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Grandma Baby Shower, Baby Edition Hot Takes, Ask Us Anything, VIP Table · Absolutely KNOT Another Podcast

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_02: All right, welcome to another episode of Absolutely Not, another podcast presented by Forever and More event planning.
• 0:06
  SPEAKER_02: Use code BrideTen at checkout to save 10% off your top-tier planning package.
• 0:12
  SPEAKER_02: And be sure, if you have not done so already, to come to our live game show.
• 0:19
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, get your tickets for the big wedding game show, November 10th, 6 to 8:30 at Matrimony Pittsburgh, downtown.
• 0:25
  SPEAKER_00: It's a very cool spot.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_00: It's going to be really, really fun.
• 0:28
  SPEAKER_00: I am excited.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_00: We've been working on it.
• 0:31
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 0:31
  SPEAKER_02: I think the flow of the event's going to be fun.
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_02: Audience, you'll get an opportunity to participate in the games.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_02: If you're not someone that wants to participate, you can always pass the game along to somebody else.
• 0:42
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_00: But it'll be a fun time.
• 0:44
  SPEAKER_00: Anybody that walks through that door could be called up on stage.
• 0:47
  SPEAKER_00: I did get a couple of questions, which was somebody messaged me and was like, should I come to this with my maid of honor and my bridesmaids?
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_00: Or is this something more that I should come with my partner?
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_00: And I responded and I was like, you could totally come with whoever because it doesn't matter if you're planning a wedding or not.
• 1:03
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 1:03
  SPEAKER_00: Like it's mainly for fun.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_00: It's I think if you are engaged, it's a fun experience to like sprinkle into your planning journey as like you can get some ideas because there's going to be cool vendors and like good food.
• 1:15
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_00: But then I also had somebody ask if we were going to be giving out cash prizes.
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_00: I was like, we haven't actually figured out the exact prizes, but we know there's going to be two grand prizes.
• 1:31
  SPEAKER_00: And then there's going to be a bunch of prizes for like the segment.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, I don't know.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_00: Well, segment shows for each game will have one, and then there's two larger winners for the end of the show.
• 1:42
  SPEAKER_02: So if you play in any of the games and you win the game, you get a prize and you advance to the grand finale game that happens at the end.
• 1:49
  SPEAKER_02: So all the winners participate in the final challenge, and there will be two winners from that group of people to win the grand prize.
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_00: And some of the challenges are physical, but not like jumping jack physically.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, nothing that's gonna like no one won't be able to do it.
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_00: Correct.
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_02: Like anybody could really participate.
• 2:09
  SPEAKER_02: It does the ticket beyond attending the game show, it does come with two drink tickets.
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_02: You can purchase more drink tickets there if you want to have more than two.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_02: So you will be able to get three with the VIP drink tickets.
• 2:26
  SPEAKER_02: There'll be food available throughout and a cookie table to indulge in as well, beyond the vendors that will be there too.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_00: So not a meal, but substantial food still.
• 2:37
  SPEAKER_00: There's still gonna be a lot of food to eat.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_02: So again, November 10th, the link is in the description of the podcast.
• 2:43
  SPEAKER_02: Whether you're listening to it on Spotify, Apple, you're watching us on YouTube, or if you go on either of either of our Instagrams, TikToks, the link to purchase the tickets is on there as well.
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_02: So hope to see you there.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_00: All right, we're gonna get into the story read today, which our story is not wedding based at all.
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_00: It's more parenting, baby shower, that sort of thing.
• 3:04
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm gonna dive right in.
• 3:06
  SPEAKER_00: Let's talk about how my mother-in-law turned my baby shower weekend into a grandma shower for herself.
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_00: Now, I have to preface to all who listen to this story that my husband and I are in a great place in our life and we are very blessed.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_00: Although we wanted to have a baby shower to shower the baby with love, we did not have a baby registry because we had purchased all of the items ourselves.
• 3:28
  SPEAKER_00: We didn't want a bunch of things to open in front of guests, and we, or we didn't want to play any games.
• 3:34
  SPEAKER_00: You probably have never been to a lot of baby showers, but usually No, the only one was our own.
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, usually you buy a gift, you play games.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_00: That's what happened.
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_00: So that these people are hosting not that.
• 3:44
  SPEAKER_00: I am extremely type A, and so my baby shower was more of a celebration of the new life that would be joining our family.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_00: So we had really good food and a chance for us all to see each other before the baby comes.
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_00: I know life is so busy, so that was important to me.
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_00: We did not ask anyone to host the shower for us.
• 4:01
  SPEAKER_00: We hosted it at our house and we paid for it on our own.
• 4:05
  SPEAKER_00: We hired our own caterer, we hired our own decorator, and we built our own guest list.
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_00: The shower was planned for a Sunday afternoon.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_00: This part is important for the rest of the story.
• 4:15
  SPEAKER_00: Now, my mother-in-law means well, but she can be very overbearing and involved even when she is not invited into the planning.
• 4:23
  SPEAKER_00: We saw this with our wedding and wedding shower, which turned into a COVID elopement, thank God.
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_00: So we knew the baby shower had the put had that same potential, so we tried to keep her out of the planning process.
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_00: But of course, we were still having her present and getting her opinions on small things so that she felt involved and a part of the process.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_00: My mother had passed away when I was just a teenager, so I've always been extremely independent, but my aunts were a big part of my life and they helped raise me.
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_00: My aunts had all made a plan to come down early for the weekend for the baby shower, so they were coming into town.
• 4:57
  SPEAKER_00: And the day before, on that Saturday, I figured it would be nice to have all of my aunts and my mother-in-law over for lunch just to visit to just to visit with each other and catch up.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_00: I eventually brought this up to my mother-in-law, and she acted really weird.
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_00: She mentioned she was not available during the afternoon on Saturday.
• 5:15
  SPEAKER_00: And so then I asked her if potentially she might want to do something in the morning instead.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_00: And she said, sorry, she was busy then as well.
• 5:21
  SPEAKER_00: I left it at that and kept moving forward with the lunch event with all my aunts.
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_00: I figured my mother-in-law just would not be able to join us.
• 5:28
  SPEAKER_00: It didn't really bother me much.
• 5:30
  SPEAKER_00: We are one week out from the baby shower, and I stopped by our mother-in-law's house to pick up some platters that she had promised would be available for us to use.
• 5:39
  SPEAKER_00: When I walked in, she seemed extremely surprised to see me, and I reminded her that I was just stopping in to pick up the platters so I could drop them off to our caterer who would be putting all the pinwheels and sandwiches on them.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_00: I was planning to drop them off to the caterer the following day so the caterer had them.
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_00: But my mother-in-law said, Oh, unfortunately, you guys can't use those anymore.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_00: I need to use them for a different party.
• 6:01
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't question what the party was, but I just asked what day she was using them and when I could come grab them next.
• 6:07
  SPEAKER_00: And she said, Oh, I'm not using these platters until Saturday, so you can't have them until Saturday night.
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_00: And I told her, unfortunately, we need them before that.
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_00: And then I decided to ask whose party it was, since she had already promised to lend them to us.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_00: And she said it was an extremely important party for an important important person, and she couldn't go back on that promise to this person.
• 6:29
  SPEAKER_00: Fast forward to later in that week, though still the week of the baby shower.
• 6:33
  SPEAKER_00: My husband and I are walking in the neighborhood, and one of our neighbors stops us and tells us she's so excited for us, and then tells my husband to tell his mom she'll be there on Saturday.
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_00: I was very confused and thought maybe she meant she'd see us all on Sunday.
• 6:49
  SPEAKER_00: And then she thought, she said she thought it was so interesting she has never heard of a grandma shower before.
