Latest / ok storytime / My boyfriend UNINVITED me from a hangout… because he hated my outfit! -r/AITAH | Reddit Stories | EP3105

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My boyfriend UNINVITED me from a hangout… because he hated my outfit! -r/AITAH | Reddit Stories | EP3105 · ok storytime

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Hey, this is Angie.
• 0:01
  Speaker 2: And this is Keon, your favorite OK Storytime host, and
• 0:03
  Speaker 2: we've got great stories coming right up.
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: But before that, we have a quick two-minute break from
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: the sponsors that keep this show alive.
• 0:11
  Speaker 3: My boyfriend uninvited me for my hangout because he hated
• 0:14
  Speaker 3: my outfit. What's wrong with my outfit? So I've, 25 female,
• 0:17
  Speaker 3: been with my boyfriend, 25 male... for a little over
• 0:20
  Speaker 3: four years now. For some context, we work at the
• 0:22
  Speaker 3: same company, but recently got made redundant, so I started
• 0:26
  Speaker 3: working at a bar. I worked there previously, so it's
• 0:29
  Speaker 3: been nice to go back, but my boyfriend has been unemployed. Yesterday,
• 0:32
  Speaker 3: we went out with some old colleagues from the company
• 0:34
  Speaker 3: we made redundant from as ketchup. It was around 90
• 0:37
  Speaker 3: degrees Fahrenheit, so very hot, and I chose a flowing
• 0:41
  Speaker 3: skirt and black tank top with a green sort of
• 0:44
  Speaker 3: splash design on it. My auntie gifted me this top
• 0:47
  Speaker 3: ages ago. My boyfriend chose a thick black woven jumper
• 0:51
  Speaker 3: and black jeans to wear. So when he saw my outfit,
• 0:54
  Speaker 3: the first thing he said was, you aren't seriously wearing that.
• 0:57
  Speaker 3: Come on, that is indoor clothing. I said I was
• 1:01
  Speaker 3: happy with my outfit and that I regularly wear these
• 1:04
  Speaker 3: items outdoors. Then he made a disgusted face and said,
• 1:07
  Speaker 3: we are going to a fancy area in my city.
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  Speaker 3: You can't go like that if you look awful. I
• 1:13
  Speaker 3: decided I was immediately offended by this because I thought
• 1:17
  Speaker 3: my outfit looked nice, and I had spent time picking
• 1:20
  Speaker 3: it out. By the way, this comes from Twangara, and
• 1:23
  Speaker 3: if you want to submit your own stories, go to
• 1:24
  Speaker 3: the r slash ok story time subreddit. I'm Riley.
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: I'm Sophia.
• 1:28
  Speaker 2: I'm Keon.
• 1:28
  Speaker 3: And we're going to read this goofily. If you have
• 1:30
  Speaker 3: anything you'd like to add, please add it down below.
• 1:32
  Speaker 3: I asked him to stop commenting on my outfit, and
• 1:35
  Speaker 3: we left the house. But But on the way there,
• 1:37
  Speaker 3: he wouldn't stop making rude comments and remarks. The one
• 1:40
  Speaker 3: I found most offensive was he said the green pattern
• 1:43
  Speaker 3: on my top looked like someone had vomited on me.
• 1:46
  Speaker 3: This was so demoralizing, and I was in a bad
• 1:50
  Speaker 3: mood by the time we met with our coworkers, and
• 1:53
  Speaker 3: I had to shake it off. On the trade ride home,
• 1:56
  Speaker 3: he was also wasted and made a comment saying I
• 1:59
  Speaker 3: was very beautiful, but I knew it would make some
• 2:03
  Speaker 3: sort of backhanded compliment and thought He would mention my
• 2:07
  Speaker 3: outfit again. However, he started saying how I'm so talented
• 2:10
  Speaker 3: and he doesn't understand why I'm wasting myself and my
• 2:14
  Speaker 3: potential working at a bar. I said that we were
• 2:16
  Speaker 3: just got made redundant and that I enjoyed working there.
• 2:19
  Speaker 3: He was trying to say I'm wasting my life and
• 2:21
  Speaker 3: talking about the bar I work at as though it's
• 2:25
  Speaker 3: like so rubbish and I'm letting myself down by not
• 2:28
  Speaker 3: striving for more. So my problem with this is he
• 2:31
  Speaker 3: was saying it quite loudly and many people on the
• 2:34
  Speaker 3: train could hear him. And we're looking, and although at
• 2:37
  Speaker 3: first glance it potentially sounds like maybe a caring, concerned partner,
• 2:41
  Speaker 3: I think actually underlying in it was almost like he
• 2:45
  Speaker 3: was trying to put me down.
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: Well, I mean, yeah, he's been putting you down all night.
• 2:49
  Speaker 3: And trying to humiliate me publicly for working in hospitality.
• 2:52
  Speaker 3: And a lady from the train eventually spoke up and
• 2:54
  Speaker 3: told him, if I'm happy, that should be all that matters.
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  Speaker 1: Oh, you know it's bad if someone spoke up.
• 3:01
  Speaker 2: A random stranger.
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: A random stranger had to speak up. Oh, you know
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: he was being loud and aggressive.
• 3:08
  Speaker 3: I was so grateful to hear that I was getting
• 3:11
  Speaker 3: very embarrassed and worried that everyone on the train probably
• 3:15
  Speaker 3: by that point thought I was a loser. These events
• 3:18
  Speaker 3: were uncomfortable for me. Going back to the clothing thing quickly. Now,
• 3:21
  Speaker 3: this is not the first time he's done something like this.
• 3:24
  Speaker 3: Last year, we jointly planned a cute double date with
• 3:27
  Speaker 3: this friend. Just go into the city and get some food.
• 3:30
  Speaker 3: and watch football, etc. It was a casual outing, and
• 3:33
  Speaker 3: I chose my outfit, which was a white shirt with
• 3:35
  Speaker 3: the printed hippo artwork on the front, and my dark
• 3:38
  Speaker 3: green pants, which have some flowers on it, and things.
• 3:41
  Speaker 3: He saw my outfit and demanded I change, saying I
• 3:44
  Speaker 3: looked horrible again. And in the end, he said I
• 3:47
  Speaker 3: was uninvited, and he went on his own and made
• 3:51
  Speaker 3: excuses to his friends for my absence. I think this
• 3:55
  Speaker 3: was also rude, as the outfit was not outrageous, and...
• 4:00
  Speaker 3: It was also casual hangout.
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: It was a casual hangout?
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  Speaker 4: He said, oh.
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: I think Opie's just got like a whimsical sense of
• 4:08
  Speaker 2: fashion and he just can't accept it.
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  Speaker 1: Unless you're at someone's wedding and you're wearing a paper
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  Speaker 1: bag on your head, he should be quiet about your
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: freaking outfits.
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  Speaker 3: I've worn this outfit out to other places and people
• 4:19
  Speaker 3: often compliment the pieces asking where I got them.
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: I want to know where you got them.
• 4:23
  Speaker 3: So today I spoke to him about his behavior and
• 4:26
  Speaker 3: said I wasn't comfortable with him being unkind And speaking
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  Speaker 3: this way about me. And what I chose to wear.
• 4:31
  Speaker 3: I said it's my body. And he doesn't have any
• 4:34
  Speaker 3: right to treat me that way. Because of what I
• 4:37
  Speaker 3: chose to wear. He said that's ridiculous. And he doesn't see...
• 4:41
  Speaker 3: why I should be allowed to wear horrible outfits to
• 4:44
  Speaker 3: his things, he's planned.
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  Speaker 2: Allowed.
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: Keyword allowed.
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  Speaker 3: He said he should be able to comment as much
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  Speaker 3: as he likes because he doesn't feel like his point
• 4:55
  Speaker 3: is getting across as clearly. I refused to change. I
• 4:58
  Speaker 3: told him after being told to stop following his first comment,
• 5:02
  Speaker 3: he should have stopped. He tried to argue more about it,
• 5:04
  Speaker 3: but I was getting very frustrated. So I said I
• 5:08
  Speaker 3: needed to go to bed and that he can just
• 5:11
  Speaker 3: not invite me to any of his hangouts if he
• 5:13
  Speaker 3: thinks my fashion sense is so embarrassing. Now he wants
• 5:18
  Speaker 3: to talk about it again tomorrow, no doubt to try
• 5:21
  Speaker 3: and strong arm me into agreeing to his perspective. Previously,
• 5:25
  Speaker 3: I saw things like this as smaller issues and not
• 5:28
  Speaker 3: a reason to break up. But as I'm getting older,
• 5:31
  Speaker 3: I'm finding it very hard to imagine being with someone
• 5:34
  Speaker 3: who essentially is trying to break me down like Every
• 5:36
  Speaker 3: opportunity they get. Like, I didn't think this outfit was
• 5:39
  Speaker 3: the right choice for yesterday. But instead, all I said
• 5:42
  Speaker 3: to him was, that jumper is very thick. Won't you
• 5:45
  Speaker 3: be hot in this weather? And when he responded saying
• 5:48
  Speaker 3: he was fine, I left it at that. Like, maybe
• 5:51
  Speaker 3: he's embarrassed by me. But even then, that's no reason
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  Speaker 3: to talk to someone the way he spoke to me.
• 5:56
  Speaker 3: And he should have stopped when I asked him to
• 5:59
  Speaker 3: stop the first time. So, this is where I'm wondering,
• 6:02
  Speaker 3: would I be the a-hole? Because since... being redundant he
• 6:05
  Speaker 3: hasn't been able to pay rent we were made redundant
• 6:08
  Speaker 3: at the beginning of may he's staying in my family's
• 6:10
  Speaker 3: home so it's me and my mom here my mom
• 6:13
  Speaker 3: said the only reason she's letting him stay is because
• 6:16
  Speaker 3: of our relationship which makes sense how long ago was
• 6:19
  Speaker 3: may your mom looked.
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: At you and said by the way the only reason
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: that he's staying in my house is because he's dating
• 6:26
  Speaker 1: you dating him he's gone.
• 6:31
  Speaker 3: He said he'd probably be able to pay half of
• 6:33
  Speaker 3: the rent by now but he still hasn't found a
• 6:35
  Speaker 3: job so has no money at all he also has
• 6:38
  Speaker 3: been quite sad about being made redundant so i'm not
• 6:41
  Speaker 3: sure he's been putting much effort into looking for a
• 6:44
  Speaker 3: new position until very recently this week his parents won't
• 6:48
  Speaker 3: send him any money either and if he left here
• 6:51
  Speaker 3: i assume he'd have to go back to live with
• 6:54
  Speaker 3: his mom who lives around a two-hour drive away. I
• 6:57
  Speaker 3: know a lot of these guys. Schmads, how do you
• 6:59
  Speaker 3: know these people? I have no unemployed friends. I don't
• 7:02
  Speaker 3: know anyone that's unemployed. I don't think you can be
• 7:04
  Speaker 3: unemployed anymore.
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: Well, you can, I mean, like, especially our age, I
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: feel like some people in the transition have been unemployed.
• 7:11
  Speaker 3: I was thinking I could just tell him we can't
• 7:13
  Speaker 3: afford to keep him without paying rent anymore. And that
• 7:16
  Speaker 3: he has to move out at the end of the
• 7:18
  Speaker 3: month and we wouldn't be together anymore. Is that wrong
• 7:21
  Speaker 3: to do? I just feel like it's the easiest way
• 7:23
  Speaker 3: to be free of his bad energy and kind of
• 7:26
  Speaker 3: guarantees he will be away from me. Please, hopefully this
• 7:28
  Speaker 3: guy's out of there. I don't think it should be like, oh,
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  Speaker 3: you can't pay so we can't be together. We can't
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  Speaker 3: be together because you're disrespectful.
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's it. That's it.
• 7:35
  Speaker 3: And that's the end of this story. We're going to
• 7:36
  Speaker 3: read the next one.
