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Toxicity of The Opposite Sex · 4 The Exchange

• Kevin: y'all, welcome back to 40 Exchange here with the gang. We got a good topic tonight. Listen, one of my homegirls hit me up. You know the homegirls always want some advice. And she hit me up and she said that he was she was out with another dude and her her her, I don't know if it's her main dude or her side dude, hit her up while she's with this guy. And and she said that she was at the movies and lied to him and said she was with a homegirl. You know. GoFredo: Mm, mm, mm, mm. Kevin: This guy proceeded to block her. She said he's sassy. He's sassy. For give for giving giving that giving that block. Now, you know, I had to give her some advice, but you know, I I think tonight we gotta talk about these relationships between your your homeboy and your homegirl. Are these relationships toxic for real? Man, lay, I'm a I'm you know me, I like to I I'm I'm ladies first, so lay I'm gonna start with you. LayTheDon: it depends on how you define toxic. GoFredo: The fu- Go get it, gang. LayTheDon: Because Kevin: I was gonna I'm like with this going already. GoFredo: But man, that's LayTheDon: Because here's the thing. One one thing one GoFredo: multiple definitions of toxic. LayTheDon: thing about females is we are big on the principle. Okay. We are not we're big on the principle rather than the reaction, right? And you know, as a female best friend, as a male best friend, y'all gonna think differently. So from a female perspective, right, Bayland is saying she was with a homegirl was just not to hurt his feelings. Because men can't really handle what they did shout. If she would have told him straight up, yeah, I was on a date with another nigga, I feel like he might not have been necessarily using the word mad, but he would have felt some type of way. Like, you know, considering the fact that he did block her, which means he felt some type of way that he was she was with a small enough of a nigga. From the male side of that, y'all only saw the fact that she was lying, that she might have been lying. However, Dude in said text message that she is talking about don't exactly know whether or not she's lying out. Lying or not, lying or not. He just knew that she was probably out with another nigga. And he felt some way blocked her. If niggas is blocking bitches for dating other niggas and y'all not together, y'all not locked it down, y'all ain't solid. I wanna use the word sassy, but that's a little been a little bitch. She's saying. GoFredo: That's go ahead, Colby. Kevin: Mm. Kobi: Ha ha. LayTheDon: Mm-hmm. Kevin: Hey, Kobe ain't like that. Kobe ain't like that. GoFredo: Yeah. Kobi: That that's crazy. LayTheDon: Mm-hmm. Kobi: wouldn't use the word sassy in the in the In the the situation, he's protecting himself from the toxicity that she dishing out. He had a gut feeling deep down that she could have been lying. And it turned out to be true that she was lying, so he acted accordingly without him even knowing he won up. I would have blocked the two. GoFredo: You just told the world. LayTheDon: Richard Dayton. She's a loud to date other woman she's a blow to date. Kobi: We're we're we're not but no we're not dating. LayTheDon: Y'all talking, y'all not together. They wasn't in a relationship. Kobi: Right. So he felt some type of way, like you said. He's not he wasn't mess he could have been mad, but and we're gonna say he felt some type of way. He felt some LayTheDon: Mm-hmm. Kobi: type of way and blocked her. He had that feeling. LayTheDon: Because she went on a date with somebody else and they not together? Kobi: Yeah. That that's his prerogative. LayTheDon: Sérgio? Deve ser daí beijo. GoFredo: Hey, boy, listen. Kobi: Hey, you should put it. GoFredo: BORN IN LayTheDon: That that's that's literally the definition of dating. You're allowed when you're dating, you are not tired. Unless y'all made it clear that y'all are monogamous with you each other, you are allowed Kobi: Actually. LayTheDon: to go and fuck other bitches. That means if you are dating and he she's and you don't she the same difference, you don't answer her because you was fucking some other bitch. And she asked you what she was doing, was you gonna straight up tell her, Yeah, I was fucking another shot. No, you gonna say, Nah, I was just chilling at home, but you're gonna make up some bullshit ass lie. And then she gonna feel the same way, but she might go a little crazy and she probably gonna block you, go fuck your best friend and some more shit. Like she just gonna go that that crazy. But it go both ways. If y'all is dating, she's allowed to go. You can't get mad and block her because y'all she's y'all dating. Y'all not together. Y'all not they wasn't in a relationship. That says Jesus ain't. Kobi: You got it. Like I said, I mean, blocking wouldn't I wouldn't necessarily call blocking sassy because women block dudes all the time. So would it would that would that LayTheDon: Women block dudes all the time. Men usually don't do the blocking. Kobi: would that count as a woman being sassy? Or LayTheDon: No, because that's what not that's what women do. Women care about lights and and and and and a ads and you know all that social media shit. Women will block regularly. That's stuff that women do. That's a that's something that the women community does. You don't hear a bunch of men just blocking motherfuckers because they made them act. That's that that's little sexy. GoFredo: Boy, I need a shot. Kevin: Yeah. LayTheDon: Yeah. Kobi: Redo, you you