Latest / Petty and Unbothered / #7 - Petty award show & Petty therapy advice
Transcript
- Tita Lors: That's so cool. I like it so much. I'm so happy with that and how that came out. Yeah. It does. Robin Axline: Yuck! Tita Lors: Any users, we're here, we're paying attention. Stretchy stretch. I need to start stretching more often. All right. Robin Axline: I try to ⁓ Tita Lors: I should do that. I get harassed every morning. Yeah, by toddlers. Yeah, anyways, we're here. We're starting the show. It's happening. We're doing it. We have a super cool new intro. I'm super stoked about it. I hope everybody likes it. ⁓ Yeah. have questions for you. ⁓ Robin Axline: Let's go. Tita Lors: Okay, did you hear about Binksy? Robin Axline: What's going on with Banksy? ⁓ Tita Lors: Okay. Yeah, so we hopefully we all know who Banksy is. Banksy is the artist, right? The street artist. Yeah. Yeah, in New York, especially. Yeah, right. So he's an artist who was unknown. And that was kind of like the really cool thing about him. And you would just see his art popping up here and there. And it usually made a statement about something that was just really good street art. Robin Axline: I've seen several of his things around Manhattan. Yeah. Tita Lors: Somebody has unmasked or unveiled who Banksy actually is. Robin Axline: because he's famously anonymous. Tita Lors: Exactly. ⁓ and now he is not. This happened like 10 days ago. Yeah. Robin Axline: What? That's crazy. Is he the guy from Dof Punk or the guy from Massive Attack? Well, those were some of the rumors who he might be. Tita Lors: I have no idea who those people are. I didn't put my link here for what it was, but it was on like, yeah, no, it's okay because I figured one of us could do a deep dive into it as a topic and talk about Banksy. ⁓ How are you feeling about him being unveiled? Robin Axline: I feel like it's... I don't know, I feel like that was part of a shtick. That people didn't know what he looked like and people were... Like I was saying, like, there's like this list of people who he could be. And all these conspiracy theories, so I feel like a little bit bummed about that. I mean, I know, I haven't looked up what he looks like, but... Tita Lors: Yeah, seriously. Exactly. Yeah. Robin Axline: I wonder if it kind of makes him lose some of his cachet, like, the lore around him. Tita Lors: makes him lose out but I feel like there's there's a lot of things that he could say and do with his art by being an otter miss but he can't do that anymore Robin Axline: Yeah, that's true. On the other hand though, I feel like at this point in his career, he's gotten like away with all this and everybody like loves him so much that ⁓ he can basically do whatever he wants. Like people pay big money for his stuff. And then there's like, ⁓ go ahead. Tita Lors: True, there's that also. Yeah, then he's yeah, he's had like art installations and all that stuff too. Robin Axline: Yeah, and there's like a building here where ⁓ I think they wanted to demolish the building so they just cut his artwork out and then they were gonna like sell it or something. Like put a glass or ⁓ plexiglass over it. Yeah, so I just feel like it's to that point where like if he does ⁓ his artwork on somebody's building, they'd be like, yay. Tita Lors: huh. Yeah. I know. But there's like before it was like there was nobody to sue. was nobody to like tis tis bad bad. But now if they don't like it or if they're upset about the message or whatever, then now there is someone. Yeah. bummed about it. think a lot of like some of the the best thing or like yeah I guess about Banksy is that you didn't know who he was and and it was like ⁓ where will he be next where is he gonna pop up next and you just surprise Robin Axline: Yeah, totally. Yeah. Yeah, because I remember he one that I went to go see he took over like an empty lot that you probably like not probably like you supposed to trespass. It was like a gate. And then it was like this little cove and it was on the Lower East Side. And then he did like this whole crazy art in there. But it was like, you know, anonymous. Tita Lors: Yeah, ⁓ some a topic for us to look into in the future I feel like there's got to be a reason somebody decided to out him because what's the fucking point? Robin Axline: Yeah, ⁓ well, did he he didn't out himself? that's a little bit different because I was thinking, why did he do that? So. ⁓ Tita Lors: No, somebody did it. Mm-hmm. Yeah, no. Somebody posted, I found Banksy and then it was all over Reddit. Threads. It was on Threads. Yeah, or some shit. I don't know. It probably wasn't that. Also, are you on Threads? Because Threads community is wild. There's some stories on there that I'm like, ⁓ my God. Robin Axline: Yeah, I know. Tita Lors: Should you be sharing this? Robin Axline: Yeah, people do go a bit wild on there, for sure. I dip my toes in every once in a while, but sometimes I get into like it's like where I lose time. And I'm like, ⁓ no, I can't be doing this. So I kind of limit my threads allowance. Tita Lors: ⁓ huh. Yeah. Yeah, same. ⁓ I do that with Instagram especially because Instagram will just keep by habit, keep going back to it and back to it and back to it. Threads, I don't even know where the icon is. It's not anywhere I can easily access it. I have to actually type it in and find it. Robin Axline: I always feel like I... I just feel like I get tricked a lot to