4: I'd been on and seemed like it might be a fit.
• 44:28
  Speaker 4: So showed up to a couple of circles with him
• 44:30
  Speaker 4: and we've been building it from there. And just back
• 44:33
  Speaker 4: to Tom and our connection. It's it's really interesting because
• 44:36
  Speaker 4: when we spend time together and we talk about like
• 44:39
  Speaker 4: worldviews and approaches to to work or sport or people,
• 44:46
  Speaker 4: and it just seems like we we do share a
• 44:49
  Speaker 4: lot of common views.
• 44:50
  Speaker 1: I mean, we're not the same at all. Tom's crazy.
• 44:53
  Speaker 4: Yes, I can get crazy, but Tom's always crazy in
• 44:56
  Speaker 4: a good way, you know, like in the best way.
• 44:59
  Speaker 4: He's always there, He's always operating at the highest level,
• 45:03
  Speaker 4: the highest speed.
• 45:04
  Speaker 1: There's never he.
• 45:05
  Speaker 4: Doesn't have an off switch, you know, no, And I'd
• 45:08
  Speaker 4: like to think that I have a capacity or an
• 45:11
  Speaker 4: ability to do that in like surge surge operations.
• 45:16
  Speaker 1: But not consistently.
• 45:17
  Speaker 4: I mean that guy, he's he stands out amongst like
• 45:21
  Speaker 4: the highest I mean the smallest group of people at.
• 45:24
  Speaker 1: The highest level that I've known in my life.
• 45:26
  Speaker 4: Yeah wow, yeah, yeah, for sure, Like there's just a
• 45:31
  Speaker 4: handful that operate like that, where it's it's never off,
• 45:34
  Speaker 4: it's never off.
• 45:35
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so true. What do you I mean Tom has
• 45:40
  Speaker 2: told me into tail how blessed he is by you
• 45:48
  Speaker 2: and what you've brought and continue to bring, and what
• 45:53
  Speaker 2: he hopes that you'll do. You guys got big plans
• 45:56
  Speaker 2: man beyond the Northeast. Yeah, possibly Alaska, more schools, more unions.
• 46:08
  Speaker 2: Are you crafting a your your own, your own delivery
• 46:20
  Speaker 2: of how you want to? Maybe?
• 46:24
  Speaker 1: Keno like me, Keno?
• 46:31
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, oh wow.
• 46:34
  Speaker 4: You know I it's funny. I can't ever answer just
• 46:40
  Speaker 4: a straight, straight question.
• 46:41
  Speaker 1: I guess JD. It's got to be some kind of stories.
• 46:43
  Speaker 1: All right.
• 46:43
  Speaker 2: We got a couple, That's why we do what we're doing.
• 46:47
  Speaker 1: Bro.
• 46:49
  Speaker 4: I remember one of the first times I thought about
• 46:52
  Speaker 4: speaking on some level. I was driving from Raleigh, North Carolina,
• 46:59
  Speaker 4: where I've been visiting my girlfriend on leave to Fort Sill, Oklahoma,
• 47:04
  Speaker 4: where I was about to check into a six month
• 47:06
  Speaker 4: training program to become an artillery officer.
• 47:09
  Speaker 1: It's an army school.
• 47:10
  Speaker 4: And of course I left in the evening and needed
• 47:13
  Speaker 4: to be there the next morning, so I was going
• 47:15
  Speaker 4: to drive all night.
• 47:16
  Speaker 2: Wow, And I did.
• 47:18
  Speaker 4: And I've done that many times, whether it's from California
• 47:21
  Speaker 4: to New York or you know, New York to Georgia
• 47:24
  Speaker 4: or wherever. But so I'm driving, and I guess it
• 47:28
  Speaker 4: was a strategy to keep myself awake. But I started
• 47:31
  Speaker 4: like making this speech in my head, this this talk,
• 47:36
  Speaker 4: you know, and I was just thinking about being somewhere
• 47:39
  Speaker 4: someday and sharing a story that would be relatable, albeit
• 47:46
  Speaker 4: you know, somewhat unremarkable, or maybe entirely unremarkable, but still
• 47:50
  Speaker 4: relatable and powerful and impactful.
• 47:54
  Speaker 1: So I don't know if I'm ever I don't know
• 47:58
  Speaker 1: that's happening now right.
