Latest / Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families / #1206 - Rethinking School: Why Alternative Education Might Be the Best Choice for Your Child
Transcript
- 0:06Speaker 1: Good grades. I'm going to say optional formal training. Being
- 0:13Speaker 1: certified definitely helps. Today a conversation that has inspired well,
- 0:18Speaker 1: we've been inspired by one of our kids based on
- 0:20Speaker 1: some educational decisions that we've made that honestly have been
- 0:25Speaker 1: really hard but seem to be bearing fruit. I'll do
- 0:30Speaker 1: better tomorrow. Welcome to the Happy Families Podcast for another Friday,
- 0:33Speaker 1: Real Parenting Solutions every day on Australia's most downloaded parenting podcast,
- 0:38Speaker 1: we are Justin and Kylie Coulson. Every Friday, we unpack
- 0:42Speaker 1: the week that was. We look at what's working and
- 0:44Speaker 1: what's not working in our parenting in the hope that
- 0:47Speaker 1: it's going to help you in your parenting to be
- 0:50Speaker 1: more intentional, to get things more right, to help the
- 0:53Speaker 1: family to function better. Today, it's all about education, because Kylie,
- 0:57Speaker 1: you're going to kick it off with a win.
- 1:01Speaker 2: Having been in the homeschooling system now for a couple
- 1:04Speaker 2: of years, I've been intrigued and blown away with the
- 1:08Speaker 2: kinds of conversations that I'm having with parents, more so
- 1:11Speaker 2: who are still in traditional schooling systems and feeling really disillusioned.
- 1:17Speaker 2: One of the biggest challenges that students are having outside
- 1:21Speaker 2: of bullying, and I guess the emotional challenges is the
- 1:24Speaker 2: fact that they feel like school is just this rudimentary
- 1:29Speaker 2: list of things that they have to tick off, but
- 1:31Speaker 2: none of it makes sense to them because they are
- 1:33Speaker 2: looking at it going when am I ever going to
- 1:35Speaker 2: use this in the real world, How is this ever
- 1:39Speaker 2: going to be beneficial to me as a beautician or
- 1:43Speaker 2: as a pilot, or they just can't see the life value.
- 1:48Speaker 1: I had a conversation with a school principal just in
- 1:50Speaker 1: the last few days who literally said, our school system
- 1:55Speaker 1: is completely outdated, completely outdated, and it is not fit
- 2:00Speaker 1: her purpose. His words, not mine, but certainly our experience
- 2:03Speaker 1: with homeschooling it's just been revolutionary. I love that we homeschool.
- 2:08Speaker 1: It's really hard. It changes your life completely, but I'm
- 2:11Speaker 1: so glad that we are doing it. But that's not
- 2:14Speaker 1: really what today's I'll Do Better Tomorrow is about. This
- 2:17Speaker 1: is not an advertisement for homeschool and it's not.
- 2:20Speaker 2: An advertisement for alternative schooling either, but our experience has
- 2:24Speaker 2: been a really positive one. A few months ago, I
- 2:27Speaker 2: was in the car driving behind a bus that was
- 2:29Speaker 2: advertising Industry School. I had no idea what industry school was,
- 2:33Speaker 2: but I thought, you know what, I need to look
- 2:35Speaker 2: this up, because Lily had at that point decided that
- 2:38Speaker 2: she really wanted some kind of formalized schooling, but we
- 2:41Speaker 2: knew that we didn't want to send her back into
- 2:43Speaker 2: traditional school system.
- 2:45Speaker 1: Lily's our fifth daughter. She was in grade nine last year,
- 2:48Speaker 1: going into grade ten this year.
- 2:50Speaker 2: So when I looked up what industry school was, I
- 2:53Speaker 2: kind of had an idea that we were looking at
- 2:55Speaker 2: trade school, and I was very nervous about what that meant.
- 2:58Speaker 2: But as I looked more into it, I was blown
- 3:01Speaker 2: away at the exposure that the kids got to different
- 3:05Speaker 2: kinds of industry based learning that would not fall under
- 3:10Speaker 2: your traditional plumbers, builders, mechanics, maybe it engineering, that kind
- 3:16Speaker 2: of stuff. But what I loved even more was the
- 3:20Speaker 2: acknowledgment that their year twelve certificate was their highest priority.
