Latest / Ministry Coach: Youth Ministry Tips & Resources / How to Get Your Youth Ministry Team to Go From GOOD to GREAT!

Transcript

How to Get Your Youth Ministry Team to Go From GOOD to GREAT! · Ministry Coach: Youth Ministry Tips & Resources

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Today, we're talking about five ways to bring out the best in your youth ministry team.
• 0:17
  Speaker 2: Welcome to the Ministry Coach Podcast, where we give you weekly tips and tactics to help you fast track the growth and health of your youth ministry.
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: My name is Jeff Lascola and this is Kristen Laskola, and today we're going to be talking all about how you, as the leader, can get the best out of your teams.
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: So this could be any type of team that you work with your volunteer team, your student leadership team, your staff and intern team but your job as a leader is to draw out the best from people.
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: And how can we strategize to do that?
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: So, number one, it starts with you.
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: Healthy leaders are essential in the church.
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: I don't think it's any secret that the church, more than any other organization, needs emotionally, mentally, physically and spiritually healthy leaders, because every aspect of our ministry is a direct reflection of our health.
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: So a lot of times, youth pastors are looking for like what do I want to do next?
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: Like pastors are looking for like what do I want to do next?
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: Like what's the vision?
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: Like where are we going?
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: And those are all good questions to ask.
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: One of the thought patterns I would challenge you with is, instead of focusing on where you want to go, health might start with focusing on who you want to be first.
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: Not where should I go, but who should I be?
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: Because who we are, that is the direction of the ministry.
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: Like we are the vision of the ministry because, we've said it before, like you're the most important person in your ministry Not that you are like like inflated ego, most important part but without your health, the ministry health has no hope, like it's not going to be healthy without you.
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: So in order to bring out the best out of your team, it starts with you.
• 2:18
  Speaker 1: Think of yourself kind of like an athlete, right?
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: So an athlete shows up to games ready to go in shape, practiced up, warmed up.
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: They don't rely on the team to like well, make me better, make me into an athlete.
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: It's like well, I'm going to show up on my a game.
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: I've eaten, right.
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: I've drinking, right, I've drank it.
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: That's such a hard word like what's about drunk?
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: Drunken, yes, I've slept right, I've trained right, you know?
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: It reminds me of that verse in hebrews 12.
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: Or.
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: It's like run the race set out for you and so when we're running our race and we've been being diligent with our own health, then we can start to bring out the best in other people, because we bring our best every single day.
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: You know, if we show up consistently tired, it's really hard to have energy to bring the best out of other people, to want to pour into them, to want to challenge them, Like if you're just like aside from having a newborn, if that's you you get a pass, just survive, survive, nobody wants anything from you except your eyes, prop them open and you know, go about life.
• 3:37
  Speaker 1: But if we're, if you're in any other stage, like, if you are like, oh, I'm always tired and I just can't give it my best, okay, why are you always tired?
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: Let's get to the root of that.
• 3:46
  Speaker 1: Are you sick?
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: Are you not eating or sleeping?
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: Well, why, like, I just don't.
• 3:52
  Speaker 1: We've we've brought it up before, but I just don't know if we understand the impact of our physical health on the ministry.
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: Health, If we're always sick and so we're having to be out a lot, if we are emotionally drained and we have nothing to give to people and we are annoyed by everyone and everyone is like an interruption and we're in a toxic cycle of competition or jealousy or insecurity, that's emotional health.
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: If we are depressed or anxious, you know all the time, whatever it is for you, whatever that area of unhealth, I really challenge you to take control of that area and do whatever it takes to fix it so that you can be an effective minister of the gospel, so that you can run your race effectively, so that you can be the vision of the ministry, not just say, well, where should we go, but understanding that it stems from who you are.
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: First, and I love what Craig Groeschel says.
• 4:58
  Speaker 1: I've said it before, but he says everybody wins when the leader gets better.
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: Everybody wins when the leader gets better.