• 7:38
  Speaker 5: I agreed to keep my ex's cat for a few days,
• 7:41
  Speaker 5: and she kept moving the date. Maybe it's your cat now. I,
• 7:45
  Speaker 5: 27 male, broke up with my ex, 36 female, around
• 7:49
  Speaker 5: one month ago. We were together for about a year
• 7:52
  Speaker 5: and a half, and we lived together in my apartment.
• 7:54
  Speaker 5: She's had her own during the entirety of the relationship,
• 7:57
  Speaker 5: and last weekend as of writing this, I had her
• 8:00
  Speaker 5: move her things back to her place. and my apartment
• 8:03
  Speaker 5: is no longer a residence for her, not even temporary.
• 8:06
  Speaker 5: I was initially adamant that all of her things would
• 8:09
  Speaker 5: be moved out, including her cat. She has one, I
• 8:12
  Speaker 5: have two, and they all get along, but they're not
• 8:14
  Speaker 5: best friends. After the final boxes and bags were moved
• 8:18
  Speaker 5: into her apartment, she wanted me to keep the cat
• 8:20
  Speaker 5: for the time being, as she wanted to have some
• 8:22
  Speaker 5: time to unpack her belongings and not have the cat
• 8:25
  Speaker 5: live among a bunch of moving boxes. I reluctantly agreed
• 8:28
  Speaker 5: and asked about a time frame for when the cat
• 8:30
  Speaker 5: can move back to hers, and we agreed next Friday evening,
• 8:33
  Speaker 5: which is today, in a couple of hours. The cat,
• 8:36
  Speaker 5: 16 years old, ex has had him since kitten age,
• 8:40
  Speaker 5: has a certain personality where he's very vocal. Vocal Fry
• 8:44
  Speaker 5: screams as soon as he's wanting to cuddle and you
• 8:46
  Speaker 5: move a muscle ever so slightly. He wants to be
• 8:49
  Speaker 5: close and in your face all the time. which is
• 8:51
  Speaker 5: something I have an issue with. I don't mind having
• 8:53
  Speaker 5: a cuddle with the cats, but with all of his
• 8:54
  Speaker 5: traits considered, this is having a negative effect on me.
• 8:57
  Speaker 5: By the way, this comes from Grazdor. If you want
• 9:00
  Speaker 5: to submit your own stories, go to our subreddit.
• 9:02
  Speaker 4: I'm Dakota.
• 9:03
  Speaker 3: I'm Riley.
• 9:04
  Speaker 5: We're going to read this story about this man that
• 9:05
  Speaker 5: hates cuddly cats. You're going to have your thoughts about
• 9:08
  Speaker 5: it and we're going.
• 9:09
  Speaker 4: To have ours.
• 9:09
  Speaker 5: Let us know what you think down in the comments.
• 9:12
  Speaker 5: It's hard to fall asleep and stay asleep as he
• 9:14
  Speaker 5: needs to be up in my face constantly. And as
• 9:16
  Speaker 5: I move him away or reposition myself to be more comfortable,
• 9:20
  Speaker 5: he screams at the top of his lungs. I work
• 9:22
  Speaker 5: from home most days and he insists on being up
• 9:25
  Speaker 5: in my face. After moving him to the floor or
• 9:27
  Speaker 5: another room, he comes running back to be in my
• 9:29
  Speaker 5: face again. Closing the door behind me is a no-go
• 9:33
  Speaker 5: as he has a tendency to urinate wherever when he's displeased,
• 9:38
  Speaker 5: and I can't keep track of that when I'm working.
• 9:40
  Speaker 5: My two cats like being in my face too from
• 9:42
  Speaker 5: time to time, but if I move them away, they
• 9:44
  Speaker 5: understand I want to be left alone or have my
• 9:47
  Speaker 5: own space where they place themselves semi-adjacent but not intrusively.
• 9:51
  Speaker 4: She messaged me today saying she can't take the cat
• 9:53
  Speaker 4: back today.
• 9:53
  Speaker 5: I tried standing my ground explaining that today is what
• 9:56
  Speaker 5: we agreed upon.
• 9:57
  Speaker 4: He's stressed out since you're not here. I can't have
• 10:00
  Speaker 4: him for much longer.
• 10:01
  Speaker 5: She responds saying that moving the cat today would be
• 10:03
  Speaker 5: considered animal neglect. as she hasn't gotten far in unpacking
• 10:07
  Speaker 5: and there's not a lot of space to move and
• 10:09
  Speaker 5: the cat is stressed out.
• 10:10
  Speaker 4: That's not even real.
• 10:11
  Speaker 3: Yes, it is, Dakota.
• 10:13
  Speaker 4: I mean, it's real. Have you not heard of this?
• 10:16
  Speaker 3: There's a bunch of boxes around the cats let loose.
• 10:20
  Speaker 4: Guess what happened? Cats love squares.
• 10:22
  Speaker 3: No, they don't.
• 10:22
  Speaker 4: They like bags.
• 10:23
  Speaker 5: If it was bags, different story. It just seems like what? Oh,
• 10:27
  Speaker 5: my cat has a playground. My cat has a playground
• 10:30
  Speaker 5: to jump around on and it'll be so upset.
• 10:33
  Speaker 4: This is a non-issue.
• 10:35
  Speaker 2: What are you going to do?
• 10:35
  Speaker 5: Lose the cat in the boxes? You just unpack. I
• 10:38
  Speaker 5: can't handle taking care of him by myself. I've looked
• 10:41
  Speaker 5: forward to moving him out today as it will give
• 10:43
  Speaker 5: me some additional peace of mind after the breakup and
• 10:46
  Speaker 5: now my ex is wanting to move things to a
• 10:47
  Speaker 5: later date. Am I the a-hole for enforcing the previously
• 10:50
  Speaker 5: agreed upon agreement of moving the cat today?
• 10:53
  Speaker 4: And wanting my ex to take her cat back. And
• 10:55
  Speaker 4: there is an update.
• 10:56
  Speaker 5: I mean, like, you're not in the wrong for being like,
• 10:58
  Speaker 5: today is the day, but you can't just.
• 11:00
  Speaker 4: Like throw the cat out on the street. That would
• 11:02
  Speaker 4: be messed up.
• 11:03
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 11:03
  Speaker 4: We've heard none of your plans. Are you just going
• 11:05
  Speaker 4: to deliver it?
• 11:06
  Speaker 3: I really want to call in a cat expert, like
• 11:08
  Speaker 3: a cat owner and ask them, hey, say you and
• 11:10
  Speaker 3: I were dating.
• 11:10
  Speaker 4: I would take my cat. Why am I going to
• 11:12
  Speaker 4: leave my cat with you? I'm taking my cat. It's weird.
• 11:15
  Speaker 4: It's already weird.
• 11:16
  Speaker 5: Today, Sunday, was the new, new day that I was
• 11:19
  Speaker 5: going to move her cat back. About an hour before
• 11:21
  Speaker 5: I got off work, I messaged her reminding her that
• 11:23
  Speaker 5: I'll be at her place in about an hour and
• 11:25
  Speaker 5: a half. And she messaged back, okay, followed by two
• 11:28
  Speaker 5: pictures of her apartment. and how unpacked she was. I
• 11:31
  Speaker 5: didn't reply. Prior to leaving home, I took screenshots of
• 11:34
  Speaker 5: the relevant conversation in regards to us agreeing Sunday would
• 11:37
  Speaker 5: be the moving day up until the pictures she sent.
• 11:39
  Speaker 3: And you put them in a PowerPoint. Understand that it's
• 11:41
  Speaker 3: her day to take her cat.
• 11:42
  Speaker 4: A PowerPoint makes things crystal clear.
• 11:44
  Speaker 3: It really does.
• 11:45
  Speaker 5: Upon reaching her apartment, I did what one user suggested
• 11:48
  Speaker 5: to do. I started a voice recording on my phone
• 11:51
  Speaker 5: in case there would be any angry words or if
• 11:53
  Speaker 5: she started arguing that she couldn't take her cat back.
• 11:56
  Speaker 4: Spoke some general information for the recording.
• 11:58
  Speaker 5: Time, date, blah, blah, blah, and then put the phone
• 12:00
  Speaker 5: in my pocket and carried on inside her apartment. Luckily,
• 12:03
  Speaker 5: she took her cat back with warm, open arms, set
• 12:05
  Speaker 5: up a water station for him without any hassle, and
• 12:07
  Speaker 5: that was that.
• 12:08
  Speaker 4: Yeah, because you're just bringing her cat back.
• 12:11
  Speaker 3: Time out. Time out.
• 12:13
  Speaker 4: Both of you are extra in different ways.
• 12:14
  Speaker 3: Time out. We just spent our precious time... listening you
• 12:19
  Speaker 3: complain about a cat when all you had to do
• 12:21
  Speaker 3: was be a decent human for two more days.
• 12:23
  Speaker 4: And that was that? Yeah, it just took two extra days, bro.
• 12:26
  Speaker 3: Come on. No arguing, no back and forth.
• 12:28
  Speaker 5: It feels like you could have just brought the cat
• 12:29
  Speaker 5: back on Friday and she would have taken it back still.
• 12:31
  Speaker 4: Dude.
• 12:32
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 12:32
  Speaker 3: I understand why she broke up with you.
• 12:34
  Speaker 4: There was no arguing and no anger.
• 12:36
  Speaker 1: No way!
• 12:36
  Speaker 4: No way you just compared yourself to Frodo!
• 12:37
  Speaker 3: No!
• 12:38
  Speaker 4: You didn't earn that!
• 12:38
  Speaker 3: Ha ha!
• 13:00
  Speaker 5: You did not earn Frodo Baggins level tribulations that you
• 13:04
  Speaker 5: went through.
• 13:04
  Speaker 4: That was wild. That's a wild comparison.
• 13:07
  Speaker 3: Did you have to walk 1800 miles to return this cat?
• 13:10
  Speaker 4: Carrying the most evil object known in existence. No. The
• 13:14
  Speaker 4: cat wasn't that bad. It was just annoying. That's it. Anyway,
• 13:19
  Speaker 4: that's the end of that story.
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: My boyfriend put a tracker in my car and called
• 13:23
  Speaker 1: it love.
• 13:24
  Speaker 3: Who else is going to watch after you?
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: I'm 24 female and my boyfriend is 34 male. We've
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: been together almost four years and met in church. I'll
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: call him Gary. I want to be fair. I know
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: I have emotional regulation issues. I have anxiety, ADHD, and
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: abandonment fears. When I feel someone pulling away, I panic.
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: I have begged, called too much, over-explained, sought reassurance repeatedly,
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: struggled to give space, and let my emotions get bigger
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: than I wanted them to. I'm in therapy and trying
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: to work on this. I'm not pretending I'm perfect, but
• 13:54
  Speaker 1: I feel like the whole story has become about my
• 13:56
  Speaker 1: reactions while his behavior gets minimized or excused. There have
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: been control issues. He has described himself as the leader
• 14:03
  Speaker 1: of the relationship and has said or implied that if
• 14:06
  Speaker 1: I go out without letting him know, he will react
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: a certain way. He has had issues with me going
• 14:11
  Speaker 1: out alone and with other men seeing or wanting me.
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: At one point, after I came back from three months
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: of leave in Florida, he put a tracker in my car.
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: Before that leave, we had a major fight where I
• 14:22
  Speaker 1: asked him to take his clothes and leave my apartment
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: because he wasn't helping me pay rent and things were bad.
• 14:27
  Speaker 1: He treated it like I punted him out, punished me
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: by not speaking to me for about eight days, and
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: took his money out of our joint bank account. I
• 14:35
  Speaker 1: was crying so much and under so much stress. My
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: parents were almost begging me to leave him. They told
• 14:40
  Speaker 1: me he wasn't good for me and that he says
• 14:42
  Speaker 1: mean things to me. By the way, this comes from
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: Caterpillar New, 6458. And if you want to submit your
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: own stories, go to the r slash OK Storytime subreddit.
• 14:49
  Speaker 1: I'm Sophia.
• 14:49
  Speaker 3: I'm Riley.
• 14:50
  Speaker 2: I'm Keon.
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: And we're here to give good advice goofily, but we
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: don't have all the answers, so put your answers below.