- 3:25Speaker 2: I think previously to this kind of format, trade school
- 3:29Speaker 2: has always been about you finish your ten at high school,
- 3:32Speaker 2: then you go off to trade school year eleven and
- 3:34Speaker 2: twelve and you get yourself an apprenticeship or traineeship, and
- 3:37Speaker 2: it's really about learning on the job. But any formalized
- 3:41Speaker 2: education is lost, it no longer exists. So what I
- 3:47Speaker 2: loved was the mix of these two ideas of acknowledging
- 3:51Speaker 2: that for some kids, traditional schooling just doesn't work. They
- 3:55Speaker 2: love hands on approach, but it shouldn't come at the
- 3:59Speaker 2: expense of an education that not only is worthy, but
- 4:03Speaker 2: pertinent to their life experience. So we decided to give
- 4:07Speaker 2: it a go. We had a look at all of
- 4:09Speaker 2: the different options. So you could do hairdressing, you could
- 4:12Speaker 2: do beautician work, you could work with horses, which was
- 4:15Speaker 2: a huge plus for our year ten daughter, and there
- 4:18Speaker 2: was just so much opportunity there. So we went along.
- 4:22Speaker 2: We had an interview with the principal and I just, oh,
- 4:27Speaker 2: my goodness, I wish. I wish that every school student
- 4:31Speaker 2: could have access to the format and the ethos that
- 4:36Speaker 2: this school is offering our child. What I love is
- 4:40Speaker 2: we have five weeks of education block each term. We
- 4:43Speaker 2: have five weeks of industry block each term. What does
- 4:48Speaker 2: industry block look like? When we first signed up, I
- 4:51Speaker 2: didn't really understand a lot, and I thought that what
- 4:54Speaker 2: was going to happen was five weeks of every term.
- 4:57Speaker 2: Lily was going to get to spend time with horses.
- 4:59Speaker 2: That's what I thought. She was also going to get
- 5:02Speaker 2: signed up to do a traineeship, and she was going
- 5:03Speaker 2: to start getting paid to do that while she was
- 5:08Speaker 2: at school. That's what I thought was going to happen.
- 5:11Speaker 2: But essentially, what I discovered over the last few weeks
- 5:15Speaker 2: of term is the acknowledgment that while she is part
- 5:19Speaker 2: of Industry Block, these next two years, year ten and
- 5:22Speaker 2: eleven are all about exposure to different kinds of trades
- 5:29Speaker 2: and industry options. Up until now, Lily's had a very
- 5:34Speaker 2: narrow concept of what it is she wants to do,
- 5:37Speaker 2: and she is adamant that she knows what she doesn't
- 5:40Speaker 2: want to do. But what Industry School has done is
- 5:44Speaker 2: exposed her to lots of different options. And the conversations
- 5:49Speaker 2: we are now having are, Hey, Mom, I wonder what
- 5:53Speaker 2: it would look like to work in aviation. Where the
- 5:57Speaker 2: heck did that come from? Another day, I'm thinking about
- 6:01Speaker 2: doing some work experience at the local police station. Do
- 6:03Speaker 2: you think they'll let me. Here's a kid who for
- 6:06Speaker 2: the last few years has been adamant she wants to
- 6:08Speaker 2: be a beautician. She loves all things beauty here and makeup,
- 6:12Speaker 2: and we've been really happy to encourage her to go
- 6:14Speaker 2: down that road. But what I love, love, love, love
- 6:17Speaker 2: love is this acknowledgment that that's great if that's what
- 6:21Speaker 2: you want to do, But let's just have a look
- 6:22Speaker 2: at what ours is out there, because unless you actually
- 6:26Speaker 2: have some hands on practical experience with it, you have
- 6:29Speaker 2: no idea if it's what you want to do or
- 6:31Speaker 2: not want to do. And the conversations we're now having
- 6:34Speaker 2: with this kid is just blowing my mind because she's
- 6:39Speaker 2: actually excited about options instead of boxing herself in and
- 6:44Speaker 2: saying this is it, this is all I want to
- 6:46Speaker 2: do with my life after the break.