• 6:56
  SPEAKER_00: I asked her again what she said, and she repeated that she had never attended a grandma shower before.
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_00: That's when it hit me.
• 7:03
  SPEAKER_00: My mother-in-law couldn't come to anything on Saturday that I had planned with my family because she was throwing herself a grandma shower.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_00: Our neighbor volunteers at the church we belong to with my mother-in-law, so it would make sense that she was invited to our shower.
• 7:21
  SPEAKER_00: But now my mother-in-law is having a grandma shower the day before.
• 7:24
  SPEAKER_00: For what?
• 7:25
  SPEAKER_00: She does not need any gifts.
• 7:27
  SPEAKER_00: She's not the one having the baby.
• 7:29
  SPEAKER_00: We finished our walk and I tried explaining to my husband what his mom was doing, and he still could not understand the concept.
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_00: I said, Your mother is hosting a party for herself because she is becoming a grandma for the first time.
• 7:42
  SPEAKER_00: He said he didn't believe it because why would she throw something like that and not invite us to the party?
• 7:48
  SPEAKER_00: I tried to explain that she probably didn't want us there.
• 7:51
  SPEAKER_00: That's why she was hosting it the day before when we had already had plans made.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_00: He took it upon himself to call his mom when we got back to the house and ask ask her if she was doing this.
• 8:01
  SPEAKER_00: And at first she tried to deny it.
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_00: And then finally she came clean and said, yes, she was hosting something for herself.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_00: She deserves to be celebrated as the grandma.
• 8:10
  SPEAKER_00: My husband told her that this is extremely unnecessary and weird, that even the neighbor made a comment to us about it.
• 8:17
  SPEAKER_00: And then his mom just went off, saying it was only fair that she got to throw a party with gifts that could be opened in front of everyone, since we had chosen to be so selfish and asked for no gifts at our baby shower.
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_00: Plus, she felt that she should be spoiled since she will be helping take care of the baby multiple times during the week.
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_00: My husband had her on speakerphone and could see my reaction.
• 8:38
  SPEAKER_00: We were both baffled.
• 8:39
  SPEAKER_00: We never asked her to watch the baby multiple times a week.
• 8:42
  SPEAKER_00: We thought she may want to help here and there, but we had hired a nanny for when I went back to work.
• 8:47
  SPEAKER_00: I was so confused.
• 8:48
  SPEAKER_00: She works part-time and volunteers at the church all the time.
• 8:51
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't anticipate her taking the baby multiple times a week, and I didn't ask her either.
• 8:57
  SPEAKER_00: We weren't going to ask her to cancel the party, but we weren't going to feed into her delusions.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_00: The grandma shower was weird and unnecessary, and she knew it.
• 9:06
  SPEAKER_00: She also knew that I was planning for a low-key gathering with no gifts, so she decided to throw herself the exact opposite.
• 9:13
  SPEAKER_00: I was shocked to see that she drew at least ten guests in attendance.
• 9:16
  SPEAKER_00: She posted photos and got all kinds of grandma clothing and gift cards.
• 9:20
  SPEAKER_00: Gift cards for what?
• 9:22
  SPEAKER_00: The whole thing is so cringy to us.
• 9:24
  SPEAKER_00: She showed up to our baby shower the next day in her grandma sweatshirt, showing us all the stuff she got, acting like it was so cool that she did that.
• 9:31
  SPEAKER_00: Again, it was weird.
• 9:33
  SPEAKER_00: Many people that went to her shower came to ours the next day and also were saying the whole party was weird and strange.
• 9:41
  SPEAKER_00: They were under the pression she was leaving her job to watch the baby.
• 9:44
  SPEAKER_00: What?
• 9:45
  SPEAKER_00: We never asked her to do that or would expect her to do that.
• 9:48
  SPEAKER_00: I'm still weirded out by it.
• 9:49
  SPEAKER_00: The icing on top is that our kids call her Mimi, so none of that grandma gear makes sense anymore.
• 9:55
  SPEAKER_00: And that was it.
• 9:56
  SPEAKER_00: That was the story about the grandma baby shower.
• 10:00
  SPEAKER_02: Like calling them selfish for not wanting any gifts.
• 10:04
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 10:04
  SPEAKER_02: I think it's like the exact opposite.
• 10:06
  SPEAKER_00: I know.
• 10:07
  SPEAKER_00: It's because like I think of it, my mom wouldn't do anything like that, but I do remember talking about having an unwrapped shower.
• 10:15
  SPEAKER_00: And I remember my mom being like, No, everybody wants to watch you open the gifts.
• 10:20
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, nobody wants that.
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I don't even want to, I don't even want to watch.
• 10:25
  SPEAKER_00: When I'm at a shower and they start opening the gifts, I'm like, oh.
• 10:28
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I might have to leave.
• 10:29
  SPEAKER_00: Gotta go early.
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I'm obviously I don't know their relationship, but it seems to me that that mom had a vision for what the baby shower should be.
• 10:40
  SPEAKER_00: And they were like, no, we're not doing that.
• 10:42
  SPEAKER_02: So she's like, well, I'll just do something for myself.
• 10:45
  SPEAKER_00: I'll just throw myself one.
• 10:46
  SPEAKER_02: Which, like, yeah, she's su she's also excited, but to not even have them come to the grandma shower.
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_02: That like they weren't there, where I'm assuming not.
• 10:57
  SPEAKER_00: No, they didn't invite them because she was trying to do it in secret for some reason.
• 11:01
  unknown: Yeah.
• 11:01
  SPEAKER_02: You gotta include the people that are gonna make you the grandma or me, me.
• 11:06
  SPEAKER_02: That does happen.
• 11:07
  SPEAKER_02: Like both of our like my mom wanted you know, is grandma for everybody.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_02: Whenever my nieces were young, she was something they called her something different because they're kid, they're babies, they don't know how to say grandma.
• 11:21
  SPEAKER_02: Even our kids call her Grammy.
• 11:23
  SPEAKER_00: I think our kids will call her Grammy.
• 11:24
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 11:25
  SPEAKER_00: At least Tyson.
• 11:27
  SPEAKER_00: Tyson's the one that calls her Grammy more than that.
• 11:29
  SPEAKER_02: Which then Benny latches on to whatever he does.
• 11:31
  SPEAKER_02: So she'll say the same.
• 11:33
  SPEAKER_00: Tyson's grandma.
• 11:34
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, it's your grandma.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_00: Is Tyson's grandma gonna be there?
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, it's your grandma too.
• 11:39
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
• 11:40
  SPEAKER_00: I've never I've never been invited to a grandma shower.
• 11:43
  SPEAKER_00: I've heard about them happening, but I do think it's I do think it's strange.
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_00: Like the baby shower is for the parents to help them get prepared and get the items that they need.
• 11:52
  SPEAKER_00: Wish them luck as they start this new journey in their life.
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_00: Is the grandma shower necessary?
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_00: No.
• 11:59
  SPEAKER_02: I got she's excited, but I don't think the excitement needs to then lend into becoming a party for her becoming a grandma and getting stuff.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_00: It's weird.
• 12:10
  SPEAKER_02: Weirdo.
• 12:11
  SPEAKER_00: I think I would decline if I got invited to my This is a very simple idea, but such a good one for weddings.
• 12:17
  SPEAKER_00: It's called Wedding Snap.
• 12:18
  SPEAKER_00: Wedding Snap gives you one QR code that you can put right on your tables and your guests can scan it and instantly upload all the photos and videos that they take throughout the night.
• 12:26
  SPEAKER_00: No app to download and no sign-up required.
• 12:29
  SPEAKER_00: We all know your photographer can't be everywhere, so this is how you get all those hilarious dance floor videos, pictures from the kids' table, random candid moments, and even voice messages from your guests that you otherwise might never see.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_00: You can even have a live slideshow during the reception.
