Latest / The Bechdel Cast / New Year's Eve

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New Year's Eve · The Bechdel Cast

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: On the Bell Cast, the questions asked if movies have
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: women in them, Are all their discussions just boyfriends and husbands,
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: or do they have in individualism the patriarchy? Zef invest
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: start changing it with the beck Del cast. Oh man, yeah,
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: let's find it. Let's find a good line. There's so
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: many good lines. Wait, what about the one that Abigail
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: Breslin says to Sarah Jessica Parker when she's like, you're
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: just so moody and like possessive because you don't have
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: a man and you're me the man in your life.
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: I like the one where you're just so want to
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: be a hipster who had is a heartbroken by the prompt?
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: Oh wait, no, I know what My favorite line in
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: my line, favorite line, and the exchange in the movie
• 0:42
  Speaker 1: is okay, hopefully you remember the line store of talking
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: about um So Caitlin, you're like a comic book artist?
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: Do you like draw illustrate? Oh my god, I'm that
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: was so aggressive. Welcome to the Bechel Cast. Well wait, wait, wait,
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: which one was yours? Oh? My favorite line from the
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: film The Prestige film from two thousand eleven, directed by
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: Gary Marshall, New Year's Eve. My favorite line is let
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: the best the JJ win And then everyone was like
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: ha ha ha oh this what a what a happy
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: almost new year everyone. Uh, this is the Bexel Cast.
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: I'm Jamie Loftus, I'm Caitlin Darante, and this is our
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: podcast about how movies fair when we look at them
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: through an intersectional feminist lens, and folks, We're gonna have
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: fun this week. I feel like we, uh, as as
• 1:48
  Speaker 1: as an extended podcast family, have earned it. You know,
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: it's been the biggest ship pile of a year on record,
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: and it was that was a pretty competitive mark truly,
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: So there's been some pretty shitty years in the history
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: of the world. But you know what people were having
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: a lot of optimism for was two thousand and twelve.
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: Apparently there they made a whole movie about how excited
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: we were for two thousand and twelve. Yeah, why wouldn't
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: this movie have come out in like the end of nine,
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: when like we were actually talking about like this new millennium.
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: Why two k was a big thing? There was like
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: so much maybe like two thousand, two thousand twelve was
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: the year that some people thought the world would end
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: because of the like oh, I forgot about the mine
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: calendar thing. My theory was it was the entire movie
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: was funded by Obama's re election campaign. They're just like right,
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: I think they would have made a far better movie
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: if that were true. I don't know. That's up for
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: debate there. Uh, this movie has got off. Okay, so
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: we're this is the Bechtel cast um. If this is
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: your first episode, you know, maybe reconsiderate or or just
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: hang out and see it's we're loose. We're loose today.
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: But we're going to use the Bechtel test, I guess
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: theoretically as a jumping off point for discussion, that being
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: a media metric test invented by queer cartoonist Alison Bechdel,
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: sometimes called the Bechtel Wallace test. There requires that, for
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: our purposes, two people of a marginalized gender with names
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: talk to each other about something other than a man
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: for more than two lines of dialogue. Doesn't seem like
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: it would be that hard. This movie really takes a
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: long time to get there, really long. It does get there,
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: and so it does, but it barely does anything. There's
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: a whole scene in this movie where Sophia Vergara and
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: Katherine Aigel, are just throwing eggs across a room. A
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: feminist feminis n eggs symbolism. Okay, think about it. It's
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: who we're talking about New Year's Eve, the movie that
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: was supposed to get us all excited for two thousand
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: and twelve. Do you do you have a history with
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: this movie? Have you seen it before? I know I
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: hadn't seen this before. Okay, I know I had seen
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: the previous uh person cast Gary Marshall movie. I have
• 4:31
  Speaker 1: seen Valentine's Day. Valentine's Day, sure, Okay, I have not
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: seen that one either, Nor have I seen Mother's Day,
• 4:37
  Speaker 1: which came out five years after this one, which is
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: the like it's like an unofficial trilogy, because they're all
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: Gary Marshall ensemble movies that are all bad. There's no
• 4:49
  Speaker 1: way we were just talking about this off, Mike. There's
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: no way Gary Marshall actually directed this entire movie. I
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: feel like he hired ten assistant directors and paid them
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: enough to not credit them appropriately, and then showed up
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: for one. The true story of this movie for me
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: is in the forty five minute blooper reel at the end. Uh,
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: It's is pretty It's the most compelling part of the movie.
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: I think Jessica Bielle gives a birth to two copies
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: of Valentine Stand DVD in the blue on Blu ray Hello,
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: because she's rich, which is which is why like her
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: whole storyline makes no sense. Oh my gosh, no, now
• 5:32
  Speaker 1: these storylines makes sense. I can't wait. This is like
• 5:35
  Speaker 1: if uh, and we we you know, early in the
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: cast we covered four years ago. At this point we
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: covered Love Actually, And this is if I Love Actually,
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: Like I don't even know, Like, if Love Actually got
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: hit in the head really hard with the basketball, uh,
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: the movie would maybe be something like this. It's trying
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: to do the same vignette thing, but yes, instead of
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: like would love Actually the vignettes makes sense, they're just
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: generally pretty sexist and racist and dated. For this, these
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: don't even make sense. That don't make sense at least,
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: I mean, go back and listen to our Love Actually episode.
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: We had plenty to say about it and like, it's
• 6:19
  Speaker 1: very problematic in many ways, were not. At least Love Actually, though,
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: has the ability to elicit like real emotion in audiences,
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: Like people responded to that movie for a reason. I
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: understand why people really liked it, like in a dated way,
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: but like you're like, Okay, I I see, I see
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: why people were into this at the time. No one
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: was into this at the time. I think we're the
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: first people that have watched it since it came out.
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: It made Okay, it made a hundred and forty two
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: million dollars at the box office. It was one I
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: can't what else came out around that time that no
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: one everyone had to go see New Year's Eve. Because
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: that's actually a good question. My favorite fun fact about
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: this movie is then it was nominated for five Razzie
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: Awards and lost all of them to Jack and Jill
• 7:14
  Speaker 1: uh Adam Sandler. Yes, um, so you know it wasn't
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: even the worst movie to come out in that year. Um.
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: It also has a seven percent on Rotten Tomatoes. And
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: if you just like, if you look at the critical
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: reception chunk on Wikipedia about this movie, it's very funny
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: because like the quotes that get pulled about this movie
• 7:41
  Speaker 1: are and like there's I mean, I'm just gonna read
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: a couple. Okay. Roger Ebert, our favorite person, actually has
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: something that we would agree with, says New Year's Eve
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: is a dreary plod through the stands of time until
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: finally the last grain has trickled through the glass of
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: cinematic sludge. Shout up to sludge. How how is it
• 8:04
  Speaker 1: possible to assemble more than two dozen stars in a
• 8:07
  Speaker 1: movie and find nothing interesting for any of them to do?
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: End quote Um Claudia Winkleman, not Claudia of BBC one.
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: I have found the worst film of all time and
• 8:20
  Speaker 1: it is called New Year's Eve period And then there's
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: a couple more, but you get the idea. This is
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: I mean, this is This is one of those things
• 8:29
  Speaker 1: that it reminds me of the Lindsay Ellis did a
• 8:32
  Speaker 1: video on Cats and like the sorts of movies that
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: critics come together to just really take a gigantic dump
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: on as as a as a professional exercise. However, this
• 8:44
  Speaker 1: movie does deserve it. It's way more than Cats did
• 8:47
  Speaker 1: because Cats was good. Uh, this movie is is really bad. Um.
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: Oh another There's just so many This movie is just
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: a list of moments. There's also scenes that seem like
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: they're interrupted by another scene and then the previous scene
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: just starts against Yes, I have I made a note
• 9:04
  Speaker 1: of a few of those. They keep cutting too A
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: montage that they just they should just let the montage
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: play out, but Zecca Fron is taking Michelle Peiffer around
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: New York City ever heard of it to like check
• 9:17
  Speaker 1: off her New Year's resolutions from the previous year, and
• 9:22
  Speaker 1: instead of again, instead of letting the whole montage play out,
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: they just keep like dispersing little little bits of it
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: throughout the movie, and it's like, this is so jarring
• 9:31
  Speaker 1: and weird. And then they cut back to a scene
• 9:33
  Speaker 1: that they had already, like the Katherine Heigel storyline, and
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: it's like, just let one of these moments breathe for
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: five seconds cut away. It's that's yeah, that that was
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: the I thought the most agreed just went to where
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: they cut out of the middle of a scene of
• 9:48
  Speaker 1: Katherine Heigel and it's not John, it's not John bon Jovi.
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: It's John bon Jensen, Jensen, Bun Jensen Jensen. Uh, but
• 9:59
  Speaker 1: they cut out of the middle of it. And then
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: it's like the weirdest part of most of that like
• 10:05
  Speaker 1: thing that whole montage is that it's clear that it's
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: just zach Efron doing a d R over b roll
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: that they're not even there for there's like they cut
• 10:14
  Speaker 1: to like just be roll of a water taxi and
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: then you hear Zack got Frond saying and go in
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: a taxi in New York with no traffic check, and
• 10:24
  Speaker 1: you're like, so much of these scenes are a d
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: r um. It's I had I had fun. I will
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: say I was so frustrated because I like, I feel
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: like I had to, like for a horrible movie, you
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: have to really pay close attention to what's like. It
• 10:44
  Speaker 1: took me a really long time because I had to
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: keep pausing and because things keep happening, and you're like,
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: wait a second, there, wait a second, why did they
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: just take Hillary Swaying to the maternity ward was why
• 10:55
  Speaker 1: is that happening there? Why is she in a room
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: full of babies? And then it's over so fast and
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: then you forget right away? How are you so normally?
• 11:05
  Speaker 1: I watched the movie twice. I think normally you watch
• 11:08
  Speaker 1: whatever movie we'recovering once. We both had to watch it
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: an extra time, so I watched it three times. You
• 11:13
  Speaker 1: watched it twice just because I also knew I wasn't
• 11:16
  Speaker 1: going to retain it from the night to the morning,
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: which is sad, and that is the mark of a
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: really bad and really poorly written movie. Its like none
• 11:25
  Speaker 1: of it sticks with you, and it's so jarring, and
• 11:28
  Speaker 1: it like just gives you so much whiplash that you
• 11:31
  Speaker 1: cannot piece together any part of the narrative, Like it
• 11:36
  Speaker 1: just washes over you. It's so oh. Another one of
• 11:40
  Speaker 1: my favorite bad lines is at the end the Hilary
• 11:43
  Speaker 1: Swank ludicrous storyline, I'm like, what is gosh so weird?
• 11:48
  Speaker 1: And then at the end ludicrous is fake family shows
• 11:51
  Speaker 1: up And I've never seen an actor make it more
• 11:55
  Speaker 1: clear that this is not his actual family because he
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: because he like he walks towards these like these board children,
• 12:00
  Speaker 1: right and he's like, hello, my little rugrats, Well you're
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: not their dad. Also, why is Ludacris a cop, like
• 12:09
  Speaker 1: an NYPD cop and not just like a he's like
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: a lieutenant or something. He's like really high up in
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: the ranks. Well this is this is Through researching for
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: this very important episode, I did find out that Ludacris
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: and Richard Pryor were cousins. Did you know WHOA? I
• 12:28
  Speaker 1: didn't know that he's cousins with Richard Pryor and Monica
• 12:31
  Speaker 1: the singer. Oh what a talented family. You know it
• 12:35
  Speaker 1: turns out it's a dynasty. Um, but I'd rather see
• 12:39
  Speaker 1: that ensemble cast movie like about a comedian and two
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: musicians all in like all sharing a bloodline that's more
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: interesting than whatever drivel we get with New Year's Eve.
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: Richard Pryor is not available, Yeah, but Ludacris was available
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: for this movie. He was so available. But even though
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: he could be removed from every scene and it would
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: be no different, there was at one point truly like
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: there and and we'll get to the treatment of black
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: and brown characters in this movie because it is real
• 13:14
  Speaker 1: bad but just like the most poorly written you can imagine.
• 13:17
  Speaker 1: But there was a full like ten minutes that I
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: was convinced. I was like, is Ludicrous actually a ghost
• 13:27
  Speaker 1: because he's just sort of like in these scenes with
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: Hilary Swank being like it's gonna be okay, and she
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: never asks him really anything about himself, And I'm like,
• 13:37
  Speaker 1: is he like a ghost of New Year's past telling
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: her to go to Robert? Also Robert de Niro is
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: in this Oh, I will say, for a full disclosure,
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: I went into this movie being like, there's gonna be
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: one storyline that I'm just not going to pay attention
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: to at all because there are too many, and so
• 13:57
  Speaker 1: I was like, one's gotta go, and I chose as
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: a character to pay attention during zero of their scenes.
• 14:03
  Speaker 1: I chose Josh de Mel. Oh I didn't pay attention
• 14:06
  Speaker 1: to a single scene that Josh Deml was in. I
• 14:09
  Speaker 1: know he ends up with Sarah Jessica Parker, but I
• 14:12
  Speaker 1: wasn't paying attention to Josh de Mel. I don't want
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: to learn. I feel like I've gotten this far in
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: life without learning who Josh Deml is, and I like,
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: I just don't really want to know who he is
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: Fergie's husband question mark. I think that's the main thing
• 14:28
  Speaker 1: you need to know about it. That's not to see that.
• 14:31
  Speaker 1: Wouldn't have expected that, Um, I didn't. I just was like, oh,
• 14:36
  Speaker 1: I recognized this guy, but I don't want to look
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: at him. Um. And so I ignored his storyline, but
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: every all the other ones I paid very close attention.
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: I'll fill in the gaps the Josh Jamal what's his name? Josh,
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: I have no idea, I have no don't take my
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: word for it. I literally fast forward it through his scenes.
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: You not having paid attention to it, will not like
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: someone who did pay attention to it will have no
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: better understanding of what happens in his story than someone
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: who did not pay attention at all. So you missed
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: truly nothing. He's Tad Hamilton's and when a date with
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: Tad Hamilton's. Oh yeah, he's in at least one of
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: the Transformers movies and some other stuff. Who is this man?
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: I'm just not interested? Um, I guess yeah, let's let's see.
• 15:25
  Speaker 1: Let's see. Yeah. I don't know how to recap this
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: exact in the year on the most difficult recap of
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: all time. Okay, I mean it's not unlike Cats in
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: that a bunch of characters just keep getting introduced and
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: introduced and introduced, and then there's no story, and then
• 15:44
  Speaker 1: there's a climax sort of and then it's the end.
• 15:49
  Speaker 1: So it's really similar structurally to Cats if you think
• 15:52
  Speaker 1: about it anyway. You gotta hand it to New Year's Eve.
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: So again, this is like an ensemblement movie in the
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: vein of love. Actually, it's trying very hard to be
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: love actually and not succeeding, and that is embarrassing. But um,
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: we're in New York City. It is New Year's Eve. Day.
