Latest / Hoppe Radio (Hoppe Hour) With Ryan Hoppe / Hoppe Hump Day! (Hoppe Hour With Ryan Hoppe: 5.13.26)

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Hoppe Hump Day! (Hoppe Hour With Ryan Hoppe: 5.13.26) · Hoppe Radio (Hoppe Hour) With Ryan Hoppe

• 0:00
  Puppy Hour starts live in less than 10 minutes.
• 0:02
  Stand by. Let me see what we got here. Violence
• 0:12
  erupted at a steakhouse in Arkansas. I wish I
• 0:17
  could just end it that sentence. You would expect
• 0:20
  violence to happen at a steakhouse in Arkansas.
• 0:25
  But it involved this influencer that said, I
• 0:27
  have 40 million followers. Age of the year, bro.
• 0:31
  She's 22. That's what I'm talking about with
• 0:33
  that mindset. Of those 22 -year -olds who were
• 0:35
  in high school during COVID. So she was 16 when
• 0:38
  she was in high school. So she thinks she's better
• 0:40
  than us. Even though she's a brat. Get him out
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  of here! He's a cat in here! Get him out of here!
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  Get him out of here! 10 million per child. 10
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  million per child followers. Oh, I got 10 million
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  followers. And two friends. Your mom and your
• 1:03
  right hand. You trash. You're annoying. Where
• 1:20
  are they at? They don't care about you. You're
• 1:27
  walking brain rot. Ah, this is what we need.
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  10 million people following a woman that acts
• 1:36
  up in a steakhouse. What a sociopathic moron.
• 1:42
  There's chaos, violence is erupting. This is
• 1:47
  what hell sounds like. A bunch of dumb influencers
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  acting up in a steakhouse like trash. And it's
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  not even really violence, it's just a bunch of
• 2:01
  people in a circle. You're trash. You make all
• 2:10
  22 -year -olds look bad. Guys, here's a word
• 2:16
  to describe you. You're stupid! Don't you feel
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  dumber for, like, realizing that they have 10
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  million followers? Shut up. You're the worst.
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  You're not very smart. You think you're smart,
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  but you're having to walk around talking about
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  your followers. Trust me. I hope you lost a lot
• 2:43
  of followers last night. Because you are an annoying
• 2:46
  person. 856 -49 -HAPPY. Diana, there's a streamer
• 2:58
  named Mia. And I see a little bit of myself in
• 3:01
  him, just like being a beta male for women that
• 3:04
  don't care about you. And there's this weird
• 3:09
  thing going on with him and Alabama Barker. He
• 3:13
  can get any delightful wifey girl he can wipe
• 3:15
  down forever. I know it's not the easiest thing
• 3:18
  to just go on about and go, hey, I want a wife.
• 3:22
  But he's going after Alabama Barker. and he defends
• 3:26
  himself and defended Alabama Barker after his
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  fan base said that she's using him because he
• 3:32
  bought her a Birkin bag, which is stupid. Homie,
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  listen to me. Yeah. I'm not saying you're going
• 3:38
  to have 15 minutes of fame and the streaming's
• 3:40
  going to end, but your net worth is probably
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  $4 million, right? Mm -hmm. Net worth, neon streamer.
• 3:50
  Let me look this up. $10 million. Okay. All right,
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  and he made $1 .4 million in the last five weeks.
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  Good for him. I'm not jealous. No, but Neon,
• 3:59
  you got to listen to me. That Birkin bag, let
• 4:02
  me, I'm trying to teach Neon a lesson. Neon,
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  wait, wait, Birkin bag average price. An average
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  price of a Birkin bag, $13 ,500 to $15 ,000 for
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  the cheap bags and then $25 ,000 to $35 ,000
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  for the expensive ones. Bro, Neon, you bought
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  a girl a Birkin bag for a girl that's just kind
• 4:25
  of using you for clout. How do I know she's using
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  you for clout? Because I've dated girls that
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  used me for clown. And guess what? You should
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  have easily put that in your Roth IRA. Here's
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  $20 ,000. Invest in your future, not in some
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  brawn. Taylor is so fucking beautiful, bro. And
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  by the way, y 'all try to make all my streams
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  about her. Yeah, you know, you're obsessing a
• 4:48
  little bit. I don't want to do that, bro, but
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  the last thing to say about this is this girl
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  can buy all this times a thousand. And she still
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  reacted better than anyone I've ever given a
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  gift to. Yeah, because she's using you. Every
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  other girl was like, you bought me something
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  for $20 ,000. Now I feel like I've got to have
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  sex with you. Eagle star offensive tackle Fred
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  Johnson's pregnant ex -girlfriend exposes him
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  for abandoning her to smash other girls on Hinge.
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  I'm not defending them. What did you expect when
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  you had a kid with an NFL player? That's a quick
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  question. Man, she's got a nice body, though.
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  I can see why he hadn't given her. Hypothetically,
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  if a man were to kick out his eight -month pregnant
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  girlfriend Oh, yeah! and unborn daughter to then
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  be unhinged the very next day Oh, yeah, good
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  for you, bud. I'm kidding. looking for women
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  to have fun with, you know, hypothetically, you
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  would not think that that type of man is a good
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  man or a good father. I guess not. Maybe you
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  get couples counseling because you're going to
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  have to go parent with them. Making a video is
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  just kind of showing that you're a brat. You
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  would probably not think that that type of man
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  has integrity or morals or any form of decency.
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  Does anybody in the NFL do? I mean, look, the
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  Patriots almost won the Super Bowl. And Mike
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  Vrabel was supposed to be the man in the NFL,
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  the family man. He's a cheater. They all are.
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  I'm working on NFL players for their dogs. Right.
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  I'm not defending it, but I'm saying you knew
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  what you were signing up for and now you're playing
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  victim. Shut up. Because I'm just trying to see
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  if we're all on the same page. I don't think
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  we are. I don't think you're on the same page.
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  I think you need to realize you had a kid with
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  the wrong person. And he's probably not going
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  to be around for it again. Take the check and
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  run. Hypothetically. Hypothetically. Just say
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  it. We know what you're talking about. You're
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  doing that thing where you're afraid to say it
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  because of a lawsuit. So you're being passive
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  aggressive. Good luck being a mom. These women
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  were to be aware of the fact that, hypothetically,
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  this man... Hypothetically. Hypothetically, you
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  don't put out enough. ...an eight -month pregnant,
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  now ex -girlfriend, and child on the way, and
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  still decides to want to speak to and have fun
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  with him. Listen, I can see if you're an NFL
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  player and you're an offensive tackle and you
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  get hit in the head a lot and you're very...
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  And you got this annoying woman, this bitch.
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  I could kind of see why you would choose the
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  side chicks. Also, he's in the NFL, and that's
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  what they do. Hypothetically. Hypothetically.
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  Hypothetically, you're annoying to be around.
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  You would think that that kind of woman also
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  has absolutely no respect for herself, no integrity,
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  no more. Yeah, they're side chicks. You know
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  what you were shot enough for? You didn't marry
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  a... You're not a rocket scientist. And no decency.
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  I don't think you have any decency. I think you're
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  annoying. Blah, blah, blah. It may be my fault.
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  Man. And they're going to have a camp together,
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  and that's great. Dad's going to give you some
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  good co -parenting there. Oh, Lord. There's that,
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  and there's this disgusting online. A Chicago
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  priest is under investigation after he was accused
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  of improper conversations. Yeah, this is an ongoing
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  thing. Do you know, I found this out recently,
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  do you know that the Catholic Church has insurance
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  that can pretty much just pay off the victims
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  and that they just sweep it under the rug and
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  put the priest at the next church? Now listen,
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  I try not to hate on the Catholic Church because
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  I grew up in that cult. And my family is Catholic
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  and they despise that I don't believe in Jesus.
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  But what I'm telling you, ladies and gentlemen,
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  boys and girls, is it's kind of hard to like
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  the Catholic Church when you guys cover up pedophilia.
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  Now, if you just came out and said, hey, you
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  know, first of all, we should come out as gay
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  because a lot of priests are. But second of all,
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  the thing is, we should just not be touching
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  kids. But when they try to sweep it under the
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  rug, that's no good. Cardinal Blaise Cupich sent
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  a letter to parishioners of St. Francis of Assisi
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  in the Little Italy neighborhood. I've actually
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  heard of him. He says the Archdiocese received
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  allegations that Reverend Jose Molina Oh, Jose!
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  communicated inappropriately with minors and
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  adult women. I actually cannot stand priests.
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  I don't mind if you want to believe in God and
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  you want some meaning in your life. That's fine.
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  You're right as a human. But there is some pedophile
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  problem in that church. I don't know what it
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  is. It's very off -putting. It's very off -putting
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  how Catholics just accept it. They're like, oh,
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  well, you know. But God loves me. Very weird.
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  Very weird. Um, this really annoyed me. I don't
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  know, what show is this? Yahoo Sports? I don't
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  know what already is the problem in this situation.
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  They interviewed Ric Flair about Luka Doncic's
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  injury. You mean the same Ric Flair that bothers
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  people and harasses women at Florida bars all
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  day? That's who we're going to for NBA analysis?
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  No, no, no, no, no, no, no. I'm not kidding.
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  The drunken idiot. Who acts like an asswipe in
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  public. And is walking around looking to get
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  recognized. He is the authority on NBA injuries.
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  I'm having fun. I'm such a Laker fan. I just
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  honestly believe. How long are you in a fan?
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  Two days? Of course, I don't know anything about
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  the extent of his injury. So then just stop talking,
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  moron. But, um... When the first time I saw it,
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  I did the same thing to the quarterback for the
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  49ers a couple years ago. I was like, get back
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  in the game, man. Yeah, how did that work out?
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  You came up in an era where everybody, you know,
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  would just fight through the injuries. Now, Gen
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  Z does not want to do that. So you come off like
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  a boomer. I'm surprised you're not drunk. You
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  know... I've taken a cortisone shot and the rest
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  of it was a broken ankle, so I don't have much
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  sympathy. All right, we didn't ask for your sympathy.
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  You're a drunken douchebag. For the hamstring.
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  You're stupid. But, you know, I know that they
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  protect their future. Yeah, so he's like bipolar,
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  because I am, so I can tell. He goes from one
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  second, oh, yeah, you know, I don't know much
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  about the injury, and then he trashes them, and
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  then just be a man and just trash them. I'm blaming
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  him for Shut up. You're a moron. Oh, yeah, man.
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  Last week, I was getting up at 4 a .m. to work
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  on the MJ morning show. You know what's going
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  on now? I've been sleeping in until like 10 .30.
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  It's like the polar opposite, man. It's kind
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  of weird. It's like when I was getting up for
• 12:14
  work. was when I was still sleeping. And now
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  when I get up in the morning, it's when I would
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  be done with work. It's very trippy, man. It's
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  like, damn, my days are shorter. I'm having a
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  midlife crisis. Attention, FM DJs, your morning
• 12:33
  show prep begins now. A sick person with a powerful
• 12:37
  tool. Welcome to Happy... Doors closing. Hi,
• 12:54
  this is Ryan Hoppy's mom and you're listening
• 12:57
  to Hoppy Hour. Welcome back to Hoppy Hour with
• 13:00
  Ryan Hoppy. Yes, now. What? Now, now, now, now.
• 13:09
  If I hit this button, boom, the whole program's
• 13:11
  gonna start. Okay, well, hit it. All right. The
• 13:29
  semen was so big. And now, something completely
• 13:33
  different. Hoppy Hour starts in 4, 3, 2, Hoppy,
• 13:39
  Hoppy, Hoppy. This is Hoppy Hour with Hoppy.
• 13:45
  Hoppy. Hoppy. Hoppy. Hoppy. Hoppy. Hoppy. Hoppy.
• 13:56
  Hoppy. Hoppy. This is Hoppy Hour. I am your host,
• 14:25
  Ryan Hoppy. Feeling pretty regulated on my meds.
• 14:29
  Regulators, stand up and take a conipin. I was
• 14:34
  waiting to use that one -liner. 856 -49 -Hobby.
• 14:39
  It's 856 -49 -467 -73. You can tweet at me at
• 14:45
  RyanHobbyRadio. It's time for Hoppy's Inbox,
• 14:50
  only on Hoppy Hour with Ryan Hoppy. Ah, my frickin'
• 14:53
  inbox blew up. My segment's about comedians Jeff
• 14:58
  Dye and Mark Norman. Who? People hear what they
• 15:01
  want to hear. I literally complimented them.
• 15:03
  I just said they're douchebags. I didn't say
• 15:05
  they're not funny. Mark Norman's a lot funnier
• 15:08
  than Jeff Dye, to be honest. Tell my comments
• 15:11
  on my video about Jeff Dye being mad he wasn't
• 15:13
  at the WrestleMania Kill Tony show. Ryan, I don't
• 15:16
  know who you are, but you are nothing more than
• 15:20
  a Red Bar Radio ripoff. That is the show that
• 15:24
  analyzes comedians. I love when people throw
• 15:28
  that out there. They're like, oh, you remind
• 15:29
  me of this radio show. Oh, heaven forbid. It's
• 15:32
  like saying, Anthony Edwards kind of reminds
• 15:34
  me of Kobe or Michael Jordan. Then I got a comment
• 15:38
  here on the Mike Norman video. Ryan, you just
• 15:43
  seem bitter. I'm not. I literally complimented
• 15:46
  them. I literally said they're funny. Just think
• 15:51
  it's hacky that you have to get actors to sit
• 15:53
  in the crowds and do your crowd work. Man, crowd
• 15:57
  work used to be so respectable where it was a
• 15:59
  little more genuine. Now it's like, damn. You
• 16:03
  gotta hire Asian people to make Asian people
• 16:05
  look bad? That's no good! Ah, man. Parasocial
• 16:14
  relationships with comedians is not ideal. That
• 16:20
  is not what you want. A parasocial relationship
• 16:24
  with a comedian is not the thing you are looking
• 16:27
  for. Mm -hmm. Trust me. You guys have parasocial
• 16:33
  relationships with comedians. I had relationships
• 16:37
  with comedians. Not like I was texting them,
• 16:39
  but I did have Bert's number. I did have Ralphie
• 16:43
  May's number. He was a little more genuine than
• 16:45
  Bert. Mm -hmm. Remember on Celtus Cruise 10 years
• 16:49
  ago, I was trying to flex, and I was drunk at
• 16:52
  the dinner table, and I said, hey, Ralphie. I
• 16:55
  said, Ralphie, would you want to come on my podcast
• 16:57
  sometime in front of everybody at the dinner
• 16:58
  table? He goes, fuck no, baby, baby. I'll buy
• 17:02
  you as many fucking beers as you want, but I
• 17:04
  ain't going on your shitty podcast. And you know
• 17:08
  what? That was more genuine than Bert Kreischer
• 17:11
  being like, I'm going to take you under my wing.
• 17:14
  I got you, Hoppy. I like your grind. Don't even
• 17:17
  say that. Literally ruined stand -up comedy for
• 17:21
  me. I have not been to a comedy show probably.
• 17:25
  I even have a hard time like, I don't know. Even
• 17:31
  like watching Nate Bargatze. It's like, yeah,
• 17:33
  my mom's like in love with Nate Bargatze. I know,
• 17:37
  he's cute. He also ditches radio shows when he
• 17:40
  doesn't need them to sell out comedy clubs anymore.
• 17:45
  That's what I despise most about comedians, and
• 17:47
  that's where Kelta's stupid, is Kelta thinks
• 17:50
  they're his friends. If Kelta loses that 100
• 17:54
  -watt radio station morning show job where he's
• 17:57
  in second place to MJ, if he loses that, you
• 18:01
  think the comedians are going to want to hang
• 18:02
  out with him on the lesser -listened -to podcast
• 18:06
  between him and Robert Kelly on Patreon? No,
• 18:08
  not at all. How did I learn that? I used to,
• 18:14
  when I was at the Bone, I got up, and the Bone
• 18:17
  is an FM radio station for guys. It's so edgy.
• 18:22
  They got billboards that say, our HR department
• 18:25
  would not, your HR department would not like
• 18:27
  us because they're harassing women. Get it? So
• 18:32
  1999. But what I'm saying is, when I left that
• 18:36
  job, comedians stopped hitting me up. Hey, can
• 18:39
  you slide into Kelton's DMs and try to get me
• 18:41
  on the show? Can't return. And all of a sudden,
• 18:43
  you never hear from them again. I retired from
• 18:47
  interviewing people in general. I don't like...
• 18:51
  You know what? It's not like you have to bring
• 18:54
  me along with your success. It's not like I need
• 18:57
  to be in a Bert Kreischer movie. But what I respected
• 19:01
  about Ralphie May was he wasn't trying to be
• 19:03
  my friend. That mother effer got me drunk on
• 19:06
  the boat. I remember we went to Puerto Rico on
• 19:10
  the cruise. We went to Puerto Rico and St. Thomas
• 19:14
  and Grand Turk. It was a good time. I have two
• 19:16
  memories. I remember we were walking up the stairs
• 19:18
  and Calto was having a hard time getting up and
• 19:21
  I actually felt bad. And he goes, never get bad
• 19:23
  knees and never get fat. That's kind of my plan.
• 19:26
  But now I have a bad back, so I can kind of relate.
• 19:31
  And then the other one was I was wearing like
• 19:33
  a gray T -shirt and the gray T -shirt light gray
• 19:37
  turned into dark gray because it was covered
• 19:38
  in sweat. Because like you think Florida's hot.
