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EP 34 Overcome Alcohol Addictions - Stephanie Wrightsman · iRefresh Podcast

• 0:05
  After a decade of gathering women together for prayer, we are inspired to bring our words of encouragement to you. This is iRefresh. So tonight we're gonna talk about how to overcome. What it's like to be a Christian and maybe have a repetitive sin in your life that you just don't know how to shake. How do we overcome that?
• 0:26
  My area of struggle was alcohol, and I'm not going to get too much into my story tonight. There is a podcast. Feel free to go to the iRefresh website. You can listen to my story. We might touch on a couple of nuggets. So it was more of an obvious stronghold, maybe something like adultery or even gossip, something very obvious. But what about those sins that aren't so obvious? What about like jealousy or covetousness?
• 0:53
  How about something like anger or pride? When we struggle with that constant thing over and over, what about those sins? Billy Graham defines sin and he defines sin as any thought, word, or deed that falls short of God's will. As I was looking through the Bible, and I realized that really all sin has one thing in common, and that's that it separates us from God.
• 1:24
  So how do we overcome repetitive sins in our lives? Matthew 6.33 says, Seek first the kingdom of God and all his righteousness, and all else will be added unto you. So let's break this down. First, seek first the kingdom of God. What this is really telling us is what do we believe about God? Do we believe that he is good?
• 1:51
  Do we believe that he is for us? It's foundational.
• 1:56
  Isaiah 41.10 says, Fear not, for I am with you. Be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you. I will help you. I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Second part of the verse is his righteousness. And I love this part. His righteousness, that is who we are in Christ. It's so very important. 2 Corinthians 5.21 tells us, We are the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus.
• 2:26
  That is who we are.
• 2:28
  We don't identify with that thing, that thorn in our side that maybe Paul had or that we may have. That's not our identity. We are the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus. You know, I was listening to Christian TV today and I heard a speaker talk about in the middle of his repetitive sin, he would say, I am the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus. And he would just keep saying that even while he was doing it. And sure enough, eventually he stopped doing it.
• 3:00
  And it made me realize, you know, what we feed grows. What are we feeding? Are we feeding the behavior? Or are we feeding the spirit man, who we are in Christ? By seeking first his kingdom, which is who he is, and by embracing his righteousness, which is who we are, we take the focus off sin, which is ourself, and we place it on the solution, which is Christ.
• 3:30
  I'm going to share a little nugget from my story here. It took me a long time to come to this revelation, like at least a decade, if not longer. The whole time I was struggling in my addiction, I was a Christian before alcohol ever really took over my life. And the whole time I was really struggling, I heard that small, still voice tell me, just seek me.
• 3:53
  You see, I was trying to go to all these meetings and to do everything just right. And if I go to these meetings and if I do these 12 steps and if I make a gratitude list and if I do all these things and it's going to go away, do, do, do, do, do. And the whole time I heard the Lord say to me, just seek my face.
• 4:14
  And it wasn't until the goodness of my siblings, they had an intervention and they sent me to a treatment program, that God did for me what I couldn't do for myself. I had six months, I didn't worry about
• 4:28
  any bills I had to pay. I didn't worry about my children. They were well taken care of. I literally read my Bible for six months in this treatment center, and he did for me what I couldn't do for myself. I sought first the kingdom of God, and I fell in love with him. And I found out who I was in him and those desires. I haven't had the desire to drink for six and a half years now, not once. And that is who the Son sets free is free indeed. That is the power of the cross. So in Romans 5.8, we learn...
• 4:59
  For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on things of the Spirit. If you believe who God is, and if you believe he is for you, you know, and you know who you are in Christ, you will overcome because you will have the revelation that we are fighting from victory. We are not fighting for victory.
• 5:28
  that victory was solidified on the cross. We want to talk tonight about something, an obstacle that the enemy throws, I think, especially when you're a Christian. You know, Christians aren't supposed to behave like that. I know I believed the lie that maybe I just didn't love God enough. Maybe that's why I couldn't stop drinking. Maybe there was something, maybe I wasn't saved. That was another one that I believed for a while.
