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From Artemis to Spanky and The Bandit | Funny News Stories · The Treehouse Show Podcast

0:00
Speaker 1: Want more Treehouse, check out our YouTube exclusive shows at
0:02
Speaker 1: YouTube dot com slash at Treehouse on air.
0:12
Speaker 2: It is time to leave your worries outside and laugh
0:16
Speaker 2: with us inside the Treehouse. I'm Dan ol Mallley, along
0:20
Speaker 2: with Trey Trendholm and Jerry Caldwell. Coming up on today's show.
0:25
Speaker 2: If we get this far, one man's impressive amount of arrests.
0:41
Speaker 2: I don't want to tell you what it is yet
0:42
Speaker 2: because if I tell you how many it is, you'll
0:45
Speaker 2: want to start with that instead. But I want to
0:46
Speaker 2: save that because we have important stuff to get to
0:48
Speaker 2: here today inside the Treehouse. Also, we have information on
0:55
Speaker 2: the I five Flasher, a Michigan escape artist. You have
0:59
Speaker 2: to see to believe. But we are going to start
1:02
Speaker 2: today with a little bit of nostalgia and a little
1:07
Speaker 2: bit of current events all rolled into one big ass rocket.
1:11
Speaker 2: I am talking about our triumphant return to the Moon.
1:17
Speaker 2: The Artemis two rocket is set to blast off as
1:20
Speaker 2: we are recording this on April first. The countdown is
1:25
Speaker 2: on for the Artemis two rocket to go back to
1:27
Speaker 2: the Moon. I believe fly around it and then come
1:32
Speaker 2: back doesn't sound exciting, but it's space travel, which means
1:36
Speaker 2: it's really eff and hard, and I can't Jerry. I
1:41
Speaker 2: love your enthusiasm on this, but I don't know if
1:44
Speaker 2: everyone else is feeling it, because I see it on
1:47
Speaker 2: news coverage and stuff, but I don't feel the excitement.
1:52
Speaker 2: I don't know if it's if it's because all of
1:54
Speaker 2: our attention spans are so shortened nowadays, or there's so
1:58
Speaker 2: much going on that it's hard to focus on one
2:01
Speaker 2: major event because it feels like there's fifty major events
2:05
Speaker 2: all happening everywhere, all at the same damn time. It's
2:09
Speaker 2: hard to be like, yeah, we're going back to the moon. So, Jerry,
2:13
Speaker 2: based on your enthusiastic reaction, you seem to be on
2:16
Speaker 2: board with You're you seem to be very excited about
2:19
Speaker 2: Artemis two going back to the moon. Yes, what about you?
2:24
Speaker 1: I'm thrilled. I mean it is.
2:29
Speaker 2: Sorry, the look on your face said the exact opposite
2:32
Speaker 2: the entire time I'm talking about it.
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Speaker 1: Well, I because you're talking about it, and it kind
2:37
Speaker 1: of in the same way people took the Space Shuttle
2:41
Speaker 1: as routine because we've been there once before. People kind
2:47
Speaker 1: of feel like this is routine, but it's a big
2:50
Speaker 1: deal and it has driven me nuts. Because the last
2:55
Speaker 1: Space Shuttle LA launch was in twenty eleven, so we've
2:57
Speaker 1: been fifteen years essentially without a space program, something that
3:01
Speaker 1: has kind of been a staple of our country since
3:04
Speaker 1: sixty one. And especially when Kennedy you know, said we're
3:08
Speaker 1: going to go to the Moon.
3:11
Speaker 2: And we all thought, man, that president's crazy.
3:14
Speaker 1: Yeah. But and then because but the you know, and
3:19
Speaker 1: even the bigger context is this is the first step
3:23
Speaker 1: to possibly Mars or you know, setting some even setting
3:28
Speaker 1: up some kind of lunar base. So yeah, you know,
3:32
Speaker 1: it's it's a it's a big deal and there's nothing
3:36
Speaker 1: routine about it, and these things can go wrong, and uh,
3:40
Speaker 1: but I'm very much looking forward to it. I I
3:46
Speaker 1: I miss like I Space Shuttle launches were so cool
3:50
Speaker 1: to me.
3:51
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, growing up with them. I'm with you, man,
3:54
Speaker 2: I loved it. My dad was you know, sort of
3:57
Speaker 2: a uh hobby astronomer, and we had one of those big,
4:03
Speaker 2: fat telescopes, you know, like diameter of a Thanksgiving dinner
4:07
Speaker 2: plate kind of a thing, and we'd be in the
4:09
Speaker 2: backyard and being in rural Oklahoma having one of those. Yeah,
4:13
Speaker 2: we saw some stuff. I mean, like we're counting craters
4:17
Speaker 2: on the Moon. I still remember how these comic going by,
4:21
Speaker 2: and I just got chills thinking about it in our
4:24
Speaker 2: backyard with that telescope, there's no ambient light out there.
4:28
Speaker 2: The only interference there was was the occasional coyote howl.
4:32
Speaker 2: And we're just watching how these comet streak across the
4:34
Speaker 2: sky through this telescope and I and again, I mean,
4:37
Speaker 2: it's it's amazing, powerful stuff. And then this, you know,
4:42
Speaker 2: the Shuttle program, everything you're talking about, Trey, all of
4:46
Speaker 2: us watching Space Shuttle launches in school or like key
4:50
Speaker 2: for the Challenger flight, being kept home from schools. My
4:53
Speaker 2: dad and I could watch it together. Obviously I didn't
4:56
Speaker 2: go so well, So yeah, I mean it it's weird
5:00
Speaker 2: because looking at the headlines on the Artemis two launch yesterday,
5:04
Speaker 2: looking at the headlines yesterday for the launch today, I
5:08
Speaker 2: got that nostalgia feeling. It's like, oh, this feels retro,
5:11
Speaker 2: feels kind of cool, but still kind of like there's
5:15
Speaker 2: so much else going on. I don't even I don't
5:17
Speaker 2: even know what time the launch is supposed to be.
5:19
Speaker 2: Three o'clock every time, three okay, three o'clock, three o'clock
5:23
Speaker 2: Dallas time, Like are there are there launch parties. Is
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Speaker 2: anyone like going to the bar or anything and doing
5:31
Speaker 2: Artemis to watch parties or anything, or is it just
5:33
Speaker 2: we're all just gonna watch it on our phone.
5:36
Speaker 3: I haven't made any specific plans because we're busy around here,
5:41
Speaker 3: but see I'm going.
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Speaker 1: I think the other thing that's that's kind of unfair
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Speaker 1: for Artemis is between Bezos's group, Elon Muskin's group, Richard
5:57
Speaker 1: Branson's group. We've seen a lot of launches just not
6:03
Speaker 1: you know, this one is going the distance of you know,
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Speaker 1: lunar orbit and then coming back.
6:09
Speaker 2: And this one, I guess would be considered an official
6:14
Speaker 2: deal because it's NASA. It's not a space X thing,
6:17
Speaker 2: it's not a Blue Dial, Blue Origins whatever, like you said.
6:22
Speaker 2: It's it's an official launch. It's not the private sector, you.
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Speaker 1: Know, right well, and and but most of those are
6:28
Speaker 1: in some way, shape or form in conjunction with NASA.
6:32
Speaker 1: Yeah you know, I mean like NASA is benefiting from
6:35
Speaker 1: the technology from.
6:37
Speaker 4: You know, the private sector.
