Latest / Beyond Limits With Olivia Marie / Money, Power & Self-Worth: Why Success Alone Will Never Be Enough Ft. Shermin Lakha

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Money, Power & Self-Worth: Why Success Alone Will Never Be Enough Ft. Shermin Lakha · Beyond Limits With Olivia Marie

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_01: Welcome to Beyond Limits, the podcast designed to unlock your highest potential with powerful strategies, energetic frequencies, and mindset shifts to create a limitless life.
• 0:12
  SPEAKER_01: Each episode dives deep into what it really takes to build a life and business beyond the ordinary standard.
• 0:19
  SPEAKER_01: Expect unfiltered conversations, tangible takeaways, and mind-blowing insights to shift your reality.
• 0:25
  SPEAKER_01: You'll hear from Trailblazers who have shattered ceilings and know what it means to live beyond limits.
• 0:31
  SPEAKER_01: And they're here to share their expertise with you.
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_01: Get ready to redefine what's possible when you go all in.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_01: More than a podcast, this is your gateway to building a limitless life and business.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_01: Tune into the Beyond Limits podcast and step into all that is possible.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_01: Hey everyone, welcome back to Beyond Limits.
• 0:51
  SPEAKER_01: I am so excited for today's guest because she has not only started her own female lawyer firm, but she also has an agency.
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_01: She's the co-founder of Connected Table.
• 1:03
  SPEAKER_01: She's an all-around badass woman that you need to know.
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_01: And with that, welcome to the show.
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_00: Hi, thank you so much for having me.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_00: Great intro.
• 1:13
  SPEAKER_00: Thanks.
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_01: So for people who don't know you, introduce yourself, who you are, what you do, and we'll kind of like dive in from there.
• 1:19
  SPEAKER_01: Cause I feel like there's so much to you that like I want to ask and dive into.
• 1:23
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, absolutely.
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_00: So I am the founder of Level Up Legal.
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_00: It's a women-owned law firm and we focus on startups, brands.
• 1:30
  SPEAKER_00: We work with a lot of content creators.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_00: So brands from your favorite content creators.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_00: And I also have a creative agency called Tiger Tiger.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_00: It started as a live shopping agency, but now it's where we really curate and represent a lot of like incredible thought leaders in their brand deals.
• 1:49
  SPEAKER_00: We're actually disrupting the entire agency structure where we don't take a 20% fee for things that we don't source.
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_00: We actually just help negotiate on our hourly rate.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_00: So for those creators who have huge deals, it's an incredible benefit.
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_00: And then as you said, I started, I co-founded the connected table.
• 2:11
  SPEAKER_00: And that is to connect incredible women like yourself to other great women as well.
• 2:17
  SPEAKER_00: We actually had a co-ed one recently, but it's really just to network outside of the standard format.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_00: It's really about touching face with people beyond business and kind of taking out that icky sense of networking.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_01: I got no ick last night.
• 2:33
  SPEAKER_01: There was not an ounce of ick last night.
• 2:36
  SPEAKER_00: It was I love that because you know when we first started networking, like that was always when we were younger, like network, network, network.
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_00: It's like almost a dirty word.
• 2:43
  SPEAKER_00: And now it's like people love that term.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_00: Like I love to network, and now we're like, hmm, it's not even a dirty term more.
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_00: It's more of like, we're tired of that.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm so glad that you just got to connect.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_00: That's the new word.
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_01: Put me on for the next one.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_01: Yes.
• 2:59
  SPEAKER_01: And with that me, I want to dive into the lawyer first because I know like your background in it, but what made you start your own firm?
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_01: What made you kind of go down that road?
• 3:10
  SPEAKER_01: And how did you become known as like the Lux lawyer?
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_00: I love that you're calling me that.
• 3:14
  SPEAKER_00: Uh so I kind of did everything you were supposed to do in order to get the big law job, which is what most people go to law school for.
• 3:22
  SPEAKER_00: So my first job was at the US attorney's office.
• 3:24
  SPEAKER_00: And then I was at a big law firm and I was also at Goldman.
• 3:28
  SPEAKER_00: So I did all the right things.
• 3:30
  SPEAKER_00: And when I was a year into the big law job, I was like, I just can't, this isn't who I am.
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, you know what?
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just gonna quit.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_00: I've been working my whole life to try to get here.
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_00: I'm unhappy.
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_00: And I know that sounds very risky, which it was at the time, but my family was really supportive and they were like, you know, you have your education.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_00: So worst case, you can just go back and get a job somewhere else if you're that unhappy.
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_00: And then I had friends who were in the creative space and they were asking me to review contracts for them or help them out.
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, let me just do this the right way.
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_00: So I put up a website and I started marketing on social media, and not because it was something that everyone else was doing, but really because I had no money at the time and it was a free resource.
• 4:14
  SPEAKER_00: So in 2019, I was marketing my services, and that's how I grew the practice.
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_00: Um it started growing and growing.
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_00: And um, yeah, we still get all of our clients from social and marketing that way.
• 4:27
  SPEAKER_00: And one of the biggest things that I wanted to do was I didn't want to go back to the person I was, the person that felt like I was just pushing paper and wasn't passionate about what I'm doing.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and so I really wanted to combine a lifestyle where I had freedom, and that as a woman, there I truly believe there is no correlation between how successful you are and how seriously you can take work and how you look and what your passions are.
• 4:58
  SPEAKER_00: Like those two things can combine in the same person.
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_00: And as someone who is in a traditional role as a lawyer, I'm trying to break that mold.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_00: You know, if I like to live a luxe lifestyle, it doesn't mean that I'm not a credible attorney.
• 5:14
  SPEAKER_00: And I think shifting that mindset is really important.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_00: That's what I really strive to do.
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_01: What kind of law?
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_01: Because I know you talk a lot about online in terms of IP and trademarks, is that mainly what you guys focus on?
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_00: So the firm mainly focuses on business and IP law.
• 5:30
  SPEAKER_00: So anything from starting your business, like filing it.
• 5:33
  SPEAKER_00: We work with a lot of businesses in Canada who want to operate in the US too, and then doing trademarks, protecting your IP.
• 5:39
  SPEAKER_00: But I actually specialize in early stage and pre-seed investment advice.
• 5:42
  SPEAKER_00: So if there's a business that wants to raise capital, they come to me and I kind of help advise them.
• 5:48
  SPEAKER_00: And that's really my zone of genius is really looking at a business and saying, okay, like these are the things that you really need to do to scale.
• 5:57
  SPEAKER_00: So not only legal, and I've done it myself too from my businesses.
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_00: I can actually take the things that people feel insecure about in their business sense and help them feel more secure.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_00: And that's also why I have um equity in a bunch of businesses too.
• 6:13
  SPEAKER_01: Do you find there's a common pattern or a common thing that happens when these people are coming to you, these new companies are coming to you?
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_01: Like, oh, this tends to be a recurring pattern, or this is a common gap, or this is a common thing that is going on for people.
• 6:26
  SPEAKER_00: Honestly, it's always about money, I have to say.
• 6:29
  SPEAKER_00: And I work with a lot of underrepresented founders and female founders.
• 6:33
  SPEAKER_00: And a lot of it, it really stems from worth and asking for funding.
• 6:38
  SPEAKER_00: And it kind of stems into how they feel, I think, internally.
• 6:42
  SPEAKER_00: So as a lawyer, you're also like a side therapist sometimes.
• 6:46
  SPEAKER_00: Always.
• 6:46
  SPEAKER_00: And so I have found that when people are fundraising, they really are in like they're getting rejected a lot.
• 6:55
  SPEAKER_00: It's almost like dating, right?
• 6:56
  SPEAKER_00: It brings up everything.
• 6:57
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and they're asking and they don't know how to make sure that they're, you know, telling people what their worth is or how to like just sit back in it.
• 7:05
  SPEAKER_00: So it's this whole, you know, game, not game, but um is it a game?
• 7:09
  SPEAKER_00: It's exercise and self-worth.
• 7:11
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 7:11
  SPEAKER_00: It's a power thing.
• 7:12
  SPEAKER_00: It's a game.
• 7:13
  SPEAKER_00: It is.
• 7:13
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but I think that happens in not even just, you know, startups who are seeking capital, but women or people who are trying to price themselves and their businesses or you know, learning their worth.
• 7:24
  SPEAKER_01: Um, it's a common thread.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_01: How did you learn your worth?
• 7:27
  SPEAKER_01: Because I know you've spoken a lot about, you know, whether it's self-love or just knowing your worth and whether you're showing up in terms of raising capital or just running your own company, how have you been able to master that to become so successful?
• 7:39
  SPEAKER_00: Honestly, it's been like a whole process.
• 7:42
  SPEAKER_00: Like I think that when I first started, I was doing a lot of things that I probably should have charged more for.