go on threads like I'll see something on IG and then it'll be like ⁓ something you would like and I click on it and then it opens threads and I'm like no I didn't want to go on threads today and there's all these like people that are like ⁓ are you up on gay thread or yeah gay threads Tita Lors: Now we're here! Robin Axline: And there's like all these different topics. ⁓ Yeah. Tita Lors: Yeah, it's like Reddit but different. ⁓ Robin Axline: But yeah, I don't do too much threading. Tita Lors: Neither do I. Just occasional also I get tricked into it just like you or my friend will send me. I have like one friend who is on threads often and she'll send me a story and I'm like, ⁓ my God, I need to hear more. Tell me more. What else happened? What do you mean? Like there's one story that I'll probably bring to the table. It's not really like super petty. It's actually, I don't know, it's so good. There's like a wedding that was supposed to be happening. I'm waiting for threads to find out more information about it and give more updates. But it was just like the person paid for everything but canceled the whole wedding. Like the day of yeah and like here here's all the presents take them sell them do whatever you want with it paid everyone. Yeah yeah and all of the vendors are like coming together to try to figure out the story but also give them back their money because they're like ⁓ but we didn't do anything right like we'll take the the down payment or the whatever it was non-refundable but we never actually did the work so they're trying to give them back the money so. Robin Axline: Wow. Well that's nice. That would make a good story for sure. Tita Lors: Mm-hmm. Right? And there's another one. I don't remember it, but that one was really good. Robin Axline: No, that's a good one. I honestly I I kind of get a bit of a vibe that reminds me of when early Twitter ⁓ because I was like an early, early tweeter back in the day. ⁓ Tita Lors: I never got into it. I never... I guess I just didn't get what I was supposed to do. Robin Axline: Yeah, I was like, ⁓ my god, I was like so addicted to it for sure. Especially when ⁓ the food truck boom happened in LA. And... Yes. So I'd be like refreshing my Twitter, be like, ⁓ where's this truck gonna be today? ⁓ And it even carried into New York life for me too, for a minute. But now it's just trash and I will not support X. Period. Tita Lors: ⁓ and to find out where the food trucks where you had to be. Yes, I do remember that. Robin Axline: So yeah, yeah, but early Twitter does remind me of early threads, so. Tita Lors: Mm-hmm. Okay. Hard left. ⁓ The award ceremony for us, not for the listeners, but for us, they just are the main three, like the big three or four, those ones, they are done, I believe. ⁓ So, you know, you're in the acting and film industry. Have you ever attended an awards show? Robin Axline: No, you know, I haven't, honestly. Like, yeah, I'm trying to think. Maybe nothing, nothing like big, like that would be televised. But. Tita Lors: Okay. Yeah, did you know you could go just like as a filler to fill seats because they don't like having empty seats? Robin Axline: I have heard tell, but I don't know how you would get involved in that. Tita Lors: ⁓ I forgot, but there's a thing where like as an extra, if you, there's a website where you can try to be an extra and they will like cast for it, cast for it. Yeah. Because they need people. Robin Axline: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I wonder, yeah. I wonder if it's a non-union though. I probably couldn't do it, unfortunately. Because I used to do, I mean, humble brag. No, I used to do seat filling for like talk shows and stuff back in the day, so. But now I can't get those. Tita Lors: You Yeah, my friend too. Yeah, that's the only reason why I knew about it, because my friend back in the day also, I don't know if she ever actually got unionized or not, but yeah, that's how she got in because she was a seat filler. Yeah. Robin Axline: Yeah, there's like so many funny jokes about seat filling and... No, it just like... Tita Lors: Tell me. Robin Axline: I don't know, there's like people that are like picky and want to sit by certain celebrities and try to like work the system and I don't know, I've heard ⁓ people in the biz that I know that have had experience with that and there's like some weird rules that you can't get up and you know, because you're filling a seat ⁓ and it's like not as glam as I mean, not as glam as you'd imagine. And then I was just rewatching ⁓ the first two seasons of The Comeback. ⁓ It's a Lisa Kudrow ⁓ show. Because the new season, just the first episode just dropped, but as of our recording. ⁓ But there was this one episode where she's at the Emmys and this one guy is a seat filler and he wouldn't get up. Tita Lors: ⁓ okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've heard it. Yeah. Robin Axline: And so they were like, get up! Like, I'm back. Or was like somebody there that wanted to sit down. It just made me, yeah, it just made me teethee. I just remembered that part. I just watched it. It was so funny. Like the seat filler was like, no, I'm sitting here. And they're like, ⁓ no, I'm the celebrity. Get up. Yeah. So, anywho, yeah, we're... Tita Lors: ⁓ huh. Yeah. It is literally my seat. man. Literally, it's my seat. Robin Axline: just over the award system, or many awards, ceremonies, yes. Tita Lors: ceremony yeah yeah or like the main primetime one because there's actually I ended up looking it up while I was doing the research for this there's so many all year round Yeah. I was like, there's, there's gotta be a moment where there's a break. There's not every month has an awards, something going on. know. Yeah, I like, okay, how many, whatever. And some of them make a lot of sense to me, especially because like notoriously the big awards ceremonies are like very Caucasian. Right? Yeah, exactly. So there's a lot of other ones that were created to be more ⁓ inclusive or to be more, to highlight more specific communities. Yeah, which are really cool. Mm hmm. Yeah. So anyways, do you have any fun stories about awards season or I know you said you've never been to one, so I don't know. But I did ask. Robin Axline: Yeah, I will have a- yeah, I do have a little bit of- it's not like- well, we'll see. No, I, because, I'm on the sag board, it's every year I get inundated with films and TV shows to review. Tita Lors: Yeah ⁓ you get all the CDs, right? Yeah. ⁓ yeah, CDs, DVDs. Robin Axline: ⁓ Yeah, the DVDs get mailed to like, and they're all watermarked so you're supposed to destroy them after you watch them. I always was very diligent about doing that, like, because people would ask me like, ⁓ you have this movie, it's not even out yet all this. ⁓ I'm like, I'm not gonna lend it to you. Because I don't know where it's gonna end up. What if they ripped it and put it on the internet like And then apparently it's linked to me. I don't know. So I just always was like, Nope, sorry, can't hook you up with that. ⁓ and one year I actually got, I don't know how they pick it. It's just like a lottery thing, but I got picked to be on the ⁓ nomination board. Tita Lors: That's so cool. Robin Axline: Yeah, it was really cool because they sent me like literally a booklet and it was like anything from like major releases to like the weirdest indie stuff. Yeah, I do. Except some of it was like yikes unwatchable like is this a student film kind of vibes? Some of it I was like, is this really up for it? I just wow. Okay. I mean, no judges. I'll watch anything but ⁓ Tita Lors: and you love the indie stuff. Robin Axline: So it took me a lot of time to consume. Tita Lors: Mm-hmm. All of that, yeah. Robin Axline: a lot. mean, yeah, because they sent a lot of digital stuff too, but I seriously just kept getting like DVDs like almost every day for a month or so. And then some of it they didn't even send, which was so weird. So I had to kind of like do some digging myself and look it up. But I felt really good because I watched so many movies and I got so serious about it and I rated it. And then I had to have my nominations in by a certain amount of time. Tita Lors: ⁓ huh. Robin Axline: And so it just felt really fulfilling to watch it on TV. Cause I was like, Oh, I had something to do with that. Um, but year to year, I do have to vote for like best casting, best ensemble. the, now they're called the, well, they were called the SAG awards, but now they're called the actor awards for something. It's like this really long name now. Tita Lors: ⁓ yes. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Is it, I thought it was just the actor awards, because it was like the SAG AF, SAG AFTRA award something something, now it's just the actor awards. Robin Axline: Yeah, but the name, the new name is like... ⁓ the afterwords presented by SAG-AFTRA. Tita Lors: ⁓ yeah, yeah, yeah, it's that. Robin Axline: is the long name but ⁓ so I I voted not too long ago for the awards and here's a little rant short rant but I was very frustrated because currently I don't have Netflix and that's the only way you could watch it this past year and I was like really like and Tita Lors: ⁓ huh. Yeah, what if we don't have this? We don't have access. Robin Axline: Yeah, and then I'm on their list, like, all thanks for voting. You can watch it on Netflix. And I was expecting them to do, like, a link, like a freebie. Not so much. And so I didn't even watch it, because I was like, and then I was just like, I almost got a protest. I didn't want to look it up afterwards. I did look up who won, but. Tita Lors: Here's a login. Yeah What you ⁓ huh. Robin Axline: it just really got in my craw, you know? Like they couldn't, okay, sweet, you got to deal with Netflix, but the actors that want to watch it. then, yeah, and then here in New York, they actually had kind of like a faux award ceremony. They took over a movie theater in Manhattan and SAG actors could go watch it on the big screen. Tita Lors: Yeah. Yeah, they can't. They have to vote, but they can't. ⁓ cool. Robin Axline: And I was like, that sounds medium fun, but... Once I thought about going, was already- the RSVPs were already full, so I couldn't go anyways. Anywho, end rant. Tita Lors: Hahaha ⁓ So I actually have DVDs from that. I don't know how they got sent to me or why. I don't think I'm on anything. There was a time where I thought about like being a seat filler also. But I never, yeah, they just got sent to the house I was living at or somebody that I do know. We weren't dating, we were like maybe seeing each other from time to time. Like he had given me some DVDs, so good thing I didn't just trash them because who knows where they would have ended up. I still have them. ⁓ But maybe I should get rid of them so nobody gets in trouble. Robin Axline: One day I just had a day where I just broke a bunch and threw them the trash. ⁓ But also, I was gonna mention real quick on that note, this year and last year they automatically sent digital instead of the DVDs. And then if you wanted the DVDs, you could request them. But this year, it was even crazier because there was only one show that were sending out DVDs and everything else was digital and no DVDs. So I'm like really happy about that going green because like it's such a waste and not everybody has DVD players anymore, so. Tita Lors: Yeah. Yeah, well who does? I have, you have to, my, even my computer doesn't have like a CD, DVD player anymore. You have to buy like the attachment to do that. I was like, oh, that's lame. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. So anyways, you might be wondering why I'm asking all these questions and how I gots. Robin Axline: Yes, I am like so confused. Let me in. Tita Lors: Yes, how did we get here? Okay. I'm gonna walk you through my thought process here and how I got to this topic. I was watching the Oscars, AKA the Academy Awards, and at some point, or the other way around, whatever, the same thing. So Kieran Culkin, he accepted an award for Sean Penn, right? Robin Axline: Okay. Yes. Tita Lors: And he said, Sean Penn couldn't be here this evening or didn't want to. So then he accepted it. And I'm like, do people do that? I didn't know, you know, the scene from Hamilton. didn't know that was something a person could do. I wasn't aware that was something a person could do. Yeah, that starts playing in my head. So I started looking up like, who else has done that? And there are people who refuse to accept the award. Robin Axline: Yeah, yeah. Tita Lors: who refused to participate in the award ceremony out of protest, ⁓ people who have declined it, lots of things. I'm like, interesting. ⁓ So then I was like, that's a good topic right there. ⁓ And then, you know, of course we know award shows, we talked about earlier, Oscar's a white, right? That like, rife with just controversy, you know, related to racism, but also a lot of virtue signaling for people. on there as well. And I was like, those are great topics as well. So I was like, what do I do? My ADHD brain just can't choose. And then I landed on a story about how and why the Academy Awards was created. Do you do you know anything about this? Robin Axline: Okay. Really? I mean, it's probably somewhere in my brain, but yeah. Let's go. All right, let's go. Tita Lors: ⁓ uh-huh. Yes. ⁓ Robin, buckle up. This is so good. I was like, wow, what an ass. Okay. So the very first award show was the Academy Awards. It was on May 16th, 1929. It was a brief 15 minute awards ceremony held with either 250 or 270 attendees. somewhere around that. So a lot of people just the best dressed of the industry all showed up to this dinner. It was not that crazy, honestly. It was virtually media free. People didn't hear about the winners until three months later. It was somehow announced. I don't know. It just said by the media. And I was like, newspaper. Yeah. Yeah. And then in the following years after that winners were announced the night of via the newspapers until about 1953 because that's when it started to get televised And they didn't always use sealed envelopes. Do you know why they switched to sealed envelopes? Robin Axline: Yeah, go ahead. I can only imagine. Tita Lors: Yeah, kids, give me, what's your best imaginative guess as to why? No, it wasn't that crazy. Somehow the LA Times got a hold of the results and they posted the results before the show. Yeah, jerks with a fudge. Right? Exactly. ⁓ Okay, so other shows didn't start coming out until the 1940s, like the Emmys and the Tonys and all that. Those happened later. So this was like the first award show in at least in America, in Hollywood specifically, ⁓ that ever got created. So does the name Louis B. Mayer mean anything to you? Robin Axline: Spoiler alert, yeah. Yes. Tita Lors: Okay, what does it mean to you? Robin Axline: Like big time film producer-y kind of guy like head of the studio vibes. All right. Tita Lors: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. Okay. Yay. She's in the industry. She knows her stuff. I keep trying not to cuss. Shuff. Robin Axline: I know some things. Some stuff. Tita Lors: Okay, how old were you when you learned what MGM stood for? You Robin Axline: ⁓ coming from a dad who's like a film buff, I probably learned about it when I was like, I don't know, eight years old or something like that, but... Tita Lors: Ugh, yeah. Yeah, I've always wondered and I never knew, but apparently it's because of ⁓ Mayor, right? So him, so he is a Canadian American film producer and he founded his own film. agency company, whatever. ⁓ But it didn't really start hitting off until he joined up with two other people and they were Metro, Goldwyn and Mayor. And so that's how MGM got created. Did I miss anything? Okay, yeah. All right, so that was in 1924. ⁓ A little bit about him. He was born in Ukraine. But he's Canadian American, I don't know. So he must have gone to Canada. Robin Axline: Well, don't know, essentially. Yeah. Tita Lors: at some point and then eventually he made his way to LA. I didn't want to focus too much on him and his history. I wanted to focus on other things. Yeah, exactly. ⁓ But he allegedly believed in wholesome entertainment. That could be argued, but, you know, let's