Latest / I Choose Me with Jennie Garth / I CHOOSE ME LIVE BACKSTAGE: Cameron Mathison & Tyler Merritt
Transcript
- 0:01Speaker 1: You're listening to I Choose Me with Jenny Girl. Welcome
- 0:08Speaker 1: back to I Choose Me. I've been inspired and uplifted
- 0:12Speaker 1: through this podcast by some of the most incredible people's stories.
- 0:16Speaker 1: The two men you'll hear from in this episode, Cameron
- 0:20Speaker 1: Matheson and Tyler Merritt, have been through a lot, but
- 0:24Speaker 1: their stories aren't defined by the tragedies. They're defined by
- 0:28Speaker 1: how they chose to respond. Before we begin, a big
- 0:32Speaker 1: thanks to our supporting sponsors HRC Fertility, Mason Pirier and
- 0:38Speaker 1: equip Bags. Now let's jump back in with my friend
- 0:43Speaker 1: Calina Estrinos as she talks to Tyler Merritt. They have
- 0:47Speaker 1: an incredible conversation about Tyler's surprise cancer diagnosis.
- 0:51Speaker 2: I found out because I just went and got my
- 0:53Speaker 2: kolonoscovie because that's what you're supposed to do at a
- 0:55Speaker 2: certain age, and I had no signs, no nothing, and
- 1:00Speaker 2: now I'm getting it treated and so thank god I
- 1:03Speaker 2: got it taken care of early.
- 1:05Speaker 3: Yeah. I was about to say, can we talk about that,
- 1:06Speaker 3: because I feel like this is huge in so many
- 1:10Speaker 3: different communities where people still shy away from going to
- 1:15Speaker 3: the doctor, whether it's because they don't have the means
- 1:18Speaker 3: to do it, or they just don't think it's going
- 1:21Speaker 3: to happen to them. Sure, so can you talk about
- 1:24Speaker 3: how important it is in your journey with it.
- 1:27Speaker 2: I think fear is legit and real meaning. I have
- 1:33Speaker 2: a friend whose father passed away from colon cancer because
- 1:35Speaker 2: he had a fear of needles, and so he waited
- 1:38Speaker 2: to go. He was afraid to just get his blood drawn,
- 1:41Speaker 2: and so he waited until his sixties to get his
- 1:44Speaker 2: first colonoscopy and it ended up being the thing that
- 1:47Speaker 2: took his life. And it was all because of this
- 1:49Speaker 2: fear of needles. So at first I want to say
- 1:52Speaker 2: fear is a real, real thing, but I would challenge
- 1:56Speaker 2: anybody that I care about to not let that fear
- 2:00Speaker 2: from a long life. And that fear can come in
- 2:03Speaker 2: multiple different ways. A lot of people just have fear doctors,
- 2:05Speaker 2: the fear of the unknown, or the fear of finding
- 2:08Speaker 2: out a thing, like some people just don't want to know,
- 2:10Speaker 2: like they would rather just not know. But there is
- 2:14Speaker 2: a piece that comes and going. I took care of
- 2:17Speaker 2: this thing before it got out of control. And then
- 2:20Speaker 2: as far as man, we have such a weird health
- 2:22Speaker 2: insurance world. I'm lucky enough that I've always had a
- 2:27Speaker 2: day job that has had insurance, even though I'm a
- 2:29Speaker 2: writer and I'm an actor. But my friends that are
- 2:31Speaker 2: actors and performers, they really it's hard for them to
- 2:36Speaker 2: get their insurance in line for so many different reasons,
- 2:40Speaker 2: like a lot of the rest of the world. But
- 2:43Speaker 2: I would press in and say, there are certain things
- 2:47Speaker 2: that you have to lean into, whether you're going into
- 2:49Speaker 2: an urgent care and paying out of pocket, whether or
- 2:52Speaker 2: not you are in the marketplace trying to find things,
- 2:56Speaker 2: do something so that you can take care of just
- 2:58Speaker 2: your general basic health, because that could be the difference
- 3:01Speaker 2: between a shorter life and a longer life. And know
- 3:05Speaker 2: that there are those of us that are here that
- 3:07Speaker 2: are cheering you on to do that.
