Latest / Mindful Success Path / 4 Hidden Reasons He Won't Provide for You (It's Not What You Think) | Feminine Energy Masterclass
Transcript
- 0:32If you have asked your man to provide for you and to cover you financially and he said no, then this video is for you.
- 0:42Because unlike what most dating coaches will tell you, which is lean back into your feminine energy, say it this way, say it that way, there's actually deeper shifts that need to happen inside of you so that the words coming out of your mouth actually match your energy, your internal state, and your nervous system.
- 1:01And in this video, I'm going to be describing four energetic blocks that will keep a man from providing for you, even if you ask him, even if he loves you, even if he's shown that he's great in o- every other area.
- 1:15If you have these four blocks, your ask isn't going to land very well.
- 1:21Hi, my name is Amanda.
- 1:23Welcome to this channel where we talk about how to manifest what you want in life without all the extra stress, chaos, and drama that most people are accustomed to.
- 1:31Lately, we've been talking a lot about polarity in relationships, uh, how to find provider men, how to communicate better in relationships.
- 1:40If that's something that you're interested in, make sure to subscribe and hit the notification bell so you don't miss a single video that we have coming out on this channel.
- 1:47And of course, if you find this content valuable, then make sure to share it with a girlfriend.
- 1:52And I have very, very exciting news.
- 1:55I've been sitting on a surprise for several weeks, and I'm finally ready to share it.
- 2:00So for a couple months, maybe even six months, many of you have been asking for some sort of a quiz or assessment that you can take that can help you determine what divine feminine energy stage you are in.
- 2:14Now, if you've been here for a while, then you've heard me talk about the four archetypes that I teach: The Wounded Maiden, The Awakening Warrior, The Conscious Queen, and The Magnetic Empress.
- 2:25And I'm happy to report that we finally have a free quiz available for you, so you can take this quick assessment.
- 2:32It takes less than three minutes to go through the whole thing, and at the end of the assessment, you will know which archetype you are.
- 2:40You will also receive a beautiful guide that lets you know, okay, here's how this archetype is showing up in your life.
- 2:46Here's what's going on in your relationships.
- 2:47Here's what's going on with your finances.
- 2:49Here's what's going on in other areas of your life.
- 2:52And in addition to that, it will show you what the next steps are in terms of being able to move up on those stages of consciousness.
- 3:00So it's finally, finally ready.
- 3:02It's finally available for those who've been asking.
- 3:05All you need to do is go to mindfulsuccesspath.com/quiz, and I will also have it in the description and in the first comment 100% free.
- 3:16Rather than having you guys try and assess yourselves in the comment section, I was like,"Well, why don't we create, like, an actual quiz so that they can know for sure which of these archetypes they fall under?" So let's talk about a pattern that comes up pretty often when I am coaching women or when they are students of ours or emails that they send in.
- 3:39And that scenario is you're with a good guy.
- 3:42Uh, he has shown that he is emotionally available, he's committed to you, he's faithful to you.
- 3:49All, all in all, he's a really good guy.
- 3:51There's just one rub, and the one rub is that you would like him to provide for you and pay all the bills, and when you ask him to, he says no.
- 4:03And then you get incredibly frustrated and start wondering whether or not this relationship is right for you, whether or not you've got a healthy man.
- 4:10And the good news is that this is actually really common.
- 4:13I can tell you, because I was a financial educator for seven to eight years, it was the first business.
- 4:18Google my name, you can go find everything I've done on Google.
- 4:22It's actually really common for couples to not be on the same page about finances.
- 4:27However, most people, most of the advice that they give you is really terrible.
- 4:32So on the one hand, you have advice like,"Figure out how to split things up equally," which we all know doesn't work to maintain long-term attraction in a relationship.
- 4:42Or they'll tell you things like,"Just be more clear with your ask." And you're like,"Well, how much more clear could I be?" Right?
- 4:49Or even worse, sometimes they tell you to just lean back into your feminine energy, don't say anything, and wait for this man to give you provision.
- 4:58They all miss the point.
- 4:59They all miss the mark.
- 5:01What's going on here is that a lot of women say they want something, they will ask for the thing that they want, but there's an incongruency in their energy.
- 5:11There's a mismatch between what is coming out of their mouths and what their body is giving off as a signal So the ask lives in your words, but how you actually feel about it and the patterns underneath it actually reside in your body, and men are able to pick that up.
- 5:30Men are actually very sensitive to a woman's energy and nervous system, which is why it's so important that we have to learn how to regulate ourselves.
- 5:39Everybody should learn how to regulate themselves.
- 5:41Just when a woman learns how to regulate herself, she gets more into feminine energy.
- 5:45When a man learns how to regulate himself, he gets more into masculine energy just naturally by default, which is why I talk so much about nervous system regulation on this channel Now, this isn't woo-woo.
- 5:57There's actually studies that have been done about this, that when your words and your body language or your energy do not match, then people are going to default to believing your body language rather than the words that are coming out of your mouth.
- 6:10So what's happening for a lot of women is that they have these four default energy leaks.
- 6:15These are the four actual beliefs that are in their system that are blocking the provision from an otherwise very good man.