6:38
Speaker 1: Yeah. Well, it's like everyone. It's like, you know, especially
6:42
Speaker 1: if eat one of Elon Musku's rockets go sideways, like
6:45
Speaker 1: that's expected that you know, they don't expect to launch
6:48
Speaker 1: every time, you know, in the beginning stages, and everything's
6:51
Speaker 1: going to be perfect. There it happens.
6:54
Speaker 4: I know.
6:54
Speaker 2: It's actually funny when you think about it from the
6:56
Speaker 2: scale of dollars invested. As a cun tree, if one
7:01
Speaker 2: of our rockets blows up, we're all like, oh God,
7:03
Speaker 2: how much did that cost? If it's one of Elon's,
7:05
Speaker 2: it's like, he's got it. He's fine. Now, granted there's
7:09
Speaker 2: a big chunk of American dollars that have subsidized his rocket,
7:14
Speaker 2: but it's not entirely ours.
7:16
Speaker 1: Well, just the reusable rocket technology that they've developed is
7:20
Speaker 1: huge and makes it much more affordable.
7:25
Speaker 2: M hm.
7:26
Speaker 3: The rockets on the sides that come down and they
7:29
Speaker 3: land point up on platforms in the ocean.
7:34
Speaker 4: That's beautiful.
7:36
Speaker 2: Oh, it's an outstanding thing. I think that's one of
7:38
Speaker 2: the biggest advancements in you know, space travel technology that
7:42
Speaker 2: have happened this century is being able to bring the
7:46
Speaker 2: rockets back and use them again. It's like, yeah, that's
7:49
Speaker 2: great mm hm. And that was started by the Space Shuttle. Yeah,
7:54
Speaker 2: and you would think having something come home or return
7:59
Speaker 2: to base it sounds simple, but then obviously the execution
8:03
Speaker 2: of it is something very very different. So it's very
8:06
Speaker 2: cool that they're able to do that. Are we getting
8:11
Speaker 2: like a constant live stream of this Artemis two mission?
8:14
Speaker 2: When they how many? How many laps are they doing
8:17
Speaker 2: around the Moon?
8:18
Speaker 1: Do we know?
8:18
Speaker 2: Or is one?
8:20
Speaker 4: I think they're going to orbit the Moon a couple
8:22
Speaker 4: of times.
8:23
Speaker 1: There's I believe there's two different orbits, and then yeah,
8:26
Speaker 1: they're gonna it's not long. I would say a day orbiting. Okay,
8:33
Speaker 1: I haven't looked at the official but I'm quite sure
8:36
Speaker 1: that NASA will be live streaming everything.
8:41
Speaker 3: On NASA Plus streaming service or on their YouTube channel.
8:48
Speaker 2: Okay, when you say NASA Plus, I'm like, God, did
8:50
Speaker 2: they also have a subscription plan? We all have one? Yeah,
8:53
Speaker 2: NASA plus Treehouse Plus.
8:56
Speaker 3: So yeah, the first one is going the first orbit
9:01
Speaker 3: will be practice, uh, getting the system into orbit, and
9:06
Speaker 3: then the second one is for the gravity sling shot
9:09
Speaker 3: back to Earth.
9:12
Speaker 2: I love it when those when those sling shot things
9:14
Speaker 2: that I've seen in movies happen in real life.
9:17
Speaker 1: M hm.
9:19
Speaker 3: And it's also to test the life support system of
9:21
Speaker 3: the Iran spacecraft.
9:22
Speaker 4: Got it.
9:23
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's I just pulled this up from the European
9:26
Speaker 2: Space something and it's yeah, saying something very similar to
9:30
Speaker 2: that that it's about testing off the life spport systems
9:33
Speaker 2: and all that stuff, which is all important. One of
9:35
Speaker 2: the great things about the space travel thing is people
9:37
Speaker 2: so many dumb people bitch and moan about how much
9:40
Speaker 2: it costs just to you know, fly around space. It's like,
9:44
Speaker 2: there are massive benefits and if you you know, dig
9:47
Speaker 2: one line deeper underneath a headline of things, you'll learn
9:52
Speaker 2: about all the advancements in technology that come from space travel.
9:56
Speaker 2: It's not just about flying around going we I mean,
10:01
Speaker 2: that's the reason how we have velcro, it's the reason
10:03
Speaker 2: why we have duct tape. I mean, all these technological
10:07
Speaker 2: advancements happened because we did it in space. And they're like, hey,
10:11
Speaker 2: we can use this at home. Like Tang and I
10:18
Speaker 2: had a list at one point of like all the
10:20
Speaker 2: everyday uses, all the advancements and products and things that
10:24
Speaker 2: have you know, sort of spawn from space exploration, and
10:28
Speaker 2: there's a lot.
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Speaker 1: There's a lot well, and one of the biggest things
10:33
Speaker 1: they're working on that is not I read something that
10:37
Speaker 1: they think they can put it into a test run,
10:40
Speaker 1: but ultimately it's going to be a nuclear powered rocket
10:43
Speaker 1: that you know, so then you won't have the need
10:49
Speaker 1: for refueling.
10:50
Speaker 4: Right, gotcha.
10:53
Speaker 3: It's basically an ion drive that's being powered by uh
11:00
Speaker 3: fusion Core. Basically, we are so smart.
11:05
Speaker 2: I feel like we should do the Companion podcast for NASA.
11:13
Speaker 2: The only downside is is sometimes I'm such Look, look
11:17
Speaker 2: I'm I. I like to think I'm slightly optimistic but
11:22
Speaker 2: operate more as a realist. But I'll be honest with you,
11:26
Speaker 2: there are times that I don't want to be on
11:28
Speaker 2: this planet anymore because I feel like sometimes I'm just
11:31
Speaker 2: surrounded by a bunch of morons. Present company excluded. I
11:36
Speaker 2: easily could have said included.
11:37
Speaker 1: But I did, and I wouldn't.
11:40
Speaker 4: I wouldn't have make argument.
11:42
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, but you guys are among my favorite people.
11:46
Speaker 2: It doesn't matter how stupid we are. We're all friends,
11:48
Speaker 2: so you know, we're we good. But I think we
11:51
Speaker 2: all can kind of relate to that where it's like
11:53
Speaker 2: you look around some days you're just like, am I
11:55
Speaker 2: the only smart one around here? Especially if you're on
11:58
Speaker 2: six thirty five or something. But the other biggest news
12:03
Speaker 2: that I can't get away from today, besides the artemist two.
12:07
Speaker 2: Launch is the is this escape artist that police in
12:14
Speaker 2: Michigan tried to arrest keywords there escape artists police tried
12:22
Speaker 2: to arrest. This is This is an amazing feat. You know,
12:27
Speaker 2: have you ever heard the phrase ninjas don't exist? Yeah,
12:37
Speaker 2: they won't beat the fuck. Look, here's the longer version.
12:43
Speaker 2: Here we go, so hell yeah, I don't know. So
12:47
Speaker 2: here we have Muskegan Heights Police. This woman's just been arrested.
12:50
Speaker 2: She's in the back of this SUV squad car and
12:54
Speaker 2: kind of like a dog. You have the rear passenger
12:57
Speaker 2: window rolled down all most just halfway so she can
13:01
Speaker 2: get some air instead of using it to breathe. She
13:04
Speaker 2: sees that as an escape patch, so she starts to
13:08
Speaker 2: maneuver her way through the window. And so when this
13:11
Speaker 2: video starts, and this guy's recording, what's an excellent play
13:15
Speaker 2: by play, By the way, she's already chest and head out.
