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Fictional Women Around the World: The Guide · Stuff Mom Never Told You

• 0:05
  Speaker 1: Hey, this is Annie and welcome to Stephan. Never told
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: you a production of iHeartRadio, And yes it is just
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: to me today, or there's actually going to be a
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: couple of instances in the future where we might have
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: to do solo episodes because of traveling. But Somantha, she
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: got COVID and is not feeling well. She's doing fine,
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: but you know, it's not fun and we've been in touch.
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: Everything is good, but send her all the wishes to
• 0:44
  Speaker 1: get better. So I will be doing this by myself today.
• 0:49
  Speaker 1: And I actually chose this character because this is a
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: sub sub sub subsub segment of fictional women around the world.
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: I chose this character because she's not going to be
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: here because she has not seen the latest season of
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: what we do in the Shadows. That being said, there
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: are going to be spoilers, but they're light spoilers for
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: the most recent season. I know the rule about spoilers
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: is like ten years, so the earlier seasons, yes, will
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: be spoiled, but I don't think so, like not major really,
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: but the most recent season did just end. So if
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: you want to you know, you know, stop and come back,
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: then please do please come back. So, yeah, today we're
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: talking about the Guide, also known as the Floating Woman,
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: who is played by Kristin Shaw on the FX show
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: What We Do in the Shadows, which not a sponsor currently.
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: She is a vampire associated with the Vampire Council. And
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: if you've never seen the show or listen to our
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: other episodes, we've done about it. We've done Naudia, We've
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: done Officer O'Leary. I also was on an episode of
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: movie Crush about What We Do in the Shadows, But
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: if you've never seen it, didn't listen to those or
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: don't remember them. Basically, it's sort of a mockumentary about
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: vampires living together and the silly situations they get themselves in.
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: It's a very like, oh, vampires have to do dishes
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: to kind of comedy. And so the Vampiric Council is
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: the ruling body. They weigh in on vampiric rules, and
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: there are like localized bodies and national and international bodies,
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: so like our government is set up, you know, you
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: have your local council in state and then yeah, you
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: get it. This specific one is Staaten Island base that's
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: where they live and it's composed of a glut of
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: cameos from other vampiric media is very very funny. So
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: we don't know much about the Guide's human life before
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: she became a vampire. What we do know is that
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: she's been a vampire since the fifteenth cent tree, and
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: in her early vampiric days she led a very hedonistic lifestyle.
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: She later called her behavior at that time consistent of
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: that of a bad vampire, doing things like leading the
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: inquisition and dancing under the Seven Veils without a vail.
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: And she had an affair with a vampire hunter of
• 3:21
  Speaker 1: the van helsing line, And this is something all of
• 3:24
  Speaker 1: this we find out through her in heavy quotes therapy
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: sessions with Laslow, who is another vampire one of the
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: main characters, because when we first meet her, she is
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: very by the book. She's very like followed the rules
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: or else. Also, she kind of has like a nun
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: look going on, like she's in black and her hair
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: is white, and I don't know, she's very by the book.
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: But this affair led to the Vampiric Council assigning her
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: to assist the local temple of the Blood Devourers branch
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: in the seventeen fifties, and she carried out this duty
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: four centuries. Over time, she repressed and even forgot her memories,
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: including her name, until Laslo helped her recover some of them.
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: She's still just the guide. We don't know her name.
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: Her affair also explained her attraction to Guillermo, who has
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: been housing blood. She first appeared as a swarm of
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: ravens that solidified into a woman after the Vampires, the
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: main vampires of the show committed the crime of killing
• 4:31
  Speaker 1: another vampire and demanded that they present themselves at the
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: Temple of the Blood Devours so the Vampiric Council could
• 4:39
  Speaker 1: assess their guilts, and when they were found guilty, she
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: led them to their execution, where they eventually were rescued.