• 47:59
  Speaker 4: Like I'm in these circles and hopefully something I share
• 48:03
  Speaker 4: is landing powerfully, but I don't know.
• 48:08
  Speaker 1: Time will tell. I've certainly I'm not opposed to it,
• 48:10
  Speaker 1: you know.
• 48:11
  Speaker 4: It's something that I've I've thought about, and that was
• 48:13
  Speaker 4: in my early twenties. One of the first times, and
• 48:15
  Speaker 4: since then, I've I've often kind of dabbled with the
• 48:18
  Speaker 4: idea of trying to write a book or get a
• 48:23
  Speaker 4: gig speaking somewhere to a group. But yeah, we'll see
• 48:28
  Speaker 4: that that's a possibility, I think, And.
• 48:32
  Speaker 2: Wow, what what's this? What have you done recently with
• 48:38
  Speaker 2: sweethearts and heroes? And maybe what's on the immediate horizon
• 48:43
  Speaker 2: here for you?
• 48:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think it's it's more circles for sure.
• 48:48
  Speaker 4: With the Union Hall Apprentices, It's really you know, I
• 48:54
  Speaker 4: gotta be honest, I'm I'm really humbled that Tom speaks
• 48:57
  Speaker 4: highly of me. I kind of not sure or what
• 49:00
  Speaker 4: I bring other than myself, and uh, yeah, I don't know.
• 49:06
  Speaker 4: I'm just I'm really humbled because when it comes to
• 49:09
  Speaker 4: the Fifth Wire program and listen, I'm on the team
• 49:12
  Speaker 4: and I see some of these things that are created
• 49:15
  Speaker 4: between Tom and Brian or Tom and Rick, Tom and Abby,
• 49:18
  Speaker 4: you know, Abby and Loud and.
• 49:20
  Speaker 1: This stuff is it's incredible.
• 49:23
  Speaker 4: It's high level, you know, great material that I feel
• 49:28
  Speaker 4: like I haven't really contributed with the development or the
• 49:32
  Speaker 4: creation of it. I but you know, I'm I'll show
• 49:36
  Speaker 4: up as myself. I'll give you as as much as
• 49:39
  Speaker 4: I can of who I am and what I think
• 49:43
  Speaker 4: my value is. But I guess your question was, what
• 49:46
  Speaker 4: what have I done recently? It's it's circles. Hopefully it's
• 49:49
  Speaker 4: a lot more circles, and hopefully that's gonna be enough
• 49:52
  Speaker 4: to keep me as a relevant and you know, lifting
• 49:58
  Speaker 4: part of the team.
• 50:00
  Speaker 2: What what is? And I probably should have let off
• 50:04
  Speaker 2: with this, and and shame on me, and Tom will
• 50:07
  Speaker 2: probably beat me up over this. But what is the
• 50:14
  Speaker 2: what's your interpretation of what that fifth wire is? Because yeah,
• 50:24
  Speaker 2: back back back in the old days, it was what
• 50:27
  Speaker 2: it was, the ground, It was the white, the black
• 50:31
  Speaker 2: and the ground. And then and then new code brought
• 50:34
  Speaker 2: in a fourth wire, whatever the hell that is. And
• 50:39
  Speaker 2: you can tell I'm not an electrician, but what what
• 50:43
  Speaker 2: what is that fifth wire?
• 50:48
  Speaker 1: You know? I think ultimately it's to me. What what
• 50:52
  Speaker 1: I think about is.
• 50:56
  Speaker 4: It's taking suicide out of the equation as an option.
• 50:59
  Speaker 1: Ah and that are struggling. You know, that's the ultimate
• 51:03
  Speaker 1: For me.
• 51:03
  Speaker 4: I've lost more friends to suicide than I lost during
• 51:07
  Speaker 4: twenty years of combat.
• 51:11
  Speaker 1: I you know, make Yeah, it's.
• 51:16
  Speaker 4: That's the ultimate, you know, And and there's other like
• 51:18
  Speaker 4: I said, destructive decisions.
• 51:20
  Speaker 1: That are.
