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The Most Valuable 45 Minutes You_ll Spend Today - Matthew McConaughey Motivation · Motivation study

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: If you're aware that you are playing your best game
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: ever as you're playing it, that's when you fuck it up.
• 0:06
  Speaker 2: It's choking at the finish line. It's realizing those immortal
• 0:10
  Speaker 2: finish lines.
• 0:10
  Speaker 3: That just go. And as long as you trust that
• 0:12
  Speaker 3: it's being recorded, the proof's there.
• 0:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 0:16
  Speaker 3: But if I see it coming... And I see that
• 0:18
  Speaker 3: end zone coming.
• 0:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 0:20
  Speaker 3: What do we do?
• 0:20
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 0:21
  Speaker 3: A little tight. A little self-conscious.
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: Eisenhower had this thing about how plans are worthless, but
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: planning is everything.
• 0:27
  Speaker 3: Amen.
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: You do all the prep. You do all the thinking
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: about it. And then you probably don't use one bit
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: of it.
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: When I'm doing my best work, I show up with
• 0:36
  Speaker 2: copious amounts. And I get there and I'm like, well, duh.
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: Not bringing that script to set anymore. And do I
• 0:44
  Speaker 2: go back and go, oh, you could have done, yeah,
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: but because I wasn't adhering to that or going back,
• 0:49
  Speaker 2: hang on a second, let me look at my notes,
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: I found another magic trick along the way.
• 0:54
  Speaker 3: Because it was in the moment.
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: I wasn't going, hang on a second, let me check
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: my notes to make sure. There's some speeches where I'm like, dude,
• 1:00
  Speaker 2: don't go off script. Yeah, but you're going to be
• 1:04
  Speaker 2: reading instead of going engaging. And I have times where
• 1:08
  Speaker 2: I'm like, I don't care. That's going to be printed.
• 1:11
  Speaker 5: Printed.
• 1:13
  Speaker 3: And when it's printed, I want it to be exactly
• 1:15
  Speaker 3: what it said here.
• 1:16
  Speaker 2: So maybe I won't be the best performing orator, but
• 1:19
  Speaker 2: what we'll live on after will be exactly what I
• 1:23
  Speaker 2: meant to say. Ten. Nine.
• 1:29
  Speaker 3: Eight. Leaving children to follow a dream.
• 1:35
  Speaker 6: Liftoff.
• 1:37
  Speaker 3: I grew up only knowing sort of the courage of
• 1:40
  Speaker 3: the persistence.
• 1:42
  Speaker 2: Be resilient, endure, get up, dust yourself off, go. I
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: honestly think I'd written myself a one-way ticket out of Hollywood.
• 1:49
  Speaker 3: People close to me.
• 1:50
  Speaker 2: Basically almost everybody besides my wife, was like, what is
• 1:55
  Speaker 2: your major malfunction, little brother?
• 1:57
  Speaker 4: By not trying to play the game, there is no
• 1:59
  Speaker 4: risk of failure.
• 2:00
  Speaker 3: I'm rolling the dice. I'm sticking with it.
• 2:01
  Speaker 2: I was feeling like my work was more vital than
• 2:03
  Speaker 2: my life.
• 2:04
  Speaker 3: What's better, eight big risks in life? Sin once, miss
• 2:07
  Speaker 3: the mark once, but get seven. Achieve seven. Seven out
• 2:10
  Speaker 3: of eight.
• 2:10
  Speaker 2: Or take a hundred risk and achieve eight of them.
• 2:14
  Speaker 3: My hunch is that if there's a God.
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: He's saying, go for the hundred and get eight rather
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: than eight and get seven. If you're not taking enough
• 2:22
  Speaker 2: risk to sin or miss the mark, which is what
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: sin means, to fail, what are you doing?
• 2:30
  Speaker 3: Don't go back with even money. Go back with safe bets.
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: If you get up and get the courage to keep
• 2:35
  Speaker 2: on going, Every time you get up and dust yourself off,
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: you make the same mistakes each time around because you
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: never backed up to have what I've now learned and
• 2:43
  Speaker 2: still learning is the courage to go. No, I'm going
• 2:45
  Speaker 2: to let some people pass me in the race right
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: now because I'm going to look at why I keep
• 2:48
  Speaker 2: stepping in that damn same.
• 2:49
  Speaker 3: Pothole and twist my ankle.
• 2:50
  Speaker 2: The same spot. Sacrifice a plastic ring today for a
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: gold crown tomorrow. Sacrifice something today for more freedom tomorrow.
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: Sacrifice something today.
• 2:59
  Speaker 3: For a possible healthier future for your kids.
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: If you don't have the hope or believe in something,
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: you're going to end up, you're definitely going to remain
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: where you are. And if you have hope and faith
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: in something, I'm not saying it's 100% get out of jail.
• 3:11
  Speaker 2: You're going to absolutely get out, but you've got the
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: best chance to. The script flipped on me five years ago.
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: I felt like I was going through the motions more
• 3:18
  Speaker 2: in my life, but I was really getting major life
• 3:21
  Speaker 2: experiences through my work. And I had the same question.
• 3:26
  Speaker 3: I was like, whoa.
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: Let's see where I can challenge myself more in the documentary,
• 3:30
  Speaker 2: the one life I'm living rather than the characters I'm
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: going to play that somebody else wrote, someone else directing,
• 3:35
  Speaker 2: someone else is lensing through their camera and editing. What
• 3:37
  Speaker 2: are we doing on this one take that we've had
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: since the day we were born and we cut the
• 3:43
  Speaker 2: day we died? Why are you throwing a jackknife in this?
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: You're tripping yourself running downhill, man.
• 3:50
  Speaker 3: You did it.
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: I had my wife and myself to remind myself for
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: that 4 a.m. clarity that I had in tears when
• 4:03
  Speaker 2: I was like, no, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm rolling the dice.
• 4:09
  Speaker 3: I'm sticking with it. Um, yeah, man, I did think
• 4:14
  Speaker 3: I wrote myself a ticket out of Hollywood.
• 4:16
  Speaker 2: I did look at other vocations, become a teacher, uh,
• 4:21
  Speaker 2: Wildlife guide. I'm serious with those things. But over time,
• 4:27
  Speaker 2: and it was about 20 months, it was gone long enough.
• 4:29
  Speaker 2: I'd found anonymity enough. It was not in your living room,
• 4:31
  Speaker 2: in a theater, in a rom-com. You didn't seem to
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: be shirtless.
• 4:35
  Speaker 3: Where is he? And then I think I told you
• 4:38
  Speaker 3: the story.
• 4:38
  Speaker 2: Turning down the $ 14. 5 million offer, many people go, oh shit,
• 4:42
  Speaker 2: what's he up to? You don't just step out of
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: Hollywood unless you turn that down because you've got a plan.
• 4:49
  Speaker 2: You've got somewhere you want to go. And I think
• 4:51
  Speaker 2: that made me more attractive as a new novel idea.
• 4:55
  Speaker 2: But that was, yeah, that risk took, I think it's
• 4:58
  Speaker 2: fair to say that took a fair amount of courage
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: from me.
• 5:00
  Speaker 4: What virtue is there in balance if there was no
• 5:03
  Speaker 4: such thing as imbalance to fight against?
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  Speaker 3: I wish more people, I'm going to flip the word,
• 5:08
  Speaker 3: were more involved with themselves.
• 5:10
  Speaker 4: Embrace your Icarus.
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: Instead of self-involved, that has a bad term. I wish
• 5:14
  Speaker 2: people were more involved with themselves. I think that's where
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: we're more deficient. Believe in yourself or invest in yourself.
• 5:21
  Speaker 2: Do more of what you can to be great at
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: a craft or a vocation or to get what you want.
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: I sit here with a life where I have the
• 5:31
  Speaker 2: luxury to project, to ask myself and ask others, no,
• 5:36
  Speaker 2: make a sacrifice today. Sacrifice a plastic ring today for
• 5:40
  Speaker 2: a gold crown tomorrow. Sacrifice something today for more freedom tomorrow.
• 5:45
  Speaker 2: Sacrifice something today for a possible healthier future for your kids.
• 5:49
  Speaker 2: I understand that's a luxurious position. I'm not going to
• 5:52
  Speaker 2: apologize that I'm in it, but I understand to someone
• 5:55
  Speaker 2: in misery, they're going, good for you, man. I'm trying
• 6:00
  Speaker 2: to feed the family tonight. I'm not thinking past that.