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_00: It takes about two minutes to set up, you get full resolution downloads, and it's only$39.99 one time, no subscription.
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_00: If you want to try wedding snap for your wedding, use code WEDPROCAST10 for 10% off.
• 12:56
  SPEAKER_00: We'll have all the details linked in the show notes.
• 12:58
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 12:58
  SPEAKER_02: Next segment is tradition or trash baby edition.
• 13:03
  SPEAKER_02: I will read some popular trends that are ongoing in the parenting world, and we will give our take on if it's a nice tradition, trash it.
• 13:12
  SPEAKER_00: Got it.
• 13:12
  SPEAKER_00: I feel like I feel like we're good because we went through two kids, so we might have some good takes on that.
• 13:17
  SPEAKER_02: Some of them we did, maybe it's not so much as a tradition anymore.
• 13:21
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 13:21
  SPEAKER_02: First one is a gender reveal party.
• 13:25
  SPEAKER_00: You know, we did one for the first one for Tyson.
• 13:29
  SPEAKER_00: And going back on it now, I'm like, it really isn't like the gender reveals are unnecessary.
• 13:35
  unknown: No.
• 13:35
  SPEAKER_02: The thing is, for our gender reveal party, is we knew the gender, and everyone that attended the party did not know the gender.
• 13:43
  SPEAKER_00: We rigged a game show.
• 13:44
  SPEAKER_02: We rigged a game show to reveal the gender.
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 13:48
  SPEAKER_02: Which it was just like you we played a couple games.
• 13:50
  SPEAKER_02: It didn't really, it was like team boy versus team girl.
• 13:53
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 13:53
  SPEAKER_02: But the last challenge was just our parents coming up, and whatever color that they popped was the winner.
• 14:00
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 14:00
  SPEAKER_00: Like I don't remember exactly what we did.
• 14:02
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, that was the end.
• 14:03
  SPEAKER_02: There was there was a couple questions I think we did with our parents.
• 14:07
  SPEAKER_02: And points for this, points for that.
• 14:09
  SPEAKER_02: And then the end.
• 14:10
  SPEAKER_02: We added up to points, maybe.
• 14:12
  SPEAKER_02: We this la it was like the last question is worth one million points.
• 14:17
  SPEAKER_02: Whatever one it is, and it was the the pop of the confetti.
• 14:22
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, yes, yes, yes.
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_02: I think it there's some I think with the first child, yes, they're fine.
• 14:28
  SPEAKER_02: But if you're doing a gender reveal for every single kid, don't need to.
• 14:32
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I also feel like a gender reveal party is exciting for everybody that's involved that's attending.
• 14:39
  SPEAKER_00: But if it becomes like another gift grab type of thing, like I don't think you should ask for gifts at a gender reveal.
• 14:46
  SPEAKER_00: No, like it's more of just like a celebratory, like, yay, we're having a girl, we're having a boy.
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_00: It's it's fun.
• 14:51
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 14:52
  SPEAKER_02: I always see the pit like the videos whenever the dad or mom are upset with with the gender.
• 15:00
  SPEAKER_02: And it usually happens when it's multiple kids.
• 15:02
  SPEAKER_02: It's say you're having you have three girls and you want a boy, you want a boy, and it's a fourth girl, and someone gets upset.
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_02: Like, come on, you're gonna love them the same.
• 15:11
  SPEAKER_00: When they get all upset, especially when it's like a first baby, I'm like, don't marry.
• 15:16
  SPEAKER_00: You guys should not.
• 15:16
  SPEAKER_00: You guys should not be able to get it.
• 15:17
  SPEAKER_00: That's a red flag.
• 15:19
  SPEAKER_02: That's a red flag indeed.
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_02: All right, second one baby showers for baby number two slash sprinkles.
• 15:24
  SPEAKER_00: I did a sprinkle.
• 15:25
  SPEAKER_00: I I don't mind a sprinkle when it's a either a large gap between the kids, like say you had a baby eight years ago and then you're pregnant again, because you probably got rid of your baby stuff.
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 15:37
  SPEAKER_00: Or if it's a different gender, because you don't probably have like I did a little sprinkle for Benny, it was a small group of people, but I didn't have any girl stuff.
• 15:46
  SPEAKER_00: I had all boy stuff for Tyson.
• 15:48
  SPEAKER_00: So I I feel it like that, but if you're having back-to-back-to-back kids and they're all the same gender, I'm like, Yeah.
• 16:00
  SPEAKER_02: Not revealing the gender to anybody until the baby is born.
• 16:05
  SPEAKER_02: I think that's neat.
• 16:07
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I don't mind that.
• 16:08
  SPEAKER_02: I I internally would like to know the gender so I know what to like prepare for.
• 16:12
  SPEAKER_02: Like we just said, like you want to be able to have the right clothes, or if you're setting up the baby's room to be a certain theme, like yeah, you can just make it gender neutral.
• 16:22
  SPEAKER_02: But yeah, I I wouldn't want to do it, but I think that it's cool when people do it.
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 16:28
  SPEAKER_00: I also feel that we are both like planners in the sense that we needed to know.
• 16:33
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 16:33
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know how people go through and they like wait to have the baby to find out if they're having a girl or a boy.
• 16:39
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I feel like, especially back in the day, it was not so, hey, you could take a test at 10 weeks and like know if you're having a girl or a boy.
• 16:46
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 16:46
  SPEAKER_00: Most of the time it was 50% wrong, and then you really had to wait to find out.
• 16:50
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 16:51
  SPEAKER_00: I do, I do think that's a cool thing when you're able to either wait or you don't reveal it until the baby is born.
• 16:57
  SPEAKER_02: The other thing with it too is not having a name picked out.
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_02: Like if you wouldn't didn't know the gender.
• 17:03
  SPEAKER_02: That would stress me.
• 17:04
  SPEAKER_02: But you have names for either.
• 17:05
  SPEAKER_02: But there are people that go into the hospital to have their baby or have a birth at home.
• 17:12
  SPEAKER_02: Um, that don't even have a name picked out.
• 17:15
  SPEAKER_00: Was there neighbors like that?
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_02: And you have to like have a name before you leave the hospital.
• 17:20
  SPEAKER_00: I'm pretty sure it's like within five days of having the baby.
• 17:23
  SPEAKER_00: I think you have to have the name picked out.
• 17:25
  SPEAKER_02: I think.
• 17:26
  SPEAKER_02: I feel like once you find out you're having a baby, you start to think of names.
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_02: And then once you know the gender, you start to think of that particular name.
• 17:33
  SPEAKER_02: Like a name for your name combination.
• 17:36
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 17:36
  SPEAKER_02: What's the middle name?
• 17:38
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe that was just us.
• 17:38
  SPEAKER_00: We were always talking about it.
• 17:40
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 17:41
  SPEAKER_02: Like I always wanted to have a boy that started with a T, but I didn't know what the name was gonna be.
• 17:47
  SPEAKER_00: And even like we didn't really we went back and forth, and then I feel like Tyson came randomly.
• 17:53
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 17:54
  SPEAKER_02: Um we had like Teddy was an option, not Theodore, not Ted.
• 17:59
  SPEAKER_02: Teddy.
• 18:00
  SPEAKER_02: Teddy.
• 18:01
  SPEAKER_00: And then we also thought of Teddy for Benny, but then as two, I feel like two uh we said either of our dads, like Teddy or Ronnie.
• 18:08
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 18:08
  SPEAKER_02: But then we went with Benny, Benny, which I think is perfect for two N's, two T's, just like me with two R's, two T's.
• 18:15
  SPEAKER_02: That was that was the combo I was liking.
• 18:19
  SPEAKER_02: I don't know what this is, but a sippency.
