Latest / Vox Novus with Victor Fuhrman / Dr. Eileen Forrestal – The Courage to Shine

Transcript

Dr. Eileen Forrestal – The Courage to Shine · Vox Novus with Victor Fuhrman

0:06
Speaker 1: Vox Novus, The New Voice, Vox Novus, the New Dimension.
0:15
Speaker 1: Vox Novus thought and movement leaders who will share from
0:19
Speaker 1: their experience and offer tools to help us navigate our
0:23
Speaker 1: rapidly changing world. My name is Victor Furman. Welcome to
0:29
Speaker 1: Vox Novus, the New Voice. What power and transformation may
0:40
Speaker 1: be found through self expression and the profound impact of
0:44
Speaker 1: finding one's voice. My guest this week on vox Novus,
0:49
Speaker 1: doctor Eileen Forrestahl overcame early struggles with a speech impediment
0:54
Speaker 1: to become an inspirational thought leader and beacon of empowerment.
0:59
Speaker 1: As a former anesthesiologist, she transitioned from her career of
1:04
Speaker 1: putting people to sleep to one of waking people up
1:07
Speaker 1: through her words and actions. Her website is Eileenforestall dot com,
1:13
Speaker 1: and she joins me this week to share her remarkable
1:16
Speaker 1: story and book, The Courage to Shine. Find your Voice
1:21
Speaker 1: and discover the healing power of your words. Please join
1:26
Speaker 1: me in welcoming to vox Novus, doctor Eileen Forestall. Welcome, Eileen.
1:32
Speaker 2: Well, hello, Vic, Sure, so.
1:34
Speaker 1: Nice to have you here with us today.
1:36
Speaker 2: Well, it's so great to be here today, Eileen.
1:38
Speaker 1: Please share with us your early life and the events
1:42
Speaker 1: that shaped your path.
1:45
Speaker 2: Gosh, my early life seems like such a long time ago.
1:48
Speaker 2: Now I'm sixty five, So my early life started sixty
1:52
Speaker 2: five years ago. And the most pivotal aspect of my
1:54
Speaker 2: early life was what I have recorded in the book
1:57
Speaker 2: was an accidental overdose of aspirin when I was three,
2:01
Speaker 2: and this was I would imagine, quite a traumatic event.
2:06
Speaker 2: I had to have a stomach wash out for these
2:08
Speaker 2: forty forty tablets, and I kind of subsequently I developed
2:14
Speaker 2: a speech impediment, you know, between sort of coughing and
2:17
Speaker 2: wretching and choking and all that kind of stuff that
2:19
Speaker 2: you know it's got to gagging. It obviously interfered with
2:22
Speaker 2: my speech, to my speech development, and I just found
2:26
Speaker 2: it very hard and I just had I just had
2:28
Speaker 2: a stammer. So I just couldn't get the words out.
2:30
Speaker 2: I would get very anxious, I would get very excited,
2:32
Speaker 2: and I just couldn't get the words to come out
2:34
Speaker 2: in any kind of sort of intelligible order. So kind
2:37
Speaker 2: of most of my young life was really kind of
2:39
Speaker 2: plagued by this, just trying to kind of, you know,
2:40
Speaker 2: speak like everybody else spoke, you know, I could hear
2:42
Speaker 2: other people they could speak differently. And then I was
2:45
Speaker 2: kind of struck with this. So it kind of I
2:48
Speaker 2: struggled kind of through with it with you know, with
2:50
Speaker 2: like when I was in kind of national school, but
2:52
Speaker 2: I kind of got very quiet, and I got very
2:53
Speaker 2: sort of you know, I just got kind of upset,
2:56
Speaker 2: you know that the children, maybe other children on the road,
2:58
Speaker 2: you know, where we lived, they might kind of you know,
3:00
Speaker 2: stammering along with me, you know, but it looked like
3:02
Speaker 2: they could stop, and then I couldn't stop. So it
3:05
Speaker 2: kind of it might have been a game for them,
3:06
Speaker 2: but it was really not a game for me. And
3:08
Speaker 2: then when I was in my kind of teenage years
3:10
Speaker 2: in school, it just became really really difficult. It just
3:13
Speaker 2: became very challenging. I was just embarrassed and I was
3:16
Speaker 2: just ashamed, and I just thought, why can't I speak
3:18
Speaker 2: like anybody else? This is like so not fair. And
3:21
Speaker 2: then I decided at thirteen, I said, you know what,
3:22
Speaker 2: I'm just not going to bother. I'm just not going
3:24
Speaker 2: to bother to try anymore. So I'm just kind of
3:26
Speaker 2: giving up trying to kind of speak. So if anybody
3:30
Speaker 2: asked me a question, my first answer was just refuse,
3:32
Speaker 2: I'm not going to answer you. I'm not going to
3:34
Speaker 2: talk to you. And I suppose that's really how I
3:37
Speaker 2: sort of managed to just kind of just refusing to,
3:40
Speaker 2: you know, speak whenever I was asked sell us.
3:43
Speaker 1: About your relationship with your mother place.
3:46
Speaker 2: Well, I suppose on the same level, I kind of
3:50
Speaker 2: underneath all of that, I kind of not that I
3:54
Speaker 2: blamed her. She actually blamed herself. She could see how
3:56
Speaker 2: difficult it was for me. She was always forever, you know,
3:59
Speaker 2: ian really slow down, you know, calm down and speak properly,
4:02
Speaker 2: and I'm just kind of think I can't speak properly
4:04
Speaker 2: and I can't slow down. And it was she almost
4:08
Speaker 2: kind of assumed the sort of a guilt, you know.
4:09
Speaker 2: It became the family kind of story that, oh, I
4:11
Speaker 2: you know, Island swallowed the tablets and that's why Aileen
4:14
Speaker 2: has the stammer. So ma'am kind of had this guilt.
4:16
Speaker 2: And then because she had the guilt, I kind of
4:18
Speaker 2: blamed her and I said, well, it's your fault. You know,
4:20
Speaker 2: it's your fault that I have this, because she said
4:22
Speaker 2: it was her fault. So I just kind of assumed, well,
4:25
Speaker 2: it was her fault, and that was kind of the
4:27
Speaker 2: way it was. So we had a kind of a
4:28
Speaker 2: contentious relationship. So the more kind of frustrated and unhappy
4:31
Speaker 2: I got, the more I kind of blamed her, like
4:33
Speaker 2: she was the reason for my frustration and my own happiness,
4:35
Speaker 2: and when things weren't working out in life, and she'd be,
4:38
Speaker 2: you know, trying to like she you know, she was
4:40
Speaker 2: really really great, and she really patient, but I was
4:42
Speaker 2: just kind of resentful, and I was thinking, off, only
4:44
Speaker 2: had you hadn't left out the tablets, and if only,
4:46
Speaker 2: if only you hadn't let them take up my tonsils,
4:48
Speaker 2: and if only you hadn't done of this, then you know,
4:51
Speaker 2: my life would be different. So anyway, that was kind
4:53
Speaker 2: of how it was. So I suppose we had that
4:55
Speaker 2: kind of mother daughter kind of reactions. So whenever she'd say,
5:00
Speaker 2: you know where you're heard this way, I would say, no,
5:02
Speaker 2: I'm going to wear it this way. And if she'd say, right,
5:03
Speaker 2: wear this nice dress, I said, no, I'm going to
5:05
Speaker 2: wear these nice trousers. And that was kind of the
5:07
Speaker 2: way it was.
5:08
Speaker 1: How did your stammer affect your choices?
5:13
Speaker 2: Well, that was the kind of looking back on it,
5:16
Speaker 2: you know, it's easy to see things in retrospect. And
5:18
Speaker 2: what I will say was, you know, when you start
5:19
Speaker 2: to write a book and you start to kind of
5:21
Speaker 2: try and look at your life and look at various
5:23
Speaker 2: you know, turning points and choices that you had, then
5:26
Speaker 2: it starts to come into perspective a little bit. So
5:28
Speaker 2: you know, in writing the book, I kind of really
5:30
Speaker 2: had to look and see where did it impact my choices,
5:32
Speaker 2: And at the time that never really occurred. Like the choices,
5:35
Speaker 2: it was like I had no choice. As far as
5:37
Speaker 2: I was concerned, I had no choice. So when it
5:39
Speaker 2: came to leaving school, I I couldn't use a telephone.
5:42
Speaker 2: You know, I wasn't going to be able to you know,
5:44
Speaker 2: work in an office, do with people, do with telephones.
5:47
Speaker 2: So I just, you know, I my brother was a
5:50
Speaker 2: year ahead of me, and I was just wondering what
5:53
Speaker 2: am I going to do, and you know, thinking to myself,
5:55
Speaker 2: and then he was there kind of you know, going
5:57
Speaker 2: on about being in college and how great it was,
5:59
Speaker 2: and you just that in lecture theater and you just
6:01
Speaker 2: took notes and there was just an exam at the
6:03
Speaker 2: end of the year, and you know, you didn't have
6:05
Speaker 2: to kind of talk to anybody, and I thought, oh
6:06
Speaker 2: my god, that like sounds amazing, Like what's the longest
6:09
Speaker 2: course in college, I'll do that one. And I thought, well,
6:12
Speaker 2: if I could just like calm down for like seven
6:15
Speaker 2: years in medical school that was the longest course, then
6:19
Speaker 2: surely at the end of that i'd be I'd be sorted.
6:23
Speaker 2: I'd have getten rid of this damn stammer because you
6:26
Speaker 2: know it, really it was that pressure of that cool
6:28
Speaker 2: thing about school and being you know, the phone ringing
6:30
Speaker 2: and you having to pick it up or somebody asking
6:32
Speaker 2: you to do something and you having to kind of
6:33
Speaker 2: answer on the spot. That used to provoke intense anxiety.
6:37
Speaker 2: So anyway, that was so that's how I chose medicine
6:40
Speaker 2: and the longest course in college. And then there I was.