• 5:54
  But the thing I want to talk about is shame, because it's a powerful tool the enemy uses. And when we allow that shame to manifest, it will lead us directly down the path of the very thing that we're trying to get away from. So how do you know the difference? How can you discern the difference between shame and conviction? It's very simple. Shame is going to point you.
• 6:18
  to yourself, whereas conviction is going to point you to God. There's a couple of ah-has where God delivered me from shame I'd like to share with you. One of them was in my treatment center, and I was in the prayer room. I had prayed, honestly, for a couple of decades. I saw my drinking taking off, and I thought, oh, I could control it. But it never, it just continued to get worse. But I had prayed for a couple of decades, Lord, deliver me.
• 6:46
  deliver me from the drinking, and I didn't know why it wasn't happening when I would be actively rebellious and pick up another drink, right? And when the power inside me was always there to stop. But I was in the prayer room and I was like crying out to God. There was nobody else around. It was just me and God. And I think for the first time, I allowed myself to get real and to get angry with God. You know, why? I knew so many people that had been delivered. I had been in recovery for quite a while.
• 7:14
  Why? Why didn't you deliver me? Why did I waste my children's formative years? That was the part that kept me drinking. I couldn't bear to look at myself as a mother. It broke my heart that I was a negligent parent for my drinking. So when I was crying out and I was saying, God, why? Why didn't you deliver me? Immediately, he dropped a scripture on my heart.
• 7:37
  And the scripture is Romans 5.8. But while you were still a sinner, I set my only son to die for you. And what that scripture showed me was that Jesus loved me just as much in the heat of my addiction as he does right here today, set free. His love for me is not based on my behavior. He took care of that on the cross.
• 8:01
  He's not, I'm not identified by the sins of my past. It does not define me, but he is using it to refine me today.
• 8:10
  and to make me into the woman of God that he has created me to be. The other nugget is I went to a place frequently called International House of Prayer in Kansas City. It is an incredible place where the presence of the Lord is just so very powerful. And I would often go there and spend weekends because even though there's a liquor store right outside there, I never had the desire to drink when I was there.
• 8:34
  And I would just stay. I would go and just stay. And one day I went, and I had been sober for a few days, and I went in feeling defeated. I often felt defeated. I often believed the lie, you're never going to get this.
• 8:53
  You're going to live like this. There's something wrong with you. So I walked in feeling defeated and a woman came up to me. And I had glasses on, which I rarely wear glasses. And she said, you know, the Lord told me, dark curly hair with glasses, she's coming in. He's got a message for you. And she said, He is so proud of you. You keep coming back.
• 9:16
  And here the enemy had kept telling me, you keep failing. But you know what? Jesus says, you keep coming back. That's how he sees us. You keep coming back. So the only person who loses, the only person who's struggling in an area of sin that loses is a person who settles in that sin. Do not settle. It's not who God created you to be. It's not who you are. You were created to be victorious in every single area of your life.
• 9:45
  So do not settle. Get up and keep coming back. He is so proud of you that you keep coming back. You know, and it brings me to the revelation that God gave me, which was it doesn't really make a difference what area that you're struggling in. Whatever area you're struggling in, whether it may be a relationship, it may be finances, it may be a difficult job, the answer is always more of Jesus. It's that simple.
• 10:15
  It's not a complicated thing. There's not 10 steps or 15 steps here. You need to behave and do things just the right way in order to overcome this. It's just more of Jesus. It's just getting closer to him. He is the answer to everything. Romans 8.1 says, Therefore now there is no condemnation for those that are in Christ Jesus. Anything? Not yet. Okay.
• 10:42
  She's supposed to be talking with me, so I'm just waiting. I'm just listening. She is ministering through her testimony. And I think that's so important, is the word of God is life. And it isn't just words. One of the things that you said in the Tuesday morning that really ministered to me was, during her process, there were times where the enemy had her convinced, you failed. You're not.
• 11:11
  you know, you're not doing what you're supposed to do. She was wise enough to let that not stop her, to keep pressing on. She pressed forward for the mark. And I think that that's where the testimony is, is that obedience.
