Latest / Ridiculous History / Ridiculous Royal Deaths, Part One: Revenge of the Buck-Toothed

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Ridiculous Royal Deaths, Part One: Revenge of the Buck-Toothed · Ridiculous History

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Ridiculous History is a production of I Heart Radio. Welcome
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: to the show, Ridiculous Historians. Thank you, as always so
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: much for tuning in. Let's give a very special holiday
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: shout out to our super producer Max extra credit Williams.
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: What I want to jump in here real quick. I
• 0:42
  Speaker 1: got some beef I got in the air and uh no, no,
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: as my witness, you're gonna help me. Okay, No, what
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: do you think of that hardcore bowling Ben was given
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: me yesterday? Making making fun of my phone? Now listen,
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: now listen. Okay, First of all, I took it that
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: way initially because we were on a group chat, and
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: it's always always the odd man, odd human out when
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: everyone has a has a you know, iPhone with the
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: blue text and all of that except for one, it
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: sort of borks the whole chat, you know what I mean.
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: So I definitely took Ben's subtle suggestion of hey, how'd
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: you like a free iPhone as a bit of a
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: boa shots fired. But I think Ben really was just
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: kind of try to be nice. I don't think he
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: was using it in that way, but it was it
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: was read that way, I think by both of us.
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: But then Ben so no, it was just a open
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: palmed offer for a nice gift. Alright, this is it
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: for Banham. Also, Max, can I interest you in an iPhone?
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: Nol l O L shots fired? So no was hyping
• 1:42
  Speaker 1: it up. So maybe no Old deserves the blame for this.
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: I don't know, but I digress. I was. I was
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: the beef stir? Is that a thing? Can you stir beef?
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: You know? Yeah? We were. We were talking um just
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: a you know, we're returning to you, Max, uh, from
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: our travels, a brawl to the to the far off
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: land of New York City where Nolan I popped over
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: on the Elvis Durand Show and then we had a
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: you know, Noel, I I thanked you for it, but
• 2:13
  Speaker 1: I want to thank you on air. Noel surprised me. Uh.
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: He said, hey, hey, I've got a surprise. We gotta
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: meet up at the hotel. I've got I've got a
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: gift for you. You're gonna love it. And I was like, okay,
• 2:26
  Speaker 1: what is this? What's what's going on? And then I asked,
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: you know, I said easy to person because we know
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: a lot of people in New York and what do
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: you say? He thought I'd gotten you like a mail
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: order bride or something. Is that what your is it?
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: A is my gift? A person? I thought you were
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: bringing like Uh, I thought you were bringing like our pals,
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: you know, Max Um. Max's extra credit today because he's
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: technically off work and came through because we wanted to
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: want to do some special stuff before we take time
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: off for the holidays. So uh, no, I thought you
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: might be bringing Max over. I thought you might be
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: bringing our Palman gash over. Yeah. You asked if it
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: was a person, to which I was replied sort of.
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: It's a group of people. And that group of people
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: was the Seminal two thousands dance rock band LCD sound System,
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: who were doing a run of shows at the fabulous
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: venue Brooklyn Steel. It was very very much sold out,
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: and I happened upon a couple of tickets on Instagram. Uh,
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: it just happened to be. We were there for literally
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: two nights, and it just happened to be little. The
• 3:32
  Speaker 1: second night we were there, we had no plans, so
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: yeah we got to go see James Murphy and company.
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: Um and Ben and I got there. You know what
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: I hate you guys. Just want to put this out
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: there speaking of stirring beef. I hate it when venues
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: lie about showtimes. Yeah, but this was this was an
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: egregious lie because it's said doors at seven, show it eight.
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: There was no opener listed. So I'm like, yes, we'll
• 3:57
  Speaker 1: be out of there by ten pm, like a couple
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: of old old fellas. And then we talked to the
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: bart and we got in there at you know, seven five,
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: and there was like nobody there. We're like, but this
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: is a sold out show. This makes no sense, and
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: she goes, actually it starts to nah, I'm like, lies.
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: But it did give us the opportunity to post up
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: in the balcony because the place really is just like
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: one mezzanine balcony situation and a giant general admission floor. Um.
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: So we kind of stuck our claim, staked our claim um,
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: and we you know, we had to to defend ourselves
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: at times from people trying to like, you know, get
• 4:31
  Speaker 1: in there. Um. At times I was the defender, at
• 4:33
  Speaker 1: times you were the defender. But we did stand firm uh,
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: and did afford us the opportunity to be right next
• 4:39
  Speaker 1: to the V I P section which remained empty, myously empty.
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: I forgot about this right up until the start of
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: the show, and right when the show is about to start,
• 4:49
  Speaker 1: this very good looking crew of of folks kind of
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: just mosied in and and who would it be but
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: the fabulous director Noah Baumbach, his wife, the fabulous director
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: and actor Greta gerwig Um and the incredible actor Peter
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: Sarskar and his wife, the incredible actor director Maggie Gillenhall.
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: And we just bopped next to them with the same
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: view for the whole show. It was kind of neat
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: and like we were kicking it with the swells. Yeah,
• 5:17
  Speaker 1: they hanging with royalty. As a matter of fact, the only, um,
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: the only downer of that night, which was an amazing night,
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: The only downer was, uh, this guy, the front man, James.
