Latest / Clydesdale Media Podcast / Lunch with the Clydesdale & Cowboy - A Gas Leak to Delay the Show! BAM!!!

Transcript

Lunch with the Clydesdale & Cowboy - A Gas Leak to Delay the Show! BAM!!! · Clydesdale Media Podcast

0:03
Well, it has been a wild morning.
0:10
We're good.
0:11
Next.
0:30
From the gym to the screen, yeah,
0:32
we cover it all.
0:33
Midday motivation every time you press
0:35
ball.
0:35
Lunch with the Clydesdale.
0:38
Cowboy bring the heat.
0:40
CrossFit, boobies, music on repeat.
0:44
Half hour hustle, yeah,
0:45
we building that brand.
0:46
Grab a plate, tune in now,
0:48
you part of the fam.
0:53
It's late lunch time.
0:57
I mean, we're not that late.
0:59
Four minutes, come on.
1:01
I know.
1:01
That's like,
1:02
that's kind of like my calling card.
1:03
We're never late.
1:05
Like, right.
1:06
You know,
1:06
there's a lot of people in this media
1:08
world that they get there when they get
1:11
there.
1:12
The on the start time is optional.
1:15
Yeah, they get there when they get there.
1:18
Oh, to be fair.
1:21
You had a legitimate excuse.
1:24
Yep.
1:25
So for people that weren't on my text
1:28
string with Vicki and Corey,
1:34
I'm sitting there working this morning,
1:37
fighting with a group of people that are
1:40
outside my agency,
1:42
who I created a website for.
1:44
And all of a sudden my lawn man
1:47
knocks on the door and he's like, oops.
1:52
That's one way to put it.
1:53
I, uh,
1:55
i hit your gas meter and it moved
1:59
and i then i heard i smelled gas
2:01
so i tried to move it back and
2:03
the pipe snapped jesus christ what do you
2:08
do with a truck like it was one
2:11
of those riding zero turn big ass mowers
2:16
and uh
2:18
And so I called the gas company,
2:21
and they're like, so can you smell gas?
2:26
And I said, well,
2:27
I lost my sense of smell during COVID,
2:30
so I don't know if it smells or
2:32
not.
2:32
I can't tell.
2:36
I swear I would tell you if I
2:37
could.
2:38
I said,
2:39
but the pipe is hanging off the side.
2:43
And their next question is,
2:44
do you hear a hissing?
2:49
The pipe is hanging off the side.
2:51
I don't know what more you need.
2:52
Gas is pressurized through that line and
2:56
is now no longer going into my house,
2:58
but escaping into the air outside.
3:01
It's clearly venting into the atmosphere.
3:03
Why?
3:04
Because it's broken off the side of my
3:06
house.
3:07
Let's go with that.
3:12
So finally she goes,
3:13
so I guess we can assume it smells.
3:15
Yeah, let's assume.
3:16
You know what?
3:17
Yeah, sure.
3:19
Sure.
3:19
I'm with you.
3:20
Let's just assume.
3:21
Why not?
3:22
So then like after back and forth for
3:25
all of this bullshit question and answer,
3:30
she says, well, I need to tell you,
3:31
you should probably evacuate the home.
3:34
wow so you kept me on the line
3:36
i'm on a cell phone i could have
3:38
walked away and we still could have had
3:40
this conversation i like probably probably
3:44
a lot of fun you should probably evacuate
3:48
your house what do you mean probably and
3:50
then they're like well and we recommend
3:52
you don't light a cigarette or use any
3:54
electrical devices near the leak
3:59
well you tell them good thing you quit
4:00
smoking i picked a hell of a day
4:02
to stop smoking including home alarms um
4:07
garage doors uh i don't know they listed
4:11
yeah anything i stopped listening after
4:15
they kept me on the line for ten
4:17
minutes and then told me to get out
4:18
of the house that's my favorite part you
4:22
smell gas
4:24
I can't smell anything.
4:25
I haven't since twenty twenty.
4:26
Sorry.
4:27
Kind of a thing.
4:28
Joseph Ramirez thought I used my flux
4:30
capacitor and went back to a time where
4:32
house phones were a thing.
4:39
Was the sound that Scott's phone was not
4:40
making while he was calling up the gas
4:44
company.
4:44
Yeah.
4:45
Tesla's got a point.
4:46
Don't use the flamethrower.
4:47
Yeah.
4:49
Elon Musk, boring company, flamethrower.
4:53
I sent my wife to check,
4:54
and she is now laying in the yard,
4:56
so maybe.
4:56
Right.
4:58
She's kind of twitching a little bit.
5:00
Is that bad?
5:01
I don't know what to do, honestly.
5:07
When she asked who was hissing,
5:08
I went outside and turned the corner to
5:11
see if I heard it.
5:13
And I said, well, I'm out here,
5:14
and I don't hear it because I think
5:16
the lawn guy shut off.
5:18
the the the gas at the base yeah
5:22
and she goes you went outside close to
5:24
it i'm like well you asked me if
5:26
it was hissing she goes get away from
5:30
it get away from it lady is this
5:33
your first day on the phone like i'm
5:35
gonna need you to good night dude i
5:39
was on my house phone with the twenty
5:41
foot cord yeah around the side of the
5:43
house somebody beeped in on call waiting
5:46
while i was on the phone with these
5:47
people
5:49
Jeez, man.
5:51
Yeah.
5:53
Yeah.
5:54
Larry's got a point.
5:56
Do you hear hissing?
5:57
What?
5:57
Really?
5:58
Is that what we're asking right now if
5:59
I'm hearing hissing?
6:01
I don't know what part you missed.
6:04
It's hanging off the side of my house.
6:07
Yeah.
6:08
What else do you need to know at
6:10
that point?
6:11
I don't feel like there's anything.
6:12
We don't need to go any further than
6:13
that.
6:15
But once the crew came,
6:20
and it was a no-nonsense gas dude.
6:22
Like, he didn't want any conversation.
6:25
He just wanted pointed in the direction of
6:27
the shit.
6:28
I'll kind of do it right there.
6:29
Right.
6:31
He lit the pilot light, said, you're set.
6:35
I had to put air in the line
6:36
to push everything through.
6:38
And then I lit your pilot light so
6:40
it would ignite.
6:41
All the air is gone.
6:42
You're good to go.
6:44
And I immediately ran down here and I
6:47
logged on to do my show with you
6:49
all and forgot to tell my wife that
6:51
I'm OK.
6:53
Yeah, I want to shoot her a text.
6:54
Hey, the house did not explode.
6:56
FYI, we are good to go.
6:59
I love people like that, by the way.
7:02
I don't I don't care how it happened.
7:05
I don't care.
7:06
Like, I don't need any of that.
7:07
Just point me where the problem is and
7:09
let me go fix it.
7:11
No, that is not his first rodeo.
7:13
Yeah,
7:13
it was not his first rodeo at all.
7:18
He knew what he was doing.
7:19
And he turned the corner and he looked
7:22
at the pipe hanging off the wall.
7:24
And you just saw, like,
7:25
he was in front of me,
7:27
facing away from me,
7:28
but I could see the eye roll through
7:30
his head.
7:30
Yeah, go ahead.
7:36
Love it.
7:37
Absolutely love it.
7:38
Absolutely love it.
7:40
So the house has not exploded.
7:42
I am still here.
7:44
But I will tell you what.