6:42
Speaker 2: Seven years later, I qualified, and then I had to look.
6:44
Speaker 2: I had a great career. But during my career as well,
6:47
Speaker 2: I was always a little bit very evasive, and I
6:51
Speaker 2: didn't choose a straight path through kind of a you know,
6:53
Speaker 2: a career profession. Through medicine, I very much avoided, you know,
6:57
Speaker 2: having to do any presentations or having to do any
6:59
Speaker 2: kind of research. You'd have to present or get involved
7:01
Speaker 2: in any kind of organizational where you'd have to have
7:03
Speaker 2: an opinion. So really, you know, because I was in anesthesia,
7:06
Speaker 2: I was very much behind the scenes. My patients were asleep,
7:09
Speaker 2: everything was really quiet. I didn't really have to talk,
7:12
Speaker 2: you know, I could talk like one on one to somebody,
7:15
Speaker 2: but I didn't have to do anything any louder than that.
7:17
Speaker 2: So that kind of that was how I ended up
7:19
Speaker 2: being an an eisthethist. And somebody said it wasn't it
7:22
Speaker 2: wasn't that ironic that, you know, my early life at
7:25
Speaker 2: three was you know, because I had a stammer, because
7:28
Speaker 2: you know, something that went down my throat. And here
7:29
Speaker 2: I am, like, I spent a career as an eisthelist,
7:32
Speaker 2: and a lot of my job is, you know, putting
7:34
Speaker 2: tubes into people's throats and attaching them to breathing machines.
7:37
Speaker 1: And a lot of the work with the patients does
7:39
Speaker 1: not require you to speak with.
7:40
Speaker 2: Them, no, none of it.
7:45
Speaker 1: What inspired you to share your story in the Courage
7:49
Speaker 1: to Shine, Oh well, you know.
7:52
Speaker 2: When you again, you're sort of kind of realizing kind
7:56
Speaker 2: of the different things that happened in life. And because
7:58
Speaker 2: you start I started maybe meeting with people and you'd
8:00
Speaker 2: be talking about this kind of thing. You're having this
8:02
Speaker 2: kind of inquiry into your life and how you get here,
8:04
Speaker 2: you know, how you got here, why you do what
8:05
Speaker 2: you do and all that. And I was saying to
8:08
Speaker 2: somebody and then she said, oh, she said, you know,
8:10
Speaker 2: you know, you should write a book, and I don't.
8:12
Speaker 2: I had never any intention of writing a book, but
8:15
Speaker 2: she kind of said, well, maybe you know, it might
8:17
Speaker 2: help somebody else, or it might you know, it might
8:19
Speaker 2: inspire somebody else. So I kind of thought, well, you know,
8:21
Speaker 2: maybe it would, because you know I did obviously here
8:23
Speaker 2: I am like on a podcast, and I will happily
8:26
Speaker 2: go on any you know, give me a microphone and
8:29
Speaker 2: let me speak, and I'll happily speak now and my
8:31
Speaker 2: whole life is completely like the last we say, twenty
8:33
Speaker 2: years is a lot different from the thirty forty years
8:37
Speaker 2: that came before. And so yeah, that's kind of somebody
8:40
Speaker 2: just said, you know, maybe it would it would help.
8:42
Speaker 2: And because I was kind of teasing it out for
8:43
Speaker 2: myself as well as to how it how it transpired
8:47
Speaker 2: for me, I thought I could take somebody else through
8:48
Speaker 2: a journey and then they could maybe follow, you know,
8:51
Speaker 2: see how it transpired for me, and then see maybe
8:53
Speaker 2: where something similar maybe could trans transpire for them if
8:57
Speaker 2: they were to read it and let them go on
8:58
Speaker 2: their own journey. Like it's my but it's kind of
9:01
Speaker 2: sort of not quite a universal story, but I think
9:02
Speaker 2: it's fairly applicable to a lot of people.
9:05
Speaker 1: Did you personally find it a healing experience to write
9:08
Speaker 1: the book?
9:09
Speaker 3: Oh?
9:09
Speaker 2: Completely completely, And it was It wasn't. It was like
9:13
Speaker 2: the writing of the book myself was very kind of interesting,
9:16
Speaker 2: you know when I had to go and do that
9:17
Speaker 2: exploration for myself. But a lot of it was in
9:21
Speaker 2: the in the maybe the editing or the really really
9:26
Speaker 2: turning the book around so that the book would provide
9:28
Speaker 2: value for other people. Like it wasn't just me kind
9:32
Speaker 2: of you know, being being therapeutic for me, Like that's
9:34
Speaker 2: all very well and good, but like I'm kind of
9:35
Speaker 2: healer at heart, you know, my whole world has been
9:37
Speaker 2: around here in medicine and kind of helping and supporting
9:39
Speaker 2: and just kind of really you know, all of that,
9:41
Speaker 2: and I just it was like, yeah, it became it
9:45
Speaker 2: just became, you know something that it wasn't just about
9:49
Speaker 2: healing myself or being something for me. It was actually
9:51
Speaker 2: how could it also be of benefit to somebody else?
9:54
Speaker 2: So I had to put two hats on, you know, like,
9:58
Speaker 2: so what was it about this that would really you know,
10:00
Speaker 2: empower and inspire or motivate something other people? And that
10:03
Speaker 2: was probably more of the kind of the you know,
10:05
Speaker 2: the real kind of transformation for me. That wasn't just
10:09
Speaker 2: about me.
10:11
Speaker 1: The subtitle of The Courage to Shine is find your
10:16
Speaker 1: Voice and Discover the Healing power of your Words. But
10:20
Speaker 1: that wasn't the original subtitle. What was it and why
10:23
Speaker 1: did you change it?
10:25
Speaker 2: Oh gosh? The original subtitle was something I like along
10:29
Speaker 2: the lines. I had several agrigin subtitles but maybe the
10:31
Speaker 2: one you're referring to is Living Life from Yes Yes,
10:35
Speaker 2: And it's like that's pretty much the sort of working
10:38
Speaker 2: title of my next book because it just really I
10:43
Speaker 2: just kind of found that, you know, so much of
10:44
Speaker 2: my life was dominated by the word no. Really it
10:47
Speaker 2: was no, I can't do it, no, No, I don't
10:50
Speaker 2: want to, No, I can't no, don't ask me no.
10:53
Speaker 2: So it really kind of narrowed down my life quite
10:55
Speaker 2: you know, quite a lot. And then when you know,
10:59
Speaker 2: when I kind of finally somebody said, you know, would
11:01
Speaker 2: I do something, and I sort of said, well, yes,
11:05
Speaker 2: and it was like, gosh, you know, if I actually
11:06
Speaker 2: said yes and then did that, So if I did, well,
11:09
Speaker 2: you know, somebody had asked me I was doing. I
11:12
Speaker 2: was doing a climb, like a fundraising climb, and my
11:16
Speaker 2: my cousin had organized her. She was a teacher and
11:19
Speaker 2: she'd organized her class teenagers to do a sponsored silence,
11:22
Speaker 2: you know, which was you know, quite quite appropriate, and
11:26
Speaker 2: in their sponsored silence, they would raise some money for me.
11:28
Speaker 2: And then she said, but when you promised that when
11:30
Speaker 2: you come back, you'll deliver a talk to the students
11:34
Speaker 2: who raised the money, And I was like a sinking feeling,
11:38
Speaker 2: and it was like so far away. I thought, well,
11:39
Speaker 2: actually I'll say yes. I'll say yes now and then
11:42
Speaker 2: you know, I mean, maybe something will happen and I
11:44
Speaker 2: can change my mind or something. So I already had
11:47
Speaker 2: kind of my escape root in order. But I said
11:48
Speaker 2: I'd say, I said yes. But when I went and
11:51
Speaker 2: when I did the you know, I did the climb,
11:52
Speaker 2: I did kill him and Jarrow and there was a
11:54
Speaker 2: seventeen year old on the trip. He was really really
11:57
Speaker 2: great and we just kind of you know, got to
11:59
Speaker 2: not a raised the funds, but actually to deliver them
12:02
Speaker 2: into you know, a school and kind of go around
12:04
Speaker 2: and look at the health centers and just look at
12:05
Speaker 2: all the way people were struggling. Kind of really in Nairobi,
12:08
Speaker 2: like a world away from you know, from where I
12:10
Speaker 2: was living. So when I came back, I said, you
12:13
Speaker 2: know what, I am going to do that talk. I
12:15
Speaker 2: am going to do that talk. I'm going to I'm
12:17
Speaker 2: just going to do it. So I went back and
12:20
Speaker 2: I did it, and I you know, it was my
12:23
Speaker 2: first time back in the school for like, you know,
12:24
Speaker 2: thirty years, and it was class of sixteen to seventeen
12:27
Speaker 2: year olds and they actually listened and they really enjoyed it,
12:31
Speaker 2: and they just thought it was amazing. And then they
12:33
Speaker 2: kind of thought, well, you know, maybe they could do it.
12:35
Speaker 2: Because you know, I wasn't particularly fit and I wasn't
12:37
Speaker 2: particularly anything. I just said, well, yes, I'll do it.
12:40
Speaker 2: So it was just the kind of the start of gosh,
12:42
Speaker 2: you know, life starts to look a bit, you know,
12:44
Speaker 2: bigger when you say yes. That's the subtitle of my
12:47
Speaker 2: next book.
12:48
Speaker 1: Yes is a wonderful word, especially when making positive choices
12:52
Speaker 1: and offering forgiveness and compassion is it ever appropriate in
12:57
Speaker 1: your lingo to say no.