- 3:09Speaker 3: You know, because you've gone through so much and you're
- 3:12Speaker 3: currently going through the treatment right now. What are ways
- 3:16Speaker 3: that you stay positive, what are ways that you stay empowered,
- 3:20Speaker 3: and what are ways that you make sure you get
- 3:23Speaker 3: yourself out of those moments that I know you have
- 3:25Speaker 3: sure where you just look at what's going on and
- 3:29Speaker 3: just think like, oh man, what can I do?
- 3:32Speaker 2: First of all, I get super emotional when I think
- 3:34Speaker 2: about this part. But the simple ground based answer. For me.
- 3:40Speaker 2: The thing that keisimost encourage is I try to spend
- 3:43Speaker 2: as much time as I can with young people because
- 3:46Speaker 2: when you see young people, and when I say young people,
- 3:47Speaker 2: I'm talking about whether it's my friends like little kids
- 3:50Speaker 2: who are you know, three and four and five, or
- 3:53Speaker 2: if it's teenagers. You know, I'm fifty, so I'm at
- 3:56Speaker 2: what they call like, at least in the black community,
- 3:58Speaker 2: unk status status where people are like, what's up unk,
- 4:01Speaker 2: And I'm like, man, I hate it, but I know
- 4:05Speaker 2: it matters when they're like, yeah, have you heard of
- 4:07Speaker 2: this rapper? And I'm like, no, I haven't. I guess
- 4:09Speaker 2: I am unk, you know what I mean. Like, that's
- 4:11Speaker 2: not real music, you know what I mean. But it's
- 4:15Speaker 2: speaking to young people and talking to young people and
- 4:19Speaker 2: seeing the hope and faith that they have. I love
- 4:24Speaker 2: that so many kids in our community are teenagers right
- 4:26Speaker 2: now don't have an issue with the LGBTQ plus community.
- 4:30Speaker 2: They don't have issues with people kind of discovering who
- 4:32Speaker 2: they are in real time like my generation did. So
- 4:37Speaker 2: kind of watching that now inspires me and keeps my
- 4:41Speaker 2: head up. It makes me want to continue to move
- 4:43Speaker 2: forward because I want to continue to see what kind
- 4:46Speaker 2: of beauty these young people are going to ring into
- 4:47Speaker 2: the rest of the world that was beautiful.
- 4:50Speaker 3: You know, this is all about empowerment, and this is
- 4:53Speaker 3: a women's empowerment summit. For I choose me. But why
- 4:56Speaker 3: do you think it's important for you to be here today?
- 4:58Speaker 3: Why is it important for me men to also have
- 5:01Speaker 3: that outlet to feel empowered and to kind of navigate
- 5:05Speaker 3: navigate that tape.
- 5:06Speaker 2: First, I think it's very important to understand that women
- 5:08Speaker 2: do not need us. Let's be very clear, the world
- 5:12Speaker 2: would be better if we just let women run it.
- 5:15Speaker 2: And I'm not just saying that, I'm just saying that
- 5:18Speaker 2: I cannot think as especially as a black man. I
- 5:20Speaker 2: can't think of very many situations in my life where
- 5:24Speaker 2: if I would have just let a woman run it,
- 5:26Speaker 2: it would have been fine. Okay. But with that being said,
- 5:32Speaker 2: I think it says more about us as men to
- 5:34Speaker 2: take on the responsibility to support women, not because they
- 5:38Speaker 2: need it, but because we need to support women because
- 5:43Speaker 2: we are nothing without them, and they need to hear
- 5:46Speaker 2: that and listen. I would like to say I really would,
- 5:50Speaker 2: because it would it would sound good in a book.