• 19:42
  Florida's got the type of heat where there might
• 19:43
  be a little breeze if you're standing in shade
• 19:46
  on a side of a building where the sun's not like
• 19:48
  almost at flashing where the sun's not like showing
• 19:51
  its rays on you. But in Puerto Rico, there is
• 19:55
  not a bit of a breeze. Not at all. And you're
• 19:58
  walking up hilly roads like it's San Francisco.
• 20:01
  And I came back and I was smoking a doobie with
• 20:04
  Ralphie May. It was actually Snoop Dogg's doobie.
• 20:07
  I cannot believe that happened. And I was like
• 20:09
  mad from hornblast stirs. And I went, Ralphie,
• 20:12
  you should have come to Puerto Rico. It was so
• 20:13
  much fun. He goes, fuck no, baby, baby. He goes,
• 20:17
  judging by your sweat, I would have died. Oh,
• 20:22
  I miss Ralphie, man. Oh, you're so cool. I don't
• 20:26
  know. I'm not trying to live in the past. I'm
• 20:27
  just reading those messages about comedians.
• 20:30
  I have comedian stories for days. I'm trying
• 20:32
  to think. Remember at the dinner table, Bert
• 20:34
  Kreischer was like, now my comedy career is blowing
• 20:38
  up. I've suddenly realized I have to go on these
• 20:40
  morning radio shows. And they're not like Mike.
• 20:43
  And then Mike's like, whoa, what morning shows
• 20:45
  are you going on? I don't know. I've got to go
• 20:49
  on this. I don't know why. What is this Grover's
• 20:51
  Morning Glory thing in Cleveland? And then I
• 20:55
  kind of described how I worked there. And Ralphie
• 20:57
  Mays was like, baby, baby, I love Roma and Douchey.
• 21:02
  And then he also was like, well, I also got to
• 21:04
  go on something called Free Beer and Hot Wings,
• 21:06
  which is actually a great show. When I was going
• 21:09
  to go on these Grover and Free Beer and Hot Wings.
• 21:11
  And then six months later, he's on Free Beer
• 21:14
  and Hot Wings and Rover Show. He's like, guys,
• 21:16
  I've respected you for so long. You guys are
• 21:20
  just such good radio hosts. I'm like, you didn't
• 21:22
  know who they were six months ago, did you? You
• 21:26
  ain't genuine. There ain't a genuine bone in
• 21:29
  your body. I saw this headline. And this is reverse
• 21:37
  sexism. Can you imagine? I mean, it does happen.
• 21:41
  When Andrew Tate and all these guys in the manosphere
• 21:45
  say, oh yeah, I don't want to be around women.
• 21:48
  They're annoying. And then the women go, that's
• 21:50
  sexist. But then you know what happens? Trisha
• 21:55
  Paytas. She's a little chubby. She went on Call
• 21:58
  Her Daddy and said this about men. I think I
• 22:04
  just like always hated men and I feel like Oh
• 22:06
  yeah. She done picked the right one. They hit
• 22:09
  it and quit it. I'm still kind of there, especially
• 22:12
  like giving birth. I just had like such bad experiences.
• 22:14
  I thought she was going to say giving something
• 22:16
  else. Men like not understanding postpartum,
• 22:18
  like just so. Oh, so because we don't understand
• 22:20
  the human body, because women don't really want
• 22:23
  to seem to explain it to us. Whenever I ask a
• 22:25
  woman a question about the body, they're like,
• 22:27
  didn't you pay attention in health class? Like,
• 22:29
  no, I was checking out my fifth grade crush.
• 22:32
  I just, and I just, all my life is just like
• 22:34
  any type of man. I've just like. I don't know.
• 22:36
  I feel like I wanted their validation. Yeah,
• 22:39
  it's called daddy issues. And they were all awful.
• 22:43
  Oh, because you chose the wrong ones? That would
• 22:47
  be like me saying, I've dated two cloud chasers,
• 22:49
  so all women are cloud chasers. All women are
• 22:52
  bisexual. I feel like I have still such a strong
• 22:56
  hatred. I think if there's anything to fix, it's
• 22:57
  like maybe my hatred towards men. Yeah, I would
• 23:00
  say so. I would say you need to get a male shrink
• 23:02
  and talk to him about that. That doesn't sound
• 23:06
  healthy. Not all men are bad, just like not all
• 23:10
  women are bad. I just think this idea that reverse
• 23:14
  sexism does not get called out. I think it's
• 23:19
  ridiculous. I think it's out of this world. Can
• 23:24
  you imagine if I said that? Oh, women are dumb.
• 23:28
  And like, it's like, it's not even just like
• 23:30
  me being this feminist. Men suck. You know, it's
• 23:33
  just. No, that is you being that. It's like when
• 23:36
  you talk to a racist goat. I'm not racist, but
• 23:39
  I got a lot of black friends. It's like, I really
• 23:42
  dislike them. And when I like. I dislike you
• 23:44
  too. You're a nine. To talk to a straight like.
• 23:47
  I would say you need a little ozempic too. This
• 23:50
  year, I really made a conscious effort to do
• 23:52
  only female podcasts. I thought she was the only
• 23:55
  fan, so that's where my mind's in the gutter.
• 23:57
  I don't want to talk to men. Well, maybe if you
• 23:59
  tried a man's podcast, that would help. You seem
• 24:03
  broken. Let me show you there. I don't know what
• 24:07
  it is, and that's obviously not right either.
• 24:09
  You want to be equal and not hate men. Yeah,
• 24:12
  but I get what you're saying. I think when you've
• 24:14
  been... You know what it is? She doesn't like
• 24:16
  how men look at her. No, I like her thickness.
• 24:22
  gives her more to love from behind. But, you
• 24:24
  know, she's probably mad at your typical incel
• 24:27
  and rather hook up with someone like Alex Cooper
• 24:29
  and it's like 70 pounds lighter. And like fucked
• 24:32
  over or wronged by men or even just as simple
• 24:34
  as like they don't understand women and there
• 24:37
  are some - Yeah, we don't because you don't want
• 24:38
  to explain to us how many times do you try to
• 24:43
  ask a woman what it's like being a woman and
• 24:45
  then they look at you. A man that when you're
• 24:49
  actually looking at them in the eyes, you're
• 24:50
  like, oh, you don't get what I'm talking about.
• 24:52
  Yeah, because you're not explaining it. We're
• 24:54
  stupid. We're here to procreate and break your
• 24:58
  hearts. And you're here to, you know, squirt
• 25:05
  out kids and break our hearts. So it's 50 -50.
• 25:09
  Here's an old clip. Actually, no, no, no, no,
• 25:12
  no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. It's a part of...
• 25:17
  of Alex Earl News. And I usually wait a minute
• 25:22
  to play one of my songs about the segments, but
• 25:26
  I'm feeling a little sleepy and I feel like I'm
• 25:29
  projecting sleepy energy onto you. So let's play
• 25:32
  Alex Earl is Annoying. Ron Hoppy on the air.
• 25:36
  Yeah, we back in this. Turn it up in your car.
• 25:41
  In your cubicle. Wherever you at. We got another
• 25:46
  one to talk about. We'll see you next time. There's
• 26:13
  a wannabe, call her daddy. Wannabe, wannabe.
• 26:17
  Trying to copy every topic, everybody. I'm blocked,
• 26:22
  I'm blocked. But it's hollow in the center. Throw
• 26:25
  one, throw twice. You forget about the dinner.
• 26:28
  Alex Pearl is a wannabe. That's tragic. Same
• 26:32
  script, same lines, all plastic. Hopping out,
• 26:35
  we'll call it out. That's a habit. We allergic
• 26:37
  to the fake. Yeah, we got a habit. Story. Time
• 26:42
  hit, but it's all prepped. Tears got off. Sorry
• 26:44
  about that. Every couple of years, new boy, same
• 26:47
  plot. Cue the ring light glow like we ain't seen
• 26:50
  this re -run four seasons ago. Says I'm real,
• 26:52
  I'm raw, I'm a hot mess queen. But the hair never
• 26:55
  moves, teeth way too clean. Every word, sound
• 26:58
  clip from a promo sheet. Whole life, one long,
• 27:01
  sponsor me, angry. Alex Earl is a wannabe, call
• 27:05
  her daddy. Wannabe, wannabe, wannabe. Trying
• 27:08
  to copy every topic, every baddie. Come on. All
• 27:12
  talk, all glock. But it's hollow in the center.
• 27:15
  You forget about a dinner. Alex Earl is a wannabe.
• 27:20
  8 -5 -6. 4 -9 -4 -6 -7 -7 -3. 8 -5 -6 -4 -9 -4
• 27:27
  -6 -7 -7 -3. 8 -5 -6 -4 -9 -4 -6 -7 -7 -3. 8
• 27:29
  -5 -6 -4 -9 -4 -6 -7 -7 -3. 8 -5 -6 -4 -9 -4
• 27:38
  -6 -7 -7 -3. Ryan, I'll be ready. I'll join you.
• 27:50
  Alex Earl, I hope I don't come off like an insult,
• 27:53
  like I don't like women. I think she's stupid.
• 27:58
  And her self -awareness is not very high. She
• 28:04
  thinks she's like this feministic object. She's
• 28:08
  definitely an object. Alright. What the hell
• 28:19
  going on? Oh, wow. Commercial for Gordon Ramsay.
• 28:24
  You got it going on, girl. How relevant. Showstopper.
• 28:28
  Nothing says 2006 like Gordon Ramsay. My three
• 28:32
  daughters are watching. Yeah, and they all hate
• 28:35
  you. Alright, here's a clip of Alex Earl. And
• 28:42
  Alex Cooper from a few years ago, they're doing
• 28:44
  what Alex Earl always does. You know what that
• 28:48
  is? Doing videos in front of a green light or
• 28:52
  the ring light camera, not the green light, the
• 28:55
  ring light camera. Putting on makeup, talking
• 28:58
  about men. Who like gives me no attention. I
• 29:05
  love it. Like if you text me or call me too much,
• 29:08
  like I will never speak to you again. That is
• 29:11
  a real thing. I've noticed that with any girl
• 29:16
  I've dated. If I start to realize that they like
• 29:20
  me and I like them and I start, you know, I care
• 29:24
  about you so much. You mean so much to me. They
• 29:28
  get so unattractive. But if you just play it
• 29:31
  cool, you know. And then they're like, every
• 29:34
  other guy is blowing up my DMs. But you gotta
• 29:40
  realize, every relationship ends. Now, hopefully
• 29:45
  it ends on a deathbed at age 85 after being together
• 29:49
  for 50 years. But the way that Gen Z, millennial
• 29:52
  relationships are going, I don't know if that
• 29:54
  would happen. So here's what I'm saying. There's
• 29:57
  going to be a time that girl ain't going to be
• 29:59
  around unless you die first. So what I'm saying
• 30:00
  is you cannot get that attached. I love a guy.
• 30:04
  I love it. I love how like five minutes. I love
• 30:07
  it. You're like, I'm obsessed when they treat
• 30:10
  me like absolute shit. And then. Also guys all
• 30:15
  in Miami taking notes right now. They're so similar.
• 30:17
  Alex and Alex. I'm being dramatic. Alex Earl
• 30:20
  spells it like a prostitute. I just don't like
• 30:23
  someone who is too mushy gushy and all over.
• 30:28
  Just give me some space because I don't know.
• 30:31
  Do you like horoscopes? I'll be honest. I read
• 30:36
  my horoscope. I don't take it seriously. I'm
• 30:39
  not like, oh, you're a Scorpio. I'm a Virgo.
• 30:42
  We can't date. But it gives me something to think
• 30:46
  about. I do read my co -star. Yeah, yeah, I do.
• 30:49
  I do. What are you? I'm a Sagittarius. What does
• 30:51
  that mean? That's what I'm talking about. Is
• 30:56
  when girls are like, yeah, I'm this. It's like,
• 31:01
  okay. It's like if they'll say, oh, a Sagittarius
• 31:05
  is hard to be around and has a hard time dating.
• 31:08
  Then the girls are like, oh yeah, so I'm going
• 31:11
  to be hard to be around because of my Sagittarius
• 31:14
  -ness. Not because of the fact that I'm a bad
• 31:16
  person to be around. Be very like independent
• 31:19
  and like, I don't like to be bothered. I don't
• 31:22
  like to feel like. Dating hogs are almost be
• 31:24
  tiring. Trapped. Smothered. If someone makes
• 31:28
  me feel smothered, I will run. So far away, no
• 31:31
  one will ever see me again. Oh, yeah, I can see
• 31:33
  her, like, giving you, you know, when you're
• 31:35
  talking to a girl on Snapchat, and they unfriend
• 31:38
  you, and you have the little X where their name
• 31:40
  was, and you're like, oh, my God, they're ghosting
• 31:43
  on me, and they're riding some other guy. I'm
• 31:46
  a Leo. I'm like, if I feel like I can dominate
• 31:48
  you. That's what I'm talking about, because Leos
• 31:52
  are known to be dominating. So she's like, I'm
• 31:55
  going to be a dominating person. Like, I will
• 31:57
  literally eat you alive. Oh, yeah. We'll never
• 32:01
  speak to you again. Get out of here with that
• 32:02
  little fucking bitch boy energy. Being married
• 32:06
  to her must be a real treat. Match your energy
• 32:10
  and test it. I love someone who flirted. Man,
• 32:16
  can you talk today, honey? Do we need to put
• 32:19
  another battery in the roboticness of you? Flirtily
• 32:22
  shits on me, kind. All right. I feel stupider
• 32:25
  for listening to that. Do you know what I mean?
• 32:26
  Not like too much, because there's guys in Miami
• 32:29
  who will go in on you and actually make you feel
• 32:33
  like the biggest piece of crap in your life.
• 32:35
  Right. Because that's their way of flirting.
• 32:38
  Yeah, well, her dad is married to a prostitute,
• 32:40
  so you know she's got raging daddy issues. But
• 32:44
  just a little bit of like a tease. All right.
• 32:48
  So there's them. And that was during the good
• 32:51
  times of the friendship of Alex Earl and Alex
• 32:55
  Cooper. I love that SNL skit where they talk
• 32:57
  about Alex Earl and Alex Cooper. I don't even
• 33:00
  know why we dislike each other. That was like
• 33:02
  the first time that SNL has made me laugh in
• 33:05
  a minute. It was a pretty good. Here, let's play
• 33:10
  a little bit of it. Well, the news is heavy this
• 33:14
  week, but here at Weekend Update, we aren't afraid
• 33:17
  to take on the tough subjects. So we're going
• 33:19
  to discuss their brewing feud. Our podcaster
• 33:22
  slash influencer, Alex Cooper, and influencer
• 33:25
  slash blogger, Alex Earl. What is up, Daddy Gay?
• 33:39
  Welcome, ladies. So for anyone not familiar,
• 33:42
  would you mind introducing yourselves? Yeah,
• 33:44
  of course. So I'm Alex with an E. And I'm Alex
• 33:47
  with an I. I'm pretty much Martha Stewart, if
• 33:51
  instead of teaching baking, she taught you the
• 33:53
  Glock 3000. And I'm basically Ellen, if she never
• 33:58
  came out. And I didn't really help me at all.
• 34:06
  But do you mind explaining what your feud is
• 34:08
  even about? Okay, so, like, do you know Biggie
• 34:10
  and Pac? Yes. Okay, well, we don't. Can you,
• 34:13
  like, explain them to us? What? Okay, so I'm
• 34:18
  going to say what happened between us. Okay,
• 34:20
  then say it. Say what you got to say, girl. On
• 34:24
  it. There's no NDA. Alex, say it. Okay, so I'm
• 34:27
  on it. It's literally coming out. I'm saying
• 34:28
  it like I'm saying it. That is brilliant. And
• 34:31
  here is real life Alex Earl. Let's see how much
• 34:33
  he sounds like the character on the SNL skit.
• 34:35
  Talking about, um... how she's trying to dodge
• 34:38
  talking about Alex Cooper on the Today Show.
• 34:40
  Because Alex made Sports Illustrated Swimsuit
• 34:45
  Edition. There's a lot of simps that'll be cranking
• 34:50
  it out to that. There's been this back and forth
• 34:53
  between you and another, the internet personality,
• 34:58
  a podcast. All right, Craig Melvin, say the freaking
• 35:00
  name or don't ask the question. Don't be beta.
• 35:03
  ...as well. Seems to be a bit of online beef
• 35:05
  there. What's actually happening? What's really
• 35:08
  going on? You know, well... I'm trying to keep
• 35:12
  things pretty positive. Oh, yeah. When I think
• 35:14
  of positive, I think of a girl that bangs her
• 35:17
  ex -boyfriend's teammate. You know, we don't
• 35:21
  have that much time here, honestly. I'm a hot
• 35:25
  piece of ass. No, it's like, I ruined such a
• 35:28
  good day. There you go. With something not so
• 35:32
  great. I don't like Craig Mahmoud. He's just
• 35:35
  like, just ask it. All right, let's see what
• 35:41
  we have here. What do we got here on Happy Hour
• 35:44
  with Ryan Harmon? All right, it's Adam 22 talking
• 35:48
  to some bust down. And she talks about how a
• 35:52
  guy properly dated her and her sister together.
• 35:55
  He's the only guy that was able to properly date
• 35:58
  me and my sister together. She sounds like a
• 36:00
  walking GED graduate. And he didn't try to get
• 36:03
  you guys pregnant. We had that discussion. But
• 36:04
  who wants brother cousins or sister cousins or
• 36:08
  daddy uncle? I don't know. Explain that to everybody.