13:00
Speaker 2: Well, you know, no is a very important word. However,
13:04
Speaker 2: I feel that when we're using and certainly now, if
13:07
Speaker 2: I'm saying no to something, I'm clear what it is
13:10
Speaker 2: that I'm saying yes to, because this it's like the
13:13
Speaker 2: other side of the coin, you know, it's like I'm
13:15
Speaker 2: going to say either, we'll say, you know, on some level,
13:18
Speaker 2: it could be like yes to myself. So I'm going
13:20
Speaker 2: to say no to what you're asking me to do.
13:22
Speaker 2: It's applied to Kline. It's a it's a you know,
13:25
Speaker 2: no that doesn't work for me because I'm doing such
13:27
Speaker 2: and such another thing, or because I'm engaged in that No,
13:29
Speaker 2: I can't do this, So it doesn't become like a
13:32
Speaker 2: flat no, which is you know, before I was I
13:36
Speaker 2: was just kind of a flat no. The only answer
13:38
Speaker 2: I would give to anybody was no, because I was
13:41
Speaker 2: so afraid of what would happen if I said anything
13:43
Speaker 2: other than no. So now I'm not afraid of what's
13:46
Speaker 2: going to happen if I say no. I'm kind of
13:48
Speaker 2: clear what's going to happen if I say no. I'm
13:49
Speaker 2: also clear what, you know, I'm not clear what's going
13:51
Speaker 2: to happen if I say yes. So I'm willing to
13:54
Speaker 2: kind of see what will happen if I say yes.
13:55
Speaker 2: But when I'm clear that it's that it's a no
13:58
Speaker 2: for me, then it's a no for me. And you know,
13:59
Speaker 2: we're pretty entitled to have our boundaries and say yes
14:03
Speaker 2: and no to what we want to say yes and
14:06
Speaker 2: no too. But I like to think that there's a
14:07
Speaker 2: like I said something positive on the other side of
14:09
Speaker 2: the note that we are saying yes to.
14:11
Speaker 1: I actually had a challenge with saying no. I grew
14:17
Speaker 1: up in a situation where my father took ill when
14:19
Speaker 1: I was very young, and I became part of his
14:21
Speaker 1: healing team with my mother, and for the first time
14:25
Speaker 1: in taking care of him, I felt that he loved me.
14:27
Speaker 1: I didn't feel loved by him prior to that, and
14:30
Speaker 1: that turned me into what some people call a people pleaser.
14:34
Speaker 1: And becoming a people pleaser and saying yes to everyone
14:37
Speaker 1: ultimately resulted in my own health issues being neglected, and
14:41
Speaker 1: this led to an awakening in my fifties and the
14:45
Speaker 1: understanding of the creation of healthy boundaries. I learned that
14:49
Speaker 1: it was okay to say no when my energy was
14:52
Speaker 1: being usurped and to only say yes when appropriate. It
14:56
Speaker 1: actually inspired a little poem I share that with you.
14:58
Speaker 2: Sure Yes.
15:00
Speaker 1: It's called the healing power of No. A time comes
15:03
Speaker 1: for choosing rather than losing the essence that makes us
15:08
Speaker 1: so and in the bestowing. There's power in knowing the
15:13
Speaker 1: freedom that comes with no. When said with compassion, not
15:17
Speaker 1: angry in fashion and letting the self love flow, there's
15:21
Speaker 1: a sense of renewing and deep soul imbuing the awareness
15:26
Speaker 1: that comes with no. So with gentle voice and the
15:31
Speaker 1: power of choice and the courage to make it so,
15:35
Speaker 1: I'm still here, my friends. There's no means in this end,
15:39
Speaker 1: just the healing that comes with no. I lost, Thank you,
15:45
Speaker 1: Thank you, And of course for me, when my spiritual
15:48
Speaker 1: path reopened in my late thirties and early forties, finding
15:53
Speaker 1: the ability to say yes became very important because I
15:57
Speaker 1: found that synchronicities would take place, and if something was
16:00
Speaker 1: presented to me and I could, I had three choices.
16:04
Speaker 1: I could either dismiss it out of hand, I could
16:07
Speaker 1: say yes, but not right now, perhaps later. Or I
16:10
Speaker 1: could say yes with a capital why. And every time
16:14
Speaker 1: I said the yes with the capital why, another one
16:17
Speaker 1: would take place. And another one and another one, and
16:20
Speaker 1: it really built my spiritual path and the better part
16:23
Speaker 1: of my life from the night from my forties on.
16:26
Speaker 1: And so consequently I found the balance between the yes
16:29
Speaker 1: and the.
16:30
Speaker 2: Noddle exactly perfect perfect, yeah, and I kind of have
16:36
Speaker 2: another you know again, you talk about kind of spirituality,
16:39
Speaker 2: I kind of find it kind of in nature. You know,
16:41
Speaker 2: that's kind of where I kind of get my kind
16:43
Speaker 2: of spiritual presence. And you just have it. There's no
16:46
Speaker 2: no in the universe. You know, the takadel doesn't say
16:49
Speaker 2: I'm not going to grow today, and you know, the
16:52
Speaker 2: spring doesn't say I don't think I'll bother spring in
16:54
Speaker 2: this year. You know, it just kind of unfolds. But
16:57
Speaker 2: it's a very much kind of you know, it's like
17:00
Speaker 2: a it's just a yes, it's just a you know,
17:03
Speaker 2: a continuum. And then you know, we have I keep saying,
17:06
Speaker 2: you know, it's interesting because k and Ow and you
17:08
Speaker 2: know different. But you have this thing that when we
17:11
Speaker 2: you know, when we're getting language early on, and suddenly
17:14
Speaker 2: we were we learned this word no, and suddenly it's
17:19
Speaker 2: like no, no, and it's practicing this no and instead
17:26
Speaker 2: of really kind of understanding maybe the power or the
17:29
Speaker 2: rejection of it. No, because that's when you talked about
17:32
Speaker 2: my mother, you know, when she'd come and you know,
17:34
Speaker 2: try and hug me or you know, kiss me good night,
17:36
Speaker 2: I'd be no, go away. You know, I didn't realize
17:40
Speaker 2: like you know how see your child. You know, but
17:42
Speaker 2: it's like that sense of like no, it's such a
17:45
Speaker 2: negation and it's such a rejection. And you know, somebody
17:48
Speaker 2: could invite you to dinner or invite you to a
17:49
Speaker 2: party and you say no, and they can feel personally rejected.
17:52
Speaker 2: So unless you can kind of be really clear that
17:55
Speaker 2: why it's not it's a no, you know, it's not
17:57
Speaker 2: like you know whatever, whatever it is. But you know,
18:00
Speaker 2: I think really the universe keeps offering as opportunities to
18:03
Speaker 2: say yes, and then we can decline obviously and say
18:05
Speaker 2: well no, thank you.
18:07
Speaker 1: How did your experiences as an anesthesiologist influence your perspective
18:12
Speaker 1: on the healing power of words.
18:17
Speaker 2: Well, I suppose in anesthesia when I when I kind
18:23
Speaker 2: of in my latter years, I took a way more
18:27
Speaker 2: kind of a kind of a leadership role within anesthesia,
18:31
Speaker 2: and I would run the clinic, the pre operative or
18:35
Speaker 2: the pre assessment clinic. So you would then see a
18:38
Speaker 2: lot of people maybe several weeks before their surgery, so
18:41
Speaker 2: they were coming in, you know, like fully dressed, fully
18:45
Speaker 2: kind of you know, aware, people that weren't sort of
18:48
Speaker 2: you know, just ready to go to surgery kind of
18:50
Speaker 2: lying down and a guardy in a paper towel the
18:53
Speaker 2: way you know, or in a paper gown the way
18:55
Speaker 2: you know. Often it would be. So we're seeing them early,
18:58
Speaker 2: and then you could actually ask them what they were
19:00
Speaker 2: concerned about, and they would tell you what they were
19:02
Speaker 2: concerned about, and you know, whether they were you know,
19:05
Speaker 2: it took just different fears that they had. So that
19:07
Speaker 2: was an opportunity for me to really kind of explain
19:10
Speaker 2: really to listen to what their fears were and then
19:11
Speaker 2: explain as best I could, you know, to allay those fears,
19:15
Speaker 2: and that I felt had healing power. You know that
19:17
Speaker 2: that was kind of prior to their there it began
19:20
Speaker 2: their healing journey a little bit earlier than just having
19:23
Speaker 2: their surgery and then having to start healing and then
19:25
Speaker 2: trying to listen to people telling them what to do.
19:27
Speaker 2: That you could begin that healing journey earlier with some
19:30
Speaker 2: preparation and really having listened to people and seeing what
19:33
Speaker 2: actually their concerns were and then being able to allay
19:35
Speaker 2: those concerns and answer their questions. So I thought that
19:39
Speaker 2: on a professional level, was was just really helpful.
19:44
Speaker 1: And after thirty two years in medicine, you chose to
19:47
Speaker 1: retire from that. What inspired that retirement?
19:50
Speaker 2: Oh gosh, that's kind of a challenge. Well, I was.
19:54
Speaker 2: I was invited to attend an entrepreneur retreat and my
20:01
Speaker 2: first question was, well, actually, no, thank you, because I'm
20:05
Speaker 2: not an entrepreneur. I'm actually, you know, a medical doctor,
20:09
Speaker 2: and I'm not an entrepreneur. I don't know even you know,
20:11
Speaker 2: spelling the word was even a challenge for me at
20:13
Speaker 2: that time. And the person then said, oh, you know,
20:17
Speaker 2: but I just saw that you had a small business,
20:19
Speaker 2: you know, and you had a Facebook page and I
20:22
Speaker 2: was producing these inspirational diaries, and she said, I thought
20:25
Speaker 2: maybe you'd like your you know, your business to be global.
20:28
Speaker 2: And I kind of thought, and really what my diaries
20:30
Speaker 2: were was all about words. It was just all about
20:32
Speaker 2: you know, quotes and little stories and messages. And I
20:35
Speaker 2: thought all these words and I said, oh my goodness,
20:37
Speaker 2: this is like my world. I love words. So when
20:40
Speaker 2: she thought about them going global. I got very excited.