- 6:24So let's go through what each of those four are.
- 6:27Number one, desperation.
- 6:29So this is when you have anxiety or urgency or you're looking for someone to save you.
- 6:34This is probably if you take the archetype quiz, you're probably wounded maiden.
- 6:38That's probably where we are if you are approaching provision from a place of desperation or anxiety.
- 6:45And basically what that means is you're totally overwhelmed, you are abdicating responsibility in your life, and you just want someone to come in and save the day.
- 6:54Sometimes, I'm just gonna say it, right?
- 6:56Sometimes you will see this with women who are overwhelmed.
- 6:59Maybe they're single moms, they have a couple of kids, they have a job, they're raising kids on their own.
- 7:05Obviously, there is a lot of overwhelm that comes with that, and sometimes, uh, those women get into a sense of desperation.
- 7:13Or sometimes it's women who perhaps don't have an education.
- 7:17That happens a lot with women who have less of an education.
- 7:20They tend to default more into the wounded maiden archetype and start looking for a savior.
- 7:26Now, in this scenario, it's also incredibly transactional, right?
- 7:31A lot of w- wounded maidens end up in transactional situations, right?
- 7:35So basically a man on his end, he's like,"Wait a minute.
- 7:39Is she asking for provision or is she prostituting herself?
- 7:42Like, what is actually going on here?" And the truth is that there is a difference between the two.
- 7:48Provision is non-transactional.
- 7:50Provision is a man honoring you, and a part of honoring you is providing for you.
- 7:54Prostitution is a man paying for things in exchange for something else.
- 7:59And those women who are coming from a place of desperation and anxiety, they tend to default to the latter.
- 8:05So that's what's going on there.
- 8:07The second block is resentment.
- 8:10So this is the woman who's been in a relationship for a while, and she has been carrying too much of the load for a long time, and she hasn't said anything about it.
- 8:21She definitely hasn't followed this channel.
- 8:23She definitely doesn't know about polarity in relationships, so she has basically become an over-functioning woman.
- 8:30And the over-functioning woman sometimes becomes a very resentful woman.
- 8:34In fact, not sometimes, most of the time she ends up becoming a very resentful woman.
- 8:40So she may be asking her husband to start covering more of the bills, providing more of the provision, but internally she's like,"I'm asking you this'cause I'm really pissed at you because this has been going on for way too long." And that woman never learned to ask for her needs.
- 8:55That woman never learned to, um, not over-function in order to receive love.
- 9:01That woman never learned how to communicate when she needs help.
- 9:06Um, the over-functioning woman, sometimes she's wounded maiden, sometimes she's awakening warrior.
- 9:12There's other variables at play there that would determine which one you are in, so make sure to take that free quiz, mindfulsuccesspath.com/quiz, so you know for sure which archetype is most dominant for you.
- 9:25But when you're making an ask and you're doing it from a place of resentment, then what the man is picking up on is resentment.
- 9:33He's picking up on,"She's really angry with me." He's picking up on,"I don't wanna deal with that." He's picking up on,"She's trying to get back at me.
- 9:41That's what she's trying to do." The third, which I've seen come up a lot in the comment section here, is unworthiness.
- 9:49And I gotta be honest, this is probably number one.
- 9:52Like, 99% of you are probably dealing with this one, and this again applies to both the wounded maidens and also the awakening warriors.
- 9:59So make sure to take the quiz so you know which one you are.
- 10:03But unworthiness basically states that I'm not good enough in order for a man to provide for me, so I'm gonna ask, but internally I feel really uncomfortable asking for this.
- 10:14Internally I'm afraid he's gonna call me a gold digger.
- 10:17Internally I'm afraid that he's gonna say no.
- 10:20Internally I just honestly don't think I'm good enough for this because I still feel like I have to prove myself in order to be loved, and if I'm not paying bills, then how am I proving myself?
- 10:29How am I proving myself to this man that I am worthy of being loved?
- 10:34So sometimes it really is just an issue of worthiness.
- 10:37Um, whenever I see issues of worthiness, a lot of times it's women with much lower self-esteem.
- 10:43And again, both the awakening warriors and wounded maidens have very low self-esteem.
- 10:48Uh, the awakening warrior just looks competent and capable'cause she is, but on the outside it looks like she has it together, where the wounded maiden is usually a bit more of a hot mess and you can tell more easily.
- 11:00But they both have very low self-esteem, and when you have low self-esteem and you have low self-worth, then if you ask a man to provide for you, something's gonna feel off on his end, right?
- 11:11And again, most men aren't even aware that they are this sensitive, but he's gonna be like,"Mm, I mean something's, something's not right.
- 11:18Something's off.
- 11:19Something's not making sense.
- 11:20My answer is no." That's what's going to go on there.
- 11:23So those women really need to work on feeling worthy of provision, and sometimes, sometimes you need to work on being provided for by something that's bigger than you.
- 11:33I always tell women believe in something bigger than you.
- 11:37Believe in something like the universe, God.
- 11:40We have women from 50 different countries, all kinds of different cultures.