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: I think there are like seven main storylines, but then
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: a couple of them kind of morphed together by the end,
• 16:17
  Speaker 1: so it's sort of hard in a way that goes
• 16:19
  Speaker 1: to be like wow, but it's this, This is like
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: they're really reaching for love actually, because some of the
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: stories intersect there. But it's like, and it doesn't work
• 16:27
  Speaker 1: for me in that movie either, but this one is like, huh,
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: why would you do that? It fails, We don't care,
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: So it's worth mentioning New York City in a way
• 16:37
  Speaker 1: is the main character is really the protagonist of the film.
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: It's just kind of a love letter to New York.
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: I love the part where Robert de Niro is like, ah,
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: that New York Air. You're like, yeah, that's disgusting, that
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: New York Air as it smells like trash all the time.
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: It smells like something really wet that you can identify,
• 16:57
  Speaker 1: like awesome. Yeah. They named all the segments, uh, really
• 17:01
  Speaker 1: boring and that did you see in the credits where
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: they're like resolution tour, hospital Story, Maternity, Ward Jensen and
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: Laura's story, Ellen the Mother Daughter, a Hearn party, Times Square.
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: This is so the pinnacle of creativity if you ask me, okay,
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: so um. The other note about this is that I'm
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: going to use actors names instead of characters names, just
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: for the sake of clarity, because there are truly dozens
• 17:31
  Speaker 1: and dozens of characters, um, and most of them are
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: played by famous people, so that'll just make everything more clear.
• 17:40
  Speaker 1: I'm also probably gonna, like accidentally or on purpose, leave
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: some stuff out of this recap because there's just like
• 17:45
  Speaker 1: far too much to even talk about. But here's the gist. So.
• 17:50
  Speaker 1: One story revolves around Hilary Swank. She is the VP
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: of the Times Square Alliance and she is in charge
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: of the famous ball drop at midnight, she flips a
• 18:01
  Speaker 1: gigantic light switch and that's her whole thing. But she
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: has vertigo, so Chris has a cop right sure. Another
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: story revolves around Zac Efron, who is a bike courier
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: and he really wants to do some like big epic
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: party for New Year's Eve that night with Ashton Kutcher,
• 18:23
  Speaker 1: his roommate. With Ashton Kutcher his roommate, Um, he drops
• 18:27
  Speaker 1: something off a package for Michelle Peffer at her office
• 18:32
  Speaker 1: at a record company, and that turns out to be
• 18:34
  Speaker 1: four tickets to this very exclusive party that Zach would
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: love to go to, but she's like, get away from me,
• 18:41
  Speaker 1: and then she quits her shitty job with her shitty boss,
• 18:45
  Speaker 1: John Lisco. John Litco is the only person who knows
• 18:49
  Speaker 1: what movie he's in, and he has such a fun performance.
• 18:53
  Speaker 1: He goes like because she works at like a record
• 18:55
  Speaker 1: that ahearn record company, and he's like, yes, you know,
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: it's very not bad year for music, music piracy, blah
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: blah blah. It's like, did you just skip over some
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: of the script. And then when she says I quit,
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: he goes, you can't quit. It's Grammy season. I was like,
• 19:14
  Speaker 1: this is so vague. Michelle Phifer's wig is so distracting. Really,
• 19:21
  Speaker 1: I'm like she we were texting about this last night.
• 19:24
  Speaker 1: But it's like everyone in this movie is playing themselves
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: except for Michelle Pfeiffer, who is like doing this character. Yeah,
• 19:32
  Speaker 1: and okay, here's what's really did you get this sense
• 19:34
  Speaker 1: to when you first watched the movie and you're first
• 19:37
  Speaker 1: introduced to her character she has seen getting off of
• 19:39
  Speaker 1: a bus. She's holding a piece of paper. It makes
• 19:42
  Speaker 1: it seem like this is her like first time in
• 19:44
  Speaker 1: New York because immediately after that she almost she like
• 19:48
  Speaker 1: goes to cross the street and then almost gets hit
• 19:51
  Speaker 1: by a cab and then has to like twirl around
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: and then Pratt falls into a pile of trash. But
• 19:57
  Speaker 1: then you find out she's lived here for years, right,
• 20:00
  Speaker 1: So I'm like, why would you set up this character
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: that way? Like that so much reads as like she
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: just got off the bus in New York City where
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: she's never been before, and she doesn't know how to
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: cross the street or she doesn't know how to like
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: navigate through the city. That's like a trope. Like you
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: you see that shot and you're like, oh, I know
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: what's happening, But then they make it they twisted for
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: no reason. It's so weird. Like the way that this
• 20:27
  Speaker 1: character is written is just like I don't even know
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: if it's sexisty, I know, it makes no sense. I know,
• 20:33
  Speaker 1: like I I guess it is sexist, but it's so
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: nonsensical that you're just like, what were they trying to do?
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: Even like she doesn't seem to know what her job is,
• 20:44
  Speaker 1: or like she she doesn't I don't know what her
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: job is, but she also doesn't know what her job is.
• 20:49
  Speaker 1: Zach Efron comes to deliver her the mail every day,
• 20:53
  Speaker 1: but he says he's a bike courier, not a male man.
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: And then he says, I've seen you every I've brought
• 20:58
  Speaker 1: you a package every day this year, and you've never
• 21:00
  Speaker 1: looked at me, which is like, uh, if Zach Effron
• 21:03
  Speaker 1: delivered me a package every day, I would like no,
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: you know, and not look at anything else. I would
• 21:10
  Speaker 1: be thinking about him constantly. And then she's invited to
• 21:13
  Speaker 1: like this cool party, this like big record label party,
• 21:17
  Speaker 1: the record label she is currently working at. And then
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: he's like, oh wow, that's a really cool party and
• 21:24
  Speaker 1: she's like, really, what is it. I'm like, you work here,
• 21:27
  Speaker 1: what are you talking about? If it truly? I like that?
• 21:31
  Speaker 1: And finally I like that Zach Efron's character's name is Paul. Paul.
• 21:37
  Speaker 1: Here's a whole there's that whole thing where he sings
• 21:39
  Speaker 1: that little song he goes, give all the chance to
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: show you what I can do. It's like, what if
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: his character's name isn't Paul? And he was just kind
• 21:48
  Speaker 1: of guessing, Oh, funny, Sorry, this is a disaster. I know. Well,
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: the record company that Michelle Peiffer works at is the
• 21:59
  Speaker 1: same card company that is owned by Josh Dummel's character's
• 22:06
  Speaker 1: mother and his storyline. His storyline is that he is
• 22:11
  Speaker 1: trying to make his way to New York from Connecticut,
• 22:15
  Speaker 1: where he like was just the witness of its friend's
• 22:17
  Speaker 1: wedding or something on the morning of New Year's Eve. Sure, yeah,
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: people have weddings then not absolutely made no assent, Like
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: I just like, who are these people? Okay, we just
• 22:29
  Speaker 1: need to get him. We haven't even gotten to Jessica
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: Beale's unvaccinated fetus unbelievable. She an anti vaxer, big time
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: anti vaxer. Very weird seeing her play a pregnant lady
• 22:44
  Speaker 1: because you're like, this kid is in for a world
• 22:47
  Speaker 1: of heart horrifying. She's bad. Well, Josh Jamel is trying
• 22:52
  Speaker 1: to get to New York because he is giving a
• 22:54
  Speaker 1: speech at an event which turns out to be the
• 22:57
  Speaker 1: party that Zeke Efron is trying to go to, and
• 23:00
  Speaker 1: he's also considering meeting up with a woman who he
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: met last New Year's Eve, so that's his setup. Um
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: onto zac Efron's roommate, Ashton Kutcher. He hates New Year's Eve.
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: He's a grinch about New Year's here re arranges the
• 23:17
  Speaker 1: sign this is happy New Year's even makes it say
• 23:19
  Speaker 1: crappy New Year's Eve? Where did those letters come from?
• 23:23
  Speaker 1: Where did the scene in the art come from? How
• 23:26
  Speaker 1: did you get that? This is the worst written movie
• 23:31
  Speaker 1: of all time? More like crappy New Year's Eve? Ashton
• 23:34
  Speaker 1: Kutcher is so bad. I mean he's so bad and
• 23:37
  Speaker 1: really honestly most movies. Um, but have you ever seen jobs,
• 23:41
  Speaker 1: Steve Jobs? You've seen jobs there? Well? There there are
• 23:46
  Speaker 1: a few moments in the elevator where he's channeling jobs.
• 23:49
  Speaker 1: When he goes an illustrator, You're like, oh, that's like
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: he's prepping for jobs anyway. Sorry, he doesn't want to
• 23:57
  Speaker 1: do anything to celebrate New Year's Eve, and he's on
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: his way to like throw out a bunch of New
• 24:01
  Speaker 1: Year's decorations, but oh no, he gets stuck in his
• 24:05
  Speaker 1: apartment buildings elevator with Leah Michelle. Is that how you
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: say her name? William Michelle? Yeah, so we have in
• 24:12
  Speaker 1: this storyline, we have, um, Leah Michelle, a confirmed racist,
• 24:17
  Speaker 1: and Ashton Kutcher, an early investor in Uber and the
• 24:21
  Speaker 1: worst actor of all time. And we're supposed to be
• 24:24
  Speaker 1: like you should kiss and I'm like I need to
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: get out of these scenes as quickly as possible. Uh So,
• 24:31
  Speaker 1: Lea Michelle is on her way to be a backup
• 24:34
  Speaker 1: singer for Jon bon Jovi a k A. Jensen bon Jensen,
• 24:39
  Speaker 1: and he is playing the like televised Times Square Ball
• 24:44
  Speaker 1: Drop Concert like Ryan Seacrest hosted, Blah blah blah that
• 24:48
  Speaker 1: whole thing. He has a romantic history with Katherine Heigel,
• 24:53
  Speaker 1: who is catering the Big A Hearn Records after party.
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: That's with her co workers Russell Peters and Sophia Vergara. Yes,
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: then we meet Sarah Michelle Geller. She wants to spend
• 25:08
  Speaker 1: the evening with her daughter, Abigail Treslin. Sorry, you mean
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: Sarah Jessica Parker. What did I say, Sarah Michelle Geller.
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: I keep doing that and I literally named Sarah. It
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: makes sense, that makes it. Meanwhile, Sarah Jessica Parker. I
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: even have that written down and I still said the
• 25:25
  Speaker 1: wrong thing. Okay. It took me a second to be like, wait,
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: who is it? Then I couldn't remember Sarah Michelle Geller's
• 25:32
  Speaker 1: Sarah Jessica Parker. Okay, we have to leave this in
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: Sarah Jessica Parker wants to spend the evening with her daughter,
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: Abigail Breslin, but Abigail is trying to go to Times
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: Square with her friends and she wants to kiss her
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: crush at midnight. Yeah. She also lifts her shirt in
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: the middle of a train station in their first seen
• 26:00
  Speaker 1: because reasons. I was horrified to see that. It is
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: so weird. She's fifteen in this movie, and um, why
• 26:11
  Speaker 1: do that it? It doesn't make sense for a character
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: to do. It doesn't make sense for Gary Marshall to
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: tell a child to do it doesn't even make sense
• 26:20
  Speaker 1: for her character. She's not kind of like her character
• 26:23
  Speaker 1: isn't like wooho, look at me, Like she's not an exhibitionist.
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: He nothing about it. It makes any sense tracks And
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: on top of that, it's like, yeah, why is a
• 26:35
  Speaker 1: child lifting up her shirt and exposing her bra in public?
• 26:38
  Speaker 1: And why is her mom not reacting to that? She
• 26:41
  Speaker 1: her mom, well, her mom does say this isn't girls
• 26:44
  Speaker 1: gone wild? And she like runs over to like she
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: runs over to like cover her up, and I've seen
• 26:52
  Speaker 1: that does tragically pass the Bechtel test. I'm just realizing
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: that Leah Michelle's character was named Elise. Yeah, it's so weird.
• 27:04
  Speaker 1: It's like some characters get full names in this movie,
• 27:07
  Speaker 1: other characters don't. Like zac Efron is only known as
• 27:11
  Speaker 1: Paul Um, but Michelle Peiffer is constantly referred to as
• 27:15
  Speaker 1: Ingrid Withers, like her full name all the time, like
• 27:18
  Speaker 1: why why, which I feel like it is, like, hey, audience,
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: in case you didn't know, this is a character who
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: is far far older than zac Efron. See she has
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: an old person name Ingrid Withers, whereas he is young
• 27:34
  Speaker 1: and cool, and therefore he is Paul. I don't know.
• 27:41
  Speaker 1: I'm not sure rooting for them. So that's Sarah Jessica Parker,
• 27:47
  Speaker 1: not Sarah Michelle Geller. So that's her storyline with Abigail Breslin.
• 27:51
  Speaker 1: Then we cut to a hospital where Robert de Niro
• 27:55
  Speaker 1: is dying. Halle Berry is a nurse who tends to
• 28:00
  Speaker 1: him his nurse, his nurse who he thinks is his
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: wife sometimes um. Yes. His dying wish is to see
• 28:08
  Speaker 1: the ball drop in Times Square one last time with
• 28:11
  Speaker 1: his own eyes. He wants to go up on the roof,
• 28:13
  Speaker 1: but his doctor Carrie and then I'm going to have
• 28:16
  Speaker 1: like a you and McGregor moment here because I don't
• 28:20
  Speaker 1: know how to say his last name. He's the guy
• 28:22
  Speaker 1: from what could be Princess Bride, Princess Bride guy. This okay,
• 28:28
  Speaker 1: This whole thing with Robert de Niro is so vague.
• 28:32
  Speaker 1: On the second watch, I was like, maybe I will
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: figure out what is going on here. It seems like
• 28:37
  Speaker 1: he is in the late stages of cancer. He has
• 28:41
  Speaker 1: stopped refusing or he has started to refuse treatment, which
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: does happen. But then he's like, I didn't. Do you
• 28:48
  Speaker 1: think I came here because the hospital is good. No,
• 28:51
  Speaker 1: I came here because I want to get on the
• 28:54
  Speaker 1: roof of this hospital. And you're like huh, And then
• 28:56
  Speaker 1: he keeps saying. It was like, on my second watch,
• 28:59
  Speaker 1: I was racking up because his whole thing is he's like,
• 29:03
  Speaker 1: just take me up on the roof so I can die,
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: and it's this whole thing. And then when everyone's like
• 29:10
  Speaker 1: why why do you want to why why? And he's
• 29:13
  Speaker 1: like I'm an asshole or he's like I've been I've
• 29:17
  Speaker 1: made so many bad choices. But he never says what
• 29:19
  Speaker 1: any of those choices are. No one ever do we
• 29:23
  Speaker 1: even did I miss something? Does he say what he
• 29:25
  Speaker 1: did that was bad because he keeps being like, I'm
• 29:28
  Speaker 1: an ass, I made so many mistakes and you're like,
• 29:32
  Speaker 1: were you like fracking? Like what are you doing that
• 29:36
  Speaker 1: is so bad that you want to die today? Like
• 29:39
  Speaker 1: it's just so weird. Um. I don't think they specify.