let's get into other stuff. yeah, a different day. We don't have to talk about him. That's not what's important right now. Robin Axline: ⁓ Yeah, there's some, yeah, anywho. That's for another day. Maybe. Tita Lors: ⁓ So at some point, Mayer wanted to build a beach house in Santa Monica, and he had hoped to enlist MGM set designers to build the home for him. But unions were starting to form and that was increasing the cost of labor for film studios. So then his outside, right, because this has nothing to do with films, this has to do with his own personal stuff. So his outside project would cost him a lot more money. So we're like... recent union contracts that were signed. So just everything was getting more expensive. He managed to find a way around it by, but then he realized that other people in the industry would soon follow suit, right? Like actors and writers and producers and all of those people. So then Mayor, And a few of his buddies joined together to create the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences to prevent Hollywood from further unionizing. He used some cult leader tactics, probably, to convince 36 actors, directors, writers, technicians, and producers that they would be part of an elite organization of Academy members that would improve the working conditions in Hollywood. And the ceremony itself was just a complete afterthought. Robin Axline: What? Wow. Yeah, that's crazy. Tita Lors: Right? Yeah. Yeah, I was like, OK, that's not great. Robin Axline: ⁓ Yeah, I didn't know that. Tita Lors: Yeah, I added the whole cult leader tactics part because you know, remember that training that we did recently this week? We're just like, they're teaching us the methods of like how to join this thing and they're using it on us at the same time. ⁓ my gosh. So smart. Yes, and it's working. People are so. Robin Axline: Yes, yes, Yeah. Yeah. This is it. In action. Yeah. Tita Lors: bike into it. ⁓ my goodness, good for these people at the training that I did learn some stuff, but still that was interesting to experience. Okay, so Yeah, so the awards was actually only created because people were starting to notice that promises were not being kept. And surprise, surprise, working conditions were not actually improving despite many industry people joining the AMPA, AMPAS, AMPA. Anyways, you know what I'm talking about. The actors. ⁓ What is it? the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences. There we go. Yeah. So to create some sort of legitimacy to showcase the talents of Hollywood, ⁓ or and to showcase the talents of Hollywood, the first Academy Award ceremony was put together in 1929 to honor films released from August 1927 to July 1928. I already asked you about mental floss and if you used it. ⁓ Robin Axline: Yes, ⁓ yes, yes, okay. Tita Lors: because most of this comes from Mental Floss, a little bit from Wikipedia and a few other sources, but Mental Floss has this great unique way of writing. The writers there are amazing. And there's just no better way to paraphrase this. I'm just gonna read it directly from them. So we know that a nervous studio had created the ampus, ampus? To curb union formations in Hollywood and to exert more control over his employees. But what about the award ceremony? Was it established for an underhanded purpose as well? Yeah, it apparently was. ⁓ So in his biography, Lionwood of Hollywood, the life and legend of Louis B. Mayer, he was quoted saying, I found that the best way to handle filmmakers was to hang medals all over them. If I got them cups and awards, they'd kill themselves to produce what I wanted. That's why the Academy Awards was created. Yeah. Yeah, I was like, oh my gosh, this guy. So by creating the Academy Awards, Mayer hoped to bring the five branches of the film industry under his control and mitigate labor disputes without unions. Robin, quiz time. Can you tell me all the names of the branches? I said it earlier, but do you know them? Yes. Yeah, but also just the what would you guess are the branches of the film industry like the major ones, people who could unionize if they wanted to. Robin Axline: ⁓ you're talking about like crew kind of stuff or? ⁓ yeah, like, yeah, lighting, production, directors, actors, obviously. Tita Lors: Mm-hmm. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Robin Axline: I guess... I mean... I already said directors. Cinematographers. I don't know, I'm losing it now. Tita Lors: Yep. You got, I'll give you four out of the five, because guess crew could fall under technicians. So it's technicians, directors, actors, which you got. And then the fifth one is writers. Robin Axline: ⁓ my god, can we just like edit this out? I feel horrible. ⁓ no. I guess I wasn't... ⁓ dang, that was an important one. Tita Lors: Hahaha Yeah, no. It's okay. We all know that you value them. ⁓ Yes, and they're very important. Robin Axline: Plus I was out of work for a very long time with the writer's strike, yeah, anywho. Tita Lors: Yes. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Okay. So that's the not so fun stuff. Let's go into something a little bit more fun. Who is Oscar? Why is the award? What do you know? Any of the lore around why the award is called the Oscar? Robin Axline: I don't remember. I don't. Tita Lors: Okay, so technically the awards. So technically the award that winners are receiving is called the Academy Award of Merit. The designer of the statue was based on, sorry, I can't read. The design of the statue was based on a design by Cedric Gibbons, a MGM art director at the time. I couldn't find a true origin story for the Oscar, but there are a few theories as to where this name came from. So one of them, is ⁓ allegedly a former Academy librarian and later executive director Margaret Herrick thought the statue looked like her uncle Oscar and staff members. So staff members heard the story and they just started calling it the Oscar as well. Um, and then there's another one where Betty Davis came up with the name in 1936 because the back of the Oscar reminded her of her husband when he got out of the shower and his middle name was Oscar. Yeah, there was another one too, but I was like, I don't think that's, I don't think it's that one. Robin Axline: ⁓ boy. Such a Betty Davis thing to do. Tita Lors: Yeah. Yeah. So the other one is, so ⁓ Foster Hirsch, author of Hollywood and the Movies of the 50s. He said that the first confirmed reference to the Academy Award as an Oscar was in 1934, when Sidney Skolsky, a Hollywood columnist, referred to Catherine Hepburn's first win as best actress as an Oscar. He thought, so this is a quote from the book, guess. He thought that the ceremonies were pompous and self-important and he wanted to deflate them in his column. So Skolsky referred to the statuette as an Oscar in a reference to Oscar Hammerstein I, a theater owner who became the butt of jokes amongst vaudeville communities. Is that the one you know? Yeah, yeah, so those are those are the three I decided to highlight, but which story do you think is likely more the origin story or which origin story do you like better? Robin Axline: Well, I do like the cheekiness of the shower. I kind of wish it was that. I'm not sure. Yeah. Tita Lors: You Yeah. So it's not likely that one because it started getting referred to as an Oscar before 1936. Robin Axline: Okay, ⁓ true. Yeah, I'm sure it's not that I just would like it to be. Tita Lors: Yeah. I know, I like the Foster Hirsch, the Foster Hirsch reason because it seems a lot more petty. Yeah, you guys are just too uppity. I'm bring you guys down a notch. Yeah, okay. So in conclusion, the pettiest reason to create a whole ass system to control and manipulate an industry was created by mayor all because he couldn't build a beach house for cheap. Robin Axline: pretty damn petty. ⁓ Tita Lors: Yeah, right. I was like, no way, this can't be true. That can't be the reasoning. But then that quote directly from his book is like, wow. Robin Axline: Yeah, that's so crazy. Tita Lors: Mm-hmm. Rough. Robin Axline: Hmm. Yeah, that's rough. Tita Lors: Yeah, makes you makes you look at the awards a little bit differently because everyone's so and he's right. Every this is the award that a lot of people want. It is very meaningful for people in the industry to get this specific award. And I wonder if they all know that it was created to control and manipulate them. Sorry, guys. Robin Axline: sorry guys, sorry for that news. If you just... Yeah, I've... Right. ⁓ that's so funny. Tita Lors: Yeah, if you didn't know, now you know. Yeah, so I thought I would end this section on a joke. It's not really that funny, but it is to me. It's from Reddit by Magic Nipple. Robin Axline: Okay. Tita Lors: He said, hey, you seen mayor lately? Which one? The Oscar mayor. Robin Axline: that it's... We need to get a soundboard, I'm thinking. Yeah. Tita Lors: We do. Yeah, it's really not that funny. It just was to me because I had been doing all that research and I was like, Hardy har har har. Robin Axline: ⁓ yeah. That's awesome. Yeah. One time the Oscar Mayer Rainer truck came to my parents' ⁓ Tita Lors: I want... Why? What was it? Robin Axline: It was like somebody that we knew was like, ⁓ can we swing by their house? And so then we all went running out and they gave us like the little whistles and it's pretty sick. Yeah, stuff fun. Yeah. Tita Lors: ⁓ that's so cool. Yeah. How many kids can say that? Okay. Well, hard, another hard turn to a new segment called petty therapy advice. All right. So, Robin Axline: therapy advice Tita Lors: this is from r slash therapy ⁓ and it's called therapist said the R word by cutie cactus Robin Axline: Aw, cutie cactus. I love that. Tita Lors: Right? Yeah. Okay. So just based off of that alone, thoughts, feelings, reactions. Immediately, no was my response. My little brother, 17, has a personal therapist and a psychiatrist. My mom just informed me that while on the phone with his therapist, she said that while she was discussing treatment plans for my brother, the psychiatrist called my brother retarded. Yeah. It gets worse. Don't hold it in. Don't hold back. Okay. I guess initially his therapist gave my mom a clinical diagnosis. My mom didn't understand what she meant. So to dumb it down, she said basically that he's retarded, but I'm not supposed to use that word anymore. Yeah, your face. Yes. Robin Axline: What? Tita Lors: Yeah. of her reasons for this diagnosis is that he doesn't do well with eye contact. ⁓ fuming and my mom isn't the best at problem solving. Should this be reported? Is this not some type of illegal? I'm so uncomfortable. I also can't help but feel like this is medical racism. I don't know that it's a thing, but I can see where they're going with that. so where do you stand on the R word? Robin Axline: don't I mean I I'm so glad that