pissed GoFredo: I need a ship. Kobi: me off. I'm blocking you. I'm sassy. GoFredo: Hey man, look, I'm gonna get around to the nitty gritty of this conversation. LayTheDon: Let me ask you question. How many how many people have you blogged in your life, Kobe? Kobi: Not I could probably count on two hands. GoFredo: He said, so so six. Kevin: I I just I mean I just bought somebody LayTheDon: Set it. Kevin: for the first time ever. You know what I mean? Well not just. That was a couple years ago though. LayTheDon: Fredo, how often how how Fredo, how how many people have you wronged Kevin: That was one. LayTheDon: can you think of in your lifetime? GoFredo: I never blocked anybody. You get the hint from the get go. LayTheDon: Again, so of the three men on this podcast, one is one of three men are sassy. One of three men in every free group is sassy. That's why I heard that's just statistical. Kobi: That's crazy. That's crazy as hell said. That wow. That GoFredo: Hey, that's Cap. Kevin: typically GoFredo: That's crazy. Kevin: engage in no Kobi: rage. Kevin: blocking or nothing like that, you feel me? I I I I'll keep I'll keep it I'm gonna keep it a a butt. I blocked my baby mom cause she was all on my stuff, you know what I'm saying? And I was just like, no, I had to get I had to get her up out of there. You know what mean? That's the only person I blocked if I'm if I'm being honest with you. LayTheDon: Okay, that's different. That's different. That's different. Men men men block and unblock their baby mama. That's different. Y'all have an actual connection outside of y'all just being friends and shit. Kobi: I ain't never blocked my baby mama. LayTheDon: But you block six other people though. Two hands working people, my bad. GoFredo: Hey look, hey check this out. Hey check this out. Kobi: I'm protecting my peace. GoFredo: Hey check this out. I'm tired of this whole sassy nonsense, man. Man can't wear nothing. Man can't have an umbrella, can't run in the rain, can't sit at a bus stop, Kobi: Hey, wear rainbows. GoFredo: can't walk to the store, can't roll their ankle, can't go LayTheDon: Alright, now that's just bit extra. That's just bit extra. Kevin: You cook dinner, you sasky, bro. GoFredo: grocery shopping, can't get hurt, can't do nothing. Hey check this out. I've never blocked anybody because of the simple fact that a matter of is is that y'all know me. I'm upfront with what I say and how I do, how I move and whatnot. Now it has, I ain't get to tell you, you let it lay, but Kev know it has, it is a situation where somebody's getting really close to it because they keep reaching out, even not getting a hint about it. But I just keep ignoring it. So it is what it is or not necessarily ignoring it. It's just one of those days where Muz keeps sitting in long paragraphs and it's like, hey, First of all, even read long paragraphs. Like y'all notice, I don't even read long paragraphs. That's not even my forte. LayTheDon: We don't. We don't. We don't. Kobi: Definitely don't. GoFredo: So send in a long paragraph, you won't even get a response from me because what are you doing? Like that's not what we do. So that's that. Back to the topic ahead though. LayTheDon: Well is it I mean, I would I would consider that stalking. So then you have perfect right to to block. That's that's that's that's a good case. I would support I would support my GoFredo: No, I don't need to. You're gonna get the, I don't mind ignoring people. I think silence speak. LayTheDon: best friend and blocking that person. GoFredo: I think silence speaks more value than anything, more than anything and whatnot. the fact that you, excuse me, the fact that you're seeing your deliver still go through and no response and you basically talking to yourself, you pretty much got it. That don't really like irritate me as much. Now to my man situation, I'm agreeing with him. Now I don't block, but I'm agreeing with him. Hey, how do you be protecting, hey King, you watching this episode, protect your peace, K. Protect your peace, K. Don't let her stop you from being great. Shorty out here playing around. Granted, I'm with Lay. If you single and you're your business, y'all have heard me say this plenty of times. Go out and date everybody. I think it's good to go out and date and have your business and court other people and do what you gotta do until you find your special person. Bingo. But the lion, what you lying for Shorty, regardless of the situation, the reason I'm telling that king to protect his peace is because He felt something was off, which is why he blocked her. Something wasn't adding up and he blocked her. You can't say that man's sassy and you out here lying between your teeth. Now, regardless of you, now, no, LayTheDon: We would have did the same thing. GoFredo: but I'm saying regardless you saying, she, she did. LayTheDon: Regardl, no, ain't no regardless. Y'all would have done the same thing. You would have lied as well. If you was with another bitch, GoFredo: No! No! LayTheDon: you would have also lied to her and said you wasn't with a bitch. GoFredo: No, hey listen, my pops told me one thing, hey look, these soft ass niggas fucking up a real player as you hear me. I don't need to lie to you, shorty. I'm a first round draft pick. I'm coming into the, listen, I'm entering the draft number one. LayTheDon: This is all right, all right. Kevin: So so I'm I'm gonna keep it I'm gonna keep it a Kobi: Mm-hmm. Kevin: thousand. I'm gonna keep it a thousand with y'all real quick. In my in my day, you know what I'm saying? I've been in a roster