13:19
Speaker 2: So she's already got her boobs through the window and
13:21
Speaker 2: into the outside.
13:23
Speaker 4: I don't tell him nothing, I'll say.
13:28
Speaker 2: Now she's shimmying. She looks she looks like a sort
13:32
Speaker 2: of like an inch worm, crawling her way out of
13:36
Speaker 2: this car window, wearing all black.
13:38
Speaker 4: Sweats, I will have a physics question here in just
13:44
Speaker 4: a moment.
13:45
Speaker 2: Fair enough, and keep in mind, I just want to
13:47
Speaker 2: set the stakes here here if if you're not thinking
13:50
Speaker 2: about it, if she she it is a very real
13:54
Speaker 2: possibility that she loses her any sort of core strength,
13:58
Speaker 2: gets tired, and then just falls out of this car
14:01
Speaker 2: window and face plants the concrete beneath. So this is
14:05
Speaker 2: a very dangerous thing. And she's handcuffed behind her back,
14:12
Speaker 2: right right leg is out, right leg is out, and
14:15
Speaker 2: then using the fender, the rear fender, she puts her
14:20
Speaker 2: right foot on the fender for just a little bit.
14:22
Speaker 4: Of less there.
14:25
Speaker 3: What the hell is she hanging on with right there?
14:28
Speaker 3: I think it's a left boobs. I think it is.
14:30
Speaker 2: I think it's her left boob is somehow hanging on
14:32
Speaker 2: to that windows edge, because now she's swinging the left
14:35
Speaker 2: leg out of the car window. Maybe the inside part
14:39
Speaker 2: of her thigh is kind of clenching the top edge
14:43
Speaker 2: of that window. I don't know, because here she looks
14:46
Speaker 2: like like the Karen version of Spider Man. Can I
14:50
Speaker 2: ask one question, Yeah, we're sure this is real, this
14:54
Speaker 2: is from you, This is from USA today. Okay, does
14:57
Speaker 2: anyone not find it funny that there's a bif Alicia
15:00
Speaker 2: sign hanging up top. How did I miss that? Oh
15:05
Speaker 2: my god, look at that? Why Trey, it's B why Felicia?
15:10
Speaker 2: So it's by. This is like maybe she's outside of
15:13
Speaker 2: a hair salon, so like hair by Felicia. Well it's
15:19
Speaker 2: B Why Felicia. I mean you could have gone with
15:21
Speaker 2: B I Felicia. Thank you Trey for pointing that out.
15:23
Speaker 2: That's one of the things I had not noticed yet
15:25
Speaker 2: about this video. That's beautiful, bless you, sir. So here
15:33
Speaker 2: she is and now she's out. I don't know how
15:36
Speaker 2: she's not falling here, because now her entire body is out.
15:40
Speaker 2: It looks like maybe.
15:41
Speaker 1: Her left elbow is giving her just enough leverage.
15:46
Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe it's somehow hanging on that halfway down rear
15:50
Speaker 2: passenger window. And then once her feet hit the concrete,
15:55
Speaker 2: there she goes.
15:58
Speaker 1: This is.
16:00
Speaker 2: Oh and she go running off into the distance down
16:05
Speaker 2: the street, hands behind her back, not a police officer
16:08
Speaker 2: in sight.
16:09
Speaker 4: That is damned impressive.
16:10
Speaker 2: That's oh yeah, yeah, golf clap that.
16:17
Speaker 4: Not not.
16:21
Speaker 1: That? Huh.
16:22
Speaker 3: What I'm just I'm stunned by, first of all, the
16:28
Speaker 3: unmitigated gull to actually like think that maybe I can
16:31
Speaker 3: get away with this, and then she does. And then twice,
16:34
Speaker 3: when you're watching her crawl out of there, she stops
16:36
Speaker 3: and she's looking to see where they are. And one
16:38
Speaker 3: time she sees them a little bit and she just pauses.
16:40
Speaker 3: She's just hanging on the side, just still and waiting
16:44
Speaker 3: for her chances to move. It's like her core stream.
16:49
Speaker 3: You must be able to bounce quarters off her midsection.
16:52
Speaker 2: Man, Yeah, she's probably got some serious workout gear underneath
16:59
Speaker 2: those sweats. A woman who shimmied out the rear window
17:02
Speaker 2: of a police cruiser while handcuffed and then fled over
17:05
Speaker 2: the weekend has been arrested. Muskegon County Prosecutor DJ Hilson
17:10
Speaker 2: identified the suspect, who was rearrested Tuesday as Kendra Ainy,
17:14
Speaker 2: thirty eight years old. A bystander captured cell phoned video
17:18
Speaker 2: on Saturday of a woman climbing from a half opened
17:22
Speaker 2: window of the Muskegon Heights police vehicle while officers looked
17:25
Speaker 2: through an SUV that she had been a passenger in.
17:28
Speaker 2: So I guess while the arresting officers are rummaging through
17:32
Speaker 2: her vehicle conducting their investigation, assuming She's fine and not
17:36
Speaker 2: going anywhere, So to me, this should only be part
17:41
Speaker 2: one of the video. I want to see part two
17:43
Speaker 2: when the officers get back to the car and are
17:45
Speaker 2: looking around, like where's she go. The video, which was
17:51
Speaker 2: posted on social media, showed the woman first poking out
17:53
Speaker 2: her head and upper torso. She then squeezes her legs
17:57
Speaker 2: and feet through, drops to the ground, and runs away
17:59
Speaker 2: along her residential street. Police set in a Facebook post
18:04
Speaker 2: that an officer on patrol saw a vehicle parked outside
18:07
Speaker 2: in abandoned business. I wonder if the abandoned business is
18:10
Speaker 2: the Bye Felicia that Trey noticed. The driver was identified,
18:13
Speaker 2: but the officer was unable to get the identity of
18:15
Speaker 2: the woman at the passenger's seat fingerprints scanner used to
18:18
Speaker 2: confirm who she was. Officer learned she was wanted on
18:20
Speaker 2: a parole violation warrant, so they arrested her. Then she
18:24
Speaker 2: made her getaway as they're looking through the vehicle.
18:30
Speaker 4: Beautiful, that's a crazy bitch.
18:35
Speaker 1: I just pulled up her mugshot. That's a redhead. Crazy.
18:39
Speaker 4: That's it. I'm looking for, oh man.
18:43
Speaker 2: So when I saw this video, I started to wonder, Trey,
18:47
Speaker 2: I know your affection for crazy women. But I also
18:51
Speaker 2: know that you're now in a serious relationship with a lovely,
18:54
Speaker 2: lovely woman. But when you watch this video and you
19:01
Speaker 2: see this crazy woman crawl her away out of a
19:04
Speaker 2: police cruiser while handcuffed, showing amazing body control, be honest,
19:13
Speaker 2: does this turn you on a little bit? Does this
19:16
Speaker 2: give you the flutter? Is your cradar going crazy?
19:23
Speaker 1: If I was single, I'd be on my way, bail
19:34
Speaker 1: pocket going Come on, baby.
19:37
Speaker 2: Just make sure you pack your running shoes.
19:41
Speaker 1: That's in kevlar.
19:42
Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, the protection you really need.