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: He almost called off the whole show because he said,
• 5:30
  Speaker 1: Where's Where's Max Williams? And and we didn't know how
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: to cheer, uh for that, like because you weren't there.
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: And then because they were contractually obligated, they continued the show.
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: But most of it it was about fifty fifty l
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: c D sound system songs and about fifty percent, uh
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: you know, that guy just lamenting that that Max wasn't there.
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: So I'll have to go back, but you're right now
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: it's totally forgotten. Thank you also for explaining to me
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: who these people were, because the whole time I was
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: the whole time I was like, oh, what is it?
• 6:08
  Speaker 1: I think, I asked, I asked Nol. At one point
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: I was like, um, I was, I was too, I
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: was too irolly about it. I said, what do we
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: have to talk to them? And he said, no, man,
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: we don't. I think it's some what you said. Why
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: should I care about these individuals? Yeah, because it turns
• 6:25
  Speaker 1: out Ben really only cares about historical figures who have
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: long since left this mortal coil um and uh, we're
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: talking about that flavor of royalty. But these were genuinely
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: like Brooklyn Royalty. Like I described them to my friends
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: and texts as a real genius cluster because you know,
• 6:43
  Speaker 1: and I we we would deal with a lot of
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: you know, well known luminary types in our line of work.
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: And I don't usually get fanboyed out, but this was like,
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: all of these people are people whose work I have
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: admired for a very long time. The Bound Boch movie
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: The Squid in the Whale is one of my favorite
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: movies and you know, it's cool who have seen Greta
• 7:00
  Speaker 1: Growig and Maggie Jillen has also become incredible directors in
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: their own rights. So it really was kind of neat
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: to see this like mega power couple duo just kind
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: of you know, living in the real world like people do.
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: I'm not like surprised, it was just kind of it
• 7:14
  Speaker 1: was fun, awesome, and you know, they they were having
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: a great time and we are. We are talking about
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: royalty today and in many ways, uh, these folks who
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: were all I agree, you know, they are a genius
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: cluster and I am a big fan of their work.
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: They are kind of modern day royalty. That's what a
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: lot of celebrities are in the United States today. We're
• 7:38
  Speaker 1: talking about historical royalty. And here at the end of
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: the year, we're finally doing an episode that you and
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: Max and I had kicked around for a while until
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: Max pulled the trigger and said, let's let's put some
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: uh you know, let's put some gas in the tank
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: on this. This is part one of what will be
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: a continuing series on Royalty. But wait, we've got to
• 8:03
  Speaker 1: give our little spin to it. This is Royals who
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  Speaker 1: Died in ridiculous ways, and we had a little talk about,
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: you know, the statute of limitations. Every human loss of
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: life is a tragedy. But um, but come on, man,
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: some of these you know, yeah, look, look look at
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: this as kind of like the Royal Darwin Awards. You know,
• 8:25
  Speaker 1: familiar with that. I think it's literally an award that's
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: given out, uh for folks who died in absurd ways.
• 8:33
  Speaker 1: The Darwin Awards described as evolution and action, so you know,
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: we know the evolution is described often a survival of
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: the fittest. Usually people that die absurdly aren't the fittest,
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: and they, you know, evolutionarily speaking, had it coming in
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: a weird way. Um. So that's kind of what we're
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: going for today is a bit of a royalty based
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: Darwin Awards. Yeah, I agree, and shout out to our
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: house over its stuff to blow your mind. They do
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: an annual recap of the Darwin Awards every year. Check
• 9:05
  Speaker 1: it out if you'd like a little bit of schadenfreud
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: with your coffee. Uh, you know, Max, I like something
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: you pointed out without being too fatalistic, our buddy Max said,
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: whether we like it or not, we're all gonna die.
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: You can accept it or not, but that's on you.
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: Kind of kind of some tough love there to open
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: our show today. So, uh, this is this is the
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: thing we're gonna go through in this episode, which might
• 9:31
  Speaker 1: even end up being a two parter. We're gonna look
• 9:33
  Speaker 1: at at least six very strange deaths. First, you know,
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: you you were speaking of our Scandinavian or or Nordic
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: friend who was with us at the LCD sound System show.
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: You like, how I'm already changing the narrative a little
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: like now now, Yeah, Pete was hanging with us, and
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: Pete was like, where the heck is Max? Like, come on, man,
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: just be cool, and uh, he might enjoy this story.
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: He might actually already know this story. It's he might
• 10:03
  Speaker 1: be related to them, might be related to the guy. Yeah,
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: we're talking about sacred Eisenstein Son Steinson, Steinson. Yes, that's
• 10:19
  Speaker 1: a tough one because you want to say Eisenstein because
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: that's somebody who of a historical note. I believe Eisenstein.
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: But yeah, it's E Y S T E I N
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: S S O N. And the subtitle of this one
• 10:34
  Speaker 1: is versus the Decapitated head Um with VP with with
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: a head and lost. I'll bite your ass, you know,
• 10:44
  Speaker 1: if any money Python fans out there in the audience.