situation, right? I didn't have to do that because I just kept up. No, LayTheDon: You was on a roster or you had a roster? Kevin: I had a roster. Who knows? Who who GoFredo: I think it was both. So you was... Kevin: who knows? I might have been on a roster. I might have been on a roster. Who knows? I probably was. I'm sure I was. But I'm saying as far as me, I never had that problem because I was more like, I must deal I just dealt with one at a time. I didn't have time for all that stress in my life, looking over my back like, you know what I'm saying, to see if you watching GoFredo: Come on. Kevin: who I'm texting or something like I never did that. It was one at a time. So I I probably moved through something quick, you know what I mean? And I you know, I who knows, I might even got a little bored with something and then just moved on, but that was probably their fault, not mine. You know what I mean? Kobi: Yeah. Kevin: You know what mean? GoFredo: Hey, hey, hey, hey. LayTheDon: That's crazy. Kevin: That was fine. That was like yeah, I hey listen, I I'm a good I you know, I would have a good time. Good time, great conversation, good vibe. I got bored, Kobi: Hey Fredo, what the girls be doing tonight, Hey. GoFredo: Hey, you hear me? KSAT clock it. Kevin: baby, and then you know, that's LayTheDon: Noted. Kevin: probably they thought, not mine, and then you know, boom, on to the next. But that's that was back then. GoFredo: Hey, hey, Kev, hey, Kev, if you go to the movies and... If you go to the movies and the movie's boring, are you leaving or you staying? Kevin: That's what I'm saying, like I'm out of there. I'm out of there. GoFredo: Thank you, all right, man, thank you, I'm with you. Kobi: Okay. Kevin: I'm out of there, man. GoFredo: Hey listen, I ain't gonna lie to you, I'm with Kev. Hey back in my prime, when I was early out here doing what I was doing and what not, I know for a fact I was, don't, LayTheDon: Don't you know? GoFredo: moms ain't got a lot of me. I know I'm on your roster. LayTheDon: Right. GoFredo: I know I'm on your roster, I know the difference. Kevin: That's what I'm saying. GoFredo: Look, I don't know if some people know, but let's keep it a buck. Some of us know when we on rosters and some of us know when we not. You know when you somebody's undivided attention and you kinda know when you not. No matter for the most part, it's some that know how to play a certain game and it's some that don't. You know, and they know how to play, they know how to text a certain way, know how to maneuver a certain way. My thing is that I don't think you need to lie. I think that do more harm than good. She could have just said, if he asked, hey, what you doing? She could have just said, I'm at the movies and the conversation. She could have just said, I'm out to dinner. LayTheDon: No, cause the nigga would have asked with who? The next question y'all would have asked was with who? GoFredo: Who is y'all? Enjoy yourself, shawty. I hope you have a good time. Hope you have a good time. Kevin: So I'm saying LayTheDon: He decided Kevin: it. LayTheDon: he do that she was detained seems like the type of nigga that would ask with who. Niggas is nosy. Niggas like the age, no. GoFredo: Now see, now that's a different type of dude because now I would say this, now ladies, if you texting a dude, if you talking or whatever, you dating like Lay said, and you go out to the movies or you go out to dinner, you going on a date. Now I feel like, you know, call a spade to spade, but it's ways around it. Just say, I'm out to dinner. And now buddy say with who and y'all just date, hey man, go ahead and move him to the side. Move him to the side. Only reason I say that because he not securing Kevin: Yeah. GoFredo: his own space with himself. Because if he was securing his space, all he gonna tell you is enjoy yourself, have a good time. Because that text, enjoy yourself, a good time, gonna carry you longer than you asking with who. Enjoy yourself, have a good time, because if she don't have a good time, who she gonna text? You? If dude blowing, who she gonna text? The guy that just said have a good time. how you doing? You still up? That's how you get the 2 a.m. as you up text. That's how you do it. Now, if you talking about some who you with, da da da da, come on, man. You think she finna, now she finna text the next dude. Now you done moved, now you done knocked down the list and whatnot because you just insecure at your place. That's just how I feel when it comes to the mix of it, to be honest with you. I don't think people need to lie. That's all I'm saying. I don't think people need to lie when it come to it. That's all I'm saying. I don't think you, it's, It's lying and then it's giving too much information. I don't think you need to give all that information to say you with your own girl, knowing you out with another nigga. That's all I'm saying. All you gotta do is say, I'm Kevin: All right. GoFredo: just out. Or you can say you out with your friend. LayTheDon: The question but so with this with this with this text message, this is why I need some extra context. Cause like we gonna analyze this text message and we if we're analyzing this text message, it could we don't know the actual conversation that went on because she could have just said GoFredo: Yeah, but yeah. LayTheDon: I went to the movies. As far as we know, she probably just said I went to the movies. For him to for her to GoFredo: What you say, Kea? LayTheDon: actually say the words with my homegirl, either A, he asked who you was with, and she said, My