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_00: And I had my guy friends tell me, they were like, you know, Shermaen, I wouldn't do half the stuff you do.
• 7:54
  SPEAKER_00: And, you know, I would charge double.
• 7:56
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 7:57
  SPEAKER_00: And honestly, that made me feel terrible because I was like, I don't know how to charge my worth.
• 8:02
  SPEAKER_00: And to this day, I think I still struggle with that because I love, I love the gab.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_00: I love to like meet people and I love to kind of help them.
• 8:10
  SPEAKER_00: But I do think that's also kind of the secret sauce and why people trust me and hire me and I have why I have been successful.
• 8:17
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, in New York City, there's thousands of lawyers, if not tens of thousands.
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_00: How was I able, as a minority woman under the age of 30, able to launch a firm?
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_00: It's I did the work and I showed up for people.
• 8:31
  SPEAKER_00: And because of that, now people want to work with me.
• 8:33
  SPEAKER_00: So it's a it's a push and pull.
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_00: I don't think I'm a hundred percent successful at fully claiming my worth, but I also think I'm happy and I'm, you know, it's always, you know, we're hard on ourselves, I think, from the outside perspective and compared to some people, yes, I'm doing amazing and I'm so blessed.
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_00: But I do work a lot.
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_00: So finding the balance is still something I'm working on too.
• 8:56
  SPEAKER_01: In all of that, are there things that you do regularly that you feel help you either stay anchored in your worth or help you be confident, whether you're like negotiating, whether you're showing up on meetings?
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_01: Because I'm assuming you're doing a lot of that, you know, for the client or forward-facing.
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_01: Like, how do you do you have like a power pose?
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_01: Do you have something that you do beforehand or like some sort of routine?
• 9:21
  SPEAKER_00: So it's so interesting because women are always the best proponents of other women.
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_00: Like we can negotiate really well for other people.
• 9:30
  SPEAKER_00: And we see that in our friendships and everything, but for ourselves, it's not as um, it's not as easy.
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_00: So when I'm representing my clients, I feel so confident in like sitting back and hearing the other person.
• 9:43
  SPEAKER_00: That's the biggest key in negotiation is to listen and make sure you're hearing everything and responding.
• 9:49
  SPEAKER_00: It's kind of like, how do you sell this pen?
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_00: And what I realized is that owning a business, 100% of anything anyone does is sales, whether it's the way you look, how you speak, how you're representing people, you have to get people to trust you at a certain level.
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that's what I'm really good at is that I'm able to, I'm really good at sales and marketing, but from a position of power.
• 10:11
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know how I got that good at that, but it's working for sure.
• 10:14
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I'm trying to also like it's funny, they people say that the line of money and power and uh career is the same lines of love.
• 10:25
  SPEAKER_00: And so I am I have a lot of abundance here and I'm working on my abundance there, but I think being able to channel it in different areas is the key.
• 10:35
  SPEAKER_00: So for people who are trying to like be a little more stronger in their confidence, and especially with negotiating, and you're if you're good at love and you can do that, like channel that energy back and forth.
• 10:46
  SPEAKER_01: Well, it is a similar energy, right?
• 10:48
  SPEAKER_01: Like if you're anxiously attached in business or with money, you're probably also anxiously attached in love.
• 10:53
  SPEAKER_01: Like they're the same thing.
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_01: So what helps you in one will help you be like secure attached, not you know, giving enough, more just like laid back versus like I need you to love me, or like I need you for this deal.
• 11:07
  SPEAKER_01: You'll probably end up not bending over backwards in the deal and then also not settling in love.
• 11:11
  SPEAKER_01: Like the two are it's like you know your worth in all area.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_00: Completely.
• 11:15
  SPEAKER_00: Like I had a call today with somebody, and I could tell that it was a man.
• 11:20
  SPEAKER_00: Actually, 60% of my clients are clients are men.
• 11:22
  SPEAKER_00: But wow, yeah.
• 11:24
  SPEAKER_00: A lot of men want to work with, I mean, I don't know the full reason, but you know, it is a lot of I think women are more empathetic, and I do think that men actually want to be heard.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_00: So when I do these consultations, I love to listen to like a lot of their pain points.
• 11:40
  SPEAKER_00: And it's interesting because as a woman, you can kind of understand what they're looking for and they don't feel this huge, like almost like they're competing with somebody.
• 11:49
  SPEAKER_00: Um, so it's been, it's been really interesting and understanding that power dynamic too.
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, because I wanted to ask you about like power as a woman, whether you're dealing with men, especially in corporate or in some of those, and I'm sure you have in the past, how have you really mastered power as a woman, like in the feminine energy way without feeling like, oh, I need to like be like a man or I need to be masculine?
• 12:12
  SPEAKER_01: Like, how have you been able to do that?
• 12:14
  SPEAKER_01: Or was there maybe a time where you thought you couldn't and then you learned?
• 12:18
  SPEAKER_00: So, this whole conversation about masculinity and femininity and stepping into your feminine and not being masculine, I honestly don't really believe it.
• 12:27
  SPEAKER_00: I think that there's always a balance and a pendulum.
• 12:29
  SPEAKER_00: And I call myself like a femme fatale because I present very feminine and I can understand feminine power, but I do believe that when people can coin me as masculine or feminine, but I don't think that I fit into either.
• 12:45
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that channeling both at the right time and knowing timing is really important.
• 12:51
  SPEAKER_00: I feel like a lot of women are down on themselves because they feel like if we're career-oriented or we're strong, then we're gonna be coined as, oh, you're masculine.
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_00: I almost want to take this out of the conversation, take that out of the conversation completely.
• 13:03
  SPEAKER_00: It's all my content about masculine, feminine energy.
• 13:06
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that we should embrace both and learn to use it in our power.
• 13:11
  SPEAKER_00: When it comes to negotiating, I actually think being more feminine works in my favor.
• 13:16
  SPEAKER_00: So sitting back and listening and then approaching things from that perspective versus in a like hardcore perspective.
• 13:25
  SPEAKER_00: And yeah, I think it's a mix of both, but I like having both.
• 13:30
  SPEAKER_01: Oh no, I think for sure you need both, but also different parts come out, like you said, in different timing.
• 13:35
  SPEAKER_01: It's knowing when you're leaning more into masculine, when to lean more into feminine, but not even liberties like, I'm gonna be my masculine.
• 13:41
  SPEAKER_01: It's like, let me flow here.
• 13:43
  SPEAKER_01: Now let me go into here.
• 13:44
  SPEAKER_01: Work is always gonna probably require me to be more masculine.
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_01: We're doing things in our business in relationships.
• 13:49
  SPEAKER_01: Hopefully, we're going more into our feminine, right?
• 13:51
  SPEAKER_01: When we're in romantic ones.
• 13:54
  SPEAKER_01: But I think sometimes women think they need to be one or the other, and then they end up pendulum swinging.
• 13:58
  SPEAKER_01: So they go for the hyper masculine all the way into the feminine because they thought that the masculine aspects were bad, but it was only because they were pendulum swing to one end.
• 14:08
  SPEAKER_01: But if you were to just not over-correct onto the other end and just kind of bring some back, then you'll find this beautiful medium where both are allowed and actually both are needed.
• 14:17
  SPEAKER_00: Completely.
• 14:18
  SPEAKER_00: And I also think just authentically being who you are.
• 14:22
  SPEAKER_00: So I was going through this phase where I was hearing all the stuff about being more feminine, and I'm like, oh my God, I'm I'm pretty masculine.
• 14:30
  SPEAKER_00: And I was trying to almost like unnaturally be more feminine, and I'm like, this is just not who I am.
• 14:36
  SPEAKER_00: So what I need to do is do what makes me happy.
• 14:39
  SPEAKER_00: And that's being the most feminine.
• 14:41
  SPEAKER_00: If it's you're not having fun doing it and you're not happy while you're doing it, and it's making you feel uncomfortable, like that right there, I think is masculine in itself.
• 14:49
  SPEAKER_00: So even if I'm negotiating a deal, I love that.
• 14:52
  SPEAKER_00: I love negotiating deals.
• 14:53
  SPEAKER_00: I love making money.
• 14:55
  SPEAKER_00: I think it's fun.
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_00: And so if I'm enjoying doing it and I'm not feeling forced or like, oh, like sweating about it, then right, even though I'm doing something that's technically masculine, I'm operating out of a place of who I am authentically, whether that is more feminine or more masculine.
• 15:14
  SPEAKER_00: But lately I'm just rethinking my definition of success.
• 15:18
  SPEAKER_00: And that is just if it's not having fun doing it, it's not worth it.
• 15:22
  SPEAKER_00: I worked too hard and I did the groundwork, trust me, like all the unfun stuff to get to where I am.