• 29:43
  Speaker 1: My impression was that he was just sort of like
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: an absentee father and husband kind of person. It's the
• 29:51
  Speaker 1: way he was talking made it sound like he had
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: done something really or some like because if because like
• 29:58
  Speaker 1: most maybe as a generalization, but like most parents who
• 30:02
  Speaker 1: worked a lot aren't like I need to die right
• 30:05
  Speaker 1: now because I feel bad that I had to work.
• 30:08
  Speaker 1: Like it sounds like he did something bad. It sounds
• 30:11
  Speaker 1: like he really fucked you. And I kind of him
• 30:14
  Speaker 1: curious as to like what he did, because he's clearly
• 30:19
  Speaker 1: racked with gilt over something. Right, But don't worry, he'll
• 30:24
  Speaker 1: get a redemption arc because it's a holiday season movie.
• 30:27
  Speaker 1: Maybe he was like Henry Kissinger's assistant or something like
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: like something this man did something really bad. Otherwise he
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: would not be telling anyone who will listen that he
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: was a bad person and needs to die right now.
• 30:41
  Speaker 1: I don't know, Well, something's going on meanwhile at the
• 30:45
  Speaker 1: same hospital question mark Sarah Paulson, Oh yeah, I didn't
• 30:49
  Speaker 1: even think of that. I think it's the same one,
• 30:51
  Speaker 1: but I'm not totally sure. Um, Sarah Paulson and Jessica
• 30:55
  Speaker 1: Biel are both extremely gregnant. And the thing with this
• 31:00
  Speaker 1: hospital is that if you are the first person to
• 31:03
  Speaker 1: give birth on New Year's Day, that family wins dollars
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: from that hospital. And like, huh, is that is that
• 31:13
  Speaker 1: a thing that happened? Maybe I don't know, um, but
• 31:16
  Speaker 1: they are both vying for this grand and Jessica Biale
• 31:21
  Speaker 1: is married to Seth Meyers. Sure right. There's also it's
• 31:26
  Speaker 1: like a good like there's not one Like I would say,
• 31:31
  Speaker 1: I would argue that if I had to choose a
• 31:33
  Speaker 1: pairing and none of the pairing seth chemistry. But I
• 31:36
  Speaker 1: had to be like, who has the most chemistry, I
• 31:38
  Speaker 1: would honestly probably say Zach Effron and Michelle Pfeiffer. And
• 31:41
  Speaker 1: that's not a compliment, like they don't have a lot
• 31:44
  Speaker 1: of chemistry, but everyone else is just like they're just
• 31:47
  Speaker 1: saying lines near each other, like I feel like everyone's
• 31:50
  Speaker 1: missing each other's eyeline, And I mean and I feel like, yeah,
• 31:56
  Speaker 1: that my my two bottom couples are definitely Seth Meyers
• 31:59
  Speaker 1: and Jessica Beale horrible and who wait, keep losing track
• 32:05
  Speaker 1: of who is even where? Oh? Aston Catcher and Lea
• 32:08
  Speaker 1: Michelle those are my bottom right. I truly could not
• 32:12
  Speaker 1: track the logic of that relationship. And then Sarah Paulson
• 32:16
  Speaker 1: is married to I know is married to Till Schweiger,
• 32:22
  Speaker 1: who I wrote down in my notes brilliantly. But he
• 32:25
  Speaker 1: looks like he should be the villain of a National
• 32:28
  Speaker 1: Treasure movie. So oh, he definitely does. Wow. I did
• 32:34
  Speaker 1: not know who this man is. He is that bad.
• 32:37
  Speaker 1: I have no idea who is. He's a German actor
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: who's in some American cinema, but he's also in a
• 32:44
  Speaker 1: lot of German films. Um, yeah, I recognize him, but
• 32:48
  Speaker 1: I don't. I couldn't. I like had to look up
• 32:49
  Speaker 1: his name. He I didn't like his character. His character
• 32:53
  Speaker 1: was really aggressive. He also like runs a charm school. Randomly, like,
• 32:58
  Speaker 1: why do we learn what his job is? It has
• 33:00
  Speaker 1: nothing to do with anything. I did not. I didn't
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: catch on the first one, and then the second one.
• 33:05
  Speaker 1: I was like, why would you add this detail? The Yeah,
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: he runs a charm school, which is like, um, I guess,
• 33:14
  Speaker 1: but also he's not very charming, so I don't know,
• 33:16
  Speaker 1: like what my my, I think one of my top
• 33:20
  Speaker 1: worst moments of the movie is when so like it
• 33:23
  Speaker 1: becomes this weird masculine race to who can get their
• 33:28
  Speaker 1: wives water to break the fastest, which is first of all,
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: a really gross premise for a vignyet and so it's
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: it's like Till Schweiger and Seth Meyers being like, my
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: wife's gonna water break any minute, and I'm making her
• 33:46
  Speaker 1: eat an chovies and You're like, this is so gross.
• 33:49
  Speaker 1: And then Sarah Paulson goes up to tell Schweiger and
• 33:51
  Speaker 1: like apologizes to him because her water hasn't broken yet.
• 33:55
  Speaker 1: I'm like, that's so bleak. She's like, I'm sorry, honey.
• 33:58
  Speaker 1: I don't think we're going to get the money because
• 34:00
  Speaker 1: I couldn't induce labor on command. Like, also, Sarah Paulson,
• 34:06
  Speaker 1: did you feel I felt that Sarah Paulson's pregnancy looked
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: extra fake, like way faker than Jessica Bale's. I don't
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: know what, like, but Sarah pauls it couldn't have been
• 34:17
  Speaker 1: clear to me that they just like velcrode something on
• 34:19
  Speaker 1: it just like stuffed with lumpy pillow up into her shirt,
• 34:23
  Speaker 1: Like why did she get a worse did they only
• 34:24
  Speaker 1: have two? And then Jessica bials like I get the
• 34:27
  Speaker 1: good one. I don't know. Sarah Paulson's looked super fake.
• 34:30
  Speaker 1: Well I'm guessing like fifty of the budget went to
• 34:32
  Speaker 1: paying bon Jovi, so I don't know shot budgensons. I
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: can't get over it. Yeah, so yeah, she plays this
• 34:43
  Speaker 1: is like early. I was trying to figure out is
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: this um oh oh this wait, okay, I just learned
• 34:50
  Speaker 1: something interesting. Oh please tell me. Sarah Paulson and Cherry
• 34:53
  Speaker 1: Jones were together from two thousand four to two thousand nine,
• 34:57
  Speaker 1: meaning that they were recent x's at the time of
• 35:00
  Speaker 1: this movie. I don't know. That has nothing to do
• 35:02
  Speaker 1: with anything. I just didn't know that. I was trying
• 35:04
  Speaker 1: to figure out if this if this movie came out
• 35:07
  Speaker 1: when Sarah Paulson was famous, or if this was a
• 35:09
  Speaker 1: movie that she did, like right before she got famous,
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: because she got famous doing like American Horror Story and stuff.
• 35:16
  Speaker 1: But I don't know when that was. I feel like
• 35:19
  Speaker 1: this was either right around then the cusp of them,
• 35:22
  Speaker 1: or just like right before that, right it had to,
• 35:25
  Speaker 1: because it's like there's some people it's it's really hard
• 35:28
  Speaker 1: to because like these movies are so in the moment
• 35:30
  Speaker 1: that it's kind of some people are bigger stars than
• 35:33
  Speaker 1: they used to be, and then other people are presented
• 35:35
  Speaker 1: as huge stars and now they're kind of not and
• 35:38
  Speaker 1: so it's just very jarring, Like it's very much a
• 35:41
  Speaker 1: time capsule of this is like peek Lea Michelle when now,
• 35:45
  Speaker 1: like everyone this was like, so, I think we were
• 35:51
  Speaker 1: supposed to be excited about that Katherine Heigel. It's always
• 35:54
  Speaker 1: weird to be like and now it's Katherine Heigel and
• 35:56
  Speaker 1: everyone was like, so what you know, but an other
• 36:00
  Speaker 1: person who is who has ended up, you know, being
• 36:03
  Speaker 1: exposed as as a villainous person. Oh no, what did
• 36:07
  Speaker 1: she do? She was accused of a bunch of similar
• 36:11
  Speaker 1: to Lea Michelle, a bunch of racist micro aggressions on
• 36:15
  Speaker 1: the set of Gray's Anatomy, much like Lea Michelle did
• 36:20
  Speaker 1: on Glee. So, um, yeah, I guess my apologist those people. Yeah, okay,
• 36:30
  Speaker 1: so that is the setup for all of these storylines.
• 36:33
  Speaker 1: Let's take a quick break and then we'll come back
• 36:36
  Speaker 1: and see what happens next and we're back, all right,
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: So here are the stories that unfold. I guess um,
• 36:52
  Speaker 1: the pregnant women start to try to induce labor. I
• 36:56
  Speaker 1: hate this scene with Jessica Bielle and the anchovy I'm
• 37:00
  Speaker 1: all right, I just can't get over it, so nastysty
• 37:03
  Speaker 1: bon Jovi, meanwhile, is trying to win back Katherine Heigel
• 37:07
  Speaker 1: after bailing on their engagement last year, which we learn
• 37:11
  Speaker 1: in very expository dialogue. It's so okay. That made me
• 37:15
  Speaker 1: laugh so much because there he John bon Jensen is
• 37:19
  Speaker 1: such a disaster in this Like he keeps wandering around
• 37:22
  Speaker 1: being like I don't understand. Why won't you give me
• 37:24
  Speaker 1: another chance? And then Sophia for Car is like, well
• 37:27
  Speaker 1: what did you do? He's like, well, I proposed to
• 37:29
  Speaker 1: her and then I immediately disappeared last year. And I'm like, well,
• 37:33
  Speaker 1: of course she hates you. What are you talking? Rights like,
• 37:35
  Speaker 1: I don't understand. He's like, she also two years old.
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: I'm like, how could you not understand? She? Katherine Heigel
• 37:44
  Speaker 1: is like I didn't even get to cook you one
• 37:47
  Speaker 1: meal in our apartment together, and it's like women cooking,
• 37:51
  Speaker 1: Like why would that be the thing? She says a chef,
• 37:55
  Speaker 1: but yeah, she's she's like a fancy chef. But even
• 37:57
  Speaker 1: so like that whole like, I mean, talk about two
• 38:01
  Speaker 1: people that have no chemistry. Chemistry. Jon bon Jensen is
• 38:05
  Speaker 1: struggling just to like seem like he is acting like
• 38:09
  Speaker 1: he cannot act and he's trying so hard, and he's
• 38:12
  Speaker 1: just something about the way he enters scenes I found
• 38:16
  Speaker 1: very jarring and clear that he wasn't an actor, because
• 38:18
  Speaker 1: he just seems like he's wandering into like a kitchen
• 38:22
  Speaker 1: and you're like, get out, what are you doing in here?
• 38:24
  Speaker 1: Growth There's a similar phenomenon happening with Ludicros, where like
• 38:28
  Speaker 1: suddenly he just like swivels around in a chair and
• 38:31
  Speaker 1: he's like Hi, That's why I thought there, Yeah, the
• 38:36
  Speaker 1: musicians in this movie are really clearly musicians and not
• 38:39
  Speaker 1: not actors. I mean, Ludicrous is being done a disservice.
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: Everyone's being done a disservice, but Ludacris is being done
• 38:47
  Speaker 1: an extra disservice. But he is like just kind of
• 38:50
  Speaker 1: all of a sudden there he's just all He's just
• 38:53
  Speaker 1: like Hilary Swank is my best friend, and she's afraid
• 38:56
  Speaker 1: of heights, and as we know, I'm gonna I just
• 38:59
  Speaker 1: the fact that he has a cop pick Hillary Swank up,
• 39:03
  Speaker 1: and it's like, I love my friend and this is
• 39:06
  Speaker 1: how I help her. I have my coworker pick her up.
• 39:08
  Speaker 1: And you're just like, I hate this friends. Stop makes
• 39:13
  Speaker 1: no sense. Um okay. Meanwhile, Abigail Breslin sneaks out of
• 39:18
  Speaker 1: her apartment, and that makes it sound like she has
• 39:21
  Speaker 1: her own apartment. She sneaks out of the apartment that
• 39:23
  Speaker 1: she lives in with her mom, whose name is either
• 39:25
  Speaker 1: Sarah Michelle Gallery or Sarah Jessica Parker. We don't know
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: our character name, and we're not going to look it up.
• 39:31
  Speaker 1: We simply don't care. She sneaks out and goes to
• 39:34
  Speaker 1: Times Square and then her mom like tries to chase
• 39:37
  Speaker 1: after her and figure out where she's gone. Meanwhile, Josh
• 39:41
  Speaker 1: Dummel crashes his car and then has to hit your
• 39:45
  Speaker 1: ride in an RV with a pastor and either the
• 39:49
  Speaker 1: pastor or the pastor's his wife, horny dad making very
• 39:55
  Speaker 1: gross comments the whole way. Um. Like, then, back in
• 40:02
  Speaker 1: New York City, Robert de Niro is like expressing all
• 40:05
  Speaker 1: of his regrets about not being a better person. It's
• 40:09
  Speaker 1: all very vague. We're like, what did you do? I
• 40:11
  Speaker 1: think he like he has to be like working high
• 40:15
  Speaker 1: up in the government, and like I was gonna say,
• 40:17
  Speaker 1: like he was he like the president of some like
• 40:22
  Speaker 1: um could be Wall Street. Maybe they're in New York.
• 40:25
  Speaker 1: I just feel like Robert de niro characters don't feel
• 40:28
  Speaker 1: guilty over like nothing, you know, like he plays very
• 40:32
  Speaker 1: hardened characters. Right, his character did something really bad. Maybe
• 40:38
  Speaker 1: maybe he's playing the same character that he did in
• 40:40
  Speaker 1: Taxi Driver and his character and Taxi Driver does some
• 40:44
  Speaker 1: very fucked up stuff. That's the Canada. He's on his
• 40:47
  Speaker 1: death bed being like I just want to see the
• 40:50
  Speaker 1: ball drop with my daughter. Hilary Swank. So weird. The twist.
• 40:56
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, by the way, spoiler alert the twist, Hilary
• 40:59
  Speaker 1: Swank is his daughter. Yeah, what does he die? At
• 41:01
  Speaker 1: the end? He does, I'm pretty sure because she's like
• 41:04
  Speaker 1: holding his like personal items, as if he passed away.