7:46
We live to fight another day.
7:47
I took my lawn chair out when I
7:49
evacuated.
7:51
I sat out by the street.
7:53
Got in my chair.
7:55
Twenty minutes away from my work computer.
7:58
Was pretty glorious.
7:59
Nice day outside?
8:00
Yeah.
8:01
yeah yeah it hasn't gotten hot yet it's
8:04
supposed to get up to like today but
8:07
um but we're not there yet and my
8:09
tree was shading the area i was at
8:11
until until it was gonna blow off like
8:14
well i mean you know an exploding tree
8:17
is not my favorite kind of tree if
8:18
i'm being completely honest but at the
8:20
time creating nice shade and i could have
8:23
sat there for a while man it was
8:25
it was pretty gloria glorious
8:27
Twenty minutes sitting in a in a on
8:30
a sunny day,
8:31
but in the shade and a chair outside.
8:33
It's probably quiet because all the kids
8:35
are at school and shit.
8:36
Yeah.
8:36
Oh, I fell asleep.
8:38
I was close.
8:39
I fell smooth asleep right there.
8:42
Absolutely.
8:44
Absolutely.
8:45
Yeah.
8:47
Honestly,
8:47
having to evacuate my house for a
8:49
suspected gas leak mom time in my book.
8:51
Look, hey, gas dude,
8:53
here's my phone number.
8:55
Just shoot me a text whenever everything's
8:58
okay, and I'll come back at that point.
9:00
I'm just going to go take a walk
9:01
or something.
9:03
Yeah.
9:04
When you go to get in your truck,
9:06
can you just nudge me on the shoulder
9:07
so I wake up and can go back
9:09
inside?
9:09
Yeah, please.
9:12
Oh, that's me all day.
9:18
Well, we got that going for us.
9:20
Nothing else.
9:21
Yeah.
9:22
Here we are.
9:25
um definitely took a nap dude i was
9:29
so close it was so nice there was
9:31
a breeze a gentle breeze blowing by just
9:35
like kissing my cheek it's a wednesday it
9:38
was a short week to begin with outside
9:41
and i gotta deal with none of the
9:42
nonsense i normally deal with oh yeah i'm
9:44
napping i am one percent
9:47
Steve,
9:48
I didn't even reach for my work computer,
9:50
my laptop.
9:51
No.
9:51
Sorry, guys.
9:53
They told me to evacuate.
9:55
I'm sorry.
9:56
I am evacuating.
9:59
I am following the protocols.
10:01
Yeah.
10:02
The safety person with the gas company.
10:04
I don't know if he knows that,
10:05
but gas is flammable pretty bad.
10:07
Like it'll explode.
10:08
And he told me to leave.
10:09
So I'm just going to leave.
10:10
I'll be back soon as they tell me
10:12
it's fine.
10:13
You know, two,
10:13
three hours from now when they get it
10:14
fixed, no big deal.
10:16
And because I'm not a referee in the
10:18
Michigan football game,
10:19
I followed the protocols of how it's
10:21
supposed to be done.
10:24
The meme I sent you the other day,
10:26
I'm still laughing at where it said up
10:28
until Saturday,
10:30
NCAA teams were whatever the number was.
10:35
And oh, after regulation.
10:38
After leading after regulation.
10:40
After regulation.
10:42
I'm still laughing about that.
10:44
Still laughing about that.
10:45
That is so good.
10:47
so i don't even i so i have
10:49
nothing prepared for today's show but i do
10:52
have one saved instagram reel that i have
10:55
to share with the world if you've been
10:58
listening to the show for any length of
10:59
time you know that i love two things
11:02
in this world that's my wife and jamis
11:04
winston no absolutely
11:08
And they have a new commercial for
11:11
Gordash.
11:12
Oh, I was going to say,
11:13
your wife's doing commercials with James
11:15
Winston?
11:15
That's awesome.
11:16
So if you've not seen it.
11:19
I have not.
11:20
So when he was at Florida State and
11:23
he was like the Mac Daddy and the
11:25
Daddy Mac.
11:26
Yep.
11:26
Right.
11:27
Daddy of the Mac Daddy.
11:28
Ended up winning the Heisman.
11:32
He was the shit back then.
11:34
There was a predicament in which he walked
11:40
out of a Publix with crab legs that
11:44
he did not purchase.
11:45
Correct.
11:47
And it was getting some crab legs,
11:52
no big deal.
11:53
Yes.
11:54
So you have to know that to understand
11:56
this meme.
11:57
or this real.
11:59
And so for your pleasure.
12:02
Yes, please.
12:03
The great Jameis Winston.
12:11
Give it some volume here.
12:13
These are free, right?
12:16
Free.
12:16
Free.
12:17
Free.
12:19
Free.
12:20
Free.
12:20
Free.
12:20
Free.
12:20
Free.
12:21
Free.
12:21
Free.
12:21
Free.
12:21
Free.
12:22
Free.
12:22
Free.
12:22
Free.
12:23
Free.
12:23
Free.
12:23
Free.
12:24
Free.
12:24
Free.
12:24
Free.
12:24
Free.
12:24
Free.
12:24
Free.
12:24
Free.
12:42
he's free right god bless james the fact
12:48
that he takes like the the worst day
12:53
of well probably not the worst day of
12:54
his life but right like a day that
12:56
has lived in infamy for years and lean
12:59
one hundred percent right into that thing
13:02
and make it so funny that's great that
13:06
is fantastic
13:07
I don't DoorDash,
13:08
but I would just because of that
13:10
commercial.
13:11
That would make me think twice about it.
13:13
That is fantastic.
13:14
Good on him, dude.
13:15
Good on him.
13:17
You mean they're not free?
13:19
What do you mean they're not free?
13:23
Oh, my gosh.
13:24
And the funny thing is that Publix was
13:27
right by where I worked in Tallahassee.
13:29
Shopped there all the time.
13:31
not one time did the lady behind the
13:33
seafood counter give me free crab legs
13:36
that's nonsense i'm bitter you should be i
13:40
would i didn't i didn't win a heisman
13:42
uh i didn't fill a stadium full of
13:45
eighty thousand college football fans but
13:47
damn it why don't i get free crab
13:49
legs i don't think that really matters
13:51
scott be honest with you like if i
13:52
were you i'd be in there no i
13:54
mean some people get free crab legs and
13:56
some people don't what's up with that lady
13:58
i don't understand
14:00
I think he definitely got the raw end
14:02
of that deal because whoever was back
14:04
there flinging it to him,
14:06
thinking they were doing him a favor,
14:09
right?
14:10
Just go ahead, man.
14:11
He's like, man, he's my favorite player.
14:13
I'm going to give him a box of
14:14
crab legs.
14:15
Holy shit, that's Jameis Winston.
14:16
That's awesome.
14:17
And then somebody got taken out.
14:24
Coach Tomlin got caught astray.
14:26
He did.
14:27
That is.
14:28
Marcus Freeman has now called out Mike
14:31
Tomlin for his hair sharpies.
14:35
No, that is terrible.
14:38
Mike Tomlin was just minding his own
14:40
business,
14:41
getting ready to do his show on NBC.
14:49
And here we are.
14:50
He just woke up to that tweet like,
14:51
wait a minute, hold up.
14:54
You're just giving out secrets, man.
14:56
That's messed up.
14:59
Yeah.
15:00
I don't think that was Marcus Freeman's
15:01
story to tell.