- 5:55Speaker 2: As being a writer to say that women need us
- 5:59Speaker 2: and that's why we need to be there. We are
- 6:02Speaker 2: lucky as men to be able to breathe the same
- 6:07Speaker 2: air as these women that are changing the world, and
- 6:11Speaker 2: we are lucky as men to be able to be
- 6:13Speaker 2: in the circle with women that do need some encouragement
- 6:17Speaker 2: and to be able to give that. I don't know
- 6:20Speaker 2: if it's because, you know, even though I have an
- 6:22Speaker 2: incredibly strong father, I don't know if it's because my
- 6:24Speaker 2: mother was so strong. But it's an honor to be
- 6:30Speaker 2: here today. It's an honor to be in a room
- 6:34Speaker 2: full of women that are looking to walk and make
- 6:36Speaker 2: their life better and to walk with more strength. It's
- 6:41Speaker 2: an honor to think that they would even want myself
- 6:45Speaker 2: or Cameron or Ben or vow around at this summit
- 6:51Speaker 2: specifically just to just to say, hi, it's beautiful.
- 6:58Speaker 3: What do you hope these women take away from today,
- 7:00Speaker 3: If there's one thing they could take away from.
- 7:02Speaker 2: It, hmm. I hope that they feel seen at the summit.
- 7:10Speaker 2: I hope that when they get into their cars and
- 7:13Speaker 2: they drive back home or fly home or wherever they
- 7:16Speaker 2: go to, they're able to think to themselves, I feel
- 7:20Speaker 2: like somebody saw me today, I feel like somebody understood
- 7:26Speaker 2: that my place in the world is significant in who
- 7:30Speaker 2: I am matters. I think Jenny is doing an incredible
- 7:34Speaker 2: job of making sure that that happens today. I just
- 7:37Speaker 2: hope that that sticks. I hope that when they wake
- 7:40Speaker 2: up tomorrow they can remember today and think to themselves
- 7:44Speaker 2: the way that I felt yesterday should extend into my
- 7:46Speaker 2: Monday and Tuesday and Wednesday because I was seen on
- 7:50Speaker 2: that Saturday.
- 7:51Speaker 3: That's beautiful. Thanks Kleina Estrito's backstage at the Women's Empowerment
- 8:03Speaker 3: Summit for I Choose Me. I have Cameron Matheson here,
- 8:07Speaker 3: Thanks for being here, Thank you for having me. We're
- 8:09Speaker 3: so excited to talk to you. And also you're part
- 8:12Speaker 3: of the very first mannal Man panel.
- 8:16Speaker 4: Yes. For those that didn't get the connection, yes Man
- 8:18Speaker 4: panel Manal.
- 8:19Speaker 3: How has that been so far? And what was it
- 8:21Speaker 3: like for you to know that, you know, they reached
- 8:23Speaker 3: out to you to be part of that.
- 8:24Speaker 4: Well, it meant a lot to me that that Jenny asked,
- 8:27Speaker 4: because you know, we go back and we have an
- 8:30Speaker 4: interesting kind of connect we have, you know, we work
- 8:32Speaker 4: together many times, and then we also have an interesting
- 8:35Speaker 4: connection that we both were in these amazing sort of
- 8:38Speaker 4: Eastern psychology philosophy classes but as classes for a while
- 8:42Speaker 4: and meditation, and we really connected through that as well.
- 8:45Speaker 4: And I guess I technically kind of let her know
- 8:50Speaker 4: about them back in the day and she never She
- 8:52Speaker 4: really is very grateful for that, and that makes me
- 8:54Speaker 4: feel great because I you know, it's just a part
- 8:57Speaker 4: of my life, but being here and being part of it.
- 9:00Speaker 4: But I thought was an interesting take on a sort
- 9:03Speaker 4: of a woman's empowerment kind of day having some dudes
- 9:06Speaker 4: show up, and it was helpful for me too to
- 9:08Speaker 4: hear Val and Tyler and Ben share their answers and
- 9:13Speaker 4: what's happened for them, And yeah, it was, it was.
- 9:16Speaker 4: It was meaningful too for myself.
- 9:17Speaker 3: Was there something that you learned from that panel yourself
- 9:21Speaker 3: that you can take away from from today.
- 9:24Speaker 4: I think one of the things is something that Ben
- 9:26Speaker 4: talks a lot about in that is male connection. And
- 9:28Speaker 4: I know he may try and do that for the
- 9:31Speaker 4: younger generations. But at my age, I was married for
- 9:34Speaker 4: a very long time, and you know, my I worked
- 9:37Speaker 4: very very hard, and so I had my work, and
- 9:39Speaker 4: I had my wife, and I had my kids, and
- 9:41Speaker 4: I didn't have a lot of social connection other than that.
