Latest / Curiously Guided Podcast / Ep.60 | How to Embrace Authenticity (And Not Roll Your Eyes) with Shay & Mariah

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Ep.60 | How to Embrace Authenticity (And Not Roll Your Eyes) with Shay & Mariah · Curiously Guided Podcast

• 1:10
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, welcome back to the Curiously Guided Podcast, the place for intuitive business owners and curious minds.
• 1:17
  SPEAKER_01: We're your host, Shay Mariah, and today we're excited to be sharing with you the season finale of season three of our podcast.
• 1:27
  SPEAKER_01: We are here at the end of our recording schedule for the third um iteration of what this podcast is.
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_01: And Mariah and I have just been kind of going through the episodes we had this season and reflecting on, you know, where we've come personally in our lives and in our businesses, and also just how the podcast has evolved and where it's come.
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_01: We've had a lot of really cool growth, especially through season three that we're excited about.
• 1:52
  SPEAKER_01: And then we're also finding ourselves kind of trying to predict the future and look ahead.
• 1:56
  SPEAKER_01: So in this episode, our goal is to really just share with you guys some of the bigger takeaways and themes that have come out of this season for us.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_01: Um, both like I mentioned in terms of our personal businesses, but um from what we heard from guests on the podcast, there have been some really clear lessons and takeaways that Mariah and I have kind of been simmering with.
• 2:16
  SPEAKER_01: And um just want to have a little bit more of like a casual open conversation with y'all today about.
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_01: So yeah, with that in mind, you know, I was just sharing with Mariah before we press record.
• 2:26
  SPEAKER_01: I'm ending this season feeling really proud of us and really just excited about the future of this podcast.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_01: Um, we this season in particular have seen a ton of growth in our audience, and we are so grateful for you guys.
• 2:40
  SPEAKER_01: And we're getting a lot of love from you guys, just that you're liking the topics and you're going on the binge.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_01: And so I can't tell you how much we appreciate that and how much we're looking forward to continuing to grow with y'all, um, even into season four.
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_01: So throughout this past season, you know, behind the scenes, Mariah and I have kind of been on this journey.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_01: It's interesting we always laugh because like it feels like what we're going through in our businesses, we're kind of going through together.
• 3:03
  SPEAKER_01: And I would say this past season has been kind of um like a coming back home for both Mariah and I, where we really were um maybe beforehand in more of an experimental phase.
• 3:15
  SPEAKER_01: We were trying out new new ideas, new services.
• 3:17
  SPEAKER_01: We weren't exactly sure like how we wanted to serve to, you know, Mariah fully stepping back into SEO consultant and me fully stepping back into sales consultant and really owning kind of like our zones of genius and our strength.
• 3:32
  SPEAKER_01: So um I am ending this season, you know, professionally, just in a really solid place.
• 3:37
  SPEAKER_01: I I have a new consulting gig.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_01: I love it.
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_01: It's really um, I'm doing well in it.
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_01: It's really satisfying for me, like professionally.
• 3:45
  SPEAKER_01: I feel like it's using my skills in all the right way.
• 3:47
  SPEAKER_01: And it's also allowing me to have enough space to do some coaching and do this kind of stuff on the side.
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_01: So I am um in a really good spot.
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm really happy that, you know, Mariah and I have done a lot of work in terms of exploring our human design and exploring our spirituality and exploring astrology and tarot and all of these different kinds of self-awareness tools.
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_01: And through that, I really came to realize like where my true authentic zone of genius is, what I really am here to do in this life, um, and then how I can bring that through in my work, which is kind of the whole reason why we started this podcast.
• 4:23
  SPEAKER_01: So I am just feeling like I'm very excited about I guess that new level of self-awareness.
• 4:30
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm excited about where it's headed.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_01: And also I'm just feeling proud of myself for kind of authentically embracing what it is that I'm here to do and like showing up and starting to talk about that.
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_01: You know, this season, Mariah and I both interviewed each other in our zones of geniuses.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_01: I interviewed her about SEO and she interviewed me about sales.
• 4:49
  SPEAKER_01: And I've now been on a few other podcasts talking about ethical sales and what that looks like.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_01: And um, it's just really cool to finally feel like the words starting to come together and the thoughts starting to form.
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm starting to get really concrete ideas about what this looks like moving forward.
• 5:05
  SPEAKER_01: So yeah, I'm just kind of um sitting here, it's the beginning of May for us, you know, like summer's coming.
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_01: I'm feeling this new wave of energy and um just really excited to be a little bit more uh solid in like what I am here to do and what I'm doing.
• 5:21
  SPEAKER_01: How does that all land with you?
• 5:23
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I feel like what keeps coming through for me as you're talking is just like how powerful it truly is to have space to verbalize, to rationalize.
• 5:37
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that like that's what's been really helpful for me and you on our own journeys, but also like with this podcast, we've talked about it before.
• 5:44
  SPEAKER_00: When we first got started, we were shaking in our fucking boots.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_00: Like it was like real, I was like, oh fuck, I need like a full script.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_00: I don't want to say anything off script.
• 5:52
  SPEAKER_00: I'm horrified.
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_00: What if I say something?
• 5:54
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna get canceled.
• 5:55
  SPEAKER_00: You know what I mean?
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_00: Like all of these fears that come up.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_00: And so we've been able to kind of work through that in our own right.
• 6:03
  SPEAKER_00: But I think that we've also been able to see that same power kind of get translated to the people that we interview.
• 6:11
  SPEAKER_00: And I do think that part of our zones of genius are like being able to ask good questions and being able to hold space for people to share what's coming up for them.
• 6:22
  SPEAKER_00: And we see through these interviews how powerful it is to ask good questions and to give people the space to verbalize, to rationalize.
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_00: Like, guys, we can't tell you how many people we've stopped recording and they were like, holy fuck, this interview did not go where I thought it was gonna go.
• 6:40
  SPEAKER_00: It went even better.
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_00: It was so good.
• 6:43
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you so much for asking good questions.
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_00: We've gotten like, I've never heard a question like that.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_00: And me and Shay are looking at each other and we're just like, what do you mean?
• 6:50
  SPEAKER_00: Like, if you're curious about the topic that this person is talking about, how do you not get to the place that we got to?
• 6:57
  SPEAKER_00: So it's it's nice to be able to now have in hindsight three seasons behind us of just like we're doing, we're doing cool shit.
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_00: And like we're we're also getting the feedback from you guys listening that like thank you so much for pulling back the curtain.
• 7:18
  SPEAKER_00: Like, thank you so much for being able to have these transparent conversations.
• 7:21
  SPEAKER_00: And I think what you guys can truly feel is like our passion and how much we give a shit about curiosity.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_00: And I've learned that like you can't fake curiosity, you can't fake being curious about something.
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_00: You either are or you're not.
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_00: There's very little gray area with it.
• 7:40
  SPEAKER_00: You either want to know more about what this person is doing and just like how they've uncovered and behind the scenes, or you don't.
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that there is a power in stepping deeper into that and kind of like you said, of just like the self-awareness, the verbalize to rationalize has also then allowed us to ask ourselves better questions, which then allows us to kind of be able to dive deeper into what it means to be us.
• 8:08
  SPEAKER_00: And I mean, how many, how many podcast episodes do we have where we're just like like sticking our pitchfork in something?
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_00: We're like, this is what we're doing now.
• 8:16
  SPEAKER_00: And then like three episodes later, we're like, we're actually interested in this, and now we're interested in that.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_00: And like, that's it.
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_00: We don't have to like stick with one thing.
• 8:24
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I can be interested in a fuck ton of things, and like that's perfectly fine.
• 8:29
  SPEAKER_00: But I think that there is always some kind of thread that kind of ties them all together, or it's like they're related to a certain season or a certain lesson that we have to learn.
• 8:40
  SPEAKER_00: So, yeah, I don't even know where I'm going with this, but that's where I'm at.
• 8:44
  SPEAKER_01: No, I love it.
• 8:45
  SPEAKER_01: And it's funny, ever since we started this podcast, I feel like I keep seeing the idea of curiosity.
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_01: Like curiosity seems to be the answer for most things.
• 8:53
  SPEAKER_01: And I keep, oh, curiosity is the answer.
• 8:55
  SPEAKER_01: Bring more curiosity to it.
• 8:57
  SPEAKER_01: You know, it's crazy how just this simple idea of being curious and staying curious can have such a profound impact, not only on our lives, but now we're seeing it in the people that we're interviewing.
• 9:09
  SPEAKER_01: And Mariah's right, we finish almost every single recording, and our guests tell us, like, wow, I have never thought about it like that before.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_01: No one's ever asked me those things before, no one's ever gotten that deep with me before.
