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What Habits Are You Creating? · Effective Communication

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  Speaker 1: And now, Effective Communication with Phil Zeller, CEO, Dale Carnegie,
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  Speaker 1: Southwest Michigan. Isn't it awesome when our kids grow up
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  Speaker 1: and they become even more interesting? So there I was
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  Speaker 1: just the other day. I was talking to my daughter.
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  Speaker 1: She's an adult now. And we had a fantastic conversation.
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  Speaker 1: As we're getting engaged in this conversation, we're talking about...
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  Speaker 1: how she feels, how she feels about what's going on
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  Speaker 1: in her generation in the world. And she's sharing with
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  Speaker 1: me the struggles that her generation is having and as
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  Speaker 1: she perceives it. And interestingly enough, if you've had these
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  Speaker 1: conversations with family members, especially ones of different generations, it's
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  Speaker 1: as if the struggle is new. It's as if the
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  Speaker 1: struggle is brand new to that generation, as if no
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  Speaker 1: generation before had struggled. And the reality is you and
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  Speaker 1: I both know that the struggle's always been there. It
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  Speaker 1: just comes in a different version of the struggle. And
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  Speaker 1: every generation struggles. You and I have been through struggles.
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  Speaker 1: And as I'm listening to her talk, she was talking
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  Speaker 1: about the challenges right now with her younger generation. Generation
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  Speaker 1: Z is what she's part of. And this really led
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  Speaker 1: to a discussion about of where do the thoughts come from?
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  Speaker 1: Where do the thoughts that we believe, our beliefs, where
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  Speaker 1: do they come from? So you can only imagine where
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  Speaker 1: this conversation went. Yes, it got pretty dang deep pretty quick.
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  Speaker 1: As it always does here on Effective Communication with Phil Zeller, right?
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  Speaker 1: What can we do? But we always make it simplistic.
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  Speaker 1: Simplistic to this is what we can do to change
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  Speaker 1: a situation where and where to make it better. And
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  Speaker 1: as I'm talking with her, she's sharing with me that
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  Speaker 1: it comes from her personal experiences in life, what she's
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  Speaker 1: been through. And it also comes from the influence of
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  Speaker 1: social media and the people she hangs out with. And
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  Speaker 1: so we started talking about where does all this insight
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  Speaker 1: come from? And it's always interesting when you talk to
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  Speaker 1: somebody and you hear them share their experiences because you
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  Speaker 1: start to see and feel and hear, why do they
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  Speaker 1: think this way? And as she shared with me, I
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  Speaker 1: started asking questions for deep understanding. And as we know,
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  Speaker 1: when you're asking those questions, you have better insight to
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  Speaker 1: where they're coming from. And then as we talked about it,
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  Speaker 1: the conversation shifted. And it shifted to something that you've
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  Speaker 1: probably shifted before as well. And it shifted to learn behavior.
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  Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, learn behavior. What have we learned? What
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  Speaker 1: have you learned? What have I learned? And where did
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  Speaker 1: we learn that from. So as we started breaking it down,
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  Speaker 1: we had a little conversation, sidebar conversation about Pavlov and
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  Speaker 1: the dogs and classical conditioning and the world of psychology
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  Speaker 1: and talking about learned behavior. And then we started talking
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  Speaker 1: about other learned behaviors. We started talking about non-inheritable learned behavior.
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  Speaker 1: We started talking about adaptable behavior, intrinsic behavior, progressive behavior. behavior,
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  Speaker 1: all different forms of learned behavior. And it started breaking
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  Speaker 1: this down. And if people are, I think there's a
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  Speaker 1: guy sitting there like, what is this guy and his
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  Speaker 1: daughter talking about? This is crazy. This is wild. But
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  Speaker 1: these are conversations that I really enjoy sharing with you
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  Speaker 1: because these are real life. These are things we're thinking.
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  Speaker 1: And when we can articulate them with somebody else, we
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  Speaker 1: can glean that insight. Dale Carnegie found, Dale Carnegie found
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  Speaker 1: that our thoughts make us who we are. So think
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  Speaker 1: about what we are. Our thoughts make us that. So
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  Speaker 1: as my daughter and I were talking about the learned
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  Speaker 1: behavior and the things that we've learned, we started asking ourselves,
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  Speaker 1: where do these thoughts come from? So my question for
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  Speaker 1: you today is to ask this question of yourself. What
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  Speaker 1: thoughts are you thinking today? What's going through your brain?
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  Speaker 1: Where did you learn that from? Who shared that with you?
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  Speaker 1: Why is that? And question it. And the reason you
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  Speaker 1: question it, because you've got to ask yourself, are those
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  Speaker 1: thoughts positive? And do they lead to a positive outcome?
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  Speaker 1: Because realistically, a lot of people are struggling with anxiety, depression, frustration,
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  Speaker 1: thinking it's more difficult now than ever before. But is
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  Speaker 1: it really? Is it really? Because the other generations used
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  Speaker 1: to think that too. Even my generation thought that when
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  Speaker 1: we were young. So your challenge is to make a
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  Speaker 1: commitment to yourself today, and it starts with a little step,
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  Speaker 1: talking about learned behavior. What's one little thing that you
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  Speaker 1: can think of today that you could do to make
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  Speaker 1: your life more positive? And when you do that today,
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  Speaker 1: commit to yourself you're going to make that little positive
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  Speaker 1: change today, and then do it with intention. And then
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  Speaker 1: after you've done it, appreciate yourself for making that one
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  Speaker 1: little change today. And if you keep stringing those changes together,
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  Speaker 1: those positive little things you do each day, over time,
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  Speaker 1: you'll change your thoughts. You'll change your mind. You'll change
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  Speaker 1: your behavior. And you'll better prepare yourself to deal with
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  Speaker 1: the challenges of your generation, of your life today, and
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  Speaker 1: you will be successful. Now go make it happen.