Latest / The Priestess Temple Podcast / Ep 13: From Fear To Freedom: Overcoming The Fear of Being Seen
Transcript
- Embodied By Jenna: Hi, Baddie. Welcome to another episode of Bad Bitch Embodiment Podcast. My name is Jenna. I'm your host and guide, helping you feel empowered and supported to break up with diet culture, fall in love with your body, and call in your dream relationship. Let's get started. Hey y'all. Today I wanted to talk about how to get over the fear of being seen. Whoo! This is gonna be a juicy one because throughout the past few months, I have been going through a crazy transformative process where I have been coming out online very publicly, sharing my truths through this podcast and my social media channel, embodied by Jenna on Instagram. there are a lot of things that I have learned about what works to help you get over the fear of being seen so you can have more authentic and fulfilling connections in all of your relationships and to help you claim your desires if you have a goal on your mind, such as starting an online business, joining a new dance team, creating art and allowing the world to see it, or just Anything that you're like, hey, I really want to do this, but there's something in my body that's holding me back. And so today I'm going to share a personal story from my life about how I had the fear of being seen and how getting over it allowed me to embody a new identity and form more intimate relationships. And how through claiming my desire and making choices every single day. I have successfully gotten over this fear, which has allowed me to follow my dreams and to talk to you right here, right now on this podcast episode. I want you to know that you can do this too. And so at the end of the episode, I am going to give you specific actionable tips and strategies on how to get over the fear of being seen that you can implement today. To start moving through the world in a way that is more in alignment with your genuine desire. Because let's face it, if you have the fear of being seen, you're hiding your truth, you're hiding from your life, and it's leaving you isolated and alone, and it's not allowing your people to find you. And I have experienced this firsthand. So, you may or may not know that I have been on a long journey within the kink space, in particular with Shibari rope bondage. I love the way that rope feels on my skin. I love the artistry of rope bondage. I love how it helps to form connections between people. It helps people develop communication skills. And also it just feels really fucking good. my first experience with rope was back in 2023. I went to a kink event in San Juan, Puerto Rico. And at that event, I had the opportunity to tie rope with some friends And it was an experience that changed my life forever. I felt the rope on my skin. I felt the connection between all of us as we were binding one another and we took photos, and that moment spread. Sparked something within me that made me desire to have more of these types of experiences. And so I went to a sex shop down in San Juan and I bought some more rope and I started experimenting with self-ties. I kept it mainly under wraps because it's not something that's socially acceptable or common, especially where I'm from in Buffalo, New York. when I moved home to Buffalo. I wanted to become more immersed in these kinky communities with other people who liked rope bondage. I joined FetLife And there was this Buffalo is burning fetish ball that is put on by a kink group called Black Dragon. I will link Black Dragon in the show notes below if you want to check out their community a little bit more. I was so curious about this fetish ball. So I decided to buy a ticket and go by myself because I wanted to see if there were other people there who were into rope and if I could make more connections within the kink community. And I remember at the end of 2024, in December, getting ready for this fetish ball, and I felt so uncomfortable. I was wearing this outfit of like body stockings and a leather skirt, and I was wondering if it was gonna be appropriate or not. And I go to the event and I'm so self conscious, and I walk in the room and I am feeling like a total outcast. I didn't know anybody there. I was feeling really uncomfortable as I was going to the vendors and they were asking me questions if I wanted to buy any like kinky play toys or collars or leather bondage straps. I'm watching these impact play demonstrations that I have never seen and these Shibari rope bondage performances that I was totally intrigued by, but didn't feel comfortable expressing my desire for wanting that type of play to the other people there. And I felt really Isolated. Like I just didn't belong in that community. I was so shy and I didn't really talk to anyone there. And after being there for a couple hours, I just left. I went home and I tied rope on my body in the privacy of my own room. And I took some pictures and I just kept it under wraps only for me. I didn't really go to another kink event again because I felt so uncomfortable during that experience. fast forward to 2026, I had decided to start my own business again. And I really wanted to be more public and more visible online. When I started to expose myself on the podcast, I made a commitment that I was going to combine this very uncomfortable act with speaking on camera with something I genuinely desired, which was to tie rope. Depending on what platform you listen to this on you may or may not know I tie rope bondage on my body for every