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: So this is this is a story of uh well,
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: this is one of saga I guess, the stories of
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: kings of Norway and their conquests. And there are two
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: all encompassing end of you know, saga's, like epic tales
• 11:01
  Speaker 1: that really paint the picture of this period in history.
• 11:05
  Speaker 1: We've got hims Kringla and or or Orcan Orcaninga. And
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: according to the chronicles Um of these of these two stories,
• 11:16
  Speaker 1: the tale of Sigurd starts after the Battle of Hart's Fjord.
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: And again we are not native again, not for the
• 11:24
  Speaker 1: first time we've said it in the past, when I
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: say again, uh visa the any weird pronunciations, We are
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: not native speakers of this language. And there are some
• 11:33
  Speaker 1: real doozy pronunciations here. So we're going to do our
• 11:35
  Speaker 1: best to do our duty to God in our country,
• 11:38
  Speaker 1: to help other people, and to obey the law of pronunciation.
• 11:42
  Speaker 1: And there we go. Now, it was this amazing um spectacle,
• 11:49
  Speaker 1: a maritime spectacle, an epic naval battle, and this went
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: across decades from eight seventy two c. E or a D,
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: whichever you prefer to. Nine hundred CE or a D.
• 12:03
  Speaker 1: This was the for This led to the formation of
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: the Kingdom of Norway, finally unified Norway. And there's this
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: Viking chief. His name is Harold fair Hair, as in
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: like light colored hair, and he um, he's the guy
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: who brings everybody together, all these small kingdoms. He brings
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: them under the banner of a single ruler as yeah,
• 12:28
  Speaker 1: and he says a conqueror unifier. Yes. He says, Hey, everybody,
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: I'm I'm the first king of the Norwegians, and and
• 12:37
  Speaker 1: I need help to uh, I need help to quiet
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: down the dissidents, especially these rogue pirate vikings during this
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: uh this epic battle. And he gets the help of
• 12:50
  Speaker 1: someone named Rognvald roden Wold uh ey Steinson. Hey, al
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: right there, we think he did. Well, what do you
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: what do? What do you do when you've gotta oh
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: with the little slash through it, it kind of looks
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: like a no sign? Is that what? What? How does
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: that affect the pronunciation? Because we've got this fellow Rognwald
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: was of a land called More. But with that with
• 13:14
  Speaker 1: the slash through the oh, we are hopefully we are
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: hopefully being charming in our inability to pronounce this stuff correctly,
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: and we apologize to the good people of Norway. It's
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: it's a great question. Help us out. Let us know. Anyway,
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: here's what you need to know. Harold and rogan Wald Rognvald,
• 13:37
  Speaker 1: they are cooperating to get rid of these rogue elopments,
• 13:42
  Speaker 1: these pirates. And as they're annexing these kingdoms, as they're
• 13:47
  Speaker 1: fighting off these folks who are saying I don't want
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: to be in your Norway thing. I've are the son
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: of rogn Wald is killed, and so the king says,
• 13:59
  Speaker 1: I feel bad. So you know what, I'm gonna seed
• 14:03
  Speaker 1: some land to you. I'm gonna give you these islands,
• 14:06
  Speaker 1: Shetland and Orkney. I'm also going to promote you to nobility.
• 14:11
  Speaker 1: This is a word, by the way, that a lot
• 14:13
  Speaker 1: of folks in the in the United States only learned
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: through the amazing game Skyrim. We're also gonna give you
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: these tiny ponies to breed on your island and uh
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: and make a name for yourself. And and these tiny
• 14:26
  Speaker 1: ponies Shetland and right, don't fact check that, for no
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: one fact check that. But but so he becomes a yarl.
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: Think of it like an earl, right, I think yarl
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: is way more impressive sounding than earl. You know, it's
• 14:41
  Speaker 1: just it's got a yard to it. You know, it's
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: got a real it's got some real zip Ben, Who
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: is your favorite yarl? Oh? Uh, I don't like a
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: lot of them. I'm gonna, I'm gonna. I think they
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: are meant to be uh cautionary tales about the danger
• 15:01
  Speaker 1: of power. A guy in white runs. Okay, that's fine,
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: but I mean if you side with what the imperially
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: said with the uh with the storm folks, yes, oh
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: fre scited looking at him. It's been a long time saying. Then.
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: I think I've mentioned that I got to a place
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: where I I transported myself to the land of the
• 15:23
  Speaker 1: dragons and before I had any business doing so. And
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: then my previous save was hours and hours in the past.
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: I was like, you know what, I gotta put a
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: pen in this one I never actually finished. Is not
• 15:35
  Speaker 1: fun if you're not ready to fight all the w Well,
• 15:39
  Speaker 1: that's all true, and I want to go back to
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: an earlier point. I think maybe we're less impressed with
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: earl because I don't know about you. I know, like
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: three guys named Earl and they're just regular dudes. They're awesome.
• 15:52
  Speaker 1: There's if you're listening to that show all the Best. Yeah,
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: my name name is which is just like kind of
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: an everyman dim Win, you know, sort of hapless Fellows.