- 11:43Just believe in something bigger than you because if you don't believe that you're worthy of being provided for by a man, fine, but at least we can get you to a point where you feel like you're worthy of being provided for by the cosmos or whatever you want to call it.
- 11:57That's a very good place to start, and that is the best place to start for most people, and then it starts to translate over into other areas of their lives.
- 12:06Now, the fourth block is one that I know very well.
- 12:11Very, very well, and I can tell you for a fact that this is for the awakening warriors, and that is control Control.
- 12:20A lot of women want control because they want to feel safe.
- 12:24They learned at a young age that they had to take care of themselves.
- 12:28They learned at a young age that for whatever reason, they couldn't rely on the people around them.
- 12:32They learned at a young age that they had to protect themselves in this crazy world.
- 12:37If we look at the heroine's journey, this is usually the part of the journey where she starts to over-identify with the masculine.
- 12:44So what this looks like is she's usually a very capable woman, very smart, very intelligent, probably makes a lot of money, um, and but she has to control everything.
- 12:54She's the detail-oriented one.
- 12:56She's the one who n- if she's not in control, she does not feel safe.
- 13:01And the thing is that in order to move up into the stages of divine feminine energy and get men to provide for you, you have to start feeling safe.
- 13:09We have to start working on the feeling of internal safety.
- 13:13So what this looks like is a woman may ask her man to cover the bills, and then he'll shoot back and he'll say,"But you're totally capable.
- 13:20You're, you're capable of paying bills.
- 13:21Why should I have to pay bills?" Now, here's what's going on on the inside.
- 13:25On the inside, she doesn't trust him to actually take care of the bills.
- 13:30On the inside, she's still thinking about when he screwed up paying a bill three years ago.
- 13:34On the inside, she's still thinking that,"Oh my gosh, if I allow him to take over this and I don't have control of this, I'm going to not survive.
- 13:44I'm going to have to be vulnerable, and I'm going to have to let go of control, and I'm going to have to let, uh, allow somebody else to take leadership in this department." So your mouth might be asking him to pay the bills, but internally you don't even trust him to do a good job.
- 13:59That is for my control freaks.
- 14:01And that if that is you, I can tell you as a recovering control freak that this is the one that I've had to work on the most.
- 14:08I was a hypervigilant woman.
- 14:11I was a very high-achieving woman.
- 14:13I spent 15 years probably running myself into the ground high-achieving.
- 14:19I did all the things.
- 14:20I had an almost million-dollar business, Amazon bestselling book.
- 14:23I was on the news.
- 14:24I was doing all the things.
- 14:25But when it came to my relationships, I eventually got to a breaking point, which is where my awakening warriors usually get to.
- 14:31They get to a breaking point where they are tired and they are exhausted.
- 14:36And they don't want to continue taking on this load.
- 14:38They know something is off.
- 14:40But the scariest part for an awakening warrior is to begin to release that control.
- 14:47And in order for your man to provide for you, which is what you desire and what you say you want, it's gonna require you to release control.
- 14:55And here's what he's thinking in the back of his head.
- 14:58He knows that you're a control freak.
- 15:01He knows that you are a total control freak.
- 15:03So in his mind, he's like,"Yeah right, I'm gonna take over the bills, and then maybe I screw something up, and she's gonna blow a gasket and lose her mind.
- 15:10I'm not gonna put myself through that." That's what he's thinking internally.
- 15:15And because all he wants to do is make you happy, he doesn't wanna put himself in a position where he might potentially upset you and awaken the control freak dragon, because the control freak dragon is going to unload on him.
- 15:27So those are the four blocks that...
- 15:30Hidden blocks.
- 15:31Like, nobody even talks about this, which is amazing.
- 15:34But because I've been coaching for 15 years, I can see the patterns.
- 15:38I'm really good at pattern recognition, and these are the four top blocks that I have seen come up over and over and over again when a woman is with a good man.
- 15:46There's nothing that indicates that he's not a good man, but there's a rub around the provision.
- 15:51And she's asking him, and he keeps telling her no.
- 15:54Usually, there's a block in these four areas.
- 15:58So if you're listening to this and you're resonating and you're like,"Oh my God, what do I do next?" The next thing that you have to do is take that free quiz.
- 16:05That free quiz is going to let you know which archetype you fall under.
- 16:10Once you know which archetype you fall under, then you will also receive the resources and the next steps in order to start healing that part of yourself so you can actually get to what I call the conscious queen.
- 16:23Once we start getting to the conscious queen, now we're beginning to integrate.
- 16:27Now we're beginning to release control.
- 16:28Now we've got more self-love.
- 16:30Now we've got better boundaries.
- 16:32But we have to do some work in order to get there.
- 16:36So make sure to go to mindfulsuccesspath.com/quiz.
- 16:40Once again, I will leave it in the description and in the first comment so you can find out which archetype you are.
- 16:46And after you've taken the quiz, let me know in the comments which archetype you got.
- 16:52I hope you guys enjoyed this video.
- 16:54Make sure to share it with a girlfriend if you found it useful.
- 16:58Make sure to subscribe and hit the notification bell if you haven't already, and I will catch you on the next one