• 18:22
  SPEAKER_02: Sippencies.
• 18:23
  SPEAKER_00: Sippencies are new, and if you don't know what they are, it's like you have your baby, you wait a couple weeks, and then you invite people to come over for like mimosas or coffee, and they can come and see the baby, like kind of in a group setting.
• 18:37
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 18:37
  SPEAKER_00: Instead of like a bunch of individual people coming over.
• 18:40
  SPEAKER_00: I love that.
• 18:41
  SPEAKER_00: I think it's cool.
• 18:42
  SPEAKER_00: I did not do that, but I wish I did.
• 18:44
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 18:45
  SPEAKER_02: Like basically setting up your own visitation hours.
• 18:49
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 18:49
  SPEAKER_00: It's like, hey, come and see the baby, come see us, but then you're not hosting people.
• 18:54
  SPEAKER_00: Like it was so overwhelming when we had Tyson because every family member wanted to come over for dinner.
• 19:00
  SPEAKER_00: And it was like every night for like three weeks, and I'm like, I'm losing it.
• 19:05
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I need people not in my house.
• 19:06
  SPEAKER_00: I just want to be like us for a couple of weeks.
• 19:08
  SPEAKER_02: Like left, not leftover overload, but it was very rich meal overload.
• 19:13
  SPEAKER_00: Our fridge was like bursting at the seas, which like it was very like you feel thankful and grateful that you have all these people, but it was like I remember like our first few nights when we didn't have anyone.
• 19:24
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, I need that back.
• 19:26
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, sipping C's, cool.
• 19:29
  SPEAKER_02: No visitors for the first two weeks to kind of add on to that.
• 19:32
  SPEAKER_00: I also love this.
• 19:34
  SPEAKER_00: I feel like I was more put my foot down with Bennett.
• 19:38
  SPEAKER_00: Like I didn't care if people came, but because of the experience with how many people came with Tyson, I was like, I I'm not doing that.
• 19:44
  SPEAKER_00: Let us get like let us get acclimated as a family of four.
• 19:48
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 19:49
  SPEAKER_00: And then you can plan.
• 19:50
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, it's kind of like when you buy a new house and you're still you move in, even if it's a move-in ready house, you're you have things everywhere.
• 19:58
  SPEAKER_02: Things aren't as structured.
• 20:00
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, people want to see that new house, people want to meet the baby.
• 20:03
  SPEAKER_02: But it's just we're not there yet.
• 20:06
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 20:06
  SPEAKER_02: We need to kind of get our own feet grounded before we can invite people over.
• 20:12
  SPEAKER_00: I'm on board with that.
• 20:12
  SPEAKER_00: Like the sippency and the no two weeks, no visitation primo.
• 20:18
  SPEAKER_02: Like when we just visited my best friend's house, he just bought a new house.
• 20:23
  SPEAKER_02: He bought it middle like over a month ago now.
• 20:27
  SPEAKER_02: But I knew that in my experience when we moved in.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_02: It's like I need that time.
• 20:32
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, you gotta buy and put it together everything.
• 20:34
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 20:36
  SPEAKER_02: Naming the baby after a grandparent.
• 20:39
  SPEAKER_00: I love that.
• 20:41
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, I like family names.
• 20:43
  SPEAKER_00: I don't have any family names really on like in my family.
• 20:47
  SPEAKER_00: Well, you your middle name is named after a little bit of your dad and Yes, my middle name is a mix of my grandmother and my dad.
• 20:55
  SPEAKER_00: Catherine is the middle name.
• 20:57
  SPEAKER_02: It's like my middle name is named after, or is my middle name was my dad's middle name, was his dad's middle name, and I think it was his my great grandpap's first name.
• 21:08
  SPEAKER_02: So the middle name, like Tyson's middle name, is the same middle name as well.
• 21:11
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it like lives on in your yeah.
• 21:14
  SPEAKER_02: So I think things like that pass down.
• 21:16
  SPEAKER_00: I also like I like it when families like say Jonathan's the name and every guy's name, Jonathan.
• 21:21
  SPEAKER_00: If you have a boy, like I don't mind that.
• 21:23
  SPEAKER_00: I think that's a nice nod to your family and to be like respectful if you want or like continue a tradition.
• 21:30
  SPEAKER_00: I just like I don't have any first names in my family that's been like yeah passed down.
• 21:35
  SPEAKER_02: This is kind of like not like naming per a person at like the same name, but LeBron James had his kid, his first son, and he's like, I don't really want him to like have to deal with the same spotlight that I had to.
• 21:48
  SPEAKER_02: I want him to build his own path.
• 21:49
  SPEAKER_02: But he named his kid LeBron James Jr.
• 21:52
  SPEAKER_00: LeBron James.
• 21:54
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 21:55
  SPEAKER_02: Doesn't want to deal with the name.
• 21:56
  SPEAKER_02: You named him your name.
• 21:58
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 21:58
  SPEAKER_02: LeBron James.
• 22:01
  SPEAKER_02: Grandparents having their own nursery.
• 22:05
  SPEAKER_00: Like at their house?
• 22:06
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 22:07
  SPEAKER_00: I think that's really nice when grandparents take that extra step to like have a crib or like all the things that you would want for your kid if you have them there overnight.
• 22:17
  SPEAKER_00: And you're not having to pack up all your shit and take it there.
• 22:22
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 22:22
  SPEAKER_00: I love that.
• 22:23
  SPEAKER_00: Even like a pack and play or something like that.
• 22:25
  SPEAKER_00: I think that's nice.
• 22:26
  SPEAKER_00: I think it's a little strange when they expect you to like give your baby over to them for multiple nights.
• 22:34
  SPEAKER_00: I we didn't have that.
• 22:35
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 22:35
  SPEAKER_00: Like your parents would take our take our kids every once in a while.
• 22:40
  SPEAKER_00: My parents take our kids every once in a while when we have things, like there's a reason for them to go over there.
• 22:44
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 22:45
  SPEAKER_00: But I do know of lots of people that like drop their kids off for like three, four nights in a row, and that's weird to me.
• 22:51
  SPEAKER_00: It if if there's a job that is the reason that you have to do that, I could understand.
• 22:56
  SPEAKER_00: But if you're just trying to like have them take care of your kid because you don't want to take care of them, I think that's so weird.
• 23:01
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 23:02
  SPEAKER_02: I do like it.
• 23:02
  SPEAKER_02: If we it happened more where they would come to us, like if I was traveling for work and you had a wedding that you were there till like late night or something, that yeah, we needed somebody that would be there for the kids, and you do trust the grandparent more than you trust just a random babysitter.
• 23:18
  SPEAKER_02: Not saying not a random babysitter, but if you don't have somebody solid that's available and you bring in somebody random, like it's always a different person.
• 23:27
  SPEAKER_02: Like we had to go through that a lot with our with when we just had Tyson.
• 23:30
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 23:31
  SPEAKER_02: Like random people every few months just like swapping around because our families aren't close enough to be readily available like that.
• 23:40
  SPEAKER_02: Matching mom-grandma outfits at the shower.
• 23:46
  SPEAKER_00: I sometimes think those are a little tacky.
• 23:50
  SPEAKER_00: Like it, I do like the excitement, like people are just excited.
• 23:54
  SPEAKER_00: That's why they wear one that's like, I'm grandma, I'm Gigi, I'm whatever.
• 23:58
  SPEAKER_00: I'm mom, I'm dad, but I'm also just like we know this.
• 24:01
  SPEAKER_00: We know.
• 24:02
  SPEAKER_00: I don't need a shirt to tell me who you are.
• 24:04
  unknown: Yeah.
• 24:05
  SPEAKER_02: We know who you are for this child.
• 24:07
  SPEAKER_01: Correct.
