Latest / 5–Minute Parenting: Tips to Help You Raise Competent, Godly Kids. / A Fun Object Lesson on the Character Quality of Kindness w/ Guest Ellen Kolman

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A Fun Object Lesson on the Character Quality of Kindness w/ Guest Ellen Kolman · 5–Minute Parenting: Tips to Help You Raise Competent, Godly Kids.

• 0:01
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to another episode of the Five Minute Parenting Podcast.
• 0:05
  SPEAKER_00: I'm your host, Karen Ferguson, wife, mom, grandmom, and children's book author, with a background in K-A education and a passion for equipping parents to raise confident and God-confident kids.
• 0:18
  SPEAKER_00: In this podcast, we'll cover parenting practices for both a practical view and a biblical view.
• 0:23
  SPEAKER_00: Our goal is to help you raise kids with a positive, godly self-image so they can become all they were created to be.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_00: I know you're busy, so we'll keep it short.
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_00: Let's take just five minutes and dive in.
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to another episode of Five Minute Parenting.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_00: Today I have a very special guest on the show, author and veteran children's teacher, Ellen Coleman.
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_00: Ellen is an Ohio native and award-winning author, driven by a passion to teach children the love of Jesus.
• 0:57
  SPEAKER_00: She's been teaching and entertaining children in the church and Christian school settings for more than 35 years.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_00: Her young students inspired her to write stories to help them understand kindness, forgiveness, empathy, and friendship.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_00: Her published works include Seeds of Sunshine and Sunshine Makes a Difference, both published in 2024 with two more books under contract, Lenny's Team and Krabby Abbey the Decorator.
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_00: Ellen and her husband Andy have five adult children, three grandchildren, and a little white dog named Chip.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_00: Ellen, welcome to the show.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_00: I love it.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_00: And you know, I'm so glad to have you here today.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_00: I know that you have something special to share with parents today about praying specific character qualities over our kids with a focus for today's show on kindness.
• 1:52
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm gonna let you jump right in.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_01: All right.
• 1:56
  SPEAKER_01: Well, thank you.
• 1:56
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, um, I'm Ellen Coleman and I'm really excited about being here.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_01: And um I've always uh felt since our children were little that it is very important to pray for our kids and now our grandkids and tell them often, you know, I am praying for you, that we are praying for them.
• 2:16
  SPEAKER_01: And uh one of the things that I learned uh in church when my husband and I were young uh to actually pray scripture over our kids.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_01: And one that I like to use is from the book of Colossians, Colossians chapter one, verses nine and ten.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_01: And wherever um the verses say you, then I insert their name.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_01: So today I'm gonna uh choose my granddaughter Kendra, and I'll just insert her name.
• 2:44
  SPEAKER_01: So it goes like this.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_01: For this reason, we also, since the day we heard it, do not cease to pray for Kendra and ask that Kendra may be filled with the knowledge of his will in all wisdom and spiritual understanding, that Kendra may walk worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing him, being fruitful in every good work, and increasing in the knowledge of God.
• 3:10
  SPEAKER_01: And uh today I want to focus on a specific character quality that uh maybe you've been focusing on at home as a family, and that's kindness.
• 3:20
  SPEAKER_01: Um, Ephesians 432 says, and be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.
• 3:32
  SPEAKER_01: The characteristics of kindness are selflessness.
• 3:37
  SPEAKER_01: Being kind means putting others above ourselves, uh, compassion.
• 3:44
  SPEAKER_01: Being kind means having empathy for others that were tenderhearted.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_01: Being kind means uh showing mercy, it means forgiving others.
• 3:56
  SPEAKER_01: Uh when uh when we forgive others, we are showing mercy and we are being merciful and we are also being kind.
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_01: Uh being kind is also a Christ-like character.
• 4:07
  SPEAKER_01: Kindness is an action that displays uh Christ-like character.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, we know that God is forgiving and God is kind.
• 4:17
  SPEAKER_01: Now, um I taught uh kindergarten and first grade in a Christian school, and there's actually a combined classroom.
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_01: And uh I taught that uh for for quite a few years.
• 4:29
  SPEAKER_01: And um, you know, kindness can be a tough one for little kids, you know, it's always like be kind, be kind.
• 4:36
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, well, what does that mean?
• 4:38
  SPEAKER_01: And how how can we make that um so that they really understand it and understand when they're unkind what that means?
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_01: And so this is not unique to me.
• 4:50
  SPEAKER_01: I actually found this a long time ago on Pinterest, so I can't take credit for it, but it's really good.
• 4:57
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, so first of all, um I get cotton balls and I start throwing cotton balls at them, you know, and I'm like, does that hurt?
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_01: Does that hurt you?
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_01: Can a cotton ball hurt you?
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_01: And they're like, no.
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_01: I go, why not?
• 5:12
  SPEAKER_01: Tell me about the cotton ball.
• 5:14
  SPEAKER_01: And they're like, because they're soft and they're skishy, you know, that's right.
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_01: You know, cotton balls are soft and skishy and they can never hurt.
• 5:23
  SPEAKER_01: I can throw cotton balls at you all day long, and none of them will hurt.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_01: And I said, kind words are like cotton balls, kind words are soft and they're they're comforting and and and they they they give you warm feelings.
• 5:42
  SPEAKER_01: And so kind words are like cotton balls.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_01: We want to be like a cotton ball.
• 5:48
  SPEAKER_01: Now, on the other hand, um, and I borrowed this from Mr.