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: So yeah, Earl. We also have our local venue, the
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: Earl East Atlanta Restaurant and Lounge. So I think our
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: our our understanding of Earl is has been a little
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: bit more modernized, whereas yar all just kind of has
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: some gravitas attached to it, you know. Yeah, and this
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: gravitas is even more magnified back here in in you know,
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: these first few centuries a d this is why. Okay,
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: So the guy owns the Islands Road World and he's
• 16:29
  Speaker 1: got the fair Hair's permission to transfer his power. So
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: he says, thank you very much for um, you know,
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: thank you very much for recognizing my grief and the
• 16:43
  Speaker 1: death of my child. I would like to give this
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: power and this yar Old ship to my brother. Cigarette.
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: Uh and cigarette is what's called a forecastle, man? Are you?
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: Are you guys familiar with forecastle? I'm guessing it's a
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: autical term because usually if there's a esoteric word that
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: I don't know that comes from these kinds of historical tales.
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: It has to do with chips. The forecastle is the
• 17:12
  Speaker 1: upper deck of a sailing ship. So yeah, so this
• 17:16
  Speaker 1: is it's the four or I guess back then it
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: would be the part of a ship where the sailors
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: would have living quarters. Anyway, he's a big deal, right,
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: And so Sigurd says, all right, thank you, bro, literally
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: my brother, and I'm gonna hang out with my buddy
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: Thorstein the Red, and we're going to start amassing more land. Right,
• 17:42
  Speaker 1: let's expand the brand, they say, just like mac and
• 17:45
  Speaker 1: always sunny. Uh. And they start start conquering pieces of
• 17:50
  Speaker 1: modern day northern Scotland. Uh. And this guy, sigured, he
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: starts getting some street names like the Mighty the Mighty.
• 17:58
  Speaker 1: You know, it's funny I mentioned earlier, like you know,
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: I think I said unifier and you said conqueror sort
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: of like it depends on who's telling the story, right,
• 18:05
  Speaker 1: one person's unifier as another person's brutal conqueror. So the
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: idea of a lot of these historical tales of um
• 18:13
  Speaker 1: founding new lands involved raping and pillaging existing ones but
• 18:18
  Speaker 1: then in the telling you kind of if it favors
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: the winners, obviously the victors. So you end up hearing
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: about people with names like the mighty as opposed to
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: the bloodthirsty or the rapacious. And in the process of
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: this conquering this expansion, Sigurd challenges the native king, the
• 18:41
  Speaker 1: native ruler. His name is King male Brick b r
• 18:47
  Speaker 1: I g t E. And they are going to have
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: a battle for the ownership or dominion over the kingdom
• 18:55
  Speaker 1: of Mori. Not to be confused with Mari Povich. Uh.
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: This this guy, this guy has more. They hit each
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: other with chairs. That's well, that's one of that type
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: of show, right right, Well the picture forty men doing that,
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: but without without chairs. You know, they're they're using spears
• 19:11
  Speaker 1: and they're they're killing each other right with no ad breaks.
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: And so we mentioned earlier house Cigurd has his his nickname,
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: which is the Mighty or an old Norse that would
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: be Ricky, which was much more intimidating back then. Uh,
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: this guy has a nickname to mile. He does, and
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: that's an unfortunate nickname. As nicknames go, usually sometimes it
• 19:34
  Speaker 1: involves an act that you've done that's impressive, and then
• 19:37
  Speaker 1: people feel that you're in a nickname like the mighty
• 19:39
  Speaker 1: or the conqueror, or or the bloodthirsty as as I
• 19:42
  Speaker 1: mentioned before, or you know, the impaler perhaps. Uh, this
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: guy's nickname just kind of came from the cut of
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: his jib, which was a little buck toothed, his jim cut. Um,
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: So he was known as the buck tooth. Yeah, mild
• 19:57
  Speaker 1: the buck tooth, quelling fear for right saw the horizon,
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: the buck tooth. Indeed, he had a bit of a
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: Stephen King thing going, oh boy, yeah, and uh, the
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: the idea here was that forty men from Sigurd side
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: and forty men from the buck tooth side. Um, we're
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: gonna fight it out to the death and and see
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: who remained. Yeah, yeah, and I'm glad you point that out.
• 20:23
  Speaker 1: It's forty people from each side. So this is really
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: an eighty person deadly MORI battle situation. More than like
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: a war, you know what I mean. It's really more
• 20:33
  Speaker 1: like a contest, you know what I mean, Because forty
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: on forty it really is kind of like a like
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: a really intense brawl. It gets even weirder because old
• 20:45
  Speaker 1: Sigurd is practicing what we were call real politic, right,
• 20:49
  Speaker 1: and he's saying, hey, this isn't boxing rules, this is
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: to the death. And I assume old buck Tooth is
• 20:56
  Speaker 1: gonna fight dirty. So instead of the agreed on forty
• 21:01
  Speaker 1: ben on horseback, he double saddles them, right, so there
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: are two guys on every hoard, and this brings his
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: side up to eighty people. And then the that brings
• 21:13
  Speaker 1: the entire battle royale here to a hundred and twenty dudes.