• 14:56
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I was in a relationship like this once. Not
• 14:58
  Speaker 3: the controlling part, but where my parents were like, you can't,
• 15:00
  Speaker 3: shouldn't be with this person, they're mean to you. I
• 15:02
  Speaker 3: didn't listen.
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: Well, yeah, you don't want to. You're like, I know best,
• 15:04
  Speaker 1: I know best. While I was in Florida, I got better.
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: I started going to the gym and felt more stable.
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: When I came back, he was all over me again.
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: And then the tracker situation happened. We went to therapy
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: after that because he was scared. But in therapy... He
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: minimized his role and would say things like, I never
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: did that. We didn't finish the therapy series because in
• 15:23
  Speaker 1: his mind, he didn't really need it. I worked in healthcare.
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: I'm applying to PA school and I'm under a lot
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: of stress trying to keep my life together. He recently
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: got accepted into a graduate program and didn't even tell
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: me at first because he accused me of not believing
• 15:36
  Speaker 1: in him and stressing him out. At that time, I
• 15:39
  Speaker 1: was still dealing with the emotional fallout from the tracker situation.
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: Last week, He had been cold with me all day,
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: and I had become so distressed that I ended up
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: in the ER, maybe? I was dehydrated, needed IV fluids,
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: and couldn't work. I called him 21 times, telling him
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: I was sick and in the ER. I know calling
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: 21 times is not healthy, and I take accountability for that.
• 16:01
  Speaker 4: OP.
• 16:01
  Speaker 2: OP what? OP, you know what?
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: First time what? We can call 21 times if we're
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: in the ER.
• 16:06
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's... That's valid.
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah, OP would be like the type of person who's
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: bleeding out. And she's like, I called him 21 times
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: because I was bleeding out. But I know that's not healthy.
• 16:15
  Speaker 2: This is my fault. This is my fault.
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: Bro! But he turned his phone off and went to sleep.
• 16:20
  Speaker 1: I was hurt because I felt like my panic was
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: being judged without anyone looking at what triggered it. Recently,
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: after another serious argument, I was crying and... begging. He
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: knew I was devastated, lonely, exhausted from long healthcare shifts,
• 16:34
  Speaker 1: and not okay. He tried to call my mom, but
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: she didn't answer. Later, he said the only reason he
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: wasn't calling my mom was because he didn't want my
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: job or life to be in jeopardy. Then he said
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: something like, stay in your corner and do the work
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: and I'll stay in mine. After that, he didn't speak
• 16:48
  Speaker 1: to me for about three days. The most recent arguments
• 16:52
  Speaker 1: started because I told him I wasn't feeling well. He said,
• 16:54
  Speaker 1: what can I do? If you're not feeling well, go
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: to the hospital. Maybe that sounds practical.
• 16:58
  Speaker 5: We don't go to the hospital every time we feel bad.
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: We just want our partners to make us soup. I
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: didn't feel comforted. I felt like my pain was an inconvenience.
• 17:07
  Speaker 1: I feel like I poured my life, time, emotions, and
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: money into this person. I loved him before the car,
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: before the business, before the graduate program, before everything. I
• 17:16
  Speaker 1: loved him for him... I lent him about $ 4, 000 for
• 17:20
  Speaker 1: his car and about $ 3, 000 for his business.
• 17:23
  Speaker 3: This man is 34 and he can't get his own money?
• 17:25
  Speaker 3: That's wild.
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: I bought him gifts, supported his business opening, showed up
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: for his family, was there when his cousin gave birth,
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: helped with his cousin's child, drove his younger female cousins
• 17:35
  Speaker 1: to her graduation so she could make it in time
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: to walk, cooked, adjusted and tried to be useful and
• 17:40
  Speaker 1: supportive in his world. But during conflict, he has minimized
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: my sacrifices. He called me cheap and called my sacrifices cheap.
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: He asked where I was when he needed chairs put
• 17:50
  Speaker 1: up for his business. He said or implied I didn't
• 17:53
  Speaker 1: support his business, even though I loaned him money. He
• 17:56
  Speaker 1: also said I never wanted him to open his business
• 17:58
  Speaker 1: because I was jealous that other women would want him.
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, what other women? What other women?
• 18:03
  Speaker 2: This has to be rage bait.
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: Then he turned around and said he sacrificed more for me.
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: He has called me crazy and selfish. He said he
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: could have a normal relationship with other women because there's
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: something wrong with me. When I got another cat, he
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: got upset and said, you can treat animals well, but
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: not me. It feels like everything becomes evidence that I'm
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: failing him. There's also a family dynamic. I'm not saying
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: every member of his family is bad, because there are
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: people I genuinely care about, but overall, I feel like
• 18:27
  Speaker 1: his family system protects him and frames him as the victim,
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: while my reactions become the focus. His own sister has
• 18:34
  Speaker 1: struggled emotionally in that family system, and from what I understand,
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: He treated her harshly and framed her as unstable instead
• 18:42
  Speaker 1: of supporting her. His sister-in-law told me she wouldn't recommend
• 18:45
  Speaker 1: him to her friends because he's too hard. And that
• 18:47
  Speaker 1: other woman would probably not be able to tolerate him
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: the way I did. OP's not tolerating him.
• 18:52
  Speaker 2: OP, everyone's telling you to run. Run, girl.
• 18:55
  Speaker 1: Like his own family is saying run.
• 18:57
  Speaker 2: He's telling you to run.
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah, he literally is. Yesterday, I drove his younger female
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: cousin to her graduation. Because I picked her up, she
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: made it in time to walk. I saw him there.
• 19:07
  Speaker 1: He said hi, then completely ignored me. What? During the
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: same period, while he knew I was emotionally devastated, and
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: while I was literally helping his family, he posted a
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: story saying accountability, a simple word that many struggle with,
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: and for which they pay a heavy price for having
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: ignored this definition. That felt directed at me because the
• 19:25
  Speaker 1: conflict had been framed as me needing accountability, even though
• 19:28
  Speaker 1: I had been begging, crying, working long shifts and still
• 19:31
  Speaker 1: showing up for his family.
• 19:33
  Speaker 3: Dude, he's just trying to punish you. He's trying to
• 19:35
  Speaker 3: admit as much pain as he can.
• 19:37
  Speaker 1: Later that night, he texted me. It was good to
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: see you. Hope you can continue to take care of yourself.
• 19:41
  Speaker 3: Good night.
• 19:42
  Speaker 1: It felt soft but distant with no apology or repair.
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: I also regret that in my pain, I spoke to
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: one of his older male cousins who is a church
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: elder and told him I was hurt that Gary hadn't
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: spoken to me for three days. Later, I texted that
• 19:55
  Speaker 1: cousin asking him to please give it a few days
• 19:58
  Speaker 1: before approaching Gary because I felt I had approached him
• 20:00
  Speaker 1: at the wrong time. I know involving family was messy.
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: But I was overwhelmed and looking for someone mature to
• 20:06
  Speaker 1: understand that I was hurting too. I know I need
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: to take accountability. I know begging, calling repeatedly, and panicking
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: are unhealthy. But I also feel like his silence, control, dismissiveness,
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: and harshness fuel my anxiety. And then my reaction becomes
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: the only thing anyone focuses on. I'm not asking people
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: to decide who is right or wrong. I know I
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: have emotional regulation issues and I am actively working on
• 20:28
  Speaker 1: them in therapy. What I need help with is understanding
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: how to protect myself emotionally. Now, for people who have
• 20:33
  Speaker 1: been in relationships with silence, control, blame shifting, or emotional punishment,
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: how did you start rebuilding your self-worth? How did you
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: stop chasing reassurance from someone who kept hurting you? What
• 20:44
  Speaker 1: boundaries helped you finally stand up for yourself? I still
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: love him, but I'm exhausted and I don't want to
• 20:49
  Speaker 1: keep losing myself trying to prove I'm worthy of tenderness.
• 20:53
  Speaker 1: How do I take accountability for my emotional reactions without
• 20:56
  Speaker 1: accepting blame for everything he did too by breaking up
• 20:59
  Speaker 1: with him?
• 20:59
  Speaker 3: Here's what's going to happen. Yeah. Hope he's going to
• 21:01
  Speaker 3: read Reddit comments. Going to get herself straight. Oh, yeah.
• 21:05
  Speaker 2: Oh, don't worry. I'm on it.
• 21:05
  Speaker 3: We got an update coming up. People are going to
• 21:08
  Speaker 3: set her straight.
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: I'm just going to be like, I didn't realize that
• 21:10
  Speaker 1: all of these things were huge red flags. And thank
• 21:12
  Speaker 1: you guys for helping me understand that it wasn't me.
• 21:15
  Speaker 4: Dude, I can't help it.
• 21:16
  Speaker 3: But I was making conversations like this with myself, with
• 21:19
  Speaker 3: my ex. She didn't like certain aspects of me. And
• 21:21
  Speaker 3: I was doing my best to try and show to her.
• 21:24
  Speaker 3: I was enough. I kept trying to prove to her
• 21:25
  Speaker 3: that I was enough.
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: Shouldn't have to prove it.
• 21:27
  Speaker 3: And whenever that ended, dude, the amount of weight off
• 21:30
  Speaker 3: my shoulders, it was like 500 pounds were off my shoulders.
• 21:33
  Speaker 3: I felt light.
• 21:34
  Speaker 1: Unburdens you. Since then, we've mostly been untangling our lives.
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: We closed our joint bank account. He immediately sent me
• 21:40
  Speaker 1: the money he owed me, and I told him I'd
• 21:42
  Speaker 1: be removing myself from his insurance. I genuinely want all
• 21:44
  Speaker 1: communication to stay about logistics. After I unblocked him for that,
• 21:48
  Speaker 1: he texted me saying that now that I wasn't blocked,
• 21:50
  Speaker 1: he wanted me to know there was no hatred in
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: his heart, that he was working on himself, that his
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: family regrets everything that happened, that he hadn't really told
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: anyone about the breakup, and that if I ever needed anything,
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: not to hesitate to reach out. Then he called me. Twice.
• 22:03
  Speaker 1: I didn't answer. This is where I'm confused. This is
• 22:06
  Speaker 1: the same man who told me he wanted the breakup,
• 22:08
  Speaker 1: repeatedly said he wanted peace, ignored me for days afterward,
• 22:11
  Speaker 1: and made me feel like I was simply too much.
• 22:13
  Speaker 1: Now that I finally stopped chasing him and started accepting
• 22:16
  Speaker 1: that it's over, he's calling? I don't know what changed.
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: My parents know he called, and they both made it
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: very clear that if I ever got back together with him,
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: they couldn't support that decision because they watched this relationship
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: change me in ways that scared them. Even now, they
• 22:30
  Speaker 1: don't fully believe me when I tell them I'm not
• 22:32
  Speaker 1: going back because they know how much I loved him.
• 22:35
  Speaker 1: One thing that's also been weighing on me is conversations
• 22:37
  Speaker 1: I've had with one of his cousins. She continued checking
• 22:40
  Speaker 1: on me and has been incredibly kind. She told me
• 22:42
  Speaker 1: she believes he resented me because I made more money
• 22:45
  Speaker 1: than he did. That surprised me because he was a
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: lawyer in his home country. He's incredibly intelligent and he
• 22:51
  Speaker 1: was recently accepted into a master's program here. She also
• 22:54
  Speaker 1: told me he had spoken to a family about how
• 22:56
  Speaker 1: I didn't hold him down. That one really hurt because
• 22:58
  Speaker 1: I loved him before the car, before the job, before
• 23:01
  Speaker 1: any of those things. I loved him when he was
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: still new to the US and trying to build a life.
• 23:05
  Speaker 1: I never cared what he had. Hearing that almost made
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: me feel like the entire relationship had been rewritten. She
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: also told me something else that made me think. My
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: ex has an older cousin he looks up to almost
• 23:15
  Speaker 1: like a father figure. According to her, this cousin was
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: the one who told my ex that putting a tracker
• 23:21
  Speaker 1: in my car was normal and an expression of love
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: rather than control. My mom always worried that if I
• 23:27
  Speaker 1: married my ex, I'd end up repeating the same unhealthy
• 23:30
  Speaker 1: relationship patterns she believed existed in that part of the family.