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: So when we are on our A game physically and we have energy to give and excitement, when we are feeling good mentally and can engage with people, when we have an emotional capacity to deal with hard stuff, you know we have the best chance at drawing out the best from other people.
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: So I think that's step one is you can't possibly hope to bring out someone's best if you're not at your best.
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: And, to be honest, it's kind of a lot of pressure to be at your best.
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: It's not like be at your best 24, seven or else, but like you, as a leader, really do have to be accountable to paying attention to your own health.
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: You know a lot of people are depending on you staying healthy and all the senses of the word that we're talking about.
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: Let's go on to.
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: Oh.
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: Well, actually, before we do that, how do we do that?
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: Well, read John 15, and our pastor loves to talk about the word remain or, depending on what version you're reading, abide, and it's over and over and over again, remain, remain, remain, remain, remain, remain.
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: He brings that up probably every other sermon, meaning it's not just that we have this incredible willpower to stay healthy or reflect Christ or be godly Like I decide today I'm going to be godly right, it's like, well, the power to do that comes from remaining abiding, being grafted in to Jesus because he says, apart from me, you can do nothing, like really nothing of significance.
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: And so staying connected to the source, you know, being constantly rooted in Jesus and our personal lives, that's where we get the power to be this kind of person that we're talking about, because you'll just kind of run out of steam on your own right, you know, after a while you can only muster up the strength to be disciplined in these areas so long.
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: But when you look to Jesus and you remember the why, you know that gives you the.
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: And I think a lot of times it's an accountability thing too.
• 7:26
  Speaker 1: He trusted me with this ministry and I'm going to have to give an account for it someday.
• 7:33
  Speaker 1: And that verse where it says not many of you should become teachers, my dear brothers, for in doing so you will incur stricter judgment.
• 7:41
  Speaker 1: That's a pretty sobering thought for a pastor of a stricter judgment Like.
• 7:46
  Speaker 1: That's a pretty sobering thought for a pastor of.
• 7:48
  Speaker 1: You will give an account to how you led, did you steward this responsibility?
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: Well, you know, I think, of the parable, of the talent, you know all of those things.
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: I think in the context of ministry it's like okay, we will have to answer for this someday and let that sink in of am I doing what I've been called to do to the best of my ability?
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: Well, in order to do that, I have to remain and I have to stay healthy.
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: So how do we do that?
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: How do we bring the best out of our team?
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: Well, number two relationships, relationships with people.
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: That's a number one when it comes to bringing out the best.
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: So, having to put in that relational work like above and beyond just their role and what they're doing for your ministry, do you treat them as a person before you treat them as a leader or an employee or whatever, and you feed that relational need and know about their personal life?
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: I would say a lot of my leaders love, love, love junior hires.
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: They're very good with students.
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: The reason they stay on my team for as long as they do is relational.
• 9:01
  Speaker 2: There is.
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: it fills a relational need that we all have and we have a lot of fun while doing it.
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: And I've said it before students come and go, you know, unfortunately, I wish I could keep my students forever right.
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: It's so hard to say goodbye, yet I want the team to stay as constant as possible.
• 9:24
  Speaker 1: So looking at your leaders as actual people, so it's not like every single conversation has to center around ministry and their small group and you know, how did your you know event go or whatever, but asking them about them, hey, whatever happened with this, and how's your son doing?
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: And you know, did you guys do anything this summer?
• 9:46
  Speaker 1: I don't know, but like it's always treating them as a person and being seen by you specifically, like connecting them with each other is a big deal, but connecting them with you is you just play a very specific role in the ministry and people underestimate what someone sitting in their seat like if you're the ministry leader, that care is amplified, right, the way that you care for them means just that much more.
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: And I don't know why that is, but you know, when you're at church and the head pastor or the head leader like stops everything they're doing to see how you're doing or talk to you or, you know, make a big deal about you, like it just means more.
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: I mean I guess it's cause you know like, well, everyone knows you and you're the one on stage or you're the one leading and it's like, oh, and you're mindful of me, right?