• 9:21
  SPEAKER_01: Now I'm so inspired.
• 9:22
  SPEAKER_01: And we'll, you know, we are having guests like buying domain names for new ideas and, you know, like um starting new programs and whatever, all from these open conversations that start with curiosity.
• 9:34
  SPEAKER_01: So I am myself, like, obviously, we love the idea of curiosity.
• 9:37
  SPEAKER_01: We named our podcast about it, but like I'm finding myself falling more and more in love with this idea of curiosity and what it truly means to be curious, like in every moment of your life.
• 9:47
  SPEAKER_01: And it's been really cool to watch that unfold.
• 9:50
  SPEAKER_01: So I love that you're bringing that up.
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_01: And you know, Mariah and I were kind of asking ourselves, because we're curious bitches, um, you know, what are the big themes that have come through?
• 10:00
  SPEAKER_01: Like, what if we notice?
• 10:01
  SPEAKER_01: We're we're talking with a lot of what I would call like high performers, just people that are in this space, really at the top of their game.
• 10:08
  SPEAKER_01: And like Mariah just said, they're pivoting constantly.
• 10:11
  SPEAKER_01: They're listening to their audience, they have a true curious mindset, they're listening and they're making changes based on the data points that they get in.
• 10:19
  SPEAKER_01: And one thing I was talking with Mariah about is I've noticed after we ask, we're talking with all of these people and we're asking them, you know, like, what is it?
• 10:27
  SPEAKER_01: What's the secret?
• 10:28
  SPEAKER_01: Like, what what have you noticed among all the people you're meeting and in yourself?
• 10:33
  SPEAKER_01: What was the the click, you know, like what really took it over the edge for you?
• 10:37
  SPEAKER_01: And we keep getting one consistent answer, and that's um when I allowed myself to be truly authentic, or when I allowed myself to truly show up as myself.
• 10:47
  SPEAKER_01: Or out of all the people I've ever interviewed, the people that are at the top of their game, it's because they show up truly as themselves.
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_01: They've allowed themselves to take off the mask and be truly authentic.
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_01: And in that idea, we hear it a lot.
• 11:01
  SPEAKER_01: It I think to me, when I first hear it, I'm kind of like, uh, well, that's kind of fluffy language, you know.
• 11:07
  SPEAKER_01: But I do think there is something, you know, we're hearing it over and over again that the people at the top of their games are taking off the masks and letting themselves be seen.
• 11:15
  SPEAKER_01: And that's certainly the work for me.
• 11:18
  SPEAKER_01: And um, the idea of not being so guarded, the idea of can I really is it safe to show up truly as myself?
• 11:24
  SPEAKER_01: I think those are all like muscles that we're all working on building.
• 11:27
  SPEAKER_01: And it's encouraging for me to kind of hear that consistently repeated over and over and over again.
• 11:33
  SPEAKER_01: And the people that are saying it, I don't think they're saying it as like this is an easy thing to do.
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_01: I think they're saying it as like this is truly one of the hardest things to do.
• 11:41
  SPEAKER_01: And but if you can unlock this door in a way that feels safe for you, that is really where all the magic happens.
• 11:48
  SPEAKER_01: So Mariah and I have just been really playing around with this idea of like, how do you, how do you show up as yourself?
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_01: And especially in our current climate where to me, it feels hard to show up and not really water down my message because you know, what if I get in trouble?
• 12:02
  SPEAKER_01: What if somebody gets offended?
• 12:04
  SPEAKER_01: What, what if, what if like I have big visibility issues personally, and working through those is definitely my journey.
• 12:10
  SPEAKER_01: And so what we're hearing is it's so important not to water down your message.
• 12:14
  SPEAKER_01: It the secret to success is showing up as yourself and saying what it is that you're here to say.
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_01: But that is very difficult.
• 12:21
  SPEAKER_01: And a lot of us, as we talk about a lot on this online world, we kind of come in with that like school mindset that we learned that everybody else has the right answer, and I just need to study everybody else, and I just need the right coach to tell me what to do.
• 12:34
  SPEAKER_01: But really, the answer is the flip.
• 12:36
  SPEAKER_01: The answer is being able to look inside yourself and answer your own questions and figure out how this works for you.
• 12:42
  SPEAKER_01: So, this idea of being able to show up authentically and how to not water down your message seems to be this very pertinent theme that comes up in almost every single episode.
• 12:53
  SPEAKER_01: Would you agree?
• 12:55
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
• 12:56
  SPEAKER_00: And you want to know what's really interesting?
• 12:58
  SPEAKER_00: I don't even know if I told you this.
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_00: I was on Instagram scrolling and procrastinating, whatever the fuck I was supposed to be doing.
• 13:05
  SPEAKER_00: And I saw somebody who's a brand designer, brand strategist, and she was saying how the word authenticity is kind of like out.
• 13:13
  SPEAKER_00: Like everybody's always using the word authenticity, and like she is creating brands for people.
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_00: And she was like, everybody wants a quote, authentic brand.
• 13:23
  SPEAKER_00: Like they want to put in their values.
• 13:24
  SPEAKER_00: Like I am an authentic brand.
• 13:27
  SPEAKER_00: And at first, I was a little like knife to the heart.
• 13:30
  SPEAKER_00: I was like, what do you mean the word authentic is out?
• 13:32
  SPEAKER_00: Like, that is my fucking word, people.
• 13:34
  SPEAKER_00: What do you mean?
• 13:35
  SPEAKER_00: Like, am I like outdated already?
• 13:37
  SPEAKER_00: And then I thought about it and I was like, you know what the difference is?
• 13:40
  SPEAKER_00: It's the undercurrent of energetics.
• 13:43
  SPEAKER_00: When you say, I am an authentic brand, but there's no depth, it gets glossed over.
• 13:49
  SPEAKER_00: When you just naturally show up in who you be, is like people can feel that you are being authentic in your copywriting, in your design, on your sales pages, on your calls, in your workshops, on your podcast episodes.
• 14:03
  SPEAKER_00: When you show up consistently and you are able to step deeper into what it means to be authentic or like what it means to just be you in that moment.
• 14:14
  SPEAKER_00: Because I think a lot of times when we think about authenticity, we also think that it's like we have to show up the exact same in the exact same way every single time.
• 14:25
  SPEAKER_00: But that's not actually true.
• 14:27
  SPEAKER_00: Like who I am authentically today and how I'm showing up authentically as myself today is probably not who I'm gonna be showing up authentically as tomorrow.
• 14:36
  SPEAKER_00: Like, obviously, there's common threads, but it's like sometimes there is differences, or like how you're showing up in this season where maybe you're a little bit more introverted, you're a little bit more behind the scenes.
• 14:47
  SPEAKER_00: Just because you're not showing up and like allowing people to see you as deeply as maybe you did in other seasons, like that doesn't mean that you're being inauthentic in that season.
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_00: It just you actually are probably being authentic.
• 14:59
  SPEAKER_00: And I just feel like there's so many like layers to what this means, but there is like an energetic undercurrent you can feel when somebody is being themselves.
• 15:13
  SPEAKER_00: And it's interesting.
• 15:14
  SPEAKER_00: Me and Andrew, we're like fucking obsessed with the show Survivor, and we've watched it from season one all the way.
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_00: I think we're on like season 32.
• 15:22
  SPEAKER_00: We're obsessed with it.
• 15:23
  SPEAKER_00: It's absurd.
• 15:24
  SPEAKER_00: It's like a little bit of reality TV bullshit with also like some strategy and also like some challenges and like some whatever.
• 15:32
  SPEAKER_00: It's fascinating to me.
• 15:34
  SPEAKER_00: And every person like we'll call somebody, we're like, they're just like a hateable character.
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_00: They're just like hateable.
• 15:40
  SPEAKER_00: Like you watch them and like how they're operating and moving and maneuvering.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, ugh, this person is just so hateable.
• 15:48
  SPEAKER_00: And then I'm like, wait a minute, like what makes them hateable?
• 15:51
  SPEAKER_00: And my like what makes them repelling to me?
• 15:54
  SPEAKER_00: Like, you know, it's because they sound like a fucking politician.
• 15:58
  SPEAKER_00: They sound like they are saying things that they want you to hear.
• 16:03
  SPEAKER_00: And like they're saying things that they think that they should say, but like that doesn't actually make them as a person, quote, hateable.
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_00: It's just like it doesn't resonate because there isn't that undercurrent of authenticity.
• 16:16
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that that's just a huge thing that we have to keep in mind because it was just a reflection of for me in business watching these people and be like, wow, when they are showing up in a way that doesn't feel authentic to them and they're trying to like manipulate, even in like uh from a good intention way, they're trying to manipulate something or whatever, you fucking feel it.