• 24:08
  SPEAKER_02: Speaking of uh the gender reveal videos where it goes around to different people, like I'm the grandma, I'm the mom, I'm your aunt, and I think you're gonna be a boy or girl.
• 24:21
  SPEAKER_00: I personally hate them.
• 24:23
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I think it's because like some of the ones that I see are just like I don't I don't know how to say it in a nice way.
• 24:30
  unknown: Yeah.
• 24:30
  SPEAKER_02: Like people go in there cheering for a particular gender.
• 24:34
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 24:35
  SPEAKER_02: Like wearing all blue, wearing all pink, wearing whatever.
• 24:38
  SPEAKER_02: My mom did wear all blue because she was really like she was rooting for a boy.
• 24:41
  SPEAKER_02: Who was the first my son was the first boy since me in my family, and I have seven nieces that came before him.
• 24:49
  SPEAKER_02: Now she's a great grandmother of two boys and a grandmother of one.
• 24:53
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 24:53
  SPEAKER_02: So the boys are starting to the boys are making a comeback.
• 24:56
  SPEAKER_02: We're making a comeback over here demanding vaccinations for visitors.
• 25:02
  SPEAKER_02: I have no problem with that.
• 25:03
  SPEAKER_00: Like if you're the parents, say you can't come around me if you don't have the TDAP, or I think we had to get T Bat.
• 25:09
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I think you have to as a parent, at least as a mom, I had to get it.
• 25:13
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 25:13
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, what do I have to do?
• 25:14
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, I'm vaccinated on things, but yeah, I think you had to get it.
• 25:17
  SPEAKER_00: I feel like you do.
• 25:18
  SPEAKER_00: I don't remember, but I think if a parent has certain rules about they don't want their kid to get sick, especially when they're little, like they can pick up something and it can be like fatal for them.
• 25:28
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 25:29
  SPEAKER_00: So I think if people are like, if you don't have your vaccinations, you can't come around my kid, I think that's fine.
• 25:34
  SPEAKER_00: That's their choice as a parent.
• 25:36
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 25:37
  SPEAKER_02: All right, last one naming a child a name that will not be so great as an adult.
• 25:43
  SPEAKER_00: I feel bad for the kid.
• 25:45
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 25:45
  SPEAKER_00: Except for somebody recently told me that.
• 25:48
  SPEAKER_00: Whenever we went to that wedding, we sat next to someone.
• 25:50
  SPEAKER_00: I don't remember his name.
• 25:52
  SPEAKER_00: No.
• 25:52
  SPEAKER_00: And we were talking about our kids.
• 25:53
  SPEAKER_02: Maybe it was a name that wasn't good for an adult.
• 25:55
  SPEAKER_00: Well, no, they were talking about Bennett.
• 25:57
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, for being We were talking about the names of our kids, and he told me his kids' names, and I told him, and he was like, Oh, I would never name to my daughter Bennett.
• 26:07
  SPEAKER_00: That's terrible.
• 26:08
  SPEAKER_00: That's a boy's name.
• 26:08
  SPEAKER_02: And I'm like, No, it's gender neutral.
• 26:11
  SPEAKER_02: Like, okay, sir.
• 26:12
  SPEAKER_02: Well, that's really not how to respond.
• 26:14
  SPEAKER_00: I just laughed because I was like, okay.
• 26:15
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that's not as bad.
• 26:17
  SPEAKER_02: Like Benny is a nickname.
• 26:18
  SPEAKER_02: That's a good like growing up name, but Bennett is a full name when she's an adult.
• 26:22
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 26:22
  SPEAKER_02: But there are some names that I'm like, why would you name it that?
• 26:26
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know, even like people just get like too creative, I think.
• 26:28
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 26:29
  SPEAKER_00: They're like stone.
• 26:30
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 26:31
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, what is that?
• 26:32
  SPEAKER_02: Tree.
• 26:34
  SPEAKER_00: There's some too that give me like dog vibes, like Maverick.
• 26:38
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 26:38
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, I don't know.
• 26:39
  SPEAKER_00: That reminds me of like a German Shepherd or something.
• 26:42
  SPEAKER_02: Destiny.
• 26:43
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 26:44
  SPEAKER_00: A lot of people name Nevea.
• 26:45
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, oh.
• 26:46
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 26:47
  SPEAKER_02: Legend or I don't know.
• 26:50
  SPEAKER_02: There's like some of them are cool.
• 26:52
  SPEAKER_00: They're cool, but then it's like, uh, what are they gonna put that on a business card?
• 26:56
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 26:56
  SPEAKER_00: Well, I guess it doesn't matter.
• 26:58
  SPEAKER_02: Like a very cool name, I think, is Thor.
• 27:01
  SPEAKER_02: But every time I hear, if you come up to me and you say, Hi, my name's Thor, I'm gonna think you're the god of thunder.
• 27:06
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I'm not gonna think a superhero name.
• 27:09
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 27:10
  SPEAKER_02: My name's Steve Roger.
• 27:13
  SPEAKER_02: Like Captain America.
• 27:15
  SPEAKER_00: Some people do that.
• 27:15
  SPEAKER_00: They like name their kid after certain things, and I'm like, oh, it's like so tied to a pop culture moment or like a character.
• 27:23
  SPEAKER_02: If it's like a pop culture like movie, you name it after a sports athlete for a pet.
• 27:29
  SPEAKER_02: I like naming like if when people name in the Pittsburgh area, I bet one in every five dogs are named Crosby because of Sidney Crosby.
• 27:39
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, yeah.
• 27:39
  SPEAKER_02: You know, like things like that that happen.
• 27:42
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, but kids' names, I'm like, it is something that they're gonna live with forever.
• 27:45
  SPEAKER_00: Of course, you could change your name as an adult if you don't like it.
• 27:49
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 27:49
  SPEAKER_00: But like it is your name, it is part of your identity, and I do think you need to be a little bit mindful of that, that they're gonna grow up with that name.
• 27:57
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 27:58
  SPEAKER_00: Whatever you give them.
• 28:01
  SPEAKER_00: Think about it.
• 28:02
  SPEAKER_02: Gotta think about it.
• 28:03
  SPEAKER_02: Gotta be smart.
• 28:04
  SPEAKER_02: Will they like it when they're older?
• 28:06
  SPEAKER_02: Or will they get made fun of?
• 28:08
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 28:09
  SPEAKER_02: Or will maybe if they go to apply for a job, it shouldn't be an issue.
• 28:13
  SPEAKER_02: You should just be worried about the actual person and how they are caricature-wise and performance-wise.
• 28:19
  SPEAKER_02: But if Thor's coming in to apply for a job, be like, no.
• 28:24
  SPEAKER_02: If this is if you're like doing something that deals with electricity, you're you're the man for the game.
• 28:28
  SPEAKER_00: You're the guy.
• 28:30
  SPEAKER_00: This segment is brought to you by Ling's Moment.
• 28:32
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• 28:39
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• 28:43
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• 28:50
  SPEAKER_00: Plus, you can reuse them, resell them, or keep pieces from your wedding without worrying about them wilting before the night is over.
• 28:55
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• 29:01
  SPEAKER_02: All right.
• 29:01
  SPEAKER_02: This next segment is the Ask Us Anything Life General Wedding.
• 29:06
  SPEAKER_02: We've got two life ones, two wedding ones.
• 29:10
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 29:11
  SPEAKER_02: First one is happy 10 years.
• 29:12
  SPEAKER_02: We didn't even discuss that.
• 29:13
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
• 29:14
  SPEAKER_02: 10 year anniversary.
• 29:15
  SPEAKER_00: We've been married for 10 years now.
• 29:17
  SPEAKER_02: 10 years as of four or five days ago, depending on when you listen.