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: You know, depending on how big your ministry is, you know that could mean different things, but guaranteed your leaders, your team, want connection with you.
• 10:58
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: Specifically.
• 11:00
  Speaker 2: It's interesting.
• 11:00
  Speaker 2: As you were talking, I was thinking so.
• 11:03
  Speaker 2: The leaders crave that relational, you know connection and they love hanging out with each other, talking about your teams in specific, but it's the serving alongside of the relational like you guys do get along great, you have a lot of fun with each other, but if the serving piece wasn't there, it never would have come to fruition.
• 11:23
  Speaker 2: And it probably if you said hey guys, we're going to, we're going to get rid of student ministries, but let's all hang out still.
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: It would fizzle.
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you're right, you know but you guys can go and do retreats and you know serving on the weekend and on midweek and stuff, and it's like such a tight bond.
• 11:39
  Speaker 2: But it is also that serving that is in addition to the relational, which is a just interesting thing, yeah.
• 11:46
  Speaker 1: It's like this perfect blend, like we have this commonality of we're serving together and the students and we can, you know, share stories and experiences, but then, beyond that, we can talk about things other than just junior hires and the ministry and all that.
• 12:04
  Speaker 2: So you're right, and the longevity is also, whereas if you, if you went there and you said, um, I don't have, like, I just have the serving, but I don't have the relational connection, the longevity of that volunteer probably wouldn't last very long.
• 12:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, cause it'd be like, yeah, there has to be a purpose, for sure.
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: And so that kind of brings us to number three, where, like to bring out the best in your team, you have to be highly observational and talk to them a lot and figure out what gets them excited, what is like their sweet spot of gifting, of passion, like what do they love to do.
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: And I have miscast people before where it's like like I had a leader and I would always give him the opportunity to plan games and I just kind of thought, okay, he just doesn't know how to do it yet, but he'll get it.
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: Like he just needs some help.
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: We never got there and it started to get to the point where games aren't for everybody.
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: No, they're harder games they're harder than they look.
• 13:14
  Speaker 1: You know there's a lot that goes into planning the perfect game.
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: Executing the perfect game isn't the right setting is that.
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: You know there's so many different factors that go into it and he just could not quite get it and it got to the point where the students were even noticing and they were like let me guess So-and-so is playing the game today and I'm like, oh, like, okay, and I didn't fault him.
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: I thought I'm asking you to do something that is not within your gift set.
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: We've tried, I've trained you, I've given you ideas.
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: And I think he was not wanting to wave the white flag because like well, this is my job, you know I better do it.
• 13:57
  Speaker 1: But it was just clear, like this is not your passion nor your gift, and everyone felt it.
• 14:03
  Speaker 1: And so then I moved him into a different role.
• 14:06
  Speaker 1: That was he like, did some more administrative stuff and some more creative stuff and like, blew the doors off the thing, like so good at it.
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: So I think we have to be willing to look at what are people really good at, and if you just sense that it's not happening, like, you could keep like, nope, just keep trying, keep trying, keep trying.
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: Or you could say, hmm, all right, let's try something different for you.
• 14:38
  Speaker 1: But that takes intentionality to know your people so that you can keep bringing out the best in them.
• 14:45
  Speaker 1: So encourage them in their strengths.
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: There's a saying we say at our church called build on islands of strength.
• 14:52
  Speaker 1: Instead of worrying about what you're not good at, focus in on what you're really good at and become excellent at it.
• 15:01
  Speaker 1: You know, because, like, even if he had had all this training on doing games, I could tell the best he could ever give me would be like a, b minus, you know, and so I took that back.
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: I can lead games.
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: And then I put him in charge of something that aligned more with his natural gifts and passions and now I can expect like A pluses every single time, which is great for him because he feels excited, he feels encouraged, he has motivation and energy, instead of just scraping by doing this task because I asked him to do it.
• 15:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah, great for the ministry too, because then they're getting A plus work as well.