• 6:03
  Speaker 2: I can't think past that. What do you ask them
• 6:07
  Speaker 2: to do? My indirect thing I would say and understand is, well,
• 6:12
  Speaker 2: if you don't have the hope or believe in something,
• 6:14
  Speaker 2: you're going to end up, you're definitely going to remain
• 6:16
  Speaker 2: where you are. And if you have hope and faith
• 6:18
  Speaker 2: in something, I'm not saying it's 100% get out of jail.
• 6:21
  Speaker 2: You're going to absolutely get out, but you've got the
• 6:23
  Speaker 2: best chance to.
• 6:25
  Speaker 3: Amen. Kumbaya. I get it. I don't think that's how
• 6:32
  Speaker 3: peace is coming. I think that's a great place to
• 6:37
  Speaker 3: hope for, but to get there or closer to there
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  Speaker 3: is going.
• 6:43
  Speaker 2: To take punk rock or rage. It's going to take
• 6:47
  Speaker 2: getting wild. It's not going to be necessarily logical. It's
• 6:53
  Speaker 2: not going to be tame. It's not going to be whispered,
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  Speaker 2: I don't think.
• 6:58
  Speaker 3: No emotion gets more shit done than rage, for good
• 7:01
  Speaker 3: or for bad.
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  Speaker 2: It seems like rage really moves the needle. And I
• 7:06
  Speaker 2: think that that emotion and that approach shouldn't be thrown
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  Speaker 2: out when you're talking about a pursuit of peace or contentment.
• 7:15
  Speaker 2: I think it takes sweat equity. It would take blood
• 7:17
  Speaker 2: being drawn. I don't believe that we're as evolved enough
• 7:23
  Speaker 2: species to just behave as we intellectually can agree we
• 7:29
  Speaker 2: should be. I don't see it happening.
• 7:34
  Speaker 3: We can all agree with it.
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: In an open forum, enough of us go back on
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  Speaker 2: our own and make what we're doing. You know?
• 7:44
  Speaker 3: It's a good idea.
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: But boy, when it's We're cornered, and what we got's
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  Speaker 2: being possibly trespassed on?
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  Speaker 3: Be very primal.
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  Speaker 4: Some lines need to be drawn.
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  Speaker 3: I believe so.
• 8:00
  Speaker 4: Model the rise, not the result.
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  Speaker 3: I like that.
• 8:03
  Speaker 4: Model the rise, not the result, because the result is
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  Speaker 4: where they're at now. Do not ask Warren Buffett about
• 8:10
  Speaker 4: how long he spends reading the newspaper and poring over
• 8:13
  Speaker 4: old books. That guy was a hustler. He was a
• 8:16
  Speaker 4: hustler when he was young. What did you do when
• 8:18
  Speaker 4: you were at the stage that I am at, not
• 8:20
  Speaker 4: what do you do now? Because I want to get
• 8:23
  Speaker 4: to where you are. That means I don't do what
• 8:24
  Speaker 4: you do now. I do what you did to get there.
• 8:27
  Speaker 3: Don't study the result. What was the person doing when
• 8:29
  Speaker 3: they got there?
• 8:30
  Speaker 2: And everybody who's achieved something great was some sort of outlaw,
• 8:36
  Speaker 2: some sort of hustler, out of balance, out of whack,
• 8:39
  Speaker 2: dark times. Whoa.
• 8:41
  Speaker 3: Still wakes up in the middle of the night and
• 8:43
  Speaker 3: glad they're wearing a mouth.
• 8:44
  Speaker 2: Guard because they'd have chipped all their teeth with that
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  Speaker 2: fucking nightmare they were having about those things they did
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  Speaker 2: back then.
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  Speaker 3: I'm one of those.
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  Speaker 4: Without complacency, trust that time is on your side. What
• 8:56
  Speaker 4: do you mean?
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, man. Don't get ahead or behind it. And I
• 9:00
  Speaker 3: can get in a rush. And I haven't found. Look,
• 9:04
  Speaker 3: and I know how to hustle. And let's go. The
• 9:07
  Speaker 3: clock's ticking. We're all behind. All hands on deck. We
• 9:09
  Speaker 3: got to bust ass. No time for pause. There's no sleep.
• 9:12
  Speaker 3: No nothing. Get the caffeine out. Let's go. Sometimes we
• 9:15
  Speaker 3: got to do that.
• 9:15
  Speaker 2: But that is usually because an unforeseen circumstance has happened.
• 9:19
  Speaker 2: There's a crisis we got to deal with.
• 9:21
  Speaker 3: Or we've procrastinated and put myself in that position.
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: We got to cram. But it's not those two circumstances.
• 9:31
  Speaker 2: We got to watch ourselves getting ahead of time. And
• 9:35
  Speaker 2: it's on your side. It's a little what I mean
• 9:37
  Speaker 2: about the living longer and living more quality. Time's on
• 9:40
  Speaker 2: our side. And we're forced to think and feel, especially today,
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: with how fast things move, that more productivity, faster pace,
• 9:49
  Speaker 2: more information, faster pace.
• 9:50
  Speaker 3: It's better.
• 9:52
  Speaker 2: We're ahead of time a lot. and but time's still
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: moving at the same speed and they're not giving more
• 10:01
  Speaker 2: than 24 hours a day even though me like a
• 10:02
  Speaker 2: lot of people are looking for more there's not there's
• 10:05
  Speaker 2: not any more unless you just want to change your
• 10:07
  Speaker 2: work day and some people do me I need my
• 10:10
  Speaker 2: nine and a half hours sleep if I want to
• 10:11
  Speaker 2: say I'm getting four hours sleep and get five and
• 10:12
  Speaker 2: a half hours more of a work day to be
• 10:14
  Speaker 2: more productive I would but not to making that trade
• 10:16
  Speaker 2: off it's on our side it's the Lego set man
• 10:20
  Speaker 2: And you sit there and you get in a rush.
• 10:21
  Speaker 3: You don't read the directions. You get to the end
• 10:23
  Speaker 3: and you've got 12 pieces left. And you're like, shit.
• 10:25
  Speaker 3: Because you got in a hurry. You got ahead of time.
• 10:28
  Speaker 3: Instead of just that feeling of, I've checked out what I.
• 10:32
  Speaker 2: Need to do and it's all adding up and this
• 10:33
  Speaker 2: thing's built right and the foundation's right and boom, there's
• 10:35
  Speaker 2: the last piece.
• 10:36
  Speaker 3: It fits.
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: Voila.
• 10:37
  Speaker 3: It was with time. Time's on our side. It's not
• 10:40
  Speaker 3: an enemy. The end.
• 10:43
  Speaker 2: Death is not the enemy. I do believe that part of,
• 10:47
  Speaker 2: you know, Not in a rush to get there. And
• 10:49
  Speaker 2: we can stave it. We want to stave it off sometimes.
• 10:52
  Speaker 2: And that can be a screaming fight. And partially denial
• 10:56
  Speaker 2: can help us get there.
• 10:56
  Speaker 3: I understand that.
• 10:57
  Speaker 2: But still, it's on our side. It's going to happen.
• 11:00
  Speaker 2: And since it's going to happen, and that's non-negotiable, might
• 11:06
  Speaker 2: as well go, well, I'm not going to rush to
• 11:10
  Speaker 2: try and make more of it than there is. I
• 11:12
  Speaker 2: want to try and spend the time I got as
• 11:15
  Speaker 2: well as I can.
• 11:16
  Speaker 3: To produce something.
• 11:18
  Speaker 2: Succeed, achieve, whatever those things are, but also at a
• 11:23
  Speaker 2: pace that I'm me, that I like to dance to.
• 11:28
  Speaker 2: I like the give and the take. I like the reverb.
• 11:30
  Speaker 2: I like the cause and effect of how things are
• 11:34
  Speaker 2: happening at this pace.
• 11:36
  Speaker 3: I overthink a lot. And when I've heard myself back,
• 11:40
  Speaker 3: I'm like going, dude, you're kind.
• 11:44
  Speaker 2: Of, seeing so much significance that none of that shit's significant.
• 11:53
  Speaker 2: Every detailed frame you're giving it a proper name.