single podcast. And so I am very visible now in my love for this fetish kink. Through being open about my desire to have rope bondage tied on my body, I went to the Buffalo is burning fetish ball this year in 2026. And this time, I had a completely different experience, y'all. I have gotten to the point where I felt comfortable enough to actually tie rope on my body as part of my outfit as I was going to this fetish ball. so I arrive at the fetish ball and I'm feeling hot and I'm feeling sexy and I'm wearing my rope. And I bump into a friend who I invited to the ball. they were there by themselves as well. we started talking about rope. We started talking about relationships and what we do for work. And we just had the most connective and intimate experience. it was really a beautiful budding of a new friendship. And then I bumped into another friend Her and I have known each other since middle school, okay? And it's been so cool for us to reconnect over our love of rope through me being more visible on my podcast. And then finally, I went downstairs to step outside for a minute. And when I was in that area, I saw this really beautiful woman who had captivated me. Her outfit was amazing. And as I was admiring her from afar, she came up to me and was like, hey, girl. And I realized that she was one of the performers at a cabaret night event that I had gone to the previous week. And we hit it off. We started talking about my podcast and dance. We went inside. We watched the burlesque performers together. And we even ended up getting some really fun, kinky. pictures taken at the boudoir station. And as I walked out with her at the end of the event, we gave each other a hug and parted ways. And I went home and as I was sitting at my kitchen table eating snacks, I was like, holy shit, I am that bitch. I am that bitch that I desired to be so long ago. Back when I felt awkward and weird and like a Fucking loser when I was alone, knowing nobody at the Fadish Ball in 2024. I'm telling you, this year in 2026, just a year and a half later, I had a completely different experience at the same event with the same people in the same location. And the only thing that had changed was me, y'all. It was me. It was me expanding my nervous system capacity to get over the fear of being seen by making daily choices and moving through the world to embody a new identity. And it has allowed my people to find me for the first time in my life. I felt so much intimacy and connection at that event. And when I felt that I came to the realization of holy shit, I know how to help other people get over the fear of being seen. And so here it is. Here is the roadmap, y'all. First step to get over the fear of being seen, you have to lean into your fear. I'm sorry, it may seem fucking obvious, but I'm telling you, you are going to have to be triggered. Okay. If you have a desire on your heart. It means that God wants it for you, but that's what it is. It is a desire. It means that you do not currently have it. And so, in order for your identity to align with the new desire, you need to make a choice that is in alignment with that desire. So for me, It was the decision to tie rope and be very public in my kink when I film each podcast. for you, it could be something totally different. You want to think about the end goal of where you're trying to go, fulfilling your ultimate desire. Maybe this could be that you want to run a marathon, right? And so, in order for you to run that marathon, You don't have to just get up and run 10 miles tomorrow. No, it's gonna be too fucking much. And you are going to blow your capacity within your body and within your nervous system. So what you need to do instead is you need to start making little small choices, little baby steps every single day. And so tomorrow, maybe that could be You pick a date and you sign up for the marathon. And then the next day you think about your training plan and you write down and commit to how much and how often you're going to run. And then I'm sorry, you have to do it. You have to start the uncomfortable process of running and training and increasing the distance that you run every single day until eventually a few months down the line, you are that bitch who is crossing the finish line at that marathon. Do you see what I'm saying? It all starts with these little baby steps and these little baby choices that you make every single day that help you to align your current identity with the aspirational identity of your future desire. The thing about it here is that you have to be uncomfortable. You do just like when you're training for that marathon and you're slowly increasing the distance that you're running every single day. For me, it was really stretchy to increase my nervous system capacity by allowing myself to be seen allowing people to perceive me and to receive their judgment and be okay with whatever they perceived. I want you to realize that this was a very scary process for me. But through exposing myself on a regular basis and leaning into the fear, the fear over time slowly started to dissipate. And that's what happens when you make these little choices every day. At first they seem really big and really scary, but when you are consistent with committing to that choice over time, The fear diminishes and it just becomes the person that you naturally are. Another tip to get over the fear of being seen is that you have to be able to be witnessed in your imperfections. Okay, this was a big one for me. If you have ever struggled with