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: Absolutely, and then it keeps him around for longer because he likes what he's doing, and so you just have to be very intentional with putting people in their sweet spot Like where is it effortless for?
• 15:55
  Speaker 2: you.
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: What do you love and giving people and this is mostly talking for me, like my staff team.
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: This could work for your volunteers as well if you're going to use them in some different capacities, but for me it was developing my staff more of like all right, what can I, where can I put you that Like?
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: this is just your absolute sweet spot you know and you're loving, loving, loving it, and so you know, assume the best of them.
• 16:29
  Speaker 1: I think this could go one of two ways of like well, you're just lazy, you can't learn this, you're not trying.
• 16:37
  Speaker 1: I think it takes wisdom to kind of stop and say is this a work ethic thing, why you're not getting this, or is this a gifting thing, where it's just like this is not your strong suit?
• 16:50
  Speaker 1: Teaching is one of those things.
• 16:52
  Speaker 1: Like a lot of my interns over the years have wanted to try and teach.
• 16:57
  Speaker 1: I like to give an opportunity and I'll give you some feedback.
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: Sometimes you can tell pretty soon after you start this endeavor whether someone it's like oh you have some natural gifts, we just need to tighten this up.
• 17:14
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: Or like oh, I just don't know if this is ever going to be your A game.
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: Not a bad thing, not everyone has to be a teacher but, then you have to ask yourself well then, what is your A game?
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: And it takes that time to study your people, to figure out, Hmm, like I know you're here for a reason, I know you have gifts, I know you have strengths.
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: I just have to figure out, like, where to plug them in so that this thing illuminates.
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: You know, and sometimes and that's why it's like it's mostly your job as a leader, because a lot of times people don't know that about themselves it's like after watching them for a while, like I was watching one of my staff members a while ago and he had tried some different things and it was like all fine, but you could tell it wasn't like butter like oh my gosh, this was effortless, what you're meant to do.
• 18:15
  Speaker 1: So then I watched him in a different environment and watched him work in a different way and doing some different tasks and I'm like, oh my gosh, like you're better than I ever could have imagined.
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: You know, it was just he needed a different setting, he needed to kick into a different gear, he needed to try something different.
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: He, I think, was trying to be a leader, like a different leader than he actually was.
• 18:42
  Speaker 1: You know what I mean.
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: And so now you know, back then I kind of honed him into, like I think this is the kind of leader you are.
• 18:53
  Speaker 1: I think these are the kind of roles you're good at.
• 18:55
  Speaker 1: I think you were looking at everyone else on stage or teaching or leading big groups and doing stuff, and I think you were trying to be them, but I think you're actually this.
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: So it's not just asking people well, what are you good at?
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: What do you want to do?
• 19:10
  Speaker 1: I honestly think it's part of our job to observe and watch and help them unlock it, you know, because even if they're adults which all the people we're talking about probably are or close to it, they might not have the self-awareness or the experience to actually know you know.
• 19:33
  Speaker 1: And so they need someone who's paying attention to the nuances of their leadership and personality and gifts and strengths and say here's what I think you might be good at, let's try, and I'm going to support you doing it.
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: So along with that comes the next one is give relevant and constructive feedback keyword continuously.
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: So giving them feedback on how things are going like helps them hone their skill a little bit.
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: This is a big undertaking because you have to constantly observe people, take note of people and get people from point A to point B, from point B to point C, so, for example, debriefing an event.
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: Hey, I feel like this went really well.
• 20:23
  Speaker 1: I loved the part you played.
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: Here's where it could have gone a little better.
• 20:28
  Speaker 1: Maybe we should have put the arrival time a little bit earlier, because you didn't seem totally prepared with everything you had to do, or blah, blah, blah.
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: So you're giving them feedback continuously to help them sharpen the skills.
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: And think of it like this If somebody were to try to hire somebody that's been on your team for a year or two, could they hire them or would they wonder why did they never work on this with?
• 20:55
  Speaker 2: you.