• 16:36
  SPEAKER_00: When they're trying to water down their message and play nice, you feel it and it is repelling.
• 16:42
  SPEAKER_00: So I think that it was just there's just these so many instances of and and reminders of like how powerful it is to truly be yourself.
• 16:55
  SPEAKER_00: But the only person that can figure out what that means, the only person that can define that is you.
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_00: And that's the tough part because we have to marry that with the fact of we can't read the label when we're inside the jar.
• 17:08
  SPEAKER_00: So it's like, how are we the only ones that can define what authentic authenticity means to us?
• 17:13
  SPEAKER_00: But then we also can't fucking read the label.
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that that's why it gets so complex because we're just like, well, I see myself one way, but other people see myself this way.
• 17:22
  SPEAKER_00: So, like, who am I really?
• 17:23
  SPEAKER_00: And like starting to uncover those multi-layers, phew, it's tough.
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_01: Oh man, yeah, actually, you're reminding me of um we Mariah and I did some work with Ash Burnside, who was on the podcast at the beginning of the season.
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_01: And then we actually shot another episode, just Mariah and I talking about our um zone of genius work.
• 17:43
  SPEAKER_01: And so Mariah and I did a ton of work with her about like, hey, I know I'm good at a lot of things, but like what is the thing?
• 17:52
  SPEAKER_01: Like, what is the genius thing?
• 17:53
  SPEAKER_01: Because like Mariah was saying, it gets hard.
• 17:55
  SPEAKER_01: You're if you're like us, you know, you're smart and you can do a lot of things, and you get online and you see a lot of different examples and you think that all these people are doing it right and you're doing it wrong.
• 18:04
  SPEAKER_01: And and in my head, it starts to get really messy.
• 18:07
  SPEAKER_01: And it's like, what is me?
• 18:08
  SPEAKER_01: What is not me?
• 18:09
  SPEAKER_01: What is other people?
• 18:10
  SPEAKER_01: Where do I even start?
• 18:11
  SPEAKER_01: So I think your point is valid of you need someone outside of your jar to help you read your label.
• 18:17
  SPEAKER_01: And actually working with Ash, she one of the biggest things she said to me, and you got this is all like about astrology, but she brought up like um my mid-heaven versus my rising sign, and she described it as like rising sign is how I see myself, but mid-heaven is how everybody else sees me.
• 18:35
  SPEAKER_01: And the way that she explained that, it was like light bulbs, firecrackers, like it made so much sense to me.
• 18:42
  SPEAKER_01: It was sense to me, it was the biggest breakthrough I think I've had in a while.
• 18:46
  SPEAKER_01: And it it really helped me get clear of like, oh, that this is how people see me, and this is why they're saying things like this to me, and that all makes sense.
• 18:55
  SPEAKER_01: And then this is how I see myself, and that's how it affects me showing up.
• 18:58
  SPEAKER_01: It was just like click, click, click, click, click.
• 19:01
  SPEAKER_01: So that you may not have as much realization about your mid-heaven versus your rising, but that's just one specific example of get some other eyeballs on your business, on your life.
• 19:12
  SPEAKER_01: Like you, it's really valuable because we can get in our own heads and caught up in our own stuff.
• 19:17
  SPEAKER_01: And for me, like I just find myself I get on social media and I'm seeing all these people posting, and it's like everyone is just recycling the same things, they're saying the same things over and over and over again.
• 19:29
  SPEAKER_01: And the thing about the online space is like it's literally changing every single day.
• 19:34
  SPEAKER_01: Like you all say with AI, AI has totally changed everything.
• 19:37
  SPEAKER_01: And so, like, I'm tired of hearing all of these like rinse and repeat recycled adages.
• 19:42
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I feel like people are just sharing things because they think they should.
• 19:46
  SPEAKER_01: And I should be educating because that's what somebody told me.
• 19:49
  SPEAKER_01: But it's just like recycled old shit that probably doesn't even apply to the world right now or me and how I want to run my business.
• 19:57
  SPEAKER_01: And so I am finding people that are saying something different, people that are saying something new and novel, people that are bringing curiosity and trying new things and embracing the experiment.
• 20:09
  SPEAKER_01: Those are the people that feel like so nourishing to me.
• 20:12
  SPEAKER_01: And like when I'm around them, I just call it like they feel like sunshine, but they're just like giving me energy in life.
• 20:18
  SPEAKER_01: And I think that there's something to um allowing yourself to get, yes, get all the advice, get all the outside opinions, you know, but then like sit with it and you know, like let it simmer and then say it in your own words and and and give yourself permission to maybe say something a little different, maybe say something a little against the grain, you know, maybe try out some new ideas.
• 20:42
  SPEAKER_01: But I do think like we have seen over and over and over again the quote unquote secret to standing out in this online world is being different, being unique, saying something that is truly just you and came from you, you know, and that the people that have figured out how to create solve a specific problem in their own unique way, that is really like gasoline on the fire and like what makes these businesses blow up.
• 21:07
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 21:07
  SPEAKER_00: And it's funny because in my head, like you're saying, like, say something different, say something unique.
• 21:13
  SPEAKER_00: My instant reaction is like, how do I figure out what to say?
• 21:17
  SPEAKER_00: And it's like, bitch, it is literally like, what is your soul asking you to say?
• 21:23
  SPEAKER_00: What gets you fired up?
• 21:25
  SPEAKER_00: Why the fuck are you in business?
• 21:26
  SPEAKER_00: Why are you serving people?
• 21:28
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that that's another undercurrent that that I want to mention here that we've also seen is the common traits of successful people, high performers, whatever people want to kind of justify themselves at.
• 21:40
  SPEAKER_00: They show up as themselves, they show up authentically, and they operate through the lens of being of service.
• 21:48
  SPEAKER_00: They're not just showing up authentically and showing up as themselves to tell people what to do or to get some like super big ego high or like whatever.
• 21:59
  SPEAKER_00: It's really of like How can I serve my people?
• 22:02
  SPEAKER_00: So it's like getting curious about ourselves, what our message is, what we are being called to say.
• 22:08
  SPEAKER_00: And like, who are our people?
• 22:10
  SPEAKER_00: And that's why I think that it's so hard because like it is easier to water down your message.
• 22:17
  SPEAKER_00: I've been there.
• 22:18
  SPEAKER_00: Yo, I get reminders on Instagram all the time.
• 22:20
  SPEAKER_00: And it's literally like, this is what you shared on Instagram three years ago.
• 22:24
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm I'm like, please fucking delete that.
• 22:26
  SPEAKER_00: Delete that.
• 22:27
  SPEAKER_00: Like that, who who said that?
• 22:28
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't.
• 22:29
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't say that.
• 22:30
  SPEAKER_00: Like, not like the real me.
• 22:33
  SPEAKER_00: It was just, it was the same thing.
• 22:34
  SPEAKER_00: It was regurgitated bullshit of the same things that I thought that I had to say.
• 22:40
  SPEAKER_00: How many people, like I'm just thinking three years ago, how many people would say Facebook groups, get in Facebook groups to grow.
• 22:47
  SPEAKER_00: Everybody, everybody in the online space was like had a post on Instagram about how fucking great Facebook groups were.
• 22:52
  SPEAKER_00: And don't get me wrong, they were wonderful, especially in the beginning of business.
• 22:55
  SPEAKER_00: That's how I made a lot of friends.
• 22:57
  SPEAKER_00: But I'm looking at the shit and I'm just like, oh man, like this wouldn't fly now.
• 23:04
  SPEAKER_00: It wouldn't fly because social media has a low barrier to entry.
• 23:07
  SPEAKER_00: So anybody can come on and they can create anything that they want and then they can just start regurgitating the same shit.
• 23:14
  SPEAKER_00: And I just posted a blog post uh earlier this week about using AI for SEO and like, will Google rank AI content?
• 23:22
  SPEAKER_00: So if you guys want to read that, I will put the link in the show notes below.
• 23:25
  SPEAKER_00: Dude, it's a fucking work of art.
• 23:27
  SPEAKER_00: I will, I'll say it, it's a resource.
• 23:29
  SPEAKER_00: But the thing is, it's the same thing.
• 23:32
  SPEAKER_00: Like you can use AI to generate regurgitated same shit, mediocre, same stuff content, but it's not gonna show up on Google if you're not adding something to the conversation, if you're not putting your own tone and perspective into it.
• 23:48
  SPEAKER_00: Because think about it, as users, now that AI is becoming so popular, regurgitating the same shit and watering down your message, fuck, dude.