• 36:10
  You guys were seeing him for how long? I want
• 36:12
  to say like a year and a half. I don't know.
• 36:16
  Her father is probably not around to be separate.
• 36:20
  I thought this was amazing. Nikki Glaser. I actually
• 36:27
  want to be careful and I don't want to play the
• 36:29
  clip because I don't want Netflix to delete my
• 36:31
  show. But the line was from Nikki Glaser. Tom,
• 36:35
  you're the best I ever played for too long. You
• 36:37
  retired, then came back, then retired. I get
• 36:40
  it. It's hard to walk away from something that
• 36:42
  isn't your pregnant girlfriend. Again, Nikki
• 36:46
  Glaser would say it better, but you got to be
• 36:47
  careful with the copyright. So, Stephen Colbert
• 36:52
  on his final week was interviewing some hottie
• 36:56
  from CNN and this happened. I know you guys are
• 36:59
  objective over there that you just report the
• 37:01
  news as it is. No, I know. CNN makes it. Is that
• 37:05
  supposed to be a lab lie? It wasn't supposed
• 37:07
  to be, but I guess it is. God, we're not going
• 37:11
  to miss you. You're a loser! He is so unlikeable,
• 37:16
  Dan. You're only funny when you're playing a
• 37:19
  character. Because deep down, you're a boring
• 37:22
  Roman Catholic that thinks you're better than
• 37:24
  Trump. Here's a woman talking about the importance
• 37:30
  of sex during a marriage. If your partner can
• 37:33
  go months without having sex with you, that is
• 37:36
  a serious sign that they do not love you anymore.
• 37:39
  That is a very good point. At the end of my last
• 37:43
  three, well, I had two and a half relationships.
• 37:45
  I had one two -year situation -ship. And then
• 37:48
  I had two serious girlfriends. I've had a decent
• 37:53
  amount. And whenever the relationship was about
• 37:56
  to end, there was this thing that happened where
• 38:00
  we would stop begging. When somebody truly loves
• 38:06
  you, they naturally desire you, not out of obligation,
• 38:10
  but from genuine attraction and impulse to be
• 38:13
  close to you. There's research that supports
• 38:15
  it. Studies show that sexual frequency is strongly
• 38:18
  linked to relationship satisfaction. Couples
• 38:21
  who report regular intimacy tend to have higher
• 38:24
  emotional closeness and lower rates of breakup.
• 38:28
  Oxytocin released during sex strengthens. Oxytocin's
• 38:31
  scary because that is what makes you attracted
• 38:34
  to the girl. And then if you break up, that's
• 38:36
  what happens where you like, I'm not saying you
• 38:39
  don't miss them, but that is the dangerous part
• 38:42
  about it. I mean, I don't know. That's dangerous
• 38:45
  for men because women can just move on and go
• 38:50
  ride. Another guy, but us, we covet it. No good.
• 38:57
  Bonding and feelings of connection. Without it,
• 39:00
  that... I mean, you're literally connected. The
• 39:02
  person's... You know, you're inside of the person.
• 39:04
  Closeness, it weakens over time. Relationships
• 39:07
  do go through cycles. I understand that. But
• 39:09
  prolonged lack of intimacy usually means that
• 39:12
  one has completed its own. That's very good.
• 39:15
  Sometimes those... Twitter talking about dating.
• 39:19
  I don't agree. But that is 100 % spot on. Clavicular
• 39:23
  was shocked after he found out the woman, when
• 39:28
  he found out how old the woman who was doing
• 39:30
  his skin care was. How old are you? He's putting
• 39:44
  on the selfie camera to see how old she is. Like,
• 39:48
  maybe... That's 27. Thank you. I'm 29. 39. She
• 39:58
  didn't look 27. He's trying to get laid. That's
• 40:02
  that move when you're at like a smoker bar and
• 40:04
  there's like a hot milk and she's like kind of
• 40:07
  in you. This has happened before. And she's like,
• 40:09
  how old do you think I am? And I'm like 29. And
• 40:12
  she clearly likes 43. again the sexist podcast
• 40:17
  against men caller daddy has another clip going
• 40:20
  viral of hillary duff talking about a relationship
• 40:22
  so i think we had like a date maybe a few days
• 40:26
  after a week after something and it was great
• 40:29
  but he was so nice to me and i remember being
• 40:31
  like like after a few times we had hung out i
• 40:35
  was like he's just so nice i am again if you
• 40:40
  didn't learn something from this show Girls do
• 40:43
  not like nice girls. That's not really a thing.
• 40:49
  He thought it was like almost a red flag that
• 40:51
  he was too nice. I think I was just like not
• 40:54
  ready to accept all of that yet. I was like coming
• 40:57
  out of that like a long relationship, a divorce.
• 41:01
  Like I was just like chaotic. Yeah, divorces
• 41:05
  will mess up women. How does it mess them up?
• 41:09
  Because then they start thinking every guy is
• 41:11
  like their ex. And then the problem is, I'm going
• 41:15
  to teach you guys something on there. Listen
• 41:18
  to how the previous relationship between the
• 41:20
  man and the woman happened. And here's what I
• 41:23
  mean by that. If she ends the relationship and
• 41:27
  they're on okay terms and whatever, that's fine.
• 41:30
  But if the relationship ended with them hating
• 41:33
  each other, unfortunately. That's all that's
• 41:38
  going to end for you. I think I needed some chaos
• 41:42
  first. Yes, meeting a nice guy that's actually
• 41:44
  going to treat you well. You're like, wait, can
• 41:46
  you pause for two seconds? I'm learning a lot
• 41:50
  today about women. I'm just going to keep giving
• 41:53
  women space and let them come to me and I'll
• 41:55
  sit around going, hey! Why aren't you hitting
• 41:58
  me up? Alright. Today in Neon News. Neon felt
• 42:08
  bad after Iggy Azalea said he's the only one
• 42:12
  that wished her happy birthday or happy Mother's
• 42:14
  Day. I didn't even know Iggy was a mom. Oh, my
• 42:18
  God. I just realized something. What? I forgot
• 42:22
  to text you yesterday. Happy Mother's Day. Well,
• 42:26
  thank you. You know what? Don't even feel bad.
• 42:30
  God, he's so beta. I just want to hug Neon and
• 42:33
  be like, you're so beta. I know you got like
• 42:36
  15 million more dollars than me and you're a
• 42:40
  lot more famous than me, but I've been through
• 42:42
  it with women. You're doing too much. My brother
• 42:47
  doesn't text me that. My mom doesn't text me
• 42:48
  that. Oh, so it would have been weird. Okay,
• 42:50
  okay, okay. You would have literally have been
• 42:52
  the only person that sent me a text. All right.
• 42:56
  He is just... It's just that high school during
• 42:59
  COVID thing, man. They're just confused. Ah,
• 43:03
  this is going to be spicy. NBA star, Sophie Cunningham.
• 43:09
  This is Angel Reese for posting Instagram stories
• 43:12
  of her boyfriend, Wendell Carter, dunking on
• 43:14
  her ex, Jalen Duren. I think we all know that
• 43:18
  Angel Reese would prefer one in the front and
• 43:24
  one in the back. Let's go. What's going on, Kev?
• 43:32
  Tell us more news. This one is kind of crazy,
• 43:34
  but the most fun one, in my opinion, I can't
• 43:36
  wait to show you this graphic. Fun is insane.
• 43:39
  Fun is insane. So essentially, Selfie cunning,
• 43:43
  I'm still not. Jalen Duren, Wendell Carter Jr.,
• 43:47
  they're facing each other in the playoffs right
• 43:49
  now, Magic Pistons. Wendell Carter Jr. is dating
• 43:52
  Angel, is dating Angel Reese. Oh, yeah. Who isn't
• 43:57
  dead, Angel? Who is Jalen Duren's ex. So now
• 44:01
  these two dudes are playing each other. They're
• 44:03
  guarding each other. And Jalen Duren averaged
• 44:05
  20 and 10 in the regular season. He's going to
• 44:07
  make the All -NBA team. He's an all -star. He's
• 44:09
  averaging 10 and 8 now. He's matched up against
• 44:12
  Angel Reese's current boyfriend. He's the ex.
• 44:15
  They're asking my brothers. So that kind of weird
• 44:25
  dynamic there is like absolutely crushing his
• 44:28
  game on a mental level. And it's like, is it
• 44:30
  is it real? I guess he came out and said something
• 44:32
  that that's why. So there's like, you know, Jalen
• 44:36
  Duren and Angel were like... Man, can we hear
• 44:38
  more from Sophie Cunningham? Can Sophie Cunningham
• 44:40
  bring prep so she knows what she's talking about
• 44:43
  so we don't have to hear from this guy on Sophie
• 44:44
  Cunningham's podcast? Dating on the low, but
• 44:47
  like, you know, Snap and Instagram, you can tell
• 44:48
  they're in the same location. That was a few
• 44:50
  months ago. Now she's very publicly dating Wendell
• 44:52
  Carter Jr. And every time... I wonder if they
• 44:55
  put on Ice Age while they're having sex with
• 44:57
  Angel Reese. Jalen Duren gets dunked on. Angel
• 44:59
  Reese is putting it on her story. What a brat.
• 45:01
  You're a dirty rotten moron. That's... I couldn't
• 45:03
  handle winning in Chicago because you're a loser.
• 45:07
  And you'll always live in the shadows. You know,
• 45:12
  the woman that is known as Kaylin Clark. So she's
• 45:16
  like really going, going after him here, which
• 45:19
  is kind of crazy. All right. Wow. Let's help.
• 45:22
  Jesus Christ. Tucker Carlson says all the porn
• 45:30
  sites are controlled by the government. Fine.
• 45:35
  Felt good last night when I got my rocks off
• 45:37
  because I was lonely. The government can see
• 45:40
  that I'm in the milfs. Why? And I honestly think
• 45:48
  that one of the biggest problems, sorry to shock
• 45:51
  your viewers, is pornography on the internet.
• 45:53
  And I want to say specifically, people are like,
• 45:55
  oh, pornography is so bad. I'm talking about
• 45:57
  a specific thing. Hey, sleep with my wife pornography,
• 46:00
  which is pushed by the pornography companies.
• 46:02
  Hell yeah. That means Tucker's into it if he's
• 46:05
  bringing it up. If you think about that for a
• 46:08
  second, first of all, all the porn sites are
• 46:10
  controlled by governments and intel agencies.
• 46:12
  So nothing you go to on a porn site, you know,
• 46:14
  it's all being stored and will be used against
• 46:15
  you if necessary. Okay. Ryan, why'd you watch
• 46:20
  the Lisa Hand video for 25 minutes? Okay, Congress.
• 46:23
  People don't know that. That's a fact. Okay,
• 46:25
  including the camera on your phone. Whoa, wise
• 46:27
  it up, boys. Okay, so that's just a fact, okay?
• 46:30
  All right. He's weird, dude. I love how he's
• 46:34
  trying to walk back how MAGA he was. Like, shut
• 46:36
  up, dude. Chris Brown shares a PSA after the
• 46:41
  website Pitchfork scored Chris Brown's album,
• 46:44
  the Brown album, 1 .3. Team Breezy. I know people
• 46:51
  want me to get on here and, you know. Say some
• 46:55
  sad shit, but fuck that. We kicking their ass,
• 46:59
  god damn it. We ain't letting up. I'm going to
• 47:01
  keep my foot on their neck, and we ain't stopping.
• 47:04
  It's frightening knowing that he's a woman beater.
• 47:06
  You hear me? We doing this, motherfucker. Tour.
• 47:09
  More shit to come. I'm not going to tell you
• 47:11
  what's more to come, but it's coming. All right,
• 47:14
  there you go. Yeah, he claims he doesn't care
• 47:16
  about what they say, yet he made a video about
• 47:18
  it, so I think he does. Uh... So I guess Alabama
• 47:23
  Barker, but Neon was at the club. And Alabama
• 47:31
  Barker started saying freaky things to him on
• 47:35
  the phone. I can't play that because they're
• 47:45
  playing YOLO in the background. Damn old Combine.
• 47:51
  D4VD, David appeared in court. He just looks
• 47:57
  like a murderer. Jamie Foxx is going to have
• 48:00
  a baby. Well, I guess he's having a baby, but
• 48:03
  his girl is pregnant. But he's going to be a
• 48:05
  father. Let me see here. Kim Kardashian was awarded
• 48:11
  money from the stupid lawsuit that guy had against
• 48:14
  her. I don't feel like talking about Kash Patel
• 48:19
  at this second. We got some Tiffany Haddish news.
• 48:26
  Here is her response to the George Floyd joke
• 48:30
  at the roast. Here's the thing. If it was all
• 48:33
  jokes about George Floyd, that's fine. But they
• 48:36
  literally had a joke about Charlie Kirk. Nothing
• 48:38
  was off the table. And here's Tiffany Haddish's
• 48:41
  response to it. Shut up. Do you have like 30
• 48:52
  seconds to chat really quick? Yeah. So talking
• 48:54
  about Kevin Hart roast, right? Yes, it was so
• 48:56
  much fun. So Lonnie Love didn't think so. Lonnie
• 48:59
  Love was like, you know what? It's exhausting.
• 49:00
  Shut up, Lonnie. You're a hag. The worst thing
• 49:03
  is edgy. Specifically about the George Floyd
• 49:06
  joke. What are you thinking? Is it just comedy?
• 49:09
  Should they have been a little less? I think
• 49:13
  it should have been shorter. The show was too
• 49:14
  long. I mean, I was sitting there the whole time
• 49:18
  I had to pee. I didn't hear the George Floyd
• 49:20
  joke because I had to pee so bad. So, yeah, I
• 49:25
  was a glorified seat filler. And I was tired.
• 49:29
  Yeah, it was three hours. Well, also, I mean,
• 49:32
  Lonnie and other people were like, oh, maybe
• 49:33
  it was a little too racially motivated. What
• 49:36
  do you think? As far as like the jokes. Is this
• 49:39
  just comedy? Or are people... Just end with,
• 49:45
  is this just comedy or not? Why do the paparazzi
• 49:48
  talk so much when you're interviewing? You could
• 49:52
  have got seven more seconds of a soundbite. Taking
• 49:54
  it too seriously. Is this all comedians saying
• 49:57
  it that wasn't invited? She walks away. And she
• 50:04
  wants her DUI case dropped because she's having
• 50:06
  a hard time because she got a DUI four years
• 50:08
  ago. She's having a hard time traveling the world
• 50:10
  because the Georgia court. keeps, what do you
• 50:14
  call it? The Georgia court keeps pushing the
• 50:17
  trial back. I still cannot believe that this
• 50:20
  guy has this much money. Byron Allen from Comics
• 50:23
  Unleashed. Even, what's his name, says that they're
• 50:27
  not unleashed. There's that line from Norm MacDonald
• 50:29
  that there's nothing unleashed about Comics Unleashed.
• 50:31
  You know, Byron Allen, I didn't know he's like
• 50:33
  a billionaire. Well, he just bought BuzzFeed,
• 50:36
  and he's buying everything. What do we got here?
• 50:40
  856. 49 happy. Michelle Obama is looking thin
• 50:44
  as people are concerned about their marriage.
• 50:47
  Yeah, when she said they didn't talk while he
• 50:50
  was in the White House, yeah, that's not good.
• 50:56
  Wendy's quietly closed 300 locations. They closed
• 50:59
  the one on 4th Street that was actually good,
• 51:02
  but it was farther down the road. The other one
• 51:04
  sucks. We ain't got no chicken. It's 9 p .m.
• 51:08
  You got two more hours of work. Shut up. Spencer
• 51:13
  Pratt is running for the mayor of LA. I first
• 51:16
  thought it was kind of cool, but then I thought,
• 51:17
  I was like, it kind of reminds me of Trump, like
• 51:19
  an annoying reality star. So there was that video
• 51:23
  of the dog poop smear at Gordon Ramsay's restaurant.
• 51:29
  MJ talked about this last week if you were listening
• 51:31
  to the MJ show. And Gordon Ramsay had a response
• 51:36
  about it. I mean, it wasn't like the woman was,
• 51:40
  Talking about it outside of it, she had video
• 51:42
  proof. So here's how Gordon Ramsay is going to
• 51:46
  defend his restaurant. Thank you. I love you.
• 51:50
  So I want to ask you, did you ever get a chance
• 51:52
  to address... I want to ax you. I want to ask
• 51:55
  you, did you ever get a chance to address that
• 51:57
  TikToker that had the issue with the dog inside
• 51:59
  the shop? What we have seen is the CCTV footage
• 52:02
  and under no circumstances did that dog do a
• 52:04
  pee or... Well, a dog shouldn't be there. And
• 52:07
  number two, it had the little pad. Jesus Christ,
• 52:11
  stop lying to us. We're not stupid, dude. So,
• 52:13
  over -exaggerated, as always, clickbait, but
• 52:16
  thank you for your honesty. Fuck you, dude. You're
• 52:18
  a bitch, dude. Annoying. Benny Blanco almost
• 52:24
  stabbed his friend on his podcast. Oh, he's so
• 52:27
  silly. Hayden Panettiere's abusive act supports
• 52:31
  her with the memoir where she wrote about how
• 52:34
  he was abusive. Yeah. Pete Davidson... Said grandpa
• 52:40
  caught him accidentally watching gay porn. And
• 52:43
  people were offended by this joke. You do realize
• 52:46
  he's just saying things to rile you up. I don't
• 52:50
  think people understand comedy. Man, we would
• 52:54
  not have survived in the Don Rickles era. All
• 52:59
  right. Here's Pete Davidson. It was said Lemon
• 53:06
  Party. I clicked it. And it was horrible. It's
• 53:08
  a video of six 70 -year -old men, white guys,
• 53:14
  blowing each other to the Andy Griffith theme
• 53:18
  song. And I watched the whole thing. Because
• 53:32
  I was eight. And I was like, what happens? One
• 53:37
  night, I'm watching the K -Park girl, and I get
• 53:41
  set in a party, and I'm watching it, and I'm
• 53:43
  trying to click out of it. And I hear my grandpa
• 53:46
  get home from the Knights of Columbus. He starts
• 53:49
  coming downstairs. I freak out. I shut off the
• 53:53
  screen, and I turn off the volume. But like an
• 53:56
  idiot, I just sat there. He gets downstairs.