• 20:56
  Speaker 1: So like, for example, someone who wants to be a youth pastor, who has been with you a year or two and their teaching gift hasn't grown at all.
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: Well, why not?
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: Is it that they just they're not meant to be teacher?
• 21:10
  Speaker 1: Or have you not been giving constructive feedback on a continual basis and helping them move in the direction where, hey, tomorrow somebody could hire them?
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: Because I've put in the work with this person to help them refine their teaching skills, helping them refine their leadership skills, helping them refine their stage presence, helping them refine their conflict resolution skills, helping them to refine their stage presence, helping them refine their conflict resolution skills, helping them to refine their character.
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: Sometimes it's a character thing with people where it's like hey, you know, the way you talk to people really rubs people the wrong way.
• 21:44
  Speaker 1: I know you don't mean it that way, but here's how you're coming across and it's this constant feedback with them out of.
• 21:51
  Speaker 1: But see, that's why relationship was at the top, because if you don't have a relationship with people, it's really hard to speak this brutally honest into their life.
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: One of my directors said once he said my favorite thing about you is that you're always real with me.
• 22:08
  Speaker 1: He's like, but I never take it offensively, he's like because we have such a great relationship that I can hear what you're saying without, like my defensiveness getting in the way, cause I know you love me and you prove that through the rest of our interactions and even through this.
• 22:29
  Speaker 1: I never yell like, oh, you did this wrong and what's wrong with you, you know.
• 22:32
  Speaker 1: But it's like hey, if you want to go to the next level, like you've got to get this under control.
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: Or you know, sometimes with people it's a scheduling thing, or you know, like little things, like you need to be on time, or just they should be very clear on what is their next step.
• 22:50
  Speaker 1: It be very clear on what is their next step, you know, at any given time they should know how can I be one step closer or more advanced in my leadership or in my skills, like what is the next thing that they're working on?
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: Don't let them sit idle, don't let just you know.
• 23:06
  Speaker 1: Like I think a lot of pastors get given to the temptation to maybe be on cruise control a little bit like, well, my team's doing good, Ministry's doing good, like what?
• 23:19
  Speaker 1: What more is there to do, you know?
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: But I feel like we can always not only be growing ourselves but growing the team around us of like, where's the next area I can challenge you in?
• 23:29
  Speaker 1: What's the next area I can help you in?
• 23:31
  Speaker 1: Where's the next area I can challenge you in.
• 23:33
  Speaker 1: What's the next area?
• 23:34
  Speaker 1: I can help you in.
• 23:35
  Speaker 1: What is the next area that you want to focus on?
• 23:37
  Speaker 1: And you continuing to give their feedback, like if they think of it also, in the way, if they were to take your job in a year, what would they need to know?
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: Like, don't gatekeep, don't hold things back.
• 23:47
  Speaker 1: Teach them everything you know, depending on what level they're at.
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: Sometimes I bring them into some conflict, like you don't have to use real names, but I'll say all right, I got an email from a parent and here's what they said and you know, here's what I thought.
• 24:01
  Speaker 1: And then I said this, and then you know, bringing them along for the ride of like this is how I'm going to do it.
• 24:07
  Speaker 1: Conflict resolution with parents go, if you sit in this seat, this is how you would handle it and what you need to know.
• 24:15
  Speaker 1: So don't isolate them from the real job by like, well, he's just the guy who sets up chairs, but we're constantly developing people in ministry and trying to bring out their best, because chances are there's so much more in them that they don't realize and that you don't realize.
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: But it's a process that is constantly moving.
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: So if you feel like you're in that place of stagnation with your leaders, like, yeah, we're all just chilling.
• 24:42
  Speaker 1: We're good.
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: That's going to get stale pretty quick, you know.
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: So who can you be challenging?
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: Who can you be challenging?
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: Where can you help people come alive and realize some things about themselves that maybe that's why God put them on your team, because he wanted you to excavate those things out of people?
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: You know, like that parable where it's like the master goes away and like the whole idea is don't hoard the gifts.
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: Multiply them right.