home girl. GoFredo: okay, I see what you're saying. Kevin: Mm. LayTheDon: Or B, she just said, I want my homegirl so that he wouldn't ask any other questions. And the fact that it was bothering him that much that she possibly not with her homegirl or she with somebody else that's not her homegirl, it bothered him and made him feel some type of way. And he GoFredo: Amen! LayTheDon: blocked her. That's why I said GoFredo: I don't mind him. LayTheDon: contact context makes sense in a conversation. She could have GoFredo: Yeah! LayTheDon: just said, like I said, she could have just been said, My homegirl is just not the hurtest feelings. Like. Because like some dudes can't handle like if I'm talking to a sortie and she tell me, she went out to go fuck with another nigga and then we're going on a like y'all gonna feel certain way, like if if I'm dating somebody and I go on a date with somebody on Monday and I go fuck the other nigga on Wednesday, we're dating. That's perfectly valid. Women will be okay with that, but let y'all find out that shorty just fucked a dude three to two days after you took on a date, that's gonna hurt y'all feelings. But that's dating. GoFredo: Hey, you want to be honest with you? LayTheDon: That's literally how that's dating. GoFredo: You want me to keep the bug with you, how I move and operate? Hey fellas, check this out. I mean, and then, you know, some dudes got it and some dudes don't. And when you got it, y'all gonna know what I'm talking about. I ain't gonna lie with me. I ain't trusting none of them. And from the start to the finish, I ain't gonna lie to you. I ain't really trusting none of them and whatnot. I'm gonna think you out here, I'm gonna think you out here, windowing and dillling anyway, you hear me? So in my mind, and I don't mean I'm stepping out, that just means that's just how I feel how you moving until we get a certain type of weight. And like you said, once we become together and we like, we decide like, all right, we're gonna decide to do this and make this work and whatever the case like that may be. And we feel like damn, that's a different story and everything like that. But if we just dating, no, I'm not questioning you until I decide to wanna take you for real. and whatnot, and then that's when we're gonna decide to go from there. But I agree with you. I don't think it's nothing wrong, but I just don't think that that information is needed. That's my part, that's just me. I don't think that information is And if dude, if searching for all that information and doing all that, you know, I ain't trying to say my man is insecure, but at the end of the day, I tell that lady to, you know, take a step back from Buddy and let him get more secure in his space. I don't think Buddy should be out there dating if he can't, you know, because he ain't found himself yet. if he can't be comfortable in his own skin. Something like that shouldn't irritate you. You should know your worth, basically. I'm with you. I don't think you need to lie to him. I just wanna make sure LayTheDon: I'm just saying, like, from from just from that context alone, Kevin: Yeah, I'm yeah. GoFredo: I don't think she needs a ladder. LayTheDon: like I said, you gotta we gotta we gotta know the background and we gotta learn know the the women and female thinking. And that's one thing with GoFredo: Facts. LayTheDon: opposite sex friendships. Like sometimes you're gonna search for questions and answers from your opposite sex friend that you expecting to hear, but when you they hit you with some shit that you aren't trying to hear, that's when it becomes toxic. Cause like I didn't act, I didn't call you as my male best friend. For answers that I didn't want to hear. I called you as my male best friend for answers I wanna fucking hear. And you tried to give me some bullshit. Yeah, no, yeah, it's gonna get toxic real quick. Cause that's not what I balled you for. GoFredo: talking about. Matter of, hey, hey, hey, matter of fact, Bumba let's Kev call him. Let's let him call him. Put it on his mind. Send out a link. Send out a link. Hey, Kevin: Call call in right now. GoFredo: hey, do like they do on Dateline when they ain't trying to show their face. Send out a link and tell them to put the black screen out. Just hear a voice. Do the voice audio change. Kevin: Yeah. Yo call remember remember remember GoFredo: Hey! Kevin: where what was the show bro the remember when Kobi: But on a voice changes. Kevin: the cheaters van used to pull up and used to hear him talking? GoFredo: you... LayTheDon: yeah. Bro. GoFredo: when they had the dark face and changed, hoped that everybody had a deep Kevin: Yeah. GoFredo: voice, even the ladies. Kevin: Yeah. LayTheDon: You're up. Kevin: there. GoFredo: Hey, hey, no, I ain't gonna lie to you, Lay. I just think I'm with you. I just think, I don't know. Y'all know me, I'm different. Well, all four of us kind of think the same way when it comes to this. Like, we let our homies and people we like, and people we deal with live in their truth, no matter what the situation is. I think that's when things get iffy and whatnot when it comes to not just relationships, but even like with your homies. in the same situation. I think some people just can't handle the truth and won't not. A lot of these people want yes men and women. And that's just really what it come down to. I know me and Layda had a few conversations, like, nah, I ain't like that response. I'm like, what you want me to tell you? I ain't gonna tell you no fake stuff. I ain't gonna tell you what you want to hear. LayTheDon: Because all right, so here's the thing. I you know, I got I got that mindset, you know, of of of man sometimes. So normally when I'm calling Fredo or I'm texting Fredo about a situation or a subject, I'm not asking for advice. I'm asking for confirmation that I'm not fucking GoFredo: You LayTheDon: crazy. I'm confirming that I wasn't the only person thinking the same thing. Now it's very rare that I call or text Fredo and it's it's It's it's a different thought than what I was already thinking. Like I said, it's literally just confirmation. I don't think I've ever necessarily asked Fredo specifically for advice or something. Now I have GoFredo: It's been a long time. LayTheDon: asked him. Now I have asked him, like when a man says this or a man does this, does that just questioning like, does that mean something or am I tripping? But again, that's more so me asking for confirmation that I'm not tripping. GoFredo: Yeah, cause I'm not, I'm not finna, I know some people be like lying to they people and whatnot. I'm not gonna cap to you and tell you like you trippin' the tweakin'. Like if you, you know, I feel like if you right you right you wrong you wrong Kobi: Mm-hmm. GoFredo: at the end of the day. Now what I do do, pause, that's what he is, I'm a kid. But what I do in that situation is like I would tell Lay like I'm with you, you not tweakin' but. da da da da da da, like give her contacts from the other party or whatever the situation is. That's been happening for them since college, honestly, that we are having these conversations. But yeah, I agree with you. And from a vice standpoint, it's been years. Usually, she'll just be like, hey, am I tweaking? And then it'd be like either yay or nay. It really wouldn't be that yay or nay. LayTheDon: If it's if it's I think if it's ever something you like partially agree with, you kind of give me what the male perspective of that situation is. And then you kind of give me like a option of what would be the better option of the two. And like I said, it's not necessarily necessarily advice because most likely one of those options I already thought about. But me GoFredo: yeah. LayTheDon: being an overthinker, I thought about something to go around that option if that was like an option I didn't like. GoFredo: true because ay y'all with her sometimes she called it she act like she ain't toxic sometimes I say pride because she don't like to say toxic her pride to get into the way and whatnot and then so it'd be one of those things where I'd be like you not tweaking but at the same time it's better that you do X Y and Z to just move past it and just kind of go from there it's not that you tweak it but I do tell her like you not tweaking but I can see where you messed up You ain't tweaking, but I see where you messed up. Well, I see where, you know, things shifted and whatnot. I keep it a buck. I keep it a buck though. That's just me. But we all like that. Every time we all have conversations, it's been like that. No matter what the situation is. I feel like none of us lie to each other. I respect that more than anything. The friend groups they got, you know, the people that lie to them is crazy. Your own homie lying to you is crazy. That's crazy. That's crazy. Kevin: Yeah, LayTheDon: That's that. Like, goddamn. GoFredo: That's crazy. I don't never want that. Kevin: But you know, sometimes sometimes, you know, they hit you with some nonsense and then you gotta just gotta give them the unknown advice and you know. The day gotta end at some point. They LayTheDon: Mm. Kevin: hit you with some nonsense. You be like, you know, GoFredo: ain't, it ain't. LayTheDon: Okay, opposite your your opp your opposite sex, female, best friend, homegirl, that you're an A1, day one female shortage that's not your girlfriend, that you ain't smashed. Or don't want to smash. GoFredo: See, I think your best friend, your homegirl Kobi: She like her sister. GoFredo: that's your best friend or at that top tier is different from just a homegirl. Like I think that's different. I think a homegirl LayTheDon: What's the nuts? GoFredo: could just be, yeah, just a homie or just a friend and whatnot. I'm just saying what is, LayTheDon: What's the difference? GoFredo: that y'all ain't trying to smash. Y'all just, you know y'all, y'all know each other lane. LayTheDon: So your female best friend and your home girl. Kobi: Whoa, Fredo, that's all you. Wow. GoFredo: Mm-hmm. LayTheDon: The difference is one you trying to smash and one you're not trying to smash. GoFredo: No, saying, I did not say that. I said, I said. LayTheDon: So what's the di what's the difference between your homegirl and female best friend? GoFredo: The difference between if it's just the homegirl as in your friend, that just mean y'all just friends. Your best friend is levels to it. Y'all didn't kind of Kobi: Okay, so Alfredo, what is hello, hello, wait, wait, wait, wait. GoFredo: went through a war together. You trust this individual. Like that's what I'm saying. Like y'all didn't kind of, y'all. LayTheDon: So you so you wouldn't you wouldn't talk you wouldn't get advice from your homegirl. You'd get ad advice from your female best friend, correct? GoFredo: No, I didn't ask like just regular homegirls for advice on the situations. I already knew, but I was just like, know, hey, da-da-da, this happening, you know, just shooting the shit, just woo woo woo. We talking about it and they give me their advice or whatever the situation like that may be. Like if I'm like at work and I got like homegirls that I work with and we cool and