• 23:57
  SPEAKER_00: I could just use AI for that.
• 23:59
  SPEAKER_01: That's true.
• 24:00
  SPEAKER_00: So it's like, what is going to make you really stand out in this age of easily generated content?
• 24:06
  SPEAKER_00: It's going to be a figuring out what do you want to say?
• 24:10
  SPEAKER_00: What are you here to say?
• 24:11
  SPEAKER_00: What does your audience need to hear from you?
• 24:14
  SPEAKER_00: And like, notice when you're verbalizing to rationalize, or like when you're when you're thinking, what really stands out?
• 24:22
  SPEAKER_00: What are you noticing where maybe your tone goes up a little bit?
• 24:26
  SPEAKER_00: Like when I'm having conversations with people, I'm like, what are the words that I keep saying?
• 24:30
  SPEAKER_00: Or what topics am I noticing that I keep getting louder about?
• 24:35
  SPEAKER_00: That my voice and volume literally increases.
• 24:40
  SPEAKER_00: Cause you can tell that there's fire and there's passion behind that.
• 24:43
  SPEAKER_00: So it's starting to like put together these little clues of things.
• 24:48
  SPEAKER_00: But in order to figure out like what your message is, you have to fucking try it out.
• 24:53
  SPEAKER_00: The only way that you're gonna realize it is by looking in hindsight.
• 24:57
  SPEAKER_00: And I know that that sucks for like our perfectionist leaning people.
• 25:01
  SPEAKER_00: Believe me, been there, like still am there sometimes.
• 25:04
  SPEAKER_00: It fucking sucks and it's horrifying.
• 25:06
  SPEAKER_00: But the only way to truly figure this shit out is to take a baby step and do it.
• 25:11
  SPEAKER_00: So start doing it in a place that feels safe for you with your best friend, with your partner, with another friend, make a business friend.
• 25:19
  SPEAKER_00: Like do it in a room that doesn't have the spotlight on and then start bringing it to your audience, to your people.
• 25:26
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you start with your email list because it's like, fuck, those are people that chose to sign up to listen to me ramble about bullshit.
• 25:32
  SPEAKER_00: So test it with them before you bring it out to like a wider scale.
• 25:36
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, I think that's so spot on.
• 25:38
  SPEAKER_01: I love that.
• 25:39
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm like just reflecting on um, you know, I liked your point about it's like, yeah, yeah, we keep hearing be authentic, be authentic, but like where?
• 25:49
  SPEAKER_01: Start where?
• 25:50
  SPEAKER_01: What do you mean?
• 25:52
  SPEAKER_01: And I think, you know, I'm reminded of a couple episodes we had this season, you know, especially with like um talking with Melissa Lyons about like journaling to your soul every day.
• 26:01
  SPEAKER_01: And I I I was really um, I think there's a there's a piece to this conversation about leaning into spirituality or whatever you want to call it, the bigger mystery here that's come up a couple of times over this season of are you creating space to talk with yourself?
• 26:19
  SPEAKER_01: You know, like Melissa has a really beautiful practice of where she's connecting with herself.
• 26:22
  SPEAKER_01: And actually, the episode before her, Melinda talked about the same kind of idea.
• 26:27
  SPEAKER_01: How are you creating space to really connect with yourself, to grow a relationship with yourself?
• 26:33
  SPEAKER_01: Most of us don't know ourselves.
• 26:35
  SPEAKER_01: Most of us have been leaving these like almost completely external lives.
• 26:39
  SPEAKER_01: We do not create a lot of time for stillness, a lot of time for what do I want to say?
• 26:44
  SPEAKER_01: What is my voice?
• 26:46
  SPEAKER_01: And so, even if like starting with other people feels too extreme, start with yourself.
• 26:51
  SPEAKER_01: Check out episode 51 and 52 in this season.
• 26:54
  SPEAKER_01: Start with a practice of like connecting with yourself in your spirit or whatever kind of language you like to learn about that.
• 27:00
  SPEAKER_01: But there's something to just like um prioritizing a relationship with yourself that really builds worthiness and confidence in what you have to say.
• 27:11
  SPEAKER_01: Because for me, I just struggle a lot with like, yeah, I have ideas, but like they're not any, there's other people out there saying that.
• 27:18
  SPEAKER_01: They're not any better than those people, you know.
• 27:19
  SPEAKER_01: And I really had trouble like finding value in my own voice and my own uniqueness.
• 27:25
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm not going to say that I'm perfect at all these practices, but what I will say is this idea of connecting with what is bigger and what, you know, this idea of like what you're here to be and what you're here to say, and allowing some space for that on a day-to-day basis is very real for Mariah and I right now.
• 27:43
  SPEAKER_01: And if I'm predicting the future, I have a feeling that next season will be all around this kind of idea of like spirituality and business.
• 27:50
  SPEAKER_01: And how do you really strengthen this muscle and cultivate this relationship with yourself?
• 27:55
  SPEAKER_01: And from that place, you'll find when you are nourishing yourself, when you are pouring into your own cup, all of a sudden the ideas start to overflow.
• 28:03
  SPEAKER_01: All of a sudden, you're getting that's where you find your unique voice.
• 28:06
  SPEAKER_01: And that's where you can start doing what Mariah and I have been doing, going on other people's podcasts, letting yourself be interviewed, let it come out, and it's going to come out really imperfectly at first.
• 28:15
  SPEAKER_01: And that's going to feel uncomfortable.
• 28:17
  SPEAKER_01: But that's how it's supposed to be.
• 28:18
  SPEAKER_01: First time is the worst, right?
• 28:19
  SPEAKER_01: And then the next time and it comes out a little bit better.
• 28:22
  SPEAKER_01: And then all of a sudden, you're like me right now, where you're like, oh shit, I have some things to say about this and they're pretty good.
• 28:28
  SPEAKER_01: And now I'm thinking about, you know, like, how could I pull this into a book or into a lecture series or something?
• 28:33
  SPEAKER_01: But it all starts with connecting and valuing yourself and time with yourself and building a relationship just like a friend.
• 28:42
  SPEAKER_01: How are you friending yourself?
• 28:43
  SPEAKER_01: What friendship time are you spending with yourself?
• 28:45
  SPEAKER_01: How are you getting to know yourself?
• 28:47
  SPEAKER_01: How are you nourishing your body?
• 28:48
  SPEAKER_01: How are you nourishing your relationships?
• 28:50
  SPEAKER_01: You know, those kind of things.
• 28:51
  SPEAKER_01: Um, we've talked a lot with guests this season about how they show up for themselves.
• 28:56
  SPEAKER_01: What are their routines, practices, rituals that they use?
• 28:59
  SPEAKER_01: And that's another common theme we see over and over again is these people are they think highly of themselves, you know, they make space for themselves.
• 29:07
  SPEAKER_01: They're spending time in meditation and reflection and journaling.
• 29:10
  SPEAKER_01: They've cultivated this really powerful relationship with we all have this connection to something greater, to greater creativity, the new ideas, to the muse, whatever you want to say.
• 29:20
  SPEAKER_01: And we can all channel that into this world.
• 29:22
  SPEAKER_01: Like that's the cool magical part about being alive.
• 29:25
  SPEAKER_01: But if you don't make any space for that in that connection, it's going to be really hard not to just rinse and repeat and regurgitate because you're like, where are all these new ideas coming from in the first place?
• 29:36
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, the magic of being alive.
• 29:40
  SPEAKER_00: It's true, it's completely true, but also doesn't mean that it's easy.
• 29:44
  SPEAKER_00: And so it's like, we'll hear, you know, people say what they're doing in their morning routines and how they journal and the questions they ask themselves.
• 29:52
  SPEAKER_00: And we can use them as ideas, as we do all the time.
• 29:55
  SPEAKER_00: You know what I mean?
• 29:56
  SPEAKER_00: We're always consistently like me and Shay, and I'm assuming our listeners too.
• 30:00
  SPEAKER_00: We're just we're fucking curious about like what it means to be alive, what it means to be curious, what it means to be an entrepreneur or a business owner or somebody that like feels like they're getting deeper into what it means to live out their purpose.
• 30:19
  SPEAKER_00: And we've said, you know, like be authentic and all of that, and like don't water down your message.
• 30:24
  SPEAKER_00: What are you, what are you here to say uniquely as you?
• 30:29
  SPEAKER_00: And we can get caught in the thought of fuck, how do I figure out what is unique to me?
• 30:34
  SPEAKER_00: Here's here here's the thing all of us are so fucking different in our own ways, our experiences, our perspectives, our zones of genius.
• 30:46
  SPEAKER_00: All of us are intricately created and very different and unique in our own way.