• 25:16
  Speaker 1: Be a good steward of what God has given you and, yeah, for us.
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: But also teaching people how to do that.
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: Like, hey, you've got gifts.
• 25:25
  Speaker 1: Like I want to see you use these.
• 25:27
  Speaker 1: I want to see you grow in these.
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: I want to see these multiply.
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: I want to see these being used for the kingdom.
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: See you grow in these.
• 25:32
  Speaker 1: I want to see these multiply.
• 25:33
  Speaker 2: I want to see these being used for the kingdom.
• 25:34
  Speaker 2: How can I help you do that?
• 25:36
  Speaker 2: And I don't think anybody like in their lane is unhappy you know, like when you're guiding them towards the things that they're good at and helping them excel in that.
• 25:44
  Speaker 2: I don't think most people would be like I don't, like.
• 25:46
  Speaker 2: This isn't for me.
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 25:48
  Speaker 2: You know, it's usually the opposite.
• 25:49
  Speaker 2: When, like you're saying, I'm planning games and it's not going well, I don't have any good ideas, I don't know how to execute them, that's.
• 25:55
  Speaker 2: I don't think anyone's in that situation going this is awesome, Right, so me, you know it's always the opposite.
• 26:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah, totally.
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: And and it's surprising what people like and don't like.
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: You know, like I asked one of my leaders this week.
• 26:10
  Speaker 1: I'm like hey, can you do Bible drills?
• 26:11
  Speaker 1: And they're like I love doing Bible drills.
• 26:13
  Speaker 1: I'm like great, then you go Like I don't mind doing it, I'll do it if I, if no one else will.
• 26:19
  Speaker 1: But they like, loved it and they felt like this was their A game for the week, and that's awesome, you know.
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: And so, lastly, as the head pastor or as the head leader, whatever your title is you should be doing the brunt of the work and the grunt work.
• 26:41
  Speaker 1: Brunt and grunt, okay, because I feel like my philosophy has always been, with my leaders, you guys have free access.
• 26:54
  Speaker 1: What do you want to do?
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: Whatever's left over that nobody wanted or nobody was interested in, I'm happy to do that.
• 27:02
  Speaker 1: Meaning, if they're teaching, they pick the topic they want.
• 27:07
  Speaker 1: I'll take what's left over.
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: If there's roles for the weekend, they can pick what they want.
• 27:10
  Speaker 1: I'll take what's left over.
• 27:10
  Speaker 1: If there's roles for the weekend, they can pick what they want.
• 27:12
  Speaker 1: I'll take what's left over, even when it comes to cleaning, like I was scraping tape off the auditorium floor last week by myself, which is fine Was it your own tape.
• 27:24
  Speaker 1: Well, it was the ministry's tape.
• 27:26
  Speaker 1: We were playing a game and it was like that's fine, they were doing other things.
• 27:32
  Speaker 1: So, being willing to work hard as the ministry lead so that other people can have that margin to sort of explore what they want to do, you know, I just think as the ministry lead you can afford them a really cool opportunity Like, hey, you pick first, you go, first you what looks good to you, I'll take whatever's left.
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: Cause sometimes I think they look to the leader like you tell me, like what I have to do.
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: And then you do and I'm like no, what role do you want?
• 28:02
  Speaker 1: What sounds good to you, what sounds exciting, that you want to try?
• 28:07
  Speaker 1: I'll support you in that and then I'll pick up the rest.
• 28:10
  Speaker 1: You know, and it's probably a lot of stuff they don't even ever see, but it's just like I want you to feel like you're in your sweet spot and I'll do the rest and I don't really care because my goal is not for me anymore.
• 28:28
  Speaker 1: It's not like well, what do I want to do in?
• 28:30
  Speaker 2: ministry.
• 28:31
  Speaker 1: My goal is to look at my team and say my goal is not for Kristen to bring out the best in her, but to bring out the best in you guys, so that we are the best team.