• 23:34
  Speaker 3: Thank the Lord you're away from this man. You're making
• 23:37
  Speaker 3: moves away from him.
• 23:38
  Speaker 1: You're seemingly broken up. Stay broken up. Hold strong.
• 23:42
  Speaker 3: And you will find yourself sooner rather than later.
• 23:45
  Speaker 1: The strange part is that I don't really feel the
• 23:47
  Speaker 1: overwhelming panic anymore. Now I mostly feel.
• 23:50
  Speaker 2: No.
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: I'm spending time with my family. My siblings are coming
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: from Florida soon. I still want to get married one day.
• 23:55
  Speaker 1: I still want children. Part of me is scared about
• 23:58
  Speaker 1: starting over at 24, but another part of me knows
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: I can't build a marriage on hopes that someone will
• 24:02
  Speaker 1: eventually become different. I don't hate him. I genuinely hope
• 24:06
  Speaker 1: he gets help if he needs it. I just still
• 24:08
  Speaker 1: can't understand one thing. If someone says they want peace,
• 24:11
  Speaker 1: asks for the breakup, ignores you for days and then
• 24:13
  Speaker 1: starts calling you once you've accepted it's over, what do
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: you think is usually going through their mind? They want
• 24:18
  Speaker 1: you to chase them and then they realize that you're
• 24:21
  Speaker 1: not going to do that and then they freak out.
• 24:24
  Speaker 1: I'm genuinely asking because I don't plan on answering, but
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: I'm still trying to make sense of it. And that's
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: the end of the story.
• 24:29
  Speaker 3: Who is telling you to stay with this person?
• 24:31
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 24:32
  Speaker 3: If I was a therapist, I know I'm not supposed
• 24:33
  Speaker 3: to guide people around.
• 24:35
  Speaker 1: But I'd be like, girl.
• 24:37
  Speaker 3: This was you before. This is you now. If you
• 24:38
  Speaker 3: keep going in this path, this is what you're going
• 24:40
  Speaker 3: to end up as.
• 24:41
  Speaker 2: Stop. And also stop talking to his cousin, cousins, family.
• 24:44
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we don't need to talk to any of his family.
• 24:46
  Speaker 2: Just cut it off. Easy.
• 24:47
  Speaker 1: We're done. You've got your family and they seem like
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: they're looking out for you.
• 24:51
  Speaker 3: And that's the end of this story. We're going to
• 24:52
  Speaker 3: read the next one.
• 24:53
  Speaker 1: My sister wanted to shut down our whole business for
• 24:56
  Speaker 1: her wedding day.
• 24:57
  Speaker 2: That's bad business.
• 24:59
  Speaker 1: So me and my husband own a livery yard and
• 25:01
  Speaker 1: he's a riding instructor. We have students come to ride
• 25:04
  Speaker 1: at our property and people who pay to stable their
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: horses here and use the facilities.
• 25:08
  Speaker 2: Gotcha.
• 25:09
  Speaker 1: Last year, my sister asked if she could use part
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: of the orchard for a small wedding.
• 25:13
  Speaker 2: Oh.
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: I said I could square off an area for a
• 25:16
  Speaker 1: while if needed. She wanted two days, one for the
• 25:19
  Speaker 1: wedding and another one for her baby shower. I agreed
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: under the assumption her demands would be reasonable.
• 25:26
  Speaker 2: Was the baby shower and the wedding going to be
• 25:27
  Speaker 2: back to back?
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: I guess so. Or maybe, maybe not. Maybe she just
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: wanted two separate days. Yeah. Now she is set to
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: get married in May and just messaged me with what
• 25:36
  Speaker 1: she wants for her wedding. No strangers, clients there. No
• 25:40
  Speaker 1: general hustle and bustle around the yard, workers. Empty stables
• 25:44
  Speaker 1: for some of her games, baby shower. No horse odor
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: around the venue itself. No horses around her or in
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: background of pictures. Access to indoor riding area for main
• 25:54
  Speaker 1: baby shower event. No kids on the yard if she
• 25:57
  Speaker 1: wants a child-free wedding. And by the way, this comes
• 26:00
  Speaker 1: from MysteriousGear6351, and if you want to submit your own stories,
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: go to the r slash okay story time subreddit. I'm Sophia.
• 26:06
  Speaker 2: I'm Keon.
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: And we're here to give good advice goofily, but we
• 26:10
  Speaker 1: do not have all the answers, so if you've got answers,
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: give them here. And OP says, I told her I
• 26:16
  Speaker 1: cannot refuse livery clients as they pay good money for
• 26:19
  Speaker 1: unrestricted access, but I can ask them to keep clear
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: of the event and box off our area. This goes
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: for the kids too. We have kids stabling their horses here.
• 26:28
  Speaker 1: I have no right to cut off their access for
• 26:30
  Speaker 1: a day or two. I cannot send away all of
• 26:33
  Speaker 1: our grooms for two days. The horses still need to
• 26:36
  Speaker 1: be cared for, and these people rely on their jobs.
• 26:39
  Speaker 1: It's not fair to them. I can't eliminate the smell
• 26:41
  Speaker 1: of horses. There are still horses living here. It's a stable.
• 26:46
  Speaker 1: It will smell like a stable.
• 26:47
  Speaker 2: I go, hey, sissy, where do you want those horses
• 26:51
  Speaker 2: to go?
• 26:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah, where am I supposed to send them?
• 26:54
  Speaker 4: Put them in the wild.
• 26:54
  Speaker 2: I don't care. Just any one out here.
• 26:56
  Speaker 1: I think you just want a different venue. I cannot
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: remove all horses from the background of an open field. Yeah. Again,
• 27:03
  Speaker 1: they need turnout and the clients pay for their horses
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: to have access to the fields. Overall, I told her
• 27:09
  Speaker 1: I will keep people away from the main event and
• 27:11
  Speaker 1: try to keep it as empty as possible, both with
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: people and horses, but it's still an active business and
• 27:17
  Speaker 1: cannot stop working for a few days. I don't want
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: to let down a lot of our long-term clients. Some
• 27:23
  Speaker 1: have been with us for 10 plus years. and we
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: rely on constant customers to stay afloat.
• 27:28
  Speaker 2: Okay, great. You tell your sister? Sister, right? Yep, you
• 27:33
  Speaker 2: tell your sister. I can't meet those requirements. I'm sorry,
• 27:35
  Speaker 2: you're gonna have to find another venue.
• 27:37
  Speaker 1: Sorry, can't do that. We went back and forth between
• 27:40
  Speaker 1: what was reasonable and what she wanted for a while.
• 27:42
  Speaker 1: She then swore at me full volume in public, insulted
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: both me and my husband, and called her place a
• 27:48
  Speaker 1: crap hole, and then you don't get to be there at.
• 27:50
  Speaker 2: All now wow look at that that was easy for
• 27:53
  Speaker 2: the both of us I go oh.
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: Okay so I see you found a new venue cause.
• 27:57
  Speaker 2: You aren't going online oh you haven't good luck.
• 28:00
  Speaker 1: She then went to her mom and complained I'm being
• 28:03
  Speaker 1: selfish and going back on my promise both her and
• 28:06
  Speaker 1: my mom are pressuring me or trying to into letting
• 28:10
  Speaker 1: her have her way they say I'm putting money over
• 28:12
  Speaker 1: her special day and not thinking of her they're not
• 28:15
  Speaker 1: tight on money there are venues that they can rent
• 28:18
  Speaker 1: and have every one of their demands met Am I
• 28:21
  Speaker 1: putting money over her? Is this a crappy thing to do?
• 28:24
  Speaker 1: I'm not trying to prioritize business over her, but I
• 28:27
  Speaker 1: feel her demands are becoming a bit entitled. Feeling torn
• 28:31
  Speaker 1: as half my family say it's her special day and
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: I should try to accommodate. And the other half say
• 28:36
  Speaker 1: it's my property and I have the right to choose.
• 28:39
  Speaker 1: I know I'm going back on my word, but she
• 28:41
  Speaker 1: changed some pretty big details.
• 28:43
  Speaker 2: Thoughts?
• 28:45
  Speaker 1: And we do have some comments, but what are your thoughts?
• 28:48
  Speaker 2: Hey, Sophia. I want my wedding at Disneyland, but nobody
• 28:51
  Speaker 2: can be there. No kids, no nothing. I get to
• 28:53
  Speaker 2: have Disneyland to myself.
• 28:54
  Speaker 1: Ooh, are you paying the price of, I don't know,
• 29:00
  Speaker 1: probably a couple hundreds of thousands, maybe a million dollars?
• 29:05
  Speaker 2: No.
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 29:06
  Speaker 2: But I want it because I said so and it's
• 29:08
  Speaker 2: my special day.
• 29:08
  Speaker 1: Uh, can't do that. Sorry.
• 29:11
  Speaker 2: Well, I'm going to scream at the top of my
• 29:13
  Speaker 2: volume and tell my mother.
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: I still can't do that. So it doesn't work like that.
• 29:19
  Speaker 3: Yes.
• 29:20
  Speaker 2: That sounds more extreme, but that's what your sister sounds like.
• 29:22
  Speaker 1: It is. I mean, I would just tell her if
• 29:25
  Speaker 1: she works, I would say, oh, OK, so can I
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: have my wedding at your place of work? And then
• 29:30
  Speaker 1: you have to stop business for two days. Yeah.
• 29:33
  Speaker 2: I'm going to make really insane demands.
• 29:35
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 29:36
  Speaker 3: Comment.
• 29:36
  Speaker 1: How are you supposed to not turn out horses for
• 29:38
  Speaker 1: a whole day? Never mind two. Horses need care, turnout,
• 29:42
  Speaker 1: and stall mucked. OP says, it's insane. I think it's
• 29:45
  Speaker 1: because we're not a horsey family, and she knows next
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: to nothing about horses. And her asking for no staff
• 29:50
  Speaker 1: and clients to be present? Unless she's willing to do
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: all the work herself for those two days, that's out
• 29:55
  Speaker 1: of the question. Show season is well. Common says, it's
• 29:59
  Speaker 1: not even about the money so much as it hurting
• 30:01
  Speaker 1: your business. OP says, this was my main fear. The
• 30:05
  Speaker 1: horse community is very connected. Once you have a bad
• 30:08
  Speaker 1: reputation in your area, it's extremely hard to bounce back.
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: And comment, I know the horse business and there's no
• 30:15
  Speaker 1: way what she's asking for would work in a working
• 30:17
  Speaker 1: horse barn slash farm. Are you supposed to air out
• 30:21
  Speaker 1: the fields or something? OP says, I don't think they're
• 30:24
  Speaker 1: trying to be malicious. They are genuinely so far up
• 30:27
  Speaker 1: their own butt, they can't comprehend other people's POV if
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: it goes against their little plan. They genuinely don't understand
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: that their little plan is impossible. I suppose she wants
• 30:39
  Speaker 1: me to air out the horses and stop them crapping
• 30:41
  Speaker 1: for the day? Additional details from OP, relationship with mom.
• 30:45
  Speaker 1: OP says, thank you. I tolerate my mom at family
• 30:48
  Speaker 1: events once a year. But I'm not close with most
• 30:51
  Speaker 1: of them except my siblings. So I'm not overly stressed
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: about it. Just glad I'm secure enough to be all
• 30:56
  Speaker 1: right without them. About sister, Opie says true. She's just
• 31:00
  Speaker 1: always had things go her way with no pushback. She
• 31:03
  Speaker 1: was never taught to regulate emotions and deal with rejection.
• 31:07
  Speaker 1: Or any difficult emotions, for that matter.
• 31:09
  Speaker 2: Sophia, do you hear that? That's K-pop demon hunters. It's golden!
• 31:12
  Speaker 2: Because she's a golden child.