• 41:09
  Speaker 1: That is so confusing because on the first I realized
• 41:13
  Speaker 1: at the end of my first viewing, I'm like, I
• 41:14
  Speaker 1: don't even know if he lived. At the end, no,
• 41:17
  Speaker 1: I think he dies and then it's like the stroke
• 41:19
  Speaker 1: of midnight or something like did he die on the roof,
• 41:23
  Speaker 1: because that was the other thing. I'm like, Hallie Berry
• 41:24
  Speaker 1: is about to lose her job. She lets Hilary Swank
• 41:29
  Speaker 1: like abduct her dying father to bring him to the roof.
• 41:33
  Speaker 1: And then Hallie Berry is like, I know, it's all good.
• 41:37
  Speaker 1: She's like, I'm too busy. I skyping with common who's
• 41:40
  Speaker 1: overseas in the military, who was nominated for an award
• 41:45
  Speaker 1: for that yet I saw that, um, But so Hallie
• 41:50
  Speaker 1: Berry is like whatever, but then yeah, it seems like
• 41:53
  Speaker 1: maybe he possibly died on the roof. And then she
• 41:55
  Speaker 1: had to like, what bring her father's right, and then
• 41:59
  Speaker 1: just be like verd of all, Hillary's might be accused
• 42:02
  Speaker 1: of murder if there is not if there is not
• 42:06
  Speaker 1: good video surveillance of like what exactly happened, She's in
• 42:10
  Speaker 1: a lot of trouble, true. But instead she's just pulled
• 42:13
  Speaker 1: into a room full of infants and they're like, look
• 42:16
  Speaker 1: at these Do you feel better? And she's like, yes, right,
• 42:21
  Speaker 1: it's like her dad died, but now she's looking at newborn's.
• 42:24
  Speaker 1: It's the circle of life. Some people die, some people
• 42:27
  Speaker 1: are born. Wow. I yeah. And also I felt like
• 42:32
  Speaker 1: there was just a weird element of and maybe I'm
• 42:34
  Speaker 1: like overthinking a little bit, but I'm like, oh, nothing
• 42:37
  Speaker 1: cheers up a woman like a room full of babies,
• 42:40
  Speaker 1: because women be wanting babies really bad. There's so many
• 42:45
  Speaker 1: like stereotypes, and we'll talk about them, but like women
• 42:49
  Speaker 1: stereotyped in a particular way happens countless times in this movie. Yeah, um, okay,
• 42:56
  Speaker 1: so what happens nex um zac Efron. He is taking
• 43:00
  Speaker 1: Michelle Cifer all around the city to check off her
• 43:02
  Speaker 1: New Year's resolutions. And then Ryan Seacrest as himself. Funny,
• 43:08
  Speaker 1: He's one of the few celebrities in the movie who
• 43:11
  Speaker 1: is actually playing himself. It's so funny. So like half
• 43:13
  Speaker 1: of this cast has been canceled since this movie came out,
• 43:17
  Speaker 1: Like it's like astounding. And then on top of that,
• 43:21
  Speaker 1: Michael Bloomberg comes out and you're like shocking. Um. So
• 43:28
  Speaker 1: Ryan Seacrest is like, all right, everyone, it's six pm
• 43:31
  Speaker 1: in Times Square. Let's raise the ball so that we
• 43:34
  Speaker 1: can drop it at midnight. So they go to raise it,
• 43:37
  Speaker 1: but oh no, it's broken and it won't go up.
• 43:40
  Speaker 1: So then Hilary Swain has to call someone named Kaminski,
• 43:43
  Speaker 1: who turns out to be Eldo died and you're like, oh,
• 43:49
  Speaker 1: I want so much better for him than this caricature
• 43:52
  Speaker 1: of a of a character. Yeah, so Hector Elisondo shows
• 43:57
  Speaker 1: up to fix the ball, and then Hilary Swank gives
• 44:01
  Speaker 1: this like what is meant to be a moving speech
• 44:04
  Speaker 1: that is televised across the entire nation. For some reason,
• 44:09
  Speaker 1: everyone sees it in Times Square. At Times Square is
• 44:11
  Speaker 1: silent captivated by Hillary Swank's speech. I also let there's
• 44:17
  Speaker 1: so many like details of this movie, like in in
• 44:22
  Speaker 1: Times Square specifically where there's like a huge poster for
• 44:26
  Speaker 1: Sherlock Holmes Trunk of Secrets or whatever. The fun The
• 44:29
  Speaker 1: second movie was starring Robert Downey. Oh, sorry, Sherlock Holmes
• 44:33
  Speaker 1: A Game of Shadow. I was gonna call a Book
• 44:36
  Speaker 1: of Shadows, but I think that might be the National Treasures.
• 44:38
  Speaker 1: It is a Game of Shadows, Trunk of Secrets. It
• 44:43
  Speaker 1: was all it's all the same, but they're they're like
• 44:46
  Speaker 1: heavily advertising an extremely Sherlock Holmes A movie is actually
• 44:52
  Speaker 1: what it's called disaster. Okay, so everyone sees this speech. Meanwhile,
• 44:59
  Speaker 1: Leah Michelle and Ashton Kutcher have started to bond. They're
• 45:03
  Speaker 1: about to kiss, but then the elevator starts back up
• 45:05
  Speaker 1: again and she has to leave to go sting for
• 45:07
  Speaker 1: Jensen bon Jensen. Also he's so rude to her. She
• 45:11
  Speaker 1: she like, he's like, what are you a groupie? And like, uh,
• 45:14
  Speaker 1: have some respects, sir. She's John Bond, Jensen's backup singer,
• 45:20
  Speaker 1: like this is the worst of me. And he's like,
• 45:24
  Speaker 1: I'm an illustrator, Like I did not want them to kiss.
• 45:29
  Speaker 1: I was thrilled they didn't get to kiss, but they
• 45:31
  Speaker 1: do later I know. Well. And there's also like it
• 45:35
  Speaker 1: goes without like you can tell by looking at the
• 45:36
  Speaker 1: poster and the year this movie came out that there's
• 45:39
  Speaker 1: just like no consent in the entire people just like
• 45:43
  Speaker 1: launching each other at each other's heads. It's gross to
• 45:46
  Speaker 1: look at. I have a list of all the like
• 45:48
  Speaker 1: the sexual harassment and sexual misconduct that happens in the movie.
• 45:53
  Speaker 1: It's horror genuinely nasty. Yeah, okay. So meanwhile, zac Efron
• 45:58
  Speaker 1: is really close to getting his tickets to this exclusive party,
• 46:02
  Speaker 1: but then Michelle Phiffer overhears him calling her pathetic because
• 46:06
  Speaker 1: he's screaming in an open room with three feet away
• 46:10
  Speaker 1: from her. He's like, hello, I'm with this lady. She's
• 46:15
  Speaker 1: fucking pathetic. And then she's like I She's like, I'm
• 46:21
  Speaker 1: right here. I heard that. And he's like, oh my god,
• 46:23
  Speaker 1: I'm so sorry. What are you doing? What do you
• 46:27
  Speaker 1: think was going to happen? So she's like, I don't
• 46:30
  Speaker 1: want to do this anymore, and he thinks that he
• 46:32
  Speaker 1: blew it. But then he's like, I'm so sorry. I'm
• 46:34
  Speaker 1: gonna make this up to you and I'm going to
• 46:36
  Speaker 1: amaze you and and all of your resolutions are gonna
• 46:39
  Speaker 1: come true and blah blah blah, all this stuff. Okay,
• 46:41
  Speaker 1: the scene where he you know, the one I'm talking about.
• 46:44
  Speaker 1: The scene where all of a sudden Michelle Phifer is
• 46:46
  Speaker 1: in like Spider Man turn off the dark, like like
• 46:50
  Speaker 1: they're just flinging her around the stage. It was so
• 46:54
  Speaker 1: scary and it like made my eyes hurt to look at. Yeah,
• 46:59
  Speaker 1: it was so like However, that was edited. I don't
• 47:01
  Speaker 1: know if Michelle Peiffer was like, um, I'm not actually
• 47:04
  Speaker 1: going to do that. You have to like green screening.
• 47:08
  Speaker 1: But it like hurt my eyes to look at, and
• 47:10
  Speaker 1: it hurt my head to think about, like why are
• 47:12
  Speaker 1: they doing this? Why why, But it was also like
• 47:15
  Speaker 1: it just felt so because her thing was like I
• 47:18
  Speaker 1: need to be amazed. That was like her resolution. Her
• 47:21
  Speaker 1: list is fucking ridiculous. It's so basic. It's like such
• 47:26
  Speaker 1: basic white woman ship, and I'm just like, are you
• 47:30
  Speaker 1: It makes just that character is so and also I
• 47:33
  Speaker 1: feel like there is like some ages of met play
• 47:36
  Speaker 1: and the way that character is written, because they're like
• 47:38
  Speaker 1: like I feel like there is this whole element of like,
• 47:40
  Speaker 1: look at this, like you are supposed to think that
• 47:43
  Speaker 1: she's pathetic a little bit, oh yeah, but then we're like,
• 47:46
  Speaker 1: oh wait, Paul thinks she's cool, so I guess she's cool.
• 47:49
  Speaker 1: Like you're just like he validates her, and that whole
• 47:53
  Speaker 1: I mean, none of these stories makes sense. But she's
• 47:55
  Speaker 1: just like call she rents Paul for a day, which
• 47:58
  Speaker 1: is not how bike couriers work. Uh, you can't just
• 48:02
  Speaker 1: rent a bike courier for a day. But also he
• 48:06
  Speaker 1: is already doing the work of a mailman, so we
• 48:08
  Speaker 1: don't even know what's going on. He also has two bikes.
• 48:11
  Speaker 1: He has a regular bicycle and then he also has
• 48:13
  Speaker 1: like a moped scooter thing. This is why I'm very
• 48:16
  Speaker 1: glad I watched this movie twice because I'm like, Wow,
• 48:18
  Speaker 1: he seems to have a lot of money for someone
• 48:20
  Speaker 1: who says that he does not have any money, because
• 48:22
  Speaker 1: he has a gigantic apartment that he shares with Ashton Kutcher.
• 48:25
  Speaker 1: They live in like a loft or something, multiple bikes.
• 48:28
  Speaker 1: Like he's just like he's kind of like living. He's
• 48:32
  Speaker 1: he must be from money or something. Well, did you
• 48:35
  Speaker 1: notice this Whenever he goes into like the record company
• 48:38
  Speaker 1: to deliver the initial package to Michelle Peiffer, He's just
• 48:43
  Speaker 1: like seen going into their like kitchen and like other
• 48:47
  Speaker 1: spaces like rifling through stuff and stealing it. He steals
• 48:51
  Speaker 1: a bunch of CDs, and he like steals a bunch
• 48:52
  Speaker 1: of like coffee creamer and stuff. I don't know what
• 48:55
  Speaker 1: this guy's deal is at. I think we're supposed to
• 48:57
  Speaker 1: think he's like scrappy in his twenties and like doesn't
• 49:00
  Speaker 1: have a lot of money, but like that doesn't make sense.
• 49:04
  Speaker 1: And also it's like that's sort of like I don't know.
• 49:07
  Speaker 1: It seems like Gary Marshall wants you to believe like, oh,
• 49:10
  Speaker 1: New York gets magical and like, you know, Zachary, but
• 49:13
  Speaker 1: I don't understand how Paul has all these connections. They're like,
• 49:16
  Speaker 1: he's like, I'm a bike career, therefore I can rig
• 49:19
  Speaker 1: you up in the theater whenever I want. You're just like, no,
• 49:23
  Speaker 1: you can't. Or like when he goes he opened that
• 49:25
  Speaker 1: really jarring shot where he opens up a storage container
• 49:28
  Speaker 1: and there's a luxury spaw inside, and it was like
• 49:32
  Speaker 1: here here we are in Bali and you're like Meanwhile,
• 49:36
  Speaker 1: Michelle Pifer is like, she's like, ah, we're in Brooklyn,
• 49:41
  Speaker 1: the scariest neighborhood. I hate it here. It's so dangerous Brooklyn.
• 49:45
  Speaker 1: And it's just like shut that whole her list. It
• 49:51
  Speaker 1: was really funny too. I was like, wow, should we
• 49:53
  Speaker 1: try to pull that list off next year? One like
• 50:00
  Speaker 1: Save a Life? Like ridiculous, it's ludicrous, it's officer ludicrous,
• 50:07
  Speaker 1: it's Lieutenant Ludacris. Do you okay? So then we find
• 50:18
  Speaker 1: out that Hillary Swank is like planning to go meet
• 50:22
  Speaker 1: up with someone that night, and it's set up for
• 50:26
  Speaker 1: us to think that Hillary Swank and Josh Jumel are
• 50:29
  Speaker 1: like meeting up with each other, but then it's not,
• 50:33
  Speaker 1: because Hillary goes and meets up with her dad, Robert
• 50:37
  Speaker 1: de Niro and She takes him up to the roof
• 50:41
  Speaker 1: where he immediately dies. Where he dies, then the ball drops. Wow,
• 50:47
  Speaker 1: Happy New Year. Jessica Bale's in labor. Yes, the Gragnant
• 50:53
  Speaker 1: women are giving birth. Leah Michelle is singing old lang sign.
• 50:58
  Speaker 1: Zac Efron shows up and hisses Michelle's life for surprise
• 51:01
  Speaker 1: kisses her mind you launches himself at her. The god
• 51:07
  Speaker 1: some of the grossest no consent like surprise kisses in
• 51:10
  Speaker 1: the whole film canon here. I also think it's worth mentioning.
• 51:13
  Speaker 1: Ashton Kutcher shows up to be like good luckily and Michelle,
• 51:17
  Speaker 1: I'm your like loser boyfriend now the prize and she's
• 51:22
  Speaker 1: like okay, but he brings this thing that I only
• 51:24
  Speaker 1: recently learned about from a YouTube channel I watched. But like,
• 51:29
  Speaker 1: he brings her this really weird dated item that's like
• 51:32
  Speaker 1: a balanced bracelet that are like do you remember those
• 51:36
  Speaker 1: They They were a thing ten years ago. I didn't
• 51:38
  Speaker 1: know they existed. But he it looks like a live
• 51:40
  Speaker 1: strong band, but there's like a little piece of stone
• 51:44
  Speaker 1: in it and it's some It was some bullshit scam
• 51:47
  Speaker 1: that they did in the early two tents where they're like,
• 51:49
  Speaker 1: oh you balance better when you wear this thirty dollar
• 51:52
  Speaker 1: bracelet that's just plastic. I know he references that, but
• 51:55
  Speaker 1: I thought he was just making a joke where it's
• 51:58
  Speaker 1: like ha ha, if you don't have this cheap rubber bracelet,
• 52:01
  Speaker 1: it might offset your balance. I didn't realize that was
• 52:03
  Speaker 1: a real thing, like a balance brace. Tragically, that was
• 52:06
  Speaker 1: a real thing. Yeah, paging officer ludicrous, give what's going on? God?
• 52:17
  Speaker 1: And I mean they're obviously like funck the myp D.
• 52:20
  Speaker 1: But then at the end where the New York cops
• 52:22
  Speaker 1: just started kissing people, you're like, what the fuck is
• 52:26
  Speaker 1: going on? And it's happening. Well, here comes another surprise kiss.