• 51:23
  Speaker 4: Destructive, but that's the ultimate and I really believe that
• 51:26
  Speaker 4: what we're doing can change, that can change, move the
• 51:30
  Speaker 4: needle on how many of these young people are taking
• 51:33
  Speaker 4: their own lives.
• 51:35
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you guys, sir, just do an incredible work.
• 51:42
  Speaker 1: Man.
• 51:42
  Speaker 2: I mean, that's a and I'm embarrassed because that's that's
• 51:47
  Speaker 2: not the word that I want to use. There's you know,
• 51:53
  Speaker 2: but what you're doing really is so remarkable and it's
• 51:57
  Speaker 2: a tall order. Man. It's it's like, you know, all
• 52:00
  Speaker 2: of you and y'all know this that what you're doing
• 52:06
  Speaker 2: is you're climbing mountains constantly and this is huge stuff
• 52:11
  Speaker 2: that you're dealing with, not just in some of these
• 52:15
  Speaker 2: union halls, but also in schools. Man. I mean, I
• 52:19
  Speaker 2: you know, I say to Tom all the time, I
• 52:21
  Speaker 2: can't imagine being in middle school right now.
• 52:25
  Speaker 1: Yeah. No, likewise with there, yeah, god.
• 52:29
  Speaker 2: With I mean your kids. How old are your kids?
• 52:32
  Speaker 1: So?
• 52:32
  Speaker 4: My daughter's nineteen, my middle son is sixteen, he's a
• 52:36
  Speaker 4: junior in high school. And my youngest it will be
• 52:38
  Speaker 4: twelve next month, he's in sixth grade.
• 52:41
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and you know, I got an eleven year old
• 52:43
  Speaker 2: little girl and it's like, man, but what she's navigating through,
• 52:50
  Speaker 2: not even in the I don't know how old you are.
• 52:52
  Speaker 2: I'm fifty five, but I mean nowhere in the ballpark
• 52:56
  Speaker 2: of what I had to navigate through, not even remotely close.
• 53:01
  Speaker 4: Yeah, no, I know.
• 53:04
  Speaker 2: For cell phones.
• 53:06
  Speaker 4: Yeah, god, man, I know, I know, you know. And
• 53:10
  Speaker 4: thankfully there weren't. If we had documented any of the stuff.
• 53:13
  Speaker 1: We were doing, it would have been right. Yeah, it's
• 53:16
  Speaker 1: not good, but yeah, I agree with JD.
• 53:18
  Speaker 4: These kids are they've got it tough, and it's way
• 53:22
  Speaker 4: different than when we were young and things were much
• 53:24
  Speaker 4: more simple.
• 53:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 53:27
  Speaker 2: Listen, man, I every time Tom says to me, oh hey, look,
• 53:35
  Speaker 2: here's the deal. You got to have this this man
• 53:38
  Speaker 2: or this woman on the air, I always know that
• 53:44
  Speaker 2: it's going to be impactful. I always know, thanks, no
• 53:49
  Speaker 2: matter what it is. And I knew this a couple
• 53:52
  Speaker 2: of days ago when I started getting heads up on you.
• 53:57
  Speaker 2: And you've just brought huge takeaways for myself personally, for
• 54:06
  Speaker 2: my followers and listeners. Incredible messaging here and I only
• 54:13
  Speaker 2: hope that I can meet you someday. There's so many
• 54:18
  Speaker 2: sweethearts and heroes, peeps, family that I haven't yet met
• 54:24
  Speaker 2: physically face to face, and I hope you're gonna be
• 54:27
  Speaker 2: one of them, brother, I really do, man.
• 54:30
  Speaker 1: Thanks JD.
• 54:31
  Speaker 4: That's really thoughtful and kind and I appreciate you. I
• 54:35
  Speaker 4: appreciate the opportunity.
• 54:36
  Speaker 1: And yeah, I hope we get to meet in person too,
• 54:39
  Speaker 1: that'd be awesome.
• 54:40
  Speaker 2: Maybe it'll be at a huge retreat someday in Costa Rica.
• 54:48
  Speaker 2: Just saying.
• 54:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I've heard that's on the table.
• 54:52
  Speaker 2: I'm just I'm ready.
• 54:53
  Speaker 1: I'm ready.
• 54:55
  Speaker 4: I got a pair of shorts and a tak top
• 54:57
  Speaker 4: ready to.