• 31:13
  Speaker 1: She's a golden child! And to be perfectly honest, she
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: didn't go 0 to 100. We had a long back
• 31:19
  Speaker 1: and forth beforehand. OP says she's always been a little
• 31:22
  Speaker 1: out of touch. Mom as well. They have a habit
• 31:25
  Speaker 1: of bouncing off each other and making life very difficult.
• 31:28
  Speaker 1: I just never thought about it until now. It appears
• 31:31
  Speaker 1: I dodged a bullet. And why this venue? OP says
• 31:34
  Speaker 1: running theory is she wants a wedding similar to mine,
• 31:37
  Speaker 1: as we had ours on the property shortly after purchasing.
• 31:40
  Speaker 1: She's not a horsey person at all, so I'm just confused.
• 31:43
  Speaker 1: My mother is just as bonkers. They bounce off each
• 31:46
  Speaker 1: other and end up in these situations surprisingly often. And
• 31:50
  Speaker 1: OP responds to another commenter. We have parking, but enough
• 31:54
  Speaker 1: bathroom facilities for around 50, not 200. which I think
• 31:58
  Speaker 1: is part of the reason she originally said it was
• 32:00
  Speaker 1: a small wedding. OP says both her house and barn
• 32:04
  Speaker 1: toilets are on septic, so she would have had to
• 32:06
  Speaker 1: rent some form of portable toilets, given the facilities are
• 32:10
  Speaker 1: also a good 10-minute walk uphill from where she wants
• 32:13
  Speaker 1: the main venue. And update. My sister and mother have
• 32:17
  Speaker 1: decided to cut me off until I apologize and let
• 32:20
  Speaker 1: her host that.
• 32:20
  Speaker 5: Bye.
• 32:21
  Speaker 3: Yeah. Okay.
• 32:23
  Speaker 1: All right. I can't do that. I can't just make
• 32:27
  Speaker 1: your dreams come true because you asked for them to.
• 32:29
  Speaker 2: I can't even cry a tear. I just don't care.
• 32:32
  Speaker 1: I've got no tears left to cry. I'm not close
• 32:35
  Speaker 1: enough with either to sacrifice our business. Her fiance reached
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: out to apologize on her behalf. Insane that he would
• 32:42
  Speaker 1: want to marry her.
• 32:44
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 32:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah. And tell me he wasn't aware she left it
• 32:48
  Speaker 1: so short noticed and acted like this. He's a great guy.
• 32:53
  Speaker 1: Still not talking to them though. I can't lock this,
• 32:56
  Speaker 1: but for now all is resolved. I'm not hosting her
• 33:00
  Speaker 1: and I'm not talking to her or my mother right now.
• 33:02
  Speaker 1: They've been told if they show up, we will not
• 33:04
  Speaker 1: hesitate to get them escorted off for trespassing.
• 33:07
  Speaker 2: I like how their threat was. We're going to cut
• 33:09
  Speaker 2: you off.
• 33:09
  Speaker 3: And I, yeah.
• 33:10
  Speaker 1: If he's like, okay. All right.
• 33:14
  Speaker 2: That, Cool.
• 33:15
  Speaker 1: Oh, no.
• 33:17
  Speaker 2: No harm, no foul, I guess.
• 33:19
  Speaker 1: Comments. Wouldn't the invitations have been sent out by now,
• 33:22
  Speaker 1: stating the location? OP says, possibly. She hadn't actually started
• 33:26
  Speaker 1: planning or filling me in on anything, so I'm not
• 33:29
  Speaker 1: exactly sure. I hope not. We'll likely lock the main
• 33:32
  Speaker 1: gate day of and hope that works. Comment says, so
• 33:36
  Speaker 1: where's she having her wedding now? Because that self-entitled princess
• 33:40
  Speaker 1: wouldn't be stepping a foot on my property after swearing
• 33:43
  Speaker 1: at me like that. Who does she think she is?
• 33:45
  Speaker 2: She wants the moon. Yeah.
• 33:47
  Speaker 1: Give her the moon. OP says she doesn't have the
• 33:50
  Speaker 1: time to book a nice venue or any venue for
• 33:52
  Speaker 1: that matter. Who knows where she'll go. I hope it's
• 33:55
  Speaker 1: a raging disappointment though. Common says, what would you do
• 33:59
  Speaker 1: if your sister comes to you and wants it at
• 34:00
  Speaker 1: your place? Anyhow, say last minute. Cause she just couldn't
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: manage to get her own venue. OP says, If push
• 34:07
  Speaker 1: comes to shove, my husband said he will call the
• 34:09
  Speaker 1: police and escort them off for trespassing. I've told her this,
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: but I really hope she counts her losses and reschedules
• 34:16
  Speaker 1: if that's the case. And that's the end of the story.
• 34:19
  Speaker 2: All's well ends well for us.
• 34:21
  Speaker 1: I guess so.
• 34:21
  Speaker 4: Yeah, for OP.
• 34:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Your mom, crazy. Your sister, crazy.
• 34:26
  Speaker 1: They're all crazy.
• 34:28
  Speaker 2: No, I want it there, but you have to meet
• 34:30
  Speaker 2: my demands.
• 34:31
  Speaker 1: I want it anyway. I know you can't do anything
• 34:33
  Speaker 1: that I asked you to, but I still want it
• 34:34
  Speaker 1: there and I want you to do those things... For me.
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: But that's the end of that story, and we got
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: another one coming right up.
• 34:40
  Speaker 2: Yes, we do. Hey, it's Keon, the Silly's Goose. We're
• 34:44
  Speaker 2: going to get back to the stories, but here's three
• 34:46
  Speaker 2: minutes of ads from our sponsors. My brother mocked my
• 34:49
  Speaker 2: achievements to my face, so I vented online.
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: He mocked my achievements!
• 34:54
  Speaker 2: So, I rarely communicate with my brother, like, at all.
• 34:58
  Speaker 2: But today, I had to stop by my parents' house.
• 35:01
  Speaker 2: He's there, and he opens the door, like, Oh, we
• 35:04
  Speaker 2: were expecting you? I walked in and said I'd spoken
• 35:07
  Speaker 2: to our mom, just dropping something off, blah, blah, blah.
• 35:10
  Speaker 2: I'm also getting pretty pregnant, and they have a huge driveway,
• 35:13
  Speaker 2: so I'm huffing. He gets me a water as I
• 35:16
  Speaker 2: sit down, which is nice. He then sits down, interview style,
• 35:21
  Speaker 2: and asks how I'm going. How's everything? Again, that's nice.
• 35:26
  Speaker 2: Nice of him. Pleasantries are all I normally stick to,
• 35:29
  Speaker 2: but today I made the mistake of saying my course
• 35:31
  Speaker 2: just started, so there's been a lot going on. I've
• 35:34
  Speaker 2: been working four days a week, I have an 11-month-old,
• 35:37
  Speaker 2: and I just started my master's.
• 35:39
  Speaker 1: And you're pregnant.
• 35:39
  Speaker 4: And you're pregnant.
• 35:40
  Speaker 2: So you got a lot.
• 35:42
  Speaker 4: My mistake.
• 35:43
  Speaker 2: He then gets this huge smirk and says, I heard
• 35:46
  Speaker 2: about this. So you're finally doing it. The last in
• 35:49
  Speaker 2: our family to get their master's.
• 35:53
  Speaker 1: Does everyone in your family have a master's degree?
• 35:56
  Speaker 2: Okay. Yeah.
• 35:57
  Speaker 1: All right. That's so weird to be like, oh, you're
• 36:00
  Speaker 1: falling behind. Don't have a master's degree yet. A lot
• 36:03
  Speaker 1: of people don't get a master's degree.
• 36:04
  Speaker 5: He goes.
• 36:07
  Speaker 2: You finally made it in the family. Good job. It
• 36:12
  Speaker 2: took you long enough.
• 36:12
  Speaker 1: It was so weird. Yeah.
• 36:15
  Speaker 2: I sit there and I have to hold back. I
• 36:18
  Speaker 2: end up just shrugging. But he continues. I was in
• 36:21
  Speaker 2: the study today and I'm looking around at everyone's degrees
• 36:24
  Speaker 2: on the wall. Then I realize, hmm, I'm looking around
• 36:28
  Speaker 2: and there's hardly anything of yours.
• 36:31
  Speaker 1: Shut up.
• 36:32
  Speaker 2: By the way, this comes from user Tidalow. And if
• 36:35
  Speaker 2: you want to submit your own stories, go to the
• 36:37
  Speaker 2: r slash OK story time subreddit. I'm Kion.
• 36:39
  Speaker 1: I'm Sophia.
• 36:40
  Speaker 2: And we're going to be yelling at Opie's brother right
• 36:42
  Speaker 2: now because, wow, that's a lot. Let us know what
• 36:45
  Speaker 2: you're gonna be doing in the comments down below. As
• 36:48
  Speaker 2: Opie says, I end up leaving as he continues rambling
• 36:51
  Speaker 2: with a giant smirk about how effing great he is.
• 36:55
  Speaker 2: I hold back because it upsets my mom. But like, bro.
• 37:00
  Speaker 2: You're 30.
• 37:01
  Speaker 4: You live at home and you don't have a job.
• 37:05
  Speaker 1: Oh, I wish you had said that. I wish you went, oh, yeah,
• 37:10
  Speaker 1: you do have a master's. Great job. What are you
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: doing now?
• 37:13
  Speaker 4: You know what I do?
• 37:14
  Speaker 2: I go into that room, go in that study room.
• 37:17
  Speaker 2: I get that master's, which is just a piece of paper.
• 37:19
  Speaker 2: Maybe it's in a little plaque. I take it out.
• 37:22
  Speaker 2: I wipe my ass with it.
• 37:24
  Speaker 1: Dang. He said that.
• 37:26
  Speaker 2: I said that. It frustrates me so effing much. Like,
• 37:29
  Speaker 2: I'm here being an adult, and you have no idea
• 37:32
  Speaker 2: what responsibility looks like. But then, I think how lonely
• 37:35
  Speaker 2: he must be, and I feel effing bad about it.
• 37:38
  Speaker 1: I think you just say that. Anytime he does that
• 37:40
  Speaker 1: to you, you go, I feel so bad that you're
• 37:42
  Speaker 1: never going to have an adult life like I do. Yeah, wow.
• 37:45
  Speaker 2: Must be really lonely with your master's degree all by yourself.
• 37:48
  Speaker 1: Aww. I hope your master's degree can keep you warm.
• 37:52
  Speaker 2: Ugh, sorry. I just needed to vent. Any advice would
• 37:55
  Speaker 2: be so appreciated. And we have an update, Sophia. I mean,
• 37:59
  Speaker 2: we've said some pretty intense things. But let's be realistic here.
• 38:03
  Speaker 2: If Sam did this to you, or, you know, anybody
• 38:06
  Speaker 2: did this to you, how would you respond?
• 38:09
  Speaker 1: I mean, if it was Sam, I would call him
• 38:12
  Speaker 1: out for it and be like, dude, what? Yeah.
• 38:15
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 38:16
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 38:17
  Speaker 2: Weird.
• 38:18
  Speaker 1: But if it was someone I didn't really care about,
• 38:19
  Speaker 1: I'd be like, okay, I'm just not going to talk
• 38:21
  Speaker 1: to this person. I know.
• 38:22
  Speaker 2: If it's someone like me, because I'm just like, if
• 38:24
  Speaker 2: you're a trash talk, if you can trash talk me,
• 38:26
  Speaker 2: I can trash talk you back.
• 38:27
  Speaker 1: Watch out, Buster.
• 38:28
  Speaker 2: You've opened that can of worms. I will trash talk you.
• 38:31
  Speaker 2: And I'll be like, cool, dude. Don't care. What have
• 38:34
  Speaker 2: you got going on in your life?
• 38:36
  Speaker 1: I'm married and I have two kids and I have
• 38:39
  Speaker 1: a job and I'm getting my master's degree. Yeah, my
• 38:42
  Speaker 1: life is going a little bit better than yours.
• 38:44
  Speaker 2: My future is pretty bright. How's your future looking? We
• 38:46
  Speaker 2: have an update.
• 38:47
  Speaker 1: Ah.