• 21:16
  Speaker 1: So things are already out of hand. Oh yeah, clearly
• 21:19
  Speaker 1: favoring sigurd side because he is being as the trailer
• 21:22
  Speaker 1: park boys would say, greasy, greasy and old old buck tooth.
• 21:29
  Speaker 1: And again there's a reason we're leaning on this. Old
• 21:32
  Speaker 1: buck Tooth is a competent commander, but he is simply outmatched,
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: and as you point out, and it does not go
• 21:41
  Speaker 1: well for him. He dies and his forces are overwhelmed.
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: Sigurd decapitates him, so yeah, removes his head and and
• 21:50
  Speaker 1: he is Sigurd is riding high off the off the
• 21:54
  Speaker 1: bloody victory, right, and he he says, Okay, I'm gonna
• 21:58
  Speaker 1: let everybody know I am proud of the horror in
• 22:03
  Speaker 1: the havoc. I have sown today. Yes, yeah, look upon
• 22:08
  Speaker 1: me wh my works you might indeed, and you say
• 22:11
  Speaker 1: he was riding high off of his victory. I would
• 22:14
  Speaker 1: imagine this was the day of people kind of drinking
• 22:17
  Speaker 1: meat and stuff instead of water. So he's probably riding
• 22:20
  Speaker 1: nile and some other stuff too, um, and was a
• 22:23
  Speaker 1: little bit maybe numbed to the fact that this decapitated
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: head that he then tied onto his horse was kind
• 22:30
  Speaker 1: of banging against his bare leg um during his his travels,
• 22:35
  Speaker 1: you know, his his sort of victory lap, right, And
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: lest we not forget that the nickname and the associated uh,
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: the associated feature of this severed head, giant buck teeth
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: that were right there against the dude's bare leg because
• 22:52
  Speaker 1: I guess he was wearing some kind of some kind
• 22:55
  Speaker 1: of kilts, you know, or at the very least like
• 22:58
  Speaker 1: you know, I mean, yeah, I don't know exactly, but
• 23:01
  Speaker 1: he definitely had his legs exposed. Um. And so, for
• 23:05
  Speaker 1: whatever reason, be the cold, be it the power, mad,
• 23:09
  Speaker 1: blood lust, drunkenness, or the actual drunkenness, he was not
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: paying very close attention to the fact that this thing
• 23:15
  Speaker 1: was grinding on him, not in a not in a
• 23:19
  Speaker 1: fetching way, but in like a way that was, you know,
• 23:22
  Speaker 1: causing him a slow injury. Yeah, And there might be
• 23:27
  Speaker 1: a bit of myth making here because this this happens
• 23:30
  Speaker 1: so long ago. It's quite possible that old Sigurd got
• 23:35
  Speaker 1: another wound that resulted in an infection. But the way
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: the story goes, Bucktooth had his revenge because the scratching
• 23:45
  Speaker 1: of his protruding teeth against his murderer's leg caused a
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: deep infection. The infection worsened quickly, Sigurd gets a fever
• 23:56
  Speaker 1: for several days, He's on death's door and then he dies.
• 24:02
  Speaker 1: How metal is that someone cuts off your head and
• 24:05
  Speaker 1: you end them from the grave. Also a ridiculous way
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: to die. And this is this is just one example.
• 24:15
  Speaker 1: We have another one that is I think less a
• 24:18
  Speaker 1: wartime death and more kind of a a hazard of
• 24:23
  Speaker 1: living the high life. This is the story of a
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: Swedish king named Adolph Frederick, no relation to our pal
• 24:31
  Speaker 1: map or maybe I don't know, I haven't asked him. Yes, indeed,
• 24:41
  Speaker 1: Old Adolph Frederick who ruled from seventeen fifty one to
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: seventeen seventy one during a you know, kind of some
• 24:51
  Speaker 1: glory days there in Sweden none as the Age of liberty,
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: a time when um Swedish people got a lot of
• 24:59
  Speaker 1: important rights, civil rights, there was a lot of of
• 25:04
  Speaker 1: peace time. Uh, and it was it was essentially like
• 25:07
  Speaker 1: a very very you know, solid lovely time to be
• 25:10
  Speaker 1: alive and that part of the world. In seventeen sixty six,
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: the Swedish Parliament also passed legislation supporting things like freedom
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: of the press and freedom of information. I don't know,
• 25:21
  Speaker 1: maybe I'm just not educated in this, you know, in
• 25:23
  Speaker 1: the politics of this part of the world, but that's
• 25:25
  Speaker 1: surprising to me for for that stuff to be established,
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: you know that early in Europe under kind of a
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: a monarchy, you know, which you think of typically as
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: being a bit you know, overbearing and controlling when it
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: comes to these kinds of things. Yeah, the Age of liberty.
• 25:42
  Speaker 1: This is a very interesting time in Sweden because this
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: is also part of a big part of Finnish history.
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: There's a move towards parliamentary governments right as opposed to
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: an absolute monarchy. It's still not it's still very much
• 26:00
  Speaker 1: not what you would think of when you think of
• 26:02
  Speaker 1: democracy today. But this is a time of great progress.