• 5:52
  SPEAKER_01: Coleman, my husband, this is a piece of sandpaper, and I would say, What's sandpaper like?
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_01: And I would pass around uh little pieces of sandpaper so they can, you know, touch it and they'll say, Oh, that's rough, you know, that's scratchy, you know, and I'd say, that's right.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_01: Um, sandpaper is used for you know, rubbing on things to get the rough edges out and make them smooth.
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_01: And um I said, now sandpaper can hurt.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_01: So, like if you rub uh like sandpaper on your skin, you know, it actually leaves uh leaves a mark.
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_01: And I said, mean words are like sandpaper.
• 6:34
  SPEAKER_01: Um, they may not leave scratches on our skin, but they leave scratches on our feelings.
• 6:40
  SPEAKER_01: So when we use words that are mean or unkind or uh unfriendly, you know, I don't want to be your friend, I can't play with you, you can't sit by me.
• 6:49
  SPEAKER_01: So when you say those things, those put those put scratch marks on our feelings, and we don't want to do that.
• 6:55
  SPEAKER_01: So then I would always tell the kids, so are we gonna are we gonna be a cotton ball?
• 7:00
  SPEAKER_01: Are we gonna be sandpaper?
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_01: And they always say, cotton balls, want to be a cotton ball.
• 7:05
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, good.
• 7:07
  SPEAKER_01: So like as I observe, you know, in the room, I'd be like, uh, uh, uh, are you being cotton ball right now?
• 7:13
  SPEAKER_01: Are you being a cotton ball?
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_01: You know, so let's remember kind words are like cotton ball.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_01: And mean words are like sandpaper, and we don't want to put scratches on people's feelings, we want to make everybody, you know, feel happy.
• 7:28
  SPEAKER_01: So then another thing, um in the first book I wrote, Seeds of Sunshine, I uh use as an object lesson in the book um dandelion puffs.
• 7:41
  SPEAKER_01: We all know the dandelion flower, it's yellow, we love it.
• 7:44
  SPEAKER_01: And then when when that flower goes away, it makes that fun puff.
• 7:47
  SPEAKER_01: It's almost like a toy in your yard, you know, where you pick it up and you go, and then all the seeds go everywhere, and it's so much fun.
• 7:54
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I don't have one of those today, but I do have bubbles, and bubbles do about the same thing.
• 7:59
  SPEAKER_01: So the idea is is that when we blow bubbles or the puffs, they they go everywhere.
• 8:08
  SPEAKER_01: And our words are like dandelion puffs or bubbles that that whoever is around us, whoever hears our words, our words are are falling all around everyone who can hear them.
• 8:23
  SPEAKER_01: And so do we want our words to uh spread joy, happiness, peace, encouragement, or do we want our words to uh fall and cause uh hurt feelings, or uh make someone angry, or someone feel bad about themselves?
• 8:44
  SPEAKER_01: And so um, so in the book, it's um dandelion seeds, and so I say, do we want to sow seeds of kindness, or do we want to make pretty flowers, or do we want to sow seeds that are gonna make weeds and and people feel bad and angry?
• 9:03
  SPEAKER_01: And of course, we want to uh sow seeds of kindness and and make people happy, and it's only through the power of the Lord Jesus that we can uh consistently do that, and so not every and not everybody is kind all the time, and that's where you know the great words, I'm really sorry, come in.
• 9:25
  SPEAKER_01: I am sorry for for saying that, you know, that's where that comes in, and then uh we can practice forgiveness.
• 9:32
  SPEAKER_01: So uh my prayer for all of you is that um hopefully cotton balls and sandpaper and bubbles will be a good reminder to uh use to use kind words and to uh build up those that are around you.
• 9:53
  SPEAKER_01: And that's all I have for today.
• 9:55
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, this is awesome, Ellen.
• 9:57
  SPEAKER_00: I just love it.
• 9:58
  SPEAKER_00: It's it's these object lessons that are so important to kids, right?
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_00: It gets their attention, it helps them to remember.
• 10:06
  SPEAKER_00: And um, I just I think it's fantastic.
• 10:08
  SPEAKER_00: And then thank you for sharing this with parents and grandparents um who can use these practical object lessons with their kiddos.
• 10:17
  SPEAKER_00: And you know, you have a ton of experience working with kids, uh 35 years.
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_00: So that's do you have anything on your website?
• 10:26
  SPEAKER_00: Have you like compiled, you know, um things like this when it comes to object lessons and things for sharing with parents?
• 10:34
  SPEAKER_00: Or is that maybe in the future?
• 10:38
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe in the future.
• 10:40
  SPEAKER_00: I was gonna say a free download or something, but yeah, because with your with your experience there and just just with this lesson itself, I could just see how this would be such a help to people.
• 10:52
  SPEAKER_00: But what I do know is you have links to your books on your website, correct?
• 10:56
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, I do.
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_01: And uh a button to uh um join my newsletter, follow my newsletter or get my yes, there's a there's a button or a thing you fill out, and then you can get my newsletter.
• 11:10
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, awesome.
• 11:11
  SPEAKER_00: Well, I just want to thank you so much, Ellen, for being here and sharing this object lesson with parents and listeners.
• 11:18
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you for being here.
• 11:19
  SPEAKER_00: Be sure to check out our show notes because we're gonna have a link to Ellen's website um to her books and any other resources that we're discussed today.
• 11:28
  SPEAKER_00: So thank you again for being here and join us next week for another episode of five minute parenting.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_00: Until next time, have a blessed week.