we just kind of shooting the shit in conversation. and they give me their advice on like whatever the situation or dilemma I'm in. Yeah, you know, I'm on him. But if they don't know the game or what they saying is going through, and like, especially if I know their situation, like, hey Shorty, how you gonna try to tell me? LayTheDon: Why don't why why would you get advice for somebody that don't know the game is my question. That's what that's what like when we mean when I say toxic relationships, toxic seven, we talk about girls that are close to you. We talking about girls or opposite sex friends that are close to you that you talk to every day. You randomly call them on a Wednesday on some bo like shit like that. Not like a regular ass home girl that you work with. We we talking about Kobi: A close woman to me. LayTheDon: close female or male friends that you close to. Not somebody you just met at work a w a year ago, bro. GoFredo: It's sometimes be that nice a year ago a year long time first of all, I go like to you a long time because right Now if I LayTheDon: A couple of months ago. A couple of months, my bad food. GoFredo: look up if it's a couple months ago, ain't talking to you. You ain't you ain't gonna know my story like that You're even you ain't gonna get put in this chapter now if we it got to be at least a year some change that we didn't talk that we didn't know each other and I ain't saying that the vice was warranted I'm saying like in conversation And I'm like, da da da da da da da. And you know, I was talking with this one shorty, da da this happened. woo woo. You know, didn't they give me their advice on the situation? I ain't saying I listen, or it was good advice. I'm just saying it's be like, in conversation. Now you saying like, call and be like, hey. Like, that's like me calling you like, hey, hey. I've been talking to this one girl and she doing da da da da da da. Now that's different. I see that's what you said. I'm just saying like, in the floor of a conversation and then they just throw some advice out there. That Kobi: They're talking about both GoFredo: don't mean it's good, they just probably give me their female perspective on LayTheDon: Yeah, no, I'm trying to I'm trying to close it. GoFredo: it. You say what? LayTheDon: I said, nah, I'm talking about close like wasn't kidding. Is is that girl that texted you, is that your home girl that's like one of your like close best friends? Kevin: That's my homegirl, but like we know each other for like a long time, like 10 plus. You know what I mean? So like LayTheDon: So you you wouldn't consider you wouldn't consider her home your best friend as like just as a title or? Kevin: No, no, no. It's not. It's like we we we always been cool, you know what I'm saying? But it's not like like I'm inviting her to like my kids birthday party type situation, you know what I mean? Not to say she can't come, but it's like you know what I'm saying? Not to say she can't go, but it's like it's one of those things where like, okay, I'll invite to the cookout, but not my daughter's birthday party. You know what I'm saying? That type of that type of situation, if that makes sense. I would it it's like it's it's levels GoFredo: It's levels. Kevin: it's levels to it. It's levels to it. You know what I mean? Like certain like and I'm not saying GoFredo: She know this. She playing. LayTheDon: No good y'all have because like maybe I'm just I'm just strict Kevin: But it's like this. Okay, that point right there though, right? LayTheDon: on my front line. I don't know. maybe I'm just very strict on my front line or how I I view what's considered Fred the best friends and homegirls homies because like it gotta be because like like for example Fredo Kevin: I think men different though. I think men different. 'Cause like that point I just made GoFredo: Yeah. LayTheDon: Fredo I would consider as my best friend he's also the homie. but I would probably invite him to any of my friends shit type shit, because nine times out of ten that's probably gonna be the godfather anyway. But like not saying I wouldn't invite Kobe or Kev, but like me and Kobe and Kev haven't grown that close to where I'm inviting you to like personal bullshit. But I'd be but I'm cool enough to d to go on like Vegas trips with y'all. Does that make sense? Like like if y'all say let's go on Kevin: Right, right. Yeah, right, exactly, exactly, exactly. LayTheDon: a friend group, friend group trip, yeah we all there. But if I'm if it's on some personal shit, I'd call Fredo, but like Y'all are the homies. Y'all y'all y'all all the homies. If I consider you a homie, no offense. I'm not trying to smash. I don't want to smash. I don't have a desire to smash. But GoFredo: That's because it's levels to things, that's why. But like at the same time, I think what it is is like Kair said, I think men and women is different. Like that friend group is a little bit different. I think it is. Because for like a woman, a male friend group is a little bit hard, especially if you got a significant other. That's a little bit more of a rocky, because you can't have too many guy friends. That's not looking too good on a resume if Kevin: Yeah, yeah, right, right, right, right. GoFredo: you walking in with crazy guy friends. Kobe. Hey, y'all. Hey, y'all. Kobe LayTheDon: we go, we good now. Up. Kevin: there we go. GoFredo: got Metro PCS. We sorry, y'all. He got Metro PCS. That's what happened. What did say? Kevin: Okay. GoFredo: I don't know, I just work here. There you go. Kevin: Yeah. LayTheDon: Cut it out, cut it