15:02
No, not at all.
15:04
Not at all.
15:06
That's messed up, dude.
15:07
That's messed up.
15:10
So we got a weatherman down here.
15:12
I used to have a weatherman down here
15:13
for the longest time, Bob Breck,
15:15
who was wearing an obvious toupee.
15:18
Everybody knew it.
15:19
You see him out in public doing a
15:21
live remote or something like that.
15:23
I don't understand how he's keeping it
15:24
taped to his head type deal.
15:25
That'd be like some bald dude just going,
15:30
oh yeah,
15:30
that's the same kind of toupee tape Bob
15:32
Breck uses.
15:33
Hold up, bro.
15:33
Why don't you just leave that man alone?
15:35
That ain't cool.
15:38
That ain't cool at all.
15:43
At least it's not the spray on hair
15:44
like the guy from Ron Popeil.
15:48
Ron Popeil.
15:50
Ron Popeil.
15:54
The fuzzy hair spray.
15:59
Oh, no.
16:00
Ron Popeo had a whole bunch of stuff,
16:01
didn't he?
16:02
Oh,
16:03
he did the set it and forget it
16:06
rotisserie.
16:07
He did the Chop-O-Matic was his first big
16:11
invention.
16:15
Chop-O-Matic.
16:21
uh your boy about to make an appearance
16:23
in my story as i'm about to do
16:25
the bouncy hang clean jy says is cheating
16:28
my answer is it's just kipping pull-ups if
16:31
it's easier to do it then hey i
16:37
lost my audio give me a second i'm
16:38
coming out and come right back uh they
16:43
were classic commercials uh ramirez they
16:46
were so good
16:48
Ron Pope said it and forget it.
16:53
I don't know if you guys saw,
16:55
speaking of Mike Tomlin, NBC,
16:58
football is tonight.
16:59
I saw Joseph say that earlier in the
17:01
comments.
17:03
Football starts tonight.
17:04
It's on NBC.
17:05
And they have done a marketing campaign
17:09
with the camel from Geico.
17:13
It's home day, that thing.
17:16
And Mike Tirico and Mike Tomlin are on
17:19
the call.
17:21
And you know how the camel is like,
17:25
Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike,
17:27
you know what day it is, right?
17:29
And he does it to those two.
17:30
It is a great, great commercial.
17:33
Great commercial.
17:38
The Vegematic.
17:39
Is that what it was called?
17:40
The Vegematic?
17:42
It was like a spring-loaded blade that you
17:44
just put it in a jar.
17:47
You'd screw it on,
17:48
and it would just bounce and cut.
17:51
Slap chop.
17:53
I think that was the Timu version of
17:55
the Ron Popeil invention.
17:58
Slap chop dude was pretty awesome,
18:00
although he was a terrible human being.
18:03
Yeah,
18:04
I think the Ron Popeil was called –
18:06
it was either – Ramirez is saying
18:08
Vegematic.
18:09
It might have been Vegematic.
18:10
It might have been Vegematic.
18:11
I thought it was Chop-o-matic.
18:13
I want to say that one was called
18:15
the Vegematic because the Slap Chop dude
18:16
did the Slap Chop,
18:17
and that was the Chop thing.
18:20
And then they did the remix of the
18:21
Slap Chop, people.
18:23
I say that every Wednesday just like that.
18:25
Here's my problem with that, Tessa,
18:27
is that my boss does that joke every
18:31
Wednesday.
18:33
Oh, the hump day?
18:34
What day it is.
18:36
Oh, my God.
18:37
No.
18:38
No.
18:39
You see, they brought it.
18:40
They did a new version of it.
18:41
Is that what we're talking about?
18:41
The new version of it?
18:43
Yeah, when you were off messing around.
18:46
I lost my audio for a second.
18:47
Did your long man hit the cable?
18:50
No.
18:51
I'm at work,
18:52
so I hope to God not.
18:55
They are redoing the stucco outside,
18:58
but I don't think it has anything to
18:59
do with what's going on in here.
19:01
oh yeah i saw that commercial i forgot
19:04
during what and i was like that sounds
19:06
like a terrible idea like why would you
19:10
why would you bring that back that was
19:12
so annoying you know they should bring
19:14
back is terry the only funny part of
19:17
the bringing it back is that it's mike
19:19
terrico and mike tomlin so the mike mike
19:21
mike mike mike part mike mike right yeah
19:24
that's it though yeah that's it if they
19:26
want to bring back anything they need to
19:27
bring back terry tate office linebacker
19:29
that
19:31
That's high quality advertisement.
19:34
It's one of my, but like, it's,
19:36
it's like that great movie that should
19:38
they have done the sequel?
19:41
Like, how do you,
19:42
how do you make it better?
19:44
Yeah.
19:44
The only way you bring it back is
19:46
just to run the old one again.
19:48
That just make it fresh.
19:50
That's all you have to do.
19:51
Just use, use a different dude.
19:53
It didn't need to be Terry Tate.
19:54
Right.
19:54
Yeah.
19:56
Come up with some other guy.
19:58
Because it's all the stupid shit that
19:59
people do in the office and he makes
20:01
them pay for it.
20:03
You know, when you drink the last coffee,
20:06
you make another pot, Susan.
20:07
The lady walks by.
20:10
Leave the paper jam in the copier.
20:15
Gosh, those were so good.
20:16
Terry Crews.
20:17
Yes,
20:17
Terry Crews would be perfect to play Terry
20:20
Crews.
20:21
Again,
20:22
I think that commercial was perfection,
20:25
and to modify it in any way would
20:27
be criminal.
20:28
I have watched it again just recently.
20:30
Just pull it out,
20:32
blow off the VHS tape,
20:34
throw it in the machine, and rerun it.
20:37
Here's the thing.
20:38
I don't even remember what it was for.
20:41
I don't remember what it was a commercial
20:43
for.
20:43
I want to say it was for Staples.
20:46
But I could be wrong.
20:48
I have absolutely no idea.
20:49
I know this much.
20:50
I don't care.
20:52
Whatever it was,
20:53
I really don't give a damn because it
20:55
was absolutely hilarious.
20:57
Somebody was bringing it up.
20:58
It was one of those, you know,
20:59
remember this post on Instagram or
21:01
something along those lines.
21:04
And I went back and watched the entire.
21:07
It was for Reebok.
21:09
Really?
21:10
It was for Reebok.
21:12
Damn, good job, Mark Phillips.
21:15
damn yeah it is uh it's hard to
21:24
it sucks that you don't remember so it
21:26
wasn't like a great commercial it was a
21:29
great commercial i just don't remember
21:30
what it was commercial for because i was
21:31
too busy laughing at it the entire time
21:33
to even consider what they might have been
21:35
selling for it and at the time i
21:37
wasn't wearing reebok
21:43
outside the box thinking hey buddy and
21:50
since terry's been with us our
21:51
productivity has gone up we're getting
21:57
more employees than ever before you know
22:01
you need a cover sheet what's really
22:07
impressed me is how terry's become part of
22:08
the felcher family
22:13
Get high, baby.
22:14
He fits right in here.
22:20
That's a lone business call, Doug.
22:21
To be honest,
22:22
I wish Reebok sent us ten Terry Tates.
22:23
He's in the Wednesday game scene.
22:23
Well, when it's game time, it's pay time,
22:30
baby.