• 38:49
  Speaker 2: I think we got a reason maybe why he's acting
• 38:51
  Speaker 2: like this.
• 38:51
  Speaker 4: Maybe not.
• 38:52
  Speaker 2: Update is titled, My Autistic Brother Saw the Post Four
• 38:55
  Speaker 2: Days Later.
• 38:56
  Speaker 1: Oh, okay.
• 38:58
  Speaker 2: Hey, all. Posted earlier in the week about my brother,
• 39:01
  Speaker 2: a 30-male diagnosed autism, talking down to me and how
• 39:04
  Speaker 2: I've always been told by our mom not to upset
• 39:07
  Speaker 2: him slash speak back to him. You know?
• 39:10
  Speaker 1: It does explain a bit of why your mom doesn't
• 39:14
  Speaker 1: want you to.
• 39:15
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but he's 30 years.
• 39:16
  Speaker 1: Sure. But we don't know, you know, how what level.
• 39:22
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 39:23
  Speaker 1: Like where where he is on the spectrum.
• 39:25
  Speaker 2: I think he should know because if he can treat
• 39:27
  Speaker 2: his family like this, that means he can treat strangers
• 39:30
  Speaker 2: like this. So.
• 39:32
  Speaker 1: It doesn't mean that it's right, but it does make
• 39:33
  Speaker 1: sense why your mom is reacting this way.
• 39:36
  Speaker 2: So anyway, he called me on Wednesday and said he
• 39:39
  Speaker 2: read the post and the comments. I was expecting him
• 39:42
  Speaker 2: to blow up, but he apologized.
• 39:45
  Speaker 1: Nice!
• 39:47
  Speaker 2: Said he appreciated the reality check and thought... He was
• 39:49
  Speaker 2: just having banter. I said it wasn't funny. That he
• 39:53
  Speaker 2: was being mean. And he agreed. I was genuinely so shocked,
• 39:57
  Speaker 2: and we had a nice conversation. The first one in years.
• 40:01
  Speaker 2: He asked me to delete the post now that he
• 40:03
  Speaker 2: had apologized, and I did.
• 40:05
  Speaker 1: Okay. How are we reading it?
• 40:08
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 40:08
  Speaker 2: So, nice chat. All was good. Now today, I get
• 40:13
  Speaker 2: to my mom's house to drop off my son for
• 40:15
  Speaker 2: a few hours so I can go to a hair appointment.
• 40:17
  Speaker 2: We walk in, and she's excited to see him, but
• 40:20
  Speaker 2: acting really weird. She then hands me a pile of
• 40:23
  Speaker 2: paper with my post and comments printed on it. I
• 40:26
  Speaker 2: can't even process any of this at this point. Full-on
• 40:29
  Speaker 2: printed paper like it's police evidence. Turns out my brother
• 40:33
  Speaker 2: saved everything, got me to delete the post, and showed
• 40:36
  Speaker 2: it all.
• 40:36
  Speaker 4: To our mom.
• 40:37
  Speaker 1: Dude. Dude. Come on.
• 40:40
  Speaker 3: Really?
• 40:40
  Speaker 2: You want to play that? You want to play that fight?
• 40:42
  Speaker 2: You want to do that war?
• 40:43
  Speaker 3: All right.
• 40:44
  Speaker 1: Come on.
• 40:45
  Speaker 2: She made me feel so bad and she started defending him.
• 40:48
  Speaker 2: But when she said, remember, he processes things differently. You
• 40:51
  Speaker 2: need to be sensitive and more mature. I effing lost it.
• 40:55
  Speaker 1: And that's what I say. Hey, mom, you actually don't
• 40:57
  Speaker 1: need to get involved because he already apologized for this.
• 40:59
  Speaker 2: Hey, mom, he's also an adult and he needs to
• 41:02
  Speaker 2: be treated like an adult.
• 41:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah. I think you literally say like he came to
• 41:06
  Speaker 1: me and told me that he understands and he's sorry.
• 41:09
  Speaker 1: So clearly he does process it the same in this situation.
• 41:13
  Speaker 2: I don't know if it was the pregnancy hormones or
• 41:15
  Speaker 2: decades of resentment, but I said, absolutely no way am
• 41:19
  Speaker 2: I doing this. This is so childish. Read the post again.
• 41:22
  Speaker 2: And if you can't see there's something wrong here, then
• 41:25
  Speaker 2: I'm done.
• 41:26
  Speaker 1: Great answer. I mean, this was super fair. Your mom
• 41:31
  Speaker 1: read the post and still didn't understand why you would
• 41:35
  Speaker 1: be upset.
• 41:35
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I mean, I didn't grow up with anyone with
• 41:39
  Speaker 2: that behavior of being autistic. So I don't know. how
• 41:44
  Speaker 2: like because i don't know how severe it is like
• 41:46
  Speaker 2: you said we don't know how severe it is for
• 41:48
  Speaker 2: him but let us know in the comments because i
• 41:49
  Speaker 2: feel like if people in the chat who have dealt
• 41:53
  Speaker 2: with autistic siblings or children or anyone in their family
• 41:57
  Speaker 2: are close to them They would be like, no, it
• 42:00
  Speaker 2: shouldn't get to this point. That doesn't excuse their behavior
• 42:03
  Speaker 2: of being malicious.
• 42:04
  Speaker 1: I think it's a super common thing for parents of
• 42:07
  Speaker 1: autistic children to coddle and feel like they can't punish
• 42:12
  Speaker 1: their child because they process things differently.
• 42:14
  Speaker 2: Or they allow things. Yeah, they allow more.
• 42:16
  Speaker 1: Things to go, you know, unpunished. But it doesn't mean
• 42:20
  Speaker 1: that you can't punish them or call them out for
• 42:22
  Speaker 1: their actions. It just means that you have to do
• 42:24
  Speaker 1: it differently so that they understand.
• 42:26
  Speaker 2: Truly. Upi continues saying... I left and took my son
• 42:30
  Speaker 2: with me. He ended up having fun with all the
• 42:31
  Speaker 2: other lovely women at the salon. My hair looks amazing
• 42:35
  Speaker 2: and I feel so proud of myself. The zen I
• 42:37
  Speaker 2: feel having blocked my family is just incredible. I'll reach
• 42:40
  Speaker 2: back out to my mom at some point, but right now,
• 42:43
  Speaker 2: just enjoying some quiet time. Oh, and a massive F
• 42:46
  Speaker 2: you to my brother.
• 42:47
  Speaker 3: Yep.
• 42:49
  Speaker 2: Relevant and top comments. Gometer 1 says, I hope he
• 42:52
  Speaker 2: reads this comment and finds that he is a huge ale.
• 42:55
  Speaker 2: Holy crap. I'm so sorry, OP. That is a huge betrayal.
• 42:59
  Speaker 2: OP says, yes, thank you. And absolutely. I had a
• 43:02
  Speaker 2: great day with my son, even though he tried eating
• 43:05
  Speaker 2: the cut hair on the floor. But I definitely don't
• 43:08
  Speaker 2: need to rely on my family if it's going to
• 43:10
  Speaker 2: cause this level of drama. Gometer 2 says, F your brother.
• 43:14
  Speaker 2: I hope he reads this. OP says, 100%. OMG. I
• 43:17
  Speaker 2: should print this and send it to him. And those
• 43:19
  Speaker 2: are the end of the comments. Yeah, I want to
• 43:21
  Speaker 2: know what he printed exactly. Was it just like the
• 43:23
  Speaker 2: malicious stuff? If it's a full post with comments.
• 43:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah, like how can you not? How can you read
• 43:29
  Speaker 1: that and be like, my daughter is to everyone?
• 43:31
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't know. If your mom's going to coddle
• 43:34
  Speaker 2: your brother till the end of time and, you know,
• 43:37
  Speaker 2: we're not on this planet forever.
• 43:39
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 43:39
  Speaker 2: It's going to be a rude, rude awakening for him
• 43:43
  Speaker 2: when he finds out, oh, his sister doesn't love him
• 43:45
  Speaker 2: or is going to be there for him.
• 43:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Oh, well. It's not your fault. Just, you know,
• 43:51
  Speaker 1: live your life and don't listen to them.
• 43:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah, no need to stoop to their level. You'll be fine.
• 43:56
  Speaker 2: It seems like your life is going pretty smoothly.
• 43:59
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 43:59
  Speaker 2: And pretty happily so. Let them be upset and sad.
• 44:02
  Speaker 2: Let them be. That's the end of that story. And
• 44:04
  Speaker 2: we got another one coming right up.
• 44:07
  Speaker 1: I bought my childhood home with my money. Then my
• 44:09
  Speaker 1: siblings demanded a cut.
• 44:11
  Speaker 2: Ooh, no, not for you.
• 44:13
  Speaker 1: So my mom passed away about two and a half
• 44:15
  Speaker 1: years ago.
• 44:16
  Speaker 2: R.I.P.
• 44:17
  Speaker 1: and I have since sold my childhood home. It's a five-bedroom,
• 44:20
  Speaker 1: three-and-a-half bath, one-story house that sits on a nice chunk
• 44:24
  Speaker 1: of land. I and a few of my siblings grew
• 44:26
  Speaker 1: up here, but after my mom's passing, I was the
• 44:29
  Speaker 1: only one left, as everyone else grew up and moved
• 44:31
  Speaker 1: out when she was still alive. I should mention that
• 44:34
  Speaker 1: I'm a twin, and me and my sister are the
• 44:36
  Speaker 1: second youngest. In total, there are nine siblings, including three
• 44:40
  Speaker 1: sets of twins and one deceased R.I.P., And for those
• 44:44
  Speaker 1: who may wonder, there are five fathers total. Wow.
• 44:47
  Speaker 2: That's a big family.
• 44:48
  Speaker 1: That's a lot of fathers. My mom bought the house
• 44:50
  Speaker 1: a decade before I was born, and the age gap
• 44:53
  Speaker 1: between my older siblings and I is that plus more.
• 44:56
  Speaker 1: I was 20 when my mom passed away, and all
• 44:58
  Speaker 1: of my older siblings and my twin sister had already
• 45:01
  Speaker 1: moved out and begun their lives. I chose not to
• 45:04
  Speaker 1: go to college and stayed home with my mom to
• 45:06
  Speaker 1: help out with my younger sisters, identical twins.
• 45:09
  Speaker 2: Double twins?
• 45:10
  Speaker 1: Y'all have a lot of Siblings that are very far
• 45:15
  Speaker 1: apart from each other. Because of the age gap, I
• 45:17
  Speaker 1: was only ever close with them and my twin and
• 45:20
  Speaker 1: didn't really have... Oh, my gosh. So many twins.
• 45:23
  Speaker 2: There's three twins in this family?
• 45:26
  Speaker 1: Well, there's the younger sister's identical twins and then OP
• 45:30
  Speaker 1: and her twin.
• 45:31
  Speaker 2: Okay, so at least double twins that we know of
• 45:32
  Speaker 2: right now.
• 45:34
  Speaker 1: And didn't really have much of a relationship with my
• 45:36
  Speaker 1: older siblings. By the way, this comes from Far Season 5083,
• 45:40
  Speaker 1: and if you want to submit your own stories, go
• 45:42
  Speaker 1: to the r slash OK Storytime subreddit. I'm Sophia.
• 45:45
  Speaker 2: I'm Keon.
• 45:46
  Speaker 1: And we're here to give good advice goofily. And if
• 45:49
  Speaker 1: you've got advice, put it down below. OP says, I
• 45:52
  Speaker 1: decided that I wanted to sell the house because my
• 45:54
  Speaker 1: sisters were getting an apartment and going to school, and
• 45:57
  Speaker 1: I honestly had no use for the space. I don't
• 45:59
  Speaker 1: have kids, and I thought about renting it out, but
• 46:02
  Speaker 1: I don't want the responsibility of being a landlord. My
• 46:05
  Speaker 1: twins supported me, and I did mention to my other
• 46:07
  Speaker 1: siblings in our family group chat that I was selling
• 46:10
  Speaker 1: the house, but only like two of them responded, and
• 46:12
  Speaker 1: they thought I was joking. Why would you be joking? Okay.