• 30:52
  SPEAKER_00: And obviously, there's overlap, you know what I mean?
• 30:55
  SPEAKER_00: That's that's how you find your people, it's how you find your friends.
• 30:57
  SPEAKER_00: But like we are also unique.
• 31:00
  SPEAKER_00: We don't have to try to be unique.
• 31:05
  SPEAKER_00: We already are.
• 31:06
  SPEAKER_00: There is nobody out there that can do what I do like I do it point blank.
• 31:12
  SPEAKER_00: Like that's not something to argue about.
• 31:14
  SPEAKER_00: And so I think what it is is we've mentioned it before, it's it's coming back to ourselves, it's finding what is that unique thread and then building confidence in that because it's really fucking hard to share your voice, to share your message when you don't feel like you have something to say, or when you feel like you're not confident in it.
• 31:36
  SPEAKER_00: And so I think that there's just these pieces of like, we don't have to try to be unique, we don't have to try to have a different perspective.
• 31:43
  SPEAKER_00: If we allow ourselves to deepen into what it means to be ourselves, the message is there waiting for us.
• 31:50
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, damn, goose, that is good.
• 31:55
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you, thank you so much.
• 31:57
  SPEAKER_01: Um, you know, Mariah, as you were talking, I'm curious, like thinking back on the last season, what would you say some of like the big takeaways for you have been, or like what's been helpful for you as you've kind of been on this journey?
• 32:10
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 32:11
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I feel like personally, the confidence in my voice has 100% increased.
• 32:19
  SPEAKER_00: The confidence in being able to show up as an interviewer, like asking our guests questions, has definitely increased.
• 32:26
  SPEAKER_00: The confidence to fucking wing it, to trust myself, to be like, I don't have to have a full script.
• 32:32
  SPEAKER_00: I don't even really have to have questions, honestly.
• 32:34
  SPEAKER_00: Like I kind of I enjoy questions.
• 32:36
  SPEAKER_00: I I like being prepared, very line one human design of me.
• 32:40
  SPEAKER_00: I do like to have like the research and the foundation, but it's easier for me to step into the testing and tweaking on the fly without so much fear that I'm gonna fuck it up.
• 32:50
  SPEAKER_00: Like I've built this trust, this muscle of self-trust in my voice compared to previous seasons, compared to previous years.
• 33:00
  SPEAKER_00: And I feel like it's easier for me to connect with people a lot more than it used to be, because I feel like because I'm strengthening my voice, it allows people to see me, to understand, to feel me on a level that's more connected to who I am.
• 33:20
  SPEAKER_00: So I don't feel like I have to like perform or like be a certain way.
• 33:26
  SPEAKER_00: Like I show up and I fucking curse sometimes and like I say stuff.
• 33:30
  SPEAKER_00: And I wouldn't have confidence in that if I didn't allow myself to step into the arena.
• 33:39
  SPEAKER_00: And so Brene Brown talks about stepping into the arena and having courage to be able to be vulnerable and just share who you are and what you have to say authentically.
• 33:52
  SPEAKER_00: And you have to try not to take criticism from people that are also not in the arena.
• 33:57
  SPEAKER_00: So, what I've been focusing on and what has been really honestly like enlightening to me, I think I shared previously on the podcast that in the zone, like finding your zone of genius in that episode, where it was a huge light bulb moment for me to be like, I am not a coach.
• 34:12
  SPEAKER_00: Like right now, my title, it does not feel aligned as coach.
• 34:17
  SPEAKER_00: I prefer strategist, I prefer consultant, something like that.
• 34:20
  SPEAKER_00: And a couple of days ago, I kind of took this a little bit deeper and I was like, Yeah, but what else?
• 34:27
  SPEAKER_00: There's something here, there's a title here that I'm not really owning, and it's educator.
• 34:32
  SPEAKER_00: And it's like, I fucking love being an educator.
• 34:37
  SPEAKER_00: And then so I started looking at my business through the lens of being an educator, and holy fuck did that relieve a lot of pressure.
• 34:46
  SPEAKER_00: So, like looking at my YouTube channel a couple of months ago, or even honestly a couple of weeks ago, creating videos, I used to get like analysis paralysis, or even like I know that I'm recording them, and so I can edit my video editor, can edit out anything, dude, heart palpitations when I'm fucking recording a video because I'm like, oh fuck, people aren't gonna get it.
• 35:03
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna miss something, it's not gonna be perfect, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
• 35:06
  SPEAKER_00: Once I started looking at my YouTube videos, of like, nah, I'm just out here educating instantly lighter, instantly.
• 35:15
  SPEAKER_00: And so that was really interesting to me to be like, okay, so what else can I look at through the lens of being an educator?
• 35:23
  SPEAKER_00: And so, like the workshops that I've been testing, getting amazing fucking reviews for them.
• 35:29
  SPEAKER_00: I love doing them.
• 35:30
  SPEAKER_00: And so for me, it's like, okay, how can I expand on this even more?
• 35:34
  SPEAKER_00: Because my thing has always been like, I'm not a fucking SEO agency.
• 35:38
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not, I don't want to be.
• 35:39
  SPEAKER_00: I've had coaches on coaches on coaches be like, Raya, you could just start an agency.
• 35:43
  SPEAKER_00: You could hire people and then they could, you could outsource it to them.
• 35:46
  SPEAKER_00: It sounds fucking awful to me.
• 35:48
  SPEAKER_00: So it's like, okay, so if I don't want to be an agency, well, the way that I'm offering services to clients, they're still kind of correlated to if I want to run an agency of primarily doing done for you work.
• 36:01
  SPEAKER_00: So if I'm going to move from coach or consultant or whatever deeper into education, what could that look like?
• 36:10
  SPEAKER_00: And I feel like just asking myself those questions has really taken a lot of pressure off.
• 36:15
  SPEAKER_00: It feels a lot more aligned.
• 36:17
  SPEAKER_00: I feel like my business just feels fun.
• 36:19
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just like, how can I educate people on SEO?
• 36:22
  SPEAKER_00: How can I educate teams, corporate teams on SEO?
• 36:25
  SPEAKER_00: So having Holly on the podcast and being like, yeah, the corporate world fucking needs consultants and people like that.
• 36:30
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just like, yeah, I can educate corporate teams on SEO.
• 36:33
  SPEAKER_00: I can make the shit fun, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
• 36:36
  SPEAKER_00: I feel like doing that, like being aware of the words that I use to describe what I'm doing, has helped shift the seriousness or like the perfectionism that comes with sharing my voice.
• 36:52
  SPEAKER_00: And it was the same thing with being a coach.
• 36:54
  SPEAKER_00: And I've never really correlated this, but it's like when I was saying my message or my perspective and using the title of coach, it just didn't feel authentic to me, but I couldn't feel like what the like what is where's the bump in the undercurrent?
• 37:09
  SPEAKER_00: And I couldn't like figure it out.
• 37:11
  SPEAKER_00: And so what really kind of opened this light for me was as always, people dining in diving into human design, astrology, and gene keys is really has what's been extremely beneficial, along with like verbalizing to rationalize.
• 37:27
  SPEAKER_00: It's kind of all of that pulled together.
• 37:40
  SPEAKER_00: So we are in our third season of Curiously Guided, and there's nothing that fires us up more than making this podcast and hearing all the positive impacts it's having on our listeners.
• 37:51
  SPEAKER_00: Up until this point, this has been a pure passion project.
• 37:56
  SPEAKER_00: But we've got bills and expenses for this podcast, y'all.
• 37:59
  SPEAKER_00: If you have the means and would love to support us in creating new episodes, feel free to head over to curiouslyguided.com slash support to buy us a coffee.
• 38:11
  SPEAKER_01: And if you want even a deeper dive, we're excited to offer.
• 38:17
  SPEAKER_01: We're gonna now um start doing some strategy sessions where you get both Mariah and I's brains on your business.
• 38:24
  SPEAKER_01: And um, there's nowhere else in the world where you can we Mariah and I both don't work with people in such micro ways.
• 38:31
  SPEAKER_01: So this is kind of a cool thing to get both of us looking at your business in kind of like a one-off strategy session.
• 38:37
  SPEAKER_01: Just imagine us two and you together diving deeper on your business, marketing sales, and everything in between, um, all while filtering it through the lens of strategy energetics and energetics, which you know is our style.
• 38:51
  SPEAKER_01: So if you want to learn more about what working with Mariah and I could look like, head on over to our website, curiously guided.com slash session, to get the details.
• 39:00
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you guys so much for hanging out with us.
• 39:02
  SPEAKER_01: We appreciate you so, so much.