- 9:45Speaker 4: So then when that ended, that marriage ended, I've struggled
- 9:50Speaker 4: with that. I've struggled, like and then I've been out dating,
- 9:52Speaker 4: so I've been like making female connections per se, but
- 9:57Speaker 4: not really spending a lot of time on you know, nursing,
- 10:02Speaker 4: nurturing friendships and male relationships. So that's something that was like, Man,
- 10:07Speaker 4: I got to step that up.
- 10:09Speaker 3: Do you feel like there's been a shift in society
- 10:11Speaker 3: to allow men and boys to feel comfortable to have
- 10:18Speaker 3: those male relationships and not feel like they have to
- 10:21Speaker 3: be so strong get in touch with their emotions.
- 10:25Speaker 4: Yeah, I feel like the shift maybe that you're alluding to, Like,
- 10:28Speaker 4: I think guys have always wanted to hang out and
- 10:31Speaker 4: play golf and go on trips and whatever and go
- 10:34Speaker 4: you know, who knows what. I think that kind of
- 10:38Speaker 4: a guy connection has been socially acceptable for a long time,
- 10:41Speaker 4: and I think you're right on some level with the
- 10:45Speaker 4: way things have been going in society, and there's more
- 10:50Speaker 4: emphasis on connecting a little bit more in a meaningful way.
- 10:55Speaker 4: You know, I have friends I've known for a long
- 10:57Speaker 4: time that I would love to connect with in you know,
- 11:02Speaker 4: a more meaningful way and just sort of really hear
- 11:05Speaker 4: how they're doing and what their challenges are and struggles
- 11:08Speaker 4: and how they're getting through it, and be there and
- 11:10Speaker 4: talk and just you know, that sort of a thing
- 11:13Speaker 4: is I think probably more accepted today than it ever was.
- 11:18Speaker 4: And I'm not really part of that a circle like that,
- 11:21Speaker 4: but I'd.
- 11:22Speaker 3: Like to be very nice. Let's talk about things that
- 11:25Speaker 3: have been challenging. Wildfires in LA were extremely challenging. You
- 11:30Speaker 3: lost your home. I did, Yes, What has been the
- 11:34Speaker 3: rebuilding process? What has it been like for you? And
- 11:37Speaker 3: how have you been able to keep moving forward?
- 11:42Speaker 4: Yeah, it's been really really hard. And I know it's
- 11:49Speaker 4: sort of maybe an obvious and boring answer, but it's
- 11:53Speaker 4: been harder than I ever would have imagined, harder than
- 11:59Speaker 4: you know. I've through the decades, have seen other wildfires
- 12:04Speaker 4: take the occasional house here, and they're usually like in
- 12:07Speaker 4: LA and you feel horrible, but you don't really know.
- 12:13Speaker 4: And with that said, also, different people have different relationships
- 12:18Speaker 4: with their home. Some people are renting, some people flip homes.
- 12:23Speaker 4: Some people have been there for a few years. Some
- 12:26Speaker 4: people have lived in that home and renovated every square
- 12:30Speaker 4: inch of that home over decades and have every single
- 12:33Speaker 4: piece of existence of their life on earth in that home,
- 12:36Speaker 4: and their children were raised there, and everything of their
- 12:38Speaker 4: children's life was in that home. And when you lose that,
- 12:42Speaker 4: it's very different. And that was our case. So you know,
- 12:46Speaker 4: you get a lot of different reactions from people. Oh man,
- 12:48Speaker 4: that's tough. Well, it's just stuff. Though at least you're okay,
- 12:51Speaker 4: Thank goodness, you're safe. That is one of honestly, just
- 12:54Speaker 4: for people listening. Of course, at least we're safe. Of course,
- 12:59Speaker 4: it's just you know, on some level stuff. Try not
- 13:03Speaker 4: to say that to people because it is so it
- 13:07Speaker 4: is one of the most triggering things in my life. Actually,
- 13:10Speaker 4: like I'm handling the loss of everything of my life
- 13:14Speaker 4: better than I handle those people. That's a funny thing.