• 11:58
  Speaker 4: You've got this great line where you say, so many
• 11:59
  Speaker 4: people are obsessed with how to live longer instead of
• 12:02
  Speaker 4: how to live better. How do you come to think
• 12:04
  Speaker 4: about that?
• 12:06
  Speaker 3: I'm for it, the longevity. I'm for it. But in
• 12:11
  Speaker 3: the pursuit of it, are we measuring quality of life
• 12:14
  Speaker 3: along the way? Some people aren't.
• 12:17
  Speaker 2: And I personally don't want to have the highest number,
• 12:21
  Speaker 2: but then go, oh, I need fun, or I didn't
• 12:25
  Speaker 2: enjoy that, or that sucked. Profit measures quality with the quantity.
• 12:31
  Speaker 2: So I'm saying real success is when you have profit. Well,
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: really great longevity would be for those quality years, quality
• 12:39
  Speaker 2: time left in this life. I also say that because
• 12:43
  Speaker 2: while I'm not looking forward to it, I'm not really
• 12:45
  Speaker 2: afraid of death. or dying not looking forward to it
• 12:50
  Speaker 2: shaking my boots if I'm face to face with that
• 12:52
  Speaker 2: great white you know what I mean I'm not looking
• 12:54
  Speaker 2: forward to it but I see it as a obviously
• 12:59
  Speaker 2: it's inevitable and obviously I personally see it as a
• 13:01
  Speaker 2: hopefully a comma you know not a period so tomorrow
• 13:09
  Speaker 2: is not today's measurement when the misery is bad enough
• 13:12
  Speaker 2: right These people don't have the suffering consideration. It's a privilege, man.
• 13:20
  Speaker 2: I'm trying to put food on the table right now.
• 13:22
  Speaker 2: I'm paying my rent tonight. You want to talk to
• 13:23
  Speaker 2: me about investing in my future? And I say, and
• 13:28
  Speaker 2: that's part of what faith and religion are for. To
• 13:31
  Speaker 2: help those in misery hang on to a hope that
• 13:33
  Speaker 2: will most likely not be served them in this life.
• 13:36
  Speaker 2: To sell them belief and faith that they will be
• 13:39
  Speaker 2: served in the next life.
• 13:42
  Speaker 3: And what if there is nothing there, man? What if
• 13:44
  Speaker 3: there's nothing to hope for? What if there's no next?
• 13:46
  Speaker 3: I don't know.
• 13:50
  Speaker 2: But either way, in misery here or without a heaven there,
• 13:55
  Speaker 2: not having any hope or faith in anything is a
• 13:57
  Speaker 2: certain way to remain where you are forever. But if
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: you can find something that you can keep going, something
• 14:05
  Speaker 2: that no matter how small to look forward to and
• 14:07
  Speaker 2: continually have faith in and chase, well, then your life
• 14:10
  Speaker 2: here is going to be better now Heaven or not.
• 14:14
  Speaker 3: Let's go to the dream. Let's flip that script.
• 14:18
  Speaker 2: I always have gone from nonfiction to say, let's make
• 14:20
  Speaker 2: that the dream. Just keep living. Art emulates life.
• 14:24
  Speaker 3: Let's go to dreams. Let's go to poems, prayers. These
• 14:27
  Speaker 3: are pursuits of an ideal beauty. These are in between
• 14:30
  Speaker 3: the lines. This is in between the math.
• 14:32
  Speaker 2: This is not academic. This is not intellectual. These are
• 14:34
  Speaker 2: ideals that we pursue. The beginner's mind that we have
• 14:37
  Speaker 2: as a child before we know worse. And I don't
• 14:40
  Speaker 2: want to be ignorant. I don't want to be foolishly optimistic.
• 14:42
  Speaker 2: Let's look to those and believe that we can still
• 14:44
  Speaker 2: make those real. I grew up only knowing sort of
• 14:50
  Speaker 2: the courage of the persistence. You're resilient, endure, get up,
• 14:54
  Speaker 2: dust yourself off, go. The problem with that, the Achilles
• 14:57
  Speaker 2: heel with that is if you get up and you
• 14:59
  Speaker 2: have the courage to keep on going every time and
• 15:03
  Speaker 2: get up and dust yourself off, you make the same
• 15:06
  Speaker 2: mistakes each time around because you never backed up To
• 15:10
  Speaker 2: have what I've now learned and still learning is the
• 15:12
  Speaker 2: courage to go, no, I'm going to let some people
• 15:15
  Speaker 2: pass me in the race right now because I'm going
• 15:16
  Speaker 2: to look at why I keep stepping in that damn
• 15:18
  Speaker 2: same pothole and twisting my ankle.
• 15:19
  Speaker 3: The same spot.
• 15:21
  Speaker 2: Why I keep failing when I try to get that
• 15:24
  Speaker 2: next spot in this relationship.
• 15:26
  Speaker 3: There is a.
• 15:29
  Speaker 4: Unique sort of circle of hell that is reserved for
• 15:33
  Speaker 4: when you keep on making the same mistake over and
• 15:36
  Speaker 4: over again. That you've done it. You've had to pay
• 15:40
  Speaker 4: the penance, say that you're sorry, and then arrive straight
• 15:44
  Speaker 4: back at the same place.
• 15:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I think there's a hell in the mirror. Then
• 15:49
  Speaker 2: I think it can become a living hell. I cut
• 15:53
  Speaker 2: that poem in there, Daymares.
• 15:55
  Speaker 3: I love that one.
• 15:56
  Speaker 5: I do too.
• 15:57
  Speaker 3: Nightmares suck, but at least you wake up. And they're over.
• 16:01
  Speaker 3: It's the ones that stick with you when you wake
• 16:03
  Speaker 3: up and go through your day that are right there.
• 16:05
  Speaker 3: Those are the ones. That's the living hell. I think
• 16:08
  Speaker 3: that's what you're talking about.
• 16:10
  Speaker 2: And you repeat offend enough, word gets out. Circles gets out.
• 16:16
  Speaker 2: People doubt you. On your approach, you're like, yeah, but
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: don't do this. I mean, all of a sudden, you're
• 16:23
  Speaker 2: going places. You've got to look over your shoulder. You've
• 16:26
  Speaker 2: got to see who's there that I didn't pay back.
• 16:27
  Speaker 2: Who do I owe?
• 16:28
  Speaker 3: What bridge did I burn? What person did I betray
• 16:30
  Speaker 3: to get where I am? That's a life. That's a
• 16:32
  Speaker 3: living hell.
• 16:33
  Speaker 4: In the modern world, you can move from city to city.
• 16:37
  Speaker 4: At least you can, in some regard, leave your reputation behind. However,
• 16:42
  Speaker 4: if you lose your reputation with yourself, if you no
• 16:46
  Speaker 4: longer trust you, I don't keep my own word. I
• 16:49
  Speaker 4: know that I'm not a trustworthy person. I keep making
• 16:51
  Speaker 4: promises to myself and to other people and I keep
• 16:53
  Speaker 4: on breaking them. I keep doing something that hurts other
• 16:57
  Speaker 4: people or the same person. They don't trust me anymore and, oh,
• 17:04
  Speaker 4: I don't trust me anymore.
• 17:08
  Speaker 2: The rom-com time, that was definitely me doing the work
• 17:13
  Speaker 2: I was doing and only being able to do the
• 17:14
  Speaker 2: work I was doing and offer the roles I was
• 17:16
  Speaker 2: getting the rom-coms, was eating at me.
• 17:20
  Speaker 3: Because I felt like I could... Life is good, man.
• 17:23
  Speaker 3: I make good money. I feel like I can roll
• 17:26
  Speaker 3: out of bed and do one of these tomorrow morning.
• 17:27
  Speaker 2: Well, that's cool. I'm the go-to guy for this. I
• 17:33
  Speaker 2: was countered by... I had met Camilla, fallen in love.
• 17:36
  Speaker 2: She's now pregnant with her first child. My life was
• 17:40
  Speaker 2: extremely vital. And I was alive, cried harder, laughed louder,
• 17:44
  Speaker 2: felt more joy, all those things. But my work was like,
• 17:46
  Speaker 2: all right. And I was like, well, I wish my
• 17:49
  Speaker 2: work could be as challenging or as vital as my life.
• 17:52
  Speaker 2: And I remember looking in the mirror going, well, be
• 17:54
  Speaker 2: glad right now. Appreciate that it's not the other way around.