22:30
Woo!
22:39
You know you need a cover report on
22:41
your TBS.
22:43
TBS report.
22:44
That ain't new, baby.
22:45
Woo.
22:51
When it's game time, it's pay time.
22:53
Oh, God.
22:58
That is so good.
22:59
The ad's ability to increase recognition
23:01
of the Reebok brand has been questioned
23:03
with only fifty five percent of
23:04
respondents on the online poll indicating
23:07
they realized the ad was affiliated with
23:09
the company.
23:10
Yeah, there you go.
23:13
So what does that say about the
23:16
advertising?
23:19
It was clever.
23:19
It was unbelievably clever.
23:21
Well put together.
23:22
It's still funny as shit today.
23:27
Oh, it was for Reebok.
23:29
Oh, okay.
23:31
It is essentially an SNL skit.
23:34
Yes.
23:34
That someone grabbed and threw on as an
23:37
advertisement.
23:38
Yes.
23:39
It's an SNL skit that they ran by,
23:43
what's his name,
23:43
because they do it before every show,
23:46
and he was like, no,
23:47
we're not putting that on there.
23:48
Lorne Michaels.
23:49
Yeah, they ran by Lorne Michaels,
23:50
and they were like, mm-mm.
23:51
He was like, no, we're not doing that.
23:53
That's just stupid.
23:53
And then they made a commercial out of
23:55
it, and he went back and went, okay,
23:57
so it probably would have worked.
23:58
All right, sorry.
24:04
Our office admin used to think someone was
24:06
stealing the office supplies.
24:07
So next delivery,
24:08
I took all boxes of tissues and had
24:10
them hanging out of every pocket of my
24:12
briefcase.
24:16
Yes.
24:17
I think Tessa is an instigator.
24:19
It seems like it.
24:20
Good.
24:21
She likes to live on the edge.
24:23
Dude, it's my kind of person right there.
24:27
Like, oh, oh, somebody's stealing stuff.
24:28
Okay, cool.
24:29
Watch this.
24:31
That's like the old BASF commercials.
24:33
I never knew what the FBASF even was.
24:38
Weren't they like... I don't even...
24:40
They make all kinds of stuff.
24:42
Yeah,
24:42
weren't they like cassettes and videotapes
24:44
and like all...
24:47
there's a basf plant not far from here
24:50
chemical plant where they make all kinds
24:51
of shit like they are they got their
24:53
hands in on it all kind of stuff
24:55
so yeah you could be looking at it
24:56
and be like what the hell is a
24:57
basf nobody really knows yeah we have a
25:01
dow chemical plant in southern ohio it's
25:03
the only place i know of where people
25:05
have three arms and uh green teeth glow
25:08
in the dark baby glow in the dark
25:11
yeah we don't make whatever we make
25:13
whatever
25:17
They really don't, FYI.
25:22
Better world through chemistry.
25:26
Better living through chemistry.
25:27
That's a different type of...
25:28
You need to multitask.
25:29
We can grow you a third arm.
25:30
Bro.
25:33
I mean, we got...
25:36
Let's see.
25:36
Within where I'm standing right now,
25:39
there is a BASF plant.
25:43
There is a Dow Chemical plant within
25:48
twenty miles straight line.
25:49
There is a nuclear power plant within
25:52
sixty miles straight line.
25:55
It's up and down in Mississippi.
25:56
Yeah, dude,
25:56
there's all kinds of weird shit around
25:58
here.
26:01
It's my favorite show of all time.
26:05
Oh, good old Homer Simpson.
26:08
Hey, bro.
26:08
They don't call it Cancer Alley for
26:09
nothing.
26:09
Dude,
26:12
I grew up in western Pennsylvania with oil
26:15
plant after oil refinery after oil
26:17
refinery after oil refinery.
26:19
Most of my high school classmates have had
26:22
cancer.
26:23
Yeah.
26:24
it is it is absolutely bonkers i know
26:28
a ton of people that had that and
26:30
that have have it had it had some
26:33
some form of it whatever you want to
26:35
call it um it's an absurd amount but
26:38
you know it's fine no big deal
26:41
You don't want to fall in the Mississippi
26:42
River down here on accident.
26:44
Number one,
26:45
they're not going to find you because it's
26:47
moving too fast.
26:48
It's too wide.
26:49
You're just going to end up in the
26:50
Gulf of Mexico, excuse me,
26:52
in the Gulf of America before you can.
26:54
But if they actually find your body,
26:57
it'll probably be on fire by the time
26:59
you get there.
27:00
First of all,
27:03
stop changing the names of everything.
27:05
I'm old.
27:06
I'm not good with change.
27:07
That's why I said Gulf of Mexico to
27:09
begin with.
27:10
It just comes out.
27:12
Especially living next to it for
27:14
forty-nine years.
27:15
Sorry, dude.
27:16
I understand what you're trying to do,
27:17
but I can't.
27:18
It's like when my daughter was growing up
27:21
and all the labels for everything changed
27:23
on who a person was,
27:25
what they identified as,
27:26
all this kind of stuff.
27:29
I just can't.
27:31
It's not that I dislike you.
27:34
I can't remember all this new stuff.
27:37
Yeah.
27:37
Like,
27:38
you can't throw a novel at me and
27:42
expect me to regurgitate it back to you
27:44
in two seconds.
27:49
Mm-hmm.
27:52
We always just said the Gulf.
27:53
Yeah, when I lived down there,
27:55
it was just the Gulf.
27:55
It's just the Gulf.
27:56
Mm-hmm.
28:01
And then talking about your river thing.
28:04
So I don't know if you saw this,
28:05
but the Pitt football coach was talking
28:08
about a player he had and how he
28:11
could be a great player,
28:12
but they had to fix him of a
28:14
few things.
28:15
And they keep catching him down at the
28:18
river in downtown Pittsburgh fishing and
28:24
then eating what he catches.
28:27
Probably not a great idea.
28:31
And the coach is like,
28:32
that's not good for him.
28:33
Like we've got to break him of that
28:35
habit.
28:36
And I think he said he's from Louisiana
28:38
and that's just the way they do it.
28:41
It don't really much matter, dude.
28:42
They got retention ponds over here,
28:44
around here that are right next to
28:46
chemical plants that I will see people
28:47
sitting there fishing in.
28:50
No.
28:52
There's a reason those ponds are there,
28:53
and it's not for you to cast a
28:56
line.
28:56
It's a bad idea.
29:00
Pat McAfee made a big comment about it
29:01
because he is a fellow Pittsburgher.
29:04
And he's like, yeah,
29:05
you don't even want to dip your toe
29:07
in those rivers,
29:08
especially the Monongahela.
29:10
No.
29:11
You don't want to anywhere from...
29:15
baton rouge proper on south you do not
29:19
want to find yourself getting wet inside
29:22
the mississippi river probably not a good
29:25
idea just throwing that out there yeah um
29:32
Cousin Boudreaux will fish anywhere and
29:34
eat whatever he catches.
29:36
I know people like that, dude.
29:37
I know people that will go out and
29:39
because you can catch some big ass catfish
29:42
in some of the eddies where the river
29:45
will turn and there'll be a spot where
29:46
you can actually stand there and fish
29:48
without the water moving seventy miles an
29:49
hour.
29:51
You can catch some big ass catfish right
29:52
there, but I'm not eating them.
29:55
And I'm from here.
29:56
Right.