20:42
Speaker 2: So I said, all right, vent sure, maybe I'll kind
20:43
Speaker 2: of be a baby entrepreneur and I'll go to on
20:45
Speaker 2: the retreat. So I did it for a month and
20:48
Speaker 2: I just kind of saw like a lot of kind
20:50
Speaker 2: of opportunity. Th Oh, my goodness, this is like really
20:52
Speaker 2: really I just love this. But anyway, I went back
20:55
Speaker 2: and I was I was just going back and I'm
20:58
Speaker 2: kind of back in my regular life and I'm kind
21:00
Speaker 2: of left with these kind of like I've got a
21:02
Speaker 2: foot down two boats, and I'm thinking, you know what
21:03
Speaker 2: I do? And I said, no, I've got a regular life.
21:05
Speaker 2: I've got responsibilities, I've got you know, I've got a
21:07
Speaker 2: I've got a job, and this is, you know, my career,
21:09
Speaker 2: and this is what I'm doing. And then when I
21:11
Speaker 2: was going to the first my first list, my operating
21:16
Speaker 2: at the first of the operating theater, which happened to
21:17
Speaker 2: be the Obstetric theater, and they're riding on the board.
21:20
Speaker 2: So it's been it's been refurbished while I've been away.
21:22
Speaker 2: That's why I could get time off. So's we've had
21:24
Speaker 2: new theaters, we've got new operation the operating tables and
21:27
Speaker 2: new lights, and you know, everything is new and it's
21:29
Speaker 2: shiny and it's lovely, and they're just the new operating tables.
21:32
Speaker 2: Then they're just riding up and they're saying that actually
21:34
Speaker 2: they can now take patients weighing up to four hundred
21:37
Speaker 2: and fifty kilos.
21:38
Speaker 1: Oh my goodness.
21:39
Speaker 2: And I just look at the numbers because I've been
21:41
Speaker 2: like swamped in numbers for the previous week because this
21:44
Speaker 2: is all about numbers. And I just looked at and
21:47
Speaker 2: I thought, you know, I said, well, this was the operation.
21:49
Speaker 2: These were the new tables, so this was the new
21:50
Speaker 2: standard and it was going to kind of, you know,
21:52
Speaker 2: be there for the next thirty odd years. Oh my god,
21:55
Speaker 2: that's crazy. Like I'm sixty, I'm sixty kilos. I think, no, no, no,
21:59
Speaker 2: this is this. This can't be right, you know. And
22:02
Speaker 2: then I looked in the next theater was like three
22:04
Speaker 2: hundred and eighty five kilos, and the next one with
22:06
Speaker 2: three hundred and fifty, and I thought, oh my goodness.
22:08
Speaker 2: So we're looking at the obstetric theater where we're going
22:11
Speaker 2: to be delivered babies like by cincerians. Section. This is
22:13
Speaker 2: the one that has the big has the biggest number,
22:15
Speaker 2: and I thought, oh my god, this is like, really,
22:17
Speaker 2: I don't know, I think there's got to be another way.
22:19
Speaker 2: I said, really, I think there's got to be another way.
22:20
Speaker 2: So I think I'm going to exit out of the
22:23
Speaker 2: medical career and all these drugs that I had to
22:25
Speaker 2: keep people nice and asleep, and do you know what,
22:28
Speaker 2: maybe I'll just go and use words and see if
22:29
Speaker 2: I can wake people up with the words. So I
22:31
Speaker 2: went into the business of the diaries and we just
22:34
Speaker 2: started to produce more and more of those. So we
22:36
Speaker 2: ran with those for another fifteen fifteen years. Said they're
22:38
Speaker 2: still going, They're still going, and so yeah, we've kind
22:41
Speaker 2: of reached you know, maybe five hundred thousand people with
22:43
Speaker 2: the diaries. And I'm really really proud of those, and
22:46
Speaker 2: I think they're amazing.
22:47
Speaker 1: My guest is doctor Eileen Forrestall her book The Courage
22:51
Speaker 1: to Shine. Find your Voice and Discover the healing power
22:55
Speaker 1: of your words. Eileen, please share with our listeners where
22:58
Speaker 1: they can get your book, The Diaries and find out
23:01
Speaker 1: more about you.
23:02
Speaker 2: Okay, Well, the book is on Amazon and it's The
23:06
Speaker 2: Courage to Shine, and it's available on Amazon US and
23:10
Speaker 2: Amazon UK and my website is Isleenforestal dot com. And
23:16
Speaker 2: there's an excerpt, a little excerpt for you on that one.
23:19
Speaker 2: You can download the excerpt and see if you like it.
23:21
Speaker 2: So the diaries are available at www dot get up
23:25
Speaker 2: and godiary dot com.
23:27
Speaker 1: And we'll be back with more of Aileen Forestall after
23:29
Speaker 1: these words on the own Times Radio Network.
23:33
Speaker 4: The Cutting Edge of Conscious Radio Home Times Radio IOMFM.
23:38
Speaker 4: Ome Times Magazine is one of the leading online content
23:42
Speaker 4: providers of positivity, wellness, and personal empowerment. A philanthropic organization,
23:47
Speaker 4: their net proceeds are finaled to support worldwide charity initiatives
23:51
Speaker 4: via Humanity Healing International. Through their commitment to creating community
23:55
Speaker 4: and providing conscious content, they aspire to uplift humanity on
23:59
Speaker 4: a globe scale. Home Times co creating a more conscious lifestyle.
24:05
Speaker 1: Back on Vox Novus, my guest this week is doctor
24:08
Speaker 1: Eileen Borstahl. Her book is entitled The Courage to Shine.
24:13
Speaker 1: Find your Voice and Discover the healing power of your Words. Eileen,
24:18
Speaker 1: can you elaborate on the significance of finding one's voice
24:23
Speaker 1: in the journey of both self discovery and empowerment?
24:30
Speaker 2: Well, you know, our voice really is how we kind
24:35
Speaker 2: of presence ourselves in the world. You know, I have
24:41
Speaker 2: a friend who's deaf and who doesn't speak, and I've
24:45
Speaker 2: been in that community and it's just amazing how silent
24:49
Speaker 2: it is and how they communicate. However, for most of us,
24:55
Speaker 2: we actually have a voice, and then how do we
24:58
Speaker 2: communicate that? So it's it's like looking, you know, when
25:04
Speaker 2: me when I had to look at myself like you know,
25:06
Speaker 2: the words when I was younger, and it was it
25:09
Speaker 2: was really easy. For It wasn't easy, but it was
25:12
Speaker 2: easier for me sometimes to tell a lie than to
25:15
Speaker 2: tell the truth. And it wasn't that I was telling
25:18
Speaker 2: the lie. It was easier for me to say the words.
25:21
Speaker 2: So if somebody asked me, you know, what did I want?
25:24
Speaker 2: I would could say Maybe I could say an apple,
25:27
Speaker 2: because I couldn't say a packet of crisps, you know. So,
25:31
Speaker 2: and you know, if they if they asked a question
25:33
Speaker 2: in school, you know, what was the capital of I
25:35
Speaker 2: don't know whatever? And maybe I couldn't say I couldn't
25:40
Speaker 2: see the beginning of the words, So I would choose
25:43
Speaker 2: another word that I could say, so it would be
25:45
Speaker 2: something bizarre. It'd say it was Amsterdam instead of you know, Brussels.
25:49
Speaker 2: It's like I would know the answer, but because I
25:52
Speaker 2: thought I couldn't say it, I would I would say
25:54
Speaker 2: a lie, right, So then people either looked at me
25:57
Speaker 2: as if I didn't know what I was talking about
25:59
Speaker 2: or was maybe a stupid person because you know, I
26:02
Speaker 2: wasn't I wasn't saying the obvious, and I didn't kind
26:05
Speaker 2: of mind that. It was like I don't really care,
26:07
Speaker 2: you know, how I show up as long as for me,
26:10
Speaker 2: i'm not you know, I can say the words. So
26:13
Speaker 2: that for me was like when I had looked at
26:15
Speaker 2: that and I thought, oh my goodness, Iley, Like what
26:18
Speaker 2: how did people listen to me? You know when I
26:20
Speaker 2: said I couldn't do something, or you know, I had
26:22
Speaker 2: to make some excuse to be somewhere else than rather
26:24
Speaker 2: than be where I you know, maybe said I would be.
26:26
Speaker 2: And I just lived a life like that. It was
26:29
Speaker 2: very very kind of it just it just wasn't a
26:33
Speaker 2: powerful life. I was hiding all the time. So when
26:36
Speaker 2: I kind of started to kind of say, well, actually,
26:38
Speaker 2: you know, why don't I just like tell the truth,
26:40
Speaker 2: like now just tell the truth, now, be straight, say
26:44
Speaker 2: it as it is. It just it gives me way
26:47
Speaker 2: more like power myself. It's just it's straight. I'm just
26:49
Speaker 2: answering your question and just saying it the way I
26:52
Speaker 2: see it, without having all this subterfuge after try and
26:56
Speaker 2: you know, make up some reason or some story or
26:58
Speaker 2: high behind some blah blah blah thh because I just
26:59
Speaker 2: don't tell you the truth. So I think that's maybe
27:02
Speaker 2: how I how I how I can explain that.
27:06
Speaker 1: The Courage to Shine explores themes of resilience and transformation.
27:12
Speaker 1: How do you hope readers will connect with these themes
27:15
Speaker 1: in their own lives?