19:49
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Speaker 2: and property review eight three three Cook DFW. That's eight
21:39
Speaker 2: three three Cook DFW or the website cookdfw dot com. Jerry,
21:45
Speaker 2: I know you're going through a hell of a time
21:47
Speaker 2: right now, you and your lovely lady Katie moving into
21:50
Speaker 2: her her father's house has since unfortunately passed away, and
21:54
Speaker 2: you guys have a ton of work that you're in
21:56
Speaker 2: the middle of, trying to clean out the house, doing
21:58
Speaker 2: all those things that you have to do when a
22:00
Speaker 2: loved one, you know, leaves this plane. Have you had
22:05
Speaker 2: your roof checked? Not yet, but it does on the list.
22:10
Speaker 2: I know it gets it. Yeah, it absolutely does. So
22:13
Speaker 2: give give our lovely folks at COOKDFW Roofing Restorational call
22:17
Speaker 2: the look around everything. They'll let you know what you
22:19
Speaker 2: need to do, what maybe you can do later on
22:22
Speaker 2: down the line. No pressure, give you an honest assessment.
22:25
Speaker 2: A three to three cook DFW. All right back inside
22:29
Speaker 2: the Treehouse. I'm Dan, along with Trey and the aforementioned Jerry.
22:33
Speaker 2: We're going to go from going back to the Moon
22:37
Speaker 2: to the back of a police car to one of
22:43
Speaker 2: our newer features Inside the Treehouse, called laugh or Death.
22:49
Speaker 2: Grammatically it's very incorrect, but I don't care because it
22:52
Speaker 2: sounds good and there. I can't think of any other
22:54
Speaker 2: better way to say it yet, and until I do,
22:56
Speaker 2: we're calling this laugh or death. I'm going to tell
22:59
Speaker 2: you guys about that. I'm not going to A news
23:02
Speaker 2: reporter out of Oregon is going to tell you guys
23:05
Speaker 2: about the ifive Flasher. But as you hear this news report,
23:09
Speaker 2: keep in mind, if you laugh, you die.
23:13
Speaker 7: Dubb the ifive flasher, for exposing himself to women while driving,
23:18
Speaker 7: is facing new charges. Oregon State Police arrested Charles Porter
23:22
Speaker 7: last week after a woman says Porter drove up next
23:26
Speaker 7: to her on I five near Woodburn. She says he
23:28
Speaker 7: was watching porn on a tablet, then started masturbating while
23:32
Speaker 7: trying to get her attention.
23:34
Speaker 8: She tried to get away, trying to speed up, and
23:37
Speaker 8: then he's spat up with me. I was trying to
23:40
Speaker 8: slow down.
23:41
Speaker 9: He slowed down with me. I was in the left lane,
23:44
Speaker 9: so it's like I can't really go into the median
23:47
Speaker 9: and there was no way for me to get around
23:50
Speaker 9: his car, and it's like he purposely had me trapped.
23:54
Speaker 7: Porter has multiple convictions of indecent exposure in Washington State
23:58
Speaker 7: and Texas, including one involving a child. He's due back
24:02
Speaker 7: in court this week.
24:05
Speaker 2: All right up until the very end, there am I
24:07
Speaker 2: the only one? Am I the one going to the deepest,
24:10
Speaker 2: darkest corner of hell on this? Because I get about
24:13
Speaker 2: thirty seconds into this and I just stopped. I just
24:15
Speaker 2: start giggling. Because it's bad. It's a serious crime. I
24:21
Speaker 2: understand that. On the flip side, as she's describing the
24:27
Speaker 2: circumstances that happened to this woman on the highway, I
24:30
Speaker 2: can't help but giggle at how ridiculous it is that
24:33
Speaker 2: there's a grown man watching porn while he's driving, going
24:37
Speaker 2: up next to people, going like hell, like that, see that,
24:40
Speaker 2: you see the porn on much look at this now?
24:42
Speaker 4: And I got we we we.
24:43
Speaker 2: And then he's chasing her with it as it's just
24:47
Speaker 2: it sounds like some sort of really jacked up Looney
24:51
Speaker 2: Tunes assault.
24:56
Speaker 1: I have to be honest, I mean, just the it's yes,
25:02
Speaker 1: it's sick and dirty, but it's also impressed. I'm talking about.
25:04
Speaker 3: Multitasking exactly the dude starts in the car jerking off
25:09
Speaker 3: and trying to get her attention.
25:10
Speaker 2: Huh and navigating porn sites.
25:13
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean you might have had that one book marked,
25:16
Speaker 3: you know, I think, yeah, but you still got to
25:18
Speaker 3: hit play.
25:19
Speaker 4: Well, that's true.
25:20
Speaker 2: And if you're trying to show her from the next
25:22
Speaker 2: car over what cool scene you're watching, you're gonna you
25:26
Speaker 2: may have to like move the cursor back a little
25:29
Speaker 2: bit and stuff.
25:34
Speaker 4: It's maybe it's prehensile.
25:41
Speaker 2: Look at it this way. I'm going to replay this, okay,
25:45
Speaker 2: I'm just just the early parts. Or listen to what
25:53
Speaker 2: she says when she's describing the event. Forget the fact
25:57
Speaker 2: that this is one guy in a car and a
25:59
Speaker 2: woman in anther their car. Just imagine this is you
26:03
Speaker 2: and your significant other on a Friday night after a
26:06
Speaker 2: couple of you know, hits of something or a couple
26:09
Speaker 2: of glasses of wine, and you're just feeling silly and
26:12
Speaker 2: a little horny. I mean, who hasn't chased their wife
26:15
Speaker 2: around the house with the weenie out.
26:18
Speaker 7: A man dubbed the Ifi Flasher for exposing himself to
26:21
Speaker 7: women while driving is facing new charges. Oregon State Police
26:26
Speaker 7: arrested Charles Porter last week after a woman says Porter
26:29
Speaker 7: drove up next to her on I five near Woodburn.
26:32
Speaker 7: She says he was watching porn on a tablet, then
26:35
Speaker 7: started masturbating while trying to get her attention.
26:39
Speaker 2: Ah ah, again very bad.
26:42
Speaker 8: But tried to get away, trying to speed up, and
26:47
Speaker 8: then he's spat up with me.
26:49
Speaker 9: I was trying to slow down. He slowed down with me.
26:53
Speaker 9: I was in the left lane, so it's like I
26:55
Speaker 9: can't really go into the median and there was no
26:58
Speaker 9: way for me to get around his car, and it's
27:02
Speaker 9: like he purposely had any trapped.
27:07
Speaker 2: Again, this is bad. However, I also see I also
27:13
Speaker 2: see relationships lash couples videos online a lot where it
27:18
Speaker 2: shows the guys like going up behind their wife and
27:20
Speaker 2: smacking her on the butt and doing all these little
27:23
Speaker 2: flirty things that guys are very very very known for
27:27
Speaker 2: that sometimes women don't like and other times if you
27:29
Speaker 2: didn't do it, they'd be mad. Now, granted, it's different
27:32
Speaker 2: because you have some sort of implied consent there.
27:34
Speaker 4: But.
27:38
Speaker 1: I mean, was the guy like in a miata or
27:42
Speaker 1: is it a self driving tesla or is it you know,
27:45
Speaker 1: his dick so big it's like the autopilot from airplane.
27:48
Speaker 1: It inflates it. It's like.
27:51
Speaker 2: I got this, yeah, because.
27:54
Speaker 1: That's that's a lot.
27:56
Speaker 2: It really is. If it's that big, it should also
27:59
Speaker 2: wear a hat, sunglasses.