• 15:27
  SPEAKER_00: Where now it's like no amount, actually, some amounts, but not a lot of money can make me do something that I'm not having fun doing.
• 15:35
  SPEAKER_01: I like that you brought in different definitions of success.
• 15:38
  SPEAKER_01: What do you feel like has changed what you've been thinking about lately in terms of what that means to you?
• 15:43
  SPEAKER_00: So I always say that my definition of success is having a really small bag.
• 15:48
  SPEAKER_00: I am just a bag lady carrying my laptop and my tripod and all of that.
• 15:54
  SPEAKER_00: I want to have like a really thoughtful time into where I'm going and what I'm doing and not filling up my day in unthoughtful ways.
• 16:03
  SPEAKER_00: Um, so that is my definition of success from like a long-term perspective.
• 16:08
  SPEAKER_00: But yeah, it's just, you know, having fun doing things.
• 16:12
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, a lot of us, but given that, I did a lot of groundwork to get to where I was.
• 16:18
  SPEAKER_00: I did a lot of testing and unf I guess unfun things, but I looking back, it was still fun.
• 16:23
  SPEAKER_00: Um, a lot of things to get to where I am.
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_00: But yeah, I just I think having fun.
• 16:31
  SPEAKER_01: What do you think gave you the permission to basically have fun?
• 16:34
  SPEAKER_01: Because I'm assuming if you were to stay at the traditional, you weren't building your own, you probably weren't gonna be having as much fun as you are right now.
• 16:43
  SPEAKER_01: Definitely not.
• 16:44
  SPEAKER_01: That's why I'm the Lux lawyer.
• 16:46
  SPEAKER_01: So I feel like some people they don't give themselves a permission to have fun.
• 16:50
  SPEAKER_01: So it may not be like, okay, they love law, like you love law, but it just in a different format, in a different way, but they don't give themselves permission to have fun with that same thing and they think very limited, and it's like, well, if I'm doing this, it has to be this way.
• 17:03
  SPEAKER_01: What allowed you to like expand your mind, or maybe you've just always been very like open?
• 17:08
  SPEAKER_00: So I've always been very open and a little different and a little bit creative, given that I'm in, you know, more of a traditional field.
• 17:14
  SPEAKER_00: And I think for the women who are in accounting or law or finance, it's tough because you feel like maybe there isn't a lot of creativity there, um, or you're you know stuck in a certain position, or even if you're in marketing or advertising, you're under a brand, you're under an umbrella.
• 17:33
  SPEAKER_00: But I think for me, it really was discovering what I'm good at, which is I don't love the law per se, but I love to build.
• 17:43
  SPEAKER_00: I love building businesses, whether it's my own or helping somebody else from the ideation phase.
• 17:49
  SPEAKER_00: And I do think it's a lot about simplifying it.
• 17:52
  SPEAKER_00: So when I was quitting my job, obviously I was panicking.
• 17:56
  SPEAKER_00: And I think it was my dad who was like, well, the worst case scenario is that you would just go back and get another job.
• 18:02
  SPEAKER_00: And uh I was like, Yeah, actually, you know, that's all I have to do is I'm gonna be in the same position as I was had I not tried.
• 18:11
  SPEAKER_00: And not trying is the worst position to be in.
• 18:14
  SPEAKER_00: I think a lot of us get our own wage about our own way about our age, about you know, financial security.
• 18:20
  SPEAKER_00: I was lucky I was 29, so I didn't have too many expenses, but I did have enough saved and I did know that if things got dire, I could just go back and get a job.
• 18:29
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I think breaking it down into simple terms, you know, even starting a podcast, for example, it really is.
• 18:37
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, it's a lot of work, as I told you, um, from what I know, but even as simple as taking the time out and being like, okay, if I do X A B C, I will get XYZ.
• 18:47
  SPEAKER_00: Uh so breaking that down into terms is the best way to do it and finding the creativity in everything.
• 18:53
  SPEAKER_00: Um, social media is a great creative outlet as long as we don't get in our own way.
• 18:59
  SPEAKER_00: Is this where your motto of like why not me comes from?
• 19:02
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, honestly, I always say that.
• 19:05
  SPEAKER_00: So yeah, I I posted uh that piece of content when I first started because exactly that.
• 19:11
  SPEAKER_00: My motto is why not me?
• 19:12
  SPEAKER_01: I love it.
• 19:12
  SPEAKER_01: I'm the same, like, why not me?
• 19:14
  SPEAKER_01: If she is doing it, if that person they're making, like, why not me?
• 19:17
  SPEAKER_01: Like, why not?
• 19:18
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and I am actually one of those people who is, I swear, is like less qualified to be doing something that I'm doing in the sense of like, I'm a yes and I figure it out, but I love to build.
• 19:29
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not lazy.
• 19:30
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I will roll my sleeves up and get it done.
• 19:32
  SPEAKER_00: But if an opportunity presents itself, I will figure out a way to make it happen.
• 19:37
  SPEAKER_00: And I do think that I don't have that fear-based mentality when it comes to entrepreneurship.
• 19:43
  SPEAKER_00: Because A, I've seen a lot less qualified people doing things and it's just about doing.
• 19:49
  SPEAKER_01: Do you think you were born with that?
• 19:50
  SPEAKER_01: Like, do you think that's something you and our people are born with with that why not me?
• 19:54
  SPEAKER_01: Because I feel like I've always been like a why not me.
• 19:56
  SPEAKER_01: If I see other people, I'm like, yeah, why not me?
• 19:58
  SPEAKER_01: I can figure it out.
• 19:58
  SPEAKER_01: Like believing that you're capable, believing that you can, if you don't have the qualifications, you can get the qualifications or Google it or trial and error, like figure it out.
• 20:07
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I interestingly enough, when it comes to business and entrepreneurship, I'm not afraid of rejection.
• 20:13
  SPEAKER_00: So it's huge.
• 20:14
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and I'm not afraid of what people think in a sense of um people are just people.
• 20:22
  SPEAKER_00: Everyone I meet has something that they are insecure about.
• 20:25
  SPEAKER_00: And so I'm not really worried about what they think of me.
• 20:28
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm a very like all press is good press.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_00: So I don't really care if anyone says anything about me.
• 20:33
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not doing anything to harm anybody.
• 20:34
  SPEAKER_00: So if I'm putting myself out there, like what people are gonna make fun of me for trying.
• 20:39
  SPEAKER_00: So what that story came in is I was first starting my business and I got invited to Forbes 30 under 30.
• 20:45
  SPEAKER_01: Wow.
• 20:45
  SPEAKER_00: And um, just to attend, I wasn't, I wasn't nominated.
• 20:49
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm walking around and there's so many people, it's like thousands of people.
• 20:53
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, how am I gonna?
• 20:55
  SPEAKER_00: I was just starting to get clients, right?
• 20:56
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, how am I gonna meet anybody?
• 20:58
  SPEAKER_00: So there was this kind of a marketplace there, and I was like, you know what?
• 21:04
  SPEAKER_00: It's the last day.
• 21:05
  SPEAKER_00: I get on the app, which is like an app for the event, and I post saying, I, you know, I have a law firm for startups, I'm hosting free consultations in this marketplace room.
• 21:15
  SPEAKER_00: And given, mind you, these booths were thousands of dollars.
• 21:19
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't have, so I pulled up a cocktail table, went to FedEx, made a makeshift sign, had somebody take pictures of me there, and I was like, free consultations.
• 21:28
  SPEAKER_00: And I got a few of my first clients that way.
• 21:31
  SPEAKER_00: And I did not care.
• 21:32
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 21:33
  SPEAKER_00: Why not make?
• 21:34
  SPEAKER_00: You know what I mean?
• 21:35
  SPEAKER_00: Like people needed it.
• 21:36
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, I meant, I wasn't gonna walk around and just not make connections.
• 21:39
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that's a big mistake people make.
• 21:41
  SPEAKER_00: At least make one connection wherever you go.
• 21:44
  SPEAKER_01: And I think they're unwilling to like either be rejected or to put themselves out there, but it's not to me like, oh, I put myself out there once.
• 21:51
  SPEAKER_01: It's like, no, you put yourself out there all the time, over and over and over again for days, we like you don't stop putting Like you just are always putting yourself out there.
• 22:02
  SPEAKER_01: It's like a muscle with the reps.
• 22:04
  SPEAKER_01: It's not like you just did it once.
• 22:05
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I I guarantee you probably did it.
• 22:07
  SPEAKER_01: You still do it.
• 22:08
  SPEAKER_00: Still do it.
• 22:09
  SPEAKER_00: I like even my press, for example.
• 22:11
  SPEAKER_00: I went to uh for how I got into Vogue business.
• 22:14
  SPEAKER_00: I knew they had an event, and I found out who the main writer was that I wanted to get in contact with, looked up all her pieces and pitched her right there on the spot and was like, I can write commentary for you on this exact topic that I know that you're writing about.