• 17:58
  Speaker 2: But can I have my work challenge my lifestyle in
• 18:00
  Speaker 2: this vitality? Yeah, if I do some dramas I want
• 18:04
  Speaker 2: to do, well, those aren't coming.
• 18:05
  Speaker 3: All right, if I can't do what I want to do,
• 18:06
  Speaker 3: let me quit and do what I want to do.
• 18:08
  Speaker 2: Now, that was, yeah, it was definitely courageous. I did
• 18:12
  Speaker 2: honestly think I'd written myself a one-way ticket out of Hollywood.
• 18:16
  Speaker 3: People close to me, basically.
• 18:19
  Speaker 2: Almost everybody besides my wife, was like, what is your
• 18:24
  Speaker 2: major malfunction, little brother?
• 18:25
  Speaker 3: You got it made. Why are you.
• 18:30
  Speaker 2: throwing a jackknife in this. You're tripping yourself running downhill, man.
• 18:33
  Speaker 2: You did it. I had my wife and myself to
• 18:41
  Speaker 2: remind myself of that 4 a.m. clarity that I had
• 18:46
  Speaker 2: in tears when I was like, no. I'm rolling the dice.
• 18:53
  Speaker 2: I'm sticking with it. Yeah, man.
• 18:55
  Speaker 3: I did think I wrote myself a ticket out of Hollywood.
• 18:57
  Speaker 2: I did look at other vocations, become a teacher, a
• 19:03
  Speaker 2: wildlife guide. I seriously look at those things. But over time,
• 19:07
  Speaker 2: and it was about 20 months, it was gone long enough,
• 19:09
  Speaker 2: had found anonymity enough, was not in your living room,
• 19:11
  Speaker 2: in a theater, in a rom-com, you didn't seem on
• 19:13
  Speaker 2: a beach shirtless.
• 19:15
  Speaker 3: Where is he?
• 19:16
  Speaker 2: Turning down the $ 14. 5 million offer, many people go, oh shit,
• 19:20
  Speaker 2: what's he up to? You don't just step out of
• 19:23
  Speaker 2: Hollywood unless you turn that down because you've got a plan.
• 19:27
  Speaker 2: You got somewhere you want to go. And I think
• 19:29
  Speaker 2: that made me more attractive as a new novel idea.
• 19:33
  Speaker 2: But that was, yeah, that risk, I think it's fair
• 19:36
  Speaker 2: to say that took a fair amount of courage from me.
• 19:39
  Speaker 4: For a lot of people, their work feels more vital
• 19:43
  Speaker 4: than their life.
• 19:43
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 19:45
  Speaker 4: Is that a shiny object mirage that they need to
• 19:49
  Speaker 4: rid themselves of?
• 19:51
  Speaker 2: If you can and you're willing to, yeah. Look, that's
• 19:55
  Speaker 2: part of why I started writing. The script flipped on
• 20:00
  Speaker 2: me five years ago. I was like, I was feeling
• 20:05
  Speaker 2: like my work was more vital than my life. I
• 20:08
  Speaker 2: felt like I was going through the motions more in
• 20:09
  Speaker 2: my life, but I was really getting major life experiences
• 20:15
  Speaker 2: through my work. And so that was a challenge to myself,
• 20:18
  Speaker 2: which led to the writing, which was a more direct experience.
• 20:22
  Speaker 2: Can I put a word down without? It's my script
• 20:25
  Speaker 2: and without my performance on it, without music, without pictures.
• 20:29
  Speaker 2: So that was an inward journey that I'm still on.
• 20:33
  Speaker 5: Yes!
• 20:35
  Speaker 3: Confidence. Identity. Testing it out and it can work.
• 20:40
  Speaker 2: Confidence to go, I'm going to try and pull this off.
• 20:43
  Speaker 3: Maybe get away with it. Maybe it won't work. Pulling
• 20:46
  Speaker 3: things off.
• 20:48
  Speaker 2: And I have an innate ability for something that I
• 20:50
  Speaker 2: believe I have the innate ability.
• 20:52
  Speaker 3: And I learned to, the reason behind.
• 20:56
  Speaker 2: That instinct and how to, where's the right time, timing.
• 21:00
  Speaker 3: Oh, it'll work, I think, right here. Who's the audience
• 21:03
  Speaker 3: I'm talking to? Oh, yeah, I'm going to make a.
• 21:06
  Speaker 2: Plan for that cell, if it's all cells, for that transaction,
• 21:10
  Speaker 2: or whatever it is, and bam, it hits, and it
• 21:12
  Speaker 2: lands like I wanted it to.
• 21:14
  Speaker 3: Gosh, damn it, was that deja vu? It happened. That's
• 21:18
  Speaker 3: how I saw it. That, I get confidence from that.
• 21:23
  Speaker 2: I don't think it's what the mystics meant when they
• 21:25
  Speaker 2: were like, be disattached. I think it meant go embrace,
• 21:29
  Speaker 2: but for highs and lows, and pains and pleasures, understand
• 21:34
  Speaker 2: that those outward things are not The things to be
• 21:37
  Speaker 2: attached to for your own identity.
• 21:38
  Speaker 3: It's got to be inward first. Enjoy those. Partake. But
• 21:42
  Speaker 3: don't become attached to those for your measure.
• 21:48
  Speaker 4: Without complacency, trust that time is on your side.
• 21:50
  Speaker 3: What do you mean? Yeah, man.
• 21:52
  Speaker 2: Don't get ahead or behind it. And I can get
• 21:56
  Speaker 2: in a rush. Look, and I know how to hustle.
• 21:58
  Speaker 2: And let's go. The clock's ticking.
• 22:00
  Speaker 3: We're all behind. All hands on deck. We got to
• 22:02
  Speaker 3: bust ass. No time for pause. There's no sleep. No nothing.
• 22:05
  Speaker 3: Get the caffeine out. Let's go. Sometimes we got to
• 22:07
  Speaker 3: do that.
• 22:08
  Speaker 2: But that is usually because an unforeseen circumstance has happened.
• 22:12
  Speaker 2: That there's a crisis we got to deal with. Or
• 22:14
  Speaker 2: we've procrastinated and put myself in that position. We got
• 22:18
  Speaker 2: to cram. But it's not those two circumstances. We got
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: to watch ourself getting ahead of time. And it's on
• 22:28
  Speaker 2: your side. It's a little what I mean about the
• 22:31
  Speaker 2: living longer and living more quality.
• 22:32
  Speaker 3: Time's on our side.
• 22:34
  Speaker 2: And we're forced to think and feel, especially today, with
• 22:38
  Speaker 2: how fast things move, that more productivity, faster pace, more information,
• 22:43
  Speaker 2: faster pace, it's better. We're ahead of time a lot.
• 22:49
  Speaker 2: But time's still moving at the same speed. And they're
• 22:53
  Speaker 2: not giving more than 24 hours a day, even though me,
• 22:55
  Speaker 2: like a lot of people, are looking for more.
• 22:56
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 22:57
  Speaker 2: There's not any more unless you just want to change
• 22:59
  Speaker 2: your workday. And some people do. Me, I need my
• 23:02
  Speaker 2: nine and a half hours sleep. If I want to
• 23:04
  Speaker 2: say I'm getting four hours sleep and get five and
• 23:05
  Speaker 2: a half hours more of a workday to be more productive,
• 23:07
  Speaker 2: I would, but not to making that trade-off.
• 23:11
  Speaker 3: It's on our side.
• 23:12
  Speaker 2: And when we're feeling like we're dancing with time, I
• 23:17
  Speaker 2: know I'm usually getting more done at the same pace
• 23:22
  Speaker 2: that It's the John Wooden, a great basketball coach for UCLA.
• 23:28
  Speaker 2: Be quick, but don't be in a hurry. That was
• 23:30
  Speaker 2: his note to his basketball players.
• 23:33
  Speaker 3: Be quick, but don't be in a hurry. You will
• 23:35
  Speaker 3: miss things.
• 23:36
  Speaker 2: You know, it's the Lego set, man. And you sit
• 23:40
  Speaker 2: there and you get in a rush. You don't read
• 23:41
  Speaker 2: the directions. You get to the end and you've got
• 23:43
  Speaker 2: 12 pieces left.
• 23:43
  Speaker 3: You're like, shit. Because you got in a hurry. You
• 23:47
  Speaker 3: got ahead of time instead of just.