27:19
Speaker 2: Well, you know, I think we just have to, any
27:20
Speaker 2: of us, have to look at our lives when we
27:22
Speaker 2: are right now and realize, you know, how much resilience
27:24
Speaker 2: we've already shown in order to get here, and whether
27:28
Speaker 2: you know, whether we've you know, overcome challenges or we've
27:31
Speaker 2: managed to stick it out, or we've managed to kind
27:34
Speaker 2: of you know, just keep showing up, and you know,
27:37
Speaker 2: we have demonstrated resilience. And I think it's to acknowledge
27:41
Speaker 2: that and not to kind of make any of the
27:43
Speaker 2: things that you've any things you did in your life,
27:45
Speaker 2: that you make them you kind of you know, regret
27:47
Speaker 2: them or whatever you turn them in a way to
27:50
Speaker 2: kind of say, well, actually that kind of helps to
27:51
Speaker 2: get me here, you know, and I here is pretty
27:54
Speaker 2: good because now I have choices when I'm here, or
27:57
Speaker 2: maybe I didn't have a choice back then. So I
27:59
Speaker 2: think there's is that sense of, you know, just that
28:03
Speaker 2: kind of inner kind of you know, resilience that you've
28:05
Speaker 2: always had. We just don't you know, acknowledge us. Maybe
28:08
Speaker 2: we kind of think, oh, we've you know, we've been
28:10
Speaker 2: overcome by something or we've been you know, disempowered by something,
28:13
Speaker 2: but there's something else has kept us going, and something
28:16
Speaker 2: else has kept us here, and it's just really you know,
28:19
Speaker 2: So I think about the book, It's like when you
28:21
Speaker 2: try and join the dots backwards, you can see how
28:23
Speaker 2: far you've come, and maybe that might just help other
28:26
Speaker 2: people just to realize how resilient they already have been
28:28
Speaker 2: in their own life. And if you've been resilient in
28:30
Speaker 2: one area, you can be resilient in any area.
28:33
Speaker 1: Many of our listeners have either semi retired or retired
28:38
Speaker 1: and they are looking for their third act, something to
28:41
Speaker 1: come back into. What would you suggest to them.
28:44
Speaker 2: Oh, gosh, my favorite hobby horse. Now, well, yes, it's
28:50
Speaker 2: like I suppose really it is about the you know,
28:53
Speaker 2: the next book that I'm writing, which is about Embrace
28:54
Speaker 2: the Age. So it's to see what age, you know,
28:57
Speaker 2: what edge we're in. So we're kind of, you know,
28:58
Speaker 2: we were at an edge of maybe you know, the
29:00
Speaker 2: ending of maybe one phase of life and looking at
29:02
Speaker 2: the beginning of another. And then really what I look
29:04
Speaker 2: and see is, well, you know, how do you envisage, Like,
29:06
Speaker 2: how would you like to envisage the future? Some if
29:08
Speaker 2: a great believer in like you know, vision boards and
29:11
Speaker 2: being able to articulate, maybe you know, what could it
29:13
Speaker 2: look like in five years? Like really, if I had
29:15
Speaker 2: a magic want, what would I like to be doing
29:17
Speaker 2: in five years? And then you can look at other
29:19
Speaker 2: people and think, God, what are they doing and say
29:20
Speaker 2: I wouldn't mind doing what they're doing. You know, they
29:23
Speaker 2: look like they're having a good time. I wonder if
29:25
Speaker 2: I could do that. So, you know, even for me,
29:28
Speaker 2: and I'm stepping into something I never kind of really
29:32
Speaker 2: expected that I would be doing, which would be just
29:35
Speaker 2: starting to lead kind of leadership training for young women
29:40
Speaker 2: in universities. So it's kind of bringing me back to
29:43
Speaker 2: my university days and all the times that I didn't
29:45
Speaker 2: present in those days. But now I'm coming from another
29:47
Speaker 2: perspective and I'm really seeing what about, you know, the
29:50
Speaker 2: wisdom that I have, all the kind of the you know,
29:52
Speaker 2: the the kind of you know, the learning that I've
29:54
Speaker 2: already have. How can I now, you know, maybe impart
29:58
Speaker 2: that to younger people, you know, who are living obviously
30:01
Speaker 2: in a modern world. But you know, we still have
30:04
Speaker 2: something to contribute. And I call it wisdom. So I
30:08
Speaker 2: really say we need we need wisdom in times of transformation.
30:11
Speaker 2: We don't really need information in times of transformation. We
30:15
Speaker 2: have as much information as we could possibly. I mean,
30:19
Speaker 2: how much more information do we need? But really we
30:22
Speaker 2: need wisdom as into how to harness that, how to
30:24
Speaker 2: focus it, how to use it, how to you know,
30:28
Speaker 2: just kind of be kind of powerful with the information
30:30
Speaker 2: that we have. We don't need more of it. And
30:33
Speaker 2: you know, we used to put it in the in
30:35
Speaker 2: the in the diary for young people. It's like getting
30:37
Speaker 2: your information of the internet was like trying to drink
30:40
Speaker 2: water from a fire hydrant. So I think the wisdom
30:44
Speaker 2: of a certain age, you can distill a lot of
30:47
Speaker 2: what's necessary into something quite you know, short and sweet
30:52
Speaker 2: and profound that will actually communicate as opposed to having
30:55
Speaker 2: reams and realms and reams of information and AI is
31:00
Speaker 2: only just kind of I mean, it's going to explode that.
31:04
Speaker 2: But so that's I do feel that people, you know,
31:06
Speaker 2: coming into this what I would call reflective stage of
31:10
Speaker 2: life is also a stage where you can really really
31:12
Speaker 2: contribute to younger people. And it's really having the confidence
31:14
Speaker 2: to do that and then just looking and seeing where
31:17
Speaker 2: is there a need and where do I see that
31:20
Speaker 2: I could make a difference, and then maybe I'd be
31:21
Speaker 2: willing to, you know, learn how to do that or
31:24
Speaker 2: train in that and or something that you really really
31:27
Speaker 2: want to do. A friend of mine has just, you know, again,
31:30
Speaker 2: she retired from from anesthesia and oh my goodness, she's
31:35
Speaker 2: showed me pictures of her paintings that she's been she's
31:39
Speaker 2: just started to paint and she's resurrected an entire and
31:42
Speaker 2: it was skill and a passion that she had when
31:45
Speaker 2: she was younger, when she didn't have time to to paint.
31:47
Speaker 2: And now she's talking about, you know, holding art classes
31:50
Speaker 2: and you know, showing other people of our age how
31:53
Speaker 2: to get back into painting and you know, how to
31:55
Speaker 2: use you know, oils and pastels and all the kind
31:57
Speaker 2: of stuff, and it's just really exciting. So she's producing
31:59
Speaker 2: stif and now she wants to help other people and
32:01
Speaker 2: teach other people to do the same. Wonderfully, we all
32:05
Speaker 2: have something to offer.
32:06
Speaker 1: Absolutely, And I returned seventy one in January, and I
32:12
Speaker 1: retired from my forty four year career in industrial technology
32:15
Speaker 1: the welding industry in the end of March. And for me,
32:20
Speaker 1: the word retire is just a stepping stone word. It
32:23
Speaker 1: doesn't mean an end. It means a new beginning. And
32:27
Speaker 1: that retirement has afforded me the opportunity to start working
32:30
Speaker 1: on my own books, which I plan for quite some time,
32:33
Speaker 1: and do many many other things. And I had a
32:35
Speaker 1: wonderful spiritual teacher who said there should have been an
32:38
Speaker 1: eleventh commandment in after the ten commandments, and the eleventh
32:42
Speaker 1: commandment is thou shalt have purpose. And he said, as
32:46
Speaker 1: we wake up every morning with purpose in our hearts,
32:48
Speaker 1: we live a true life. And that's I respect that teaching.
32:53
Speaker 2: Yeah, oh, absolutely, you know you really want to, you know,
32:57
Speaker 2: design something for yourself that really makes it worth waken
33:00
Speaker 2: up in the morning. Absolutely, No, Yeah, And there's so
33:04
Speaker 2: many things. I know, I'm very attached to the UN
33:07
Speaker 2: Global Goals. You know, there's seventeen of them in there,
33:10
Speaker 2: and we can find I always go for like good
33:12
Speaker 2: you know, quality education and health and well being. So
33:14
Speaker 2: anything I do is to really support quality education and
33:18
Speaker 2: good health and well being. So it gives me a
33:21
Speaker 2: really really big umbrella of purpose. So that'll you know,
33:24
Speaker 2: lots of things will fit under that umbrella. And there's
33:26
Speaker 2: you know, I'm very keen on supporting anything to do
33:29
Speaker 2: with the environment and anything to do with just really yeah,
33:34
Speaker 2: just really what's sustainable on the earth. And really, you know,
33:36
Speaker 2: I'd certainly like to have there big peace in the
33:39
Speaker 2: world and we could just be more peaceful and speak
33:43
Speaker 2: a little bit more, you know, just be a bit
33:47
Speaker 2: more peaceful really.
33:48
Speaker 1: And compassionate and compassionate.
33:50
Speaker 2: I think that's the big word, the compassionate.
33:53
Speaker 1: In our brief conversation before we started the Center View
33:56
Speaker 1: and in reading your book, I've determined and I've learned
33:59
Speaker 1: about much of you and that you're truly a very
34:01
Speaker 1: authentic person. In your opinion, what role does authenticity play
34:06
Speaker 1: in fostering meaningful connections and personal growth?
34:12
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, I think when I look at myself, I wasn't.
34:15
Speaker 2: I wasn't particularly you know, true to myself. For most
34:19
Speaker 2: of my life, I was hiding and I was presenting
34:22
Speaker 2: a kind of a pretty much a false face, you know.