• 39:05
  SPEAKER_01: Now let's get back into the episode.
• 39:13
  SPEAKER_01: I love that.
• 39:14
  SPEAKER_01: Great.
• 39:14
  SPEAKER_01: So, what do you think about like where you're headed or like what do you want for the future of the podcast?
• 39:20
  SPEAKER_00: I want more honest, transparent conversations.
• 39:24
  SPEAKER_00: I just I want to keep pulling back the curtain.
• 39:26
  SPEAKER_00: I want to be able to shine the light and show people that like you can grow a business any way that you want to.
• 39:36
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that that's exactly what these conversations are doing.
• 39:38
  SPEAKER_00: Like, through these conversations is how I've been able to kind of see different possibilities and opportunities in other people's businesses because they're kind of like, hey, this is what's possible.
• 39:48
  SPEAKER_00: And it's helping when you hear these stories and like these people's journeys of how they've built a successful business, it reminds you that not every business is built the same way, even if you're seeing the same shit on Instagram, even if you're seeing their website might look the same and they might have the same services.
• 40:06
  SPEAKER_00: But I think just being able to pull back the curtain and showcase different opportunities and examples for how you can build a life that you truly give a shit about that also aligns with your zone of genius, and highlighting like different maybe spiritual tools of like how people figure that out.
• 40:29
  SPEAKER_00: How like what's their verbalized to rationalize?
• 40:32
  SPEAKER_00: What's their morning meditation?
• 40:34
  SPEAKER_00: Like, what does what is their process look like of tapping into creativity, tapping into the muse?
• 40:40
  SPEAKER_00: What questions are they asking themselves?
• 40:43
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I've realized that like the questions that we ask ourselves are highly important.
• 40:47
  SPEAKER_00: And I wouldn't be able to, I feel like, be on this journey of growing a business that makes sense for me if I didn't get better at asking myself better questions.
• 40:56
  SPEAKER_00: And so I think just being able to shine the spotlight on what other people are doing, how they're doing it in a real, authentic, honest, and transparent way.
• 41:10
  SPEAKER_00: I feel like that's the juice.
• 41:12
  SPEAKER_00: We need more of that.
• 41:13
  SPEAKER_00: We need more transparency, more pulling back the curtain, more like Holly said in our previous episode of like, I launched a course and only had fucking four people sign up.
• 41:22
  SPEAKER_00: And I didn't think that that was a failure.
• 41:24
  SPEAKER_00: I saw that as a testing and tweaking opportunity.
• 41:27
  SPEAKER_00: We need more of that, more realization that we don't have to do this by ourselves, even if we are running our business by ourselves.
• 41:36
  SPEAKER_00: What about you?
• 41:37
  SPEAKER_00: How do you see the how do you see the podcast unfolding?
• 41:40
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, um, I would say like to to take it back a step farther, this season for me was a lot of like um, you know, you hear a lot, be confident.
• 41:53
  SPEAKER_01: Say it confidently, like all you have to do is be confident.
• 41:56
  SPEAKER_01: And it's like, what is that?
• 41:58
  SPEAKER_01: What?
• 41:59
  SPEAKER_01: Like what for someone who is not feeling very confident in their value, it's like it feels really dumb to just tell you be confident.
• 42:06
  SPEAKER_01: It's like, but how?
• 42:08
  SPEAKER_01: And one thing we've learned, Ash actually said this confidence comes through proof, and so through this season, I've really noticed that like um giving yourself time to reflect, collect the points, as one of our past podcast guests said.
• 42:25
  SPEAKER_01: But like, where is the proof in your life that you have shown up and been valuable for someone in some way?
• 42:31
  SPEAKER_01: And that I so this season that has been a lot of me like finding some moments of proof in myself, in my value, in my worth, and like what I have to say.
• 42:40
  SPEAKER_01: And that came through allowing myself to be vulnerable and be seen and saying things, right?
• 42:44
  SPEAKER_01: But I've started to just like really be mindful of all these little any testimonial I get, I save it.
• 42:50
  SPEAKER_01: Any kind of positive feedback, any kind of nice reflection I get from someone, anytime a guest after these episodes is telling us, like, holy shit, I've never been interviewed, like you guys are able to interview people.
• 43:00
  SPEAKER_01: I've been really mindful about collecting all of those points.
• 43:04
  SPEAKER_01: And wow, all of a sudden my confidence is booming.
• 43:06
  SPEAKER_01: All of a sudden I feel excited to say things and get my message out into the world.
• 43:11
  SPEAKER_01: And it came through all these little moments of building proof and that proof that has led to confidence in myself.
• 43:17
  SPEAKER_01: So I think that if you're sitting here listening to us being like, yeah, easier said than done, know that like this is a journey that I have absolutely walked.
• 43:26
  SPEAKER_01: And it starts by just find the simplest little thing, find all of these simple little moments of proof, even if it doesn't feel like a big deal, but start really celebrating yourself and celebrating the little wins and finding just these little moments of proof to add to your proof jar.
• 43:43
  SPEAKER_01: And that builds confidence over time.
• 43:46
  SPEAKER_01: So I love that what you and I are doing is not only are we finding more proof for ourselves and like confidence in who we are and what we're here to do, but all of these people we're meeting were also adding proof to their proof jars, right?
• 43:58
  SPEAKER_01: We are validating them.
• 44:00
  SPEAKER_01: We're finding like where their genius is and we're helping like share that with the world.
• 44:05
  SPEAKER_01: And then we're seeing them get inspired from the episodes and go share more of their magic with the world.
• 44:10
  SPEAKER_01: So I feel like what we're creating here has been like almost like a ripple effect of like helping boost our own confidence and helping boost the confidence in the people that we're speaking with.
• 44:19
  SPEAKER_01: And then what I hope is boosting the confidence of our listeners that this is a really wonderful place to be, this online business world.
• 44:27
  SPEAKER_01: And there is no one right way to do this.
• 44:30
  SPEAKER_01: Like Mariah just hinted at, I've been told so many times, you know, like start a course, start a mastermind, to blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
• 44:37
  SPEAKER_01: And not that that is wrong or bad, but that has not felt like the right path for me.
• 44:42
  SPEAKER_01: And it took me a long time to be like, get out of what's wrong with me?
• 44:46
  SPEAKER_01: Why can't I do this?
• 44:47
  SPEAKER_01: And into, oh, maybe there's a million billion ways to earn money and I get to figure out a way that works for me.
• 44:53
  SPEAKER_01: And to layer on top of that, embracing the season that you're in in life.
• 44:57
  SPEAKER_01: And so the season that I'm in in life is currently, I was tired of working by myself in a silo.
• 45:04
  SPEAKER_01: I wanted to be with more people and more eyes and um be in more of a team environment.
• 45:09
  SPEAKER_01: And that felt really, I have a lot of instability in my personal life.
• 45:12
  SPEAKER_01: So that felt really like, oh, I could get a little bit more stability in my business life.
• 45:16
  SPEAKER_01: And I sought that out.
• 45:18
  SPEAKER_01: And that feels really great for this chapter.
• 45:20
  SPEAKER_01: And again, that all came from like radical self-awareness and like acknowledging that like business is not operating in a silo, it's operating in a bigger life that I'm living.
• 45:31
  SPEAKER_01: And I get to decide like what kind of role it plays in my life.
• 45:34
  SPEAKER_01: So it's just this idea of like giving ourselves permission, giving people we're talking with permission, giving all of our listeners permission to like forget all the programming, unlearn, you know, like there is no way to do this.
• 45:48
  SPEAKER_01: And just because a really smart person with a lot of money told you that you should do it one way doesn't mean that they're right.
• 45:54
  SPEAKER_01: And it really comes from building your own confidence muscles and finding your own proof and taking the baby steps.
• 46:00
  SPEAKER_01: Like literally, it's just a little fucking baby step at a time.
• 46:03
  SPEAKER_01: And that makes it lighter for me of like, oh, I just have to do this little thing and this little thing and this little thing.
• 46:09
  SPEAKER_01: And then all of a sudden, all those things compound on each other.
• 46:12
  SPEAKER_01: And you know, these really like just personal wins, you're feeling stronger, but then you're starting to see more money coming in and you're starting to see all the things happen.
• 46:20
  SPEAKER_01: So this, like, I just feel like we're like on the cusp of something here, and like we're just starting to like tap into the magic of what this truly is, but like sharing curiosity with the world and the power of asking really good questions and how to ask questions, like we know that all of this magic comes to asking good questions, allowing yourself to stay open-minded, not thinking you have the right answer all the time and everything nailed down.