28:01
Speaker 1: At least a market or something modic to see the road.
28:06
Speaker 2: You don't what me glare you got? You got the
28:07
Speaker 2: Google waters on?
28:12
Speaker 1: I mean there there is part of me and I say, like,
28:16
Speaker 1: it's just like, all right, hats off to you, because
28:20
Speaker 1: that's a lot.
28:21
Speaker 4: Mm hmmm.
28:23
Speaker 2: I'm with you. So I again again, this is bad.
28:26
Speaker 2: This is bad. Okay, I feel like I disclaimed it enough.
28:28
Speaker 2: Now let's go back into the absolute absurdity of all
28:31
Speaker 2: of this. Let's flip this around on just one one
28:34
Speaker 2: part of it. Let's say you are the one driving
28:38
Speaker 2: and this guy comes up next to you and he's
28:40
Speaker 2: doing all these things. He's like he's somehow managing to
28:43
Speaker 2: show you poring on the tablet as he's as he's
28:45
Speaker 2: spanking it while driving and getting your attention, pointing out like, hey,
28:49
Speaker 2: look at what I'm doing. Look what I got. You
28:51
Speaker 2: want some of this? And if I'm on the receiving
28:55
Speaker 2: into that, I think I might be with you, Trey.
28:57
Speaker 2: I'd be like you know, I've seen a lot of
29:01
Speaker 2: road rage incidents, but I've not seen it in this form.
29:05
Speaker 2: And then I'm going to go down the list. In
29:06
Speaker 2: my head, it's like, that's really impressive how he's doing
29:09
Speaker 2: all those things at the same time while driving.
29:12
Speaker 4: Right, My first thought is.
29:15
Speaker 2: Exactly, I'd like, just pull up your phone and start recording,
29:20
Speaker 2: not so much for evidence, but just so you're like, man, I.
29:22
Speaker 4: Got nobody believe this unless they see it.
29:25
Speaker 2: That's right. This needs to go in the Smithsonian. This
29:29
Speaker 2: guy needs his own exhibit. He's gonna he's kind of
29:33
Speaker 2: into that, so I think it would work.
29:34
Speaker 1: I yeah, I mean it sounds like this guy should
29:37
Speaker 1: have a Vegas residency.
29:42
Speaker 2: It's like that commercial with the guy who had like
29:45
Speaker 2: he's playing like sixteen instruments all at the same time.
29:48
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, at least this guy has to play drums,
29:50
Speaker 1: because you're talking about having four things going at the
29:52
Speaker 1: same time. I mean, it's I mean, let's be honest.
30:02
Speaker 1: I the fact that if you're not at least for me,
30:08
Speaker 1: if I'm you know, spanking the monkey, there's some concentration
30:11
Speaker 1: involved the fact that this guy can do all that
30:14
Speaker 1: and still yeah.
30:16
Speaker 2: No, you're right, because if I'm if I've involved in
30:18
Speaker 2: that activity, I'm kind of focused. Me, I'm kind of
30:21
Speaker 2: I'm living in the moment. Now. The downside of this
30:26
Speaker 2: is while you got a guy watching porn on a tablet,
30:30
Speaker 2: spanking it, trying to get other driver's attention to show
30:34
Speaker 2: them what he's doing. What he's watching all while driving
30:38
Speaker 2: is now completely redefined multitasking to me. So now anytime
30:43
Speaker 2: I'm on LinkedIn and if I happen to see in
30:45
Speaker 2: someone's profile or a job posting that says we need
30:48
Speaker 2: a multitasker, it's like they mean, if I can't do
30:51
Speaker 2: the job while jerking off, then I can't get it.
30:55
Speaker 1: At least it gives Jack of all trades a new meeting.
31:08
Speaker 1: You're in the tree house.
31:10
Speaker 5: Visit us online a Treehouse on air dot com.
31:16
Speaker 1: Do you feel restless and anxious, feel like something's missing
31:18
Speaker 1: in your life? Maybe you just need a little more
31:21
Speaker 1: Treehouse in it. Go to patreon dot com slash Treehouse
31:23
Speaker 1: on Air and check out all the bonus features of
31:26
Speaker 1: subscription offers, including bonus shows, behind the scenes content, special
31:29
Speaker 1: subscriber only live shows, and so much more. That's Patreon
31:33
Speaker 1: dot com slash Treehouse on air. That's p A t
31:36
Speaker 1: R e O in dot com slash Treehouse on Air.
31:42
Speaker 5: You're in the tree house. Visit us online at Treehouse
31:47
Speaker 5: on Air dot com.
31:53
Speaker 2: Well done, well done. On one hand, there are times
31:58
Speaker 2: that I really miss all of us being in the
32:03
Speaker 2: same studio to do the show. On the other hand,
32:06
Speaker 2: doing it remotely from three completely different locations is really
32:10
Speaker 2: convenient most of the time. Today, however, is not one
32:15
Speaker 2: of those days, because as Tara and I are on
32:21
Speaker 2: as Tara and I are on Saint John right now,
32:24
Speaker 2: we're in our crash pad. So I'm inside doing the
32:27
Speaker 2: show with you guys, and she's on the other side
32:29
Speaker 2: of this wall outside on the patio doing her wedding
32:34
Speaker 2: planner work. Calls in a very professional manner, and she
32:38
Speaker 2: had to send me a text, baby, please be a
32:40
Speaker 2: little quieter. You've said jerking it like twelve times awesome,
32:53
Speaker 2: but wait there's more. H I said, sorry, and then
32:59
Speaker 2: she responds between that and the guy outside here hoking.
33:04
Speaker 2: Lougi's not super professional. Now, all I can think of
33:09
Speaker 2: as the person she's on a call with, not being
33:12
Speaker 2: able to see these things, but hearing some guys spitting
33:15
Speaker 2: at another guy say jerking at a bunch and she
33:18
Speaker 2: must have no idea what's going on outside of that camera.
33:24
Speaker 2: So I'm going to do something really irresponsible, and that
33:27
Speaker 2: is I'm going to open up the Celsius Energy Dream.
33:34
Speaker 2: But please help remind me that if we start getting
33:37
Speaker 2: into more tawdry talk to, you know, just try to
33:40
Speaker 2: be a little quiet about it. Us. That being said,
33:48
Speaker 2: let's do some birthdays.
33:55
Speaker 1: Oh that's cool.
33:57
Speaker 2: What flavor you got there? This is oh, just the orange.
34:03
Speaker 2: There's a new one. It's a mango. It's like a
34:05
Speaker 2: mango lemonade or something I think is my new I
34:08
Speaker 2: think it's a mingo lemonade or a mango passion fruit,
34:11
Speaker 2: one of those two or that and the tropical vibe.
34:14
Speaker 2: Those are my favorites, which, by the way, I think
34:18
Speaker 2: the show sometimes will have Celsius ads thrown in it
34:23
Speaker 2: because they're big on digital advertising, and some of the
34:27
Speaker 2: ads I've heard from Celsius, like the ads are actively
34:30
Speaker 2: promoting like too Celsius a day, like one's a woman
34:34
Speaker 2: saying like wake up Celsius, run twelve miles and then
34:39
Speaker 2: later in the day still got to meet the girls
34:41
Speaker 2: to go dancing. A second Celsius and then there's another
34:43
Speaker 2: one with a guy similar situation, where he's talking about
34:47
Speaker 2: having like a morning Celsius in an afternoon Celsius. I
34:50
Speaker 2: can already see Trey's head shaken back and forth because
34:52
Speaker 2: he knows you don't need too Celsius a day, And
34:55
Speaker 2: I'm surprised their attorneys are letting them promote that, because
34:59
Speaker 2: it if you don't know, you need to look at
35:02
Speaker 2: the label of the energy drink you're drinking, because Celsius
35:06
Speaker 2: has like three times as much caffeine as a monster.