• 26:06
  Speaker 1: As you said, Noel and the weird thing is that
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: all it takes in history is one little mishap. And
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: that's the headline, you know what I mean, that's the
• 26:20
  Speaker 1: title of the paper, that's the footnote. Here's the headline
• 26:23
  Speaker 1: for Swedish King Adolph Frederick. Do you think about all
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: the cool stuff he may have done for his people,
• 26:30
  Speaker 1: for his constituency. Now you remember how he died because
• 26:35
  Speaker 1: he ate himself to death on February twelfth, seventeen seventy one,
• 26:40
  Speaker 1: just a few years before the foundation of the United States.
• 26:46
  Speaker 1: At Off is celebrating a holiday. It's called Shrove Tuesday.
• 26:50
  Speaker 1: Shrove Tuesday is kind of like the pregame for Lentz.
• 26:54
  Speaker 1: And during Lentz, you know, people forego certain things. Right,
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: You still see it around today. What are you giving
• 27:01
  Speaker 1: up for lens? Right? And the smart Alec answer is
• 27:04
  Speaker 1: I'm giving up lent for lent Right? Is is shrove
• 27:09
  Speaker 1: a derivation or a related to the word shriven? We
• 27:12
  Speaker 1: always say when when when we're asking if we've done
• 27:15
  Speaker 1: our our our homework, if we've been good boys, and
• 27:17
  Speaker 1: we ask if we're shriven? Uh, you know what? That
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: makes sense to me? It's a traditional feast day right
• 27:23
  Speaker 1: before Lent. So okay, here we go an English Heritage
• 27:27
  Speaker 1: dot org dot UK. The word shrove comes from the
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: Old Roman Catholic practice of being shriven, meaning to confess
• 27:33
  Speaker 1: one sends to unburden oneself. So I think we're using
• 27:37
  Speaker 1: the term correctly. And Shrove Tuesday is the day where
• 27:40
  Speaker 1: you kind of have a grand hurrah. It's the pre game. Yeah, yeah, exactly.
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: And you know that there are, uh, there are certain
• 27:49
  Speaker 1: delicacies associated with it, like pancakes and and lots of
• 27:53
  Speaker 1: sweetie treaties, you know. And you so the idea is
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: you're gonna get on the straight and narrow during Lent, right,
• 28:02
  Speaker 1: do your duty as as you said at the top,
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: for God in your country. And so why not loosen
• 28:08
  Speaker 1: up a little before? You have to be a good kid, right,
• 28:11
  Speaker 1: you know what I mean? Party on Saturday, go to
• 28:14
  Speaker 1: church on Sunday, benge and purge just so, which is
• 28:18
  Speaker 1: not a healthy idea of folks. But and you'll see
• 28:22
  Speaker 1: why in just a second. So our pal Adolph, he says,
• 28:25
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna ball out, you know what I mean. I'm
• 28:28
  Speaker 1: the king, We've been making a lot of progress. I'm
• 28:31
  Speaker 1: gonna give myself an ad of boy. Uh. So I'm
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: gonna he's going to you know, the royal chefs and
• 28:37
  Speaker 1: the cookeries and so on, and he says, you know it,
• 28:40
  Speaker 1: give me the lobster, oh and the caviart, Oh and
• 28:42
  Speaker 1: the kippers. Put some sauerkraut with that. Um, boil that meat,
• 28:46
  Speaker 1: you know what I mean. I'll take some turnips. You know.
• 28:50
  Speaker 1: It's it's like that thing where you show up wells
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: the notable delicacy turns and boil it all. Yeah, that's
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: the best way to cook at me. Let's make it
• 29:04
  Speaker 1: into a slop. Put it in a bucket. Yeah. So
• 29:09
  Speaker 1: he was a competitive eater, but he was only competing
• 29:12
  Speaker 1: against himself. History historians rather imagine that our pal King
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: Frederick was probably used to this was used to an
• 29:22
  Speaker 1: excess of eating. Uh And by the way, the whole
• 29:25
  Speaker 1: time he's eating, he's guzzling champagne. And then he decided
• 29:31
  Speaker 1: to have some dessert, because when are we going to
• 29:33
  Speaker 1: be here again? It's gonna make a just a note here.
• 29:36
  Speaker 1: This might be wrong, but I'm gonna say anyways, I'm
• 29:39
  Speaker 1: just envisioning he's naked while doing all this too. Oh,
• 29:42
  Speaker 1: I hope. So, oh why not, man, here's your imagination.
• 29:44
  Speaker 1: Let it go crazy. I'll tell you what I'm envisioning.
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: Is another Monty Python reference. From the Meaning of Life.
• 29:50
  Speaker 1: There's a character named Mr Creosote, who is this absurdly
• 29:54
  Speaker 1: cartoonishly large man who's eating at a fine French restaurant
• 29:58
  Speaker 1: and just you know, gorging himself. It's real gross out humor.
• 30:01
  Speaker 1: He vomits a lot, and then he asks the uh,
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: he asks the maitre D to bring him a bucket
• 30:08
  Speaker 1: in which he gorges himself and then vomits into the bucket.