• 28:42
  Speaker 1: And I got a great compliment from one of them the other day and she said, like I always feel so proud to tell people I'm on your team, and I was like wow, that means a lot because, especially for a middle school ministry- what do you mean?
• 28:56
  Speaker 2: It's like the shunned group of the church.
• 29:01
  Speaker 1: Well, I think, because I let them, like my team, my staff.
• 29:07
  Speaker 1: I'm like, yeah, what do you guys want to do?
• 29:09
  Speaker 1: What are you good at?
• 29:10
  Speaker 1: I'm not going to be like, well, I'm in charge, you're going to do exactly what I say, and then maybe I'll let you try other things.
• 29:17
  Speaker 1: It's like, all right, I'm going to sit in the back seat, I'm going to let you guys figure out what you want to do and then I'll jump in when it's needed, because I want them to feel like, okay, we're really doing this.
• 29:31
  Speaker 1: We're not Kirsten's little minions, but it's like we have, say, we can do real ministry.
• 29:39
  Speaker 1: And that's bringing out someone's best of giving away leadership, giving away control, helping them discover their gifts, giving them that continual feedback, helping them to be developed into the best version of themselves.
• 29:55
  Speaker 1: And the truth is, when you do that, your whole entire team wins.
• 30:00
  Speaker 1: I think some students yeah, I mean, I think sometimes leaders are afraid to do that because they don't want to lose their grip and their control over their ministry.
• 30:11
  Speaker 1: But the interesting thing is, the more you give away, the healthier it becomes, because shared leadership is so much more vibrant than one person at the top and everyone in their little cult following what they say to do.
• 30:28
  Speaker 1: It's like.
• 30:28
  Speaker 1: That's not dynamic, that's not vibrant, that's not life-giving, that's not contagious.
• 30:33
  Speaker 1: You know, it's just boring to be the minion.
• 30:37
  Speaker 1: For the pastor it's like, yay, like.
• 30:40
  Speaker 1: But if the pastor is like, oh, you get on my team and I'm going to shine you up and I'm going to like, make you into the best version of yourself and, truthfully, that is the goal.
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: Like anyone who joins your team, it's like, not like.
• 30:57
  Speaker 1: Well, what do you have to offer me?
• 30:59
  Speaker 1: What do you bring to the table for my team?
• 31:02
  Speaker 1: It's more.
• 31:03
  Speaker 2: Ask not what I can do for the youth ministry, ask what the youth ministry can do.
• 31:08
  Speaker 2: Wait, no, something like that.
• 31:09
  Speaker 2: It had potential Too bad sad but chat gbt, rewrite that make it make sense who are you without your chat, gbt?
• 31:19
  Speaker 1: look at this but your goal is you join my team and you will leave here far better than when you came in, not just well, you're allowed to help me make my ministry better.
• 31:33
  Speaker 1: It's like no, I'm going to show you like your unlocked potential and it's just again.
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: The whole thing trickles down and you create leaders who are happy to be there, leaders who feel like a sense of ownership and excitement, and their creativity is unleashed because they know it can be, and they come up with ideas and they execute ideas and you are there to be, cheering them on, supporting them and constantly opening doors for them.
• 32:09
  Speaker 1: That is, to me, the sweet spot of leadership and the sweet spot of ministry.
• 32:15
  Speaker 2: honestly, yeah, if you guys want to check out another episode we did to kind of further the conversation, we did one all about how to create a dream team of volunteers, so make sure you check that out.
• 32:24
  Speaker 2: All right, the question of the day this week is what is something you were like 100% certain of, only to find out later that you were wrong?
• 32:36
  Speaker 1: I don't know if we've already answered this, but I thought narwhals weren't real.
• 32:40
  Speaker 2: We talked about the narwhal tooth.
• 32:43
  Speaker 1: That was in the house recently, oh, in the tooth house, the tooth house.
• 32:47
  Speaker 2: It was the dentist.
• 32:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I thought they were mythological creatures like unicorns of the sea.
• 32:54
  Speaker 1: I had no idea that was real.