35:11
Speaker 1: I a huge fan of Celsius, but I can't drink
35:16
Speaker 1: I can't drink him anymore because, yeah, especially you do
35:19
Speaker 1: you do two today? Holy crap?
35:21
Speaker 4: No, I drink half a can? I am good? I
35:24
Speaker 4: am so good.
35:25
Speaker 2: Yeah that's really all you need. But yeah, usually I
35:30
Speaker 2: only I usually only have one when I just like
35:34
Speaker 2: need it, or like today, it's just like I'm just
35:38
Speaker 2: kind of craving like a carbonaviord Carbonavid Jesus, maybe I
35:42
Speaker 2: shouldn't drink it, a carbonated tasty beverage if you know.
35:45
Speaker 1: Do you know what's funny? A complete side note because
35:49
Speaker 1: this was I can't even remember if we ever talked
35:50
Speaker 1: about this on the show. But uh so, I had
35:54
Speaker 1: never had a Seltzer white Claw truly anything like that.
35:57
Speaker 1: Then White Claw came out with a zero alcohol one
36:03
Speaker 1: that actually has electrolytes and everything else. Incredibly refreshing, kind
36:08
Speaker 1: of nice, right, Yeah, I mean, I don't get I
36:15
Speaker 1: understand why they'd be very popular around the pool, especially
36:17
Speaker 1: with girls. Everything else a lot better than beer. Totally
36:20
Speaker 1: get that. Why people were, you know, waiting in line
36:26
Speaker 1: for them. No, they're not that great, but nothing.
36:30
Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, I'm with you there. Yeah, that's that's a
36:33
Speaker 2: little more than that's a little farther than I would go.
36:37
Speaker 2: But yeah, the White Claw, the Seltzers, a lot of
36:40
Speaker 2: them are actually really really tasty.
36:44
Speaker 4: It's very reminiscent of thirty years ago with Zema.
36:49
Speaker 2: Yeah, but even thirty years ago, the like those drinks
36:52
Speaker 2: like Zema and smirnoff Ice, smearnoff Ice actually kind of
36:55
Speaker 2: went mainstream for a little bit. Zema was always kind
36:58
Speaker 2: of an offshoot that people would still kind of turn
37:00
Speaker 2: their nose up at. It was great for girls, it was.
37:03
Speaker 2: It was a high school kids, high school girl beverage
37:06
Speaker 2: kind of thing. But those didn't hit the mainstream the
37:11
Speaker 2: way that these seltzers have, man, I mean every every
37:14
Speaker 2: company has a seltzer, Like all the bud all the
37:18
Speaker 2: all the beer companies, Budweiser, they all have. They all
37:21
Speaker 2: feel the need to have a seltzer in addition to
37:23
Speaker 2: their beer line. I'm assuming it's the same in Texas
37:29
Speaker 2: as it is here in the Islands, because in the
37:30
Speaker 2: Islands we're kind of at the forefront of h relaxing
37:34
Speaker 2: beverages because it's a vacation place, right the sun Cruisers
37:41
Speaker 2: or what's the other It's like the it's like the
37:45
Speaker 2: tea meat Seltzer's. It's not Mike's hard lemonade. It's it's
37:49
Speaker 2: not the it's kind of like the iced tea drinks
37:51
Speaker 2: with the sun stuff on the can. Mm hmmm. Does
37:55
Speaker 2: that sound familiar at all to you guys? Yeah, cruise
37:58
Speaker 2: and now that's rum.
38:01
Speaker 4: No.
38:01
Speaker 2: These these are like tea based summer seltzer with tea
38:05
Speaker 2: and some are just like flat tea. But it's like
38:07
Speaker 2: a raspberry lemonade, you know. Different. No, I'm really surprised
38:13
Speaker 2: you guys haven't.
38:13
Speaker 4: Heard this sun Cruiser iced tea vodka.
38:17
Speaker 2: Yep, Okay, yeah, those things are huge here. In fact,
38:22
Speaker 2: I was picking up breakfast yesterday and one of the
38:24
Speaker 2: boat captains we know he came in went straight to
38:28
Speaker 2: the refrigeration. This is at nine am, went straight to
38:30
Speaker 2: the refrigerator, grabbed a sun Cruiser, popped it and just
38:33
Speaker 2: started and just sat there and drank it while he
38:35
Speaker 2: was waiting for the line to go down so he
38:36
Speaker 2: could order breakfast. We have a lot of alcoholics here
38:41
Speaker 2: as well. Anyway, The sun Cruiser, like the iced tea
38:45
Speaker 2: vodka things are very popular here. Okay, Trey, we hit
38:49
Speaker 2: me with a new sounder again, please show. This episode
38:56
Speaker 2: will drop Thursday, April second, two thousand twenty six, so
39:00
Speaker 2: that is the date of the birthdays that we will
39:04
Speaker 2: share with you today, turning sixty five years old today.
39:07
Speaker 2: Christopher Maloney from Law and Order SVU fame. If you
39:13
Speaker 2: have never seen Christopher Maloney in anything silly, because he's
39:18
Speaker 2: mostly known for his dramatic stuff on SVU, go watch
39:22
Speaker 2: any comedy that he is in.
39:24
Speaker 4: He is hysterical.
39:26
Speaker 1: I saw one with him, and now I'm drawing a
39:28
Speaker 1: blank on which one it was.
39:29
Speaker 2: But yeah, you're is it wet, hot American summer where
39:33
Speaker 2: it's like all these adult people at camp and he's
39:36
Speaker 2: like the camp Cook. I think that was it. I
39:39
Speaker 2: saw that on Netflix.
39:40
Speaker 1: No, it was something so good.
39:44
Speaker 2: Veep. It's Veep. I know you watched Veep, didn't you.
39:47
Speaker 1: No, No, this was some It was a random movie.
39:51
Speaker 1: It was like him and he was like a detective.
39:53
Speaker 1: But there was I can't remember if he was like
39:55
Speaker 1: an animated it was like something he could only see,
40:01
Speaker 1: but it was. It was funny.
40:06
Speaker 2: Trust me on this. Go watch anything comedy that has
40:09
Speaker 2: Christopher Maloney in it. He is really really good. And
40:12
Speaker 2: if you've watched Veep, he plays the Veep Julia Luis
40:16
Speaker 2: Dreyfus's personal trainer, slash Lover for a handful of episodes.
40:21
Speaker 2: Really really good. Oh, this is one of my favorite
40:24
Speaker 2: birthdays to read. Clark Greg is sixty four years old.
40:29
Speaker 2: Clark greg is famous for a few different things. Number one,
40:32
Speaker 2: Jerry you probably know him best and Trey you as
40:35
Speaker 2: well as Agent Colson in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Okay.
40:40
Speaker 2: He's also famous now for being the ex husband of
40:44
Speaker 2: Jennifer Gray of Dirty Dancing fame. They were married for
40:47
Speaker 2: a very long time and actually they just recently got divorced,
40:50
Speaker 2: like the last couple of years and One of my
40:53
Speaker 2: favorite did you knows about Clark Greg is that he's
40:58
Speaker 2: a very well rounded talent. Did you ever see the
41:00
Speaker 2: movie What Lies Beneath with Harrison Ford and Michelle Pfeiffer.