• 23:50
  Speaker 2: That feeling of, I've checked out what I need to do,
• 23:52
  Speaker 2: and it's all adding up, and this thing's built right,
• 23:54
  Speaker 2: and the foundation's right, and boom, there's the last piece.
• 23:56
  Speaker 3: It fits.
• 23:56
  Speaker 2: Voila.
• 23:57
  Speaker 3: It was with time. Time's on our side. It's not
• 24:00
  Speaker 3: an enemy. The end. Death is not the enemy.
• 24:04
  Speaker 2: I do believe that part of, you know, not in
• 24:08
  Speaker 2: a rush to get there, and we can stave it.
• 24:10
  Speaker 2: We want to stave it off sometimes, and that can
• 24:12
  Speaker 2: be a screaming fight, and partially denial.
• 24:15
  Speaker 3: Can help us get there. I understand that, but still,
• 24:18
  Speaker 3: It's on our side. It's going to happen.
• 24:19
  Speaker 2: And since it's going to happen, and that's non-negotiable, might
• 24:26
  Speaker 2: as well go, well, I'm not going to rush to
• 24:30
  Speaker 2: try and make more of it than there is. I
• 24:32
  Speaker 2: want to try and spend the time I got as
• 24:35
  Speaker 2: well as I can to produce, succeed, achieve, whatever those
• 24:40
  Speaker 2: things are, but also at a pace that I'm me,
• 24:46
  Speaker 2: that I like to dance to. I like the give
• 24:49
  Speaker 2: and the take. I like the reverb. I like the
• 24:53
  Speaker 2: cause and effect of how things are happening at this pace.
• 24:56
  Speaker 2: How are we orienting ourselves now since time is speeding
• 25:00
  Speaker 2: up so much faster with AI?
• 25:01
  Speaker 3: I want to ask you this with AI. And I
• 25:04
  Speaker 3: mean this, this is an objective question. With AI. With
• 25:09
  Speaker 3: all these podcasts, with all these wealth.
• 25:11
  Speaker 2: Of information that people can get at all times and
• 25:13
  Speaker 2: no one's listening to music anymore. They're listening to everybody
• 25:16
  Speaker 2: talk about this and reading up on this and they're
• 25:18
  Speaker 2: finding out the answers in 10 seconds that would have
• 25:20
  Speaker 2: taken them 10 days to get before. Do people sound
• 25:23
  Speaker 2: smarter to you? No.
• 25:26
  Speaker 3: Me neither.
• 25:27
  Speaker 2: They don't sound dumber. I do think, so we were
• 25:32
  Speaker 2: talking about if everything's significant, nothing's significant at all. I
• 25:35
  Speaker 2: do think that I talk to people that feel like
• 25:38
  Speaker 2: they're hyperly punching their information absolutely great, just splashing out,
• 25:44
  Speaker 2: but I'm going, dude what was the theme there did
• 25:47
  Speaker 2: you have a bass guitar in your band you need
• 25:48
  Speaker 2: a bass guitar or at least somebody on percussion hold
• 25:50
  Speaker 2: it down because i didn't hear the theme i didn't
• 25:52
  Speaker 2: hear the thread it was digits where was the soul
• 25:56
  Speaker 2: in that story which goes back to the quality with
• 26:00
  Speaker 2: the quantity the quantity of information but can we have
• 26:02
  Speaker 2: the soul in it where ah i hear the rhyme
• 26:06
  Speaker 2: ah this rhyme to that those digits There's rhyme to
• 26:08
  Speaker 2: those facts.
• 26:09
  Speaker 3: Oh, I see how they add up. Oh, but what
• 26:11
  Speaker 3: if you put them in this order? Ah, they add
• 26:13
  Speaker 3: up to another thing. Or actually, they may add up
• 26:15
  Speaker 3: to the same damn thing. Interesting. Now I've got a rhyme.
• 26:18
  Speaker 3: Now there's a song.
• 26:19
  Speaker 2: That happens when time's on your side and you're looking
• 26:22
  Speaker 2: at it without complacency.
• 26:24
  Speaker 3: Like, start now. That doesn't mean time's on my side.
• 26:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah, dude.
• 26:27
  Speaker 3: In Chilla. When it happens, it'll happen.
• 26:30
  Speaker 2: No.
• 26:31
  Speaker 3: I'm like, wake up. Clock's ticking. It's on your side.
• 26:37
  Speaker 3: Now just move with it. Dance with it. Put some
• 26:40
  Speaker 3: soul with the facts.
• 26:44
  Speaker 2: So I move out to Hollywood. I did Days Confused
• 26:48
  Speaker 2: the summer of 92. I go back and graduate from
• 26:51
  Speaker 2: University of Texas at Austin in 93. I do a
• 26:55
  Speaker 2: quick stint in this Texas Chainsaw Massacre film. And then
• 26:57
  Speaker 2: I drive out with my U-Haul and 2,000 bucks to
• 27:00
  Speaker 2: sleep on the couch of that guy that I met
• 27:02
  Speaker 2: in the bar two years prior who cast me in
• 27:05
  Speaker 2: my first job.
• 27:06
  Speaker 6: $ 2, 000.
• 27:08
  Speaker 2: I know I'm sleeping on his couch, not paying rent. $ 2, 000
• 27:10
  Speaker 2: is going to go pretty quickly. And I'm starting to,
• 27:13
  Speaker 2: after about two weeks, I'm going to die, man.
• 27:14
  Speaker 6: I need to, could you give me a meeting with
• 27:17
  Speaker 6: an agent, man? I need to get an agent. I
• 27:19
  Speaker 6: need a job.
• 27:19
  Speaker 2: And he snaps at me, cusses me out and tells me, look,
• 27:23
  Speaker 2: this town smells needy.
• 27:25
  Speaker 3: You're done.
• 27:25
  Speaker 2: What you need to do is get the hell out
• 27:29
  Speaker 2: of here. and go do something with your buds and
• 27:31
  Speaker 2: forget about Hollywood and what you think you need.
• 27:35
  Speaker 3: Anyway, I did.
• 27:35
  Speaker 2: I took off with my two buddies with what little
• 27:38
  Speaker 2: money we had and we motorcycled through Europe for six weeks. Well,
• 27:43
  Speaker 2: by the time I got back, I forgot all about
• 27:46
  Speaker 2: needing an agent or, oh, I need to get a part.
• 27:50
  Speaker 2: I just had great life experience for six weeks. And
• 27:54
  Speaker 2: so He then brings it up about a week after
• 27:56
  Speaker 2: I'm back and goes, you're ready.
• 27:57
  Speaker 6: I go, for what? And he goes, tomorrow morning, we
• 27:59
  Speaker 6: got the meeting with the agent. I'm like, oh, great.
• 28:02
  Speaker 2: He was right on the money because I was able
• 28:04
  Speaker 2: to go into that meeting and be myself, be involved
• 28:09
  Speaker 2: in that meeting and not be so impressed that I
• 28:11
  Speaker 2: got that meeting. You know, it's a trick, but it
• 28:15
  Speaker 2: works in our life. I mean, sometimes if something is
• 28:20
  Speaker 2: number one on our list and we've got.
• 28:21
  Speaker 5: To have it.
• 28:22
  Speaker 3: Oh, we need it.
• 28:22
  Speaker 6: We need it. A lot of times we don't get it.
• 28:26
  Speaker 6: Think about it.
• 28:26
  Speaker 2: Whether it's that girl or whether it's that friend or
• 28:28
  Speaker 2: whatever it is, man, if you make them the number
• 28:30
  Speaker 2: one thing in your life, they kind of go like, well,
• 28:32
  Speaker 2: what else did you have going before you came to me?
• 28:35
  Speaker 6: You know what I mean?
• 28:35
  Speaker 2: I want somebody who had their shit together before they
• 28:38
  Speaker 2: came to me a little bit. If I'm your everything,
• 28:41
  Speaker 2: then I'm probably, a lot of times people will go
• 28:43
  Speaker 2: or situations will say, no, we don't want you because
• 28:46
  Speaker 2: you need us too bad. Something about taking that trip
• 28:50
  Speaker 2: to Germany got that need out of my mind and
• 28:54
  Speaker 2: The idea of getting a job or an agent in
• 28:57
  Speaker 2: Hollywood became subliminally number two on my list of priorities,
• 29:02
  Speaker 2: just by sure that I kind of forgotten about it.