• 22:28
  SPEAKER_00: And she's like, Oh, well, we actually, it was the um Chanel and what goes around comes around case.
• 22:33
  SPEAKER_00: And she's like, Do you think you're gonna be at the hearing?
• 22:36
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, Yes, I'll be at the hearing.
• 22:37
  SPEAKER_00: So right when the hearing ended, I called her up and gave her immediate uh feedback on what happened on the case so that she was the first to write about it.
• 22:45
  SPEAKER_00: So it's not even just about showing up, but showing up strategically.
• 22:49
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 22:49
  SPEAKER_00: And I always call it the offer versus the ask.
• 22:53
  SPEAKER_00: If I would have just gone to Vogue business and said, hey, I really want to write for you, she'd be like, cool, it doesn't everybody.
• 22:59
  SPEAKER_00: But I looked at what she needed and I offered my time.
• 23:03
  SPEAKER_00: Time is our most valuable asset.
• 23:05
  SPEAKER_00: So even when you are networking, it's not just showing up, it's about leveraging the opportunities there and the time there to make it worth your time.
• 23:13
  SPEAKER_00: I love stories like this.
• 23:15
  SPEAKER_00: I love hearing this.
• 23:16
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, I am unhinged when it comes to my brand.
• 23:19
  SPEAKER_00: Like I will do what I need.
• 23:20
  SPEAKER_00: The things I had to do to get to where I am.
• 23:22
  SPEAKER_01: Like, did you I feel like if you haven't, you should take part in that trend was like unhinged things I've done to like become successful or like unhinged things and like tell us some of these stories?
• 23:31
  SPEAKER_01: I did.
• 23:31
  SPEAKER_00: That's I have that one.
• 23:33
  SPEAKER_00: I know.
• 23:33
  SPEAKER_00: I should have I should have pinned it.
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_00: It's it's funny with the things that I have done, but yeah, it's just kind of you know, putting yourself out there.
• 23:40
  SPEAKER_00: And what's the worst?
• 23:41
  SPEAKER_00: Someone's gonna say no.
• 23:45
  SPEAKER_01: When you've put yourself out there and you have gotten no's and rejections, have you ever taken it to mean something personal?
• 23:54
  SPEAKER_01: Not in business.
• 23:55
  SPEAKER_01: In dating, yes, but why do you think that is?
• 23:58
  SPEAKER_01: Why do you think you take it personal in dating and not business?
• 24:00
  SPEAKER_01: I think it's a vulnerability.
• 24:02
  SPEAKER_01: So oh, so like putting yourself out there like more emotionally versus yeah professionally.
• 24:07
  SPEAKER_01: It's a different thing for me.
• 24:09
  SPEAKER_00: I think um when it comes to my business, it's interesting.
• 24:14
  SPEAKER_00: I feel like I have more control over it.
• 24:16
  SPEAKER_00: And all of my clients feel the opposite.
• 24:18
  SPEAKER_00: They're like, in my business, I feel like I don't have control over something.
• 24:22
  SPEAKER_00: And that goes back to the issue of money.
• 24:25
  SPEAKER_00: Um, how do I generate revenue from my business or how do I make this a success?
• 24:30
  SPEAKER_00: Um, that I have no limiting beliefs because I'm also a service-based business.
• 24:34
  SPEAKER_00: So it's a little bit different than a product where you have a lot of capital up front.
• 24:39
  SPEAKER_00: But when it comes to emotional relationships, it's been interesting because I feel like you have to be vulnerable and open up sides of you that aren't something you're like, you're not selling up something someone necessarily needs, someone they what they want.
• 24:58
  SPEAKER_00: So um it's that's been something I'm really working on from a personal perspective.
• 25:03
  SPEAKER_00: How has dating been for you lately?
• 25:05
  SPEAKER_00: If you don't know how to do that, you know, I oh please, I'm an open book.
• 25:09
  SPEAKER_00: Um that might be the biggest problem, actually.
• 25:11
  SPEAKER_00: No, I'm kidding.
• 25:12
  SPEAKER_00: Um I I like it.
• 25:14
  SPEAKER_00: I think it's been interesting because I have um been thinking more about, you know, if I would have dated anybody in my past, I've developed so much.
• 25:27
  SPEAKER_00: And I heard this thing where someone was like, a lot of women are like, I am who I am, I know who I am at this point.
• 25:33
  SPEAKER_00: If you look at a picture from yourself maybe five years ago, you're like, I don't know that girl.
• 25:37
  SPEAKER_00: Or even last year, you're like, oh my God, I've grown so much.
• 25:40
  SPEAKER_00: So I think we're always growing, and I think I'm open to that now.
• 25:44
  SPEAKER_00: I want someone to grow with, and um, being vulnerable is something that I'm working on.
• 25:50
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but dating is fun.
• 25:51
  SPEAKER_00: I do think New York dating is a challenge, but again, I've done harder things, so it's it's exciting.
• 25:58
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm not sure if you've experienced this, but what I've heard from a lot of like single people, either I know or from clients, especially being a successful woman, have you ever dealt with how men respond to you being so successful, whether they feel insecure or whether they feel threatened, or are you always dating like above, you know, financially to ensure that doesn't happen?
• 26:20
  SPEAKER_01: Have you ever had like experiences like that?
• 26:22
  SPEAKER_00: So it's an interesting topic because I usually don't mind if a man isn't as successful as me per se.
• 26:30
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, they just have to have a really good relationship with themselves and with money.
• 26:35
  SPEAKER_00: And it sounds very odd because I've realized that when I haven't actually thought about that, men who have a bad relationship with money will find become competitive or they don't like the way that I operate as the Lux lawyer.
• 26:49
  SPEAKER_00: Um and I don't have really limiting beliefs around that.
• 26:51
  SPEAKER_00: So even if they have drive and if they have a good relationship with money, then it doesn't matter to me either way.
• 26:58
  SPEAKER_00: I have found that it's important in business or in relationships that if someone is competitive with you, even if you're collaborating, it's interesting because there's you can't always tell, um, but there's points when you can, and that's never a good thing.
• 27:16
  SPEAKER_00: So you want to kind of take a step back.
• 27:18
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but again, it's always a timing thing.
• 27:20
  SPEAKER_00: It's a song and dance on how to kind of like navigate that.
• 27:24
  SPEAKER_00: Even in friendships, it's hard too.
• 27:26
  SPEAKER_01: Ooh, I feel like there's there's a story or two there.
• 27:29
  SPEAKER_01: What do you feel like is hard for women to not compete with each other?
• 27:36
  SPEAKER_01: Like, what do you think?
• 27:37
  SPEAKER_01: Why is it that some women just seem to like there's a competition of who's more successful or online or who's more valid, whatever it is, versus women who aren't?
• 27:46
  SPEAKER_01: And why is it that you, and we can even go into like connected table from there, you seem to be able to facilitate such genuine connections.
• 27:53
  SPEAKER_01: How?
• 27:54
  SPEAKER_00: So that's actually honestly one of my biggest um like blessings in my life is that I haven't had or experienced a lot of competition with women.
• 28:04
  SPEAKER_00: I think also because I'm always rooting for people.
• 28:07
  SPEAKER_00: Like I straight up want women or anybody I'm with who I actually like to succeed.
• 28:13
  SPEAKER_00: And I will open up my doors and any of my contacts because I think that that is something I'm always trying to do.
• 28:20
  SPEAKER_00: I'm always trying to offer or bring people together.
• 28:23
  SPEAKER_00: And the true joy of my life is when I see two people that I've connected collaborate.
• 28:27
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, I love that.
• 28:28
  SPEAKER_00: And it has no benefit to me.
• 28:30
  SPEAKER_00: So I think that's how I was able to always develop really strong relationships.
• 28:34
  SPEAKER_00: I actually got it from um a seminar I was at with Diane von Fostenberg.
• 28:39
  SPEAKER_00: She was speaking about what she calls her magic wand.
• 28:44
  SPEAKER_00: And she said, when you are developing your personal brand or who you are as a person in society or among friends, it's really important for you to start doing things for other people.
• 28:58
  SPEAKER_00: And it has no benefit to you.
• 28:59
  SPEAKER_00: So that when those two people bring you up, it's always in a positive way.
• 29:04
  SPEAKER_00: So as you keep doing that, then you start having this what they call what she calls the magic wand, where she said, I've been doing this throughout my life all the time, that when I pick up the phone and I actually need something from somebody, they are willing to do that.
• 29:18
  SPEAKER_00: Or if I walk into a room, I know that there isn't, there aren't negative things being said about me because I've helped those people and haven't done anything to harm them.
• 29:26
  SPEAKER_00: So I've taken that advice and I'm really trying to do that.
• 29:29
  SPEAKER_00: So with the connected table, that's really what I try to do.