• 46:47
  SPEAKER_01: And so, if we can kind of share that, like life is fun and we get to be curious and we get to do this however we want, and you can too, like you're the shit, and like how do we get your shit out in the world?
• 46:58
  SPEAKER_01: That just like feels so life-giving.
• 47:00
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah, I agree.
• 47:02
  SPEAKER_00: Because like, that's the juice, right?
• 47:05
  SPEAKER_00: That's the juice.
• 47:06
  SPEAKER_00: And like we were talking about like everybody is unique, everybody like it.
• 47:11
  SPEAKER_00: Sounds cheesy.
• 47:12
  SPEAKER_00: You are unique, and you are your own star in the sky, and nobody is like you, but like fucking truly, like true, truly, it's and so that's why I think me personally owning my own business, that's what I fucking love the most about it.
• 47:27
  SPEAKER_00: I get to test and tweak and figure the shit out.
• 47:31
  SPEAKER_00: And that's the pro.
• 47:33
  SPEAKER_00: That's like the pro of this.
• 47:34
  SPEAKER_00: The con is in order to test and tweak, in order to build a business that feels aligned and authentic to me, in order to feel confident and sharing my message, in order to build the muscle of self-trust, I gotta get real fucking honest with myself.
• 47:52
  SPEAKER_00: And that is a piece that to be honest, a lot of people are not willing to do.
• 47:58
  SPEAKER_00: I I look around, you know, like my friends from home and stuff like that, and just like uh personal relationships.
• 48:05
  SPEAKER_00: People are not willing to get honest with themselves.
• 48:08
  SPEAKER_00: And I think even in this bigger business context, we're seeing a shift in the online business space where the old way of doing things is not working anymore.
• 48:16
  SPEAKER_00: We've talked about it numerous times, like bro marketing and just like fucking manipulative sales bullshit and the old way of like hype marketing and like lifestyle marketing of like, look, I have a yacht, don't you want a yacht?
• 48:30
  SPEAKER_00: And then it's like you get caught up in the oh, I want a yacht and I want to make a million dollars a month.
• 48:35
  SPEAKER_00: And it's like, yeah, I mean, like if you really want that, cool.
• 48:38
  SPEAKER_00: But it's so easy to get swept up in here.
• 48:42
  SPEAKER_00: And I think one of the other muscles to be able to strengthen is are you creating time to be honest with yourself in whatever way that looks like?
• 48:53
  SPEAKER_00: Like I pulled some tarot cards yesterday, and one of the cards, shit, I forgot which one it was, but basically it was something in reverse, which like my middle name is literally reverse tarot cards.
• 49:04
  SPEAKER_00: They fucking hit me in the gut all the time.
• 49:06
  SPEAKER_00: So I looked it up and I was just like, what does this mean?
• 49:08
  SPEAKER_00: And it was like, sit with the question of what does success look like for you?
• 49:12
  SPEAKER_00: And at first, my human, my ego was like, I roll.
• 49:16
  SPEAKER_00: Bitch, I've done this a million fucking times.
• 49:18
  SPEAKER_00: Success looks like this, it looks like that.
• 49:19
  SPEAKER_00: And then I'm like, you know what?
• 49:21
  SPEAKER_00: I'm I pulled this card for a reason.
• 49:24
  SPEAKER_00: Mariah, get out of your own way.
• 49:26
  SPEAKER_00: Open up the journal and just sit with it.
• 49:28
  SPEAKER_00: Even if you've written it down a million times, what does it look like for you right now?
• 49:32
  SPEAKER_00: And I ended up writing down things that I've never written down before.
• 49:37
  SPEAKER_00: And in my head, I was like, well, in order to hit this amount of money or to have a successful business, I have to do this, this, and this.
• 49:44
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, well, what if I didn't?
• 49:45
  SPEAKER_00: Because I have the story in my head that like I can't have a successful business if I have mostly low-ticket offers.
• 49:51
  SPEAKER_00: And so I went like writing down, like, I want more passive income, I want more low-ticket offers.
• 49:56
  SPEAKER_00: Like one one of my one of my values is really being able to educate and to help people get the information that they need in a way that they can understand within a budget that they can afford.
• 50:07
  SPEAKER_00: That's why I'm really big on now, like low-ticket workshops.
• 50:10
  SPEAKER_00: That's why I'm really big on YouTube videos, educating, doing podcasts and stuff like that.
• 50:15
  SPEAKER_00: And I had this thought in my head that, like, there's no way that I could build a successful business on mostly low-ticket offers.
• 50:21
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, that's interesting.
• 50:23
  SPEAKER_00: And I wrote that down and I allowed myself to be like, that's what success would look like for me.
• 50:28
  SPEAKER_00: Most of my income coming in from low-ticket offers and being able to truly be of service to my people in the way that felt good for them and felt good for me.
• 50:38
  SPEAKER_00: And maybe my meaning of success will change in a couple of months or in a couple of years or whatever, because it's always in flux, it's always in flow.
• 50:46
  SPEAKER_00: But getting honest with myself of like, what does success look like?
• 50:51
  SPEAKER_00: And why do I think that I can't have that?
• 50:54
  SPEAKER_00: Where did I pick up that thought, that programming, that way of running a business?
• 50:59
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that that's just a piece that a lot of people don't talk about because we can get swept up if we're in coaching programs, if we're in masterminds, if we're scrolling on social media easily, like in a week's time frame, I think that I have 1700 ideas of how to grow my business because I'm picking up, oh, that's a good way to do it.
• 51:18
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, I should do that.
• 51:19
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, that's so good.
• 51:20
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, good for that person.
• 51:21
  SPEAKER_00: I love that.
• 51:21
  SPEAKER_00: That's so great.
• 51:23
  SPEAKER_00: But I need the time to get honest with myself.
• 51:25
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, but where am I at right now?
• 51:26
  SPEAKER_00: And what makes sense for me?
• 51:28
  SPEAKER_00: And what is my version of success?
• 51:29
  SPEAKER_00: And how do I want to show up authentically?
• 51:31
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that it's all truly connected.
• 51:36
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I think there's something about yes, get out, get the inspiration, but then also put the blinders on, stay focused on your lane.
• 51:43
  SPEAKER_01: And like it's hard.
• 51:45
  SPEAKER_01: I get really confused if I'm getting too many ideas of like what's from outside and what's from inside.
• 51:50
  SPEAKER_01: So I really love what you just shared there.
• 51:52
  SPEAKER_01: Um, tell me about, you know, like you kind of hinted at this, but I'm I'm curious, you know.
• 51:58
  SPEAKER_01: Our typical question, what is what would you say is sparking your curiosity the most right now?
• 52:05
  SPEAKER_00: I think it's right now being able to widen the net of making like what it means to be successful, like making that possible.
• 52:15
  SPEAKER_00: So, like, what does that look like for me?
• 52:17
  SPEAKER_00: And at the time of this recording, I actually have um I find I feel like for so long, it's been hard for me to find an example of somebody running a business in a way that I want to run my business.
• 52:30
  SPEAKER_00: But also it was hard because I didn't know how I wanted to run my business, right?
• 52:34
  SPEAKER_00: So it's like I could have hired anybody.
• 52:37
  SPEAKER_00: But now that I'm getting even clearer on what that looks like, I have been following this girl.
• 52:43
  SPEAKER_00: Hopefully, and hopefully she comes on the podcast next season.
• 52:46
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna try to pitch her, but I've been following her, and the way that she runs her business is so much aligned with how I want to run mine.
• 52:55
  SPEAKER_00: So she has a successful YouTube channel right now.
• 52:58
  SPEAKER_00: I think it's got like 25,000 subscribers, and she creates like low-ticket things, she'll do workshops, and she does workshops for like bigger companies like Canva and stuff like that.
• 53:13
  SPEAKER_00: And then she goes into corporate and teaches like trainings for corporate companies and stuff like that.
• 53:19
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, that literally pulls in everything that I love.
• 53:24
  SPEAKER_00: And so, not ironically, last week she sent an email to her list and she was like, Hey, I completely cut out coaching last year because I was like, I don't want to, it sounds awful, blah, blah, blah.
• 53:36
  SPEAKER_00: And she was like, I think I just wasn't doing it right.
• 53:38
  SPEAKER_00: I'm now opening up like seven spots.
• 53:41
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, literally emailed right away.
• 53:43
  SPEAKER_00: I was like, send me the fucking link.
• 53:44
  SPEAKER_00: I don't give a shit how much it is.
• 53:45
  SPEAKER_00: Like, send me the link, bitch.
• 53:46
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I need an hour of your time.
• 53:48
  SPEAKER_00: So we have a call tomorrow.