• 52:31
  Speaker 1: Abigail Breslin goes and like finally finds her crush in
• 52:35
  Speaker 1: Times Square t Austin a Disney star or an Glodeon star. Yeah,
• 52:39
  Speaker 1: I have I have no idea who that was. He
• 52:41
  Speaker 1: was on Wizards of Waverley Place, okay um, But this
• 52:45
  Speaker 1: other girl grabs him in surprise, kisses him. And then
• 52:49
  Speaker 1: Abigail Breslin sees this and she gets sad. But then
• 52:51
  Speaker 1: the boys like, wait a minute, no, I got surprised
• 52:54
  Speaker 1: kiss you have it all wrong. I want to kiss you,
• 52:57
  Speaker 1: and then he surprised kisses Abigail Preslin. Just she's wearing
• 53:03
  Speaker 1: fingerless gloves for all of this. Oh I didn't even
• 53:06
  Speaker 1: notice that two thousand eleven she is wearing fingerless clubs.
• 53:10
  Speaker 1: Oh there's another just quick, this is uh. Seth Meyers
• 53:14
  Speaker 1: and Jessica Biel comment. But one of one of my
• 53:17
  Speaker 1: one of the most baffling line exchanges in the movie
• 53:19
  Speaker 1: for me was she's doing yoga to induce labor. She
• 53:24
  Speaker 1: just wants dollars even though they seem to have a
• 53:26
  Speaker 1: ton of money right to pay off. Seth Meyer's student
• 53:29
  Speaker 1: loaned it. Oh my gosh. So yes. So this is
• 53:32
  Speaker 1: the scene where you find out that he's a horse doctor.
• 53:36
  Speaker 1: He's he like walks and he's like, where are you
• 53:39
  Speaker 1: doing yoga? Like stop? And then she goes okay, and
• 53:43
  Speaker 1: then she she says, you are going to be a
• 53:46
  Speaker 1: great vet someday, Griff, and then he says thanks, and
• 53:49
  Speaker 1: then he makes a long joke about like, well, what
• 53:52
  Speaker 1: if I married a horse, that I would be married
• 53:53
  Speaker 1: to a horse, but I'm not. I'm married to you anyways,
• 53:56
  Speaker 1: why aren't you in labor? And I was like, what
• 53:58
  Speaker 1: the funk is going on? Here this is he's a
• 54:02
  Speaker 1: horse doctor. He used to pay off his horse doctor.
• 54:05
  Speaker 1: So in that storyline of the two gregnant women, we
• 54:08
  Speaker 1: learn what both of their husbands do for a living,
• 54:12
  Speaker 1: but we don't want anything about the two women and
• 54:16
  Speaker 1: the husband's jobs are ridiculous. It's a horse doctor and
• 54:20
  Speaker 1: charms school owner. Like there we we I'm trying to think.
• 54:25
  Speaker 1: I'm like, we know what Hillary Swank does, we know
• 54:28
  Speaker 1: what Katherine Heigel does. I would argue, we don't know
• 54:31
  Speaker 1: what Michelle Phiffer does. Michelle Phiffer doesn't even know what
• 54:34
  Speaker 1: she does. That's why she's full. I think she's the
• 54:36
  Speaker 1: assistant to John Lethgo. But it's so vague that it
• 54:39
  Speaker 1: really could be anything. We sort of know what Sarah
• 54:43
  Speaker 1: jess I almost said it again, Sarah Jessica Parker does,
• 54:47
  Speaker 1: because she's like a costume signer the Rockets Nic only
• 54:52
  Speaker 1: in New York. I guess we know what some of
• 54:54
  Speaker 1: the characters. It's just so like. But but yeah, it
• 54:57
  Speaker 1: seems pointed that you don't know what the two of
• 55:00
  Speaker 1: very pregnant people do for a living. It's almost as
• 55:02
  Speaker 1: if to say, like, well, they are mothers, so they
• 55:05
  Speaker 1: wouldn't have a career. Pregnancy is a full time job,
• 55:11
  Speaker 1: so weird, but yeah, he needs to pay off his
• 55:15
  Speaker 1: Also there's that Matthew Broderick cameo or first of all,
• 55:20
  Speaker 1: is that just like a deal that him and Sarah
• 55:23
  Speaker 1: Jessica Parker have, like you get both of us and
• 55:27
  Speaker 1: they're like, well, we don't want Matthew Broderick and he's like, well,
• 55:29
  Speaker 1: write me a scene anyways. Also his name is Mr Buellerton. Oh,
• 55:34
  Speaker 1: Ferris Buellerton's day off? Maybe what a what a mess?
• 55:39
  Speaker 1: What a mess? Um? Also pretty cool that Sarah Jessica
• 55:42
  Speaker 1: Parker is like, yeah, my husband needs to be in
• 55:44
  Speaker 1: the movie, but I'm not going to kiss him. I'm
• 55:46
  Speaker 1: going to kiss Josh. Yeah, okay, So that brings us
• 55:50
  Speaker 1: to Josh Dummel dumal whatever. Goes to the spot where
• 55:54
  Speaker 1: he was supposed to meet this like mystery woman who
• 55:56
  Speaker 1: he met last year. It seems like she's not going
• 55:58
  Speaker 1: to show up, but then she does and surprise it's
• 56:01
  Speaker 1: Sarah Jessica Parker and we're like, we're we supposed to
• 56:03
  Speaker 1: care about this at all? No hard to know um,
• 56:08
  Speaker 1: And then they kiss and we're like, whoa, I guess
• 56:11
  Speaker 1: that's the end of the movie. It's Josh Is it
• 56:13
  Speaker 1: joshd Mall's voice over at the end of the movie,
• 56:16
  Speaker 1: because at the end it was like I believe, So
• 56:18
  Speaker 1: that was confusing to me. I did not catch that
• 56:20
  Speaker 1: the first time. I was like, And then at the end,
• 56:21
  Speaker 1: someone just starts talking, I have no idea. I wasn't
• 56:24
  Speaker 1: sure if it was him or maybe de Niro's ghost. So,
• 56:32
  Speaker 1: oh my god. When when they literally I mean the
• 56:35
  Speaker 1: way that all these storylines and are so sloppy, but
• 56:38
  Speaker 1: when Hilary Swank leaves to go see if she's like,
• 56:42
  Speaker 1: by Ludacris, has been fun being in this movie with you,
• 56:44
  Speaker 1: and then he's like my little rugrats and You're like, stunt,
• 56:49
  Speaker 1: don't weird? Weird? Maybe they are. Then I was like,
• 56:54
  Speaker 1: what if those are his actual kids and they did
• 56:55
  Speaker 1: one of those things. It's it wasn't yeah, yeah, yeah,
• 56:58
  Speaker 1: who knows um, But I think that's the end of
• 57:00
  Speaker 1: the movie. Then there's like this credit montage of mostly
• 57:03
  Speaker 1: Zach Effron dancing, and then there's also bloopers, but then
• 57:06
  Speaker 1: that's it. Did you find it really jarring in the
• 57:09
  Speaker 1: credits where okay, it looked like the credits were like
• 57:13
  Speaker 1: they put all the names of all the main actors,
• 57:15
  Speaker 1: but they didn't put any of the names over the
• 57:17
  Speaker 1: actor that they were talking. So it was I was
• 57:21
  Speaker 1: like dying. It kept cutting like they credit like it
• 57:24
  Speaker 1: was shots of zac Effron when they for ludicrous, it
• 57:28
  Speaker 1: was shots of zac Efron. When they were crediting Liam Michelle.
• 57:31
  Speaker 1: It was a shot of zac Efron. When they were
• 57:33
  Speaker 1: crediting Jon bon Jovi, Like they put Michelle Peiffer over
• 57:37
  Speaker 1: Sarah Jessica Parker. It was like it made that's like
• 57:40
  Speaker 1: editing one oh one, and they fucked up cotting back
• 57:43
  Speaker 1: to Zach Effron for everyone except for zac Efron, and
• 57:47
  Speaker 1: that was John bon Jovi, Like this is so weird.
• 57:51
  Speaker 1: Oh my god. Well that's the story. Let's take a
• 57:55
  Speaker 1: quick break and we'll come back to discuss, and we're
• 58:05
  Speaker 1: back back. I just wanted to shout out the blooper
• 58:08
  Speaker 1: real one more time. Did you have a favorite blooper um?
• 58:13
  Speaker 1: I mean, just because I love zach Efron so much,
• 58:18
  Speaker 1: I was like very endeared by I think he has
• 58:21
  Speaker 1: one or two little bloopers that gets snuck in there.
• 58:24
  Speaker 1: He seems like he was really hamming it up. He
• 58:27
  Speaker 1: really was oh he has, Yeah, he has one where
• 58:29
  Speaker 1: he calls Michelle Schifer the wrong character name. Uh, and
• 58:34
  Speaker 1: then he likes. And then there's another one where he likes.
• 58:36
  Speaker 1: He's like talking into the phone to Ashton Kutcher and
• 58:39
  Speaker 1: then he like does his line wrong and then he
• 58:41
  Speaker 1: has to like kind of swivels around. He's like, oh shoot,
• 58:45
  Speaker 1: So I liked those just because I love zac Efron.
• 58:48
  Speaker 1: My favorite one was when Hallie Berry the Hallie Berry
• 58:53
  Speaker 1: carry they're they're McGregor, so they're like they're walking down
• 58:59
  Speaker 1: the hallway and Hallie Berry is saying he needs to
• 59:03
  Speaker 1: be taken to hospice care, but she can't stop laughing. Uh,
• 59:08
  Speaker 1: maybe made sense if you were. It seems like you
• 59:11
  Speaker 1: had to be there, because it doesn't make sense to
• 59:14
  Speaker 1: me why she's like, he has to go to hospice
• 59:17
  Speaker 1: Like he's like, halle Berry read the room, Yeah you almost,
• 59:22
  Speaker 1: and he's dying right. They should have included the context
• 59:26
  Speaker 1: store for why she was laughing, but they don't, and
• 59:28
  Speaker 1: then it just seems really insensitive, makes her seem really mean,
• 59:32
  Speaker 1: like very strange. And and then of course Jessica Biel
• 59:36
  Speaker 1: gives birth to a deep a widescreen DVD and a
• 59:39
  Speaker 1: blue ray of Valentine's Day because this all takes place
• 59:42
  Speaker 1: in the same expanded universe. Hilarious. I also wanted to
• 59:47
  Speaker 1: shout out some of the cameo performances that we haven't
• 59:49
  Speaker 1: already shouted out, such as Milana. I never ended up
• 59:54
  Speaker 1: finding her. I was confused by the two, and I
• 59:56
  Speaker 1: think it's partly because I don't really know what Alssa
• 59:58
  Speaker 1: Milana looks like and I liked the same I'm suffering
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 1: from the same thing. But she was one of the
• 1:00:05
  Speaker 1: nurses in Robert de Niro almost called him Robert Downey Jr.
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 1: God Trunk of Shadows. She's a nurse in Robert DeNiro's story.
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 1: There's also um is it Yard Lee Smith? Rd Lee Smith? Oh?
• 1:00:23
  Speaker 1: Wait Bart Simpson? Yes? Where is where is Bart? Or?
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 1: Sorry Lisa Simpson. She's in the r V that Josh
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 1: Dummel is in. Uh see why I fast forward at
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 1: the Josh Dumel scenes for self care, so I don't know.
• 1:00:39
  Speaker 1: She plays a very kind of trophy character where she's
• 1:00:42
  Speaker 1: just like in love with the idea of love and
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 1: she's just like, oh my gosh, tell me about this
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 1: love story between you and this woman. I love love
• 1:00:52
  Speaker 1: it sounds like season two of you. Um. There's also
• 1:00:57
  Speaker 1: Nat Wolf from The Naked Brothers Band is credit it
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 1: as waiter, which makes no sense to me because he
• 1:01:02
  Speaker 1: would have been like sixteen, so that he plays I
• 1:01:05
  Speaker 1: guess he plays a waiter. I don't know who that is,
• 1:01:07
  Speaker 1: so I can't say that's okay. Carlage God, I don't
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 1: think I have ever tried to say her last name
• 1:01:15
  Speaker 1: out loud since the Spy Kids episode. But Carla Gugino, Yeah, yeah, yeah,
• 1:01:20
  Speaker 1: a mom from Spy Kids, iconically, amongst other roles, is
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 1: in it briefly. Briefly, she plays like a hippie doctor
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 1: almost she's like an m D. But she also like
• 1:01:32
  Speaker 1: does all this kind of holistic medicine approach. She's the
• 1:01:36
  Speaker 1: one who pulls the DVDs out of Jessica Bale's vagina.
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 1: Hilarious joke. We all love it. Um. There's also Penny
• 1:01:43
  Speaker 1: Marshall is at the like record company party, and we
• 1:01:48
  Speaker 1: see her being very mean to a service industry person.
• 1:01:51
  Speaker 1: So that's cool. Um, let's see. Oh, Jim Belushi plays
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 1: the superintendent of the building with the broken l e Vader. Yeah,
• 1:02:01
  Speaker 1: and you can just tell like that whole thing that
• 1:02:04
  Speaker 1: had to be just a whole day of Ashton Kutcher
• 1:02:07
  Speaker 1: kissing Jim Belushi's ass in a really like in a
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 1: way that must have been really embarrassing to watch, where
• 1:02:12
  Speaker 1: he's like, oh my god, I love your work so much,
• 1:02:15
  Speaker 1: so influential to me, and you're just like Ashton Kutcher,
• 1:02:18
  Speaker 1: shut the funk up, challenge, calm down. Yeah, there's probably
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 1: some other people I'm forgetting about, but those those are
• 1:02:25
  Speaker 1: all the famous people, and of course Mayor Michael Bloomer
• 1:02:29
  Speaker 1: and Mike Bloomberg as himself. Disaster. You hate to see it?
• 1:02:34
  Speaker 1: You do? Okay, where should we start? Well? I feel
• 1:02:39
  Speaker 1: like the one of the more egregious elements of this
• 1:02:44
  Speaker 1: movie and movies of this genre, are how they treat
• 1:02:48
  Speaker 1: non white characters. Only white characters get meaningful love arcs
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 1: in this movie. I would say meaningful storylines at all.
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 1: I mean, I guess so, but it's like, are any
• 1:03:01
  Speaker 1: of these stories meaningful? I don't know, Like I guess
• 1:03:04
  Speaker 1: complete storyline. It's like, um, because we have a few
• 1:03:08
  Speaker 1: people of color in this movie, but they're all in
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 1: supporting roles, mostly to support a rich white lady in
• 1:03:16
  Speaker 1: dating someone or uh, well, I guess so. So Russell
• 1:03:21
  Speaker 1: Peters and Sophia Rigara work with Katherine Heigel and they
• 1:03:25
  Speaker 1: only exist to see what's going on with her and
• 1:03:29
  Speaker 1: John bon Jensen. They don't get any meaningful storyline out
• 1:03:34
  Speaker 1: of that. And then there's also Luda, Officer Luda, who
• 1:03:40
  Speaker 1: is a friend of Hilary Swank and then is like, okay,
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 1: like he doesn't need to be there. It's just weird
• 1:03:48
  Speaker 1: that he's there at all, Like he I think we
• 1:03:51
  Speaker 1: said this earlier, Like he could be written out of
• 1:03:53
  Speaker 1: every scene and the movie would be kind of no different.