• 29:32
  SPEAKER_00: It's I think thoughtfully about how the people in that room can benefit one another.
• 29:37
  SPEAKER_00: And with the smaller groups, we even have a seating chart and we're really specific.
• 29:41
  SPEAKER_00: So I'll see some, I'll see someone who has a fund next to somebody I know who's fundraising, or somebody who has a nonprofit with another nonprofit.
• 29:51
  SPEAKER_00: And it's been honestly amazing to like see how the collaborations just organically take place and you know, to facilitate that is such a blessing.
• 30:00
  SPEAKER_01: I think this is so needed.
• 30:02
  SPEAKER_01: I just think that, I mean, women, I know you have some co-ed ones, need more space.
• 30:07
  SPEAKER_01: And like you said, there's not like a doing to get.
• 30:09
  SPEAKER_01: It's like a genuine, I want to help you in.
• 30:12
  SPEAKER_01: How can I support you?
• 30:13
  SPEAKER_01: Not like what can I take or what can I get from you, but actually approaching.
• 30:17
  SPEAKER_01: Like I speak a lot about that, even like online, even when like you're selling and showing up on social media, it's not like, what can I get from people online?
• 30:24
  SPEAKER_01: It's like, well, you know, show up and like be of service and help people.
• 30:27
  SPEAKER_01: And then in turn, they will always want to hire you or whatever it is.
• 30:31
  SPEAKER_01: But it's that pureness that you're coming from.
• 30:33
  SPEAKER_01: Like it and it's actual genuine.
• 30:34
  SPEAKER_01: You're not faking, like, I'm gonna pretend it's like, no, I actually want to help you and serve you.
• 30:39
  SPEAKER_01: Like, how can I support?
• 30:41
  SPEAKER_01: And then, like, there's this reciprocity effect.
• 30:43
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 30:43
  SPEAKER_00: And you know, people always ask me, they're like, is the connector table part of like level up or your business?
• 30:48
  SPEAKER_00: And my co-founder, Christina, has courses.
• 30:50
  SPEAKER_00: And so they're always like, What is this for?
• 30:52
  SPEAKER_00: And we genuinely don't have an ask.
• 30:55
  SPEAKER_00: And this is probably one of the first times in my life where I just don't really have an ask.
• 31:00
  SPEAKER_00: When people ask me, they're like, How can I support you?
• 31:02
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, I, you know what?
• 31:04
  SPEAKER_00: Just show up and be present.
• 31:05
  SPEAKER_00: And I think it'll, you know, pay its way forward in the future.
• 31:09
  SPEAKER_00: And it already has in so many different ways.
• 31:11
  SPEAKER_00: Like, even coming to this podcast with you, getting to connect that way.
• 31:15
  SPEAKER_00: And so we'll see.
• 31:16
  SPEAKER_00: Stay tuned.
• 31:17
  SPEAKER_00: But um, it's been really nice to do something without having an ask, actually.
• 31:22
  SPEAKER_01: Well, you can call me anytime if you want.
• 31:24
  SPEAKER_00: My magic wand is working.
• 31:28
  SPEAKER_01: When you had the idea for Connected Table, how did that come about?
• 31:31
  SPEAKER_01: Did you feel like there was a gap in terms of there wasn't a space where there wasn't an ask?
• 31:36
  SPEAKER_01: Because there have there are other founder clubs or supper clubs or dinner things like that.
• 31:42
  SPEAKER_01: But I feel like Connected Table is very different in terms of that.
• 31:46
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, because we're not selling anything and we're not promoting anything.
• 31:49
  SPEAKER_00: Even the brands we bring in, um, we're really selective because a lot of the attendees go to brand events or brand dinners and they feel obligated to post.
• 31:59
  SPEAKER_00: We don't ask anybody to post.
• 32:01
  SPEAKER_00: We have a professional photographer there, but there isn't actually a business or product or anything to promote generally.
• 32:07
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and so when we started it, Christina and I were in Cape Town and we had just moved to Miami.
• 32:14
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, there's so many incredible exited founders and smart women in Miami, but it's not like New York where we're all mingling and networking and going to events.
• 32:23
  SPEAKER_00: It was very siloed.
• 32:25
  SPEAKER_00: And, you know, you can ask people to grab coffee, but I mean, as somebody who gets asked all the time to get coffee, there's almost only so much caffeine I could drink and so much time I have.
• 32:36
  SPEAKER_00: So I was like, how can I meet incredible people who are very busy and successful, but also offer them something where they can also meet other people.
• 32:46
  SPEAKER_00: It's not just, you know, a one-off coffee where they, you know, they don't have that much time.
• 32:51
  SPEAKER_00: And so we did it to honestly develop friendships and we called it the connected table because I we feel like everyone is one degree apart.
• 33:00
  SPEAKER_00: We noticed that last night.
• 33:01
  SPEAKER_00: Everybody was like, I didn't know you knew this person.
• 33:03
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my God, I haven't seen you in forever.
• 33:05
  SPEAKER_00: And so even those people were like probably messaging each other, like, we should grab coffee sometime.
• 33:10
  SPEAKER_00: And now they got it done.
• 33:11
  SPEAKER_00: They got to meet, and then everyone's fresh in mind.
• 33:14
  SPEAKER_00: You meet new people, old friends, and it's just a great way to kind of re-up that with other incredible, successful people.
• 33:22
  SPEAKER_00: And one thing that we always get asked is, do I have to have a certain social following?
• 33:26
  SPEAKER_00: Do I have to be a founder?
• 33:28
  SPEAKER_00: And the answer is no.
• 33:29
  SPEAKER_00: We had the creative director of Ralph Loren there.
• 33:32
  SPEAKER_00: We had a founder who had wearables, um, the um earring wearables.
• 33:36
  SPEAKER_00: Those are so cool.
• 33:37
  SPEAKER_00: Kara's, I cannot watching patents.
• 33:40
  SPEAKER_00: I was like, you're a boss.
• 33:42
  SPEAKER_00: Um, we had you there.
• 33:44
  SPEAKER_00: We had, you know, some content creators, but really thoughtful in their space.
• 33:48
  SPEAKER_00: So it's a it's a big variety.
• 33:50
  SPEAKER_01: And I think also like human connection for women is so important.
• 33:53
  SPEAKER_01: Like sometimes we can get busy with like the online and the business and all that, but this is like a dedicated time to actually have like meaningful connections, to be present, to recharge in that kind of way that fills our cup because we are so like community and tribal based.
• 34:09
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 34:09
  SPEAKER_01: That you don't want to forget, like, it's so needed, even amongst like all the business and all the success things that we're doing.
• 34:15
  SPEAKER_00: I think so too.
• 34:16
  SPEAKER_00: I think also from like before it's a lot of internet friends and like people DMing each other.
• 34:20
  SPEAKER_00: It's so nice to meet in real life.
• 34:22
  SPEAKER_01: That's why I was like, I'm willing to fly.
• 34:23
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, I will fly anytime because it is different to in-person.
• 34:27
  SPEAKER_01: It's why I like to do in-person podcasts.
• 34:29
  SPEAKER_01: I feel it's very different than a Zoom call.
• 34:31
  SPEAKER_01: It it the energy, the aura is so different.
• 34:33
  SPEAKER_01: So I mean, I'm so glad you're doing it.
• 34:35
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, I'm so glad too.
• 34:37
  SPEAKER_01: Speaking of content, I want to dive into one more thing, which is I saw like a reel around IP and like you won this like five-figure case.
• 34:46
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, yes.
• 34:47
  SPEAKER_01: And I've seen people like stealing other people's like reels to use in that product line.
• 34:52
  SPEAKER_01: Like, can you go into kind of what people need to be aware of as a personal band, as a content creator, in terms of like their IP, their rights and their intellectual property, essentially in terms of people using their content without paying for it?
• 35:06
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, this has been a really big part of our business.
• 35:09
  SPEAKER_00: Um, we win it a lot of times it's hard because I win cases that are so incredible through settlement.
• 35:17
  SPEAKER_00: And because we all sign a settlement agreement, I never get to spill the tea on actually like who I'm working with.
• 35:23
  SPEAKER_00: Um, because even just this week I settled to deal with one of the top luxury brands in the market, like top top.
• 35:32
  SPEAKER_00: And we signed a settlement, couldn't talk about it, but it's been interesting how people have or creators have had their um their content utilized and it goes into the contract itself.
• 35:44
  SPEAKER_00: There's also now with usage rights or people promoting things on billboards or different ways, you have a right to your own image.
• 35:54
  SPEAKER_00: And even if you didn't file a copyright for it, because I mean, no one is going and taking their content and filing a copyright for it.
• 36:01
  SPEAKER_00: Um, it is if it's used outside of what you agreed to, you do definitely have a claim.
