Latest / Legacy Stories / Rooted in Family: Kevin Young Honors His Father, J.D. Young, Jr.

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Rooted in Family: Kevin Young Honors His Father, J.D. Young, Jr. · Legacy Stories

• 0:06
  Welcome to Legacy Stories. I'm your host, Steve Young.
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  This podcast is about the people and our families who have shaped
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  who we are, the ones whose stories and influence we carry
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  with us every day. In each episode, I sit down with
• 0:22
  a guest to hear about someone special in their family and the
• 0:26
  legacy they've left behind. Coming up, we hear about a
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  father larger than life, a man who welcomed everyone with an
• 0:43
  unwavering love and whose sense of place and family continues to
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  anchor the generations that follow.
• 0:55
  My guest today is my cousin Kevin Young.
• 0:59
  Kevin's father, along with my dad are two of eight children
• 1:04
  and Kevin and I are two of 23 young family grandchildren.
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  We are a tight knit bunch and I'm happy to welcome him to the
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  show to visit. About a treasured member of our
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  family. Kevin, welcome to Legacy
• 1:20
  Stories. Thanks, Steve.
• 1:22
  I really appreciate you doing this with me and particularly as
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  a member of the family. This is going to be a really
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  special episode. I was wondering though, before
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  we begin to talk about who you came to honor today, why don't
• 1:36
  you tell everyone a little bit more about?
• 1:38
  You Well, and a little about me, I live in New York City.
• 1:42
  I grew up in Memphis, TN. I'm 64 years old and I've been
• 1:48
  living in New York for 3536 years.
• 1:51
  These many years I've worked in corporate media for Showtime
• 1:55
  Networks, for Paramount, in their legal groups in terms of
• 1:59
  contract negotiation, writing contracts and the contract
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  administration. Well, tell us, who are you
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  honoring today? Well.
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  Today I wanted to honor JD Young, my dad.
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  Uncle JD, an amazing guy. Tell us about your father by
• 2:19
  painting a picture of the time and place in which he grew up.
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  Well, my dad, she's born in Itawamba County, Mississippi, on
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  a farm, rural existence, many brothers and sisters.
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  It's interesting that that whole kind of way of growing up has
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  become more special to me over all these years.
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  And I didn't really appreciate as much as I should have when I
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  was, you know, a teenager. I.
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  Think that's true for all of us. I think we all come to
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  appreciate things in a different way as we get older.
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  What are aspects of the way he grew up that you do appreciate
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  more now? Well, I think just reflecting on
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  what it must have been like for them to grow up there and to
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  help our dads and their brothers and sisters grew up as a tight
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  knit family and that's just been underscored every year that has
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  passed. Yeah, it's really interesting
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  that this has passed down not only through time, but through
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  changing culture, right? Yet it's still so important to
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  our extended family. I look forward to hearing how
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  you would describe your dad. What was he?
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  Like, Oh my gosh, my dad was extremely outgoing.
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  He had a great laugh. He was curious with no judgment,
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  really. I mean, that was the thing about
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  that. My dad would ask all kinds of
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  questions and want to know everything he could about any
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  topic, but also without any kind of judgment.
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  And he could not appreciate more where he came from than he did.
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  My parents lived in Memphis for, you know, all the time I was
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  growing up until I was 18. And we wanted to move back to
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  Tupelo and how he lit up once he moved back there.
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  He just kind of blossomed into the men of the countryside.
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  So yeah, he was. He was always out and about.
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  We used to go fishing. We used to do camping and a lot
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  of that be kept up for as long as he could.
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  He was a proud cultivator of his garden.
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  He loved growing vegetables. And we both have a huge fondness
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  for pickup trucks, which he always had.
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  These are those things that are coming to me.
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  You know, I'm thinking of when I think of my dad.
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  Yeah. He he certainly was our larger
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  than life family member, but also what I always thought about
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  your father was his sense of identity was 100% rooted in
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  family and place 100. Percent.