- 13:18Speaker 4: So just watch that because again, like you don't know,
- 13:20Speaker 4: you know, and it's it's so much more than stuff.
- 13:24Speaker 4: It's so much there's irreplaceable things, but it's it's not
- 13:28Speaker 4: about the stuff at all. It's so tragic and the
- 13:31Speaker 4: memories and the house was a part part of our family.
- 13:34Speaker 4: And so anyway, all that to say that came after
- 13:39Speaker 4: my own life threatening cancer. Then my mom was diagnosed
- 13:42Speaker 4: with cancer and lost her life. And then my wife
- 13:45Speaker 4: of twenty three years wanted to divorce and left, and
- 13:47Speaker 4: then my dog died, and then I lost my house,
- 13:51Speaker 4: and so it was like a lot of big things,
- 13:53Speaker 4: a lot of loss happened one thing after that, and
- 13:58Speaker 4: so the rebuilding process and all that has sort of
- 14:01Speaker 4: taken a back seat in many ways. It's the land
- 14:04Speaker 4: is still there, and I'm probably just going to move
- 14:08Speaker 4: into a different place for a while until we rebuild,
- 14:11Speaker 4: until I rebuild with my kids. But there's still tons
- 14:16Speaker 4: to be grateful for. And I'm trying to be a
- 14:18Speaker 4: positive guy and a resilient guy, and you know, try to,
- 14:21Speaker 4: you know, focus on gratitude, focus on compassion. Fifteen thousand
- 14:25Speaker 4: families lost, sorts. Things like this are happening around the
- 14:27Speaker 4: world all the time, people going through this. So you
- 14:30Speaker 4: use your own experience to develop, like, you know, a
- 14:34Speaker 4: connection or a compassion for others. And then yeah, just
- 14:39Speaker 4: sort of use it as a way to improve myself
- 14:42Speaker 4: inwardly as the goals strengthen myself.
- 14:44Speaker 3: And you know, you mentioned the rebuilding process when it
- 14:46Speaker 3: comes to the home, but you mentioned so many things.
- 14:48Speaker 3: I mean, cancer, divorce, your dog, you know, your home,
- 14:52Speaker 3: your kids, going to college. Those are a lot of
- 14:55Speaker 3: life changing moments that happened to you in your life.
- 15:06Speaker 3: So when it comes to rebuilding or possibly restructuring, how
- 15:10Speaker 3: are you able to kind of restructure things to make
- 15:13Speaker 3: sure you could continue you know, you could move forward,
- 15:17Speaker 3: you could stay empowered and true to yourself, also deal
- 15:19Speaker 3: with the grief, but also know that you know you
- 15:21Speaker 3: still want to put one foot in front of the
- 15:23Speaker 3: other moving forward. How did you navigate that?
- 15:25Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm still navigating it. And it's a great question,
- 15:29Speaker 4: and I think one that I don't really unfortunately probably
- 15:34Speaker 4: can't give you like a super great answer because I'm struggling,
- 15:37Speaker 4: you know, like it's not it's not easy, it's just not.
- 15:42Speaker 4: And I have moments of doing really well, and then
- 15:45Speaker 4: I have moments of doing being in a lot of
- 15:47Speaker 4: pain and feeling lost and thinking, three years ago I
- 15:50Speaker 4: had a beautiful home with a beautiful you know, close
- 15:53Speaker 4: wife and beautiful kids and my dog and my like
- 15:56Speaker 4: my job I have, I'm also leaving the time I
- 15:58Speaker 4: lost my job too, and and then three like it
- 16:01Speaker 4: like it just all got it was all God. So
- 16:03Speaker 4: there's like this shockingly trans transforming kind of time or
- 16:08Speaker 4: the next chapter came very abruptly. And yeah, So to
- 16:12Speaker 4: answer your question, though, I feel like in my most
- 16:17Speaker 4: I think the main way for me to restructure, the
- 16:20Speaker 4: main way to feel like I'm taking steps forward, the
- 16:23Speaker 4: main way that i'm I'm I'm i'm it's my responsibility
- 16:26Speaker 4: to replace my child, my kid's childhood home too, right,
- 16:29Speaker 4: their mom isn't isn't in a place to do that.