• 36:07
  SPEAKER_00: So in it, I wouldn't say filing a lawsuit is the best way, but definitely writing a letter and settling it out is a good cost-effective way to get some compensation for that happening.
• 36:19
  SPEAKER_00: And ever since I did that post, I've had a lot of different people reach out to me and we've been successfully navigating that, um, which has been interesting.
• 36:29
  SPEAKER_00: And I do think with the agency as well, how we're just disrupting this entire industry of the agency model.
• 36:35
  SPEAKER_00: So I work with creators.
• 36:38
  SPEAKER_00: Um, for example, I have a creator who had a$50,000 deal with a beauty brand.
• 36:43
  SPEAKER_00: And she's like, Can you help me negotiate this?
• 36:46
  SPEAKER_00: And can you do it on your hourly rate through your law firm?
• 36:50
  SPEAKER_00: Had she worked with an agent, because she's not represented, that take that had taken 20%, they would have charged her$10,000 to send maybe three emails back and forth, finalizing that and having an attorney review the contract, which is I could do internally, it cost her maybe$1,200 instead of$10,000.
• 37:10
  SPEAKER_00: So looking at that model, it's just dated.
• 37:13
  SPEAKER_00: And that's why I think a lot of creators don't want to work with agents because it's too much money out the door for like a couple emails, then they source the deal themselves.
• 37:21
  SPEAKER_01: I remember that that reminded me of back in the day when I was like a more of a wellness influencer and doing brand deals.
• 37:27
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 37:27
  SPEAKER_01: When I found out how much they were taking, I was like, For what?
• 37:32
  SPEAKER_01: I was shocked.
• 37:33
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, the brand paid whatever, and they you took, I was my jaw was on the floor.
• 37:39
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, oh, I could not believe, yeah, not believe it.
• 37:42
  SPEAKER_00: And so for if we source a deal, we do a 20% agency fee through our agency, but only if we source it, because actually that was the work and they didn't have that before.
• 37:50
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 37:50
  SPEAKER_00: But if for someone to take a huge percentage of things that something that came to you directly, it's like, come on.
• 37:56
  SPEAKER_00: So that's something that you know definitely needs to change in the agency world.
• 38:01
  SPEAKER_00: And then we also work with e-commerce brands.
• 38:03
  SPEAKER_00: So I also have a lot of opportunities that come through that.
• 38:06
  SPEAKER_00: But yeah, I think creators are getting super smart and they want to stop if they want to stop how their image is being used incorrectly.
• 38:15
  SPEAKER_00: They want to make sure their contracts are tight.
• 38:16
  SPEAKER_00: It's a billion-dollar business.
• 38:18
  SPEAKER_01: And yeah, I think you also need to be aware of what's in the contract and like what they can use and what they can't.
• 38:23
  SPEAKER_01: You can't just sign contracts without reading them and without understanding them.
• 38:27
  SPEAKER_01: Like if you don't understand, you need to be able to understand them.
• 38:30
  SPEAKER_01: I remember there was a time where I was, I was just like, sign away.
• 38:33
  SPEAKER_01: I had no clue what I was signing for.
• 38:34
  SPEAKER_01: No, you I didn't know what usage was.
• 38:36
  SPEAKER_01: And it, I think it's important and it's smart.
• 38:38
  SPEAKER_01: And I mean, I talk about nervous system.
• 38:39
  SPEAKER_01: It's good for your nervous system to know your rights and to know what they can and cannot do and to be legally protected.
• 38:45
  SPEAKER_01: Completely.
• 38:46
  SPEAKER_00: But I also think there's a fine line because there's a ton of creators out there.
• 38:50
  SPEAKER_00: Never let a lawyer ruin the deal for you.
• 38:53
  SPEAKER_00: I always say that.
• 38:54
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, look, sometimes if I I do something like a behind the scenes where I say, look, if they're a sensitive client and they don't like lawyers, I can help you behind the scenes, but you should respond.
• 39:04
  SPEAKER_00: If it's something where it's you need me to negotiate for you, happy to do that.
• 39:09
  SPEAKER_00: So lawyers can kill deals.
• 39:11
  SPEAKER_00: That's a very common thing.
• 39:12
  SPEAKER_00: Lawyers kill kill deals all the time by being too aggressive.
• 39:17
  SPEAKER_00: And I've seen that where the creator really wants the deal.
• 39:21
  SPEAKER_00: But if the attorney is arguing over something super small and in like not that relevant, the agency or the brand is like, honestly, I'll go to the next creator.
• 39:30
  SPEAKER_00: This is not worth my time.
• 39:31
  SPEAKER_00: So at the end of the day, everyone wants to make money.
• 39:34
  SPEAKER_00: So, you know, just making sure that there's a good balance between that is important too.
• 39:38
  SPEAKER_01: I think this is also where your superpower comes in in terms of how you are.
• 39:41
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe someone else would be like really aggressive, but like your ability to like read the room and flow.
• 39:46
  SPEAKER_00: Like Yeah.
• 39:47
  SPEAKER_00: I'd rather not overly redline just so my client feels like I'm doing something.
• 39:51
  SPEAKER_00: I'd rather just say, like, this is what you need to know.
• 39:53
  SPEAKER_00: Don't over-red line because you're going to lose this deal.
• 39:56
  SPEAKER_00: Or it's like L'Oreal or Revlon are these clients that are huge.
• 40:00
  SPEAKER_00: Like, if you want to develop a relationship with them, don't be difficult.
• 40:04
  SPEAKER_00: Definitely like tell them what your points are, get it across, be quick about it.
• 40:09
  SPEAKER_00: There's a lot of other people they would want to work with.
• 40:12
  SPEAKER_00: So um, doing that song and dance is really important, especially in the world of content.
• 40:18
  SPEAKER_01: What do you think?
• 40:19
  SPEAKER_01: Or are there any other like gaps or things you see that people need to be aware of when it comes to legally and like creating content online and having a personal brand?
• 40:28
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I do think that it's great to have quality content like what you're what you're doing here with the podcast.
• 40:34
  SPEAKER_00: And I think also being thoughtful in that if you are just pushing brand deals, there isn't longevity in that, especially with AI.
• 40:45
  SPEAKER_00: Have you seen these AI creators?
• 40:47
  SPEAKER_00: My God, they're actually very good.
• 40:50
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I know what the ones you mean.
• 40:51
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, you have to have an engaged audience and you have to actually be talking about something of relevance for the world of content creation.
• 40:59
  SPEAKER_00: If you don't have an engaged audience, it really doesn't matter.
• 41:01
  SPEAKER_00: People are buying followers, there's AI bots, there's just gonna be so much change.
• 41:06
  SPEAKER_00: And if you're boring, a brand can just use AI instead of you.
• 41:10
  SPEAKER_00: So that's what I would say.
• 41:12
  SPEAKER_00: I would say just really engage with your audience, provide value, and communicate.
• 41:18
  SPEAKER_00: Don't be afraid.
• 41:19
  SPEAKER_00: I think going live is like one of the things that people don't do enough.
• 41:23
  SPEAKER_00: I went live this morning.
• 41:24
  SPEAKER_00: You I saw that actually.
• 41:25
  SPEAKER_00: I got the notification.
• 41:26
  SPEAKER_00: I love going live.
• 41:27
  SPEAKER_00: I love going live too.
• 41:29
  SPEAKER_00: I know I do it on my law firm page sometimes where I do a live QA, but I have to, I mean, I guess both my sides, my personal life and my legal life, I actually don't keep them separate.
• 41:39
  SPEAKER_00: Like I'm public, so people can see everything I do all the time.
• 41:42
  SPEAKER_00: My clients all follow me.
• 41:43
  SPEAKER_00: I'm never gonna have that, you know, that separation because I am who I am.
• 41:48
  SPEAKER_00: But when I go live on my personal, I'm like, I don't know if I should go.
• 41:51
  SPEAKER_00: Like I'm doing weird things at home.
• 41:53
  SPEAKER_00: I'm in my big t-shirt and like top bunning, but it is what it is.
• 41:58
  SPEAKER_01: But I also think like you're such a badass in terms of it, it still carries through, right?
• 42:03
  SPEAKER_01: There's different facets of you that come out at different times.
• 42:05
  SPEAKER_01: You can go live like this or like showing up in your badass lawyer.
• 42:09
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, I would definitely go live like this, but you know, uh, it's different parts of it.
• 42:14
  SPEAKER_00: And I think it all goes back to like trust.
• 42:17
  SPEAKER_00: So um, a big part when people think of me as a luxe lawyer, that's definitely part of who I am.
• 42:24
  SPEAKER_00: But I do think that, and I've been seeing content around this about how how you dress and how you present yourself does really matter.
• 42:32
  SPEAKER_00: It does.