• 29:05
  Speaker 6: It wasn't thinking about it all the time.
• 29:08
  Speaker 2: Well, that allowed me to relax, to be involved in
• 29:10
  Speaker 2: a meeting with an agent where they accepted me to
• 29:13
  Speaker 2: then go out on auditions and actually get them because
• 29:16
  Speaker 2: I was like, I really want this, but I don't
• 29:19
  Speaker 2: need it.
• 29:20
  Speaker 6: And there's a very, there's a big difference.
• 29:21
  Speaker 2: And Hollywood and fame, there's a game in Hollywood.
• 29:26
  Speaker 6: It is an affair. It's not necessarily a marriage.
• 29:29
  Speaker 3: And there's a.
• 29:29
  Speaker 2: Game to play, and it's better to want it and
• 29:32
  Speaker 2: not need it.
• 29:34
  Speaker 5: The idea of confidence, you've got the Southern charm, there's
• 29:38
  Speaker 5: no question, and I'm sure... you have a certain level
• 29:41
  Speaker 5: of awareness about that. You know, one thing that I
• 29:43
  Speaker 5: find so interesting about actors is they're so good at
• 29:47
  Speaker 5: conveying emotion. They understand how they're coming across. I mean,
• 29:50
  Speaker 5: that level of self-awareness is obviously part of their power.
• 29:54
  Speaker 5: When you think about developing self-awareness and translating that into
• 29:57
  Speaker 5: confidence and Is that tied to how much preparation you do?
• 30:02
  Speaker 5: How do you begin to, in your early 20s, have
• 30:05
  Speaker 5: the kind of confidence where you can walk in with
• 30:07
  Speaker 5: a big swagger, not need it, and captivate people like that?
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: I feel like self-consciousness is the enemy of most authentic
• 30:18
  Speaker 1: artistic expression. If I'm thinking about what other people are
• 30:22
  Speaker 1: going to think about this, that's when I do something
• 30:24
  Speaker 1: that sucks. That's when I pull my punches or I
• 30:26
  Speaker 1: make it awkward or weird. You kind of have to
• 30:28
  Speaker 1: be free flowing in the moment about it.
• 30:31
  Speaker 3: All right.
• 30:32
  Speaker 2: So if self-consciousness is being, can we say that's being objective?
• 30:36
  Speaker 2: You hop out and you get, you have it, you
• 30:38
  Speaker 2: hop into your eye in the sky and you have
• 30:39
  Speaker 2: a look down at yourself and the third person.
• 30:42
  Speaker 3: How am I doing? How does this translate? How is it?
• 30:44
  Speaker 1: I think I would say being objective is positive. Self-consciousness
• 30:47
  Speaker 1: to me has a, has a, an element of kind
• 30:50
  Speaker 1: of shame to it. You're like anticipating what other people
• 30:52
  Speaker 1: are going to think. And you're, you're looking at how
• 30:55
  Speaker 1: awkward you are. Okay.
• 30:59
  Speaker 2: If you don't get hung up in that objective, I
• 31:05
  Speaker 2: think it's important. I think the subjective is the place,
• 31:08
  Speaker 2: the home base. Start at, and if you're confident enough
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: with that, you can hop to the objective and say,
• 31:13
  Speaker 2: how am I looking? Without getting self-conscious, just to see
• 31:18
  Speaker 2: the landscape, because I'm here, I'm a solo man.
• 31:22
  Speaker 3: But I've hopped out to have a look. What's the landscape? Oh, yeah,
• 31:25
  Speaker 3: it still looks smooth up there. There's no cliffs.
• 31:26
  Speaker 2: If your head's down, you don't run off it. It
• 31:31
  Speaker 2: looks like I'm doing what I intended to do. Oh,
• 31:34
  Speaker 2: it actually looks like it's getting received as I was
• 31:36
  Speaker 2: hoping it would be received.
• 31:37
  Speaker 3: But you've got to hop back.
• 31:38
  Speaker 6: And you can get back into.
• 31:39
  Speaker 3: The subjective because you can get caught. Looking at the
• 31:42
  Speaker 3: jumbotron of your life. Yes, yes, yes.
• 31:46
  Speaker 2: Any golfers out there, I bet you would tell you,
• 31:48
  Speaker 2: my best rounds were when I walked off the 18th
• 31:50
  Speaker 2: green and didn't know it.
• 31:51
  Speaker 3: Was my last hole.
• 31:52
  Speaker 6: Yes, yes.
• 31:52
  Speaker 1: Because you were holding the hole.
• 31:53
  Speaker 3: Because I was headed to the next. Yes.
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: Right, if you're aware that you are playing your best
• 31:59
  Speaker 1: game ever as you're playing it, that's when you fuck
• 32:01
  Speaker 1: it up.
• 32:02
  Speaker 3: That's when you bogey the 17th.
• 32:04
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 32:05
  Speaker 2: And bogey the three putt the 18th to lose by one.
• 32:08
  Speaker 2: It's choking at the finish line.
• 32:10
  Speaker 3: It's realizing... You.
• 32:12
  Speaker 2: And I have talked about that before. I'd have those
• 32:13
  Speaker 2: immortal finish lines that just go. And as long as
• 32:16
  Speaker 2: you trust that it's being recorded and that the strokes
• 32:20
  Speaker 2: are played. And yes, I counted my strokes right on
• 32:22
  Speaker 2: that hole and I signed it. Let me find out
• 32:25
  Speaker 2: how many under I was or how I played after
• 32:27
  Speaker 2: I'm done.
• 32:27
  Speaker 3: Come tell me. The proof's there.
• 32:30
  Speaker 2: But if I see it coming and I see that
• 32:32
  Speaker 2: end zone coming, what do we do? Yeah.
• 32:35
  Speaker 3: A little tight, a little self-conscious. Do I deserve to
• 32:39
  Speaker 3: be here? I think I'm doing really good. All of
• 32:42
  Speaker 3: a sudden, you're out of the moment. Your body's not behaving.
• 32:44
  Speaker 2: You're not performing the act that you've just been naturally
• 32:48
  Speaker 2: performing one at a time, one in a row, every moment,
• 32:51
  Speaker 2: every day.
• 32:52
  Speaker 1: It is weird that we all are totally unique, have
• 32:56
  Speaker 1: unique DNA.
• 32:57
  Speaker 3: We never exist before again.
• 32:59
  Speaker 1: And then we're like, well, what's everyone else doing?
• 33:02
  Speaker 6: I should do that.
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: There is something kind of sad about the way we
• 33:07
  Speaker 1: deliberately mute our colors or mimic other people's colors.
• 33:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but we also, it's wise, I think, to understand
• 33:19
  Speaker 2: the machinations of how populace works, how being in with
• 33:23
  Speaker 2: the group works, to understand the rules of each game,
• 33:26
  Speaker 2: knowing your zone and still being able to be yourself,
• 33:31
  Speaker 2: or still being yourself if you're playing a role to.
• 33:35
  Speaker 6: Get what you want.
• 33:36
  Speaker 3: It's like the Dylan thing. He was like, what is it? Like, no,
• 33:39
  Speaker 3: don't go. I don't know what all this be yourselves about, man.
• 33:41
  Speaker 3: It's like, you are what you create, man. We're all
• 33:44
  Speaker 3: our creations. That's a form of being yourself by going,
• 33:47
  Speaker 3: I'm a new creation every day. Yeah, yeah, totally. Which
• 33:51
  Speaker 3: you are.
• 33:52
  Speaker 6: Right.
• 33:52
  Speaker 3: If you want to be, you know? Yeah.
• 33:55
  Speaker 2: Whatever part that is you're playing. But it's... The best
• 33:59
  Speaker 2: ones you don't see him playing a part, but going
• 34:01
  Speaker 2: back to acting. In real life or in acting, you
• 34:04
  Speaker 2: don't see, or athletics, you don't see the work. You
• 34:07
  Speaker 2: don't see the, oh, there's a tell. Oh, I saw
• 34:12
  Speaker 2: him do a thing. He played an attitude.
• 34:14
  Speaker 3: He didn't play himself. You don't see those things. It's seamless.
• 34:20
  Speaker 3: And that way, that person is kind of, in a way,
• 34:22
  Speaker 3: everything to everybody or almost everything to everybody.