• 53:59
  He goes, what are you watching? I go, nothing.
• 54:03
  He goes, come on. Is it a favorite girl? I go,
• 54:08
  that's gross. Because your favorite girl should
• 54:11
  be grandma. He goes, good. Turn it on. I go,
• 54:17
  no. He goes, turn it on. I go, no. He goes, remember
• 54:21
  what grandpa said? Be very surprised what grandpa
• 54:24
  likes. I was like, I don't think you're going
• 54:26
  to like this one. Because it looks like the worst
• 54:31
  night at the Knights of Columbus ever. He grabs
• 54:38
  my neck. He squeezes it. I cum a little. All
• 54:43
  right, hang on. Yeah, he seems to be going off
• 54:46
  the deep end. I really think he thought it was
• 54:48
  going to work with his current baby mama that
• 54:49
  he had a kid with. All right. 856. 49 hobby.
• 54:58
  856. 494 -6773. All right. That was the opening
• 55:03
  segment. We'll all be right back on Hoppy Hour.
• 55:06
  We got much more to get into. Hang on. Hoppy
• 55:09
  Hour. Hoppy Hour. It's time for Hoppy in the
• 55:18
  morning. RyanHoppyRadio .com. Hoppy Hour will
• 55:24
  be right back. You probably had Taco Bell before.
• 55:27
  Whatever. As a reminder, if you don't feel like
• 55:40
  listening to this next song, you can skip over
• 55:43
  it. But Ryan Hoppy of Hoppy Hour takes pride
• 55:45
  in his selection, so stick around, folks. Don't
• 55:49
  worry, Fresno. Hoppy Hour will be right back.
• 55:53
  Here's Shreddy Gibbs with Bobblehead. I always
• 56:01
  do this. I have frickin' YouTube muted. God damn
• 56:04
  it. Bitch, I bobblehead with it, whips it high
• 56:49
  cause I get my spinach Get my guap and the shit
• 56:51
  don't stop with a Glasgow pop and the boy shop
• 56:53
  chickens Freddy got chevys on 24 inches, I'm
• 56:56
  out to crush on my colors on sixes Niggas gon'
• 56:58
  hate when I come on them boots, I guess I'ma
• 56:59
  crank up my suspension Bet you they bang this
• 57:02
  off in they system, let that shit bump, let you
• 57:04
  the trunk explode I'm livin' the way that I'm
• 57:06
  livin', inheritance pippin', I really don't stunt
• 57:07
  for hoes I jump for hoes, get dough at the end
• 57:10
  of the month from hoes And she lickin' my sack
• 57:12
  in the lack And you blazin' a plus, my hoes,
• 57:14
  I'm just a co Adjust my flows with ease on the
• 57:17
  track Bet you'd rather see a nigga rich If I'm
• 57:19
  broke, I'ma get them G's off your lack Pop your
• 57:21
  collar, bow my dollars Go stay proper, and you
• 57:24
  know that Hoes You talkin' papa about that guava,
• 57:27
  you can't show that hoe Four shots to the head,
• 57:29
  four shots to the chin, and it's off to the street
• 57:31
  side, go I take a puff off of my bun and then
• 57:34
  I lean back, slow Four shots to the head, four
• 57:37
  shots to the chin, and it's off to the street
• 57:38
  side, go I take a puff off of my bun and then
• 57:41
  I lean back, slow Cause bitch, I bobblehead with
• 57:44
  it, bitch, I bobblehead with it Bitch, I b -b
• 57:47
  -b -b -b -b -b -b -bobblehead with it Bitch,
• 57:50
  I bobblehead with it, bitch, I bobblehead with
• 57:53
  it Bitch, I b -b -b -b -b -b -b -b -b -b -bobblehead
• 57:55
  with it Oh, you talkin' poppa about that poppa,
• 58:02
  you can't show that Oh, honey, I will know that
• 58:05
  Oh, oh, that poppa will know that Oh, oh, you
• 58:07
  talkin' poppa about that poppa, you can't show
• 58:10
  that Hey, hey, hey, goddamnit, I'm high as hell
• 58:13
  Goddamnit, I'm fly as hell Doin' all that stunt
• 58:16
  makin' songs about money When I see a nigga,
• 58:17
  I can't tell Nigga gettin' that cash for real
• 58:20
  Three nigga poppin' them tags for real Nigga
• 58:22
  gettin' that dough when you know I'm finna blow
• 58:24
  You call a nigga there for real Give a new mate,
• 58:26
  put your hoe, blow Gritch out the motherfuckers
• 58:36
  We'll be right back. I bobblehead with it, bitch,
• 59:00
  I bobblehead with it I bobblehead with it, bitch,
• 59:04
  I bobblehead with it Money we blow that, oh,
• 59:08
  that's how we blow that Oh, you talkin' pop about
• 59:11
  that, why, but you can't show that Oh, money
• 59:14
  we blow that, oh, oh, that's how we blow that
• 59:16
  Oh, you talkin' pop about that, why, but you
• 59:19
  can't show that Oh, hey, hey, hey Gibbs, this
• 59:24
  shit right here, my nigga This shit right here
• 59:27
  make you wanna walk up on me right now. Bring
• 59:29
  your head all the way back. And do the bobblehead
• 59:32
  on that hoe. You know what I'm talking about?
• 59:34
  But if we blow that hoe, that's how we blow that
• 59:38
  hoe. You talking pop about that hoe, but you
• 59:40
  can't show that hoe. You talking pop about that
• 59:47
  hoe, but you can't show that hoe. But if we blow
• 59:50
  that hoe, that's how we blow that hoe. You talking
• 59:53
  pop about that hoe. You talk and bop about that
• 1:00:01
  bop, but you can't show that. I love me a girl
• 1:00:20
  that has a bobble head. It gives me a lot of
• 1:00:23
  pleasure. And now... Back to the Hoppy Hour with
• 1:00:27
  Ryan Hoppy on Fresno's Hot 97 .7. Hey, I'm Scott
• 1:00:34
  Burrell and you're listening to Hoppy Hour with
• 1:00:36
  my boy Ryan Hoppy. You're shaking up with my
• 1:00:41
  boy Ryan Hoppy on Hoppy Hour. It's time to shake
• 1:00:45
  it up on Hoppy Hour. He had daddy issues and
• 1:00:49
  is attracted to women with them. Welcome back
• 1:00:52
  to Hoppy Hour with Ryan Hoppy. People often argue
• 1:00:55
  over Android versus iPhones. But the real debate
• 1:00:59
  should be middle -aged Gen X morning shows versus
• 1:01:01
  Hoppy Hour. Guess who wins? We will let you decide.
• 1:01:05
  Welcome back to Hoppy Hour with Ryan Hoppy. Triggering
• 1:01:09
  middle -aged dudes since 2012, this is Hoppy
• 1:01:12
  Hour with Ryan Hoppy. Welcome to Hoppy Hour with
• 1:01:21
  Ryan Hoppy. Something completely different. Door
• 1:01:31
  is closing. Door is closing. Happy hour. Happy
• 1:02:17
  hour. Ladies and gentlemen, here it is. The most
• 1:02:26
  listened to radio show on the planet. And the
• 1:02:29
  other stations are tuned in too. Bartender, fill
• 1:03:00
  my glass. I came to dance, not watch some famous
• 1:03:07
  dude crash. DJ, turn it up. I'm trying. DJ, turn
• 1:03:22
  it up. Outro Music I don't want to be that guy
• 1:04:40
  Just know I 8 -5 -6. 4 -9 -8. It's 8 -5 -6. 4
• 1:05:54
  -9 -4 -6 -7 -7 -3. You're tweeting me. All right.
• 1:05:59
  And happy radio. All right. What's going on with
• 1:06:02
  this moron? Mm -hmm. Happy Hot Topic. That is
• 1:06:16
  load. Please? Can this video load? I should just
• 1:06:23
  do this for the next two hours. Load. There's
• 1:06:26
  news today in Tiger Woods' DUI case. The state's
• 1:06:29
  motion is granted. A Florida judge ruled prosecutors
• 1:06:32
  will have access to Tiger's prescription drug
• 1:06:35
  records. Oh, yeah. Following his rollover crash.
• 1:06:39
  I think he is not realizing how lucky he is.
• 1:06:43
  He's stuck. He said a few, yes. More like 12.
• 1:07:03
  Yeah, when you have your car tipped to the side
• 1:07:07
  and you're putting everyone else's life on the
• 1:07:08
  line on the road. No, it's not how it's going
• 1:07:12
  to work. The judge agreed no drug details could
• 1:07:15
  be released to the public. There you freaking
• 1:07:18
  go. What's going on with these morons? Today
• 1:07:23
  on TMZ. Okay, Big Rose last night. Pete Davidson
• 1:07:28
  railed on Kanye West. It was part of his comments
• 1:07:34
  about Tony Hinchcliffe. I was in a beef with
• 1:07:36
  Kanye, so I've taken shots from better gay Nazis.
• 1:07:40
  It was two hours and 51 minutes of just the most
• 1:07:43
  brutal jokes to every single person. Yeah, that's
• 1:07:46
  how a roast works. They started talking about
• 1:07:49
  Cheryl Underwood's husband's suicide. First of
• 1:07:54
  all, she approved of it. And second of all, it's
• 1:07:57
  a fucking roast. What happened with this world?
• 1:08:00
  Why did we get so sad? Making fun of Pete's dad
• 1:08:04
  dying on 9 -11. Making fun of Charlie Clark,
• 1:08:07
  George Floyd. Ah, it's a roust. Wait, but what
• 1:08:11
  can we use here? Benedict Cumberbatch got into
• 1:08:16
  a heated argument with a fellow biker. You hear
• 1:08:23
  the guy tell Benedict he was blowing red lights.
• 1:08:26
  It really is awful when these Guys, blow red
• 1:08:29
  lights. Oh, yeah! All these shows are all the
• 1:08:56
  same, just vapid people. At least Jersey Shore
• 1:08:59
  is funny. They're basically taking every chick
• 1:09:02
  that's cheated on and giving them a Love Island
• 1:09:04
  hosting gig. But Wes was out doing it up at a
• 1:09:07
  wedding and not with Amanda. He patted her on
• 1:09:10
  the head. Aye, he's kissing her. Mmm. Some guy
• 1:09:12
  pats you on the head, you're not having sex with
• 1:09:14
  them. Uh, speak for yourself. Ah, tip of the
• 1:09:18
  head. We got Flavor Flav at LAX. I got the whole
• 1:09:23
  United States Olympic women's hockey team. I
• 1:09:27
  know no one's going to remember this, but remember
• 1:09:28
  the short -lived show we had on, I think it was
• 1:09:31
  My Network TV, Under One Roof? That was an interesting
• 1:09:34
  show. Mm -hmm. Coming to Vegas. He's really become
• 1:09:39
  the champion of women's sports. I bet on the
• 1:09:41
  WNBA this weekend, and I lost by half a point.
• 1:09:44
  How do you lose by half a point? What are you,
• 1:09:46
  what are you, I'm dying. You're not going to
• 1:09:48
  say that. If I were betting on this, I'd say
• 1:09:50
  it's a period joke. Oh my God! Yeah, they're
• 1:09:54
  on their time of the month. That's why they're
• 1:09:56
  at nine! I'm kidding, kind of. Mm -hmm. Cody
• 1:10:02
  Simpson is facing a hemorrhage on his vocal cord.
• 1:10:07
  Sharing this photo of what looks like a doctor's
• 1:10:09
  office on Instagram May 11th. Is that music in
• 1:10:12
  the background that, like, alarm that you always
• 1:10:14
  sleep through on your iPhone? Cody writes, Hey
• 1:10:19
  guys, I originally thought I could keep this
• 1:10:21
  private, but it's come time I share what I've
• 1:10:23
  been going through. Just over a month ago, we
• 1:10:25
  discovered a serious hemorrhage on one of my
• 1:10:27
  vocal cords. It occurred due to my overzealousness
• 1:10:30
  in the studio. Singing through a sinus infection,
• 1:10:32
  I didn't know I had. Yeah, you know, I'll be
• 1:10:35
  honest, sometimes on the show I can be loud.
• 1:10:37
  This just in. And sometimes, like that won't
• 1:10:41
  help, my throat will be sore. Cody says he initially
• 1:10:44
  assumed it was fatigue. Alright, well. Hope it
• 1:10:47
  all works out for you, kiddo. I'll buy your dreams
• 1:10:50
  come true. Load. Can this load? Why is it not
• 1:11:00
  loading? Load. Hello? Can this load? All right,
• 1:11:07
  just want to get out of here. There's a new adventure
• 1:11:08
  on the way. Sebastian Stan and Annabelle Wallace
• 1:11:12
  are expecting their first baby together. Oh,
• 1:11:14
  that's so cute. According to Deadline. And though
• 1:11:19
  the actor didn't share details about their impending
• 1:11:22
  arrival, Sebastian did tell the outlet in an
• 1:11:25
  interview published May 12th, quote, I want to
• 1:11:27
  be a good dad. And that's ironing. When you're
• 1:11:30
  putting out that energy, that's good. No! Happy
• 1:11:33
  hot topic! Katy Perry reveals her love for Josh
• 1:11:37
  Groban is never really over. Yeah, Josh Groban
• 1:11:41
  seems like he's the dude that's ironing the friends
• 1:11:44
  up. In a May 11th TikTok, Katy appears on screen
• 1:11:47
  over a screenshot announcing Josh and Natalie
• 1:11:50
  McQueen's engagement. Wow, she's such a hag,
• 1:11:53
  Katy Perry. Has to make everything about her.
• 1:11:57
  You suck. Which occurred in April after three
• 1:12:01
  years of dating. Before she pours herself a full
• 1:12:05
  glass of a beverage. Man, she must have really
• 1:12:08
  realized she messed up with him. Load. The Voice
• 1:12:14
  has a new coach in town, or should we say queen?
• 1:12:18
  Queen Latifah is... Oh, yeah! She's going to
• 1:12:22
  be... Joining the singing competition as a coach
• 1:12:25
  for season 30, alongside previously announced
• 1:12:28
  country star Riley Greene, also making his debut,
• 1:12:32
  and Kelly Clarkson and Adam Levine. While the
• 1:12:36
  Oscar -nominated Chicago star is better known
• 1:12:38
  for her acting skills of late, she is also a
• 1:12:41
  Grammy -winning musician. All right, yeah. She
• 1:12:45
  does a little bit of everything. A little bit
• 1:12:48
  of everything. Happy Hot Topic! Christopher Nolan
• 1:12:53
  reveals why he cast Travis Scott in The Odyssey.
• 1:12:56
  Oh, yeah. For attention? Because then there's
• 1:13:00
  news reports like this talking about it? The
• 1:13:02
  director shares the reasoning behind Travis Scott's
• 1:13:05
  casting as a bard in his upcoming film The Odyssey,
• 1:13:08
  which premieres in theaters July 17th. Christopher
• 1:13:11
  explains to Time in an interview published on
• 1:13:14
  May 12th, I cast him because I wanted to nod
• 1:13:16
  towards the idea that this story has been handed
• 1:13:19
  down as oral poetry, which is analogous to rap.
• 1:13:22
  While Travis, who shares kids Stormy and Air
• 1:13:25
  with ex Kylie Jenner, has not said much about
• 1:13:28
  his appearance in the new film, he did have a
• 1:13:30
  steam -sealing moment. the trailer which was
• 1:13:32
  released in january and the rapper is no stranger
• 1:13:36
  to the screen as he has had small roles in the
• 1:13:39
  tv special trolls holiday in harmony and the
• 1:13:41
  film aggro drift though the upcoming film marks
• 1:13:45
  his first on -screen role in a christopher nolan
• 1:13:47
  project he previously made a song of course it's
• 1:13:50
  his first oh wait wait a song for the oscar winners
• 1:13:53
  2020 ah so he has a previous relationship with
• 1:13:55
  him That is what that is. Load. Load. All right,
• 1:14:08
  this is getting annoying. Load. This show's going
• 1:14:12
  to be the end of me. I swear to God. Why is the
• 1:14:14
  internet so slow? Derikov is gifting his wife,
• 1:14:17
  Haley Erbert, a very special table. The Dancing
• 1:14:20
  with the Stars judge bought Haley the gorgeous
• 1:14:22
  wooden table from their baby shower venue last
• 1:14:25
  year. In a May 11th TikTok, he says, it was absolutely
• 1:14:28
  huge. So massive, it took like seven guys to
• 1:14:31
  carry this thing through our house. After the
• 1:14:34
  movers placed the table, the Dancing with the
• 1:14:36
  Stars judge had a team of people planting succulents.