• 42:32
  SPEAKER_00: And I think it's kind of a touchy subject, but I've always believed that because it's almost like being in shape, caring about your body, caring about the outer does make a difference because it creates a level of trust with you that if you can take care of yourself, you could take care of me.
• 42:49
  SPEAKER_00: So I don't think there's anything wrong with that.
• 42:51
  SPEAKER_01: No, it's completely like it's psychological.
• 42:54
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, well, nervous system-wise, right?
• 42:56
  SPEAKER_01: Your mirror neurons are like co-regulating because it says, like, oh, this person's put together, this person respects themselves, you know, they eat healthy, they work out, they take good care of their body.
• 43:06
  SPEAKER_01: I can then trust them.
• 43:07
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 43:07
  SPEAKER_01: Like it actually signals like subconsciously to the system.
• 43:10
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 43:11
  SPEAKER_00: And I even find when I am being my bag lady and running around all frazzled, like, I don't think I deliver as well.
• 43:17
  SPEAKER_00: So that's also one of the reasons I'm like, I want to have a small bag because it means I'm calm, cool, and collected.
• 43:22
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not running around being crazy.
• 43:24
  SPEAKER_00: That is still a version of success I'm striving for as I walk in with my big bag and my tripod, but we're getting there.
• 43:31
  SPEAKER_01: I feel like I don't know if you like the show suits, but you remind me a lot of suits.
• 43:35
  SPEAKER_01: I feel like you'd be like, Rachel, like, I feel like I would love to see you in a courtroom just kick ass.
• 43:39
  SPEAKER_01: Cause I feel like you you might feel like you're carrying on this big bag, but you have such this like beautiful, grounded power presence that's not soft in a timid way, but it's not aggressive and hard.
• 43:51
  SPEAKER_01: It's just present.
• 43:53
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, thank you.
• 43:54
  SPEAKER_00: I haven't seen suits all the way.
• 43:56
  SPEAKER_00: I know.
• 43:58
  SPEAKER_00: You give you give, yeah.
• 44:00
  SPEAKER_01: I'm actually looking for a new show so that might be a good idea.
• 44:02
  SPEAKER_01: It's on Netflix.
• 44:03
  SPEAKER_01: I know.
• 44:03
  SPEAKER_01: At least Canadian Netflix.
• 44:04
  SPEAKER_01: I'm assuming US Netflix as well.
• 44:06
  SPEAKER_01: Probably.
• 44:06
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 44:07
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 44:08
  SPEAKER_01: That can be like your even your new bin show or to have on if you ever the new bin show.
• 44:12
  SPEAKER_00: I w it's funny, people are like, do you ever stay at home?
• 44:15
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, I'm always home and I watch so much TV because I always I mean, this is one of my big habits, is that I kind of work all I'm always at places running around during the day.
• 44:26
  SPEAKER_00: And so my team really handles everything from like the nine to five.
• 44:31
  SPEAKER_00: And from the five to nine is actually when I like do a lot of like a little later than nine, I'm not gonna lie.
• 44:37
  SPEAKER_00: Um, do a lot of my head down work.
• 44:39
  SPEAKER_00: So like a lot of my day is meeting people, calls, running around the city.
• 44:43
  SPEAKER_00: And that's actually how I made most of my clients is showing up.
• 44:46
  SPEAKER_00: Like, how many times do you meet like a cool lawyer or a cool accountant?
• 44:50
  SPEAKER_00: Everybody needs us.
• 44:51
  SPEAKER_00: And I tell my friend who's an accountant, I was like, just say yes and show up and watch how your business grows.
• 44:56
  SPEAKER_00: And he's like, honestly, it's true.
• 44:57
  SPEAKER_00: I'm usually the only accountant in the room, and right there, everybody wants to work with me.
• 45:01
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, exactly.
• 45:02
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm doing a lot of that in the day, and then at night is a lot of my head down.
• 45:06
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm watching uh around like seven or eight o'clock, I allow myself to like work with the TV on.
• 45:11
  SPEAKER_00: And so I'm I'm big on my shows.
• 45:13
  SPEAKER_01: How do you maintain balance?
• 45:15
  SPEAKER_01: Because if you're running around all these places, you know, you've got three different companies roughly that you're running, you've got equity and other ones.
• 45:24
  SPEAKER_01: How are you doing it all?
• 45:25
  SPEAKER_01: So a variety is the spice of life.
• 45:28
  SPEAKER_01: I have a lot of variety by day.
• 45:30
  SPEAKER_01: I was saying this to someone else.
• 45:32
  SPEAKER_01: I actually think variety can be more energizing and fulfilling than doing less.
• 45:37
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, absolutely.
• 45:38
  SPEAKER_01: Or having like one thing that's like I'm like you, like more variety, more companies, more things.
• 45:42
  SPEAKER_01: Goodbye.
• 45:43
  SPEAKER_00: But keep going.
• 45:43
  SPEAKER_00: I I don't know if it's like the like me holding on with to Gen Z with like a thread, because I feel like all of Gen Z does a million things at once, and I'm one of those two.
• 45:51
  SPEAKER_00: I've always kind of been like that.
• 45:53
  SPEAKER_00: But I love variety.
• 45:54
  SPEAKER_00: Like I think that if I was, I think that's why I ended up quitting.
• 45:59
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't want to be stuck behind a desk all day.
• 46:01
  SPEAKER_00: So every day is a little different.
• 46:03
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but everything I do in a sense is some sort of work.
• 46:07
  SPEAKER_00: Even when I go out on a night out, I always meet clients.
• 46:11
  SPEAKER_00: I always meet people because I don't separate my personal life from my, from my um career.
• 46:16
  SPEAKER_00: I don't like have these two separate personas.
• 46:19
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and so it's always fun for me.
• 46:22
  SPEAKER_00: But balance, um, it's kind of that's a dirty word, not networking.
• 46:26
  SPEAKER_00: I think that my morning routine is uh really important.
• 46:30
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, I try to work out like three to four days a week.
• 46:34
  SPEAKER_00: And again, I do things that are fun.
• 46:36
  SPEAKER_00: Like this to me is so fun um to be able to chat and you know, you be on podcasts.
• 46:42
  SPEAKER_00: Like how many lawyers get to do that?
• 46:43
  SPEAKER_00: So I don't think a lot of it is work.
• 46:46
  SPEAKER_00: And I have a really great support system with my teams.
• 46:49
  SPEAKER_00: Um, they really hold it down for me.
• 46:51
  SPEAKER_00: And I also love everyone I work with, so it's been it's been good.
• 46:55
  SPEAKER_00: But honestly, my chillest days are Saturdays and Sundays.
• 46:58
  SPEAKER_00: I love to be home on the weekends.
• 47:00
  SPEAKER_00: I love to just relax.
• 47:02
  SPEAKER_00: I always have like hours or time periods that I'm vegging.
• 47:06
  SPEAKER_00: I don't take a day off though.
• 47:09
  SPEAKER_00: I don't think I've taken a full day off in eight years.
• 47:12
  SPEAKER_01: I can't say that I have I can't say I don't feel yeah.
• 47:16
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know the last day that I didn't, but not from like like we were saying, and I want to bring it back to when you love what you do, it's like you have an idea and then you just do this thing.
• 47:24
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 47:24
  SPEAKER_01: Because you just you love it.
• 47:26
  SPEAKER_01: And I think also when you love what you do, it doesn't feel like, oh, I have to do this thing because you're excited to do it.
• 47:33
  SPEAKER_01: Exactly.
• 47:34
  SPEAKER_01: It has a different energy.
• 47:34
  SPEAKER_01: It's not like, oh, I have to do this, but I'd rather be doing this.
• 47:37
  SPEAKER_01: It's like, no, I want to do this.
• 47:39
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that's exactly it.
• 47:40
  SPEAKER_00: It is just totally about, like, for example, when people are like, oh, like even when I was in St.
• 47:46
  SPEAKER_00: Bart's for New Year's, like I woke up at eight and it was so fun.
• 47:49
  SPEAKER_00: Woke up at eight and like everyone was still sleeping.
• 47:51
  SPEAKER_00: So I was like, let me just answer a couple emails from eight to ten.
• 47:54
  SPEAKER_00: And um, yes, I was on vacation, but like, how fortunate am I that I can, like my career allowed me to have the opportunity to go on a trip like that?
• 48:04
  SPEAKER_00: Answering a couple emails is enjoyable for me to like make sure I'm on top of it.
• 48:07
  SPEAKER_00: I can enjoy the rest of my day.
• 48:09
  SPEAKER_00: I don't feel the the stress, the pressure to do it.
• 48:12
  SPEAKER_00: I actually enjoy doing that.
• 48:13
  SPEAKER_00: So it's like, you know what, fine.
• 48:15
  SPEAKER_00: But if you're opening your laptop, like, oh, you know, it's so stressful.