• 34:26
  Speaker 1: To me, it's like, do you want to be the
• 34:28
  Speaker 1: actor that gets the parts that Matthew McConaughey turns down?
• 34:32
  Speaker 1: Or do you want to get the parts that they're
• 34:34
  Speaker 1: offering to you because they want you? It's better to
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: be a category of one, to be a monopoly of yourself.
• 34:42
  Speaker 1: But most of us go, I don't know, I'd rather
• 34:45
  Speaker 1: just kind of get somebody else's leftovers.
• 34:47
  Speaker 3: Right, right, right. And sometimes those leftovers are damn worth getting.
• 34:52
  Speaker 3: But I hear you.
• 34:53
  Speaker 6: When you are.
• 34:55
  Speaker 3: When you're living and you feel like you're one of one.
• 34:58
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: You want to be the first person they ask because
• 35:00
  Speaker 1: that's what they wanted. Not like the third, fourth, fifth, unlimited.
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: But there's something safer about it, right? It's like it's
• 35:08
  Speaker 1: safer in one sense, but the ceiling is capped.
• 35:13
  Speaker 5: Now, why do you pursue things that scare you? Why
• 35:17
  Speaker 5: seek the role that's hard?
• 35:19
  Speaker 2: Because it costs me something. Because it costs me. It
• 35:23
  Speaker 2: comes with a price. It's a bit of that line,
• 35:25
  Speaker 2: don't pick a fight. It's not really a fight unless
• 35:26
  Speaker 2: you can lose it. It's not really a risk unless
• 35:29
  Speaker 2: you can lose the fight. I feel more alive in them.
• 35:34
  Speaker 2: I have an experience in the making of them. I'm
• 35:37
  Speaker 2: nervous every day I come to work. I feel like
• 35:43
  Speaker 2: when I nail a day and I knock it and
• 35:45
  Speaker 2: I know I did, I feel like, yes, I have
• 35:48
  Speaker 2: a measure at the end of the day of like,
• 35:49
  Speaker 2: You set out to do something. You prepared for it.
• 35:52
  Speaker 2: You had intention and you did it. And maybe even
• 35:55
  Speaker 2: found some magic in the day. I sleep good knowing
• 36:00
  Speaker 2: that I accomplished that day in building the architecture of
• 36:04
  Speaker 2: a character's arc through a story. And if I could
• 36:07
  Speaker 2: put the whole thing together and it comes out, one
• 36:09
  Speaker 2: whole performance turns out to be a beautiful song, an
• 36:12
  Speaker 2: original song of that character, then I'm like, yes. And
• 36:16
  Speaker 2: I know that I was highly responsible for that. I
• 36:19
  Speaker 2: was not solely responsible, but the most responsible for that.
• 36:23
  Speaker 2: And that gives me pleasure. That gives me gratification. That
• 36:28
  Speaker 2: makes me feel, gives me significance. That gives me confidence.
• 36:33
  Speaker 2: If I don't pull it off, and I do have
• 36:36
  Speaker 2: a day where I'm like, no, you didn't. And it
• 36:39
  Speaker 2: was my fault. I'd still, I would rather with these
• 36:42
  Speaker 2: kind of roles, I can look in the mirror and go,
• 36:44
  Speaker 2: so guess who's responsible for not pulling it off?
• 36:46
  Speaker 3: You, Conahay.
• 36:47
  Speaker 2: In the same way, when I go, guess who's responsible
• 36:49
  Speaker 2: for pulling off?
• 36:50
  Speaker 6: I like knowing who.
• 36:52
  Speaker 2: We remember the stuff we earn, the stuff we experience,
• 36:55
  Speaker 2: more than what the teacher tells us or what someone
• 36:57
  Speaker 2: gives us for free.
• 36:59
  Speaker 6: We just do.
• 36:59
  Speaker 2: We broke a proverbial sweat on it, whether it was
• 37:01
  Speaker 2: mental or physical or whatever.
• 37:03
  Speaker 3: We built it.
• 37:04
  Speaker 6: We understand.
• 37:05
  Speaker 2: We felt how we got it, how we achieved it,
• 37:08
  Speaker 2: how we got what we wanted. Those stick with us.
• 37:11
  Speaker 2: Whether we forget them intellectually, they were written in our lineage.
• 37:14
  Speaker 2: And they build resilience.
• 37:15
  Speaker 6: And they build resilience. A healthy, true optimism.
• 37:19
  Speaker 2: Going forward to know that, oh, no, I've worked for
• 37:21
  Speaker 2: something before and achieved it. Delayed gratification. Oh, there are
• 37:26
  Speaker 2: choices I can make today for myself that will pay
• 37:29
  Speaker 2: me back later in life. Mailbox money, as we call
• 37:33
  Speaker 2: it in the entertainment industry.
• 37:35
  Speaker 6: ROI.
• 37:36
  Speaker 2: There are specific personal choices we can make, and they're
• 37:40
  Speaker 2: worth considering. Look, I'm all for hedonism. I'm all for
• 37:43
  Speaker 2: immediate gratification, too. Sometimes it's like, yes, dude, it's Halloween.
• 37:46
  Speaker 2: Eat all the candy you want.
• 37:46
  Speaker 6: Go for it. It's not going to become a.
• 37:48
  Speaker 2: Habit day to day. There's certain nights where you're like, hey, guys,
• 37:50
  Speaker 2: tonight we're going to blow it out. The walls are
• 37:52
  Speaker 2: padded and we got nothing. We're off work on Monday.
• 37:55
  Speaker 6: Let's go.
• 37:56
  Speaker 2: You know, I mean, certain times to.
• 37:57
  Speaker 3: Say that's OK. But there's, you know, where is the.
• 38:03
  Speaker 2: Selfish choice, the selfless choice? Where is what we want
• 38:08
  Speaker 2: actually what we need? Where is what we need actually
• 38:11
  Speaker 2: what we want? Responsibility of freedom and the freedom in responsibility.
• 38:16
  Speaker 2: Life's more than just straight Saturdays with as much cake
• 38:18
  Speaker 2: as you want to eat.
• 38:19
  Speaker 3: It just is.
• 38:20
  Speaker 6: You will see how long you last doing that. If
• 38:22
  Speaker 6: you really do it.
• 38:22
  Speaker 2: You won't last that long. Responsibility is appreciation of a past.
• 38:28
  Speaker 2: It's building of a lineage. It's investing in ourselves. It's
• 38:31
  Speaker 2: investing in something we started to build yesterday that we
• 38:33
  Speaker 2: want to take into tomorrow. There's a response that gives
• 38:37
  Speaker 2: us freedom. So to actually have true freedom, we have
• 38:42
  Speaker 2: to be responsible, more responsible for certain things, for ourselves,
• 38:45
  Speaker 2: who we are. Constantly investigating and interrogating our better selves
• 38:51
  Speaker 2: to say, I'm going to be a little bit better
• 38:52
  Speaker 2: at this tomorrow. Knowing that we never land. There's no
• 38:57
  Speaker 2: ta-da moment. And that is one thing I think we
• 39:00
  Speaker 2: all got to watch because we all are so result-oriented. Oh,
• 39:03
  Speaker 2: if I keep doing this, I'm going to get to
• 39:04
  Speaker 2: that place of pure enlightenment.
• 39:06
  Speaker 6: I'm going to go, ta-da! Bullshit.
• 39:11
  Speaker 3: No, you don't.
• 39:12
  Speaker 2: Can it be a small ascension of evolution? Yes.
• 39:17
  Speaker 6: But there's no ta-da moment.
• 39:18
  Speaker 2: We're always chasing yet. And if we can get comfortable
• 39:22
  Speaker 2: and understand and laugh and and be ready to work
• 39:25
  Speaker 2: hard the fact that we're all just if we could
• 39:29
  Speaker 2: just say we're all just achieving our way to the
• 39:32
  Speaker 2: unachievable and that's as good as it gets and that's
• 39:36
  Speaker 2: pretty damn awesome that's the honey hole oh if everything's
• 39:41
  Speaker 2: significant there's no significance at all man some shit's just
• 39:44
  Speaker 2: like i don't have a capacity to deal with it
• 39:47
  Speaker 2: i don't really care It's how it is. Some of
• 39:49
  Speaker 2: the inevitables, and sometimes you've got to let those ride.