• 46:15
  Speaker 2: It's not a joking matter.
• 46:16
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Fast forward two years later, I have successfully sold
• 46:20
  Speaker 1: the house and announced to my siblings that I got
• 46:22
  Speaker 1: a storage unit for all the old furniture and that
• 46:25
  Speaker 1: they were free to take whatever they want. Now they're
• 46:27
  Speaker 1: in an uproar because they feel that I should split
• 46:30
  Speaker 1: whatever money I got with them because it was not
• 46:32
  Speaker 1: my house to sell.
• 46:33
  Speaker 3: Oh.
• 46:34
  Speaker 1: Then how did I sell it?
• 46:36
  Speaker 4: Were you there?
• 46:37
  Speaker 2: Oh, you weren't, so sucks to suck.
• 46:41
  Speaker 1: I should also mention that the house was completely paid
• 46:43
  Speaker 1: off and all I had to worry about was utilities. Also,
• 46:46
  Speaker 1: my dad was very helpful and paid all the larger bills,
• 46:50
  Speaker 1: so I won't take credit for that. But my siblings
• 46:52
  Speaker 1: were not helpful at all. They didn't even care about
• 46:55
  Speaker 1: the house because they barely lived in it anyway. My
• 46:57
  Speaker 1: dad and sister think that I don't owe them anything,
• 47:00
  Speaker 1: and if I were to split the money with anyone,
• 47:01
  Speaker 1: it'd be my dad. Also, I plan on using the
• 47:04
  Speaker 1: money to go to school and get myself an apartment.
• 47:06
  Speaker 1: Am I being selfish? And edit to clarify some things.
• 47:10
  Speaker 1: My mom did have a will and also a life
• 47:12
  Speaker 1: insurance policy, which she opened while dating my older sister's father.
• 47:16
  Speaker 1: way before I was even a concept. The insurance policy
• 47:19
  Speaker 1: was split between all of us as she had continued
• 47:22
  Speaker 1: to pay into it up until her passing. Her will, however,
• 47:25
  Speaker 1: only listed her first house in it, which she bought
• 47:28
  Speaker 1: with the man previously mentioned. They were not married, but
• 47:30
  Speaker 1: her name was on the deed. He has since passed
• 47:32
  Speaker 1: away and the house was used as a vacation home
• 47:35
  Speaker 1: since it's in Florida. I had no claim to that
• 47:37
  Speaker 1: house because my mom hadn't updated her will and the
• 47:41
  Speaker 1: only children she listed in it were the ones that
• 47:43
  Speaker 1: were alive at the time. which were the oldest, who
• 47:45
  Speaker 1: I will refer to as Jordan, Kayla, and Kara. Jordan
• 47:49
  Speaker 1: passed away. Kayla and Kara decided to keep the house
• 47:51
  Speaker 1: as a vacation home for a while until Kayla needed
• 47:54
  Speaker 1: a place to stay and moved in permanently. Unfortunately for
• 47:57
  Speaker 1: all of us, the will was half butted and done
• 48:00
  Speaker 1: by the cheapest attorney that the previously mentioned man could find.
• 48:03
  Speaker 1: So there was no in all future possessions portion. I
• 48:06
  Speaker 1: did get an attorney. The current house was legally left
• 48:09
  Speaker 1: to her husband, who she was separated from at the time,
• 48:12
  Speaker 1: but had not legally divorced. I found out when I
• 48:14
  Speaker 1: inquired about selling the house that I legally couldn't, and
• 48:18
  Speaker 1: in the state of Michigan, her husband would have to
• 48:20
  Speaker 1: sell it to me or transfer the deed. So I
• 48:22
  Speaker 1: asked him if he would sell the house to me,
• 48:24
  Speaker 1: and he said that he would. But he would ask
• 48:26
  Speaker 1: his sons, my older brothers, what they wanted to do
• 48:28
  Speaker 1: with it first. OP continues, I'm not sure how that
• 48:31
  Speaker 1: conversation went, but they told him that it was okay
• 48:34
  Speaker 1: to sell it to me. So I used my portion
• 48:36
  Speaker 1: of the life insurance money to buy it from him.
• 48:39
  Speaker 1: I guess they thought that I just wanted to own
• 48:40
  Speaker 1: the house for sentimental reasons, but I never hid the
• 48:43
  Speaker 1: fact that I was selling it from anyone. Okay, we're
• 48:46
  Speaker 1: just going to pause right there. The fact that you
• 48:50
  Speaker 1: own the house, immediately they're all in the wrong and
• 48:54
  Speaker 1: they need to shut up.
• 48:54
  Speaker 2: I think all your bases are covered. I think you're
• 48:56
  Speaker 2: so fine.
• 48:57
  Speaker 1: Because I thought maybe, okay, OP's mom passed. The house
• 49:01
  Speaker 1: is kind of up in the air. It belongs to,
• 49:03
  Speaker 1: you know... Maybe all of them. There wasn't a will
• 49:06
  Speaker 1: that specifically stated that. Like, nope. OP bought the house. Yeah.
• 49:11
  Speaker 2: I mean, you did communicate that. I would have been like.
• 49:14
  Speaker 1: And you told them you were selling it. Yeah.
• 49:16
  Speaker 2: I would have been like, hey, I'm selling the house
• 49:18
  Speaker 2: this week. If you want anything, get it.
• 49:20
  Speaker 3: It now.
• 49:20
  Speaker 2: Yeah. And you thought it was a joke? Why would
• 49:22
  Speaker 2: you think it was a joke?
• 49:23
  Speaker 1: Why would I joke about that?
• 49:25
  Speaker 3: Okay.
• 49:26
  Speaker 2: Maybe they like sentimental value of like, I want to
• 49:28
  Speaker 2: see the house one more time. Go ahead.
• 49:29
  Speaker 1: Go see it. Prior to deciding to sell, I offered
• 49:32
  Speaker 1: it to them because I felt guilty.
• 49:34
  Speaker 2: See?
• 49:34
  Speaker 4: Okay. You're so good then.
• 49:36
  Speaker 1: Your bases are freaking covered.
• 49:38
  Speaker 2: If they keep complaining to you, just send them that
• 49:40
  Speaker 2: text again.
• 49:40
  Speaker 1: I just send them a text like, hey, are you
• 49:44
  Speaker 1: also going to split the price that I bought it for?
• 49:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 49:49
  Speaker 1: I was going to just move with the money that
• 49:51
  Speaker 1: I had and let one of them have the house
• 49:52
  Speaker 1: free of charge. But when no one got back to me,
• 49:55
  Speaker 1: I moved forward. She never married my dad and has
• 49:57
  Speaker 1: only been married twice. Also, I should mention that Kayla
• 50:00
  Speaker 1: and Kara had trust funds and their father was pretty wealthy.
• 50:03
  Speaker 1: My brothers, Jake and Josh, lived with their dad after
• 50:06
  Speaker 1: he moved out and never came back. And he fully
• 50:09
  Speaker 1: supports Josh financially. My dad is more lower middle class
• 50:13
  Speaker 1: and honestly didn't start taking care of my sisters, Bella, Paige,
• 50:16
  Speaker 1: and Lily, and I, until we were in grade school.
• 50:19
  Speaker 1: That's the end of the story. You're so fine.
• 50:22
  Speaker 2: You're so good.
• 50:23
  Speaker 1: You're so fine.
• 50:24
  Speaker 2: Also, who was there helping mom when you guys were
• 50:27
  Speaker 2: all having fun with your own lives, you know? I
• 50:32
  Speaker 2: didn't get to have my own life because I was
• 50:34
  Speaker 2: here helping mom. Now I'm going to go to college.
• 50:36
  Speaker 3: Sorry.
• 50:36
  Speaker 1: Sorry. Bummer. I bought the house and I sold it. Yeah,
• 50:40
  Speaker 1: you're good, OP. Continue as you were. But that's the
• 50:43
  Speaker 1: end of that story. We got another one coming right up.
• 50:45
  Speaker 2: Sure do.
• 50:47
  Speaker 1: Hey, it's Angie, your favorite fake redhead host here, and
• 50:52
  Speaker 1: we're going to get back to the stories, but here's
• 50:54
  Speaker 1: a three-minute ad break from our sponsors. My mother pushed
• 50:58
  Speaker 1: her new husband on me as a second father for years.
• 51:01
  Speaker 4: Well, push your mom's new husband back. Push him.
• 51:04
  Speaker 1: My mom, 38 female, and I, 18 female, have a
• 51:07
  Speaker 1: pretty difficult relationship, and it has been that way since
• 51:10
  Speaker 1: her and my dad, 37 male, divorced. Pretty much as
• 51:13
  Speaker 1: soon as my parents told me they were getting a divorce...
• 51:16
  Speaker 1: My mom moved into her own apartment and I didn't
• 51:19
  Speaker 1: like that she wanted me to stay with the babysitter
• 51:21
  Speaker 1: after school when I could stay with my dad. My
• 51:24
  Speaker 1: mom said she didn't want to have to talk to
• 51:25
  Speaker 1: dad like that every day. A couple of months later,
• 51:28
  Speaker 1: my mom ended up in a relationship with a man,
• 51:30
  Speaker 1: 44 male. She later married. We both handled it badly.
• 51:34
  Speaker 1: I yelled and cried because I wanted her and dad
• 51:37
  Speaker 1: back together.
• 51:38
  Speaker 3: Did we get any therapy for this? Nope.
• 51:40
  Speaker 4: Did we go to therapy?
• 51:42
  Speaker 1: Because OP is 18 now, so I think she was
• 51:46
  Speaker 1: We're too young when this happened. She pushed me to
• 51:49
  Speaker 1: love the guy and she kept asking me to look
• 51:51
  Speaker 1: at him as another dad. And she kept trying to
• 51:53
  Speaker 1: make me okay with him babysitting me when she was
• 51:55
  Speaker 1: at work. And she wanted me to do one-on-one stuff
• 51:58
  Speaker 1: with him when things were still very early between them.
• 52:02
  Speaker 1: And I only had a few months to work through
• 52:03
  Speaker 1: the divorce. That's such a bad idea. Why are we
• 52:07
  Speaker 1: forcing the guy that you want your daughter to like
• 52:10
  Speaker 1: onto your daughter? Like, let's ease her into it. Yeah.
• 52:14
  Speaker 5: I mean, if anything, you should have just told your daughter,
• 52:16
  Speaker 5: don't like my new husband.
• 52:17
  Speaker 1: Don't like him.
• 52:18
  Speaker 4: Don't like him.
• 52:19
  Speaker 1: Stop it.
• 52:20
  Speaker 4: And she'd love him.
• 52:21
  Speaker 1: My mom moved him in as soon as the divorce
• 52:24
  Speaker 1: from my dad went through.
• 52:26
  Speaker 2: Yikes.
• 52:27
  Speaker 1: She would get annoyed when I called dad on her
• 52:29
  Speaker 1: parenting time. Every time she would ask me why I
• 52:32
  Speaker 1: didn't talk to Stu, then boyfriend, now husband. Instead, and
• 52:36
  Speaker 1: it would turn into a fight between us. Why you
• 52:39
  Speaker 1: didn't talk to a random new guy instead of your father?
• 52:43
  Speaker 1: I wonder.
• 52:45
  Speaker 5: Yeah, this seems like your mom failed real hard. Yup.
• 52:50
  Speaker 1: When my mom married Stu, she asked me if I
• 52:52
  Speaker 1: would be his little best girl. His what? What? His
• 52:55
  Speaker 1: little best girl? Oh, like a best man, but his
• 52:59
  Speaker 1: little best girl.
• 53:00
  Speaker 4: I hate that.
• 53:01
  Speaker 1: Terrible. And I said no.
• 53:03
  Speaker 3: Honestly?
• 53:04
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 53:04
  Speaker 1: Makes me feel like Stu doesn't have any friends.
• 53:07
  Speaker 4: That is accurate.