• 11:30
  brings blessing. Obedience is what she has experienced and now the blessing is the testimony. And it doesn't mean that she did everything right every time. And I think that's the greatest tool that your example has shown me is the enemy will use that one line. You're not perfect. And it's okay.
• 11:56
  Nobody is perfect, and we don't have to be perfect. We just have to be willing and obedient. And the Bible says the willing and obedient will eat the good of the land.
• 12:09
  And so I love the testimony of what God has done, but more importantly, the process. The process is what's important, because that's where everybody is. Everybody has a process. And when we hear testimony, sometimes we think that's good for her, but hey, God, what about me?
• 12:32
  And so I think what I'm getting is the process for everyone is different. So when you look at others' victory and you say, hey, God, what about me? I believe he's saying, I'm helping you right where you are. And when you acknowledge him, which is what the scripture you just read, when we acknowledge him in all our ways, he will direct our path.
• 13:03
  So I wanna encourage you tonight, do not...
• 13:07
  Do not ignore the warning signs the Holy Spirit will send your way. Because he will. When you're stuck in an area, he's a gentleman. This isn't, you know, he doesn't, it's nothing big. It's nothing, it's a soft, sweet voice. You know, the Lord does discipline those he loves. I'm very grateful for that. I've experienced significant discipline. And because he loves me. And I'm grateful for every bit of it. But when he sends warning signs to you,
• 13:37
  heed those warning signs. It's so very important. I prayed and I asked God when I was looking at this, what were some of the warning signs besides some of the obvious just disciplinary actions? And the big one that he showed me was I would avoid mirrors.
• 13:55
  in my drinking because I would look in the mirror and I would, like I said, I knew the Lord before my drinking took off. And I would look in the mirror and I would be like, this is not who Christ created me to be. And it wasn't, it was always something to encourage me. It was more like I would look in the mirror and it would be like, but you were meant for so much more. Come up higher. Come on, Stephanie, come up higher. This isn't who you are.
• 14:22
  And so I would just avoid the mirror completely. Don't do that. If he's giving you a warning sign, you know what, you've got the power within you right now to overcome whatever that may be, just seek him, just seek him. And if you slip and you fall down, guess what? It's real simple. You know what, Lord, this is not who you created me to be. I'm sorry I behave like this today. I choose you. And dive into the word.
• 14:50
  You know, I know when I was in the middle of really trying in my own strength, sober up, I frequently... There's a lot of... I don't want to set you on the wrong path. There's a lot of wonderful devotionals out there. They're great add-ons. But the number one book we need to read is the Word of God. And the enemy, one of his tools was I didn't trust myself to read the Word. I was like, I don't understand it.
• 15:17
  Well, guess what? It's not my responsibility to understand it. It's the Holy Spirit's to reveal it to me, right? So I would avoid reading the Word of God, but I'd read what this author has to say about the Word. He's anointed. He can tell me. Yeah, they probably are anointed, and they probably have wonderful things to share, but don't let it replace the Word of God.
• 15:36
  Read the word for yourself. It is alive. It is active. Let the Holy Spirit reveal to you what he needs to reveal to you. But read it every day. It is transforming in your life.
• 15:50
  There are consequences to every behavior. There's consequences to good behavior. There's consequences to bad behavior. I can tell you now, I'm six and a half years sober. I am still living out the consequences with the Board of Nursing for my drinking. That wouldn't have happened if I would have heeded the warning signs long before. And I'm okay with that. There's a reason for that, and I trust God with all my heart. And when he says the time is up, the time will be up, and it will be redeemed. But for right now, I'm walking that out.
• 16:20
  Galatians 6-7, it's a powerful scripture. It says, do not be deceived, God will not be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. And that is very true. I think it's a dangerous, you don't wanna go too far into one ditch. I don't wanna get full of legalism, but at the same time, I don't wanna take grace for granted.
• 16:45
  I want my obedience to be rooted in love. I love you, Jesus, so I'm going to do what your word says. I trust you. I trust the guidelines you've put in your word, so I'm going to obey you. And that's what happens when we read the word of God. We fall in love with Jesus, and our obedience is a natural response. It's not effort. It's not trying. It's a natural response that's done out of love.