• 29:21
  SPEAKER_02: This will come out, it'll be five days ago, right?
• 29:24
  SPEAKER_02: One, two, three, four.
• 29:25
  SPEAKER_02: Five days, yeah.
• 29:26
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 29:26
  SPEAKER_00: It's so crazy how time goes by so fast.
• 29:28
  SPEAKER_00: It was first.
• 29:29
  SPEAKER_00: Ten years was really fast.
• 29:30
  SPEAKER_02: We had a very fun wedding.
• 29:32
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, we did.
• 29:32
  SPEAKER_02: And then very fun life in those ten years.
• 29:35
  SPEAKER_02: A lot of things happened.
• 29:36
  SPEAKER_02: A lot of moves, a lot of kids.
• 29:38
  SPEAKER_02: Added one more dog since we got married.
• 29:41
  SPEAKER_00: Been to Lived in one, two, three, four.
• 29:45
  SPEAKER_02: Well, since we've been married, we lived in what?
• 29:48
  SPEAKER_02: We were in Amelia Island.
• 29:49
  SPEAKER_02: Well, no, we moved to Key Largo after.
• 29:50
  SPEAKER_00: Key Largo, Belvern, and Allison Park.
• 29:52
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 29:53
  SPEAKER_02: Well, we were in Belvern waiting to get a house.
• 29:55
  SPEAKER_02: We moved back and we're waiting to get our house.
• 29:58
  SPEAKER_02: So I would just say Key Largo and Allison Park.
• 30:01
  SPEAKER_02: PA Key Largo, Florida, Montico.
• 30:05
  SPEAKER_02: Anywho, your family always looks like we're having fun together.
• 30:09
  SPEAKER_02: We do.
• 30:10
  SPEAKER_02: What are some of the things that you miss from before we had our kids?
• 30:16
  SPEAKER_00: Ooh, this is an easy one for me.
• 30:19
  SPEAKER_00: Just like getting up, going, having a lot of drinks.
• 30:24
  SPEAKER_00: Like going out with our friends for a crazy night.
• 30:28
  SPEAKER_00: I need like either day drinking or going out with friends and like being able to come home and not have to worry about it.
• 30:33
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, you don't have a responsibility.
• 30:35
  SPEAKER_00: You have a responsibility about yourself, and we had the pets.
• 30:38
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 30:39
  SPEAKER_00: But now there's so many other things to think about.
• 30:41
  SPEAKER_00: Like, do I want to do that?
• 30:43
  SPEAKER_00: That would be fun.
• 30:44
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 30:44
  SPEAKER_02: Can't you?
• 30:45
  SPEAKER_02: Like my only time I really go all out is Steeler games when I go to a game.
• 30:52
  SPEAKER_02: But like other times I'm just like, I hate it if I'm like having if I have too much.
• 30:58
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 30:58
  SPEAKER_02: And then I wake up the next day, like, oh yeah.
• 31:01
  SPEAKER_00: I feel like for special occasions, I'll get to relive how I used to be.
• 31:07
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 31:08
  SPEAKER_02: Like I really enjoy.
• 31:09
  SPEAKER_00: I don't have the kids to take care of the next day because they're usually with a grandparent.
• 31:13
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 31:14
  SPEAKER_02: Like whenever we'd celebrated our anniversary, we got to have a nice dinner out up on Mount Washington.
• 31:19
  SPEAKER_02: First time we ever went to a nice fancy dinner up there, which I like the view.
• 31:23
  SPEAKER_02: But then we didn't have the my the kids stayed at my parents.
• 31:27
  SPEAKER_02: So just waking up and not feeling like you have to be on the red, like you're you're in parent mode as soon as you wake up.
• 31:34
  SPEAKER_02: There was no be in parent mode as soon as so I think just like that that initial wake up, having a full night's sleep would be nice too.
• 31:44
  SPEAKER_02: I think that's sleep.
• 31:47
  SPEAKER_02: What is one tradition that you hope your kids remember whenever they are adults?
• 31:54
  SPEAKER_00: I feel like I feel like we like to do a lot of stuff around the holidays, like fun things, but I would probably say like how we do Christmas morning.
• 32:04
  SPEAKER_00: That's like one of my favorite things that you're like, let me go check if Santa's down there.
• 32:09
  SPEAKER_02: Maybe they pass that down to their family.
• 32:12
  SPEAKER_00: And like I do hope they remember um Elf on the Shelf, you being Zippy McJingle in the baby camera.
• 32:22
  SPEAKER_02: They're gonna listen and zippy is real.
• 32:23
  SPEAKER_02: Zippy is real, zippy is real, and I was hanging out with Zippy before he went off to back to the North Pole that night.
• 32:30
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 32:31
  SPEAKER_02: And we were just chatting.
• 32:32
  SPEAKER_02: Me and him.
• 32:33
  SPEAKER_02: I was at I was chat.
• 32:34
  SPEAKER_02: If you're listening with your kids, I spoiler.
• 32:42
  SPEAKER_02: Was me.
• 32:43
  SPEAKER_00: Give a little sample of Zippy's voice.
• 32:45
  SPEAKER_02: No, I can't.
• 32:45
  SPEAKER_02: I don't even know if I could do it right now.
• 32:47
  SPEAKER_02: I'd be like, oh, I'm I'm zippy.
• 32:49
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 32:50
  SPEAKER_02: And I would go back to my voice right after.
• 32:52
  SPEAKER_02: I'd like be talking to myself, but as Zippy and myself.
• 32:56
  SPEAKER_02: Yes.
• 32:56
  SPEAKER_02: And it was a good time.
• 32:57
  SPEAKER_02: And then I would also do the thing with again, we'll let you know when they come back from the spoilers, but the night of Christmas Eve, like I'll go outside and ring the jingle bells.
• 33:08
  SPEAKER_00: I feel like we do Christmas up.
• 33:10
  SPEAKER_00: So I would say like any of those little things we do at Christmas would be like things that I hope they remember.
• 33:15
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 33:15
  SPEAKER_02: I do like our little anniversary thing that we get the candle of each year, blow it out with the kids.
• 33:21
  SPEAKER_02: Maybe when they're adults, they'll come back and 50 years.
• 33:30
  SPEAKER_02: Like my dentures come out.
• 33:32
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I do like that.
• 33:33
  SPEAKER_00: I don't even know.
• 33:34
  SPEAKER_00: I think we started doing that.
• 33:35
  SPEAKER_00: We did that last year.
• 33:36
  SPEAKER_00: That was the first year.
• 33:36
  SPEAKER_00: But if we continue that, I like it because you can look back on it and you see like a video, and all of us are blowing the candle out.
• 33:43
  SPEAKER_00: So like you see us grow a little bit, everybody grows.
• 33:46
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 33:46
  SPEAKER_02: Well, mainly the kids.
• 33:47
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, the thing that grows different for like my hair that grows in the opposite direction.
• 33:52
  SPEAKER_02: Are these are wedding ones?
• 33:54
  SPEAKER_02: What is something that you believed about weddings early in your career that you've completely changed your mind about?
• 34:00
  SPEAKER_00: Um I would say vendor meals.
• 34:05
  SPEAKER_00: Like when I first started, I felt that the vendor should wait to eat.
• 34:10
  SPEAKER_00: Like my first few one or two years until I was trained by someone that was like, no, they have to eat when the couple's eating so that they could like get up and finish doing their job when speeches or other things are happening.
• 34:21
  SPEAKER_00: So I would say the placement of vendor meals would be one thing that I was 100% incorrect about 12 years ago.
• 34:28
  SPEAKER_00: That now I know better.
• 34:31
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that is true.
• 34:33
  SPEAKER_02: Like the eating portion of it all is like the most downtime you're gonna have throughout the day.