34:26
Speaker 2: So even though I smiled and even though everything looked
34:29
Speaker 2: fine for myself, I was like, oh my, it's like, crikey,
34:33
Speaker 2: how do I get out of this trap? How do
34:35
Speaker 2: I get out of this? You know? It's like got
34:37
Speaker 2: myself caught up in this And it's like I'm pretending
34:40
Speaker 2: that I don't want to do any of these things,
34:42
Speaker 2: and I'm pretending that I, you know, that everything is fine,
34:45
Speaker 2: and I'm pretending that I'm fully kind of engaged in
34:47
Speaker 2: the world. But my voice was missing. I was not
34:51
Speaker 2: showing up anywhere with a voice. I was sitting there
34:53
Speaker 2: absolutely quietly, probably seething, with something to say inside, and
34:58
Speaker 2: I'd leave ammusingly. I think, quite I say this, Why
35:00
Speaker 2: did nobody say that? How come that was?
35:03
Speaker 3: You know?
35:04
Speaker 2: And really, you know, so that wasn't so my kind
35:07
Speaker 2: of being kind of authentic. Now it's like I have
35:10
Speaker 2: a voice, and now whatever I say is just the
35:14
Speaker 2: way it is. It just the way it is. And
35:16
Speaker 2: if I can't do something, I'll tell you I can't
35:18
Speaker 2: do something. And if I don't know how to do something,
35:19
Speaker 2: I'll tell you I don't know how to do something.
35:21
Speaker 2: And if I tell you i'll try, I'll try. So
35:23
Speaker 2: it's just like it's just a very easy way for me,
35:26
Speaker 2: I think, just to be really kind of open and
35:29
Speaker 2: just just kind of say this is it, this is
35:31
Speaker 2: this is me, this is what you get, this is
35:34
Speaker 2: what you get, and what you got for a long
35:35
Speaker 2: time wasn't really wasn't really me. It was probably the
35:38
Speaker 2: reason that my marriage didn't didn't survive because I was
35:41
Speaker 2: hoping that you know, my ex husband would say all
35:44
Speaker 2: the things that I wanted to say, and he would
35:46
Speaker 2: think the way I was thinking, and he would say
35:47
Speaker 2: what I wanted him to say because I wasn't saying it,
35:50
Speaker 2: and I thought, well that was completely like that was
35:52
Speaker 2: so not fair. So anyway, now I say it myself, absolutely.
35:58
Speaker 1: Was there a pivotal in your journey that catalyzed your
36:03
Speaker 1: transition from silence to empowerment?
36:09
Speaker 2: Well, look, they say, you know your life can change
36:11
Speaker 2: in a single conversation, and I have it that my
36:13
Speaker 2: life changed in a single conversation. And somebody asked me
36:16
Speaker 2: a question, and it was really about that. I was
36:18
Speaker 2: saying something that I can't do this. I can't do that.
36:21
Speaker 2: I can't do it. I just can't do it. And
36:24
Speaker 2: I was giving all of the reasons why I couldn't
36:26
Speaker 2: do it, because you know, I have a stammer and
36:28
Speaker 2: I get anxiety and I can't do it. And his
36:32
Speaker 2: challenge was, you won't do it. I said, of course,
36:38
Speaker 2: what you mean I won't. I would if I could, right,
36:41
Speaker 2: And it just it was kind of an interaction and
36:44
Speaker 2: I was so so believing that I couldn't do it.
36:50
Speaker 2: I was so conditioned, like I had thirty years of
36:52
Speaker 2: proof that I couldn't do it, and he was challenging
36:55
Speaker 2: me to say, well, maybe that's not true, maybe you're
36:58
Speaker 2: just not willing to try. I was like, I was
37:01
Speaker 2: kind of shocked. You know, of course I'm willing. I
37:05
Speaker 2: just can't do it, right, And then he said, well,
37:08
Speaker 2: if you're willing, so when are you going to do it?
37:12
Speaker 2: I thought, what do you you know? I mean, really
37:14
Speaker 2: he was asking me to actually speak. He was actually
37:16
Speaker 2: asking me to speak in front of a group of people.
37:19
Speaker 2: And I kind of said, well, well, all right, then
37:22
Speaker 2: I'll I'll give it a go, see what happens. And
37:27
Speaker 2: I did, and nothing happened, and all the words that
37:31
Speaker 2: I said actually all came out kind of nice and clear.
37:33
Speaker 2: I didn't really say much. I just said hello, but
37:37
Speaker 2: I could hear the hello in the room and it
37:39
Speaker 2: was perfectly normal. And then I just sort of and
37:42
Speaker 2: then I just said, I said, well, you know, all
37:43
Speaker 2: I can say really is thank you, because I couldn't
37:46
Speaker 2: even there was nothing else for me to say except,
37:48
Speaker 2: you know, thank you for like sort of that kind
37:51
Speaker 2: of insisting but really inviting me up and then really
37:54
Speaker 2: giving me the courage to get here, because I really
37:56
Speaker 2: had I didn't have the courage to do it. And
37:58
Speaker 2: that it was that fear that stopped me all the
37:59
Speaker 2: time time, Fear stop me putting my hand up, fear
38:02
Speaker 2: stop me volunteer from anything, Fear that I would be
38:04
Speaker 2: found out, somebody would find out that I couldn't do it.
38:07
Speaker 2: And then when I just did it myself and I
38:08
Speaker 2: found out, oh my goodness, I can Oh my god,
38:10
Speaker 2: this is shocking, and it was like, oh my goodness,
38:14
Speaker 2: now I have to keep going. So I just took
38:16
Speaker 2: on more and more accepting invitations, and I got more
38:19
Speaker 2: and more fluent, and I got more and more confident,
38:21
Speaker 2: and here I am, you know, happily as a chatting
38:24
Speaker 2: away on your podcast.
38:26
Speaker 1: What advice would you offer to people in relationship about
38:30
Speaker 1: honest and open communication.
38:34
Speaker 2: For me, it's it's it's it's suppose it's the basis
38:39
Speaker 2: of a really good and healthy relationship is that if
38:43
Speaker 2: you can't be honest and open with the people closest
38:46
Speaker 2: to you in your life. Now it depends obviously in
38:47
Speaker 2: the relationship to have with people, but kind of in
38:49
Speaker 2: your closer or kind of your intimate relationships, you know
38:52
Speaker 2: that you're sharing with them, really you know who you
38:54
Speaker 2: are and what you're up to, and and just what's
38:57
Speaker 2: kind of the truth about you and your fears and
38:58
Speaker 2: your dreams and all the kind of stuff. It's best
39:00
Speaker 2: to be honest and open about all of that. And
39:03
Speaker 2: you know, if you struggle with something, then to be
39:05
Speaker 2: honest and open about what you struggle with, then maybe
39:07
Speaker 2: they can help you. So I think, you know, the
39:09
Speaker 2: quality of our relationships is really really pivotal to the
39:12
Speaker 2: quality of our lives, and then we're just being open
39:15
Speaker 2: and transparent in those relationships. Number One, the relationship with yourself,
39:18
Speaker 2: that you're honest with yourself. I think that's where the
39:20
Speaker 2: authenticity comes in. First, that you're you're honest with yourself,
39:23
Speaker 2: and then when you're honest with yourself, then you trust
39:25
Speaker 2: the you know, you trust the other people in your
39:27
Speaker 2: life that you can be honest with them. So there
39:29
Speaker 2: is that thing about having to you know, trust yourself,
39:31
Speaker 2: trust them, be open and just just kind of that's
39:35
Speaker 2: that's that's how I feel. You know, obviously you need
39:38
Speaker 2: trust in relationships, and then you want to know that
39:41
Speaker 2: you are that you're you're also going to be trustworthy
39:43
Speaker 2: and you're going to be honest and open and you're
39:45
Speaker 2: not going to be you know, duplicitous, and then that's
39:48
Speaker 2: just I think that just makes for you know, healthy
39:50
Speaker 2: meaningful relationships.
39:52
Speaker 1: And listening, truly listening without opining or interruption to what
39:57
Speaker 1: the other person is saying is so critical.
40:00
Speaker 2: It's incredibly important. And somehow I'm not sure we get
40:06
Speaker 2: a lot of I just don't want to say training,
40:10
Speaker 2: but we don't have a lot of experience about for listening.
40:13
Speaker 2: You know, as we're growing up as children, we're encouraged
40:15
Speaker 2: to speak. All my mother would say, will we speak properly,
40:17
Speaker 2: speak properly, speak properly. So when I wasn't speaking, but
40:20
Speaker 2: I was listening, and because there was no compulsion for
40:24
Speaker 2: me to speak, I didn't have to prepare anything, so
40:27
Speaker 2: I could just sit there and listen. And it was
40:29
Speaker 2: amazing when you hear when you're listening, and then you
40:34
Speaker 2: can also hear that other people aren't necessarily listening to
40:37
Speaker 2: other people, And in my head, I'd be saying to people,
40:41
Speaker 2: but that's just what that person said, do you not listen?
40:45
Speaker 2: And you just notice that some people were so keen
40:50
Speaker 2: to say what we want to say, and we're so
40:52
Speaker 2: keen to be heard that we forget that. Actually, the
40:56
Speaker 2: listening is most important. If we don't have an audience,
40:59
Speaker 2: like I could chat on here in your podcast. If
41:01
Speaker 2: there's nobody listening, there's not really much point in me
41:03
Speaker 2: saying anything. So listening is really really important. And if
41:07
Speaker 2: we all want to be heard and we want people
41:10
Speaker 2: to listen to us, we have to listen to other
41:13
Speaker 2: people so that they can be heard. It's not just
41:16
Speaker 2: exclusively over here with me. There's a person over there
41:19
Speaker 2: that's trying to express something. It's trying to say something,
41:22
Speaker 2: and really I need to listen to hear what it
41:25
Speaker 2: is they're trying to tell me, as opposed to jumping
41:29
Speaker 2: in and saying, I know what you're going to say,
41:31
Speaker 2: and this is what you you know, blah blah blah,
41:33
Speaker 2: because we're so key to jump in like we already
41:35
Speaker 2: know what they're going to say, and really we don't
41:37
Speaker 2: know what anybody's going to say, not really, So yes,
41:42
Speaker 2: I think a little bit more emphasis on listening in
41:46
Speaker 2: the modern world would help a lot.