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: And then later we see her again when she presents
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: the vampires with this videotape containing a message from the
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: Supreme Worldwide Vampiric Council, and on the tape tape, Viago,
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: who is played by creator Taiko with tit informs them
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  Speaker 1: that since Schillermo murdered about seventy percent of the vampires
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: in their area, they were now to lead the Vampient
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: Council of the Eastern Seaboard of the New World. The
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: Guide agrees to help them, even though I believe she
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: says something like gets built on my pay grade and yeah,
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  Speaker 1: as her name suggests, she guides them in their roles
• 5:25
  Speaker 1: and responsibilities. They do often ignore her, but she's really
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: knowledgeable about all kinds of text, spells items. She's sort
• 5:32
  Speaker 1: of the character who moves a lot of exposition along
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: when you're like, what is this thing? She knows what
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  Speaker 1: it is. She knows how to do like a swap
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: body spell. She's yeah, she's very very knowledgeable. So when
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: Naja decides to turn the Vampient Council into a club,
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  Speaker 1: like a nightclub or vampires, the Guide is at first
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  Speaker 1: very very very resistant, and this is when Laslow steps
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: into to have these therapy sessions with her to recover
• 6:06
  Speaker 1: some of her memories of her more wild past. And
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: after remembering some of that, the Guide agrees to make
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: the headquarters of the Vampire Council into a club, and
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: she becomes something of a right hand for Naja. When
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: running the club. She does the task Naja assigns her,
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: but the club is ultimately unsuccessful and Naja burns it
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: down I think for insurance money. But she did it
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: all wrong and dedicated an insurance money. So that brings
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: us to this most recent season, where the Guide feels
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: that the vampires are her friends now, especially Nauja, so
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: she returns to the vampire's house in Stanton Island and
• 7:00
  Speaker 1: only to find that they are being very, very clique
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  Speaker 1: and keeping her out of the group and often outright
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: ignoring her. She tries several things to earn their friendship,
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  Speaker 1: and this eventually culminates into her basically staging an intervention
• 7:16
  Speaker 1: until they are able to convince the Guide with misleading
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: footage that they do in fact like her. Shall, the
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: actor who plays the Guide, has described the story as
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: a relatable one of feeling left out, like you don't
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: belong anywhere, and it is interesting too because that gets
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: exacerbated when you're an immortal being, I guess. From the
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: official website, here's a quote. The Guide, portrayed by Christian Shall,
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: is a wealth of knowledge and always willing to help
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: if only anyone would ever ask her. Now that she's
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: free of the responsibilities of the Vampire Council and Naja's nightclub,
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: she's happy to have more time to spend with her
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: friends who don't seem to even notice that she's around.
• 7:59
  Speaker 1: It's hard fitting in and hanging out when everyone else
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: has known each other for hundreds of years. And I
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: do think there's a really interesting thing going on with
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: the idea of the Guide wanting to have friends, wanting
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: to fit in somewhere, and especially wanting Nada's friendship and
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: that whole aspect of female friendship that we talk about
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: all the time. And there's a very funny, frustrating quote
• 8:29
  Speaker 1: where the Guide is talking to Naja and not just
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: says I have no close female friends anymore, and the
• 8:40
  Speaker 1: Guid's like none and you know, they're kind of One
• 8:47
  Speaker 1: of the jokes at the end was, you know, vampires
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: aren't great people, will yeah, jokes and commentaries not great people.
• 8:57
  Speaker 1: And so I don't want to say that the Guide
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: is guiltless here because she did kind of try to
• 9:04
  Speaker 1: trick them in a lot of ways, but also they
• 9:06
  Speaker 1: were not great to her either. But yeah, she was
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: a main character this season. She had like a card
• 9:15
  Speaker 1: in the beginning the opening credits, and it was fun.
• 9:19
  Speaker 1: It was fun watching her involved. I did see a
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: lot of people just as her at Dragon Con. So
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: I think we actually are going to have some more
• 9:27
  Speaker 1: vampire content that I'm excited about, and this just felt fitting,
• 9:31
  Speaker 1: And yeah, I would love to hear people's thoughts suggestions.
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: I know a lot of you have sent in suggestions,
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: but I really wanted one that I could do by
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: myself and would be contained for this particular episode without Samantha.
• 9:48
  Speaker 1: But just know that I do have a list of them,
• 9:50
  Speaker 1: so keep those coming. You can email us at Steffidemomstuff
• 9:53
  Speaker 1: at iHeartMedia dot com. You can find us on Twitter
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: at mom Stuff podcast, or in Instagram and TikTok at
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: stuff I Never Told You. We have a tea public
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: store and we have a book. Please go order it.
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: You can do so at stuff. You should read books
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: dot com. Thanks as always to a super producer, Christina,
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: our executive producer Maya, and our contributor Joey, And thanks
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: to you for listening. Stuff I Never Told You is
• 10:15
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• 10:17
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• 10:19
  Speaker 1: wherever you listen to your favorite shows.