29:58
So I just learned this when I was
30:00
like fifty four years old.
30:02
So my,
30:03
my dad grew up in the middle of
30:05
nowhere, very self-sustaining family.
30:09
They grew a lot of their own food,
30:11
did a lot of stuff.
30:13
Apparently when I was a kid,
30:17
we didn't know what we were eating because
30:20
if they saw roadkill, it was, Hey,
30:23
that's good meat.
30:25
Yeah.
30:26
That's fresh.
30:29
And I'm glad I didn't know it at
30:30
the time.
30:33
But now that I know it now,
30:35
I'm just like, what the hell?
30:37
Well, I mean...
30:39
But clearly it was a different time.
30:40
It was a different time.
30:42
Yeah, clearly it didn't hurt you.
30:43
Dude, when I was a kid, like, ten,
30:45
twelve, thirteen years old,
30:46
we would go get crawfish out the ditches
30:48
off the side of the road with set
30:51
nets.
30:51
Put them in buckets so we had enough
30:53
to boil and then go back home and
30:55
eat them.
30:55
Or catch garfish out of some of the
30:58
big drainage ditches and whatnot.
30:59
Like, it's not that hard to do.
31:01
And...
31:02
doesn't really take any a whole lot i
31:03
say it doesn't take a whole lot of
31:04
effort for us it didn't take a whole
31:05
lot of effort because it's something that
31:06
we're used to doing right grab a piece
31:09
of something that they'll eat because
31:11
they'll take a bite on just about anything
31:13
catch you one bring it back they're a
31:15
pain in the ass to clean but makes
31:17
good meat uh i hated it when my
31:23
dad fed me things i had no idea
31:25
of like mountain oysters yeah i've never
31:27
done that i don't think um but my
31:32
Like my mom's family,
31:33
like they raised rabbits.
31:34
We had rabbit for dinner a lot.
31:36
We like those kinds of things like that.
31:39
I had a lot of,
31:41
I've eaten a lot of,
31:42
like I've had moose, I've had bear,
31:44
I've had elk,
31:45
I've had all those kinds of things and
31:48
love all of them.
31:49
I've had elk.
31:50
I've never had moose.
31:51
I've wanted to try bear.
31:53
I've never had an opportunity to yet.
31:56
You need to slow cook the bear.
31:58
It has to be smoked over like sixteen
32:02
hours.
32:03
It's a tough meat.
32:08
I've had rabbit more times than I can
32:09
count just because of where I'm from or
32:11
whatnot.
32:13
The
32:16
course because i'm trying to remember the
32:17
name of it um they just closed not
32:19
too long ago but it's a historic new
32:20
orleans restaurant that we went to for
32:23
easter one year and one of their easter
32:25
specials was rabbit pot pie and i'm like
32:28
that is absolutely interesting choice for
32:32
easter bunny day on easter sundays to have
32:35
rabbit pot pie but god it was so
32:37
good uh alligator gar aren't they bony as
32:42
hell
32:42
Yes,
32:42
they are a pain in the ass to
32:43
clean, Birch.
32:44
They are a pain in the ass to
32:46
clean.
32:47
What is alligator gar?
32:49
It's a garfish that can grow up to
32:51
like six, seven feet tall.
32:53
Yeah, we had gar here too.
32:55
But it's got a pointy mouth.
32:58
It's hard to explain.
32:59
It's kind of long.
33:00
It's got teeth on it.
33:02
We just never called them alligator gar.
33:04
We just called them gar.
33:04
Yeah, well.
33:07
but yeah they're super bony yeah
33:09
louisiana's got to put their own spin on
33:10
it i guess hey bro it's just where
33:12
we are it's just where we are i've
33:17
had gator tail love gator tail telling
33:21
somebody about gator yesterday as a matter
33:23
of fact gator is actually unbelievably
33:25
good for you like it's super lean um
33:28
it's really really tasty if you cook it
33:30
right it's tender as shit like
33:32
It takes on,
33:33
it's got a good player profile.
33:35
You can get your hands on Gator.
33:37
Absolutely eat it.
33:38
I was in,
33:41
what's that place in South Carolina that
33:44
Paula Dean's from?
33:45
Savannah.
33:46
Savannah.
33:47
Savannah.
33:48
And they had a restaurant there that made
33:50
Gator gumbo.
33:51
I literally ate it every single day I
33:53
was there.
33:55
You didn't go to Paula Deen's to get
33:57
the butter special?
33:58
I went to Paula Deen's and got so
34:00
sick from how rich the food was.
34:03
Yeah.
34:04
My parents went and said the same thing.
34:06
They said,
34:08
a mom made it because you had to
34:09
make a reservation and get on a waiting
34:11
list to make a reservation and all that
34:13
shit.
34:13
And they said they got in there and
34:14
they were not impressed.
34:17
Yeah, it's a warehouse.
34:20
It's like nothing special.
34:23
Yeah.
34:23
No, just not, not by that.
34:25
Just by the fact that like, you know,
34:26
she's supposed to be so famous and this
34:29
big, you know, notoriety chef lady, blah,
34:32
blah, whatever she says,
34:33
food really wasn't all that great.
34:35
We were, we were,
34:36
I was with people that loved every bit
34:38
of it, but that's when,
34:41
that's when I went from five hundred to
34:42
like two fifty.
34:43
Yeah.
34:44
Like I was eating nothing but like good
34:46
food.
34:47
Right.
34:47
And that, that shit ripped me up.
34:50
It will, it will.
34:53
That's a thing that people,
34:56
I've learned on my own, right?
34:59
I get on a cut, you know,
35:02
getting ready for a comp or whatever,
35:03
trying to get down, lean down,
35:04
and my wife talks me into,
35:07
let's go get power, just, you know,
35:09
you all right for one meal?
35:10
And I feel like shit for the next
35:13
eight hours,
35:13
nine hours until it passes through.
35:16
It's terrible.
35:16
What wrong thing?
35:24
I'm trying to find our chat.
35:29
And I can't.
35:30
Oh, there it is.
35:32
Because I sent you guys a thing yesterday.
35:34
Speaking of buffets.
35:41
This came out on Instagram yesterday.
35:44
And Corey and I had the exact same
35:47
response.
35:49
So this is the best to worst sit-down
35:52
restaurants for fat loss.
35:54
Yeah.
35:56
Now,
35:57
if you've been following the show at all,
36:00
Golden Corral advertises their protein
36:04
buffet,
36:05
yet they're down at the F stage for
36:09
fat loss.
36:11
I'm just saying, dude.
36:12
It's the protein buffet.
36:14
Buffet.
36:15
You cannot,
36:16
the golden corral slander will not be
36:18
tolerated on this show.
36:19
Not when the protein buffet is just out
36:22
there for the whole world to enjoy.
36:23
That's messed up.
36:26
This might be an old list.
36:27
They might have put this out a while
36:28
back and then before they realized that
36:30
the golden corral is now like the protein
36:31
capital of the United States.
36:36
Yeah,
36:36
it might be before they launched the
36:39
protein buffet.
36:41
Hooters is all chicken.
36:43
Why is that number E?
36:45
I don't understand that at all.
36:49
Aren't they breaded wings?
36:51
I get my ten naked Daytona.
36:55
That's every single time.
36:56
Dude,
36:57
there's no Hooters around here anymore.
36:59
They are all closed.