• 1:14:39
  All right, there you go. So there's that. Eight,
• 1:14:41
  five, six. 49 Hoppy. That's 856 -494 -6773. What's
• 1:14:47
  going on here? What is going on? We're going
• 1:14:54
  to do this together. Lord. Lord. This is honestly
• 1:15:01
  getting annoying. Trying to do it. Paul has been
• 1:15:05
  nothing but supportive of this, and he has his
• 1:15:07
  jobs, and I have my jobs. Performing gymnastics.
• 1:15:10
  So this is Libby Dunn, a hot piece of ass, talking
• 1:15:13
  about her boyfriend's approval of joining Baywatch.
• 1:15:15
  I don't really get nervous for either one. I
• 1:15:17
  don't know why. I think I've just gotten to the
• 1:15:19
  point where I just trust in my training, whether
• 1:15:22
  it's gymnastics or reading a script and getting...
• 1:15:24
  All right. There's a script to looking hot on
• 1:15:28
  screen. You learn something new. Like, if you
• 1:15:35
  would have told me there was acting in Baywatch,
• 1:15:37
  I'd be like, really? I did not know that. It
• 1:15:41
  all seems the same. Just hot ass women jumping
• 1:15:43
  around with big boobs, you know. That's all it
• 1:15:48
  is. A nothing more and a nothing less. 856 -49
• 1:15:54
  -HAPPY - HAPPY HOT TOPIC! One lucky Wheel of
• 1:15:59
  Fortune contestant is going to drive off in a
• 1:16:01
  luxury set of wheels. Yeah. And that's because
• 1:16:05
  Jay Leno is donating one of his cars to the Daytime
• 1:16:08
  Game Show. The former late night host, with the
• 1:16:12
  help of Vanna White, announces during the May
• 1:16:15
  11th episode that he's giving away a 2026 Chevrolet
• 1:16:18
  Corvette priced around $70 ,000 to one of the
• 1:16:21
  players in the May 15th episode. All right, so
• 1:16:25
  he's being generous. Jay Leno seems like a good
• 1:16:27
  dude. Yeah, he had some flaws about his insecurity,
• 1:16:31
  about David Letterman. But overall, I'd rather
• 1:16:35
  hang out with Jay Leno than Letterman. Michael
• 1:16:37
  Richards is looking different these days. The
• 1:16:42
  Seinfeld alum was publicly seen for the first
• 1:16:45
  time in two years. Hey! Stepping out on May 10th
• 1:16:49
  for a casual show. He looks old. I mean, I know
• 1:16:54
  everyone gets old, but he looks old. Dropping
• 1:16:57
  trip at Melroy's Place in West Hollywood, California.
• 1:17:00
  For the outing, Michael donned a dark jacket
• 1:17:03
  with matching jeans and thick -soled boots with
• 1:17:05
  his signature bushy hair. Alright, so he was
• 1:17:08
  seen. Mark Consuelos is mourning his dad. More
• 1:17:14
  than a month after Mark shared the news about
• 1:17:16
  his dad's passing. The Life with Kelly and Mark
• 1:17:19
  co -host. All this show, I've been talking smack.
• 1:17:24
  But guess what? I lost my dad at age 21, and
• 1:17:28
  it's very weird when you lose your father. You
• 1:17:30
  almost start to kind of feel like you're empty
• 1:17:32
  in the world. Even if you're not close to your
• 1:17:35
  dad. Giving an update on his grief journey. In
• 1:17:39
  a May 12th episode of the I've Never Said This
• 1:17:41
  Before with Tommy Daddario podcast. So then play
• 1:17:43
  the audio. We don't want to hear this broad talking.
• 1:17:46
  Mark says, it was kind of a brutal five -month
• 1:17:49
  saga leading up to him passing. I knew it was
• 1:17:51
  happening. We all knew this is going to happen.
• 1:17:54
  Mark had prayed for a merciful exit and was glad
• 1:17:57
  that Saul's passing happened, as he calls it,
• 1:17:59
  very quickly and painlessly. That's good. Sounds
• 1:18:03
  like he died in his sleep. What's going on with
• 1:18:05
  James Franco? He made the news for once. Load.
• 1:18:12
  And this has been annoying today. Load. James
• 1:18:15
  Franco's returning to the spotlight. The actor
• 1:18:17
  stepped out during Cannes Film Festival alongside
• 1:18:20
  his longtime girlfriend, Isabella Paxad. What
• 1:18:23
  a hot piece of ass. You know, she has a lot of
• 1:18:25
  explaining to do when she's dating James Franco.
• 1:18:27
  Oh, he's not that bad. Oh, those stories are
• 1:18:30
  exaggerated. 210, the May 12th screening of The
• 1:18:34
  Electric Kiss. For the occasion, James wore a
• 1:18:36
  classic black tuxedo and bow tie, opting to wear
• 1:18:39
  black sunglasses again. All right, so he was
• 1:18:41
  seen on about 856, 49 hoppy. We're just kind
• 1:18:45
  of in speed around here. Load. Can these videos
• 1:18:52
  load? That should be my new catchphrase, load.
• 1:18:59
  I want to dump a load on you. Macaulay Culkin
• 1:19:01
  is looking back on his time with his late Home
• 1:19:04
  Alone co -star, Catherine O 'Hara. The former
• 1:19:07
  child star opened up to Gentleman's Journal about
• 1:19:10
  the recent loss of Catherine, who died on January
• 1:19:13
  30th. Four months ago? No. Wow, I flew by. He
• 1:19:18
  wished he had more time with her. He told the
• 1:19:20
  outlet, when Catherine passed away in January,
• 1:19:23
  that hit me. That hit me pretty good because,
• 1:19:26
  you know, it was just too soon and I felt that
• 1:19:28
  we had unfinished business. I feel like they
• 1:19:30
  could have done a Home Alone podcast. I definitely
• 1:19:32
  feel like I had unfinished business with her.
• 1:19:35
  I feel like I owed her a favor and I don't like
• 1:19:37
  having outstanding debt. I'm going to call the
• 1:19:40
  clerk and see if I can get ass, dude. I don't
• 1:19:44
  want to be friends with him. What's going on
• 1:19:46
  with this loser? This running FBI director, Kash
• 1:19:48
  Patel, he just looks like a maniac. He very much
• 1:19:53
  has bitch slap face. You just don't want him
• 1:19:55
  to be around. Like when Kash Patel enters the
• 1:19:57
  room and then leaves, everyone talks about him.
• 1:20:01
  On taxpayer money, drinking beer at the hockey
• 1:20:03
  team like a drunken loser. In the hot seat on
• 1:20:06
  Capitol Hill, grilled by Senate Democrats about
• 1:20:09
  grilled. sports of excessive drinking, and unexplained
• 1:20:12
  absences on the job. Yeah, you know, he's got
• 1:20:15
  some prostitutes next to him. And so there have
• 1:20:18
  been no occasions when your security detail had
• 1:20:21
  difficulty waking or locating you. Is that right?
• 1:20:23
  Nope, it's a total farce. I don't even know where
• 1:20:25
  you get this stuff. That is what every alcoholic
• 1:20:29
  says. Oh, it's totally not true. Even though
• 1:20:32
  everyone's saying it. And you have the drunken
• 1:20:34
  eyes. But it doesn't make it credible because
• 1:20:37
  you say so. I'm not saying it, Director Patel.
• 1:20:41
  It's been written and documented. Yeah, it's
• 1:20:44
  not. You know, it's a text message going around
• 1:20:46
  the group chat. When it's documented. he's probably
• 1:20:51
  just throwing lines of coke and just banging
• 1:20:55
  anything that breathes. Literally saying it.
• 1:20:57
  No, I'm saying that these are reports, Director
• 1:21:00
  Patel. Patel, who's now suing the Atlantic after
• 1:21:02
  it... Loser! ...reported on alleged bouts of
• 1:21:06
  excessive drinking, asked if he'd submit to a
• 1:21:08
  test given to active -duty military to... Oh,
• 1:21:11
  yeah. Diagnosed drinking problems. I'll take
• 1:21:16
  any test you're willing to take. I will take
• 1:21:17
  it. He looks hard. Take it, Dr. Director Patelli.
• 1:21:20
  I'll take it. You ready to take it? Let's go.
• 1:21:22
  Yes or no? Let's go. Side by side. I'll take
• 1:21:26
  it. The embattled FBI director defending this
• 1:21:28
  trip to the Winter Olympics. Loser! celebrating
• 1:21:32
  and pounding beer with the victorious USA men's
• 1:21:35
  hockey team. He did not know he was on camera
• 1:21:38
  like a drunken mon. The director insisting he
• 1:21:41
  was in Italy on separate official business. I'm
• 1:21:45
  going to pass out liquor or pop bottles in a
• 1:21:47
  locker room. Stick to podcasting. Patel firing
• 1:21:51
  back, citing a slew of crime stats. This is what
• 1:21:54
  real leadership looks like at the FBI. He's just
• 1:21:58
  so unlikable. I'm not saying Trump's likable,
• 1:22:01
  but Trump can be funny at times in an ironic
• 1:22:04
  way, but Patel's just a dish. Every one of you
• 1:22:07
  was given it. This is what's happened under my
• 1:22:09
  tenure at the FBI and the Trump administration.
• 1:22:11
  Oh, good job! You're doing your job? Wow! No
• 1:22:15
  way! Rabbiting! Congrats on doing your job! 20
• 1:22:20
  -point drop in the homicide rate. 45 ,000 violent
• 1:22:23
  offenders arrested last year. So how'd you cover
• 1:22:25
  up the pedophile files? Mm -hmm. Your alleged
• 1:22:29
  conduct become a distraction to the president,
• 1:22:31
  Mr. Director? Handpicked to lead the bureau and
• 1:22:34
  a longtime defender of the president. That's
• 1:22:37
  why, because he defends that pedophile man. Sources
• 1:22:40
  tell ABC News Trump has grown increasingly frustrated
• 1:22:43
  with the spate of negative headlines about Patel.
• 1:22:46
  Yeah, I mean, think about every other previous
• 1:22:48
  presidency ever. Even when Trump was president
• 1:22:51
  in 2016 to 20, we never heard about the FBI director.
• 1:22:55
  Reading the director like this at a Rose Garden
• 1:22:57
  event just days ago. FBI director Cash Patel,
• 1:23:01
  does he get enough publicity? If you could get
• 1:23:02
  a little more publicity, we'd be very happy.
• 1:23:06
  That's what I'm talking about. Do I like Trump?
• 1:23:09
  No. But lines like that is why he's like 0 .01
• 1:23:14
  % a little more likable than Patel. Patel has
• 1:23:17
  never made me laugh. You just laugh at his drunken
• 1:23:19
  ass like you're a moron. That is rude. New numbers
• 1:23:24
  showing local hotels aren't seeing the surge
• 1:23:27
  they expected for this year's World Cup. No way.
• 1:23:30
  It's almost like we're in America. We got a recession
• 1:23:33
  going on. We don't want to see soccer. FIFA promised
• 1:23:36
  billions for the region, but some say the cup
• 1:23:38
  is looking more like a bust. What's going on
• 1:23:44
  here? That was dramatic. That's my anxiety in
• 1:23:49
  public. Hey, Matt, you have any comment on you
• 1:23:54
  eventually wanting to get back into the media
• 1:23:56
  business? I got it. Yeah, my comment is. Is it
• 1:23:59
  Matt Lauer? I am really happy. You are? I'm doing.
• 1:24:03
  All right. He's all lazier as well. Be happier.
• 1:24:06
  All right, I'll take that as a no. All right.
• 1:24:14
  Locking women in his office. The hell's wrong
• 1:24:16
  with you, dude? I told this to somebody the other
• 1:24:18
  day. There is nothing better than consent. Like,
• 1:24:21
  when a beautiful woman wants to have sex with
• 1:24:23
  you, I don't understand why men are like, I'm
• 1:24:25
  going to rape her. Like, what the hell is wrong
• 1:24:26
  with you? Moron. There's nothing better than
• 1:24:31
  when that bra comes off and you feel like you
• 1:24:33
  earned it. Like the girl wants to die. Steve
• 1:24:39
  Hilton is running for mayor of LA and knows nothing
• 1:24:42
  about LA. Here is a video of him discussing a
• 1:24:46
  street taco. And he didn't know that was a type
• 1:24:48
  of taco. He was eating a taco in the street.
• 1:24:52
  These stupid politicians. California gubernatorial
• 1:24:55
  candidate Steve Hilton is going viral over a
• 1:24:58
  food flub. He's being called out for what people
• 1:25:01
  call his lack of taco knowledge. I did. Why am
• 1:25:05
  I holding a Barstow Street taco? You hear that
• 1:25:08
  laughter in the background? Lack of taco knowledge.
• 1:25:12
  Why am I holding a Barstow Street taco right
• 1:25:16
  now? Because I just bought it at this historic
• 1:25:18
  location. Check it out. The original. Del Taco.
• 1:25:22
  And it's not even a soft taco, moron. There it
• 1:25:25
  is. My Barstow Street Taco. I'm going to enjoy
• 1:25:27
  it. Does nobody on his team, I mean, with these
• 1:25:30
  politicians doing these videos, is nobody like
• 1:25:32
  pulling them aside? Are the politicians so egotistical
• 1:25:35
  that they're not listening to any of the interns
• 1:25:37
  that are like, dude, it's not a street taco.
• 1:25:40
  See you soon. Hilton filmed himself outside of
• 1:25:44
  Del Taco's original location in Barstow and referred
• 1:25:46
  to his food choice as a Barstow street taco.
• 1:25:49
  People were quick to point out fast food taco
• 1:25:51
  does not qualify as authentic street tacos, which
• 1:25:54
  is typically served by vendors or carts. Moron.
• 1:25:59
  He should totally run LA. I mean, anything's
• 1:26:02
  better than Karen Bass, to be honest. So neon
• 1:26:04
  was seen on the bar with Ray J. And Ray J said,
• 1:26:09
  you ghosted me and became friends with the Kardashians.
• 1:26:11
  I think it's because you stream with the Kardashians,
• 1:26:13
  so you don't want to f*** with me. No, no, no,
• 1:26:15
  no, no. I don't like this nice guy acting neon,
• 1:26:18
  puts on all this nauseating. I don't shoot with
• 1:26:21
  the Kardashians. Yes, you do. Alabama Barker.
• 1:26:24
  She a Kardashian. But, no, we were talking before
• 1:26:28
  that, though. A year before that. You just stopped
• 1:26:31
  calling me. Yeah, Ray J's wearing this, like,
• 1:26:34
  it looks like a red, it's like, it's shaped like
• 1:26:37
  Pikachu's head, and it's like a mask, but it's
• 1:26:39
  red, and it has, like, devil horns. It's very
• 1:26:41
  strange. But I feel like Neon don't f*** with
• 1:26:44
  me because he f***ed with the Kardashians. Nah,
• 1:26:46
  listen, I got no bad blood with anyone, bro.
• 1:26:48
  It's all love. I just don't believe the Neon
• 1:26:50
  thing anymore. I don't know what it is. Do you
• 1:26:53
  love the Kardashians? Well, I don't know the
• 1:26:55
  Kardashians. Yes, you do. No, I don't. I don't.
• 1:26:58
  You be streaming with them f***ers. Ray J cares
• 1:27:01
  a little too much about them. They're bust downs.
• 1:27:07
  Alright, I feel stupider for listening to that.
• 1:27:10
  Alright, you know what it's time for? I'm ready
• 1:27:14
  to go right now. I'm ready to go right now. It's
• 1:27:17
  time for Kardashian News. Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo,
• 1:27:20
  yo, yo. Turn it up, it's happy hour time. Kardashian
• 1:27:25
  News, we dissect the clime. No filters, no fluff,
• 1:27:28
  raw truth and wine Mic's hot, Hoppy speaks what's
• 1:27:31
  on his mind Nepotism's thrown, they sittin' in
• 1:27:34
  the plush Built an empire off nothin' but the
• 1:27:37
  hush Reality's a script, ain't no realness in
• 1:27:39
  the cut Talent's on vacation, they just takin'
• 1:27:42
  what's corrupt Hoppy's on the mic, call it verbal
• 1:27:44
  demolition Exposin' fake lives, media's worse
• 1:27:47
  addiction Idiocracy crammed, it's the brain on
• 1:27:50
  snooze Clickbait queens, welcome to Kardashian
• 1:27:52
  News I'll be breaking down the hype, y 'all beware
• 1:27:57
  Fake smells, fake lies, fake lives, fake drama,
• 1:28:00
  they choose No talent required, it's Kardashian
• 1:28:03
  news It's Kardashian news Get scared, Hoppy breakin'
• 1:28:07
  down the hype, y 'all beware Fake stuff, fake
• 1:28:09
  lies, fake drama, they choose No talent required,
• 1:28:13
  it's Kardashian news Diamond -studded lies sellin'
• 1:28:16
  dreams to the broke Gold -plated nothin', society
• 1:28:19
  inside joke Hoppy ain't scared, man, he roastin'
• 1:28:22
  em raw Netmo babies flexin' like they rewrote
• 1:28:24
  the law Surgical precision, every word's a slice
• 1:28:28
  Hypocrisy exposed under studio lights Instagram
• 1:28:31
  filters, they mask the truth Hoppy's here to
• 1:28:34
  school em, welcome to the booth Yeah, Hoppy's
• 1:28:36
  got no leash, no chain Speakin' what he feels,
• 1:28:40
  never playin' a game No Kardashian can spin his
• 1:28:43
  name On this mic he reigns, untamed Where the
• 1:28:48
  truth gets aired Hoppy breakin' down the hype,
• 1:28:50
  y 'all beware Fake smile, fake lies, fake drama
• 1:28:53
  they choose No talent required, it's Kardashian
• 1:28:56
  news Shown it up, it's Hoppy, now what's hot?