41:50
Speaker 1: My guest is doctor Eileen Forrestall her book The Courage
41:54
Speaker 1: to Shine, Find Your Voice and Discover the Healing Power
41:58
Speaker 1: of Your Words. Will be back more after these words
42:01
Speaker 1: on the Old Times Radio Network.
42:04
Speaker 5: Humanity Healing International is a small nonprofit with a big dream.
42:09
Speaker 5: Since two thousand and seven, HHI has been working tirelessly
42:13
Speaker 5: to bring help to communities with little or no oh.
42:16
Speaker 5: Our projects are not broad mandates, nor are they overnight solutions,
42:21
Speaker 5: but they bring the reassurance then no one is alone
42:24
Speaker 5: and that someone cares. To learn more, please visit Humanity
42:29
Speaker 5: Healing dot org. Humanity Healing is where your heart is.
42:34
Speaker 6: So I'm a cat and I just moved in with
42:36
Speaker 6: this new human and she's got this little toy she's
42:38
Speaker 6: always playing with all day long. Tap tap tap tap,
42:42
Speaker 6: blue bloop. She can't put it down there it is,
42:45
Speaker 6: Oh and get this. She even talks to it. Last
42:48
Speaker 6: week she asked it for Chinese and guess what Eggrel
42:51
Speaker 6: showed up Like magic. Humans have cool toys.
42:55
Speaker 2: A person is the best thing to happen to a
42:56
Speaker 2: shelter pet, be that person adopt.
42:59
Speaker 4: Brought to you by the ad Council and the Shelter
43:01
Speaker 4: Patproject dot org.
43:04
Speaker 7: Hi, this is Bill Mark. I can find humor in
43:06
Speaker 7: almost anything, but one thing I never laugh about its
43:08
Speaker 7: cruelty to animals. If you don't get the joke either, right,
43:12
Speaker 7: People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals five on one
43:15
Speaker 7: Front Street in Norfolk, Virginia, two three five one oh back.
43:19
Speaker 1: On box Novus. My guest this week is doctor Eileen Forrestall.
43:23
Speaker 1: Her book is entitled The Courage to Shine. Find your
43:26
Speaker 1: Voice and Discover the healing power of your Words. Eileen
43:31
Speaker 1: tell us about the Get Up and Go Diaries. What
43:33
Speaker 1: do you offer.
43:34
Speaker 6: There, hush?
43:36
Speaker 2: We offer inspiration and motivation to brighten your day and
43:41
Speaker 2: you know, get your on your way and get you
43:43
Speaker 2: up and going. And they're just as I say, they're
43:48
Speaker 2: kind of just very sort of simple what I call truisms.
43:54
Speaker 2: You know. So when I would be compiling the content,
43:58
Speaker 2: you're always looking number one, I'd be looking to hear
44:01
Speaker 2: what's kind of going on in the world. You know,
44:03
Speaker 2: I have antennae for everything. I'm always listening to what's
44:07
Speaker 2: going on. And then what I try and do is
44:10
Speaker 2: provide something that provide a balance for that. So, you know,
44:13
Speaker 2: sourcing out quotes, you know, from everywhere, you know, Aristotle, Buddha, Jesus.
44:18
Speaker 2: I don't really mind who said it, Oprah Winfrey. It
44:20
Speaker 2: doesn't matter who said something that I think, actually this
44:23
Speaker 2: is a kind of a Trunes's like an universal truth.
44:26
Speaker 2: So I would just try and put some of you know,
44:27
Speaker 2: put all those together with nice pictures, graphics and have
44:30
Speaker 2: this be beautiful. And then when you pick it up
44:32
Speaker 2: and it's just a little message every day and just
44:33
Speaker 2: all these a lot of things. So I just loved it. It
44:35
Speaker 2: was kind of my creative outlet, and I just love
44:38
Speaker 2: putting them two together. And we had when we started
44:42
Speaker 2: off with the Irish with the Irish Get up and
44:44
Speaker 2: Go Diary, and we kind of did it for the
44:46
Speaker 2: diaspora and then we did one for the Get Up
44:49
Speaker 2: and Go Diary for busy women, and then we did
44:51
Speaker 2: one for young people, and then we did we did one.
44:56
Speaker 2: We have a you know, we have a gratitude journal,
44:59
Speaker 2: we have leadership journal, we have a schools homework journal,
45:04
Speaker 2: we had just a hope part of things. I just
45:05
Speaker 2: kept adding more and more travel journals, and I just
45:09
Speaker 2: kind of love putting them together. So that's kind of
45:12
Speaker 2: that's kind of what we what we what we what
45:14
Speaker 2: we're doing. I'm not so much involved in the creative
45:17
Speaker 2: side of it now. I've sort of sort of left
45:20
Speaker 2: kind left a little bit of that. But as I say,
45:22
Speaker 2: they're still going, They're still up and going, and I'm
45:24
Speaker 2: still really really just so proud of, you know, what
45:26
Speaker 2: we've built up and that they keep going. You know,
45:29
Speaker 2: I'd love to see them translated into every language and
45:32
Speaker 2: across cultures. At one point we did actually produce one
45:35
Speaker 2: in India. We did the Indian Get Up and Go Diary,
45:37
Speaker 2: and we did the South African Get Up and Go Diary,
45:39
Speaker 2: and we almost did the American Get Up and Go Diary,
45:41
Speaker 2: and we sort of got We've already got a bit
45:43
Speaker 2: confronted by that as it and anyway. But they're all
45:46
Speaker 2: they're all there, they're all that. That's right, that's what
45:48
Speaker 2: I just love that just they're simple, they're just words,
45:51
Speaker 2: but to me they're truisms. And I think we get
45:53
Speaker 2: a lot of feedback from people who say they often
45:56
Speaker 2: get it as a gift from their friend. It's not
45:57
Speaker 2: something that and we notice people buy for themselves. I
46:00
Speaker 2: mean they're more of them, they're buying for themselves. But
46:02
Speaker 2: in the early days, it was always as a gift
46:05
Speaker 2: for a friend, and then we would get these lovely
46:06
Speaker 2: letters from people to saying I got this from my friend.
46:09
Speaker 2: It came just at the right time, you know, such
46:11
Speaker 2: a such a beautiful book, and you know, thank you
46:13
Speaker 2: so much, and so always really proud of actually what
46:15
Speaker 2: we put out there into the world.
46:18
Speaker 1: What advice would you offer to individuals struggling to overcome
46:22
Speaker 1: obstacles and pursue their passions.
46:26
Speaker 2: Well, first of all, to recognize, really what's the obstacle?
46:30
Speaker 2: You know, I mean I was pretty clear. I thought
46:32
Speaker 2: the obstacle was that I couldn't actually speak clearly or
46:35
Speaker 2: speak properly. I was convinced that was the obstacle, and oh,
46:38
Speaker 2: if I could do that properly, then that would be
46:40
Speaker 2: then I'd be fine, I'd be away. But the obstacle
46:43
Speaker 2: actually wasn't that. The obstacle was actually like the fear
46:47
Speaker 2: of being exposed. It was like if I opened my mouth,
46:51
Speaker 2: somebody would find out something about me that I was
46:53
Speaker 2: trying to hide, which was that I couldn't speak properly.
46:56
Speaker 2: It was totally but that's the way. That's the way
46:59
Speaker 2: my brain was interpreting it, because really, when we look around,
47:02
Speaker 2: there are really no obstacles. There's very few of us
47:04
Speaker 2: that are actually imprisoned in you know whatever. And for
47:07
Speaker 2: those of us that are there, that's unfortunately fortunate because
47:09
Speaker 2: it is an obstacle to freedom. But for most people
47:12
Speaker 2: who you know, their obstacles may not be as real
47:16
Speaker 2: as they think. So I often would suggest that people,
47:20
Speaker 2: if you're going, if you have a dream, that you
47:21
Speaker 2: find somebody who can listen to your dream and then
47:23
Speaker 2: tease out your obstacles and see are you willing to
47:26
Speaker 2: find ways around them or through them, or over them
47:29
Speaker 2: or on this And because there probably won't be set
47:32
Speaker 2: in stone, and it really is to be, as you say,
47:35
Speaker 2: to be pulled by your dreams and not kind of
47:38
Speaker 2: you know, stopped by your fears. So most obstacles I
47:42
Speaker 2: think are somewhere in the realm of a fear or
47:45
Speaker 2: something that you're you know, not not saying or not
47:48
Speaker 2: willing to say, or somewhere or where you've said no you
47:50
Speaker 2: think you can't go back and say yes, or vice versa.
47:52
Speaker 2: You've said nest now you can't go back and say no.
47:54
Speaker 2: There's something that you're thinking, a belief or something that
47:56
Speaker 2: you have about yourself or about another person, or about
47:59
Speaker 2: a situation, and really, I think speaking it out and
48:02
Speaker 2: getting into kind of a conversation with somebody who really
48:05
Speaker 2: is willing to listen to your dreams and your struggles
48:08
Speaker 2: and your concerns, and then really and then see can
48:11
Speaker 2: together can you tease something out? Because in our own
48:13
Speaker 2: heads we're not very effective. We do a lot of that,
48:17
Speaker 2: you know, ruminating and worrying, and it just goes round
48:19
Speaker 2: and round and round, and there's no nothing to dilute it,
48:22
Speaker 2: or there's nothing to kind of question it. So when
48:25
Speaker 2: you're in a dialogue with somebody else, you can even
48:28
Speaker 2: hear yourself questioning it, you know, because somebody is listening now,
48:31
Speaker 2: So now you're listening yourself to what you're saying, and
48:34
Speaker 2: then you're thinking, well, actually, is it really an obstacle?
48:36
Speaker 2: And then look and see what is the obstacle? And
48:38
Speaker 2: then see what what kind of support you need or
48:40
Speaker 2: what would you possibly you know, get to get beyond
48:43
Speaker 2: beyond that thing that you now do you see as
48:45
Speaker 2: the obstacle.