37:00
There's one I know of in Baton Rouge,
37:03
and I don't know if the one in
37:04
Metairie is still open.
37:06
Actually, it might be two in Baton Rouge.
37:08
There used to be two in Baton Rouge
37:09
for sure.
37:10
I think there's only one now.
37:12
And then who in their right mind is
37:14
ever going to Chuck E.
37:15
Cheese to figure it out?
37:17
Let me ask you this.
37:18
How is Chuck E.
37:19
Cheese ahead of the Golden Corral?
37:23
Even before they did their protein buffet,
37:29
how is Chuck E.
37:30
Cheese even on the freaking list to begin
37:33
with?
37:33
That makes no sense whatsoever.
37:37
And, you know,
37:38
our very lovely Ariel Lowen always goes to
37:43
Denny's on a comp day,
37:45
and there they are sitting at D.
37:49
She's probably incensed.
37:50
She's probably still mad.
37:53
In all reality.
37:54
Look at this.
37:56
IHOP.
37:57
IHOP is a C tier?
37:58
Come on, dude.
37:58
I understand it being full of.
38:03
Frickin' Chuck E. Cheese,
38:04
for Christ's sake.
38:07
But why is it even...
38:08
That makes no sense, dude.
38:10
Well, IHOP has eggs.
38:11
If you just go in and get a
38:12
couple egg whites, you're probably okay.
38:15
You can get a Colorado omelet.
38:17
They have a badass Colorado omelet,
38:19
which is just meat and eggs.
38:22
Here's what I don't understand.
38:24
Another thing, too.
38:25
BJ's...
38:27
You ever been to BJ's Brewhouse?
38:29
Yeah, they've got a menu so big.
38:31
It's a phone book.
38:32
I get a seared tuna salad there.
38:35
Yeah.
38:36
The first time I brought my wife to
38:38
BJ's, she had never been.
38:39
And the lady plopped the menu down, right?
38:43
It hits the table like that.
38:47
She is not good with way too many
38:50
choices, right?
38:50
Like she needs...
38:52
She needs lanes to be able to bounce
38:54
off of and kind of stay within.
38:56
And she starts flipping through.
38:57
She's like,
38:57
I need you to just pick something.
38:58
This is entirely too much stuff.
39:00
I can't,
39:01
this is way too much stuff on there.
39:03
I am with or, or take on this.
39:06
How is Fogo to chow a low outback?
39:12
It's meat on a stick.
39:14
They literally come by with meat on a
39:17
stick and just be like, here,
39:18
would you like some of this?
39:19
Yes, I would.
39:20
Yeah.
39:23
And they have chicken.
39:25
You could just get chicken.
39:27
You can literally just get chicken.
39:30
Why is Red Lobster?
39:31
Again, that's another one.
39:32
Here we go.
39:33
Red Lobster.
39:34
The first thing they do is bring you
39:36
a bowl of Cheddar Bay Biscuits whenever
39:38
you sit down.
39:40
Every piece of seafood is in a vat
39:42
of butter.
39:43
These people are high.
39:46
Whoever made this list needs their
39:50
restaurant going card revoked.
39:54
This is bullshit.
39:56
P.F.
39:56
Chang, Olive Garden, B tier.
39:59
Come on.
39:59
For real?
40:00
For what exactly?
40:04
Come get our really healthy,
40:05
never-ending pasta bowl.
40:07
That ought to do you pretty good.
40:09
Yeah,
40:10
and then come get the salad that we
40:11
put like eight gallons of olive oil on
40:14
to start.
40:15
And then have a salt stick on the
40:17
side.
40:19
Salt carb stick.
40:20
Here's this carb.
40:22
Here's this salted up carb stick.
40:24
This ought to make you pretty good right
40:25
here.
40:26
Now, I'll take a sit.
40:28
These people got paid off.
40:31
I'll give you like bonefish should be up
40:34
in that upper tier.
40:35
Yeah, I'll give you that one.
40:37
And Outback, you can get a good steak,
40:39
good salad, the whole bit.
40:40
You can get a steak and potato from
40:41
Outback and call it good.
40:43
You don't even need to get the –
40:44
I mean, the salad comes with it.
40:46
But literally, like Fogo,
40:48
you're not even – like it's rotisserie
40:51
meat on a stick.
40:53
Yeah.
40:53
All the – Texas Day Brazil would be
40:55
the same place.
40:55
Like that should both be up in S.
40:57
And then a giant salad bar buffet deal
41:01
like going on at the same time.
41:04
Yeah, this is insane.
41:07
Ortega is correct.
41:09
Why is the Sizzler not on the list?
41:15
Bring back the Sizzler.
41:18
In the Ponderosa Buffet.
41:21
The Ponderosa Buffet.
41:22
The ten-cent steak on the Ponderosa
41:25
Buffet.
41:28
You want another one of them steaks?
41:29
Go get you one of them before we
41:31
leave.
41:33
It's like,
41:35
have you seen the new Arby's thing?
41:37
The steak nuggets?
41:38
Yes, I have.
41:39
My daughter was,
41:41
my daughter was freaking out.
41:42
Daddy.
41:43
Cause she loves steak.
41:43
Right.
41:44
But she's eight.
41:45
So she doesn't understand how the world
41:46
works yet.
41:47
And she's like, yeah.
41:50
They got steak nuggets at Arby's.
41:52
I said, Jameson,
41:53
if you think for two seconds I'm bringing
41:55
you to Arby's for anything aside from to
41:58
stop and use the restroom while we're on
42:00
a road trip,
42:01
you are out of your mind.
42:03
I'm not buying my steak from Arby's.
42:05
Hey, where are you going?
42:08
I might as well grab my dress shoe
42:10
and start gnawing on the toe.
42:13
I get steak from Arby's.
42:15
I just soon go to the Golden Corral
42:17
and get the protein buffet.
42:19
I'm just throwing that out there because
42:20
that's probably better for me at this
42:22
point.
42:22
And a Diet Coke.
42:24
And a Diet Coke.
42:26
I'll bypass the chocolate fountain.
42:28
I'll go ahead and just leave that right
42:29
there where it's at.
42:31
I wonder if since COVID has been a
42:35
thing,
42:36
if they still have the chocolate fountain.
42:37
Because I can remember how for a while...
42:40
I think it's back.
42:42
like buffets went away completely because
42:44
they didn't want so i'm wondering because
42:46
it seems like that seems like that would
42:48
be like the chocolate fountain would
42:52
probably be a super spreader event all all
42:54
by itself i'm just saying oh i think
42:58
they brought back the chocolate buffet
43:00
people were their chocolate fountain i
43:02
think because people were like screw the
43:05
the we want our chocolate
43:07
Yeah.
43:08
I'm going to need you to turn that
43:09
chocolate fountain back on.
43:12
I don't want you to give a damn
43:13
about what else is happening,
43:15
but I need to put these strawberries up
43:16
underneath that chocolate and go about my
43:18
business.
43:18
Yes, ma'am.
43:19
You got it.
43:22
You say strawberries.
43:23
How about the people that just grab a
43:24
slice of cake and put it under the
43:25
chocolate fountain?
43:29
I think the last time I ever went
43:30
in one was...
43:34
It's been about eight to ten years.
43:35
I was working out of town,
43:37
and it was the closest thing to me.
43:39
And I was like, to hell with it.
43:41
Let's go check it out.