- 6:47Speaker 1: I'm going to pick up on that because my I'll
- 6:49Speaker 1: do better tomorrow is very much associated with what you've
- 6:52Speaker 1: been talking about. And I really want to address the
- 6:56Speaker 1: elephant in the room when it comes to the way
- 6:59Speaker 1: we are approach alternative school in it. Okay, so, Kylie,
- 7:10Speaker 1: you've just shared this great story about Lily. She's been
- 7:13Speaker 1: at the industry school. There are campuses in Southeast Queensland
- 7:16Speaker 1: in all the major centers, but trade and technical vocational
- 7:21Speaker 1: schools are all over the country, industry connected schools. If
- 7:26Speaker 1: you've got a child who hates school, alternative approaches, this
- 7:31Speaker 1: is the thing. If you look for an alternative approach
- 7:36Speaker 1: you feel like maybe you're a failure. You feel like
- 7:39Speaker 1: maybe your child's a failure. I had this conversation with
- 7:42Speaker 1: a principal of one of these schools just in the
- 7:44Speaker 1: last few days, and he said he asks the kids
- 7:48Speaker 1: as they sit down in class for the first time
- 7:50Speaker 1: in grades ten, eleven, and twelve, how do you feel
- 7:53Speaker 1: that you're here? And he said, overwhelming them, they just say,
- 7:55Speaker 1: I feel like I'm failing. I feel like I've failed school.
- 7:57Speaker 1: I feel like I'm a failure as a person because
- 7:59Speaker 1: I'm not in the mainstream of schooling. And yet so
- 8:04Speaker 1: much mainstream schooling, as you said, doesn't feel purposeful. It
- 8:06Speaker 1: doesn't feel like it works for our kids. It just
- 8:09Speaker 1: feels like we're following this standardized path. And what's fascinating
- 8:13Speaker 1: is when I talk to parents about this, they say, oh, totally, totally,
- 8:17Speaker 1: totally get that school is all of these things that
- 8:20Speaker 1: are not ideal, But there's an unwillingness to step outside
- 8:24Speaker 1: of the mainstream with your own child. We still go
- 8:26Speaker 1: with the conservative approach. Why because that's what we've always done.
- 8:30Speaker 2: We also need the validation that our kids are on
- 8:33Speaker 2: the right path and aligned with everybody else right, you know,
- 8:38Speaker 2: as a homeschool mum. I have no idea where my
- 8:41Speaker 2: kids actually sit on the continuum of learning. Am I
- 8:45Speaker 2: screwing them up? Like? Have I taught them everything? Or
- 8:48Speaker 2: are they're massive gaps if they were to go back
- 8:50Speaker 2: into the school sets. I don't know.
- 8:52Speaker 1: Here's the thing, though, I love the fact that our
- 8:55Speaker 1: daughter Lily left school at the end of your eight
- 8:58Speaker 1: She left with a term to get and for nearly
- 9:01Speaker 1: a year and a half she was homeschooled. You're eight
- 9:04Speaker 1: year nine. This is not the first couple of years
- 9:07Speaker 1: of school where you can probably just teach the kids
- 9:09Speaker 1: to read and write and do some basic addition and
- 9:11Speaker 1: subtraction and you're there. You're eight year nine maths and
- 9:14Speaker 1: science and all those things. She's gone back to school
- 9:17Speaker 1: in year ten and she's absolutely nailing it. But she's
- 9:21Speaker 1: also really happy to be there. And I think this
- 9:24Speaker 1: is the main point that I want to highlight here.
- 9:26Speaker 1: If you've got a child who really hates school, they
- 9:29Speaker 1: need to know that life is still going to be
- 9:31Speaker 1: much more successful if they just push through to the end.
- 9:35Speaker 1: They just need to be in an environment that is
- 9:37Speaker 1: supportive of them. And you've got things like vocational industry
- 9:41Speaker 1: connected schools. You've got school based apprentices apprenticeships, I should say,
- 9:45Speaker 1: there's distance education, there's online school. There are flexible learning centers.