41:07
Speaker 1: Yes, the Frozen Pond or there.
41:11
Speaker 2: Is a boat in some water involved in a drowning. Yeah,
41:14
Speaker 2: so it's the one where he's cheating on Michelle Pfeiffer
41:16
Speaker 2: with a student of his and then he kills her
41:20
Speaker 2: and then she starts haunting things. Anyway, Clark Greg wrote
41:25
Speaker 2: that movie and that was That was like the early
41:30
Speaker 2: two thousands, So Clark Greg wrote that movie then went
41:33
Speaker 2: on to become Agent Coulson, all while being married to
41:36
Speaker 2: Jennifer Gray. The dude has it going on. There was
41:43
Speaker 2: something else on that as well. Now I'm brain farting it,
41:47
Speaker 2: but happy birthday to Clark Greg sixty four years old today.
41:51
Speaker 2: Michael Fastpender is forty nine. This is another one of
41:55
Speaker 2: those guys known for a ton of things X Men
41:58
Speaker 2: that he's Magneto in the Offshore of X Men. He
42:02
Speaker 2: was also I think he was in the movie Hung
42:04
Speaker 2: or something like that, or because he apparently he's massively endowed.
42:10
Speaker 2: He was also the blonde Spartan in three hundred. He's
42:14
Speaker 2: the one that says when the Xerxes emissaries says, our
42:19
Speaker 2: arrows will blot out the sun. Michael Fassbender's character's responses,
42:23
Speaker 2: then we'll fight in the shade. Jesus Christ, I know
42:26
Speaker 2: too much stuff. Jesse Plemons is thirty eight. Do you
42:29
Speaker 2: know who he is?
42:32
Speaker 1: I recognize the name, but I can't.
42:35
Speaker 2: Okay, did you see the newer movie from a twenty
42:38
Speaker 2: four Studios called Civil War with Kirsten Dunst. Okay, did
42:44
Speaker 2: you see Jungle Cruise with the Rock and Emily Blunt. Yes,
42:50
Speaker 2: he was the German guy. He was the bad guy.
42:54
Speaker 2: That's Jesse Plemons. He's also married to Kirsten Dunst. They
42:59
Speaker 2: live in Tech because he's from Texas, like like north
43:03
Speaker 2: and like west of thirty five, like in weird parts
43:06
Speaker 2: of Texas, like they pop up in like Stephenville or something.
43:10
Speaker 2: Sometimes he's also the bad guy in the movie I
43:14
Speaker 2: told you to see Trey called Begonia. Oh that's the
43:20
Speaker 2: other thing I was going to say about what lies
43:21
Speaker 2: beneath Trey. If Brandy has not seen What Lies beneath,
43:25
Speaker 2: highly recommended. That's a great, great, great scary, but not
43:29
Speaker 2: a slasher movie. So it's a good date night movie.
43:34
Speaker 2: And same for you, Jerry So Jesse Pleman's thirty eight
43:37
Speaker 2: years old. Dion Sanders is fifty nine today.
43:44
Speaker 1: Is he still coaching?
43:46
Speaker 2: I don't know. I think so. I think so. It's
43:52
Speaker 2: weird because he's one of those guys. I don't follow
43:54
Speaker 2: sports as closely as I used to, but when I do,
43:57
Speaker 2: when I like, if I'm at the gym and I'm
43:59
Speaker 2: looking up at the TV or something and I see, like,
44:01
Speaker 2: what's going on on the sports channel, I usually around
44:04
Speaker 2: this time of year see something about Dion maybe taking
44:06
Speaker 2: an NFL job or maybe not. I don't think there's
44:09
Speaker 2: any talk of that right now. But no, there was
44:12
Speaker 2: last year.
44:13
Speaker 1: Well, when he first came to Colorado and he obviously
44:18
Speaker 1: brought great talent with him, and all of a sudden
44:21
Speaker 1: everyone was like, oh my god. And then they started
44:24
Speaker 1: off great and then just kind of fizzled out. And
44:27
Speaker 1: then last year without and I forget the other kid's name,
44:33
Speaker 1: but obviously his son Shador, but they have the the
44:37
Speaker 1: kid that was the two way player. Uh, that's just
44:41
Speaker 1: one of it was just amazing athletes. But yeah, I'm
44:48
Speaker 1: college coaching is a lot of work, not just it's
44:54
Speaker 1: not football recruiting being one, and he doesn't like recruiting,
44:58
Speaker 1: and he's far more tries to do it through the
45:00
Speaker 1: transfer portal and just doesn't seem like he can do it.
45:04
Speaker 3: He is still currently coaching at the University of Colorado Boulder.
45:08
Speaker 2: Yeah, the to be a successful college football coach, you
45:13
Speaker 2: can't just be a good football coach. You also have
45:16
Speaker 2: to be a really good salesman. And one could argue
45:20
Speaker 2: that you would probably need to be a better salesman
45:23
Speaker 2: than you need to be a football coach.
45:25
Speaker 1: Oh, you you need to be. Mac Brown is the
45:30
Speaker 1: ultimate example of good football coach, not great, but great
45:36
Speaker 1: CEO of the football program. And and you know, parents
45:44
Speaker 1: loved them, kids loved him, and he had a way.
45:51
Speaker 2: I want your instant reaction to this information I'm going
45:56
Speaker 2: to share with you. If I was to tell you
46:00
Speaker 2: a man in Washington State has been arrested ninety eight times,
46:04
Speaker 2: what's your reaction.
46:13
Speaker 1: There's a big problem with our justice system.
46:18
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, I'm kind of with you. When I
46:20
Speaker 2: first saw a headline like man arrested for ninety eighth time,
46:24
Speaker 2: I thought that has to be a typo or this
46:26
Speaker 2: has to be a fake story. There's no way this
46:29
Speaker 2: can be real. I have verified this on no less
46:31
Speaker 2: than fifteen news sites. Thurston County, Washington, a Thurston County
46:40
Speaker 2: man was in jail Monday after being arrested for the
46:43
Speaker 2: ninety eighth time. The sheriff says to man is a
46:47
Speaker 2: four time convicted criminal with twenty seven prior misdemeanors. This
46:53
Speaker 2: guy's got a pretty good attorney. This time, he allegedly
46:57
Speaker 2: led officers on a high speed chase through Olympia, Washington,
47:00
Speaker 2: after stealing thousands of dollars worth of merchandise from multiple stores.
47:04
Speaker 2: Deputy say the man and a woman in the truck
47:07
Speaker 2: with him were also involved in a theft just three
47:09
Speaker 2: days prior, where they were not apprehended, so they're on
47:12
Speaker 2: a spree. On the night of the man's ninety eighth arrest,
47:17
Speaker 2: deputies spotted the truck heading north on I five Hey
47:20
Speaker 2: another I five reference it's two on one show in Olympia,
47:24
Speaker 2: and before even activating their emergency lights, the truck started
47:27
Speaker 2: to speed off. Deputies chased after him, but quickly stopped
47:30
Speaker 2: after an unsuccessful pit maneuver as the trucks as the
47:33
Speaker 2: truck sped into downtown Olympia. The truck began blowing through
47:38
Speaker 2: intersections into Lacey, Washington. Deputy say, so they called off
47:42
Speaker 2: the chase out of safety concerns for the public. A
47:45
Speaker 2: short time later, the truck was found abandoned, and so
47:48
Speaker 2: deputyes say they quickly found the pair walking in the neighborhood.