• 1:29:01
  Hoppy speaks what's on his mind Oh, yeah. Eight,
• 1:29:15
  five, six. Eight, five, six, four, nine, four,
• 1:29:20
  six, seven, seven, three. All right. What's going
• 1:29:23
  on with the Kardashians? Kourtney Kardashian
• 1:29:38
  and Khloe Kardashian have a few words for their
• 1:29:41
  little sister. After Kylie Jenner posted a picture
• 1:29:45
  of herself posing with grandma Mary Jo Campbell,
• 1:29:48
  mom Kris Jenner, and sister Kim Kardashian for
• 1:29:50
  Mother's Day, her older sisters are now calling
• 1:29:53
  her out for allegedly cropping them out. In the
• 1:29:58
  comments of the May 11th IG post, Kourtney writes,
• 1:30:01
  did you crop me out? To which Kylie replies,
• 1:30:04
  crop, have you ever heard of Facetune vanish?
• 1:30:07
  Wow, you're an outer millennial. And Kourtney
• 1:30:11
  was clearly amused by the response, writing,
• 1:30:14
  I was going to say I think I was sitting right
• 1:30:16
  next to you. I'm actually LOLing. No, you're
• 1:30:19
  not. You guys are feuding like a bunch of cackling
• 1:30:21
  hens. RyanHoppyRadio .com. The hour will be right
• 1:30:39
  back. You probably had Taco Bell before. Whenever
• 1:30:42
  we're going outside, all I smell is poop. And
• 1:30:48
  we'll call it a day. The semen was so big. As
• 1:30:53
  a reminder, if you don't feel like listening
• 1:30:55
  to this next song, you can skip over it. But
• 1:30:57
  Ryan Hoppy of Hoppy Hour takes pride in his selection,
• 1:31:00
  so stick around, folks. Oh, yeah. Don't worry,
• 1:31:04
  Fresno. Hoppy Hour will be right back. Oh, yeah.
• 1:31:08
  Here's New World Hustle with Fresh. Load. Can
• 1:31:13
  this load? Please load. I'll wait here all day.
• 1:31:18
  I don't know what's going on with the internet
• 1:31:19
  tonight. driving me nuts i'm going insane but
• 1:31:25
  here it is ready let's I'm fresh, falling to
• 1:32:16
  the death, three point range, following my steps,
• 1:32:19
  clear, plain, calling from a jet, I could go
• 1:32:22
  for a ride, I could go for a ride, I could go
• 1:32:23
  for a ride Only Guatemala in the stack I spent
• 1:32:25
  a hundred on the wrist, another hundred on the
• 1:32:27
  chain I'm so, so fresh, money in the thing Louis
• 1:32:30
  and Jermaine, but one up in the same And the
• 1:32:33
  sun up in the flame, make it sunny in the rain
• 1:32:59
  And if I want it that bad, I'll take that A few
• 1:33:03
  people from a pad, y 'all hatin' that Ain't that
• 1:33:05
  true? Big Dame and that's cool DJ Smooth killin'
• 1:33:09
  what you gon' do See, I'm the rude boy, yeah,
• 1:33:12
  the big thing got a Bitch shiny track, my clue
• 1:33:15
  is polished Hydro, I got it, flow old to chronic
• 1:33:18
  Flow hoes through, these suckas ain't know who
• 1:33:20
  Ever supposed to even take that shit too Runnin'
• 1:33:23
  they whole crew, make it worth a stroll too See,
• 1:33:26
  you will lay with us I just play with her. Give
• 1:33:29
  me an hour, homie, you can spend the day with
• 1:33:31
  her. You take a shot and spend your money just
• 1:33:33
  to stay with her. She on the knees, homie, I
• 1:33:35
  ain't about to pray with her. My car is, my house
• 1:33:38
  is, everything that comes out my mouth is. We
• 1:33:41
  G -O -U -T -I -E, we G -O -U -T -I -E. My car
• 1:33:47
  is, my chain is, next is my watch and my ring
• 1:33:51
  is. 2 million, 3 million, 4 million 5 million,
• 1:34:11
  6 million, 7 million mic was off oh yeah that
• 1:34:55
  was the best one second of radio you've never
• 1:34:57
  heard because it was not being recorded oh yeah
• 1:35:00
  that was new world hustle with fresh now let's
• 1:35:05
  i'll get back to the show but real quick Right
• 1:35:10
  here. Hey, what's up? It's DJ Love Cheese from
• 1:35:12
  the world -famous Man Cow Show, and you're listening
• 1:35:15
  to my good pal and radio legend, Ryan Hoppy on
• 1:35:19
  the Hoppy Hour. Wow, thank you. I love when people
• 1:35:21
  add the radio legend part. It boosts my ego.
• 1:35:23
  There is no nepotism here. Welcome back to Hoppy
• 1:35:26
  Hour with Ryan Hoppy. Yeah, we hate the John
• 1:35:28
  Show. The golden age of radio is alive and well
• 1:35:32
  on Hoppy Hour with Ryan Hoppy. Welcome to...
• 1:35:41
  Hello. Hello. Hello. Something completely different.
• 1:36:21
  It's happy hour. Ladies and gentlemen, here it
• 1:36:46
  is. The most recent true radio show on the web.
• 1:36:50
  And the other stations are tuned in too. Nobody
• 1:37:07
  cares. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Nobody cares. No,
• 1:37:20
  no, no, no, no, nobody cares. Time for Late Night
• 1:37:27
  TV sucks to song. Late night panel, all fake
• 1:37:31
  smile. Same old soup, same old vibe. Same old
• 1:37:35
  joke, same old grin. Talking loud, saying thin.
• 1:37:39
  You got that cue card, that canned applause.
• 1:37:42
  Plastic outrage, paper thin claws. I change the
• 1:37:47
  channel and I don't regret you. You call it sharp,
• 1:37:50
  I call it bland. Finger pointing with a rented
• 1:37:54
  hand. Big laugh, small thought all day long.
• 1:37:57
  Home posing like they never wrong. Save it for
• 1:38:00
  the crowd. Save it for the ride home. Keep on
• 1:38:27
  pretending Still nobody cares There's smoke in
• 1:38:31
  the velvet chair Acting real deep with a glossy
• 1:38:34
  stare But the same old punchlines hit the floor
• 1:38:37
  Sounded fresh in 2004 You roast against your
• 1:38:41
  gringy brain Then cut to a laugh like a machine
• 1:38:45
  All night built on a safe little bite Little
• 1:38:48
  fake bite in a borrowed life You want a scandal,
• 1:38:52
  want a scene Want the whole thing neat, want
• 1:38:54
  the whole thing clean We'll be right back. 8
• 1:39:31
  -5 -6 -4 -9 -4 -6 -7 -3 -8 -5 -6 -4 -9 -4 -6
• 1:39:38
  -7 -3 -8 -5 -6 -4 -9 -4 -6 -7 -3 -8 -5 -6 -4
• 1:39:39
  -9 -4 -6 -7 -3 -8 -5 -6 -4 -9 -4 -6 -7 -3 -8
• 1:39:40
  -5 -6 -4 -9 -4 -6 -7 -3 -8 -5 -6 -4 -9 -4 -6
• 1:39:41
  -7 -3 -8 -5 -6 -4 -9 -4 -6 -7 -3 -8 -5 -6 -4
• 1:39:41
  -9 -4 -6 -7 -3 -8 -5 -6 -4 -9 -4 -6 -7 -3 -8
• 1:39:44
  -5 -6 -7 -7 -3 -8 -5 -6 -7 -7 -3 -8 -5 -6 -7
• 1:39:46
  -7 -3 -8 -5 -6 -7 - This is getting annoying.
• 1:40:10
  The five of us being here right now, obviously
• 1:40:13
  it's dangerous. It's not dangerous at all. You
• 1:40:16
  had all the late night show hosts sending off
• 1:40:18
  Colbert. They live in a bubble where because
• 1:40:21
  they have kind of a fan base, they think they
• 1:40:23
  matter, but they're so irrelevant. Jon Stewart
• 1:40:27
  is designated survivor. You're so funny, Colbert.
• 1:40:32
  Gee, I wonder why you're going out there. Someone
• 1:40:35
  has to survive for the president to be mad at.
• 1:40:38
  Wow. Talking about the president. Can you imagine
• 1:40:41
  that? Your whole life and your whole comedy routine
• 1:40:44
  revolves around Trump. Mmm. Did it ever occur
• 1:40:48
  to you that you'd be doing a job that the President
• 1:40:52
  of the United States would have strong feelings
• 1:40:53
  about? No. No? You know what's even weirder?
• 1:40:57
  We're doing a job that his wife has strong feelings
• 1:41:00
  about. You're so funny, Cabo. What is going on
• 1:41:05
  with comedy, man? I love how they claim. Mmm.
• 1:41:10
  Mm -hmm. They claim they don't need Trump. Yet
• 1:41:14
  all they talk about is him. You guys love him.
• 1:41:17
  Most of us have avoided that part. Yeah, that's
• 1:41:19
  true. Here we go again. Is there anything that
• 1:41:21
  we have not touched on? The outrage that your
• 1:41:24
  show is being thrown off the air? Oh, boo -hoo!
• 1:41:28
  He was losing money! What are you... God, this
• 1:41:31
  is the thing that drives me nuts! Yes, he had
• 1:41:34
  viewers. It wasn't like he had zero viewers.
• 1:41:36
  He was costing them money. Money. They lost $20
• 1:41:40
  million a year because of him. Of course he's
• 1:41:43
  going to get thrown off. You're a bitch. You
• 1:41:49
  guys have no idea. There's only seven more shows
• 1:41:55
  before Colbert's final episode airs next Thursday.
• 1:41:58
  Remember when Letterman went off air around this
• 1:42:00
  time 11 years ago and how big every night was
• 1:42:02
  like Don Rickles and Howard Stern. And maybe
• 1:42:07
  it was even like Joan Rivers. It was all the
• 1:42:10
  big names. And Colbert, it's like no one cares.
• 1:42:13
  And as you'd expect, Kimmel, Fallon. They're
• 1:42:15
  just such losers and they think their opinion
• 1:42:18
  matters, but their ratings are at a record low.
• 1:42:22
  It's like, you guys are dorks. Yeah, you're talented.
• 1:42:24
  Bye. John Oliver and Seth Meyers turned up the
• 1:42:28
  heat during this battle game. They're just so
• 1:42:31
  dorky. I don't know why I'm dorky, but at least
• 1:42:34
  I'm self -aware. They think they're, like, changing
• 1:42:36
  the world with their opinion. It's like, shut
• 1:42:38
  up. Bank each other? Make out with a guest on
• 1:42:44
  camera. Why would you look at me like that? Because
• 1:42:46
  I think you've made out with guests on camera.
• 1:42:47
  No, I think you just wanted to make out with
• 1:42:49
  me. Oh, there's Colbert and Jimmy Fallon making
• 1:42:54
  out. Riveting stuff. It's so weird, man. I don't
• 1:43:01
  understand it. I feel like I'm missing out on
• 1:43:05
  something. Because all the liberals love these
• 1:43:07
  shows and laugh. I think it's unwatchable. Have
• 1:43:11
  you guys ever made out with a guest on camera?
• 1:43:13
  Yeah. Regis once. Not only did I kiss. And then
• 1:43:17
  he came. See, I'm not homophobic. I don't, but
• 1:43:20
  this is like, what are you doing? They're making
• 1:43:22
  out with dudes. What are you doing? Regis, he
• 1:43:25
  chewed my gum. Regis kissed me on the top of
• 1:43:27
  the head. Martin Short, we're on. Martin Short's
• 1:43:31
  another annoying dude. What is up with these
• 1:43:38
  late night talk shows kissing dudes? Sounds like
• 1:43:42
  you weren't kissing the executive enough to keep
• 1:43:44
  your job. Alright, hoppy soups. Maybe a mouth
• 1:43:55
  hug would have helped. I got it. MJ to Kobe,
• 1:44:16
  legends in the game. So I thought this was ridiculous.
• 1:44:19
  Rest in peace to Brandon Clark. But everyone's
• 1:44:23
  going around online saying that he was a drug
• 1:44:26
  addict because he had possession of Kratom. Rise
• 1:44:30
  and fall. And this was absolutely infuriating
• 1:44:32
  to me because it gives Kratom a bad name. In
• 1:44:35
  Florida, it has helped out so many people. And
• 1:44:38
  then you get pulled over and arrested in Arkansas
• 1:44:41
  for having him. This is how backwards and how
• 1:44:44
  messed up this country is. That poor Brandon
• 1:44:46
  Clark felt shame for having something that's
• 1:44:49
  legal in Minnesota, Illinois, North Carolina,
• 1:44:52
  Florida. I thought that was absolutely sickening.
• 1:44:55
  And the sad part is Brandon Clark dying and him
• 1:45:00
  having the arrest for Kratom. Now everyone's
• 1:45:02
  going to think Kratom's the worst thing ever.
• 1:45:04
  The same thing that happened with Matthew Perry
• 1:45:07
  and Ketamine. I have so many friends that Ketamine
• 1:45:10
  has helped. But because Matthew Perry did it,
• 1:45:12
  but he did enough for like five horses. This
• 1:45:16
  is what drives me nuts about the news is they
• 1:45:18
  don't go, well, he was, you know, doing too much
• 1:45:21
  of it. Do your own research and realize it ain't
• 1:45:25
  that bad. Rest in peace, Brandon Clark. All right.
• 1:45:31
  Here's Jason Tatum talking about his Achilles
• 1:45:34
  tear. You know, every specialist I've talked
• 1:45:38
  to would say they'd be lying if they could tell
• 1:45:39
  you exactly why it happens. I remember the very
• 1:45:45
  next day I got my MRI. I asked the doctor and
• 1:45:49
  I was like, if I got an MRI the day before, would
• 1:45:53
  you have been able to, you know, tell me that
• 1:45:55
  I was in risk? And he was like, honestly, you
• 1:45:58
  might not want to hear this, but your tendon
• 1:46:00
  looks perfectly healthy. It was just an unlucky.
• 1:46:04
  All right, so it was unlucky. And then here is
• 1:46:06
  the murder. Alonzo Ball being a reason he went
• 1:46:10
  to Chicago. I remember before I went to Chicago.
• 1:46:13
  That was a bust, man. I thought they were going
• 1:46:15
  to do better. I was hesitant on even going because
• 1:46:18
  I was like, they don't even have a point guard.
• 1:46:20
  Like, I'm not. No. All right. Well, I'm going
• 1:46:25
  to come. He's really well -spoken. Point guard.
• 1:46:28
  I mean, give us a couple days, we're going to
• 1:46:30
  get a point guard. And they told me the options.
• 1:46:33
  And Zoe was one of them. I'm like, if y 'all
• 1:46:34
  get Zoe. Yeah, Alonzo Ball, his injuries really
• 1:46:37
  stops him from being like a Derek Fisher type
• 1:46:39
  of player. Like, not like an all -star, but a
• 1:46:42
  bowler. A shot. I'll call her. 100%. I'll come.
• 1:46:44
  All right. All right. There you go. And then
• 1:46:47
  there's this annoying streamer. I had a hard
• 1:46:49
  time saying that. Mm -hmm. Don't even know what
• 1:46:53
  his name is. But the NBA refs, Tony Brothers,
• 1:46:57
  he was walking to his hotel after the game four
• 1:47:04
  of the Thunder versus Lakers where the Lakers
• 1:47:06
  got swept. And there were some questionable calls
• 1:47:08
  like there always are. And this streamer interrogated
• 1:47:14
  Tony Brothers. You're annoying, dude. I bet you
• 1:47:25
  didn't even know who the Lakers were six years
• 1:47:27
  ago. Yeah, they're definitely not going to let
• 1:47:39
  the refs walk in public again. I am a moron.
• 1:47:46
  It ain't that deep, dude. The Lakers don't care
• 1:47:48
  about you. Oh, yeah. Got 122 days until the NFL
• 1:47:56
  returns. I'm very excited. Also... That means
• 1:48:02
  that there's going to be the thing that's known
• 1:48:05
  as the winner. So I have this new thing now that
• 1:48:08
  whenever I think of the NFL, I think of cold
• 1:48:10
  weather and whatnot. So I'm not really rushing
• 1:48:13
  for the NFL to return. But I do kind of miss
• 1:48:15
  the community that happens when the NFL is going
• 1:48:20
  on. But first, you can call the show. 856 -49
• 1:48:26
  -HOPPY. 856 -494 -6773. You're tweeting me at
• 1:48:33
  RyanHoppyRadio. Always email me, RyanHoppyRadio
• 1:48:38
  at gmail .com. But before we get to these headlines
• 1:48:41
  about Eli Manning and Dave Poinoy critiquing
• 1:48:44
  Justin Herbert and this creepy rookie quarterback
• 1:48:47
  on the Ravens, Diego Pavia being creepy around
• 1:48:50
  girls, let's let this music finish up. There's
• 1:49:03
  Dave Portnoy critiquing Justin Herbert being
• 1:49:05
  in Madison Beer's music video. I think we have
• 1:49:08
  an epidemic in the NFL. I really do. And my epidemic
• 1:49:12
  is quarterbacks who are acting like they've won
• 1:49:14
  Super Bowls. I don't want to sound like the guy
• 1:49:16
  who's on later. You know, people like when I
• 1:49:19
  ranted about this, the Colin Coward, like, tell
• 1:49:21
  us how you feel about quarterbacks wearing their
• 1:49:23
  hats backwards. But I do feel like we have quarterbacks
• 1:49:29
  acting like they've won things before they've
• 1:49:31
  won things. I get it. You got a beautiful girlfriend.