- 16:32Speaker 4: And so the the main way that I do all
- 16:34Speaker 4: of that is by first really deeply accepting what's happened.
- 16:40Speaker 4: So even the way I'm talking to you now, there's
- 16:42Speaker 4: there's like a level of rejection like this can't all
- 16:46Speaker 4: be happening, Like there's no way these things happened. Whenever,
- 16:50Speaker 4: well they did. It happened, and you got to accept
- 16:54Speaker 4: it patiently and holy and that actually has a very
- 16:57Speaker 4: peaceful effect on the mind. And from that space now
- 17:01Speaker 4: you can be more solution oriented. Okay, so this did
- 17:04Speaker 4: really happen. Man, it's hard to believe, but it did.
- 17:06Speaker 4: You know, just accept it, accept it, accept it, accept it.
- 17:10Speaker 4: And it doesn't mean I sit back in a corner,
- 17:11Speaker 4: curled up in a ball and get beaten up like
- 17:13Speaker 4: it you just you know, now I can Okay, so
- 17:16Speaker 4: now what? And so I'm looking at buying a new
- 17:18Speaker 4: place until i can rebuild. I'm talking to architects about rebuilding.
- 17:21Speaker 4: I'm going in the lawsuit against con Edison because they
- 17:23Speaker 4: were inadvertently the ones that started the fire. I'm seeing
- 17:29Speaker 4: houses and sending videos to my kids because they're very
- 17:32Speaker 4: much involved. There's many houses that I would have bought
- 17:34Speaker 4: already with that they didn't want. They didn't feel like
- 17:36Speaker 4: it was their home, and I'm like, fine, I'm waiting,
- 17:38Speaker 4: like we'll do this together. I want, you know. So
- 17:40Speaker 4: I'm doing things like that. I'm trying to stay busy
- 17:42Speaker 4: with work. On the relationship side. I started dating and
- 17:46Speaker 4: getting out there again, and probably a little too much,
- 17:49Speaker 4: to be honest, like it was almost a distraction. I
- 17:51Speaker 4: wasn't really probably ready for all that. So I'm trying
- 17:54Speaker 4: to take more time. I'm going to my classes of
- 17:56Speaker 4: meditation and spiritual training and things that can help me
- 18:00Speaker 4: feel happy and peaceful. So there's steps I'm taking in
- 18:03Speaker 4: the right direction, and then there's many that I take
- 18:06Speaker 4: steps back, you know, like you know, but I I uh,
- 18:09Speaker 4: it's it. I think the question that you asked is
- 18:13Speaker 4: probably good for me to try to answer home alone
- 18:16Speaker 4: with a piece of paper, you know, in a quiet time,
- 18:20Speaker 4: and and really contemplate and write some things down might
- 18:23Speaker 4: be wrong, and then cross them out and try like
- 18:25Speaker 4: and really kind of get like a little bit of
- 18:27Speaker 4: a like a map as to what some some mixed
- 18:31Speaker 4: clear steps are, because right now it feels a little phonetic.
- 18:33Speaker 4: It feels a little like I don't know, yeah, where
- 18:38Speaker 4: am I on this? And then this gets taken away
- 18:40Speaker 4: and you got a new lawsuit and new emails, and
- 18:41Speaker 4: then you've got the insurance collectors and then you've got
- 18:44Speaker 4: you know, I'm renting right now. But like like it's
- 18:46Speaker 4: it's it's just it's crazy. It's whatever you think people
- 18:52Speaker 4: like it is logistically, emotionally and financially so crazy. It's
- 19:01Speaker 4: crazy when something like this happens and you have like
- 19:03Speaker 4: all your eggs in one basket. Right again, if you
- 19:06Speaker 4: have all your childhood stuff at home with your parents
- 19:08Speaker 4: and you're just renting here, and that's horrible. But it's different,
- 19:12Speaker 4: you know, it's different levels. So I'm just kind of
- 19:15Speaker 4: I'm just navigating doing my best well.