• 1:03:56
  Speaker 1: He could also be a ghost in the movie would
• 1:03:58
  Speaker 1: be no different. So that's not good writing for one
• 1:04:01
  Speaker 1: of your only black actors in the movie. And then
• 1:04:03
  Speaker 1: there's halle Berry in Common where halle Berry's story compared
• 1:04:07
  Speaker 1: to all of like the white couples, is so depressing,
• 1:04:11
  Speaker 1: like she doesn't get to go anywhere, she doesn't get
• 1:04:13
  Speaker 1: to do anything. She has to just like listen to
• 1:04:16
  Speaker 1: Robert de Niro'll be like, I've made so many vague mistakes.
• 1:04:19
  Speaker 1: And then well, that's the thing. I wouldn't classify her
• 1:04:23
  Speaker 1: storyline as being about her. She isn't in another supporting
• 1:04:29
  Speaker 1: role supporting a white character, and then they do try
• 1:04:32
  Speaker 1: to characterize her a little bit more, right, but that
• 1:04:35
  Speaker 1: scene is like a minute, maybe it's an after I
• 1:04:38
  Speaker 1: think it's like fully an afterthought, totally an afterthought. And
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 1: the thing that they do to like try to characterize
• 1:04:44
  Speaker 1: her further is just like introduce her in the context
• 1:04:48
  Speaker 1: of like the romantic hetero relationship that she's in. So
• 1:04:51
  Speaker 1: it's like, Okay, this isn't interesting or I mean, it
• 1:04:56
  Speaker 1: could be interesting, but like nothing about it had been
• 1:04:58
  Speaker 1: set up or really developed, and it just feels like
• 1:05:01
  Speaker 1: very random and tacked on. Like I think what's what
• 1:05:06
  Speaker 1: is more interesting about halle Berry's character is that she
• 1:05:09
  Speaker 1: is like does not care about medical misconduct. That's pretty interesting.
• 1:05:15
  Speaker 1: She's like kill Robert de Niro, cef I care, Like
• 1:05:18
  Speaker 1: that's a better movie, that's a better plot. Like but yeah,
• 1:05:21
  Speaker 1: it's like even they give her a partner at the
• 1:05:24
  Speaker 1: last second for no ostensible reason. But even so, it's
• 1:05:29
  Speaker 1: like you just see like a white couple mashing their
• 1:05:32
  Speaker 1: face together in Times Square, white couple mashing their face
• 1:05:34
  Speaker 1: together in Times Square, and then halle Berry has to
• 1:05:38
  Speaker 1: hang out with Robert de Niro calling himself an asshole
• 1:05:41
  Speaker 1: for two hours and then at the end they're like
• 1:05:44
  Speaker 1: and halle Berry has a husband who's serving overseas and
• 1:05:48
  Speaker 1: she's sad and you're like, fuck you, Like come on.
• 1:05:52
  Speaker 1: They also make her like get changed in like a
• 1:05:54
  Speaker 1: fucking broom closet, and then she has to like to
• 1:05:58
  Speaker 1: zoom to zoom in another room in the hospital, like
• 1:06:02
  Speaker 1: why doesn't she go home, like when we see where
• 1:06:06
  Speaker 1: she lives. Like so it's it's like just everything you
• 1:06:12
  Speaker 1: think it would be in terms of how this movie
• 1:06:15
  Speaker 1: writes and treats their non white characters. It's aggressively says
• 1:06:22
  Speaker 1: head or oh yeah. There's also with the two characters
• 1:06:26
  Speaker 1: who are like in the Employe of Katherine Heigel, we
• 1:06:30
  Speaker 1: have Sophia Regara who plays a character that she often plays,
• 1:06:34
  Speaker 1: which is a non native speaker of English. Therefore she
• 1:06:38
  Speaker 1: gets some like words and phrases wrong, and that's always
• 1:06:41
  Speaker 1: played as a joke. I mean, that's like the story
• 1:06:44
  Speaker 1: of modern family, isn't it. I don't know, that is
• 1:06:47
  Speaker 1: very In fact, I was like she just playing that
• 1:06:49
  Speaker 1: same character because it's the exact same thing. A lot
• 1:06:54
  Speaker 1: of jokes are made at the expense of her not
• 1:06:57
  Speaker 1: having the most fluent grasp of ish kind of thing.
• 1:07:01
  Speaker 1: And she's also like oversexualized in a way that she
• 1:07:04
  Speaker 1: very often is so well, which happens very frequently, Like
• 1:07:10
  Speaker 1: it's just it's it's really frustrating, Like she a lot
• 1:07:13
  Speaker 1: is made of her body, which is the same deal
• 1:07:16
  Speaker 1: and modern family, and she's just very like dit see
• 1:07:19
  Speaker 1: and oversexualized in a way that isn't just sexist. Is
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 1: also like I mean, we've talked about this in past
• 1:07:26
  Speaker 1: episodes before our our conversation in a Laddin kind of
• 1:07:29
  Speaker 1: comes to mind of how black and brown women are
• 1:07:32
  Speaker 1: so often oversexualized because tropes, and that is like kind
• 1:07:39
  Speaker 1: of no exception in in this movie for Sophia Vergara. Yes,
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 1: and then the other character who works for Katherine Hugel
• 1:07:48
  Speaker 1: is Russell Peters is character, and he is made to
• 1:07:53
  Speaker 1: do an accent which he does not have in real life. Nope,
• 1:07:56
  Speaker 1: he is Canadian, He's Canadian. He has a Canadian accent. Um.
• 1:08:00
  Speaker 1: This is something that a lot of South Asian actors
• 1:08:03
  Speaker 1: in particular have to deal with Asian actors in general,
• 1:08:06
  Speaker 1: where they are made to do an accent that they
• 1:08:10
  Speaker 1: do not actually have. Usually for like comedic effect, and
• 1:08:15
  Speaker 1: it's almost always racist. We just we we had our
• 1:08:18
  Speaker 1: conversation about this on the Matren recently with the character
• 1:08:22
  Speaker 1: I don't remember the name of the character heal from
• 1:08:25
  Speaker 1: Princess Christmas Prince too, and this has been written about extensively.
• 1:08:33
  Speaker 1: It's like a I don't know how much that conversation
• 1:08:37
  Speaker 1: was being had in a public way in late eleven,
• 1:08:40
  Speaker 1: but at this point, I mean, it's so so so
• 1:08:43
  Speaker 1: agreed to us and absolutely not on the actor at all,
• 1:08:47
  Speaker 1: because so many parts are written to these very racist stereotypes,
• 1:08:52
  Speaker 1: and then the actor only gets so many offers for
• 1:08:56
  Speaker 1: so many types of parts. Like it's just such an
• 1:08:59
  Speaker 1: infuriateing cycle. Yes, Kalpen had a really insightful and frustrating
• 1:09:07
  Speaker 1: Twitter threat about that that we will link in the
• 1:09:10
  Speaker 1: description about the types of characters that he's been sent.
• 1:09:14
  Speaker 1: And this seems like this character, Wait, what is Russell
• 1:09:18
  Speaker 1: Peter's character even called in this movie, Sue neil Um,
• 1:09:22
  Speaker 1: This character seems very in the South Asian stereotypes that
• 1:09:28
  Speaker 1: like actors of South Asian descent who do not have
• 1:09:30
  Speaker 1: accedence are constantly asked to play. Yeah. I would also
• 1:09:34
  Speaker 1: recommend the documentary The problem with a Pooh. The hot
• 1:09:38
  Speaker 1: comedian Hari Condobolu made which dives into this quite a bit.
• 1:09:44
  Speaker 1: So it's on HBO Max for anyone who wants to
• 1:09:48
  Speaker 1: watch it. Very insightful. Um. Yeah, So in general, like
• 1:09:52
  Speaker 1: we can just basically sum up this movie as being
• 1:09:55
  Speaker 1: like obscenely white. The only main storylines are given to
• 1:09:59
  Speaker 1: white people. The only people of color are there to
• 1:10:02
  Speaker 1: support the white characters who have more significant narrative arcs.
• 1:10:06
  Speaker 1: Just like a very a lot of negative stereotypes right
• 1:10:10
  Speaker 1: play with Um. I feel like Sophia Rigara and Russell
• 1:10:15
  Speaker 1: Peters in particular, although it doesn't help that Officer Luda
• 1:10:21
  Speaker 1: is with the ny p D, I don't love that.
• 1:10:24
  Speaker 1: I also the shot I truly shocking at the end
• 1:10:29
  Speaker 1: where New York cops are just making out with random people.
• 1:10:33
  Speaker 1: I hated to see it. Well, let's talk about the
• 1:10:38
  Speaker 1: sexual misconduct that takes place with any storylines. So there
• 1:10:43
  Speaker 1: are many examples across many different storylines of characters harassing
• 1:10:48
  Speaker 1: other characters. Or for example, Zac Efron, the moment he
• 1:10:53
  Speaker 1: is introduced on screen street harasses like six different women. Yeah,
• 1:10:58
  Speaker 1: within the first ten seconds of seeing his character Russell
• 1:11:02
  Speaker 1: Peters to Sofia Regara, which plays into the over sexualization
• 1:11:06
  Speaker 1: of her character. Um, he's like taking photos of her.
• 1:11:09
  Speaker 1: She's kind of very excitedly jumping up and down, and
• 1:11:12
  Speaker 1: he says, keep jumping. You're very sexy. Bouncy, bouncy, bouncy.
• 1:11:17
  Speaker 1: Katherine Heigel also later sexualizes her again. Katherine Heigel is
• 1:11:22
  Speaker 1: Sophia regards boss in this movie, so like to her subordinate.
• 1:11:26
  Speaker 1: She's like commenting on the size of her breasts in
• 1:11:29
  Speaker 1: a really inappropriate way. Russell Peters also proceeds to make
• 1:11:33
  Speaker 1: several inappropriate comments to various women throughout the movie about
• 1:11:37
  Speaker 1: like who they're going to kiss at midnight and other
• 1:11:40
  Speaker 1: sexually suggestive things. We already talked about the whatever choice
• 1:11:45
  Speaker 1: if I don't if this was in the script, or
• 1:11:46
  Speaker 1: if this is something Gary Marshall decided should happen, or
• 1:11:49
  Speaker 1: what exactly, But a choice was made for Abigail Breslin,
• 1:11:53
  Speaker 1: who was a teenager she's fifteen child for her to
• 1:11:58
  Speaker 1: lift up her shirt and flash her bra in a
• 1:12:02
  Speaker 1: crowded public space for some reason. That's in the movie
• 1:12:06
  Speaker 1: not just gross but also nonsense, as absolutely nonsense. Um,
• 1:12:12
  Speaker 1: Jim Belushi is like, hey, Ashton Kutcher, you totally fucked
• 1:12:16
  Speaker 1: Lea Michelle and the elevator right right, right right, Like
• 1:12:20
  Speaker 1: that scene goes on for so long of Jim Belushi
• 1:12:24
  Speaker 1: being like, you had sex with that hot lady wink
• 1:12:28
  Speaker 1: wink right and you're like please, and it's like, is
• 1:12:32
  Speaker 1: this I'm sorry screenwriter, Catherine, what's her day? Few game,
• 1:12:38
  Speaker 1: few games? Something? Is this your idea of comedy? Which
• 1:12:43
  Speaker 1: goes to show that even women can be terrible sexist screenwriters.
• 1:12:51
  Speaker 1: She also wrote Valentine's Days, so the End of Yours
• 1:12:54
  Speaker 1: Eve is the last like major movie that she has written,
• 1:12:57
  Speaker 1: so you know, yipe swell, good riddance. And then there's
• 1:13:02
  Speaker 1: also and we touched on some of these already, but
• 1:13:04
  Speaker 1: there's also a number of surprise kisses where Ashton there's
• 1:13:10
  Speaker 1: constantly They're constantly happening, Uh, Ashton Kutcher, surprise kisses Leah, Michelle,
• 1:13:14
  Speaker 1: zach Efron's surprise kisses Michelle Pfeiffer. There's the several surprise
• 1:13:19
  Speaker 1: kisses in the Abigail Breslin storyline. There's extras, surprise kissing,
• 1:13:24
  Speaker 1: other extras. It's just constantly happening. It's so and it
• 1:13:30
  Speaker 1: is also in addition, to this movie being horrendously racist.
• 1:13:35
  Speaker 1: It is also the most hetero movie I've ever seen,
• 1:13:38
  Speaker 1: just frustrating because they have I mean, it's like there,
• 1:13:41
  Speaker 1: I don't know, I'm like why. It's like, you have,
• 1:13:44
  Speaker 1: first of all, two queer icons in this movie, and
• 1:13:48
  Speaker 1: it's like, come on, Sarah Paulson, why do I have
• 1:13:51
  Speaker 1: to like anyways? But who's the other one, Cherry Jones?
• 1:13:56
  Speaker 1: Oh wait, who's Jerry I don't know who Jerry Jones is.
• 1:13:58
  Speaker 1: Sherry Jones is the owner of the record label, and
• 1:14:03
  Speaker 1: she and Sarah Paulson used to date, but by the
• 1:14:05
  Speaker 1: movie time this movie is shot, they're not dating. So
• 1:14:07
  Speaker 1: you're like famining drama. They're not. They don't appear in
• 1:14:12
  Speaker 1: a scene together, much like Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew
• 1:14:16
  Speaker 1: Broderick even though they are married. I don't know, shrug um,
• 1:14:21
  Speaker 1: but yeah, there are there are several Several of the
• 1:14:23
  Speaker 1: stories revolve around a romance of some kind between Katherine
• 1:14:28
  Speaker 1: Heigel and bon Jovi, Ashton Kutcher and Liam Michelle, Abigail
• 1:14:31
  Speaker 1: Breslin and her crush Seth, Sarah Jessica Parker and Josh Jumal.
• 1:14:35
  Speaker 1: They're all only Hilary Swank, who doesn't have a romantic storyline. Yeah,
• 1:14:42
  Speaker 1: kind of, it's like Hilary Swank and then Ludacris is
• 1:14:44
  Speaker 1: already married. Yeah, you find out Halle Berry has been
• 1:14:47
  Speaker 1: married the whole time at the end, common the two
• 1:14:50
  Speaker 1: pregnant women in hetero relationships. As everyone is, this is
• 1:14:54
  Speaker 1: a New York City where only straight people live and
• 1:14:59
  Speaker 1: mostly white people live, and we all love cops and
• 1:15:03
  Speaker 1: we need to have a baby yesterday. Like it's messy. Um. Yeah,
• 1:15:10
  Speaker 1: I think that they're we we've sort of touched on this,
• 1:15:12
  Speaker 1: but I think that there's definitely some ages them at
• 1:15:13
  Speaker 1: play with how Michelle Peiffer's characters treated. I didn't like that.