• 54:58
  Speaker 1: Go for that.
• 55:00
  Speaker 2: Thank you so much, Chad, God bless you man every
• 55:05
  Speaker 2: minute of your life. What you've done and what you're
• 55:09
  Speaker 2: doing and what you're going to do tomorrow with Sweethearts
• 55:13
  Speaker 2: and Heroes and far beyond. You sound like an outstanding husband, father,
• 55:23
  Speaker 2: and you're a remarkable man and on behalf of Tom
• 55:28
  Speaker 2: and Rick and the rest of the whole team at
• 55:32
  Speaker 2: Sweethearts and Heroes. I just know how much they love
• 55:36
  Speaker 2: and appreciate you, man so much.
• 55:39
  Speaker 1: Thanks so much for that.
• 55:40
  Speaker 4: I'm, like I said, humbled and so grateful for their
• 55:45
  Speaker 4: acceptance and to be part of a team that's just
• 55:48
  Speaker 4: doing really remarkable, powerful things in the world. So yeah,
• 55:53
  Speaker 4: thanks JD, and thanks to Sweethearts and Heroes.
• 55:55
  Speaker 2: I appreciate it, all right, buddy, man, it's this. These
• 56:00
  Speaker 2: are the kinds of podcast episodes that I don't know,
• 56:06
  Speaker 2: I don't know. They just they stick with me so much,
• 56:11
  Speaker 2: they resonate with me so much, and I hope that
• 56:16
  Speaker 2: they've done the same for you every single Wednesday. Man,
• 56:23
  Speaker 2: it's just something else. I am so blessed to bring
• 56:30
  Speaker 2: Sweethearts and Heroes into the aired out podcast and I hope,
• 56:35
  Speaker 2: I hope that some of this has changed your life.
• 56:41
  Speaker 2: I really do love it, absolutely love it. Listen. If
• 56:47
  Speaker 2: this is one of those episodes that you just got
• 56:53
  Speaker 2: to share with others, don't let this one slip by.
• 56:58
  Speaker 2: Give it a like, give it a comment, give it
• 57:01
  Speaker 2: a share, and help spread the good news and the
• 57:11
  Speaker 2: good messaging that Sweethearts and Heroes is constantly doing around
• 57:16
  Speaker 2: the clock amazing stuff. Tomorrow morning, all we got a
• 57:25
  Speaker 2: lot to talk about. Yeah, we might even brush a
• 57:30
  Speaker 2: little bit up against some politics just a little bit tomorrow,
• 57:38
  Speaker 2: but there's some great stuff going on in our community.
• 57:41
  Speaker 2: Please don't forget.
• 57:44
  Speaker 1: That.
• 57:44
  Speaker 2: Being that it is Wednesday today, over at the well
• 57:47
  Speaker 2: Space building right here, and Bury at twenty three Summer
• 57:50
  Speaker 2: Street Wellness Wednesday. An opportunity for you to leave your
• 57:56
  Speaker 2: wallet at home. Everything's free. Come in, get a massage,
• 58:00
  Speaker 2: do some yogas, some meditation, some acupuncture, accupressure. They do
• 58:04
  Speaker 2: it all over there. Everything is free. Washington County Mental
• 58:07
  Speaker 2: Health who's been serving the central Fromount of community for
• 58:11
  Speaker 2: over sixty years with person centered care. This is what
• 58:16
  Speaker 2: they do every Wednesday, well, not every Wednesday, the first
• 58:21
  Speaker 2: three Wednesdays of the month. But yeah, get over four
• 58:26
  Speaker 2: point thirty this afternoon over at twenty three Summer Street. Okay, Wednesday,
• 58:34
  Speaker 2: Wing Wednesday tonight at the VFW Post seven ninety and Barry.
• 58:38
  Speaker 2: That's happening as well. Oh yeah, no, no, I'm not
• 58:41
  Speaker 2: going to forget about that, of course not enjoy the
• 58:44
  Speaker 2: rest of your day. God bless you. Thanks so much
• 58:48
  Speaker 2: to Chad Alisair for coming on with me this morning
• 58:53
  Speaker 2: from Sweethearts and Heroes Unbelievable. We'll catch again tomorrow morning
• 58:59
  Speaker 2: right here in the aired out podcast by