• 17:11
  I love that too because one of the things that reminds me, she reminds me of what that particular scripture is, you don't have to have it all together before you come back to the Lord. You know, in her testimony, she openly said she knew the Lord, but she still gave into the fleshly desire. And the fleshly desire in her case was an addiction that she gave into,
• 17:38
  But it did not mean that God loved her any less. And so the important thing is knowing who you are in Christ Jesus. So just because you make a choice that stems out of a fleshly desire, feeding the flesh,
• 17:59
  You can still, the Bible says, if you come to him and confess your sins, he is faithful and just to forgive you for all your sins. That is powerful if you really understand. There is no sin that is too big for God. But the enemy wants you to focus, as you've said, on your sin,
• 18:25
  To keep you, what does sin do? Separate you. To keep you separated. If you get past that point, you've taken away one of his biggest weapons. Now you know you can go directly to the Lord and say, as she did, you know, God, I don't understand. That's okay to say that. And he will bring people in your path. He will illuminate the scripture. Okay.
• 18:52
  And that's what's so awesome is you don't have to look for the one pastor. You don't have to get in the prayer line. You don't have to be at that meeting to get what God has for you. He'll bring it to where you are. And in your case, the beauty of your testimony for me is he met you where you were. You know, he used your family. He used the licensing board. But he met you where you were. And it's beautiful.
• 19:21
  Yeah, and you know, I think of two things when you're talking. First, if your sin is a secret, I'm going to challenge you tonight. Find a safe person. You know, we all have heard the saying, we're as sick as our secrets, but there's truth, ladies, in this. Because the truth is, Satan will really, he'll take you for a ride if you keep a secret.
• 19:42
  One of the beauties is, boy, when you just share it with one other person. Maybe you feel comfortable sharing it with the prayer team tonight. Maybe you feel comfortable with a close friend at home or a pastor or whatever it may be. But get it out because when you keep it a secret, it builds. And that power is just a negative, negative power that's building. But whenever you release it and share it with even one person, the Bible says, confess your sins with one another so that you may be healed.
• 20:12
  Just one other person. I think I've confessed all my sins to hundreds because I am so free. I'm like Satan, you've got nothing on me. Nothing. Everyone knows all my stuff. Yay. Yay. Who cares? Christ took care of every bit of it. Now what? Now what are you going to say? Nothing. I'm free. I go to bed every night with a clean conscience. I wake up with a clean conscience. You've got nothing on me.
• 20:36
  Embrace that freedom. That is what Christ died for. He died. His blood cries out freedom for every one of us. Embrace it. It's so simple to tap into that. It's so simple. And as soon as you get a taste, I promise you, you tell one secret to somebody and you start feeling that freedom, you'll be hooked. You'll be sitting right here telling Facebook all about your...
• 21:01
  All about your secret sin here. The other thing I thought about is, you know, it's so important. What we feed grows. Starve your flesh and feed the spirit. So let's just say it's a simple sin. Let's say it's a sin of overeating, literally, because we're talking about feeding. Okay.
• 21:24
  Find something healthy, find a healthy program, but be very careful, because whatever you're going to feed is going to grow. Just like with the alcohol. Alcohol is so easy, all I've got to do is say, I'm never having a drink again. It's an abstinence thing, right? That's easy to starve, but if it's something in your life, cut it out completely, starve it.
• 21:44
  and replace it. The key is replacement. You can't just say, oh, I'm not gonna do this thing. You have to replace it with the food of the word of God. You have to replace it with a spiritual thing. So you're gonna starve the flesh and feed the spirit.
• 22:00
  And that's a good point, which brings me to my favorite part. One of my favorite parts of iRefresh is their website. And on iRefresh website, iRefresh.net, there is a drop-down menu where you can go into the website and get scriptures. And the beauty of the scriptures is that sometimes we don't have time to go through the Word, even look in a concordance and say, Okay, what does the Word say about...