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  I mean, more than anyone I've ever met, maybe.
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  And he so loved imparting that love to other people.
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  That's such a special part of the person that he was.
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  You know, Dad's favorite time of the year was Christmas.
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  I mean, hands down. Yeah.
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  Oh, sure. Yeah.
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  And when he and mom bought the family home place where for
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  years and years the young family Christmas had been held, they
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  continued to host those gatherings on Christmas Day up
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  until he passed. I remember it well.
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  I remember him sitting in his recliner with people gathered
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  around him, just hanging on his every word.
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  And I think he was just literally in heaven doing that.
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  Yeah, he was. And then he, you know, I mean,
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  the last Christmas, I think he passed away on New Year's Eve.
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  That's right. Just several days after that,
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  yeah. Do you have any stories about
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  your dad that come to mind that you would like to tell us about?
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  Well, the one story that I do enjoy telling and people are
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  always kind of taken aback by was I was in my 20s when I came
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  out to my parents. And to my surprise was Dad's
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  kind of taking it in stride and asking a lot of questions to try
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  to understand. And again, that was part of his
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  curiosity and for him to try and come around to understanding.
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  Was there a cause? It was a he of 'cause, you know,
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  it was just really heartwarming at the time.
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  I and I was very cognizant of that when we were having these
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  discussions. It wasn't just a one time
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  conversation because there were times after that, but they were
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  always great conversations and I never felt like I had to be
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  guarded in any sense because he was truly, truly wanting to
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  understand. And yeah, from that point
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  forward, then that just kind of opened the doors to all kinds of
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  conversations, which was such a gift.
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  Well, you know what, I think of those things as opening gates
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  and you know you as a member of the gay community certainly have
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  lots of friends who did not have as positive an experience right
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  speaking with their parents. And so for a fellow that did not
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  have any experience with this subject to to indicate his love
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  for you in such a way as to to be open and curious as a gift.
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  Special thing for sure. That's just a that's a nugget
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  about my dad that I think is a key to understanding who he was.
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  Yeah, that's so true. That leads me to my next
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  question, which is what would you say was the role of faith in
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  your Father's life? Church, faith, belief.
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  Just curious what your perception is.
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  Oh, huge. I think that that was #1 But I
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  think again, going back to what we were talking about, OK, I've
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  got a geese on and how do those things comport with one another?
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  I think that was one of the things my dad was most grounded
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  in was his faith. I grew up.
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  I've been baptized Methodist, Baptist and Presbyterian.
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  And as a result of my parents, you know, going from one church
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  to the other when necessary. You're covered three times over.
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  I'm covered three times over, but it it was a source of
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  comfort for dad and and grounding.
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  I have a fun story to tell you about your father in church.
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  It was toward the end of his life, and he was still his
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  Sunday school class as teacher. And I happened to be in town and
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  stayed with your mother and father, and he invited me to
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  come with him to his Sunday school class.
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  So I said, sure, I'd be happy to go.
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  And this was the small Belden United Methodist Church, yes,
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  which was a church that the family had actually attended
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  even back in the old days. And tell Nita again, he would
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  keep that legacy going by being a Sunday school teacher there.
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  So we show up. And at this point, your father
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  is suffering from COPD. And that particular day, he was
• 9:19
  feeling out of breath. And he goes, Steve, I don't
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  think I've got enough air to teach this here, teach the
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  Sunday school lesson. And Holden the fly hands me this
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  book. And I wound up teaching the
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  Sunday school class at Belden Methodist Church.
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  Wow. I've never heard that, Steve.
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  That's. Still, I just.
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  It's just one thing about your dad though, was why wouldn't you
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  just. Exactly.
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  Yeah. I mean, what's wrong?
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  Is there a problem? You know?
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  Yeah. And that was your dad's
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  approach, I think, to just life in general.
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  I mean, you just took life by the tail.
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  And he's having a good time. I'd like to ask you a couple of
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  different questions that'll come at some pieces about your dad.