• 1:49:33
  She's great. But Joe Burrow, he dresses like
• 1:49:36
  some crazy person. He's showing up to these events.
• 1:49:39
  I remember a guy by the name of Tom Brady who
• 1:49:45
  does that now. Tom Brady is everywhere now. He
• 1:49:49
  was nowhere before he won some Super Bowls. You
• 1:49:54
  got to win first before you do this. I want my
• 1:49:56
  coach. How coked up is Dave Poinoy right now?
• 1:49:59
  I want my quarterbacks. I want all the guys I
• 1:50:02
  need. No offseason distractions. In the weight
• 1:50:06
  room. In the films. I mean, that is a good point.
• 1:50:09
  Because you know Herbert's going to go like 10
• 1:50:10
  -8 and then lose in the first round of the playoffs.
• 1:50:13
  Here is Eli Manning talking about the infamous
• 1:50:15
  Miami boat trip that Odell Beckham and the team
• 1:50:18
  went on before the playoff game. When you guys
• 1:50:21
  win that game. And those guys go on that trip.
• 1:50:25
  Two things. I have two questions for you. One,
• 1:50:27
  were you invited? And two, do you think it really
• 1:50:30
  had that big of an effect on what people say
• 1:50:32
  it is for the Giants? No. No and no. I was not
• 1:50:36
  invited. I was not invited on the boys' trip
• 1:50:38
  to Miami. It wouldn't have gone in any way, I
• 1:50:40
  don't think. But, yeah, I mean, here it is. Obviously,
• 1:50:44
  I don't think they prepared to go to Miami. They're
• 1:50:46
  all on a boat in jeans and Timberlands. Yeah.
• 1:50:51
  I think it was a last second deal. You know,
• 1:50:55
  I think they went out all night. So, like, yeah,
• 1:50:57
  I mean, it's just a bad look. It's like, hey,
• 1:50:59
  we're in the playoffs. We're ready. Like, we
• 1:51:01
  want to make a run. Oh, yeah, but first, let's
• 1:51:04
  go on a Sunday night, Monday, Miami, just stay
• 1:51:08
  up all night, get focused. So, obviously, they're
• 1:51:11
  back. I mean, they're back on, I don't know if
• 1:51:13
  they came back Monday night. We have an off day
• 1:51:15
  Tuesday. You're back at practice Wednesday. So,
• 1:51:17
  they have time. They're young. They have time
• 1:51:19
  to heal up or whatever. It's just kind of the
• 1:51:21
  psyche around it. Yeah, he's defending them enough.
• 1:51:25
  It's playoff time. Let's take it another notch,
• 1:51:28
  get more focused. There you go. And I just heard
• 1:51:31
  about this guy. Diego Pavia is like this guy
• 1:51:34
  that represented himself in the NFL draft. Didn't
• 1:51:36
  get drafted. Now he's on the practice squad.
• 1:51:38
  And he seems like he's trying to be more like
• 1:51:40
  a neon clavicular than an NFL quarterback, which
• 1:51:42
  is smart because he's not very good and he's
• 1:51:43
  short. And there is a girl that always live streams
• 1:51:46
  for the UFC. And Diego was hitting on her. I
• 1:51:51
  work with the UFC. So, yeah. And I know John
• 1:51:55
  and all these guys. I'm live streaming just so
• 1:51:58
  you know. My camera's on. And then he keeps talking
• 1:52:00
  to her. Just so you know. And then he starts
• 1:52:03
  to touch her shoulder. No, it's good to not hit
• 1:52:08
  on me. Loser! That hot piece of ass didn't know
• 1:52:19
  anything. What the fuck was that interaction?
• 1:52:25
  No. He thinks he's so cool and he's not. He's
• 1:52:30
  got that high school during COVID attitude. And
• 1:52:32
  then here he is catcalling women while eating
• 1:52:36
  Chipotle outside. Man, he's a moron. He's walking
• 1:52:45
  CTE. Trying to get a walk over here. It's like
• 1:52:48
  if a middle schooler became a high school quarterback.
• 1:52:50
  Watch out for Diego Pavia. There's going to be
• 1:52:52
  some charges soon. You don't have that motion.
• 1:52:56
  What? No, no, no. Moose, tell me I have a good
• 1:52:59
  game, please. I promise I will not support that.
• 1:53:02
  Hey, hey, hey. And he is like, he makes Johnny
• 1:53:07
  Mansell look like him. What? Are you trying to...
• 1:53:10
  At least, man, it's all tried. Is that your way
• 1:53:12
  of... Yeah, like, what? Is that your way of calling...
• 1:53:15
  All right. Yeah, dude, I wouldn't even try to
• 1:53:20
  be in the NFL. I would just be a streamer. Admit
• 1:53:22
  you're a douchebag. And that is all you're good
• 1:53:27
  for. Hey, yo. Yo. Motherfuckers. I'm gonna kill
• 1:53:33
  them. Motherfuckers. I hate them. Hey, yo. Yo.
• 1:53:38
  yo static crackles poppy on the air spilling
• 1:53:41
  radio secrets man he don't care airing out the
• 1:53:44
  closet skeletons in pairs dj drama he's the one
• 1:53:48
  who dares program director scheming in the back
• 1:53:51
  rooms payola playlist rigged like monsoon fake
• 1:53:54
  callers on the line they rehearse too soon breaking
• 1:53:57
  news Cardi B and Stefan Diggs are back together.
• 1:54:01
  Man, she has a car chasing hags. She wasn't with
• 1:54:04
  him during that court case. He's the voice of
• 1:54:20
  the FM fizz. Mic in hand, cutting through veneers.
• 1:54:25
  Pulling cards, no regard for... Oh, yeah. All
• 1:54:45
  right. First of all, Ted Whistle is joining the
• 1:54:49
  WDVE Morning Show. I love that name for radio.
• 1:54:52
  Ted Whistle. Mm -hmm. Also, WDVE has got one
• 1:54:56
  of the best morning shows around. This is sad
• 1:54:59
  news. Dave Ryan from KDWB in Minneapolis. Been
• 1:55:04
  there for 33 years. He is retiring. I'm telling
• 1:55:09
  you right now. Let me turn on the music. I have
• 1:55:11
  an official endorsement of who should replace
• 1:55:14
  Dave Ryan. Intern John, who was at Hot 99 .5
• 1:55:19
  for 14 years and then also did radio in Des Moines,
• 1:55:22
  but began as an intern with Dave Ryan. Intern
• 1:55:27
  John was just let go from Hot 99 .5. And if I
• 1:55:31
  were iHeartMedia and I were a program director.
• 1:55:36
  I would bring back your morning show with Intern
• 1:55:38
  John and Shelby SOS and his crew and import them
• 1:55:42
  to Minneapolis. Why? Because that's where Intern
• 1:55:45
  John began. Also, we need more millennials in
• 1:55:47
  radio. And also, he's from Minneapolis, so it
• 1:55:51
  makes sense. Love you, Intern John. All right.
• 1:55:58
  I saw this headline here. Salem Media. Got bought
• 1:56:01
  out. I used to work there, that conservative
• 1:56:03
  company. They got bought out by Waterstone, another
• 1:56:07
  Christian company, and they're going to be private.
• 1:56:09
  They were bought out for a dollar a share. Now,
• 1:56:14
  when I manically quit Beasley Media Group, and
• 1:56:20
  I was out of radio. Salem media took a chance
• 1:56:25
  on me, so I'll never ever talk smack about them
• 1:56:27
  there, but some of those opinions they said,
• 1:56:30
  man, and the anger behind the scenes. But there
• 1:56:35
  was one person that I will always respect, Mike
• 1:56:39
  Gallagher, who's in like 150 cities. I agree
• 1:56:42
  with nothing the man says, but... He has a talk
• 1:56:46
  show. A lot of the conservative talk show hosts
• 1:56:48
  were like journalists turned talk shows. Mike
• 1:56:50
  Gallagher was a radio and TV host first and then
• 1:56:54
  went into the conservative field. So even though
• 1:56:55
  I disagreed with everything he said, like I thought
• 1:56:58
  Charlie Kirk's podcast was terrible, but I did
• 1:57:02
  like Mike Gallagher's show when I worked there.
• 1:57:04
  And here he is saying how show prep has changed
• 1:57:07
  over the years. Show prep, I think all of us
• 1:57:09
  would admit, is now... Truly 24 -7 with social
• 1:57:13
  media. There was a time, first years out of the
• 1:57:17
  gate for me, it was an hour or two before the
• 1:57:20
  show. You'd prep and you'd look at the front
• 1:57:22
  page of the Dayton Daily News and you'd circle
• 1:57:24
  articles and you'd do not anymore. Now it's something
• 1:57:27
  you see at midnight on X. Or you see something
• 1:57:30
  on TikTok. That's me 24 -7. And you send it to
• 1:57:33
  your producer and say, I need that video. And
• 1:57:35
  you just do it constantly. And I can kind of
• 1:57:37
  relate to the fatigue factor because there's
• 1:57:39
  never a break. Go on vacation. There's never,
• 1:57:41
  for me at least. I mean, I feel that when I went
• 1:57:44
  to Chicago and Minneapolis, I still recorded
• 1:57:46
  my shows. Never disconnect and never unplug because
• 1:57:48
  it's a fire hose of information. It really is.
• 1:57:52
  Because you've got to be well -versed in just
• 1:57:54
  about everything that can come up. Sailor Mania,
• 1:57:57
  I'm not a big fan, but Mike Gallagher, I love
• 1:57:59
  you. All right. If you're listening in Fresno,
• 1:58:05
  I'm going to go longer. Search Hoppy Radio to
• 1:58:10
  hear that, but not back to the music. We'll be
• 1:58:14
  right back. Hang on. RyanHoppyRadio .com Hoppy
• 1:58:31
  Hour will be right back. You probably had Taco
• 1:58:34
  Bell before. Whenever we're going outside, all
• 1:58:37
  I smell is poop. And we'll call it a day. The
• 1:58:44
  semen was so big. As a reminder, if you don't
• 1:58:47
  feel like listening to this next song, you can
• 1:58:49
  skip over it. But Ryan Hoppy of Hoppy Hour takes
• 1:58:52
  pride in his selection, so stick around, folks.
• 1:58:56
  Don't worry, Fresno. Copy Hour will be right
• 1:58:59
  back. What song do I feel like playing? First
• 1:59:03
  of all, go to my website, R -Y -A -N -H -O -P
• 1:59:05
  -P -E radio .com. Everything I talk about on
• 1:59:07
  this show is posted there because I care about
• 1:59:11
  you. I really do. We have not played this song
• 1:59:14
  in a minute. Today's been a little more music
• 1:59:16
  -oriented. Usually, I rush through the show,
• 1:59:19
  then I'm done with work by 3 p .m., and then
• 1:59:21
  I have an existential crisis. This, by me doing
• 1:59:24
  the show, prolongs the existential crisis. Now,
• 1:59:27
  we got one hour and 59 minutes and 30 seconds,
• 1:59:30
  so we got 29 seconds left on the feed for Fresno.
• 1:59:34
  27, 26, 25, 24, 23, 22, 21, 20, 19, 18, 17. 16,
• 1:59:45
  15, 14, 13, 12, 11, 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4. I love
• 1:59:56
  you, Fresno. Mm -hmm. Here is Pitbull and Avant
• 2:00:04
  with Damn. Load. Can this load? Please load.
• 2:00:13
  I'll put a... I'll bang you from behind and put
• 2:00:15
  out a big load. My mom's friends listen to this
• 2:00:19
  show. Isn't it frightening? I feel bad for them.
• 2:00:22
  They used to change my diaper. Now I talk about
• 2:00:24
  big loads. We'll be right back. Hang on. She's
• 2:00:41
  so good, so fine, baby, I like it Five plus five,
• 2:00:47
  five times two, ten Five plus five, five times
• 2:00:53
  two, ten She's pretty in the face, so sexy in
• 2:00:56
  the waist And I'm really tryna get down to it
• 2:00:58
  Got me on something else, cause she feelin' herself
• 2:01:00
  And she's tellin' me she really wanna do this
• 2:01:02
  This girl is straight, so I'm a magazine Overcover
• 2:01:07
  or smooth, I'm that dude I'm tryna give it to
• 2:01:10
  you She's dangerous Like a fire to a match, she's
• 2:01:13
  burning up I ain't no amateur Baby, I hope you
• 2:01:17
  got stamina Cause I can be your fitness coach
• 2:01:20
  And I work for free I know how far we can go
• 2:01:24
  Six, six, six, six Damn, look at shorty, look
• 2:01:28
  at shorty She's so good, so hot Just the way
• 2:01:33
  you like it, baby Damn, look at shorty, look
• 2:01:36
  at shorty She's so good, so hot I was like, mama,
• 2:02:05
  let's play monkey in the mirror. You know me,
• 2:02:07
  I'm a little, I'm a Take a stretch to her legs
• 2:02:10
  like we be You lookin' at the Chico or Jay -Z
• 2:02:13
  Yeah, that's right Damn, I think she wants me
• 2:02:15
  Damn, I think she needs me Damn, I think she
• 2:02:19
  wants me Baby, we easy Damn, look at Shawty,
• 2:02:24
  look at her She's so good, so fine, we are like
• 2:02:28
  this Damn, look at Shawty, Shawty sexy She's
• 2:02:34
  so good, so fine, we are just like this Five
• 2:02:42
  plus five, five times two, ten. I'm tryna give
• 2:03:09
  it to you You're hazardous When you jump in a
• 2:03:12
  ride, you can grab my clutch If you're feeling
• 2:03:15
  that Girl, let's take it to the back We don't
• 2:03:19
  have to leave the spot Stay right in the parking
• 2:03:22
  lot Then it all repeats Sex, sweet, sex, sweet
• 2:03:25
  Oh, damn Look at shorty She was so good as all
• 2:03:30
  Just the way I like it, baby Damn Look at shorty
• 2:03:50
  We are in garbage time right now. Oh, what do
• 2:04:06
  I want to press? Let's do this. All right here.
• 2:04:11
  Hey, it's Scott Rizzuto from The Riz Show in
• 2:04:13
  St. Louis, and you're listening to my man, Ryan
• 2:04:15
  Hoppy, on the Hoppy Hour. Mm -hmm. If this doesn't
• 2:04:19
  make you think, laugh, or yell at your speakers,
• 2:04:22
  are you even listening? Hoppy Hour with Ryan
• 2:04:25
  Hoppy is back. Welcome to Hoppy Hour. Something
• 2:04:40
  completely different. Door is closing. Happy
• 2:05:28
  hour. Happy hour. Ladies and gentlemen, here
• 2:05:37
  it is. The most recent radio show on the planet.
• 2:05:41
  The other stations are tuned in too. The city's
• 2:06:06
  crazy moves Load. This is going to be the show
• 2:06:35
  called Loads. Can this fucking video load already?
• 2:06:39
  Jesus Christ. Been waiting all day. Load. A Sarasota
• 2:06:47
  woman is sentenced to 14 months in federal prison
• 2:06:50
  after making online threats against President
• 2:06:52
  Trump. Loser! As much as I don't like Trump,
• 2:06:55
  what a waste of time. Prosecutors say 41 -year
• 2:06:58
  -old Desiree Sigari posted threatening TikTok
• 2:07:01
  videos, including calls for violence against
• 2:07:03
  MAGA supporters last September. That is a long
• 2:07:06
  time. 14 months for something stupid like that.
• 2:07:08
  She'll regret it. I'm Chad Mills in Tampa, where
• 2:07:12
  negotiations for a new Rays stadium are capturing
• 2:07:15
  the attention of one of Florida's most outspoken,
• 2:07:18
  well -known billionaires, John Morgan. Who's
• 2:07:22
  more annoying, John Morgan or frickin' Rays?
• 2:07:24
  I would still put my money up for baseball, but
• 2:07:27
  only in Orlando. Attorney John Morgan stepping
• 2:07:31
  up to the plate in the sweepstakes for the Tampa
• 2:07:33
  Bay Rays. He's such a boomer. If you asked somebody,
• 2:07:36
  what does a boomer look like? It's John Wayne.