• 34:39
  SPEAKER_02: So eat that meal then.
• 34:42
  SPEAKER_02: And if I had if I need to get my budget down, what is your first recommendation?
• 34:48
  SPEAKER_00: Cut the guess list.
• 34:50
  SPEAKER_00: It's the easiest way to take your budget down quickly.
• 34:53
  SPEAKER_00: Like 10 people.
• 34:55
  SPEAKER_00: If say let's say you cut cut 10 people, that's one less table, one less centerpiece, one less linen, one less chair rental, ten less plates of food, ten less charges at the bar.
• 35:05
  SPEAKER_00: It's uh by far the easiest way to cut back on what you're spending.
• 35:10
  SPEAKER_00: I think some people like aren't sh aren't select enough with their guest list, and it can get out of hand really quickly just due to the amount of people that you have to pay for.
• 35:18
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 35:20
  SPEAKER_02: All right.
• 35:20
  SPEAKER_02: This is VIP table.
• 35:22
  SPEAKER_02: These are the best things that grandma does for you.
• 35:27
  SPEAKER_02: Would you like to go first, Madame?
• 35:30
  SPEAKER_00: I can.
• 35:31
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 35:31
  SPEAKER_00: My first one is you go to school, the nurse calls your parents, uh, you gotta come pick up your kid, they're sick.
• 35:41
  SPEAKER_00: Grandma comes and picks you up, and you go to grandma's house, and she just like has the blanket, makes you soup, puts on like something on the TV, and it's just like hardcore catering to you.
• 35:53
  SPEAKER_00: And then you spend the rest of your sick day there at grandma's until mom and dad come and pick you up.
• 35:58
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, you're probably watching like their her daytime television show.
• 36:02
  SPEAKER_00: The price is right.
• 36:03
  SPEAKER_02: It's a good pick.
• 36:05
  SPEAKER_02: Even like just in general, like my first pick is whenever they make their homemade top-tier dish.
• 36:13
  SPEAKER_02: Like it's their it's their staple.
• 36:15
  SPEAKER_02: Yes.
• 36:16
  SPEAKER_02: Typically you'll find it at the holidays, but when even when you get it and it's not a holiday, and they just wanted to make it.
• 36:22
  SPEAKER_02: Like my grandma was a really keen, like made the best haloopkies.
• 36:26
  SPEAKER_02: I didn't like them growing up, but the haloop, but then I start started to like them, and then it was just all downhill from there for me.
• 36:35
  SPEAKER_02: They needed to be at every event.
• 36:36
  SPEAKER_02: Then she started to like teach everyone how to do it.
• 36:38
  SPEAKER_02: Like my I never got to learn, but I probably probably would not make good haloopkies even if I tried compared to hers.
• 36:45
  SPEAKER_02: Like my mom does a good job.
• 36:47
  unknown: Your mom.
• 36:47
  SPEAKER_02: She'll make them for all the holidays.
• 36:49
  SPEAKER_02: Like I even put like things that my mom makes as a staple because she is a grandma.
• 36:53
  SPEAKER_02: When she makes a nice little home meal, home cooked chicken and biscuits, or she'll do those stuffed shells.
• 37:00
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, good.
• 37:01
  SPEAKER_02: Everything sausage rice.
• 37:03
  SPEAKER_02: Oh my baby.
• 37:05
  SPEAKER_02: And the other one I have, this is like the back on the food kick is whenever you leave and they just send you home with an insane amount of leftovers.
• 37:20
  SPEAKER_02: Like you have a meal for the entire week, and you you I'll have hallukies for breakfast the next morning, type of thing.
• 37:27
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 37:27
  SPEAKER_02: You're a grown boy.
• 37:30
  SPEAKER_02: Gotta keep eating.
• 37:31
  SPEAKER_02: They don't even, my grandmas didn't talk like that.
• 37:33
  SPEAKER_00: No, your grandma didn't.
• 37:34
  SPEAKER_02: But no, like have just an absurd amount of leftovers when you leave their gathering or their house.
• 37:40
  SPEAKER_02: That's even if you just went there to visit and they're like, can I get you anything to go?
• 37:44
  SPEAKER_00: Both of our moms are like that, where they have like cool whip containers or Tupperware containers, and they're like packing up mass amounts of food like when you leave.
• 37:52
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, I love this.
• 37:53
  SPEAKER_02: Like, I just I need you to bring this back though.
• 37:55
  SPEAKER_02: And it's like a cool whip container of to go stuff.
• 37:58
  SPEAKER_00: It's not even a Tupperware.
• 38:01
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that's that will be mine.
• 38:02
  SPEAKER_02: That might end up in the trash too.
• 38:04
  SPEAKER_02: Like even the Haloopkey thing, whatever the tank container taking it home.
• 38:11
  SPEAKER_02: The container was ruined after that.
• 38:13
  SPEAKER_02: It just had all the markings for that red sauce marking.
• 38:16
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 38:17
  SPEAKER_02: This isn't good anymore.
• 38:19
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 38:20
  SPEAKER_00: My next pick is similar to when you're leaving, and they sneak you like a$20 or a$50.
• 38:26
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 38:26
  SPEAKER_00: They're like, you might need this for your gas tank.
• 38:28
  SPEAKER_00: Or like they give you something like some cash.
• 38:31
  SPEAKER_00: I feel like grandparents are good for that, especially a grandma.
• 38:34
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, like you get that extra like the the inflation one where it's like$50 instead of a nice$20.
• 38:40
  SPEAKER_00: You know you're the favorite grandkid.
• 38:44
  SPEAKER_02: It's even like holidays in general.
• 38:47
  SPEAKER_02: They you'll do gifts and like, wait, we got one more for all the grandkids.
• 38:51
  SPEAKER_02: And it's like a in an envelope, you open it up and it's a hundred dollars.
• 38:55
  SPEAKER_02: You're like, whoa, my goodness.
• 38:57
  SPEAKER_02: Holidays were good.
• 38:58
  SPEAKER_02: Um the social security was good this year, grandma.
• 39:02
  SPEAKER_00: She's rolling in the dough.
• 39:04
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I get to pick another one, right?
• 39:06
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 39:07
  SPEAKER_00: My next one is you pick up a hobby, you may not be like good at it, but you're participating in it, and your grandma thinks you are a star.
• 39:16
  SPEAKER_00: Like they're bragging to anyone and everyone about how good you are at whatever activity it was.
• 39:22
  SPEAKER_00: Like for me, they would it would have been about dance.
• 39:25
  SPEAKER_00: You should see my granddaughter dance.
• 39:26
  SPEAKER_00: She's so good.
• 39:27
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 39:28
  SPEAKER_00: Like they, at least the grandmas that I have.
• 39:31
  SPEAKER_00: Well, my grandma that's still living kind of can be a little harsh with her words.
• 39:37
  SPEAKER_00: But I I just feel like grandparents in general brag about their grandkids, like, regardless if they're actually good about something.
• 39:44
  SPEAKER_00: And I feel like that's such a nice thing to be like loved and like talked about, even if you're not good at the activity.
• 39:52
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 39:52
  SPEAKER_00: Participating it, they make it seem like you're so good at it.
• 39:55
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, you're gonna be a shooting star.
• 39:57
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 39:58
  SPEAKER_00: Build that confidence.
• 40:01
  SPEAKER_02: Um the one I had, it's more like grandparent, but it's even doing something like going on a car ride and they make it fun.
• 40:11
  SPEAKER_02: Like my my grandparents, they would take us, like the one would take us up to their cabin in the mountains, and the other one would drive us to the mountains to go to the candy store.
• 40:20
  SPEAKER_02: But like on the way, they would do like the milkshake on in the car.
• 40:24
  SPEAKER_02: Our kids love the milkshake.