48:47
Speaker 1: How do you incorporate the principles outlined in your memoir
48:51
Speaker 1: into your work as a speaker and a coach.
48:55
Speaker 2: Well, the book is called The Courage to Shine, So,
48:56
Speaker 2: as you say, it's all basically courage. And I suppose
49:01
Speaker 2: when people often say, well, what do you mean by shine?
49:05
Speaker 2: And for me, the shine it's just the ease of
49:08
Speaker 2: actually the ease of just saying it as it is.
49:11
Speaker 2: It's just it's the truth. It's like, you know, I
49:14
Speaker 2: don't know the answer to that question. And it's the
49:16
Speaker 2: courage to say that. So it's the courage to speak
49:18
Speaker 2: up and tell the truth and share it and either
49:21
Speaker 2: to share your dreams, like there's no harm in actually
49:24
Speaker 2: sharing that. You know, some people might get you know,
49:26
Speaker 2: they might laugh at them, or they might reject them
49:29
Speaker 2: or mock them. It's like, you know what, that's okay.
49:31
Speaker 2: They're mine, they're my dreams. So it's just it's that
49:34
Speaker 2: having that courage and like it's your voice, they're your dreams,
49:37
Speaker 2: it's your life. You're entitled to really live it the
49:41
Speaker 2: way you want to live it. And you know, we
49:44
Speaker 2: don't want to, you know, impinge on anybody else's freedoms.
49:47
Speaker 2: We don't want to kind of you know, kind of
49:50
Speaker 2: have you know, ll if I do something that means
49:52
Speaker 2: you can't do something else. It's not like that. It's like, well,
49:55
Speaker 2: what if we could all, like, you know, follow our
49:58
Speaker 2: dreams and if all if we all have the courage
50:00
Speaker 2: to kind of shine really and I got to say,
50:02
Speaker 2: look at as the star we are. You know, if
50:03
Speaker 2: you're on a kind of a spiritual path, you kind
50:05
Speaker 2: of realize we all have these really kind of you know,
50:08
Speaker 2: amazing gifts that we've been blessed with. Like from day one,
50:11
Speaker 2: you know, we all came in. My mother delivered me
50:13
Speaker 2: into the world as a perfect little package. You know,
50:16
Speaker 2: she thought I was just you know, this was it.
50:18
Speaker 2: She was delighted with herself. I was absolutely perfect. Now
50:22
Speaker 2: the fact that I kind of went through life and
50:25
Speaker 2: as we say, it's in the book, but I think
50:27
Speaker 2: that's it. So it's really it's your entitled to you know,
50:29
Speaker 2: shine is the star you are. And we're all a
50:32
Speaker 2: little bits of startust I think, And we're all you know,
50:34
Speaker 2: little bits of everything, and we're you know, unfolding all
50:38
Speaker 2: the time, and we're discovering and we have new opportunities
50:40
Speaker 2: all the time. And you know every day that you
50:42
Speaker 2: wake up, you know there's a new you can actually
50:44
Speaker 2: you meet yourself in the mirror every morning if you
50:46
Speaker 2: really want to, and yeah, smile into the mirror and
50:49
Speaker 2: you know, shine and have a great day.
50:52
Speaker 1: What advice would you offer parents whose children are experiencing
50:56
Speaker 1: speech issues.
51:00
Speaker 2: That's an interesting one. Yeah, it's it's it's it's interesting.
51:04
Speaker 2: You know. My mother listened really really patiently, you know
51:08
Speaker 2: she But okay, here's one thing. I Richard Branson has
51:13
Speaker 2: a stamber okay, And I remember Richard Branson saying one
51:16
Speaker 2: time his mother had said to him, it doesn't matter
51:21
Speaker 2: that you have a stammer. If it's important enough to
51:23
Speaker 2: say it, you have to say it. So she didn't,
51:28
Speaker 2: you know, whereas like what my mother said to me,
51:30
Speaker 2: will speak properly, all right, And as far as my
51:34
Speaker 2: brain was concerned, I couldn't speak properly, which kind of
51:36
Speaker 2: meant I wasn't going to speak at all. Whereas I
51:40
Speaker 2: think Richard Branson's advice was a little bit better that
51:42
Speaker 2: if what you have to say is important, then say it.
51:46
Speaker 2: There's a lot of people. Joe Biden is the President
51:48
Speaker 2: of America. He has a stammer. It's not necessarily going
51:52
Speaker 2: to stop anybody. It stopped me. I let it stop me.
51:56
Speaker 2: My mother didn't let didn't. She didn't, she didn't make
51:59
Speaker 2: she didn't you know, you didn't terrorize me, She didn't
52:01
Speaker 2: frighten me. She just get saying to me when you
52:04
Speaker 2: came down, relax, slow down, and speak properly. But the end.
52:08
Speaker 2: And she would happily listen to me while I you know,
52:10
Speaker 2: because obviously I could. I could, I could chat await
52:13
Speaker 2: to her, you know, be full blast, and she could
52:16
Speaker 2: wait while I get the words out, you know. And
52:19
Speaker 2: so yeah, maybe it's something like something like that, just
52:21
Speaker 2: encourage just listen a little bit longer. And what is
52:25
Speaker 2: it that they're really struggling with because they are struggling
52:27
Speaker 2: to say something? You know, when when they're younger, they're
52:30
Speaker 2: struggling to say something, and they maybe have a little
52:32
Speaker 2: bit of a fear, and I don't know. I mean,
52:35
Speaker 2: I do know that anxiety is kind of prevalent in
52:38
Speaker 2: a lot of young people, which is why I think
52:41
Speaker 2: I was so proud of the young Person's Diary, you know,
52:43
Speaker 2: to really have some way that you can deal with
52:46
Speaker 2: anxiety that doesn't overtake your life and that oh, you know, anxiety,
52:50
Speaker 2: it might get you out of something now, but it
52:53
Speaker 2: might be setting up a pattern for later that's not
52:55
Speaker 2: going to work very well. So really start looking and
52:58
Speaker 2: see what you know, how anxiety can be managed a
53:01
Speaker 2: little bit more constructively. And so yeah, I'm not a parent,
53:04
Speaker 2: so I'm not going to give parental advice, but just
53:07
Speaker 2: from my own experience, I'm not sure what would have
53:11
Speaker 2: made any difference for me.
53:13
Speaker 3: I was very determined, you close the Courage to Shine
53:19
Speaker 3: with eighty nine important things you want to say, would
53:23
Speaker 3: you share one or two of them with us?
53:24
Speaker 1: Please?
53:28
Speaker 2: So I picked eighty nine because my mother died when
53:30
Speaker 2: she was eighty nine and she kept, you know, she
53:32
Speaker 2: kept asking me when we was was going to be
53:33
Speaker 2: eighty nine, and I kept saying, well, you know, soon,
53:38
Speaker 2: and she just wanted to be eighty nine because her
53:40
Speaker 2: mom had died at eighty nine and she just wanted
53:42
Speaker 2: to get to eighty nine. So when it came to it,
53:44
Speaker 2: I thought, yeah, let me just share some of the things.
53:49
Speaker 2: So I suppose my first one. If I go my
53:52
Speaker 2: first one, I'm going to read them out for you here. Actually.
53:56
Speaker 2: Number one, thank you for all of it. Without you,
54:01
Speaker 2: there would be no me. Thank you for being my mother,
54:07
Speaker 2: for choosing a career in nursing, for coming to Dublin,
54:11
Speaker 2: for choosing my father, for carrying me, having me looking
54:16
Speaker 2: after me, always been there. For your unconditional love. And
54:21
Speaker 2: thank you for being the person that had me say
54:24
Speaker 2: yes to life. Number two, I love you. That wasn't
54:30
Speaker 2: always an easy thing for me to say. Number three,
54:35
Speaker 2: it was me who did it. I took the tablets.
54:40
Speaker 2: I thought it was clever of me to find them
54:42
Speaker 2: to share them between Brian and me. I thought it
54:45
Speaker 2: was lucky when Brian didn't want his share and I
54:47
Speaker 2: could have all of them. It was me who caused
54:50
Speaker 2: all the upset when you had to rush me to
54:52
Speaker 2: hospital to have my stomach pumped. It was me who
54:55
Speaker 2: screamed stop, who tried to tell you I was scared
54:58
Speaker 2: and they were hurting me. It was me who didn't
55:00
Speaker 2: understand why you were upset. Now I know it wasn't
55:04
Speaker 2: because I was so bold for taking the tablets, but
55:07
Speaker 2: that you had lost your new baby, my baby brother,
55:11
Speaker 2: and I thought it was my fault. I didn't understand.
55:17
Speaker 2: That's my three.
55:18
Speaker 1: Powerful Thank you for sharing those with us. My guest
55:23
Speaker 1: doctor Eileen forrestal her book The Courage to Shine, Find
55:28
Speaker 1: your voice and discover the healing power of your words. Iileen,
55:32
Speaker 1: one more time, please share with our listeners where they
55:34
Speaker 1: can get your book and find out more about you
55:36
Speaker 1: and all of your work.
55:38
Speaker 2: Hey, my book is available on Amazon. My website where
55:43
Speaker 2: you can find out all about me and my work
55:45
Speaker 2: is Aileenforestal dot com and the website for the diaries
55:52
Speaker 2: is www dot get Up and Go diary dot com.
55:58
Speaker 1: Eileen, thank you so much for joining us, ensuring your wisdom,
56:01
Speaker 1: your courage, and your beautiful message.
56:05
Speaker 2: It was a pleasure. Victor, thank you so much for
56:06
Speaker 2: having me.
56:07
Speaker 1: And thank you for joining us on vox Nobus. I'm
56:10
Speaker 1: Victor the Voice Furman. Have a wonderful week.