out. GoFredo: He got the, he went and got the Walmart wifi for $20. That's all it is, y'all. We bad. That's our fault. thing. LayTheDon: That's wow. GoFredo: But I think, I do think it's levels to it though. I think it's only levels, but it's also, I think it's just one of those things where it's different for men and women. I just think it is. It's not really, I don't know, this may sound crazy, but I think it is bad for, not bad. but I just think it's frowned upon if a woman has a slew of, excuse me, guy friends, and it's not as bad if a man got a slew of girl that's friends. Kevin: Yes and no. Yes and no. Yes and no. GoFredo: depending on who the woman is. think. LayTheDon: And I wouldn't say that. Like, I would yes, GoFredo: But I'm saying- LayTheDon: yeah. I'm gonna say, like, if if you have if I have a bunch, if a female has a bunch of guy friends, but she don't like hang out with them, like most of them is probably like motherfuckers that she just texts regularly, they all send a bunch of memes. Y'all probably see each other at once every few fuck months or years. That's one thing. But when if you got females that constantly hit your phone and y'all gotten close enough to where like they're telling you they're intimate parts of their life. Then that's when it gets different. Cause it's like, even as your best friend, your male friend, especially if you got a significant other, there's certain parts of your life or certain parts of your intimate life that your best friends or homegirls or homies shouldn't shouldn't know about. Like it if y'all are Kevin: Yeah. GoFredo: Yeah! LayTheDon: just friends, like there's nothing more but just friends, there's some shit you shouldn't know. There's some shit you probably should have never seen about them in their lifetime. And the problem GoFredo: I agree. LayTheDon: is opposite sexes sometimes, if if if it ever gets that close for you've seen or known. That much about it. If y'all not friends, y'all just secretly wait on the sideline to smash. Y'all just wait for the perfect opportunity. Kevin: Mm-hmm. But it it's it's different though. GoFredo: But that's what I'm saying. Kevin: You Yeah, it it's GoFredo: I'll ahead, Keir. Kevin: messy. It's I was gonna say it's it's it's messy in that one way because I I'ma say I'm gonna say so I actually matter of fact I experienced this actually. Like it wasn't say it was like a bunch, but like dating somebody who had who had you know male friends, I was cool with it because I know I have female friends and ain't nothing, you know, happening with them. You know what I mean? So I was I was cool with that. but when I came around, one in particular, now I didn't know him, but this is just from the energy, the energy I got from her. She's basically like, you know, he like he don't he don't hit me up no more. He don't like he don't like he ain't say happy birthday, nothing, and like talks to like other people in her, you know what I'm saying, in her friend group. And I'm like, okay, so obviously he feeling some type of way because I'm here. So you know what that means. You know what I mean? And GoFredo: Yeah. Yeah. Kevin: that's how you're gonna know with especially like when a when a girl has male friends. Now I'm not saying it doesn't happen with female friends because there could be there could be women that are around you that are like that, but they just more they just more low key with it. You know what I'm saying? That they that they interested than than men are. If that you know you know what I'm saying? GoFredo: I just, you want to be honest with you, I agree with you, Kev, LayTheDon: Yeah. GoFredo: and I get what you saying, like, with me, just think that I'm not, like I said, I'm not saying it's right or wrong or anything. I just think that a lot, it's, I don't want to say it's a security issue or not. I just think that for a lot of men, it just looked crazy. And like you said, like Kev said, it's not texting every day, well, both of y'all said it's not texting every day, anything like that. I just think it looks a little bit more crazy because As a man I know, if you as a woman and you got five guy friends in that show, homie, as a guy I know, they ain't got three to two out of the five trying to Nah, as a, and LayTheDon: Two of that. GoFredo: you said how many? LayTheDon: Two out of five. GoFredo: Two or three, that's what I said, she just wanna debate. But you got it, I just agree, just agree. Two out of the five, she just wanna debate. I'm just gonna get into it, she got it. Two and a half out of the five, there you go, wanna smash. But when it comes to female friends, it could be a slew of different things. They could just have him as a friend because he's a protector. He's somebody that they feel comfortable being around and so many other things, not necessarily a sexual trait because remember it's a video that we was trying to get on here, but it was some issues and we're gonna try to see if we can repost it on our Instagram page so y'all can see it. But the video we was talking about where old girl was like, we've been friends for 10 years and I don't wanna ruin the friendship by us dating. And dude like, I mean, we might could be able to do something. You what I mean? You saw his heart, leave his body live. Kevin: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. GoFredo: Why, why? Kevin: But that was the one that was when she said though, she said, Well he does check off all the boxes. That's how I was kinda like, huh? Like what are you talking about right now? GoFredo: He checked all the boxes. LayTheDon: be honest, I I I saw both sides of this and Can't wait till we do the the I will I would prefer to say this in the reaction video, but I saw two sides of the my first side is as a man, like if a man wants something, they usually go for what they want. And for GoFredo: huh. LayTheDon: them to go that long 10 years and you felt this way about this woman for 10 years, and you never made the move to try to make something happen, you never attempted propose you like her saying, you know, I think we'll just we we're better on first friends. That was her nudging him to like, yo, you if you feel this way, then maybe bust move because most men ain't gonna accept a woman proposing to them. That's that's that's for some reason that's a little little soft. So I think it was more so like sh she put it that way, cause like it's been 10 years. He ain't made a move yet, he ain't tried, he ain't like you're just now waiting to this GoFredo: Thank you. LayTheDon: little question podcast to say something. And at this point, it's just like, all right, like, bro, bust a move. Like I'm not finna GoFredo: I'm gonna show that. LayTheDon: If if I gotta cause if if if she feels like as a woman she gotta make that move to make something happen, then she's the leader in that situation. She that's he's not a protector, he not a man that's trying to lead. So she don't want that in a man. If he ain't trying to lead, he ain't making that move. Like you telling me for 10 years you felt this way and you ain't saying shit. GoFredo: I agree, I agree. Cause it go back to what K.O said on the first episode and he also elaborated even more on the second episode when we was doing this is that, know, men need to lead and be more intentional with their decisions as they move. Like he kind of put, I'm with you on that. He put himself in the friend zone and it's nothing that you can do. So it's one of those things where I definitely like seeing from your perspective. And then it's like, it's like, and it's also like what Kev said that she said, like, he checked, not that I'm thinking about it, I ain't gonna lie Kev, I'm agreeing with Lay now, cause I didn't even think of that, for her to even say like, he checked all the boxes, but I don't want to ruin the friendship. So to me it's like, buddy, I know she didn't gave you signals throughout the 10 years. I know she had, I know, I know she gave you signals. LayTheDon: Ten years, bro. You tell me she ain't mentioned that one time. GoFredo: She gave him signals, like come on, hey, hey. Kevin, Kobe, come on now. It don't need, if y'all talking to a female, it don't need to take y'all 10 years for y'all to figure out if Shorty like you and she going. It don't, Kevin: No, no, no. GoFredo: 10 years is crazy. You can't be better, believe me, if not to see the hints. Yeah, 10 years is crazy. You know what's LayTheDon: Right. So GoFredo: crazy? I didn't even think of that until you said that, because I was just so looking at his heart, Lee, his body, that I didn't even, because you could just see the devastation on his face when the dude was like, what are you Kevin: yeah, you could. GoFredo: thinking? He was just like, I mean, someday we can make it happen. LayTheDon: You don't realize now like if if he was to propose now after that video, it would be meaningless. Cause you you'd be doing it just cause you got put on blast about doing it. You d you doing it now is not even as meaningful. So it's kinda like a turnoff at that point, cause like I had to go on a podcast GoFredo: But dear. LayTheDon: and say this publicly for you to do to make a move. Like it's over with. GoFredo: But then how do you, but then at the same time, you can't wait though, because if you wait, it only makes it worse by waiting even longer. Like he the day now put himself in a pit. Kevin: Yeah. GoFredo: He didn't even do anything. LayTheDon: The only way he could have the only way to fix that situation, he would have had to pop and pop that question right there at the question. Like he had at and fake it like a surprise, like this is why we get an interview right now. That was the only way to fix that. There's no coming back from that, bruh. Like mental GoFredo: real late. Yeah, he ain't think fast enough. LayTheDon: mental mentally from a female perspective, there is no coming back from that. You try to propose from here on out, it's it's it like it it GoFredo: Well, LayTheDon: don't work. GoFredo: he gotta ask her to be the girlfriend first. He ain't even got over that hump. LayTheDon: Yeah. GoFredo: He ain't even got that yet. I just felt bad for the man. I'm with you. Kevin: Like GoFredo: just felt, cause just seeing it live hurt my heart. Just seeing it live hurt my heart for him. Just seeing her say that he checked all the boxes. And then it's like Kev said, seeing her say because I ain't gonna lie to you, if I put myself in his shoes, I have never been in that situation. But if I put myself in his shoes and I'm sitting there thinking, and then like you said, and that video went somewhat viral, yeah, that'd hurt my heart. That'd hurt, because everybody, if Kevin: Okay. GoFredo: we seen it, old, everybody, all his people seen it. So you know, like his communities, his community Kevin: Yeah, yeah. That's correct. GoFredo: seen it. Kevin: Yeah, yeah, that's you know what? But that's I I'm gonna say this that that takes me into another topic. And I think I think we at that point, I think we're gonna have to close this out because what I'm gonna ask y'all is can these friendships between men and women stay strictly platonic?