- 9:49Speaker 1: There's a group called edmund Rice Education in Australia. They
- 9:53Speaker 1: run these flexible learning centers that are specifically designed for
- 9:55Speaker 1: students who have disengaged from mainstream education. There's Steiner and
- 9:59Speaker 1: Montessori and other all termed of philosophies. There's busy school,
- 10:01Speaker 1: there's homeschooling, there's tape community college programs. There are so
- 10:06Speaker 1: many flexible ways for kids to do school if they're
- 10:10Speaker 1: not doing well in the mainstream environment, and it doesn't
- 10:13Speaker 1: mean that they've failed or that you've failed. It's that
- 10:16Speaker 1: we're using, to quote Scott Galloway, medieval institutions to train
- 10:22Speaker 1: our children to live in an era where we have
- 10:24Speaker 1: god like technology and they don't match up. They simply don't.
- 10:29Speaker 2: It is an acknowledgement that each of our children is
- 10:33Speaker 2: individual and we have a different way of doing things
- 10:37Speaker 2: and learning.
- 10:38Speaker 1: This is what the school principle said to me. He said,
- 10:40Speaker 1: every school, every school gives lip service to the fact
- 10:43Speaker 1: that they treat each child as an individual. No, they're
- 10:45Speaker 1: a number and that's what he said. He said, But
- 10:47Speaker 1: they don't. They don't because if that individual child is
- 10:51Speaker 1: not able to conform to the mainstream school expectation, then
- 10:59Speaker 1: they just don't fit. And there's only a limited amount
- 11:04Speaker 1: that most schools will do before they say you just
- 11:06Speaker 1: don't belong here. This is not working out. These alternative
- 11:09Speaker 1: schools are not supposed to be dumping grounds for kids
- 11:12Speaker 1: that don't fit. As parents, if we can adjust our
- 11:17Speaker 1: view of schooling and be a little bit radical, our
- 11:21Speaker 1: children are going to actually enjoy themselves so much more.
- 11:24Speaker 1: Here's the biggest thing for us. We've got this daughter
- 11:26Speaker 1: who is now at the industry school. No, this is
- 11:28Speaker 1: not a paid advertisement. We're not doing anything that they
- 11:30Speaker 1: don't know where doing this podcast because we're talking about
- 11:32Speaker 1: our daughter, not the school. But she's gone back to
- 11:34Speaker 1: school in grade ten. Their ethos is if it won't
- 11:37Speaker 1: fly in the workplace, it doesn't fly at school. So
- 11:40Speaker 1: there's Are they perfect with a no bullying policy or anything? No,
- 11:43Speaker 1: of course, no school is, but my goodness, they are
- 11:45Speaker 1: responsive to issues more than that though. She's getting exposure,
- 11:50Speaker 1: as you've said, massive exposure to so much opportunity in
- 11:53Speaker 1: so many industries her eyes are wide, but also the
- 11:57Speaker 1: schooling expectation is different. She will finish it twelve. She's
- 12:00Speaker 1: not going to do an atar path. Oh but guess
- 12:02Speaker 1: what when you go to these schools, they're so flexible
- 12:05Speaker 1: that you can still study early university programming, which means
- 12:10Speaker 1: that you can get into university without the atar and
- 12:13Speaker 1: without having to go through all the stress and drama
- 12:15Speaker 1: and headache and awfulness of what so much so many
- 12:18Speaker 1: of our experience at school. So you're oly better tomorrow
- 12:22Speaker 1: links in with mine because you're saying we've had this win.
- 12:25Speaker 1: Our daughter's experiencing range and breadth because we've stepped out
- 12:28Speaker 1: of the mainstream school system. We've gone with an industry
- 12:30Speaker 1: focused school and it's had an impact. Mine is. I
- 12:34Speaker 1: had a conversation with a school principle of one of
- 12:36Speaker 1: these schools, and it's been such a refreshing way to
- 12:41Speaker 1: see that people are thinking of disrupting education.
- 12:44Speaker 2: You know what else?
- 12:45Speaker 1: He said, The biggest stumbling block is parents because they
- 12:50Speaker 1: don't want to think what have I done? Why is
- 12:53Speaker 1: my child not doing well? And how does it reflect
- 12:55Speaker 1: on me? He said, if we can get past the
- 12:57Speaker 1: pride and the status that's associated with going to this
- 13:02Speaker 1: school versus that school. We can do so much. You
- 13:05Speaker 1: know what, As he said, fifty percent of the kids
- 13:09Speaker 1: in this year's intake in his school are coming from
- 13:13Speaker 1: independent schools. That is, these are parents who have been
- 13:15Speaker 1: paying for a private school for their kids and it's
- 13:18Speaker 1: not working out, and they've said, we've got to do
- 13:20Speaker 1: something else, and for whatever reason, the state school system
- 13:23Speaker 1: is just another version of private school from their perspective.