• 48:19
  SPEAKER_00: And yes, I I don't have a boss, but my clients are my boss.
• 48:22
  SPEAKER_00: Like they do breathe down my throat and make new things that right away.
• 48:27
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but I do think that as long as I enjoy doing it, it's fine.
• 48:31
  SPEAKER_01: How do you have boundaries when people are breathing like down your neck?
• 48:36
  SPEAKER_00: That's also another dirty word for me.
• 48:37
  SPEAKER_00: Boundaries is something that I am working on.
• 48:42
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but I do work when I want to in a sense.
• 48:47
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm working every day, but if someone needs something right away, I do perform and I have to give it to them.
• 48:52
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but I when I find myself getting stressed, I do a lot of deep breathing.
• 48:56
  SPEAKER_00: And I also tell myself all the time, I don't cure cancer.
• 49:00
  SPEAKER_00: So it's not like I have anything that's that vital, it's not that vital for it to cause me to be frazzled or emotional or stressed.
• 49:08
  SPEAKER_00: So I try to kind of take it from a calm sense.
• 49:11
  SPEAKER_00: Um, yeah, I'm not cancer.
• 49:13
  SPEAKER_01: So I mean, I I've said the same thing to people, to my fiance, and like, you're not doing brain surgery, like no one's dying.
• 49:18
  SPEAKER_01: Like, no one's dying.
• 49:19
  SPEAKER_01: Like, and if they were, like, you wouldn't be the one to help them.
• 49:22
  SPEAKER_01: They need to go to the emergency room.
• 49:23
  SPEAKER_01: So, like, yeah, they can wait.
• 49:24
  SPEAKER_01: And but it's I can imagine how often, and I'm sure some things are urgent, but I'm sure there's also times where people are projecting their urgency or their timeline onto you, yeah, and just managing expectations or managing like whether it's realistic timelines or just is it actually urgent, or is it urgent for them?
• 49:43
  SPEAKER_01: And so they're like having a whole way with it.
• 49:45
  SPEAKER_00: Completely.
• 49:46
  SPEAKER_00: And I think the word boundaries is similar to like the masculine-feminine thing that people are having.
• 49:52
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I feel like people use boundaries sometimes as an excuse to not do something they don't want to do.
• 50:00
  SPEAKER_00: And that I think is a bad use of it when like somebody is um saying, you know, oh, I don't like I can't, I can't do this right now.
• 50:08
  SPEAKER_00: It's a boundary, and then everyone has to step back.
• 50:11
  SPEAKER_00: But I'm like, actually, it's more just you don't want to do something.
• 50:14
  SPEAKER_00: So you're using the term boundary.
• 50:16
  SPEAKER_00: I think in order to be successful, it's you have to do things that make you uncomfortable sometimes.
• 50:21
  SPEAKER_00: So having too many boundaries, I think, is limiting, but having personal boundaries is important.
• 50:27
  SPEAKER_00: So there is a song and dance with that too.
• 50:29
  SPEAKER_00: I actually just heard um, I think I'm Sith Hater on a podcast and she Oh, I love her.
• 50:33
  SPEAKER_00: She's been on here.
• 50:34
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, she has amazing.
• 50:35
  SPEAKER_00: So she was talking about like three things that you know, when she says yes to about how to say yes.
• 50:41
  SPEAKER_00: And I think the third one was that even if she doesn't want to do it, but it fills somebody else's cup or like it would be beneficial to her friends or family, she'll go out of her way to do that.
• 50:52
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that was a good explanation of how boundaries um are properly used.
• 50:58
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes you gotta do stuff you don't want to do.
• 51:00
  SPEAKER_00: And even with work, like if I had if I was like telling my client, like, hey, boundary, when they were like, hey, I need this urgently and I know how important it is to them, and I do have the time to open my laps up and do it, and I can be responsive, I'm gonna do it.
• 51:14
  SPEAKER_01: No, 100%.
• 51:15
  SPEAKER_01: I can see where people are utilizing, you know, boundaries in not a way that's actually helping them, but almost like taking it out of context, like, oh, boundary, then like you said, everyone like backs off, or even with like nervous system regulation, they're like, no, that's gonna dysregulate my nervous system.
• 51:31
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, well, no, we need to expand it.
• 51:32
  SPEAKER_01: So like we need to do things that are uncomfortable versus using that as an excuse of why they can't do something.
• 51:38
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 51:38
  SPEAKER_00: I do think um nervous system regulation is very important in terms of especially with work, because again, a lot of your worth is tied to that.
• 51:48
  SPEAKER_00: So my big thing, um, I find a lot of my worth in like accolades and doing.
• 51:55
  SPEAKER_00: So the busier I am, the more accomplished I'm feeling.
• 51:58
  SPEAKER_00: So one of my big lessons is to, you know, sit back a little bit and not do the heavy checklist.
• 52:04
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, I'm a Virgo rising, so like I love a checklist and like crossing.
• 52:07
  SPEAKER_00: I love that you're a Virgo.
• 52:08
  SPEAKER_00: I love a Virgo.
• 52:09
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my God.
• 52:09
  SPEAKER_00: I'm a I'm a Leo, I'm a big Leo.
• 52:11
  SPEAKER_00: I have a five placement Leo, Aries Moon, which is like my downfall in life, and Virgo rising.
• 52:17
  SPEAKER_00: So no water.
• 52:19
  SPEAKER_01: I could see that though.
• 52:20
  SPEAKER_01: That I feel like from what I've seen about you, that track.
• 52:22
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, thank you.
• 52:23
  SPEAKER_01: So I have one final question.
• 52:25
  SPEAKER_01: Apart from having a small bag, what would it mean to you, or what does it mean to live beyond limits?
• 52:33
  SPEAKER_00: So living beyond limits would be to, you know, I always tell myself this is that when I feel doubt in myself or anything I'm doing, and I have those days too, I think back to my past.
• 52:50
  SPEAKER_00: I'm a big journaler, and I say, what if a lot of the things that I thought were to happen, it turned out even better than I could have expected.
• 52:58
  SPEAKER_00: So for me, living beyond limits is when there is something that feels out of my reach or that I'm not good enough, or I have these doubts about things, is that what if it's gonna be even better than I could have even imagined?
• 53:12
  SPEAKER_00: And time is gonna heal it all.
• 53:14
  SPEAKER_00: So as long as I give it time and I let things unfold the way they do, it could be even better.
• 53:19
  SPEAKER_00: My career's not better than I thought it could be.
• 53:21
  SPEAKER_00: So here we are.
• 53:22
  SPEAKER_01: I love that.
• 53:22
  SPEAKER_01: I like to say better than expected, more than I prayed for.
• 53:26
  SPEAKER_00: That's the succinct way to say what I've been trying to say.
• 53:30
  SPEAKER_00: Better than expected, more than I prayed for.
• 53:32
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 53:32
  SPEAKER_00: I like I say that all the time.
• 53:34
  SPEAKER_00: I'm that on threads.
• 53:35
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know if we do if we tweet or act anymore, but I thread it.
• 53:38
  SPEAKER_00: So yeah.
• 53:38
  SPEAKER_01: No, like, and it's such a it's a powerful context also to like just have over your life.
• 53:43
  SPEAKER_00: Ah, I mean for love, for career, for all the things.
• 53:47
  SPEAKER_00: I might need to quote you on this today.
• 53:49
  SPEAKER_00: That might be my my substack title, like better than expected, more than I prayed for.
• 53:53
  SPEAKER_00: Is that what it is?
• 53:53
  SPEAKER_00: There you go.
• 53:55
  SPEAKER_01: Well, thank you for coming on.
• 53:56
  SPEAKER_01: This has been absolutely amazing.
• 53:57
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you so much for having me.
• 53:59
  SPEAKER_01: Loving getting to know you and all that you are.
• 54:02
  SPEAKER_01: And thank you for you for not only putting together amazing spaces like the connected table, but for really allowing all of your brilliance to shine.
• 54:10
  SPEAKER_01: I think it's so important for women to be all who they are and to allow their bigness to shine and to allow themselves to be that big and be that light.
• 54:17
  SPEAKER_01: And they want to have three different companies, five, 10, 12, they want to go out and do the thing.
• 54:21
  SPEAKER_01: I think you're just such a role model, such a living example of that.
• 54:24
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you.
• 54:25
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you for you.
• 54:25
  SPEAKER_00: Ah, thank you for having me.
• 54:27
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you for you for having this podcast, this platform for people to speak.
• 54:30
  SPEAKER_00: That's great.
• 54:31
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you guys so much for watching.
• 54:33
  SPEAKER_01: If you haven't yet subscribed, make sure to do so down below and leave a rating and review for the podcast.
• 54:38
  SPEAKER_01: And I will see you in the next episode.
• 54:40
  SPEAKER_01: Bye.