- 19:17Speaker 3: And I know a lot of people use this phrase
- 19:19Speaker 3: all the time, but you have to make sure you
- 19:20Speaker 3: give yourself some grace too, because that's a lot of
- 19:22Speaker 3: stuff back to back to deal with and have to,
- 19:25Speaker 3: you know, maneuver through the best way possible. So when
- 19:30Speaker 3: you are with yourself present in the moment, what's the
- 19:36Speaker 3: one way you choose yourself? Maybe this week? What did
- 19:40Speaker 3: you do this week that made you say, you know what,
- 19:42Speaker 3: I'm going to choose myself in this moment.
- 19:44Speaker 4: It's that's it, Like I knew that that sort of
- 19:47Speaker 4: question would come up obviously being here. It's what Jenny's
- 19:49Speaker 4: putting out there, and I think it's an amazing thing.
- 19:53Speaker 4: And my answer might seem like I'm not choosing myself,
- 19:56Speaker 4: but it is the absolute best gift I can give myself.
- 20:01Speaker 4: It's the happiest I feel, the most peaceful, I feel
- 20:05Speaker 4: the best I sleep, the best version of myself that
- 20:09Speaker 4: I can be for others. And that is when m hmm.
- 20:14Speaker 4: I I take my inner work very seriously. I do.
- 20:20Speaker 4: I try, you know, through different spiritual teachings and meditation classes.
- 20:25Speaker 4: Jenny talks about her Buddhism classes all the time. So
- 20:28Speaker 4: those are the classes that I, eventually, you know, brought
- 20:30Speaker 4: her to and that we go to together. But whatever
- 20:34Speaker 4: that means for people. Right. Of course, there's many different
- 20:36Speaker 4: faith systems out there, and there's some beautiful teachings in
- 20:39Speaker 4: all of them, and I love them all. There's but
- 20:43Speaker 4: my teachings are really work well for me. And when
- 20:47Speaker 4: I'm so, what does that mean? So that means that
- 20:50Speaker 4: I'm watching my mind. I'm training in training and working
- 20:55Speaker 4: at reducing negative states of mind like reckgizing and reducing
- 21:01Speaker 4: things like anger or attachment and grasping and wanting needing
- 21:05Speaker 4: to help me feel better from the outside instead of
- 21:07Speaker 4: the inside out. Uh, you know, watching anxiety, watching depression,
- 21:12Speaker 4: watching fear, jealousy, all these sort of negative states of mind,
- 21:16Speaker 4: and then applying appropriate and effective opponents like learning to
- 21:21Speaker 4: love and cherish others, developing compassion, developing patient acceptance, working
- 21:25Speaker 4: on gratitude, selflessness. You know, there's there's beautiful virtuous minds
- 21:31Speaker 4: that you can replace some of these negativities. So when
- 21:33Speaker 4: I'm training in that, and I like to try to
- 21:36Speaker 4: train as hard in that as I do on my
- 21:38Speaker 4: outer stuff like the body and the gym and the
- 21:40Speaker 4: nutrition when I'm but when I'm doing that, it is
- 21:44Speaker 4: by far not even close the happiest I am the
- 21:49Speaker 4: most peaceful. It gives my life the most meaning. I'm
- 21:54Speaker 4: the best version of myself for others, and and that's
- 21:59Speaker 4: that's I have. I've been great, Truthfully, in this last year,
- 22:01Speaker 4: I've gotten away from that because it's just been a
- 22:03Speaker 4: lot logistically crazy and busying. But I'm getting back in
- 22:07Speaker 4: and I'm like, oh yeah, oh I forgot. I can
- 22:11Speaker 4: actually train my mind like I trained my body, and
- 22:15Speaker 4: it's like, it's just so beautiful. And of course I've
- 22:19Speaker 4: been doing this for twenty years, so it's silly that
- 22:21Speaker 4: I would forget. But I've had some challenging circumstances, so,
- 22:24Speaker 4: like you say, I try to give myself grice.
- 22:27Speaker 2: Not great that either.
- 22:29Speaker 3: Bravos. That was amazing, Thank you.
- 22:31Speaker 1: Thank you so much. To my kind friends Cameron Matheson
- 22:35Speaker 1: and Tyler Merritt, I hope you are as inspired as
- 22:38Speaker 1: I am by those conversations. So, you know what, let's
- 22:41Speaker 1: all go out there and let's do this. Let's choose ourselves.