- 13:26Speaker 1: So they've gone to an industry focused, a vocational focused school,
- 13:30Speaker 1: and gone, all of a sudden, our kids are so happy.
- 13:33Speaker 1: Last quek comment, I couldn't find the office, and so
- 13:36Speaker 1: I looked across and I saw a boy grade eleven.
- 13:39Speaker 1: I said, hey, can you please help me to find
- 13:41Speaker 1: the office? This kid was one of those independent school
- 13:44Speaker 1: students who'd swapped. He'd gone into this new school in
- 13:47Speaker 1: grade eleven because he hated school. I said to him,
- 13:52Speaker 1: how's it going now? He said, I just love it.
- 13:54Speaker 1: I love the learning, I love being at school. I'm
- 13:56Speaker 1: excited to finish year eleven, year twelve. I've already got
- 13:59Speaker 1: my I on a couple of different apprenticeships that I
- 14:02Speaker 1: can do, and I feel like my future makes sense.
- 14:05Speaker 1: I just was like, Oh my goodness, why why, why, why, why?
- 14:09Speaker 1: Why are we doing this to our kids. Why are
- 14:11Speaker 1: we pushing them so hard into systems that don't work
- 14:14Speaker 1: for them? And you know what, as an electrician, he'll
- 14:17Speaker 1: be fully qualified by the age of twenty one. He's
- 14:20Speaker 1: going to be making more money than university graduates for
- 14:23Speaker 1: at least five, six, seven years, if not more, because
- 14:26Speaker 1: we've got a skills shortage and this kid's going to
- 14:28Speaker 1: fly anyway. My old do better tomorrow is let go
- 14:31Speaker 1: of the pride if your child. If you've got a
- 14:33Speaker 1: high school kid or even a younger kid who's struggling
- 14:35Speaker 1: at school and it just doesn't feel like they belong.
- 14:37Speaker 1: There are so many alternatives, and I know it's meant
- 14:40Speaker 1: to be an older better tomorrow.
- 14:41Speaker 2: It is.
- 14:41Speaker 1: We've done two different alternatives, an industry school for our
- 14:44Speaker 1: daughter and homeschooling, and our children are better and happier
- 14:48Speaker 1: and more confident because of it.
- 14:51Speaker 2: I think about a conversation you and I had a
- 14:52Speaker 2: number of weeks ago on the pod about the acknowledgment
- 14:56Speaker 2: that I would rather my kids hang out with other
- 14:59Speaker 2: ADA adults as they totally life totally and what I
- 15:03Speaker 2: love about This model is my child is surrounded by
- 15:07Speaker 2: other industry based adults who they can learn and glean from,
- 15:12Speaker 2: and the exposure is enormous because they are not just
- 15:16Speaker 2: with a classroom teacher who either they gel with or
- 15:19Speaker 2: not gel with. They are being invited into other spaces
- 15:24Speaker 2: where they get to learn and just understand the world
- 15:29Speaker 2: through different perspectives. It's amazing.
- 15:31Speaker 1: This was not the podcast I thought we were going
- 15:32Speaker 1: to record, but I love with a conversation where the
- 15:35Speaker 1: take home message at school is important. Education matters, but
- 15:38Speaker 1: there are so many different ways that you can do
- 15:40Speaker 1: it and your children will benefit. So long as you
- 15:42Speaker 1: value education, it doesn't have to be the standard way.
- 15:46Speaker 1: I'm going to recommend a book dark Horse. Dark Horse
- 15:49Speaker 1: by Todd Rose. It's just popped into my head and
- 15:51Speaker 1: I think that it really highlights the different ways that
- 15:54Speaker 1: people can find joy, success and meaning in life. Let's
- 15:58Speaker 1: wrap it up. The Happy Family's podcast US is produced
- 16:00Speaker 1: by Justin Ruland from Bridge Media. If you would like
- 16:03Speaker 1: more information and resources about making your family happier, visit
- 16:07Speaker 1: us at Happy families dot com dot au and have
- 16:09Speaker 1: a great weekend.