• 30:10
  Speaker 1: And then at the end he's like, you know, he's
• 30:13
  Speaker 1: he's covered in in puke. Everyone is completely disgusted, but
• 30:16
  Speaker 1: he's obviously very very wealthy, and so no one's really
• 30:18
  Speaker 1: saying anything. And the maitre D says, could I interest
• 30:21
  Speaker 1: you in welfire thin delicacy for you, you know, for
• 30:27
  Speaker 1: your after dinner to treat And he goes another thing
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: and then he goes but uh, it's a wafer thin
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: and then he takes it with like some tongs and
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: he puts it in his mouth and then he runs
• 30:40
  Speaker 1: and ducks and covers behind some tables like like an army,
• 30:44
  Speaker 1: you know, trench and then the guy explodes. Yeah, makes sense. Uh,
• 30:49
  Speaker 1: you know the feather on the camel's back. Um, Frederick's
• 30:52
  Speaker 1: got one of these two because he cannot finished this meal.
• 30:56
  Speaker 1: He cannot properly celebrate Shrove Tuesday fee if he does
• 31:01
  Speaker 1: not and did with a traditional Shrove Tuesday dessert, the
• 31:06
  Speaker 1: humble simila. It's a bun, it's made from flower. It's
• 31:10
  Speaker 1: been around since fifty one. People have been eating this
• 31:15
  Speaker 1: every Shrove Tuesday. Anyone who's anyone in Sweden, any member
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: of the aristocracy or the literary class, they gotta have
• 31:23
  Speaker 1: their simulas. And uh, this guy's got a sweet tooth, right,
• 31:27
  Speaker 1: even if he isn't a completely sweet band himself, the
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: way to his heart is through a seml up and
• 31:33
  Speaker 1: he eats a ton of them. He eats fourteen and
• 31:38
  Speaker 1: one goes. So if you are familiar with the with
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: the Swedish practice of consuming this traditional dessert, you'll you'll
• 31:47
  Speaker 1: find it reasonable that a majority of Swedish people who
• 31:52
  Speaker 1: practice eat between four and five similars between New Year
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: and Lent. So this guy goes for fourteen one go
• 31:59
  Speaker 1: and and they are each served to him, not playing,
• 32:04
  Speaker 1: but get this in a bowl of hot milk with
• 32:07
  Speaker 1: cinnamon and raisins. Why hot milk? I mean by by
• 32:13
  Speaker 1: like I could see try one for the experience, you
• 32:15
  Speaker 1: know when in Rome, but you would think by like
• 32:18
  Speaker 1: number six, you would say, hey, hold off on the
• 32:21
  Speaker 1: hot milk. This is like the most decadent cereal situation
• 32:25
  Speaker 1: that I've ever heard of. Like you know, you've got
• 32:27
  Speaker 1: your like honeycomb cereal, Like you know, cereals sort of
• 32:30
  Speaker 1: are tiny representations of typically larger confections like cookie crisp,
• 32:35
  Speaker 1: you know, or like you know, little little cinnamon buns,
• 32:38
  Speaker 1: but they're tiny. This guy's eating full sized ones in
• 32:41
  Speaker 1: like a trough of milk with weird raisins. Leave the
• 32:44
  Speaker 1: raisins out for the raisins or grapes that didn't make it.
• 32:47
  Speaker 1: I've said it before. I will die on that hill
• 32:50
  Speaker 1: with you, Ben, Uh, yeah, I really will. But a
• 32:52
  Speaker 1: lot of people really like raisins, so you know, teach
• 32:54
  Speaker 1: their more reasons for you, folks, more reasons indeed for
• 32:58
  Speaker 1: you those extra scoops. Can you can have a so yeah,
• 33:02
  Speaker 1: he he did finally decide to stop eating. He did
• 33:06
  Speaker 1: finally do that, but it was it was kind of
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: too late. The damage had been done. That's the very
• 33:12
  Speaker 1: same day he died of digestive problems trapped wind. Perhaps
• 33:21
  Speaker 1: I don't know, he didn't explode like Mr Creusot, which
• 33:26
  Speaker 1: would have been, you know, a cartoonish ending to a
• 33:29
  Speaker 1: seemingly great man. Now let's let's not let's not let's
• 33:32
  Speaker 1: talk completely, you know, throw this guy to the bus
• 33:34
  Speaker 1: for his vices, you know he did. I don't. I
• 33:36
  Speaker 1: don't know his politics exactly. It could have been like
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: a situation where things were just going well and he
• 33:41
  Speaker 1: got to take credit for it. Maybe it was more
• 33:44
  Speaker 1: to the credit of you know, other lawmakers and politicians,
• 33:47
  Speaker 1: but you know, the the king gets the credit. So
• 33:49
  Speaker 1: I mean, it was this golden time. But it seemingly
• 33:53
  Speaker 1: this guy had some real problems with self control that
• 33:56
  Speaker 1: ultimately led to his untimely. Darwin asked of mis Yeah,
• 34:01
  Speaker 1: he had a lot of stress, and unfortunately, because he
• 34:05
  Speaker 1: dies before you know, he his preparation for lent prevented
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: him from celebrating length that year. But his death also
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: has some far reaching social consequences because despite the fact
• 34:19
  Speaker 1: that there's a parliament, there's still a monarchy, which means
• 34:22
  Speaker 1: that regardless of how unqualified your air might be, they
• 34:28
  Speaker 1: still get the catbird seat. So when Frederick dies, When
• 34:32
  Speaker 1: Adolf Frederick dies, his son Gustav the third gets the throne.