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  The first one is when you think about your father, what values
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  do you think he held most dear? That's a really good one.
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  I think that from my dad, he was grounded in appreciating life in
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  general and your family. Those seem to be what made the
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  most sense to him and also gave him the most comfort and joy
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  about just being. And also his sense of humor, you
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  know, that was something that and his lightheartedness.
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  I mean, he could be a very serious man.
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  You know, he was an MP in the Marines, so he had that side of
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  him that I didn't see that often, but he just knew it was
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  there. But he was he was just someone
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  who appreciated nothing more than having his family around
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  and having space. Around a related question is
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  what do you think are some of the greatest lessons he's left
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  you with? Well I think the greatest lesson
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  he's left me with is never to judge a situation or someone
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  just by 1 interaction. I've learned from him in terms
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  of just my getting to know him much more as I got older.
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  Is that whole different side of a person that you come to know
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  and by asking your own questions like he did in me, like I did to
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  him, And I think that has carried over in how I approach
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  people in general. One of the things I've always
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  valued about our family is that there's a legacy of respect.
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  Yeah, that's been passed along, and your father certainly
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  embodied that. He just respected people
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  regardless of their station and certainly regardless of their
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  race. Oh absolutely.
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  But yes, 100%. Yeah, that's that's a gift
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  that's kept on giving for me. Well, I'm glad you mentioned
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  that, see, because the times I think I might take it for
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  granted because it, that didn't even pop to mind.
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  But that's something that definitely was ingrained in us.
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  We were just brought up not to see things that way or be
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  respectful anyway, to be respectful of people no matter
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  what. And so that's a huge legacy, I
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  think. Yeah.
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  I mean, I think you said the right word.
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  Legacy. Yeah.
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  You know, nobody is made by themselves.
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  They're made by what's poured into them.
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  I I believe. And boy, did we get fortunate.
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  We did. To to be able to have the family
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  that poured into us. And your father is a shining,
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  shining example. So, well, as we wrap up today,
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  I'm going to ask you one last question and you can take your
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  time with this. OK?
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  If you were given the gift of one more day with your dad, what
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  would you do? What would I do?
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  I think I would love the opportunity to go fishing or
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  camping with him one more time because he and I didn't do that
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  again after I was in my early 20s and being who I am now.
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  And I just would love, I would love that more than anything to
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  just for he and I to have that chance to go sit in this fishing
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  boat that on the middle of the lake camp for a weekend.
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  And I would I like to believe it would be as much of AA gift for
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  him as it would for me, but more so for me.
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  I so appreciate the opportunity to at least give a very small
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  amount of information about my dad in this podcast because he
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  meant the world to me. Thank you Steve for letting me
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  have this time for these words. Well, you are more than welcome,
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  Kevin. Thank you so much.
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  Absolutely. Thank you.
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  All right, see you man, take care.
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  Thanks for listening. To see photographs and much
• 14:30
  more, visit us at Legacy Stories dot US.
• 14:35
  And now, as a special gift, we'll close today with JD
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  himself, an excerpt from the public television documentary
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  Our American Family, The Youngs. What I remember most about as a
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  kid is when you wasn't in school, you was in the field
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  working from about sun up to sunbound.
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  It was work, and believe it or not, after doing all that work
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  during the daytime and after supper, I can remember our dad
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  and mother and little grandmother be sitting on the
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  front porch and all of us kids would be out in the yard
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  playing. Dad was strict, strict.
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  I don't know. For some reason, though, that
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  didn't have a big impact on me. I got a whipping 14 days out of
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  14. I didn't do a bath every day
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  during the summer months. I can remember going out to the
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  where we'd go up water to COO the milk out of the well and
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  we'd stick a leg down in a cold barrel of water and wash the
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  dust or whatever else was running off.
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  And that was our bath. For body wise, probably the
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  whole week except for dishwashing your neck and ears.
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  You got a pretty good bath on the side of it and that was it.