it's not common anymore I think unfortunately it became one of those words where it didn't have any meaning behind it in I'd say especially like in the 90s I think a lot of people would say it and I'm just so glad that it's like out of this next generation's vernacular I hope I think Tita Lors: Yeah. I don't think it is. Robin Axline: ⁓ no. ⁓ And I remember when it was like this huge deal when Jennifer Aniston said it. I believe it was like, I don't know if it was an interview or something, but she was like briefly canceled ⁓ for saying it. Tita Lors: like about herself or somebody else. Robin Axline: No, I don't remember the context, but I just remember that was when it was like in the media, like, ⁓ the R word is not good because Jennifer Aniston said it and she got a bunch of flack for it. But she's pretty uncancelled ball other than that, I think. I think everybody forgot that now. But. Yeah, I just remember whenever I think about the art, I think about when Jennifer Aniston said it. Tita Lors: Yeah. Yeah, I don't even remember that happening. Hahaha! Robin Axline: So my stance is like it's not good and it's not even a clinical ⁓ like way to describe it anymore I believe. Tita Lors: you Yeah. ⁓ yeah, it definitely is not a clinical way to describe it. We don't use that term anymore. I do still use it, but usually in reference to myself, but as like a, like a knee jerk reaction, because, you know, 90s, we said it all the time. I'm like, ⁓ my God, what a tard. Why, why did I do that? ⁓ my gosh. Like, you know, those forehead smacking moments. ⁓ so in reference to myself being like, ⁓ you tard you like, what's wrong with you? But I can't imagine me saying about anyone else. Robin Axline: time. Yeah. Tita Lors: to describe anyone else or whatever and I definitely cannot imagine using it in like a clinical situation. I would fire myself. I feel like I'm so sorry. You deserve so much better. Robin Axline: ⁓ Yeah. Tita Lors: they asking if this is reportable. ⁓ and just, know you can't specifically answer that question, but it's, ⁓ don't, if this ever sees this is from like two years ago. So I don't think it matters anymore, but it's not for anybody out there who's wondering. ⁓ I don't think ⁓ Yeah. I don't think it is, even if it was, I don't think that they would do anything about it because there are so many other things that are a priority that the using unprofessional language probably is the last thing on their list of things that are being reported because it's not it's not illegal. and it borders maybe unethical, probably not even. And those are the only two reasons why you would report something as if it's illegal or if it's unethical. And I don't think it's either of those things, sorry. ⁓ But it is for sure unprofessional and that's not great. Yeah. What advice would you give this person? Robin Axline: It's really hard, especially with kind of a parent that's not real activated, it sounds like. Tita Lors: Mm-hmm. Or I mean, they sounded activated, but they didn't know what to do about it. They're like, I don't think, yeah. Robin Axline: not yeah well truthfully I like I don't here's the other issue which sucks about healthcare is that sometimes you're stuck with the providers that you have because my first go-to I mean it takes sometimes I think it just takes a while to somebody else that's in your network I guess so my first thought was just like definitely ditch Tita Lors: Yeah, that I agree with. Yeah. Robin Axline: ditch him because you can find there's so many ⁓ people that actually care and would not be using words like that. Tita Lors: Mm hmm. Yeah, I agree with you. I do agree. It's hard to find a new therapist, a new provider, ⁓ especially through insurance. These days, these days, especially, it's really hard because everyone's got like a waiting list and just. You have to have a very specific insurance, because not everybody's on the same panel. It's super hard. And then there's clinicians like me. I don't even take insurance, because it's a scam. ⁓ That's my stance on insurance. ⁓ a scam. Yeah, yeah, exactly. ⁓ Yeah. Robin Axline: Yeah, so I mean, they could be paying out of pocket too. Didn't mean to interrupt, but yeah, they didn't say. That was my first take, because I've had experience where it's just a freaking nightmare. So yeah. Tita Lors: Yeah, exactly. Right. So I think I would say definitely ditch that, whichever, was psychiatrist. That's not okay. There are so many different ways to describe what's happening. ⁓ even if ⁓ parent, the caregiver, whoever isn't fully understanding how you're describing it, then find a different way to say ⁓ Like they're, you know, developmentally, their learning is in this ⁓ in this area like age group and we would likely expect them to be in this age group and this is what we're noticing and describing it differently like that and there are also like more colloquial ways to say that too right because a lot of the comments were actually pissing me off They're like, what's the context behind it? You know, if the clinicians trying to help them to understand and someone gave an example of like a nurse had to ask this patient a few different ways if they needed or wanted something and they didn't understand it until she said it specific, very colloquial way. And maybe perhaps someone might say dumbed down way or may like lay person, but she tried literally everything else. first to try to