• 39:51
  Speaker 2: I'm going to deal with that now. I'm going to
• 39:52
  Speaker 2: deal with what I can deal with. I get the
• 39:54
  Speaker 2: mental meditations on that. And I listen to myself back,
• 39:58
  Speaker 2: and I'm like going, whoa, you need to get some sleep.
• 40:04
  Speaker 3: You need to have a drink. You need to relax.
• 40:07
  Speaker 4: What's the difference between a nice guy and a good man?
• 40:11
  Speaker 3: I was at a time when I was doing the rom-coms.
• 40:13
  Speaker 3: That's all I could do. I was feeling like.
• 40:15
  Speaker 2: My work was just me as a nice guy. And
• 40:17
  Speaker 2: in life, I was not just a nice guy. Like
• 40:19
  Speaker 2: I said, Camille was pregnant. I got a child coming.
• 40:22
  Speaker 2: I was feral with masculinity. And at work, maybe I
• 40:29
  Speaker 2: was feeling a bit neutered. And I was like, good
• 40:33
  Speaker 2: guy and a good man in life, but I'm just
• 40:35
  Speaker 2: a nice guy at work. Can I be at roles
• 40:38
  Speaker 2: that can be a good man? And that was trauma's.
• 40:41
  Speaker 2: Because in dramas you can stand for or stand against something.
• 40:44
  Speaker 2: Your ceiling for pleasure and your basement for fame are
• 40:47
  Speaker 2: up to you. How do you feel about it? And
• 40:50
  Speaker 2: no direction can go.
• 40:51
  Speaker 3: That's too much.
• 40:52
  Speaker 2: That's not enough. You got too angry there. Oh, you
• 40:57
  Speaker 2: meant that too much. That didn't come in a drama.
• 41:00
  Speaker 2: Those come in a rom-com. Because the emotions and how
• 41:03
  Speaker 2: you feel are compressed to be in a buoyant level
• 41:06
  Speaker 2: and a threshold that's up bouncing from cloud to cloud only.
• 41:09
  Speaker 2: Dramas are as much pain As much evil as you
• 41:12
  Speaker 2: want to go, as deep dark you want to go,
• 41:13
  Speaker 2: get there. Let's see how far you go. How high
• 41:16
  Speaker 2: you want to fly. How close to that sun you
• 41:19
  Speaker 2: get before you get burned. Go.
• 41:22
  Speaker 3: Let's see how far you go.
• 41:23
  Speaker 2: That's what you get in a drama. Much more like
• 41:25
  Speaker 2: real life. Being a good man is a lot harder
• 41:29
  Speaker 2: for good reason. You're not going to be most popular.
• 41:33
  Speaker 2: You're not going to be always most affable. It also
• 41:37
  Speaker 2: doesn't mean you've got to be a dick or an asshole.
• 41:40
  Speaker 3: It just means.
• 41:42
  Speaker 2: Sometimes you're going to go, I believe in this, this
• 41:44
  Speaker 2: is for me, and that is not for me. And
• 41:47
  Speaker 2: because that is not for me, if you do trespass
• 41:50
  Speaker 2: into my space upon me and my family, I will
• 41:55
  Speaker 2: do my best to cause consequences. And I'm going to
• 41:59
  Speaker 2: let you know that. I'm not going to intrude on you,
• 42:01
  Speaker 2: but if you trespass that, I'm going to stand up
• 42:05
  Speaker 2: for it.
• 42:06
  Speaker 3: And we can talk our way out of that?
• 42:08
  Speaker 4: Great.
• 42:11
  Speaker 3: No, it doesn't always work that way. You know?
• 42:15
  Speaker 2: A good man's not looking for trouble. But if it comes,
• 42:19
  Speaker 2: and if he or something he cares about and loves
• 42:21
  Speaker 2: were susceptible, being trespassed on by trouble, a good man
• 42:28
  Speaker 2: does what he can to do to stop that. A
• 42:30
  Speaker 2: truly masculine man is not macho. He's not chauvinist. But
• 42:36
  Speaker 2: he's damn sure masculine. Most masculine I've ever felt. after
• 42:41
  Speaker 2: the birth of my first child. Never were my head, heart,
• 42:46
  Speaker 2: and loins in such synchronicity and the power that I had. Was,
• 42:52
  Speaker 2: I mean, was probably the best husband ever at that
• 42:56
  Speaker 2: time too. Men want to be, and I don't know
• 43:01
  Speaker 2: if this is biological because I'm not saying women don't,
• 43:04
  Speaker 2: but men want to and are looking for ways to
• 43:08
  Speaker 2: be relied upon And so we say, yeah, but you
• 43:12
  Speaker 2: always want to be the savior and you always want
• 43:14
  Speaker 2: the solution. Okay.
• 43:16
  Speaker 3: Cool. Is there anything wrong with wanting to find the
• 43:20
  Speaker 3: solution to things? Great, let's work with that. Thank you, women,
• 43:28
  Speaker 3: for saying.
• 43:29
  Speaker 2: Glad you got the solution, but just listen to me
• 43:31
  Speaker 2: for a second longer because I'm not looking for a solution. Actually,
• 43:33
  Speaker 2: I just want to talk this out and I'll probably
• 43:35
  Speaker 2: answer my own question.
• 43:36
  Speaker 3: You know what I mean? Doesn't mean don't be The
• 43:41
  Speaker 3: male side of you that wants to find the solution
• 43:43
  Speaker 3: or wants to be relied upon in the pursuit of it.
• 43:46
  Speaker 3: Are we measuring quality of life along the way? Some
• 43:49
  Speaker 3: people aren't. And I personally don't want to have the
• 43:55
  Speaker 3: highest number.
• 43:57
  Speaker 2: But then go, well, I need fun or I didn't
• 44:00
  Speaker 2: enjoy that or I didn't.
• 44:02
  Speaker 3: That sucked.
• 44:06
  Speaker 2: I'm just trying to remind everyone that just like in business,
• 44:09
  Speaker 2: when I say success without the profit, we have plenty
• 44:10
  Speaker 2: of people that succeed.
• 44:12
  Speaker 3: If you've got the most money, the most toys, you succeed.
• 44:15
  Speaker 2: And we talked about those people earlier that have, at
• 44:17
  Speaker 2: the end of the day, have problems with their relationships
• 44:19
  Speaker 2: or they can't sleep. They didn't profit. They're not profiting
• 44:22
  Speaker 2: with their success. Profit measures quality with the quantity. So
• 44:26
  Speaker 2: I'm saying real success is when you have profit. Well,
• 44:30
  Speaker 2: really great longevity would be for.
• 44:33
  Speaker 3: Those quality years.
• 44:34
  Speaker 2: Quality time left in this life I also say that
• 44:38
  Speaker 2: because while I'm not looking forward to it I'm not
• 44:40
  Speaker 2: really afraid of death or dying not looking forward to
• 44:44
  Speaker 2: it shaking my boots if I'm face to face with
• 44:48
  Speaker 2: that great white you know.
• 44:49
  Speaker 3: What I mean I'm not looking forward to it but.
• 44:55
  Speaker 2: I see it as a obviously it's inevitable and obviously
• 44:58
  Speaker 2: I personally see it as a hopefully a comma you
• 45:01
  Speaker 2: know not a period so.
• 45:04
  Speaker 3: I do think inevitably you might be, if.
• 45:08
  Speaker 2: You're so obsessed with the projection length that you're going
• 45:12
  Speaker 2: to miss a couple of really, really worthwhile parties now
• 45:20
  Speaker 2: where you may learn something, have the great love of life,
• 45:23
  Speaker 2: take a certain risk that, oh, you may not make
• 45:27
  Speaker 2: it out of that, but we're going to do it anyway.
• 45:31
  Speaker 2: And I'm off work. It's a lot of my jam.
• 45:37
  Speaker 2: How far can we project in the future? Boy, the
• 45:39
  Speaker 2: further we can project, the further I think we can
• 45:41
  Speaker 2: see in the past. The more we have the ability
• 45:44
  Speaker 2: to invest in ourselves today to get that more ROI tomorrow.
• 45:47
  Speaker 2: I just think an obsession with the number can sometimes
• 45:51
  Speaker 2: get in the way.
• 45:51
  Speaker 3: Of seeing
• 45:53
  Speaker 2: More of an obsession with the quality and the meaning
• 45:56
  Speaker 2: of what we're doing right here, what's now and tomorrow.