• 53:09
  Speaker 5: If your best man is a best little girl who
• 53:12
  Speaker 5: does not like you.
• 53:13
  Speaker 1: My mom told me I was doing it whether I
• 53:15
  Speaker 1: wanted to or not. And I told her I would
• 53:17
  Speaker 1: scream real loud and make the wedding suck if she
• 53:21
  Speaker 1: forced me to. She can't stop even doing that. By
• 53:24
  Speaker 1: the way, this comes from Throwaway Secret Bug. And if
• 53:26
  Speaker 1: you want to submit your own stories, go to the
• 53:28
  Speaker 1: r slash showcase story time subreddit. I'm Sophia.
• 53:30
  Speaker 4: I'm Dakota.
• 53:31
  Speaker 1: We're here to give good advice goofily, but we don't
• 53:33
  Speaker 1: have all the answers. We only know what we do.
• 53:35
  Speaker 1: So let us know what you would do in the comments.
• 53:37
  Speaker 5: And Opie says, well, I will say, yes, her mom,
• 53:39
  Speaker 5: her mom could stop her, but she would need to
• 53:42
  Speaker 5: like put her in like a Hannibal Lecter style, like mask.
• 53:45
  Speaker 3: Yes.
• 53:45
  Speaker 4: Straight jacket. Yeah, but it's probably not feasible.
• 53:48
  Speaker 1: It's a straight jacket, but it also looks like they've
• 53:53
  Speaker 1: retrofitted a really cute little dress. Yeah, around it.
• 53:56
  Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 53:57
  Speaker 4: And she's just, like, standing up there, like... It's like
• 53:59
  Speaker 4: when you put a dog... Strapped to a dolly, like,
• 54:02
  Speaker 4: with a.
• 54:02
  Speaker 3: Mask over her face.
• 54:04
  Speaker 1: It's like when you put a dog in a little tux,
• 54:06
  Speaker 1: you know? It's like the dog is still there, but
• 54:10
  Speaker 1: they have a little tux with legs. You know what
• 54:12
  Speaker 1: I'm talking about? I don't know.
• 54:13
  Speaker 4: All I see is the tuxedo.
• 54:14
  Speaker 3: Perfect.
• 54:16
  Speaker 1: Soon after my mom remarried, my dad dated someone briefly.
• 54:19
  Speaker 1: He saw I wasn't taking it well, so he put
• 54:21
  Speaker 1: his love life on hold until I was older.
• 54:24
  Speaker 3: Well, I know.
• 54:25
  Speaker 1: Who was the good person in this divorce? And it
• 54:28
  Speaker 1: wasn't your mom.
• 54:29
  Speaker 4: Sounds like you should have been with your dad.
• 54:30
  Speaker 1: Does sound like it. My mom got very weird about
• 54:33
  Speaker 1: him dating. And I remember telling her she was dumb
• 54:36
  Speaker 1: and she replaced him. So maybe he should replace her too.
• 54:39
  Speaker 1: Mom told me Stu was better. And she asked me
• 54:42
  Speaker 1: why I wouldn't let him in. I told her he
• 54:44
  Speaker 1: was dumb and I didn't want him. And I was
• 54:47
  Speaker 1: never going to let him be my dad. This fight
• 54:50
  Speaker 1: happened over many years. And one day I told her
• 54:52
  Speaker 1: that I wish dad had found me another mom. So
• 54:55
  Speaker 1: then it would be fair. My mom had some kind
• 54:57
  Speaker 1: of episode over that and she thought it was cruel
• 54:59
  Speaker 1: for me to say that to her face. It was
• 55:01
  Speaker 1: a few months later. My dad took my mom to
• 55:03
  Speaker 1: court at my request and asked for full custody, which
• 55:08
  Speaker 1: the judge granted based on my wishes.
• 55:10
  Speaker 3: Oh, how is that?
• 55:11
  Speaker 1: I just don't understand how that would not be a
• 55:13
  Speaker 1: wake up call for your mom to be like, oh, no,
• 55:17
  Speaker 1: I messed up. Maybe irreversibly.
• 55:21
  Speaker 4: No, that's just everyone conspiring against her.
• 55:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah, she's like, you just all hate me and don't
• 55:26
  Speaker 1: want me to be happy.
• 55:27
  Speaker 4: Yeah, she didn't mess up. The world is against her.
• 55:30
  Speaker 1: I only had to spend four hours every other Saturday
• 55:33
  Speaker 1: with my mom after that, and I did not have
• 55:35
  Speaker 1: to sleep at her house or interact with Stu. A
• 55:39
  Speaker 1: few times she brought him along, and I turned around
• 55:41
  Speaker 1: and left the place we were meeting at. Then, for
• 55:44
  Speaker 1: a whole year, 17 to 18, I didn't see her
• 55:46
  Speaker 1: at all. My mom called and tried to push for
• 55:50
  Speaker 1: the Saturdays together, but I had enough. She finally figured
• 55:55
  Speaker 1: out I was serious about not seeing her when my
• 55:57
  Speaker 1: birthday hit and I celebrated without her.
• 56:00
  Speaker 5: Yeah, dude.
• 56:01
  Speaker 4: Mom, your vibes are bad.
• 56:02
  Speaker 1: Your vibes are just freaking bad. Not my fault. She
• 56:05
  Speaker 1: asked me if I would go to family therapy with
• 56:07
  Speaker 1: her and I said, sure. Could have done that earlier.
• 56:10
  Speaker 3: Should have done that.
• 56:11
  Speaker 1: Immediately.
• 56:12
  Speaker 3: Immediately. Right away.
• 56:14
  Speaker 1: Maybe would have saved your relationship with your daughter. Family
• 56:17
  Speaker 1: therapy started over a month ago. The first few sessions
• 56:20
  Speaker 1: were us explaining our sides of everything. Last session, my
• 56:24
  Speaker 1: mom decided to try and guilt me into seeing Stu
• 56:27
  Speaker 1: as more than just her husband. So she's tried the
• 56:30
  Speaker 1: direct approach of just demanding. And now she's like, well,
• 56:34
  Speaker 1: Stu cries every day because you don't see him as
• 56:39
  Speaker 1: your father. He cries, he sobs every day. And that's
• 56:45
  Speaker 1: your fault. My mom broke down and she told me
• 56:48
  Speaker 1: she had only been with dad before Stu and she
• 56:51
  Speaker 1: couldn't stay with him anymore. And only know one person.
• 56:54
  Speaker 1: That was the reason that she divorced your dad.
• 56:56
  Speaker 4: That's horrific.
• 56:58
  Speaker 1: She couldn't have figured that out before she married him
• 57:02
  Speaker 1: and had a kid with him. That's terrible.
• 57:06
  Speaker 4: Your mom sounds like she just needs therapy.
• 57:08
  Speaker 3: Yes.
• 57:08
  Speaker 1: First. She told me she didn't want to lose her
• 57:10
  Speaker 1: family though. So she wanted Stu to be my dad
• 57:12
  Speaker 1: as well. So it felt like we had a perfect family.
• 57:15
  Speaker 1: Can't force a perfect family.
• 57:17
  Speaker 5: So in an effort to save your family, you alienated
• 57:23
  Speaker 5: your daughter and ruined your family.
• 57:26
  Speaker 1: It's also so interesting to me that OP's mom had
• 57:29
  Speaker 1: this whole conversation about, oh, well, I've only been with
• 57:31
  Speaker 1: one person and then immediately marries the first person she meets.
• 57:36
  Speaker 4: Yeah, that's what I would call mentally ill.
• 57:40
  Speaker 1: Opie says when I didn't rush to say anything she
• 57:43
  Speaker 1: started crying harder and repeating over and over how she
• 57:46
  Speaker 1: just wanted us to be a normal family but it
• 57:48
  Speaker 1: couldn't be with dad and how it hurts her that
• 57:51
  Speaker 1: dad can date now and have relationships but I won't
• 57:54
  Speaker 1: let her be fully happy in hers. They're just not
• 57:57
  Speaker 1: the same situation.
• 57:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah, 0%.
• 58:00
  Speaker 4: You know what? I wasn't going to show this, but
• 58:02
  Speaker 4: now I am.
• 58:02
  Speaker 5: Your mom is doing the therapy to manipulation pipeline.
• 58:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah, she brought you to therapy so that she could
• 58:10
  Speaker 1: use the therapist to manipulate you. I asked her if
• 58:13
  Speaker 1: she would be cool with me calling the next girlfriend
• 58:15
  Speaker 1: mom and letting her be my other mom. Her crying
• 58:19
  Speaker 1: instantly stopped, and she left the session early. Yeah, it's like.
• 58:26
  Speaker 4: Oh, you've... You've caught me. I must leave.
• 58:30
  Speaker 1: Oh, it's like when you say Rumpelstiltskin's actual name.
• 58:36
  Speaker 4: What is his actual name?
• 58:37
  Speaker 1: Rumpelstiltskin.
• 58:39
  Speaker 4: What's his fake name?
• 58:40
  Speaker 2: Terry?
• 58:42
  Speaker 1: Well, no, you know, like in the story when Rumpelstiltskin's like,
• 58:45
  Speaker 1: if you say my name.
• 58:47
  Speaker 5: I am unfamiliar with the story of Rumpelstiltskin, honestly. All
• 58:51
  Speaker 5: I remember is that scene from Shrek 4 where he's just.
• 58:53
  Speaker 4: Like, sign it.
• 58:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah sign it yeah so he's kind of like that
• 58:57
  Speaker 1: he's a little trickster tricks people into giving them they're
• 59:00
  Speaker 1: like first born or whatnot and but if you trick
• 59:04
  Speaker 1: him into saying his name then you're you're scot-free and
• 59:08
  Speaker 1: it feels like the mom is like oh you've said
• 59:11
  Speaker 1: my name i must go i have.
• 59:13
  Speaker 5: To go now you know what anyway taking it out
• 59:17
  Speaker 5: of rumplestiltskin it it really does feel like when someone
• 59:21
  Speaker 5: has been accused of cheating and they're like.
• 59:24
  Speaker 4: What no i would never that's so crazy and.
• 59:26
  Speaker 5: Then you're like i have the evidence i have all
• 59:28
  Speaker 5: the messages and then they just And they're.
• 59:31
  Speaker 4: Like, well, I cheated because you weren't like good enough.
• 59:34
  Speaker 4: And it's like, okay, there's so many.
• 59:36
  Speaker 5: We've got, we've got, I've got five more in the
• 59:39
  Speaker 5: chamber I could pull out right now.
• 59:40
  Speaker 4: I will keep them there.
• 59:41
  Speaker 1: Now she's angry and she asked me how I could
• 59:43
  Speaker 1: watch her cry and pour her heart out and still
• 59:46
  Speaker 1: won't give her what she wants. She's like, wait, I
• 59:48
  Speaker 1: just don't understand. I guilt tripped you and it didn't work.
• 59:51
  Speaker 4: I cried. The rules say I'm right now.
• 59:55
  Speaker 1: It leads me to question our relationship. I was happier
• 59:58
  Speaker 1: in that year of no contact than I was trying
• 1:00:01
  Speaker 1: to have some little relationship with her. But she is
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 1: my only mom until your dad gets remarried.
• 1:00:06
  Speaker 4: Yeah, according to her logic.
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 1: And despite me asking the other mom question, I would
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 1: never see someone else as my mom, just like I
• 1:00:15
  Speaker 1: would never see someone else as my dad. Yes. And
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 1: that's completely fair. Yeah.
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 5: Sorry, but your mom's crazy and it's going to make
• 1:00:21
  Speaker 5: you think everything that's normal is weird for a long time.
• 1:00:25
  Speaker 4: Go to therapy.
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 1: You just need individual therapy and you got to work that,
• 1:00:30
  Speaker 1: you know, work all of that out. But at least
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 1: you got a cool dad who loves you.
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 4: Cool dad alert.
• 1:00:36
  Speaker 1: But that's the end of that story and we got
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 1: nothing more.
• 1:00:39
  Speaker 3: No, we don't.
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 2: Yes, we do.
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 1: We got nothing else. That's the end of the episode.