43:41
And that's probably the first time I saw
43:43
that they had one in there.
43:45
I was like, is that a chocolate fountain?
43:46
Because the only place I'd ever seen one
43:47
before that was at a wedding.
43:50
And just like you said,
43:51
somebody went up there with a slice of
43:53
cake that they got off of the buffet,
43:56
walked over to the chocolate fountain,
43:58
and just went.
44:00
And I was like, okay,
44:00
so I'm not getting anything out of that
44:02
chocolate fountain.
44:03
Cool.
44:03
Because like,
44:04
it didn't just hit the cake and hit
44:05
their hand.
44:06
Like it bounced off the plate and then
44:08
back into the fountain.
44:09
And now there's just,
44:09
I don't know if y'all know how fountains
44:10
work, but it just,
44:11
it's recycling the same stuff that's in
44:13
there.
44:14
Nope.
44:15
Nope.
44:15
Not doing any of that.
44:17
Cool.
44:17
Yep.
44:18
Not touching that with a tin foot pole.
44:19
Can I get some sugar on top of
44:21
my sugar?
44:22
Please, please, please.
44:24
And let's make sure some of the chocolate
44:25
bounces off the person's hand and then
44:28
goes back into the chocolate fountain
44:29
because I'm sure their hands are clean.
44:32
Why wouldn't they be?
44:36
Oh, speaking of chocolate, thirdsy.
44:38
Yeah.
44:39
Am I skipping my Thursday night to save
44:41
for the game?
44:42
Depends on how the game's going, Joseph.
44:47
If, say, hypothetically,
44:50
Seattle jumps out to a twenty one point
44:52
lead, probably going to take my Thursday,
44:55
get a good night's sleep,
44:56
recover so I can watch the Australian game
44:59
tomorrow night.
45:01
They're playing in Australia.
45:02
Yeah.
45:03
Who's playing in Australia?
45:05
The Rams and the Niners.
45:08
Well,
45:08
at least they're taking two West Coast
45:09
teams.
45:12
Yeah,
45:12
the Niners have been there a week to
45:14
adjust to the time zone.
45:16
The Rams are leaving this morning.
45:20
Really?
45:20
The Rams are taking the approach of we
45:23
don't want to adjust to the time because
45:24
then we'd have to adjust back to come
45:26
back.
45:26
So we're just going to go in,
45:28
play the game, fly out immediately.
45:31
Wow.
45:32
Isn't it like a thirty six hour flight?
45:36
i don't think it's i think it's i
45:38
have no idea yeah i don't um oh
45:46
my gosh i looked it up um i
45:49
saw it was picking it goes in the
45:51
sun i saw something do that on a
45:53
plane for you that's when you that's when
45:59
the marshall needs to get up from his
46:00
seat
46:02
and take care of business.
46:04
Duct tape that dude to the seat after
46:07
that.
46:08
I did look it up.
46:10
like to see how, uh,
46:12
just to see how much it would cost
46:13
to fly to Australia when semifinals were
46:16
starting,
46:16
because me and Jennifer were talking about
46:18
it one day while Jameson had, uh,
46:21
softball,
46:21
I think it might've been her tournament.
46:24
And anyway, and I was like, man,
46:26
I could,
46:27
I could probably still go compete in the,
46:28
uh, whichever one was,
46:31
is they were using as a semifinal.
46:34
Let me go see how much it costs
46:35
just to fly there and fly back.
46:41
To fly to Australia.
46:43
Now, granted,
46:44
I was looking at it to do it
46:45
like in two days or whatever it was,
46:47
like two, three days.
46:50
And I said, that is bananas crazy.
46:53
It's like thirty six hundred bucks round
46:55
trip.
46:56
Yes.
46:57
Should be a problem.
46:58
Just to reel in that gar.
47:01
Third Z now chocolate flavor available.
47:05
Fifteen percent off if you go jazzy.
47:09
at checkout or go to thirdsy.com backslash
47:12
jazzy.
47:13
Tried it last night with a little dash
47:15
of milk.
47:17
Heated it up in the microwave.
47:20
Nice bedtime snack.
47:22
Which one's better?
47:24
The salted caramel chocolate or just a
47:26
straight chocolate?
47:28
I'm a caramel guy,
47:29
so I like caramel better than chocolate.
47:32
Yeah.
47:33
But the chocolate was really good.
47:36
I'm sure it is.
47:37
Their flavor's on point.
47:39
Um, no, Ramirez,
47:40
I did not get to fly the plane.
47:41
However,
47:43
I would have demanded to fly the plane
47:47
or at least let me get in the
47:48
cockpit.
47:48
Like I was nine years old.
47:50
I mean,
47:50
can I get in there and just look
47:51
around for a little bit?
47:52
I don't know if you know this,
47:53
but if you try to get in the
47:54
cockpit these days, bad things happen.
47:56
you know i'd have knocked i would have
47:58
like kicked it open or anything like that
47:59
i'm just gonna go in there and you
48:03
know grab the fireman's axe and try to
48:05
work my way in freaking like uh here's
48:08
johnny on uh the shining i mean we
48:11
just gone politely do you remember the day
48:14
when you could see into the cockpit yes
48:16
i do i remember the days that you
48:18
should leave it open just leave the door
48:19
open that's not a thing anymore that's not
48:23
a thing anymore not at all
48:27
I was thinking, Ramirez,
48:28
like for thirty six hundred,
48:30
you probably did some time in space for
48:32
like the adventure.
48:33
Like you would think so.
48:36
You would think so.
48:36
It was a ridiculously long flight.
48:38
I know that for sure.
48:41
Like, no, thanks.
48:44
Birmingham, Sydney, United,
48:47
live flat seat.
48:52
Mark, that's a car.
48:54
It's a nice car.
48:57
Thirty two thousand.
48:59
There's that one way.
49:03
I hope to God it's round trip.
49:05
That's because that makes it so much
49:08
better.
49:12
I mean, a deal is a deal.
49:13
A deal.
49:14
Round trip.
49:16
Yeah.
49:16
I mean,
49:16
if I at least get myself back,
49:19
I think back,
49:19
they just tie you to the top of
49:20
the round trip on United Polaris.
49:24
That sounds fancy.
49:26
I mean, for that price,
49:27
I better get on the space shuttle.
49:30
For that price,
49:30
they had better let me fly the plane
49:33
for like an hour or so.
49:34
Just let me just sit up there.
49:36
I don't even need to fly it necessarily.
49:38
I just want to look out the front
49:39
window.
49:39
Like I was a little kid in a
49:41
car ride.
49:41
Like,
49:41
let me look and see what's going on,
49:43
even though you're not able to see
49:44
anything.
49:45
Whatever.
49:46
Yeah,
49:46
thank God we're past the point where there
49:48
were ashtrays in the drop-down trays on a
49:51
plane.
49:51
In the drop-down trays, yeah.
49:55
Yeah, for that price,
49:56
we're going to fly by the moon.
49:58
Now we know why Tia had to win.
50:01
Yeah,
50:01
to be able to afford to fly home.
50:05
And we know why Ellie stayed and married
50:06
Justin.
50:07
It was cheaper than flying back to
50:09
Australia.
50:09
That's one of them things.
50:10
It's a cheaper-to-keeper type deal.
50:12
Look, you know what?
50:14
We'll get you some citizenship.
50:15
It's fine.
50:17
No big deal.