• 32:56
  Speaker 1: I thought it was just.
• 32:57
  Speaker 1: You know, like a does seem like, but they're real.
• 33:01
  Speaker 2: And I.
• 33:02
  Speaker 1: I think I even told, like our children like that, no, no, those aren't real.
• 33:08
  Speaker 2: It's just like the unicorn of the sea, yeah.
• 33:11
  Speaker 1: But lo and behold, they are real and they are fascinating they are fast, but I was convinced, like of course they don't exist.
• 33:20
  Speaker 1: I think a lot of people think that I've heard other people say that before, like I thought unicorn or I thought narwhals were totally made up yeah, every time I hear you or myself say narwhal, I feel like we're saying it wrong, but I think that is how you say it.
• 33:36
  Speaker 1: Well, I used to think it was called a narwhal.
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: It wouldn't make more sense.
• 33:41
  Speaker 2: A uniwhale.
• 33:42
  Speaker 2: I one time bet on this and lost.
• 33:46
  Speaker 2: But someone said that the movie Goonies from way back when had an octopus in it and like, and it was taken out of the movie like a deleted scene and I'm like what?
• 34:01
  Speaker 2: There's no way there was an octopus in Goonies.
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 34:05
  Speaker 2: And lo and behold, and there's a deleted scene and it's really, and when you watch it, look at, it's probably on YouTube, I'm sure.
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: Is it gross?
• 34:14
  Speaker 2: It's just so unrealistic and it was like a really weird thing to add in it.
• 34:19
  Speaker 2: Like sometimes you see stuff that made the cutting room floor in movies.
• 34:22
  Speaker 2: You're like, yeah, that absolutely should have been on the cutting room floor and the special effects were really cheesy and just weird.
• 34:31
  Speaker 2: Well, yeah, that movie came out in the 90s no, 80s, 80s are you sure?
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: okay, well, no offense, because I know god's creatures are all his creatures, but octopuses are gross octopi, octopi well this was like a fake, not cgi.
• 34:50
  Speaker 2: It was like a.
• 34:50
  Speaker 2: What do you call it?
• 34:52
  Speaker 2: Muppet, yeah, or something that they made it a marionette.
• 34:56
  Speaker 2: I couldn't, okay.
• 34:57
  Speaker 2: There's one part.
• 34:57
  Speaker 2: I couldn't tell if this was sped up to make look ridiculous, but it was like it was flapping its tentacles really fast all right, we're just gonna have to youtube it.
• 35:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's pretty.
• 35:08
  Speaker 2: It's pretty good to watch, but you could see why it was not in there put in the comments.
• 35:11
  Speaker 1: Pretty good to watch.
• 35:12
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it is pretty funny to watch.
• 35:13
  Speaker 2: It's pretty good to watch, but you could see why it was not in there, put in the comments.
• 35:15
  Speaker 2: Pretty good to watch.
• 35:15
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it is pretty funny to watch.
• 35:16
  Speaker 1: It's pretty good to watch, it's pretty great to watch put in the comments section below.
• 35:20
  Speaker 2: Is there anything you were ever 100% certain of, only to find out later that you were wrong?
• 35:24
  Speaker 2: All right, let's do a community comment of the day.
• 35:26
  Speaker 2: This comes from our good friend sammy verbis, oh, who says great video.
• 35:31
  Speaker 2: Thanks for reinforcing what my passion is Dang.
• 35:35
  Speaker 1: Sammy's a good guy.
• 35:36
  Speaker 2: Sammy is a good guy.
• 35:37
  Speaker 1: Hello Sammy, hello Sammy, hello.
• 35:41
  Speaker 2: Sammy.
• 35:41
  Speaker 2: Thank you guys for watching and listening and we'll see you next time.
• 35:44
  Speaker 1: If someone would have told me do these five things and you'll never.
• 35:48
  Speaker 2: Take two.
• 35:49
  Speaker 2: So this, maybe that is time to panic you're looking at me all weird.