• 2:07:38
  In an interview with Orlando's ABC station, the
• 2:07:41
  billionaire attorney said he's very close with
• 2:07:44
  one of the Rays' new owners, and he'd put up
• 2:07:46
  some of his own money to bring the team to Orlando
• 2:07:50
  if the plan to move the team to Tampa. falls
• 2:07:53
  apart and morgan believes there is a chance that'll
• 2:07:56
  happen it is gonna happen they keep delaying
• 2:07:59
  it it's not necessarily a lock they don't have
• 2:08:01
  the votes over there and the lightning wants
• 2:08:03
  stuff and the bucks want stuff and and this is
• 2:08:06
  where it could still be all right dang i'm fucking
• 2:08:08
  raised to give this shit anymore and there's
• 2:08:12
  this creepy headline let's just mute it load
• 2:08:15
  we're gonna do this together load load Can the
• 2:08:22
  video load? During a stop in downtown Tampa today,
• 2:08:25
  a Republican candidate for governor called for
• 2:08:27
  harsher penalties, harsher penalties, after a
• 2:08:30
  teen takeover Friday night. That wild gathering
• 2:08:33
  led to 22 people, some as young as 12 years old,
• 2:08:37
  facing criminal charges. Well, News Channel 8
• 2:08:41
  political reporter... Bunch of morons. Ty Russell
• 2:08:43
  is here after attending the news conference with
• 2:08:45
  James Fishback. Ty. Yes, they say the Republican
• 2:08:48
  hopeful says teens and young adults need some
• 2:08:51
  tough love after this event here. All right,
• 2:08:54
  so it's that creepy guy, James Fishback. I don't
• 2:08:56
  feel like hearing about him. I'm also getting
• 2:08:58
  a little bit of a caffeine crash. Time for Chicago
• 2:09:00
  news. Six. Yeah. Six mad, but he been in these
• 2:09:24
  mics. All in ten heights, now the Senate get
• 2:09:27
  tight. From the berms to the block, that's a
• 2:09:29
  hell of a hike. Turn the dial, see his name on
• 2:09:32
  the lights. He got callers on the line, trying
• 2:09:35
  to break they news. Side to the sticks, they
• 2:09:37
  relate to the views. Every segment like a story
• 2:09:40
  from the avenue. Slick, then he fat, shake the
• 2:09:43
  ass. What's going on? Could the Democratic National
• 2:10:03
  Convention come back to the Windy City? Or Terrence
• 2:10:06
  Lee breaks down what happened. It's perfect.
• 2:10:07
  By the way. I was in town for the DNC two years
• 2:10:11
  ago when my uncle Ken died and we had the funeral
• 2:10:14
  service in Chicago. It was a beautiful funeral.
• 2:10:16
  Very sad that my uncle died of leukemia. Fuck
• 2:10:18
  DNC! And I was like, you know what? This is when
• 2:10:22
  gas prices were cheaper. I was like, I want to
• 2:10:23
  go to the city and drive around. Of course, I
• 2:10:28
  forgot that the whole city would be shut down
• 2:10:29
  for the DNC, so I was stuck in Chicago traffic.
• 2:10:33
  Happened today, which could impact that decision.
• 2:10:37
  I'm tearing to see what Chicago's bid to do it.
• 2:10:39
  All right, so they'll probably get it. It's a
• 2:10:41
  perfect liberal city for them. They should have
• 2:10:43
  it in like Birmingham, Alabama. Fresno news time.
• 2:10:52
  Even though my Fresno affiliate won't hear this.
• 2:10:56
  Yeah. I'll be on the block dropping facts like
• 2:11:05
  boulders. Words cut sharply, the city on its
• 2:11:07
  shoulders. News so raw, unfiltered truth spray.
• 2:11:11
  Fresno's posting every word that he say. No sugar
• 2:11:13
  coat, no bow, no disguise. I'll be in the booth,
• 2:11:16
  Fresno, here's it live. Oh, Sean! Let me unmute
• 2:12:23
  YouTube. You can do a bingo card of that. Clovis
• 2:12:25
  police are cracking down on young e -bike riders
• 2:12:28
  in the city saying... Man, it sounds like Fresno's
• 2:12:31
  a little similar to Florida. So many e -bikers
• 2:12:34
  are out of control. The spike in recent incidents
• 2:12:37
  has caused their approach to change from education
• 2:12:39
  to accountability. All right, there you go. And
• 2:12:42
  let's end the show with Cleveland News. There's
• 2:12:47
  this weird existential thing I have. Especially
• 2:12:49
  when I'm done with work for the day, which is
• 2:12:51
  probably why I'm prolonging this and been doing
• 2:12:52
  this for two hours and 12 minutes. Mm -hmm. Where
• 2:12:54
  it's like, when it's over with, it's like the
• 2:12:56
  song, when it's over, there's a time I fell in
• 2:12:58
  love again. What I'm saying is like, damn, this
• 2:13:03
  show's almost over with. Mm -hmm. Closer to death.
• 2:13:06
  Ah! Static crackle, mic pops, the hour is hoppy.
• 2:13:19
  Cleveland skyline foggy, steel mills choppy.
• 2:13:22
  City on the Cuyahoga, hearts heavy, never sloppy.
• 2:13:24
  Radio waves carry tales, but they ain't gloves.
• 2:13:27
  Concrete jungle, potholes where dreams collapse.
• 2:13:30
  Downtown echoes the calves and faded calves past
• 2:13:33
  the preaching hustle. Corner kids trading maps
• 2:13:35
  where the vibes Midwest, but the struggle overlaps.
• 2:13:40
  Where the truth gets raw Rust belt blues, every
• 2:13:43
  crack, every flaw Until it takes no sugar, no
• 2:13:46
  draw Hoppy on the mic spittin' facts, no law
• 2:13:49
  Back alleys whisper, still grit in the air Hoppy
• 2:13:53
  pullin' cards, city troops lay bare Bar sharper
• 2:13:56
  than the skyline, no time to spare Opinions heavy
• 2:13:58
  as the lake, but he don't care Radio days, static
• 2:14:02
  hum in the booth Voice boomin' through the speakers,
• 2:14:04
  pittin' with the truth Tower city shadows, echoing
• 2:14:08
  the youth Uncut, unpopped He is the misfit of
• 2:14:30
  radio, and he is fine with that. Welcome back
• 2:14:33
  to Hoppy Hour with Ryan Hoppy. The people behind
• 2:14:40
  me stand up against hate. A vocal and energized
• 2:14:48
  school board meeting in Orange this evening as
• 2:14:51
  parents and community members speak about the
• 2:14:55
  district's investigation after an educator's
• 2:14:57
  alleged anti -Semitic posts on social media.
• 2:15:00
  Man, you are a moron if you're a public figure
• 2:15:02
  educator and you're talking about Jewish people
• 2:15:04
  online. RC New Yorker was in the room. You deserve
• 2:15:07
  to get conked. Join us now with the latest. See
• 2:15:10
  you. Good evening. Good evening, Russ. That special
• 2:15:12
  needs paraprofessional is back to work after
• 2:15:15
  she was put on leave last month as the district
• 2:15:18
  investigated those social media posts. And tonight,
• 2:15:21
  the community addressed the school board directly
• 2:15:24
  and let them know how painful this is. More than
• 2:15:28
  100 people packed Pepper Pike Learning Center
• 2:15:30
  for the Orange City Schools board meeting on
• 2:15:33
  Monday evening. It was the most Ohio thing ever,
• 2:15:35
  a board meeting on Monday with 100 people. Some
• 2:15:38
  of them hanging flyers displaying the reason
• 2:15:40
  why they came. In April, a Brady Middle School
• 2:15:44
  paraprofessional was placed... Definitely not
• 2:15:46
  a professional. ...based on leave due to an alleged
• 2:15:48
  anti -Semitic post on a... Oh, great, and these
• 2:15:51
  morons are teaching our future kids. ...personal
• 2:15:53
  Facebook page. 3 News is not sharing the contents
• 2:15:56
  of the... All right, then I'm not going to play
• 2:15:58
  your fucking clip. Are we that desensitized?
• 2:16:00
  Then what's the context? This news is sad. We
• 2:16:04
  have a passing of note tonight. Longtime public
• 2:16:07
  address announcer for the Cleveland Guardians,
• 2:16:09
  Bob Tayek. has died for nearly three decades.
• 2:16:13
  Bob was the voice of Progressive Field. Tayak
• 2:16:16
  stepped away from the Guardians at the beginning
• 2:16:18
  of this season to deal with some recent health
• 2:16:20
  challenges. No cause of death has been announced.
• 2:16:26
  Tayak was 75 years old. Well, there's the cause.
• 2:16:30
  But in all sincerity, I texted my friend Tony
• 2:16:32
  Mazur, who's on radio in Cleveland, and I've
• 2:16:36
  been on his podcast, Check Your Brain, blah,
• 2:16:38
  blah, blah, da, da, da. He said that he worked
• 2:16:41
  with him in Catholic radio and that he was a
• 2:16:42
  very nice man. So rest in peace. I feel bad talking
• 2:16:45
  about the positives of Cleveland and playing
• 2:16:47
  this collage around here or montage, whatever
• 2:16:50
  it is. Wow. This is a long show. They used to
• 2:17:31
  harbor it here. We think this is ours. It could
• 2:17:34
  be worse, though. At least we're not destroyed.
• 2:17:38
  We're not destroyed. We're not destroyed. You're
• 2:18:06
  looking at your tiny little house that you can't
• 2:18:07
  afford because of the mortgage crisis and your
• 2:18:09
  horrible little sloppy kids who will have diabetes
• 2:18:11
  by the time they're eight because they live on
• 2:18:13
  corn syrup and lye. And then you look at your
• 2:18:17
  big bloated mess of a wife and she waddles towards
• 2:18:19
  you with her front butt spilling out over the
• 2:18:21
  top of her ass and long jeans. And you think,
• 2:18:24
  I'm going to go shoot myself and my pregnant
• 2:18:25
  small girl daughter right now. Do you regret
• 2:18:32
  anything that you said about Cleveland? I didn't
• 2:18:35
  regret it at all. You think Cleveland's cool?
• 2:18:40
  I mean, I've never heard anybody say, I'm going
• 2:18:42
  to Cleveland on vacation. I don't know. What's
• 2:18:46
  so cool about Cleveland? It doesn't matter what
• 2:19:15
  you look like on the outside, whether you're
• 2:19:17
  white or black or a Sasquatch, even. As long
• 2:19:22
  as you follow your dreams, no matter how crazy
• 2:19:25
  or against the law it is. Except for Sasquatch.
• 2:19:29
  If you're Sasquatch, the rules are different.
• 2:19:31
  Forget it, Meatwad. I'm a circus freak. That's
• 2:19:35
  all I'll ever be. Whatever. Finally, I'm one
• 2:19:39
  of those guys who can't wait to get to work in
• 2:19:40
  the morning. Like a dairy cow. Oh! Huh? So if
• 2:20:11
  there's a few bucks left over, you know, go get
• 2:20:14
  something nice. Yeah, hey, I'd like a $9 ,000
• 2:20:17
  project. $10 ,000 ones? Yeah, good. And if you're
• 2:20:23
  gonna help mine, I'll send her up, too. In, like,
• 2:20:26
  20 minutes, I'm gonna be asleep, so get him up
• 2:20:28
  there. I had, like, half a bottle of melatonin,
• 2:20:31
  six beers, this whole f***ing bucket of chicken.
• 2:20:35
  Oh, the Sandman is coming. Oh, no! What scientific
• 2:20:57
  disciplines? Really? Why do you think they call
• 2:21:02
  me Dr. Quinn? I just thought that was a nickname.
• 2:21:06
  You know, like Dr. Gray. God, you're stupid.
• 2:21:16
  God, you're stupid. Hey, shut your ass. What
• 2:21:20
  is it now, Hoop? Have you turned on the TV lately?
• 2:21:23
  No, why? It's in the city. With bonus material.
• 2:21:47
  Beach balls. Woo! Yay! Hooray! Hooray! First
• 2:21:52
  100 callers get a free sack plus your school
• 2:21:54
  sack. Operators are sailing by. You'll be nuts
• 2:21:56
  to pass up on this offer. I mean, someone in
• 2:21:59
  a shirt. In a night light or something. Ooh!
• 2:22:02
  Want to get that fight? Where they put them fire
• 2:22:04
  poppers up your buttholes? Now that's a good...
• 2:22:07
  No, not that specific. But why? That's how I
• 2:22:10
  met your great -grandpappy. Oh, he loves him.
• 2:22:13
  The good butthole. you not never ever not no
• 2:22:16
  damn don't never verbulate that man's name in
• 2:22:18
  the house again. I don't think you said his name.
• 2:22:21
  Someone must wear a little too busy band to exchange
• 2:22:24
  business cards. Don't you go Facebook him on
• 2:22:27
  the iBox neither. Sheriff says you ran from down
• 2:22:30
  hell down to the library. Yeah, you know I did.
• 2:22:32
  You're going strong or you don't go at all. Whoa,
• 2:22:40
  a real live robot. Or is that some on a cheesy
• 2:22:43
  New Year's costume. Bite my shiny metal ass.
• 2:22:48
  It doesn't look so shiny to me. It's shinier
• 2:22:50
  than yours, meatbag. And that is that. Poppy
• 2:23:28
  Hour. Poppy Hour. It's time for Poppy in the
• 2:23:37
  morning. RyanHockeyRadio .com Poppy Hour will
• 2:23:44
  be right back. You're probably going to talk
• 2:23:46
  about As a reminder, if you don't feel like listening
• 2:24:00
  to this next song, you can skip over it. But
• 2:24:02
  Ryan Hoppy of Hoppy Hour takes pride in his selection,
• 2:24:05
  so stick around, folks. I leave. you buy Cheeky
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  Mouthguards at GetCheeky .com. When I tell you
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  on my website. RyanHoppyRadio .com. R -Y -A -N
• 2:30:53
  -H -O -P -P -E -Radio .com. I would hope you
• 2:30:57
  know how to spell radio. Or it's... to my podcast
• 2:31:00
  section. So whenever you listen to Hoppy Hour
• 2:31:03
  like you are right now in the podcast description
• 2:31:06
  is all of that. We're going to come back on Hoppy
• 2:31:11
  Hour and keep this party going and going. But
• 2:31:17
  let's hear it from Aaron Hank. You can hear The
• 2:31:21
  Hammerin' Hank Show with Henry Oaks and Ryan
• 2:31:23
  Hoppe on Spotify by searching up Hammerin', A
• 2:31:26
  -J -M -M -E -R -I -N, Hank Show, and check it
• 2:31:29
  out on his podcast feed. People with autism are
• 2:31:33
  often treated like they are different. Believe
• 2:31:35
  me, we are. Hi, this is Henry Oaks, but my buddies
• 2:31:39
  may have known me as Hammerin' Hank. I was labeled
• 2:31:42
  as slow when I started school. Come to find out
• 2:31:45
  at the age of 12. The doctors decided I was autistic.
• 2:31:48
  Now at the age of 48, I have completed an associate's
• 2:31:51
  degree in radio broadcasting and worked in the
• 2:31:54
  San Francisco Bay Area as an on -air personality.
• 2:31:57
  So yes, I am different. People of autism have
• 2:32:00
  no needs no different than you. Laugh, laugh,
• 2:32:03
  love, and learn to gain education and join the
• 2:32:07
  workforce. I did it, and so can anyone else of
• 2:32:11
  autism. Work with them. Find out for yourself
• 2:32:18
  that autism isn't a disease, it's a condition.
• 2:32:21
  To find out more about autism, please visit autismspeaks
• 2:32:26
  .org. Autism Speaks. It's time to listen. Hoping
• 2:32:57
  and praying that one day I'm gonna make it No
• 2:33:01
  matter what, I keep coming strong I got my eyes
• 2:33:06
  on the prize and I'm gonna take it I'm never
• 2:33:11
  realizing for what it's all to be today I wanna
• 2:33:17
  say the lights are out so let's get it started
• 2:33:21
  I'm here Together we keep breaking the ground
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  you live in Florida or Maryland, go to counselingoncall
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  .net and there you go. We're gonna come back
• 2:37:45
  and I'm gonna keep this party going. Hello again.
• 2:37:48
  It's your favorite San Francisco DJ, Hammer and
• 2:37:51
  Ink. I may look normal, but the truth is I have
• 2:37:54
  a condition called autism. That's right. It's
• 2:37:57
  a condition, not a disease. That is, autism can
• 2:38:01
  strike anyone, regardless of who they are. People
• 2:38:04
  with autism normally have difficulties in verbal
• 2:38:06
  and nonverbal communication skills, social interactions,
• 2:38:10
  and leisure activities. In a recent study...
• 2:38:23
  I have even worked in the San Francisco Bay Area
• 2:38:25
  as an honorary personality for many years. Always
• 2:38:28
  remember that people with autism want the same
• 2:38:30
  things as you, to be happy and successful. To
• 2:38:33
  find out more about autism, please contact your
• 2:38:36
  local mental health center or visit autismspeech
• 2:38:39
  .org. This is Cameron Hanks and I appreciate
• 2:38:41
  your kindness. Thanks for watching! is coming
• 2:39:23
  to a close Outro Music Like clockwork to a show
• 2:40:14
  Now it's time to face the silence Like the TV
• 2:40:16
  on Snow Riot Hoppy held the mic With humor so
• 2:40:19
  divine The void left in our hearts Wider than
• 2:40:22
  a canyon line Line Empty speakers dilatate But
• 2:40:31
  coming to an end Like a rollercoaster stopping
• 2:40:33
  How the rivers bend Hoppy's jokes and jabs He's
• 2:40:36
  our daily grind Now silence will remember Thoughts
• 2:40:39
  we can't rewind Hope to Hoppy I already Laughter
• 2:40:46
  and joy, dissolving in the air But we'll keep
• 2:40:49
  the rhythm, oh life's just so unfair I'll be
• 2:40:52
  alright, coming to a close Radio waves, it's
• 2:40:56
  like a welcome rose Laughter and joy, dissolving
• 2:40:59
  in the air But we'll keep the rhythm, oh life's
• 2:41:02
  just so unfair And like that, he's gone. You
• 2:41:23
  probably had Taco Bell before. Whenever we're
• 2:41:25
  going outside, all I smell is poop. I'll catch
• 2:41:30
  you in the next, and we'll call it a day. Poppy
• 2:41:34
  Hour is now over. Poppy Hour is now over. This
• 2:41:59
  concludes our broadcast day. Good night, and
• 2:42:03
  God bless America.