• 53:50
  SPEAKER_00: So I am super excited to just be able to dive in and to just kind of get some some insider knowledge because every business that I see doesn't like everybody's doing done for you or service-based work and stuff like that.
• 54:06
  SPEAKER_00: And like it's the educator piece, man.
• 54:09
  SPEAKER_00: It's really truly like, how can I grow this?
• 54:12
  SPEAKER_00: And I love creating YouTube videos.
• 54:13
  SPEAKER_00: I just had to find a new YouTube editor, which like y'all hiring people, not not even like a full-time thing, but like just the process of that.
• 54:23
  SPEAKER_00: But it's just being able to get some insider knowledge and like have somebody else pull back the curtain in a way that aligns with your business.
• 54:36
  SPEAKER_00: Like it just it feels so exciting for me to have somebody, and she's got fucking brand sponsorships.
• 54:42
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, yo, fucking pay me, dude.
• 54:44
  SPEAKER_00: Pay me to talk about your shit.
• 54:46
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm just like, so yeah, I am I'm very excited about all of that.
• 54:51
  SPEAKER_00: So I feel like I'm just I'm curious about what business could look like.
• 54:57
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm excited for season four to be able to give you guys kind of the update on how all of this is unfolding.
• 55:07
  SPEAKER_01: I love that.
• 55:08
  SPEAKER_01: I especially love what you said about like, um, yes, we've all asked ourselves a question.
• 55:12
  SPEAKER_01: Like, if you're listening to this podcast, I hope you've asked yourself a question, like, what does success look like for me versus like all the dude bros I see on Instagram?
• 55:20
  SPEAKER_01: But I like what you took at a next level of like, and why do I think I can't have that?
• 55:25
  SPEAKER_01: Because I do think, like, yeah, I can tell you what success looks like.
• 55:28
  SPEAKER_01: It looks like a beach house in Malibu or whatever, but then I can immediately go, like, oh, but that's not for someone like me.
• 55:32
  SPEAKER_01: And so it's like, I think taking it to that next step is really powerful.
• 55:37
  SPEAKER_00: What about you?
• 55:38
  SPEAKER_00: What how how do you see things unfolding?
• 55:41
  SPEAKER_00: What are you curious about, especially during during our downtime in between seasons?
• 55:46
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, my curiosity, it's gonna, this is gonna make me sound um a little out there, hopefully not for our audience.
• 55:52
  SPEAKER_01: So it's all around leather jackets.
• 55:55
  SPEAKER_01: And so um, I do this work with my therapist where I like connect to my core self.
• 56:00
  SPEAKER_01: And up until this point, my core self has always showed up as like uh really chill by the pool in Palm Springs, very calm and relaxed, and just like this nice, calming, peaceful presence.
• 56:12
  SPEAKER_01: But lately she's been showing up.
• 56:14
  SPEAKER_01: We came out of like a journey together, and I got this message of like get a leather jacket.
• 56:18
  SPEAKER_01: And my core self has been showing up in the leather jacket more lately, and it's been more like courageous and brave.
• 56:24
  SPEAKER_01: And then I like I just when things start to happen, I'll notice like serendipitous moments.
• 56:28
  SPEAKER_01: And so now all of course, leather jackets are coming up everywhere.
• 56:32
  SPEAKER_01: But Mariah, you'll appreciate this.
• 56:33
  SPEAKER_01: Mariah and I pull cards, tarot cards for the year in January every year.
• 56:38
  SPEAKER_01: And um, my card for this month is literally the bitch, it's the chariot.
• 56:43
  SPEAKER_01: And in my deck, the bitch is wearing a goddamn leather jacket.
• 56:46
  SPEAKER_01: And so, like, I got that message, and then I pulled out my card for the month.
• 56:49
  SPEAKER_01: She's in a leather jacket.
• 56:51
  SPEAKER_01: I also had a friend recommend me this book called Unbound, and it's all about um the woman who wrote it is a tau, a Taoist monk, but she's also a Dominatrix, and that's all about like embracing power and what power is.
• 57:04
  SPEAKER_01: And so, like, I was like, oh, leather, like leather jacket, you know.
• 57:08
  SPEAKER_01: So I keep getting all these like weird things kind of leading me down the road of like, what does it look like when I metaphorically put on and realistically put on my leather jacket and kind of embrace this more courageous side of myself?
• 57:20
  SPEAKER_01: Ash called it, I have a rowdy side of myself that I'm like trying to step into, and I really like that language.
• 57:25
  SPEAKER_01: So yeah, like I think this summer, you know, I'm got a couple leather jackets in my cart right now.
• 57:30
  SPEAKER_01: I'm waiting for the perfect one, but it's kind of more of like that energy of like, what does it look like when I start to show up as this more like brave and courageous person?
• 57:38
  SPEAKER_01: And um, yeah, that's kind of been unfolding for me, if that makes any sense.
• 57:41
  SPEAKER_00: Just boss ass bitch energy.
• 57:43
  SPEAKER_00: Like hopefully how we harness the boss ass bitch energy.
• 57:48
  SPEAKER_01: That's it.
• 57:48
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, stepping into that.
• 57:49
  SPEAKER_01: So hopefully when we come back in at the end of the summer, we're gonna have some more boss ass bitch energy to share with y'all.
• 57:55
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god, that would be so fun.
• 57:57
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it's when I the last time that I did some kind of journey with like seeing what my higher self was like showing up as, it was interesting because it's not what I expected, but I guess like I don't really know what I expected.
• 58:10
  SPEAKER_00: But she had like this um very feminine, like but flowing long dress, but like also pretty sexy, and she's like carrying this um like this what is it called?
• 58:22
  SPEAKER_00: Like the the flame, the torch, like a torch in her hand, and she had tattoos and just like gold, like stacked jewelry everywhere, and she was just like a boss ass bitch, and I was just like, Yeah, we need to be holding that torch, we need to be showing up and sharing our message with more more courage, more bravery.
• 58:45
  SPEAKER_00: Because I mean, even if we zoom out, that's how we change the world, no, is like being able to a show up as ourselves in whatever way that means, because we don't have to figure it out because it's already who the fuck we are.
• 59:00
  SPEAKER_00: So it's being able to show up and let the world see us in what it means to be ourselves in a way that's confident, and it's sound like when you put words to it, it sounds so simplistic, like, oh, just show up and be confident, but no, like it takes work and there is iterations, like it is not like me confident today is not me confident next month.
• 59:25
  SPEAKER_00: That's true, and allowing that yeah, and I mean just like stepping into what that journey means and getting radically fucking honest with yourself.
• 59:39
  SPEAKER_00: Like, am I showing up and sharing what it means to be authentic to me?
• 59:45
  SPEAKER_00: I feel like that's also a question.
• 59:47
  SPEAKER_00: And like sometimes when I share that shit, literally, like I'll post something and I'll be like, whoo, like I need to go lay in bed around a fucking blanket for a hot second.
• 59:56
  SPEAKER_00: And like when you start sharing your message, when you start sharing the shit that is deep inside of your soul, your voice will shake and it will be scary.
• 1:00:04
  SPEAKER_00: That's a sign that there's power in there, literally, just like waiting for you to keep taking the baby steps so it can come out like a fire hose.
• 1:00:12
  SPEAKER_01: I loved that part of this episode when you shared, like, pay attention to when your voice is elevating and like you're getting fired up.
• 1:00:18
  SPEAKER_01: And there's actually a quote this old comedian, he's passed away, his name's Bill Hicks, but he had this quote once it was like, um, what you should be doing in this life, like if you're wondering, think about what pisses you off.
• 1:00:30
  SPEAKER_01: Like, what lights your heart on fire?
• 1:00:33
  SPEAKER_01: What elevates your voice?
• 1:00:35
  SPEAKER_01: Like, start there.
• 1:00:36
  SPEAKER_01: And I was like, Oh, that's such good.
• 1:00:38
  SPEAKER_01: Like, yeah, what gets you rowdy?
• 1:00:41
  SPEAKER_01: What gets you wound up?
• 1:00:42
  SPEAKER_01: What elevates your voice?
• 1:00:43
  SPEAKER_01: Like, that's such good advice if you're struggling and you can't really decipher what's mine and what's not mine.
• 1:00:48
  SPEAKER_01: Pay attention to the feelings, pay attention to how it's coming through you.
• 1:00:52
  SPEAKER_01: And even if it is a pissed off, like I'm pissed off about this.
• 1:00:55
  SPEAKER_01: That's probably a sign that like there's something there that resonates with you and you want to do something about it.
• 1:00:59
  SPEAKER_01: So I really love that idea.
• 1:01:00
  SPEAKER_01: And then