47:52
Speaker 2: Both suspects taken into custody at gunpoint. And then it
47:58
Speaker 2: gets better. Just when you thought being arrested ninety eight
48:03
Speaker 2: times couldn't get any stranger, it does. While searching the
48:09
Speaker 2: suspects truck, deputies say they found thousands of dollars worth
48:13
Speaker 2: of stolen merchandise from numerous businesses. Additionally, the suspect had
48:18
Speaker 2: and I quote, a custom bong built into the dash
48:22
Speaker 2: of the truck so he could comfortably smoke drugs while driving.
48:25
Speaker 4: A man.
48:26
Speaker 2: I mean, that's bad, but but I mean a tip
48:32
Speaker 2: tip of the hat to use there. I mean, look,
48:35
Speaker 2: if you've been arrested ninety eight times and you're not
48:38
Speaker 2: in prison, why the fuck wouldn't you have a car
48:42
Speaker 2: bong right there in the dash.
48:44
Speaker 1: It clearly it has a sign like he's on any
48:46
Speaker 1: form of probation because usually there's drug testing involved.
48:50
Speaker 2: Again, I need to know who this guy's lawyer is,
48:53
Speaker 2: because that's the guy I want doing anything ever, if
48:56
Speaker 2: I ever get arrested for anything, because my god.
49:02
Speaker 3: That that I mean. Go for your goals, man. Everybody
49:07
Speaker 3: wants to be known for something. I tried to do
49:10
Speaker 3: all of them in one as opposed to doing multiples.
49:13
Speaker 3: You know, I had twenty two moving violations, acting all
49:16
Speaker 3: at once, many of which had gone to warrant when
49:18
Speaker 3: I got picked up a couple of hundred gallons of
49:21
Speaker 3: legos in the trunk of the car that I got
49:23
Speaker 3: pulled over in. You know, you just I was just
49:26
Speaker 3: trying to do all of it at once. But you can,
49:30
Speaker 3: I guess, you.
49:31
Speaker 4: Know, try and do it that way.
49:35
Speaker 2: You're a you're a you're a lego felon. I mean
49:39
Speaker 2: they were mine, I owned them. Oh okay, hey, Sorge,
49:45
Speaker 2: we got we got a weirdo here. He's got a
49:46
Speaker 2: bunch of legos in the back.
49:48
Speaker 3: When he opened the trunk and looked in there and
49:50
Speaker 3: saw the legos in the back, everything the whole situation
49:53
Speaker 3: softened immediately, And.
49:56
Speaker 2: He was lucky it softened because you step on one
49:58
Speaker 2: of those legos one time and you'll you'll register those
50:01
Speaker 2: as deadly weapons.
50:02
Speaker 4: Oh I know.
50:07
Speaker 1: So if the guy gets to one hundred arrest, does
50:10
Speaker 1: he win something?
50:11
Speaker 4: Right? I think he card?
50:13
Speaker 2: Yeah, No, I think Trey's right. I think would you
50:15
Speaker 2: because he's he's going to get it. He's going to
50:18
Speaker 2: get it. It's clear it has to be.
50:19
Speaker 4: A goal, right.
50:21
Speaker 3: Has someone contacted the Guinness Book of World Records team?
50:25
Speaker 4: Have we?
50:28
Speaker 2: I mean, look, it varies by state, and I don't
50:33
Speaker 2: know all of what his arrests have been for, let
50:36
Speaker 2: alone all of his convictions. It said before it was
50:39
Speaker 2: twenty seven misdemeanors that he's actually got on his record
50:42
Speaker 2: out of ninety eight arrests. But like, if you have
50:48
Speaker 2: it's like the three strikes you're out rule, right, Like
50:50
Speaker 2: in Texas if you get three d uys and like
50:52
Speaker 2: you're in prison pretty much for life. I think there's
50:56
Speaker 2: a similar law at the federal level. If you do
50:58
Speaker 2: something three times thing off to prison you go pretty
51:01
Speaker 2: much forever. But you know, state laws are very different.
51:06
Speaker 2: But to break the law ninety eight times, well, to
51:08
Speaker 2: be suspected of breaking the law ninety eight times, being
51:11
Speaker 2: arrested ninety eight times and they only they only hung
51:16
Speaker 2: something on him like twenty eight percent. That's a great
51:19
Speaker 2: percentage man, that.
51:26
Speaker 1: I've I mean feels like a state might want to
51:31
Speaker 1: look at their laws and go, we might have might
51:34
Speaker 1: need to tighten these.
51:35
Speaker 4: Loopholes a little bit.
51:38
Speaker 2: This guy sure can thread a needle. Yeah, the sheriff says.
51:43
Speaker 2: The driver is a four time convicted felon for numerous thefts,
51:46
Speaker 2: twenty seven prior misdemeanor convictions, and ninety seven prior arrests.
51:52
Speaker 2: And then earlier this week he was back in jail
51:54
Speaker 2: for the ninety eighth time, this time on charges of
51:57
Speaker 2: dui eluding and possession enough narcotics. You know what, based
52:02
Speaker 2: on these charges, I feel like this this might keep
52:05
Speaker 2: him from making it to one hundred arrests because he
52:07
Speaker 2: may be he may be away for a very very
52:10
Speaker 2: long time. Oh wait, hang on next paragraph. Deputies say,
52:13
Speaker 2: once he's released from Thurston County Jail, he'll face charges
52:16
Speaker 2: for why why are they letting him out?
52:20
Speaker 4: Well, he's clearly not a flight risk.
52:24
Speaker 2: Well not not if you give him back his car.
52:26
Speaker 4: Bong.
52:28
Speaker 1: I think you've got to put him and and and
52:31
Speaker 1: and the the freeway spanker, the I five Flasher Uh
52:38
Speaker 1: huh yeah, I mean just the dynamic duo.
52:43
Speaker 2: It really is just terrorizing. The I five corridor through
52:48
Speaker 2: Washington and the entire Pacific Northwest on I five is
52:53
Speaker 2: just riddled with their crimes. Between the I five Flasher
52:58
Speaker 2: and the I five bong Rip.
53:01
Speaker 3: Yeah, oh yeah, man, they need to do like some
53:05
Speaker 3: live stream collab stuff and just.
53:09
Speaker 2: Yeah, this at the start of a gang. This is
53:15
Speaker 2: like Sons of Anarchy.
53:16
Speaker 1: I five Spanky and the bandit.
53:20
Speaker 4: Yes, he's bounded down, baby.
53:31
Speaker 2: Uh my heart is full of joy and pride Tray speaking. Well,
53:39
Speaker 2: I know what I'm doing this weekend. I'm gonna work
53:41
Speaker 2: on a T shirt. Oh that's not where I thought
53:43
Speaker 2: you were going with that. Where did you think I
53:47
Speaker 2: was going? Pacific Northwest? Oh wow? Oh man? All right
53:53
Speaker 2: for all thanks Treehouse, Treehouse on air dot com. If
53:57
Speaker 2: you enjoyed this as much as we did, do this
53:59
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54:02
Speaker 2: platform and send this show to everyone you know, and
54:05
Speaker 2: together we can grow the Treehouse show. Look at me,
54:09
Speaker 2: I'm a poet. We'll see you next time right here
54:11
Speaker 2: inside the Treehouse. Spanky