perfectionism or procrastination, well then listen up because this message is divinely channeled for you. Perfectionism and procrastination are the ultimate products of the patriarchy. Yes, because the patriarchy works to control and manipulate women by making them feel shame for existing. And when we think about perfectionism and procrastination, both of these ideologies are rooted in unworthiness and shame, the fear of not being good enough. You have to realize, babe, that in order for you to be really good at something, you have to be really bad at it first. For example, my rope work, okay? Rope is really intricate, and there's a lot of technical skill that is involved with tying rope. And so when I first started tying rope, it was really fucking hard. And my knots were not laying flat and the rope was getting all tangled, and I was getting really fucking frustrated. And it was stretchy for me to allow my imperfect rope to be seen on camera. However, since doing these podcasts, we're now on episode 13. The quality of my rope work has gotten so much better. And even to the point where I was at the fetish fall tied in rope, and other people were coming up to me and asking me about rope and asking me how to get into rope and how to embody that desire that has been on their mind that they have not yet implemented as a practice in their life. And I think when we can be seen in our imperfection, we shine a light that helps guide others to see that they can embody their desire too. And so nobody's perfect here. And when you can allow yourself to be seen in your imperfection, you start to move closer to the desire that's on your heart while also being proof for other people that they can have that desire as well. And even just today, my teacher from the Buffalo rope dojo Lex, who I will also tag in the show notes below if you want to learn more about rope bondage, he followed me on Instagram and I am allowing Lex to see me tied in my imperfect rope here on my podcast. And a past version of me would have been so self-conscious to allow him to view me in my imperfection of rope. But now I am so happy that he is here and that he is willing to listen to my message. And we are connecting more deeply through me being willing to be seen in my imperfection. The last one, procrastination. Woo! Procrastination is the devil because when you are procrastinating, you are allowing fear to consume you and hold you back from embodying the identity that you desire When we make a choice and when we move through space, we collapse timelines. Okay. When I think about the posts that I wanted to make online, there were times in my past where I would re-record the video five different times, where I would set a draft in my phone and think about pressing send and then stop and then wait and then never post the video again. I was allowing my fear to hold me back. It was my nervous system subconsciously protecting me from the judgment of being witnessed in this new identity. But I'm telling you, when you procrastinate, what you're doing is you're letting fear and shame win. You're subconsciously signaling to the universe that you are not good enough to have what the fuck you want. And when you actually make a choice and you move, that is when your identity shifts. And so you have to stop procrastinating. You don't need to know more information. You don't need to ask a friend for advice. You simply need to make a choice and you need to move through the fucking world right here, right now. Just like the example of training for the marathon, right? If you are thinking about training for the marathon, but you're not actually running and moving through the world, well, then goddamn, you are gonna be in a world of hurt when it is time for you to start running that race. Okay. You can't put it off. You have to make these little choices every single day to align your identity with who you desire to be. And so when we're thinking about getting over the fear of being seen, the top three tips that I can give to you is A, lean into fear, B get over the Get over the mindset of needing to be perfect and see, stop waiting, make a choice and move. I can tell you that my experience between the first time I went to that fetish ball back at the end of 2024 and now being the main character at the fetish ball in 2026 was because I implemented those three concepts into my life. It is not fucking easy, but it is simple. When you truly have a desire on your heart, it means that it is meant for you and that you are destined to embody that identity, but you need to face your fears. You need to make yourself uncomfortable. You need to realize that nobody is. Perfect. And when you allow yourself to be witnessed in that imperfection, that is when people can truly see you and truly find you. So what are you waiting for? Get out of your head and into your body. Stop thinking about making the change and just be the motherfucking change. Think about what you want, make a choice, commit and move. And I guarantee you that the right people will. find you in record time, leading to more intimate and fulfilling relationships as you embody your truth on the path to fulfilling your ultimate desire and destiny. Thank you for tuning in to another episode of Bad Bitch Embodiment Podcast. If you enjoyed our conversation, please share with members of your community and be sure to like, comment, and subscribe so we can keep having these amazing conversations every week. I will see you next Thursday. And until then, you are a bad bitch. Don't you ever forget it.