• 40:25
  SPEAKER_02: They would do, we would take the bumpy road.
• 40:27
  SPEAKER_02: Like it would make it fun and not just like listening to Elvis, which also was a fun part of it, too.
• 40:34
  SPEAKER_02: But like the the car ride, they would be driving at maximum the speed limit, if not slower.
• 40:41
  SPEAKER_02: But it was still fun.
• 40:42
  SPEAKER_02: Like, we're gonna go the long way because we're gonna take the bumpy road, like made it a good experience.
• 40:48
  SPEAKER_02: And my last pick is like how they operate using social media.
• 40:58
  SPEAKER_02: Like my grandma, whenever she got on social media, she would like her posts would be like she would be asking on her Facebook post, like looking up a recipe.
• 41:11
  SPEAKER_02: Like, how like what is the recipe for this?
• 41:13
  SPEAKER_02: And it would be her post.
• 41:14
  SPEAKER_00: She thinks it's Google.
• 41:15
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 41:16
  SPEAKER_02: Like just not really knowing how to operate social media.
• 41:19
  SPEAKER_02: And like I would get a Farmville invite every other day from my grandma.
• 41:24
  SPEAKER_00: Girl, what are you doing with Farmville at 3 a.m.?
• 41:27
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, like even just using a laptop or a computer, like they don't know how to use it at all.
• 41:32
  SPEAKER_02: You have like we had to go give like laptop or computer 101 just to get her to learn how to use it.
• 41:40
  SPEAKER_02: This is how this is your password, and like everything was right there for her to be able to log in.
• 41:45
  SPEAKER_00: One day that will be us.
• 41:47
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 41:47
  SPEAKER_00: We'll not be able to like figure it out.
• 41:50
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 41:51
  SPEAKER_00: What how do you can't get on the interweb?
• 41:55
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I can't remember my password for TikTok.
• 41:59
  SPEAKER_00: Log me in.
• 42:00
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, my last one is going to be just at your grandparents, they let you like get away with certain things where like you can have extra snacks, or they'll let you have like dessert before dinner.
• 42:16
  SPEAKER_00: Like going to your grandparents is like a little fun escape from reality.
• 42:22
  SPEAKER_02: I feel like.
• 42:22
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, my grandma always had like her candy section in the house.
• 42:26
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, there's always candy.
• 42:27
  SPEAKER_02: But we couldn't have any sweets before noon.
• 42:31
  SPEAKER_02: It had like, but we would look at the clock as soon as it struck noon.
• 42:35
  SPEAKER_02: I'm grabbing a Clark bar.
• 42:36
  SPEAKER_02: You're in that candy candy.
• 42:37
  SPEAKER_00: I'm grabbing a hundred grand bar.
• 42:39
  SPEAKER_02: Like all the candy was always like a little bit stale.
• 42:41
  SPEAKER_02: Stale and old like older candy.
• 42:44
  SPEAKER_02: Like the fridge that had all the sodas.
• 42:47
  SPEAKER_02: It wasn't like a diet coke or a coke.
• 42:50
  SPEAKER_02: It would be RC Cola.
• 42:52
  SPEAKER_02: It would be all the knockoff brand ones.
• 42:54
  SPEAKER_02: They were never like the standard Sprite, Coke, Pepsi.
• 42:59
  SPEAKER_02: It was whatever you got it.
• 43:02
  SPEAKER_02: The Sparkle grocery store.
• 43:04
  SPEAKER_00: There's a grocery store called Sparkle.
• 43:06
  SPEAKER_02: There was.
• 43:06
  SPEAKER_02: It was the one that was in front, like that plaza that's in front of my where Jake's pizza's out.
• 43:11
  SPEAKER_02: Where Dollar General is now.
• 43:12
  SPEAKER_02: Jake's, yeah.
• 43:13
  SPEAKER_02: It was called Sparkle.
• 43:15
  SPEAKER_02: Sparkle.
• 43:16
  SPEAKER_02: We would also go there as because our track at our high school doesn't there's no track.
• 43:21
  SPEAKER_02: So when we would practice, we would go down to Sparkle, grab ice pops, run up to someone's house that was in that same neighborhood, and then just go swim for like 30 minutes, and then we'd run back because we were like the distance runners.
• 43:34
  SPEAKER_02: We didn't really practice, but we did do well.
• 43:37
  SPEAKER_02: We were undefeated at home, mainly because we never played at home.
• 43:42
  SPEAKER_02: The other ones I had was them being like just the first ones.
• 43:46
  SPEAKER_02: Do you got one more?
• 43:47
  SPEAKER_00: No, I I picked all mine, but I was just I only have one more honorable mention, but I'll see if it's on your list.
• 43:52
  SPEAKER_02: I have the first one to show up for like your birthday, a game, a show.
• 43:57
  SPEAKER_02: Like they're always there before the actual like the birthday parties at six, they're there at five o'clock.
• 44:04
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 44:04
  SPEAKER_02: Because they back whenever I was growing up, I used to think, oh, they wanted they just came to get there, but they probably wanted that one-on-one time.
• 44:12
  SPEAKER_02: Kind of like what our parents do with our kids.
• 44:14
  SPEAKER_02: They like to get there.
• 44:15
  SPEAKER_02: A little early.
• 44:16
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 44:17
  SPEAKER_02: And I had them just like during holidays, they would do themed games.
• 44:23
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
• 44:24
  SPEAKER_02: Like Easter, we would do Pudgy Bunny, or she had the game where it was in a brown paper bag and you had to guess the candy bar.
• 44:30
  SPEAKER_02: And if you were right, you got it.
• 44:31
  SPEAKER_02: If you were wrong, you got to pass the candy to the next person.
• 44:34
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, it was just like always like doing different games it during the holidays.
• 44:39
  SPEAKER_02: That the the prizes were little fun gifts type of thing.
• 44:44
  SPEAKER_02: Where you had to guess what was in the bag.
• 44:45
  SPEAKER_02: Sometimes it wasn't even candy.
• 44:47
  SPEAKER_02: And that was it.
• 44:49
  SPEAKER_02: It's all the ones I had.
• 44:50
  SPEAKER_00: And my other one that was on my honorable mention, which now that I'm thinking about it, I'm like, I should have put picked this one, um, was that they just call you to just be like, I was thinking about you.
• 45:00
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 45:00
  SPEAKER_00: I love you.
• 45:01
  SPEAKER_02: Or like they just like would show up to our house unannounced.
• 45:05
  SPEAKER_02: But they were just like my pap would pull in and they just sit in the driveway and we go out there and chat with them, and then they would be on their merry way.
• 45:13
  SPEAKER_00: Grandparents are our special thing.
• 45:15
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 45:15
  SPEAKER_00: If you have good ones.
• 45:16
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and we did.
• 45:18
  SPEAKER_00: We did.
• 45:18
  SPEAKER_00: I do still have one living grandparent.
• 45:20
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I do not.
• 45:21
  SPEAKER_00: G Terry.
• 45:23
  SPEAKER_02: I have none.
• 45:24
  SPEAKER_00: All right.
• 45:25
  SPEAKER_00: If you have any funny stories or crazy stories that you want to submit, submit them to info at weddingprocast.com.
• 45:31
  SPEAKER_00: Label them story submission.
• 45:32
  SPEAKER_00: And if you have not bought your tickets to the big wedding game show, they are on sale.
• 45:36
  SPEAKER_00: They will be on sale until we sell out.
• 45:38
  SPEAKER_02: Yep.
• 45:39
  SPEAKER_02: So the links in the bio for the tickets to purchase.
• 45:42
  SPEAKER_02: Hope to see you all there, and we'll see you next week.
• 45:44
  SPEAKER_00: Bye.