• 1:15:18
  Speaker 1: I'm all for like, you know, like I I always
• 1:15:22
  Speaker 1: think it's like a cool representation when there's an age
• 1:15:26
  Speaker 1: relationship and the woman is the older party that I
• 1:15:29
  Speaker 1: feel like a lot of them. But this is not
• 1:15:32
  Speaker 1: the storyline that you're like, cool there it is, Uh,
• 1:15:37
  Speaker 1: that's not this is not it because these two characters
• 1:15:42
  Speaker 1: make no sense together. It doesn't like the huh what
• 1:15:46
  Speaker 1: are they going to do? Like it doesn't make any sense.
• 1:15:49
  Speaker 1: But I guess they're in love and so that's amazing
• 1:15:55
  Speaker 1: Seth Meyers as a horse doctor. Um what else? What
• 1:15:59
  Speaker 1: else is going on here? Yeah? It is kind of
• 1:16:02
  Speaker 1: like it is. It was jarring to go down the
• 1:16:05
  Speaker 1: list of main actors and and realize how many have
• 1:16:08
  Speaker 1: been canceled rightfully so since since this movie was released. Um. Oh.
• 1:16:14
  Speaker 1: And then there's just like the good old fashioned sexism
• 1:16:17
  Speaker 1: in the movie. There's, for example, um, when Sophia Frigara
• 1:16:22
  Speaker 1: tells John bond Jensen, Uh, that's what women like. We
• 1:16:26
  Speaker 1: like to talk. Um some some classic, some classics out there.
• 1:16:31
  Speaker 1: There's John bon Jensen's being baffled that Katherine Heigel wouldn't
• 1:16:35
  Speaker 1: just give up her career to go on the road
• 1:16:37
  Speaker 1: with him, and he's like, why won't you do? What's
• 1:16:40
  Speaker 1: the big deal? Like women's careers are less valuable? Yea,
• 1:16:45
  Speaker 1: at the very least she challenged. I was like, wow,
• 1:16:48
  Speaker 1: I'm surprised this movie even had her challenge that, because
• 1:16:51
  Speaker 1: she says something akin to like, I have my own life,
• 1:16:55
  Speaker 1: I have my own career. I'm not going to drop
• 1:16:57
  Speaker 1: it for you again. I'm going to focus on my
• 1:17:01
  Speaker 1: own stuff and I love my career. And then because
• 1:17:04
  Speaker 1: of that, he decides to cancel his tour, so I'm like, okay,
• 1:17:08
  Speaker 1: I didn't expect for any of that to happen. That's like,
• 1:17:10
  Speaker 1: which leads to one of the worst setups of the
• 1:17:13
  Speaker 1: entire movie. Oh God, like where they're kissing, they're kiss
• 1:17:18
  Speaker 1: kiss kissing in Times Square. Well, apparently John bon Jensen
• 1:17:23
  Speaker 1: is supposed to be performing at midnight in Times Square
• 1:17:28
  Speaker 1: and then she can Higgels like, wait, if you're not performing,
• 1:17:32
  Speaker 1: then who is? And he's like, oh yeah, I forgot
• 1:17:36
  Speaker 1: to perform at midnight in Times Square on New Year's Eve.
• 1:17:39
  Speaker 1: And then Lea Michelle asked to come in and do
• 1:17:42
  Speaker 1: do her a little thing Stan Lea Michelle so annoying.
• 1:17:48
  Speaker 1: There's another really troubling thing about the Katherine Heigel Jensen
• 1:17:53
  Speaker 1: bon Jovi storyline to me, and it is that you
• 1:17:58
  Speaker 1: find out towards the end bon Jovie basically demanded that
• 1:18:02
  Speaker 1: she get hired to cater this party. Yeah, which first
• 1:18:06
  Speaker 1: of all, talk about like giving a woman imposter syndrome
• 1:18:10
  Speaker 1: because she's she thought she got hired based on her
• 1:18:13
  Speaker 1: merit and instead she got hired because bon Jovi threatened
• 1:18:18
  Speaker 1: to not do the performance unless she catered the after party.
• 1:18:22
  Speaker 1: That's so fucked up. He tries to save it by
• 1:18:24
  Speaker 1: being like, I know you would have had a lot
• 1:18:26
  Speaker 1: of offers, but I just you're like. And then the
• 1:18:31
  Speaker 1: other very troubling thing about this is that she was
• 1:18:34
  Speaker 1: actively trying to avoid him after he betrayed her, Yes,
• 1:18:39
  Speaker 1: and he puts her in a situation where she is
• 1:18:43
  Speaker 1: forced to be near him and come in contact with him,
• 1:18:46
  Speaker 1: which is not dissimilar from stalking. And I totally agree
• 1:18:52
  Speaker 1: he's treated as so cute for doing all of this too,
• 1:18:56
  Speaker 1: like we're supposed we as an audiensor trained to be like,
• 1:18:58
  Speaker 1: oh my god. I love how he keeps showing up.
• 1:19:00
  Speaker 1: I love how he keeps, you know, like putting her
• 1:19:03
  Speaker 1: like finances to revolve around this person that she doesn't
• 1:19:06
  Speaker 1: want to be around for a very good reason. Uh.
• 1:19:09
  Speaker 1: The and then that scene we're sitting on the hood
• 1:19:12
  Speaker 1: of the car and he talks to Hillary Swank and
• 1:19:15
  Speaker 1: he's like, oh, I'm so he's acting like he's twenty
• 1:19:18
  Speaker 1: years old. He's girl, boy, screws it up. It's like, sir,
• 1:19:23
  Speaker 1: you are fifty years old. You need to grow up,
• 1:19:26
  Speaker 1: like and then Hillary Swank says you rock yeah, And
• 1:19:29
  Speaker 1: then you got oh but yeah, sure, yeah, like you said,
• 1:19:34
  Speaker 1: audiences have been trained to think that what he did
• 1:19:36
  Speaker 1: was romantic and not very troubling. And that's also how
• 1:19:40
  Speaker 1: Catherine Heigel reacts. She's like, Wow, you did that for me.
• 1:19:43
  Speaker 1: You stalked me and gave me imposter syndrome. That's so romantic.
• 1:19:48
  Speaker 1: I can't believe a famous guy made time should harass
• 1:19:51
  Speaker 1: me all year, And that's exactly what he does. He
• 1:19:53
  Speaker 1: basically just wears her down throughout the whole movie. Yeah,
• 1:19:56
  Speaker 1: he keeps just walking into a kitchen. It made me
• 1:19:59
  Speaker 1: really stress out. I was like, put on a mask,
• 1:20:01
  Speaker 1: put on some gloves, like what are you doing? Get
• 1:20:03
  Speaker 1: away from the food. You're dirty. Um. As much as
• 1:20:08
  Speaker 1: I detest Ashton Kutcher, Leah Michelle, that whole thing that
• 1:20:13
  Speaker 1: there's a lot of sexism at played there is well,
• 1:20:16
  Speaker 1: he is like Mr. Nagging over and over like he
• 1:20:20
  Speaker 1: for a groupie, and then only to reveal that he
• 1:20:24
  Speaker 1: like is like a freelance like graphic designer who sucks
• 1:20:29
  Speaker 1: at drawing that fucking thing they laser jetted off and
• 1:20:32
  Speaker 1: Kucher is like, look at my art. You're like yeah, yeah, right,
• 1:20:37
  Speaker 1: and then she says it's bad. But his whole thing
• 1:20:39
  Speaker 1: is like he is just nagging her and then she
• 1:20:44
  Speaker 1: starts to fall in love with him. I don't, It's
• 1:20:49
  Speaker 1: just like garbage nonsense. They're like, we only have seven
• 1:20:54
  Speaker 1: minutes to do this entire arc, and it's just and
• 1:20:58
  Speaker 1: like two minutes of it are bent nagging Leah Michelle's character. Um,
• 1:21:04
  Speaker 1: I mean she negs him back. So I guess there's
• 1:21:07
  Speaker 1: that also not how not a good basis for a relationship.
• 1:21:13
  Speaker 1: I didn't know for that that like the Boushemy test,
• 1:21:16
  Speaker 1: if you apply the Bush test to that, that relationship
• 1:21:20
  Speaker 1: in particular of just like if Steve bouch if you're
• 1:21:23
  Speaker 1: sitting in an elevator with Steve Bushey being like, what
• 1:21:25
  Speaker 1: are you some kind of groupie? Oh so do you
• 1:21:28
  Speaker 1: want to kiss me? Or what? Like? It just does
• 1:21:30
  Speaker 1: not It does not play, It does not work, and
• 1:21:36
  Speaker 1: it's bad. Um, how about how about this? Abigail Breslin
• 1:21:42
  Speaker 1: says to her mom, Sarah Jessica Parker, quote, you're clingy
• 1:21:47
  Speaker 1: and mean, and it's because you don't have a man
• 1:21:50
  Speaker 1: in your life. And then Sarah Jessica Parker, rather than
• 1:21:54
  Speaker 1: responding meaningfully to this or challenging this at all, she
• 1:21:58
  Speaker 1: nods in agree meant She's like, it is that she
• 1:22:04
  Speaker 1: got me. That's why I'm trying to prevent you from
• 1:22:07
  Speaker 1: going to Times Square of really dangerous area on a
• 1:22:10
  Speaker 1: really dangerous day as a minor, because I need to
• 1:22:14
  Speaker 1: date Josh d mel really bad. Um. Also, we didn't
• 1:22:19
  Speaker 1: mention this. Her brother, Sarah Jessica Parker's brother is Zach Efron.
• 1:22:26
  Speaker 1: That does that ever become relevant? No? It does not.
• 1:22:31
  Speaker 1: Do they ever even appear in the same shot. I
• 1:22:33
  Speaker 1: don't think that they do. Know they talk on the phone,
• 1:22:35
  Speaker 1: They've never met. And Okay, I know that age gaps
• 1:22:39
  Speaker 1: between siblings is a thing. I know that it happens.
• 1:22:43
  Speaker 1: I didn't even thought about that. Sarah Jessica Parker is
• 1:22:45
  Speaker 1: twenty two years older than Zac Efron. It's not impossible
• 1:22:50
  Speaker 1: that they would be siblings. Maybe they're steps of I
• 1:22:52
  Speaker 1: did find it to be sort of a weird choice though.
• 1:22:55
  Speaker 1: Maybe there're steps of I don't know, could be half siblings.
• 1:22:59
  Speaker 1: Maybe maybe they didn't even know who was going to
• 1:23:02
  Speaker 1: end up, Like it's so much of this movie must
• 1:23:05
  Speaker 1: have come together in in editing, Like who God, I
• 1:23:09
  Speaker 1: didn't even think of that. Also, what a meaningless thing
• 1:23:13
  Speaker 1: to do like that never comes back because he's like,
• 1:23:17
  Speaker 1: He's like, well, maybe like if my niece calls me
• 1:23:20
  Speaker 1: and says like her cool uncle, like, but then that
• 1:23:23
  Speaker 1: never happens, so well he does. I think what happened
• 1:23:27
  Speaker 1: there is that Abigail Breslin did call him off screen
• 1:23:30
  Speaker 1: and for some reason told him where she would be,
• 1:23:33
  Speaker 1: and that then he relays that information to Sarah Jessica Parker.
• 1:23:37
  Speaker 1: But like she could have just like she found out
• 1:23:42
  Speaker 1: another way where her daughter was, you know, she couldn't.
• 1:23:46
  Speaker 1: She could have texted Piper's mom, who is another very
• 1:23:49
  Speaker 1: trophy like woman character of the overbearing Muther. She could
• 1:23:54
  Speaker 1: have just texted Piper's mom and been like where are
• 1:23:57
  Speaker 1: our kids, and Pipers along to be like they're right
• 1:24:00
  Speaker 1: here because I'm stalking them. Also, the just how that
• 1:24:04
  Speaker 1: um Abigail Breslin and her crushed Seth, how that plays
• 1:24:09
  Speaker 1: out towards the end like we already went over like
• 1:24:11
  Speaker 1: the surprise kissiness of it all, but the way that
• 1:24:14
  Speaker 1: they have that, even the way that Seth question talks
• 1:24:20
  Speaker 1: to her is really weird. Where she is mad at
• 1:24:23
  Speaker 1: him because he got surprise kissed, which is not his fault,
• 1:24:27
  Speaker 1: but this movie says it is his fault, and he says,
• 1:24:30
  Speaker 1: she grabbed me and she totally stole it from me,
• 1:24:34
  Speaker 1: and then she's like, I don't believe you, and then
• 1:24:36
  Speaker 1: he surprised kisses her. I just wanted to go through
• 1:24:40
  Speaker 1: that dialogue because I'm like, the dialogue does somehow make
• 1:24:43
  Speaker 1: a bad situation worse because it's just But the line
• 1:24:47
  Speaker 1: I did like from him that was so clear, I'm like, oh,
• 1:24:50
  Speaker 1: I a grown person wrote this, A grown person who
• 1:24:53
  Speaker 1: has never met a teenager before I wrote this line.
• 1:24:56
  Speaker 1: Was when Abigail Breslin's like, I'm sorry, Seth, I can't
• 1:25:00
  Speaker 1: calm to hang out, and he's like, but Haley, half
• 1:25:03
  Speaker 1: of the history classes going and You're like, yeah, teenagers
• 1:25:07
  Speaker 1: do be saying that all the time, just like music
• 1:25:09
  Speaker 1: executives are always saying you can't quit it's Grammy season.
• 1:25:15
  Speaker 1: I have another really fun example of a person who
• 1:25:18
  Speaker 1: hasn't been a teenager in many decades and who has
• 1:25:21
  Speaker 1: never talked to a teenager since. So toward the beginning
• 1:25:24
  Speaker 1: of the movie, Abigail Breslin is like with her group
• 1:25:27
  Speaker 1: of like girlfriends and they're like, oh my god, are
• 1:25:30
  Speaker 1: you going to kiss Seth tonight? Do you even know
• 1:25:32
  Speaker 1: how to kiss, and then one teenager says they have
• 1:25:36
  Speaker 1: a video on the internet that shows you how to kiss,
• 1:25:39
  Speaker 1: and then another teenager chimes in and says they have two,
• 1:25:43
  Speaker 1: one for regular kissing and one for passionate kissing. I'm like,
• 1:25:48
  Speaker 1: are you trying to talk about YouTube? Are we like
• 1:25:50
  Speaker 1: doing like a helicopter around the word YouTube and we
• 1:25:54
  Speaker 1: can't get there? You know, the two YouTube videos about
• 1:25:58
  Speaker 1: how to kiss us about kissing? Giant that down as well.