communicate with this person. That was like her last resort of like, yeah, like I got to ask this question, right? So there's that, but also there's a different, it's not that much of a difference, but there's a difference between a nurse doing something like that and like a psychiatrist who has had several more years of education and for you to not find a different way to connect with your patient and a better way to explain to your patient without calling them retarded or without calling them like, without having to tell the parent that I'm dumbing it down for you. Yeah, that's not okay. It's never okay. And I don't know if the psychiatrist specifically said that, but if the patient or the patient caregiver feels like you're dumbing it down for me. I would hate for anybody to feel that way as a clinician myself. So I don't think it's okay at all. I don't care what the content, the context is. Yeah, exactly. Right? Like I get hit, maybe there was good intention behind it. Like I want to do with this and say it this way because I'm trying to bridge the gap that, you know, like the knowledge gap, but the impact. Robin Axline: Yeah, I don't think that matters. Truly. Tita Lors: was that's not ever a good impact to call somebody retarded. It's like hurtful and mean and not okay. And language matters. Yeah, okay, there was something somebody said that I thought was good. they talking about how some people would actually prefer, they refer to themselves ⁓ with certain ⁓ right? Like somebody might refer to that, like an older person who grew up where it was okay to say ⁓ that diagnosis, ⁓ they might to refer to themselves that way. Or there's like specific ways that people refer to themselves because there is. even in saying like intellectual disability or differently abled or whatever there is some connotation to it and some people don't feel good about it like ⁓ like Ryan was telling me that himself included and other people in the military don't like to refer to PTSD as PTSD specifically because they don't like the implications of it being a disorder We don't agree, but I, but I understand why. ⁓ right. And he's like, I don't have a disorder. I'm having a perfectly normal reaction to a trauma that has happened. And I'm like, you're absolutely right. You are. And it, the disorder isn't you it's in the way that you're now reacting to things that are not your trauma. Right? Like it's the way that it's impacting you in regular life. That is not your trauma. You're having a totally normal reaction and it's impacting other things too. And that's the gap there, but I can see why. So with him, I'm just like, okay, that's your language. We're going to use your language and that's okay because this, you know, if you're, if this is what you're experiencing, then I don't want to make you feel bad. Um, about it. Exactly. Yeah. Like this is clinically for me. This is how I understand it and this is how you're experiencing it. And since it's your experience, that's what matters right now. Robin Axline: Yeah, you can't tell them it's wrong. mean, Tita Lors: for listeners, what would you have done if somebody, if you heard that somebody said this about someone you loved and cared about, how would you have reacted? What would you encourage that caregiver to do? Or is this even problematic for you? I hope it is. If you're listening to us, I hope it is. It should be. Robin Axline: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, but you know, ⁓ if you got, just let us know. Whatever you think, whatever your reaction is. Tita Lors: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, true, because there might be a really valid reason for that. Like I said, language matters to people, right? And if that's how you would prefer, then I'm curious why. And at the end of the day, it's just a word that unfortunately got used in a horrible way and now has that negative connotation to it. And now we shouldn't use it, ⁓ or it's difficult to use it even in the proper way now because it's got that connotation behind it and we have to be should and must be very mindful about that. Yeah. Okay, well, that's the show. I think everyone should know that Robin has been working really hard for your engagement and interactions. I made an email account for you guys to reach out. But Robin put together the website, the Instagram, our T line for you guys to call into. There's like a submissions forum on the website for you to send in your submissions so we can read your stories. She's been working so hard, everyone. I thought in my head that the T-line was like super aspirational later down the line, but it's here. It's done already. Robin Axline: It's true, folks. We have a tea line. I'm like turning red. Tita Lors: You're getting so bashful. Robin Axline: Anyway, yes, please check out our website, tell us your stories. We're gonna have such a blast and it's all gonna be interactive with our dear listeners. Tita Lors: Mm-hmm. Yes, indeed. All right, do you have anything else? Robin Axline: If you see something, say something. Tita Lors: Yes, indeed. All right. Well, that's all we've got for you today. If you enjoyed hanging out with us, please, please, please subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or Deezer. And if you don't want to, yeah, subscribe if you don't want to miss our next episode. And until next time, fuck it. Robin Axline: Stay petty. Bye. Tita Lors: Bye everyone!