50:19
And why she was pissed they were making
50:20
her go back to Australia to compete in
50:23
semifinals.
50:25
Bro.
50:27
just remember looking at it and it was
50:29
so it went because i didn't do what
50:30
mark did i was like just what does
50:32
it take for me like tie me to
50:34
the landing gear whatever like the
50:35
cheapest seat humanly possible to get
50:39
there and to get back and it was
50:42
i said so hypothetically hypothetically
50:45
say it's sixteen hours to fly i don't
50:47
and i have no idea what it is
50:49
i'm just saying nothing can you imagine
50:51
sitting in a coach seat nope for sixteen
50:54
hours
50:58
I don't know if it's...
50:59
Australia could be utopia,
51:03
and I'm not sure it'd be worth sitting
51:05
in a coach seat for sixteen hours.
51:08
LAX to Sydney is fourteen to fifteen
51:09
hours.
51:12
And for me to get to LAX,
51:14
that's another five.
51:16
yeah lax to melbourne is about sixteen
51:18
hours so my boss is uh his dad
51:22
lives in amsterdam so they go once he
51:25
goes once a year to go see him
51:26
right and i was asking about that i
51:28
was like okay so what's the flight time
51:29
on that he's like it's about eight and
51:31
a half nine hours across the atlantic i
51:34
said i would be stove up like there's
51:38
no way i'd be locked up he said
51:39
dude he's like as soon as we get
51:41
airborne people are up
51:43
He said, people up, just walking around,
51:45
moving.
51:45
Like I said, yeah,
51:46
there's no way I could stay that.
51:51
For me,
51:52
what sucked is I took an eight-hour nap,
51:53
and when I woke up,
51:54
we were still over the ocean.
52:01
Oh,
52:02
his thirty-two thousand dollar flight is
52:03
twenty-one hours.
52:06
Because he's in Birmingham.
52:10
That's insane.
52:11
But at least you have a lie down
52:13
seat.
52:14
Oh, yeah.
52:15
You can take almost three of Tessa's eight
52:18
hour naps.
52:20
Just like a day.
52:22
It's literally a day of travel.
52:25
the rams are gonna leave they're gonna i'm
52:27
sure they're flying they're gonna be on a
52:29
plane for twenty one ish hours or sixteen
52:33
to seventeen hours that's like that's a
52:36
really really long time now i hope to
52:39
god the nfl and or the team got
52:42
a really nice plane to take them
52:46
If you're the left tackle for the Rams
52:49
having to sit and coach for sixteen hours,
52:54
there's no way you could play.
52:55
Screaming kids in the background.
52:58
Kick in the back of your seat.
52:59
Are we there yet?
53:02
No.
53:02
Are we there yet?
53:03
No.
53:03
Are we there yet?
53:03
No.
53:04
Are we there yet?
53:05
And the person in front of you has
53:06
reclined.
53:07
Yeah.
53:09
As much reclining as you can possibly get.
53:16
uh i'm very late but i've been to
53:17
australia a few times to work it's a
53:19
long flight
53:21
yeah one of the dudes that uh at
53:22
the gym has been for work he works
53:24
for um john dare he's been to australia
53:28
a couple of times been to brazil a
53:29
couple times said that flight's also
53:31
stupid long flying into rio he said bro
53:36
i said oh his name's dusk dusk what
53:39
do you do he's like um i get
53:42
up i move around i take a nap
53:43
i get up i move around i take
53:45
a nap i get up i move around
53:46
he said i can't sit still that long
53:48
and i was like no i imagine not
53:49
The three and a half hour flight I'm
53:51
going to take next Wednesday to go see
53:53
my daughter to Salt Lake is like four
53:56
hours.
53:56
It's three and a half hours and it's
53:58
almost too much for me.
54:00
And then I got to get on another
54:01
plane for an hour to get from Salt
54:03
Lake City to Great Falls, Montana.
54:06
when we went to seattle uh the first
54:10
time our second flight was six hours long
54:14
and that was absurd absolutely absurd like
54:19
it i didn't see this is i need
54:22
to
54:22
I can't sit still that long.
54:24
I'm not built for it.
54:25
I need to get up.
54:25
I need to move around.
54:27
It's not like you're on a giant jumbo
54:31
jet where there's rows and you can
54:32
actually get up and move around.
54:34
I'm stuck between two people and there's
54:36
one aisle in the middle and there's three
54:37
people on the other side of me.
54:39
I ain't nowhere to go.
54:43
Joseph says you could fit in the luggage
54:45
and Wayne says get you one of those
54:46
furry outfits and I have someone drop you
54:48
off in a crate.
54:48
Yeah.
54:51
A bowl of food and water.
54:54
I just need water, honestly.
54:55
I'll probably nap most of the time.
54:58
Get nice and curled up.
54:59
I'm so comfy.
55:02
Well,
55:03
I understand it's really cold in the cargo
55:06
compartment, though.
55:06
All right, then.
55:12
Hey, your house didn't explode?
55:14
My house didn't explode.
55:16
I was able to do the show.
55:17
I thought we weren't going to be able
55:19
to pull it off.
55:20
They thought we was done for.
55:22
I was only four minutes late.
55:25
That's nothing.
55:27
That's nothing.
55:28
As the arbiters of truth,
55:29
the fact that we were only four minutes
55:31
late, honestly,
55:33
I think we're doing a pretty good job.
55:36
Well, on that note,
55:37
don't forget to like and subscribe,
55:38
people.
55:40
If you're here hanging out,
55:41
just hit the like button.
55:42
It's easy.
55:43
It's free.
55:45
It is.
55:48
Jay Birch, you are so far behind.
55:50
Yeah, not anymore.
55:53
Not anymore.
55:54
I had more than a leak.
55:55
I had a gas gush.
55:59
I had a gas, almost a blowout,
56:01
if we're being completely honest here.
56:03
It was not going to be good at
56:04
all.
56:07
But yeah,
56:09
I got a story to tell on the
56:10
show at the beginning.
56:11
Go back and listen to the beginning,
56:12
Jay Birch.
56:14
back and listen to it like it subscribe
56:16
it again even though i know you're already
56:17
subscribed sorry tell your friends yeah
56:25
tell a friend um you know what's awesome
56:28
about this audience though
56:30
We only have a little over three thousand
56:32
subscribers.
56:33
We've had shows in the last couple weeks
56:36
that have gotten fifteen hundred views.
56:39
Yeah,
56:39
which that's half of our subscribers.
56:42
Half of our subscribers.
56:44
We love y'all.
56:45
Keep keep your hundred thousand
56:47
subscribers.
56:49
I got loyal.
56:50
I got loyal subscribers and that's all
56:51
that matters to me.
56:53
With that, guys,
56:54
have a great rest of your day.
56:59
And we will catch you tomorrow on lunch
57:03
with the Clydesdale,
57:03
as long as no one hits my gas
57:05
pipe.
57:06
You wouldn't wait to get to the editing
57:07
room to jazz me up.
57:09
I'm already jazzy.
57:29
From the gym to the screen, yeah,
57:31
we cover it all.
57:34
Midday motivation every time we press
57:36
call.
57:38
Lunch with the Clydesdale,
57:39
cowboy in the heat.
57:41
CrossFit, movies, music, home repeat.
57:43
Half-hour hustle, yeah,
57:44
we building that brand.
57:45
Grab a plate, shoot it,
57:46
now you're part of the fam.