• 22:30
  overeating. What does the word say about addiction? But you can go into the website and print out the scriptures. And now you have before you a piece of paper that you know is God's word. And you can just read out loud to yourself
• 22:49
  those scriptures over and over and through that becomes powerful you became powerful because now you're doing exactly what stephanie said you are starving that fleshly desire and you're feeding your spirit with the food the word of god
• 23:08
  And so I would encourage you to start there. And after you get those scriptures to where you can memorize them, you don't even have to look at the piece of paper anymore because you've read it so many times, then, you know, the Lord will show you others in the Bible there. It's not all of them, but it's a great place to start. And I think that is really one another tool that the enemy will use to keep you in your bondage is to not give you the freedom to
• 23:38
  you know, what does the word say? How do I, what scriptures, you know, how many times do we have a question, what scripture are you standing on? Well, I don't know. Because I haven't taken the time. Go on the website. Get the scripture sheets. Find the ones that pertain to you and just read them over and over again. It's a great place to start. Yeah.
• 24:02
  Well, to wrap it up, you know, it's a very simple message. But first, focus on Christ and who you are in Christ. I don't know how many people have seen the movie Overcomer. I'm going to steal this right from Priscilla Shire. It was so good. I've given this to so many people. I'm a nurse, and I share this with my patients a lot when I talk about Jesus because they get to hear about him whether they want to or not. But...
• 24:27
  Go to Ephesians, the first three chapters of Ephesians. Simply write down each thing that the Bible says who you are. Just write it down. Jot it down. That's who you are in Christ. It's that simple. So focus on Christ and who you are in Christ. Again, the Bible is alive and active. It will transform you.
• 24:51
  Romans 12, 2 says, "'Do not conform to the pattern of this world, "'but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, "'that you will know the good and acceptable "'and even perfect will of God.'" Secondly, stand on his promises. That is so powerful. Write down the promises that you're believing for and pray them out loud over yourself.
• 25:16
  And if you want to get really bold, pray them out loud looking in the mirror, because that's who you are. That is who you are. Proverbs 18.4 says, A person's words can be life-giving water. Words of true wisdom are as refreshing as a bubbling brook. You know, our words manifest.
• 25:38
  And every word that comes out of our mouth, we are agreeing with one of two people. We're either agreeing with God or we're agreeing with the enemy. And there really is no in-between. There is no gray area. So be very careful. Complaining is a perfect example. You are agreeing with the enemy if you're complaining about something. A beautiful weapon in overcoming is praise. Thank him. What has he done in your life? Praise him for what he has done.
• 26:09
  we know that his word does not come back void. So when we pray the scriptures out loud, we know his word's not gonna come back void. And lastly, stop trying to do in your own strength what Christ has already done.
• 26:23
  It is that simple. The truth is in Matthew 11, 30, his yoke is easy and his burden is light. You simply come to him and he will deliver you. He will set you free just by you getting to know him and knowing who you are in him.
• 26:42
  Amen. Amen. You know, thank you, Stephanie, for sharing your testimony. And, you know, I think a lot of that, it takes a lot of confidence to be able to come before a group of people and share where you are.
• 26:57
  And I really appreciate it. Thank you. Thank you for doing it. It ministers to all of us. And I think that's the beauty of it is, you know, we all know people who have a testimony of what God's done in their life and how they're victorious over it. And it's just awesome. And yay them and praise God. But you know, there's so much power in the people that are in the process. The people that are sharing the journey.
• 27:25
  And they are the ones that are saying, you know what? I have been where you are. And this is what God showed me. This is how God pulled me out. These are the things that I learned. And, you know, that is priceless. Those are just nuggets of beautiful, beautiful nuggets of how the Lord, the things that he taught Stephanie, she now in turn can teach all of us.
• 27:52
  And the beauty is we don't have to experience the pain that she went through. We get to live through her victory and rejoice with her, right? And so I think each of us can look at something in our lives and say, you know what, I may not have the same issue you had, but every one of those scriptures.
• 28:12
  are valid every one of those scriptures is a something i can apply to my life and gain victory over whatever it is i'm dealing with so i encourage each of you take your notes study them study those scriptures if you start with just those scriptures you'll be amazed at how empowered you will feel in the days ahead we thank you very much for coming tonight and for listening