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: And Gustav, not as much of a nice guy, he
• 34:41
  Speaker 1: ends the age of liberty. He in states a dictatorship.
• 34:45
  Speaker 1: He says, he says that freedom of the presses for
• 34:48
  Speaker 1: the birds passed me. Another sembla kill the journalists, and uh,
• 34:53
  Speaker 1: let's start a war with Russia. And he lost. So
• 34:56
  Speaker 1: you could also argue that Adolf frederick vices were not
• 35:01
  Speaker 1: only his undoing, with the undoing of the country. Just
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: so it's a bummer man, because you know, again, this
• 35:08
  Speaker 1: was a really glorious and kind of equitable time, a
• 35:11
  Speaker 1: time before that was nearly as much of a thing
• 35:14
  Speaker 1: as the rights and liberties that we take for granted
• 35:16
  Speaker 1: here in the United States. However waning they might be,
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: um but literally it was a bowl of milk and
• 35:24
  Speaker 1: raisins and sweetie buns that completely unravels a democracy. And uh,
• 35:31
  Speaker 1: speaking of endings, shout out to the watchman line from
• 35:35
  Speaker 1: Dr Manhattan, nothing ever ends. Uh, we are going to
• 35:40
  Speaker 1: call it a day on these on these royal deaths
• 35:44
  Speaker 1: now we have we have at least six. We only
• 35:46
  Speaker 1: got to two because we're having such a time exploring these,
• 35:50
  Speaker 1: and we hope that you tune in later this week
• 35:54
  Speaker 1: when we have more tails. We're gonna talk about a
• 35:58
  Speaker 1: keen dog a monkey. We're gonna go out with a bang.
• 36:02
  Speaker 1: We're gonna sound like a set up for a joke
• 36:05
  Speaker 1: setting a dog and a monkey. You walk into a
• 36:07
  Speaker 1: palace and and we're going to get to um one
• 36:11
  Speaker 1: of uh, one of my favorites, also in ancient China.
• 36:15
  Speaker 1: We're gonna skip around in time, and we hope you
• 36:18
  Speaker 1: join us. Folks Man, this is I gotta say. I
• 36:24
  Speaker 1: you know, a lot of a lot of shows are
• 36:26
  Speaker 1: are kicking their legs up for the holidays, but this,
• 36:29
  Speaker 1: this show is always so much fun, uh, and I'm
• 36:32
  Speaker 1: so glad to do it here. Yeah. It is a
• 36:35
  Speaker 1: natural two partner. And it also you know, it helps
• 36:37
  Speaker 1: us out because I think we'll probably publish a couple
• 36:40
  Speaker 1: of classics for the thick of the holidays. We wanted
• 36:43
  Speaker 1: to give you some meaty historical ridiculousness to sink your
• 36:47
  Speaker 1: teeth into, to have you know, during your time off,
• 36:50
  Speaker 1: and we really appreciate you all, every single one of
• 36:53
  Speaker 1: your ridiculous historians out there, and um we hope you
• 36:55
  Speaker 1: enjoy Part two coming at you very soon. Except for Kevin,
• 36:59
  Speaker 1: you know what you did, you do, you know what
• 37:01
  Speaker 1: you did a good person. You really insist on yourself.
• 37:05
  Speaker 1: He you know, he pushes people. So anyway, yes, thank
• 37:09
  Speaker 1: you of course, to our super producer Mr Max Williams.
• 37:13
  Speaker 1: To our research associate Mr Max Williams. Thanks to our
• 37:18
  Speaker 1: good friends and fearsome foes the world around looking at you.
• 37:23
  Speaker 1: Jonathan Strickland Ak the Quister. When is he gonna be back?
• 37:26
  Speaker 1: I keep thinking we're gonna see him darkening our doorstep,
• 37:29
  Speaker 1: but then he gives us another reprieve. Yeah. Yeah, Plus
• 37:33
  Speaker 1: we always tell him that we're going to record on
• 37:35
  Speaker 1: Fridays at four and between the between the three of us,
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: you know, by the time we get the Fridays for uh,
• 37:43
  Speaker 1: it's it could be it could be tough. You know what.
• 37:45
  Speaker 1: We should just text you know what, we should just
• 37:47
  Speaker 1: go to his house and record live. He'll be fine
• 37:50
  Speaker 1: with that, right, I think, so I got so we
• 37:53
  Speaker 1: can get it an easy. That's a l tied surprise.
• 37:57
  Speaker 1: Thank you so much. We're gonna go out with our
• 37:58
  Speaker 1: classic outro line, We'll see you next time, folks. For
• 38:09
  Speaker 1: more podcasts from my Heart Radio, visit the I heart
• 38:11
  Speaker 1: Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you listen to your
• 38:14
  Speaker 1: favorite shows.