• 1:26:03
  Speaker 1: I was like, teenagers, they're always watching those two YouTube
• 1:26:06
  Speaker 1: videos about kissing. Oh, here's another example of the the
• 1:26:10
  Speaker 1: writer not knowing anything about comedy writing. Josh Dummel, whose
• 1:26:15
  Speaker 1: character's name is apparently Sam. We guess is that the
• 1:26:19
  Speaker 1: like the exclusive after party and he gets surrounded by
• 1:26:23
  Speaker 1: a couple of women who are like throwing themselves at him,
• 1:26:26
  Speaker 1: and he almost looks to camera in like giggles, and
• 1:26:30
  Speaker 1: he says, I'm a Sam witch because his name is
• 1:26:35
  Speaker 1: Sam and he's sandwitched by a couple of women. And
• 1:26:38
  Speaker 1: that's a joke there, That is what is meant to
• 1:26:41
  Speaker 1: be a joke. The only good comedy in this movie
• 1:26:46
  Speaker 1: is when they put Michelle Pifer in the Spider Man
• 1:26:49
  Speaker 1: turn off the dark. Um like acrobat thing. I did
• 1:26:53
  Speaker 1: laugh when Jessica Bielle says my water broke and Seth
• 1:26:57
  Speaker 1: Meyer says all of it. I did laugh at that.
• 1:27:00
  Speaker 1: So that whole scene is just baff like he's like,
• 1:27:03
  Speaker 1: I'm a horse doctor, your water broke. What's happening? Like?
• 1:27:09
  Speaker 1: I like the scene where Sophia Rigara and Katherine Heigl
• 1:27:11
  Speaker 1: throw eggs again, the most feminist scene in the movie.
• 1:27:17
  Speaker 1: And um, you know, we have to respect the symbolism.
• 1:27:22
  Speaker 1: It's an allegory. It's a bad scene, but they are
• 1:27:24
  Speaker 1: throwing eggs for the whole thing. Yeah, Hilary Swang saying
• 1:27:27
  Speaker 1: you rock. That's exciting. That's great. Well, to jump back
• 1:27:30
  Speaker 1: to the pregnancy storyline really quickly, a couple of things
• 1:27:33
  Speaker 1: on that when they when they bumped, the when they
• 1:27:36
  Speaker 1: push their pregnancies against each other. Yes, that's that's that
• 1:27:41
  Speaker 1: definitely happened. And so basically the women and this is
• 1:27:44
  Speaker 1: more Jessica beal antagonizing Sarah Paulson. But Sara Paulson seems
• 1:27:50
  Speaker 1: very chill, like, she seems like she's being kind of
• 1:27:52
  Speaker 1: like bullied by her charm school husband to participate in
• 1:27:56
  Speaker 1: all this because she keeps being like, I don't really care,
• 1:27:58
  Speaker 1: Like I just want to give birth to a healthy child,
• 1:28:02
  Speaker 1: which like fair. There's that whole scene where her husband,
• 1:28:06
  Speaker 1: Sarah Paulson's husband, she's like, Wow, we're gonna win grand
• 1:28:12
  Speaker 1: and he's like, no, it's much less than that. That's
• 1:28:14
  Speaker 1: not the amount. You're wrong. You're wrong, you're wrong, And
• 1:28:17
  Speaker 1: we understand that it's because like he doesn't want to
• 1:28:20
  Speaker 1: like reveal to this other pregnant couple that he's nagging
• 1:28:24
  Speaker 1: his nine months pregnant wife. Ever we've seen they appear
• 1:28:28
  Speaker 1: in to the point where she feels like she needs
• 1:28:31
  Speaker 1: to apologize to him for her water not breaking when
• 1:28:34
  Speaker 1: he wanted it to. Yes, and that is awful. Um.
• 1:28:39
  Speaker 1: But basically, because these two husbands are very competitive about
• 1:28:44
  Speaker 1: winning this money, which they don't seem to need because
• 1:28:49
  Speaker 1: they seem to be doing fine financially, there's always going
• 1:28:53
  Speaker 1: to be sick horses, that's right, um, But they're kind
• 1:29:00
  Speaker 1: the competitive rubs off on to their wives, and then
• 1:29:05
  Speaker 1: the women get pitted against each other in this pregnancy storyline.
• 1:29:09
  Speaker 1: And one thing that I was like, okay, again, here's
• 1:29:11
  Speaker 1: the movie doing the bare minimum. The two women do
• 1:29:14
  Speaker 1: apologize to each other towards the end, but it just
• 1:29:18
  Speaker 1: it was such a flimsy story to begin with that
• 1:29:22
  Speaker 1: I I just hated like seeing the women pitted against
• 1:29:26
  Speaker 1: each other and then like having to apologize for it
• 1:29:29
  Speaker 1: because their husbands are like being just toxic and overly
• 1:29:33
  Speaker 1: competitive and like almost having like a dick measuring contest
• 1:29:37
  Speaker 1: about whose wife can go and labor first kind of thing. Yeah,
• 1:29:41
  Speaker 1: it just fucking sun like. And then at the end
• 1:29:44
  Speaker 1: where like Seth Meyers and Jessica Biel are like, oh,
• 1:29:46
  Speaker 1: wait a second, we're rich, we don't need dollars. I
• 1:29:49
  Speaker 1: guess we'll just give it to Sarah Paulson and the
• 1:29:51
  Speaker 1: charms School guy because they already have children, which was
• 1:29:56
  Speaker 1: another thing that they reveal that You're like, oh, I
• 1:29:58
  Speaker 1: guess that would have It would have and helpful to
• 1:30:00
  Speaker 1: know that earlier. Would it would have made the thing
• 1:30:02
  Speaker 1: with the money make more. I don't I don't know,
• 1:30:05
  Speaker 1: but I'm like, you own a charm school? Is the
• 1:30:07
  Speaker 1: charm school failing? Like? What is that? What's happening? I
• 1:30:09
  Speaker 1: don't know, I don't know. This last movie is so bad.
• 1:30:14
  Speaker 1: It's so corrible. There's another really poorly done joke where
• 1:30:20
  Speaker 1: the spy kids, mom, doctor, get her name. Um, she
• 1:30:26
  Speaker 1: says to Seth Meyers because Seth Meyers is like trying
• 1:30:29
  Speaker 1: to negotiate like a split of the winnings with her. Yeah,
• 1:30:33
  Speaker 1: and she's not having it. And she says, you're dangerously
• 1:30:36
  Speaker 1: close to a rectal exam and he's like, no, don't
• 1:30:40
  Speaker 1: give me a rectal exam, because what's more humiliating than
• 1:30:45
  Speaker 1: someone doing something to a man's like anus? It's exhaust day.
• 1:30:53
  Speaker 1: I hate this movie so much. It's bad. It makes
• 1:31:00
  Speaker 1: to be said to watch. I hate how carefully I
• 1:31:03
  Speaker 1: had to pay attention to it in order to know
• 1:31:06
  Speaker 1: what was happening. I don't know. I mean, maybe it
• 1:31:10
  Speaker 1: was worth it to see Michelle Phifer flowing around a stage.
• 1:31:13
  Speaker 1: Maybe it wasn't. Who am I to say? It's definitely
• 1:31:17
  Speaker 1: one of the worst movies I've ever seen that it's
• 1:31:21
  Speaker 1: just so expensive it maybe want to watch um. Every
• 1:31:25
  Speaker 1: time Sherlock Holmes Um Trunk of Shadows popped up, I'm like,
• 1:31:29
  Speaker 1: I would rather be watching this. And I know that
• 1:31:31
  Speaker 1: movie is bad. I've seen it. It's simply a disaster.
• 1:31:36
  Speaker 1: It's so here. I made a short list of the
• 1:31:39
  Speaker 1: people whose talents were wasted in this movie because I
• 1:31:43
  Speaker 1: think some of the casting was like, yeah, I don't
• 1:31:45
  Speaker 1: really respect you as an actor, and I think you
• 1:31:48
  Speaker 1: were well cast for this movie. But there are some
• 1:31:50
  Speaker 1: people who are, like you just feel so bad that
• 1:31:52
  Speaker 1: they're in this movie. For me, alle Berry is at
• 1:31:55
  Speaker 1: the top of the list, Sarah Paulson, Hilary Swink, Hector
• 1:31:59
  Speaker 1: Elizondo and I'll throw Zac Efron in there, I don't care,
• 1:32:05
  Speaker 1: and Michelle Piper and I guess I mean Robert de Niro.
• 1:32:10
  Speaker 1: Robert DeNiro. He's in a lot of shitty movies, but
• 1:32:15
  Speaker 1: he's a talented actor. You do get the feeling that
• 1:32:18
  Speaker 1: Gary Marshall bullied him into doing this, like someone owed
• 1:32:23
  Speaker 1: someone a favor there maybe, like I don't know, because
• 1:32:26
  Speaker 1: Gary Marshall, like he directed Princess Diaries, which is probably
• 1:32:31
  Speaker 1: why actor Alixanda is there. He directed Pretty Woman, he
• 1:32:34
  Speaker 1: directed Beaches, he directed Runaway Bride, like, he directed a
• 1:32:38
  Speaker 1: lot of you know, iconic rom coms and then just
• 1:32:42
  Speaker 1: like started making really bad rom coms. But r I P. Gary,
• 1:32:49
  Speaker 1: Um we yeah you started strong and then there was
• 1:32:53
  Speaker 1: a few weird ones at the end, but uh, yeah,
• 1:32:58
  Speaker 1: what the fund is going on? Apparently. Jessica Biale, Aston Kutcher,
• 1:33:01
  Speaker 1: and Hector Alexando are also in Valentine's Day, a movie
• 1:33:04
  Speaker 1: I have seen but remember zero percent of the Only
• 1:33:07
  Speaker 1: thing I remember about Valentine's Day is that Taylor Swift
• 1:33:10
  Speaker 1: kisses Taylor a loatner because Taylor a lot nor only
• 1:33:14
  Speaker 1: day it's other people Taylor. I love that for him.
• 1:33:19
  Speaker 1: I think that I've gotten. I mean, I feel like
• 1:33:21
  Speaker 1: we're leaving out or like just forgetting so much, but
• 1:33:24
  Speaker 1: there's only we. I mean, it's so difficult to process
• 1:33:28
  Speaker 1: everything that happens in this movie, so truly is Yeah,
• 1:33:32
  Speaker 1: I I guess I just wanted to touch one more time,
• 1:33:35
  Speaker 1: particularly on because Sophia Regara has been the center of
• 1:33:40
  Speaker 1: a large discussion about the over sexualization of latin X
• 1:33:44
  Speaker 1: women in particular for so long. There's a lot of
• 1:33:48
  Speaker 1: different opinions on it. We are obviously not the two
• 1:33:51
  Speaker 1: people to make any sort of judgment call on it,
• 1:33:54
  Speaker 1: and it's something that I want to talk about with
• 1:33:56
  Speaker 1: latin X guests in the near future view. UM, but
• 1:34:01
  Speaker 1: I just wanted to shout out a couple of articles
• 1:34:04
  Speaker 1: and UM we can link this in the description as well. UM.
• 1:34:08
  Speaker 1: For some of them. I wouldn't even say it's like
• 1:34:12
  Speaker 1: necessarily criticism, just several Latin X writers that have written
• 1:34:15
  Speaker 1: about her career and the sorts of parts that she's
• 1:34:19
  Speaker 1: played in the past. So the first one is from
• 1:34:23
  Speaker 1: this year from in Pop Sugar by Jennifer Paula Varella Rodriguez.
• 1:34:29
  Speaker 1: It's called say what you Want, but Sophia Vergara has
• 1:34:32
  Speaker 1: broken barriers for Latin X people on primetime TV and beyond.
• 1:34:36
  Speaker 1: Then there's also interviews with Sofia Vergara on this topic.
• 1:34:40
  Speaker 1: One is in Vanity Fair back in seventeen with Johanna Desta.
• 1:34:47
  Speaker 1: The headline is, and I would recommend reading the whole
• 1:34:49
  Speaker 1: thing Sofia regarda to critics, what's wrong with being a stereotype.
• 1:34:53
  Speaker 1: So it's a very large discussion that we'll be having
• 1:34:56
  Speaker 1: with guests, but I just wanted to sort of shout
• 1:34:58
  Speaker 1: out that there's a certain the notes of that in
• 1:35:01
  Speaker 1: the part she's playing in this movie. Yes, yeah, I
• 1:35:05
  Speaker 1: will have to check those articles out. Thank you for
• 1:35:09
  Speaker 1: doing that research, Jamie and um. I look forward to
• 1:35:14
  Speaker 1: having this discussion and greater detail and more depths in
• 1:35:19
  Speaker 1: coming episodes. We're hinting at an upcoming episode. But it's
• 1:35:25
  Speaker 1: a surprise, it's a secret, but it does pass the
• 1:35:31
  Speaker 1: Battel test. It does past effectively, it does does it, oopsie,
• 1:35:37
  Speaker 1: it does. Between a few different um Sarah, Jessica Parker
• 1:35:42
  Speaker 1: and Abigail Breslin, we mentioned that scene that passes where
• 1:35:46
  Speaker 1: Abigail Breslin exposes her bra, but the context of most
• 1:35:51
  Speaker 1: of their conversations is, Mom, why can't I hang out
• 1:35:55
  Speaker 1: with the boy that I like? Similar to the exchanges
• 1:35:59
  Speaker 1: betwe between Katherine Heigel and Sofia Regara, where they have
• 1:36:03
  Speaker 1: a few exchanges that are just like two line back
• 1:36:06
  Speaker 1: and forth the technically passed, but like the context of
• 1:36:09
  Speaker 1: most of their conversations are about Jensen. Jessica Biale and
• 1:36:14
  Speaker 1: Sarah Paulson talk about their pregnancy competition. But they're Greg's,
• 1:36:20
  Speaker 1: They're they're little Gregg's and but then also like their
• 1:36:23
  Speaker 1: husbands are always like right there. So none of these passes.
• 1:36:27
  Speaker 1: And I mean, I'd almost be mad if there was
• 1:36:30
  Speaker 1: like a really like good exchange of dialogue that does
• 1:36:34
  Speaker 1: pass the Bechdel tests in an otherwise terrible, terrible movie,
• 1:36:37
  Speaker 1: because it feels like it wouldn't. This movie, this movie
• 1:36:40
  Speaker 1: doesn't deserve. It mostly passes by accident, by accidents, by
• 1:36:46
  Speaker 1: sure coincidence or mistakes, so spiritually it doesn't pass. Spiritually
• 1:36:51
  Speaker 1: it doesn't pass. I'm getting this movie no nipples. I'm
• 1:36:54
  Speaker 1: giving this like nothing, nothing for this movie. Yeah, the
• 1:36:59
  Speaker 1: few again, the few, like bare minimum moments where I'm like, okay,
• 1:37:02
  Speaker 1: at least Katherine Heigel stands up for herself and it
• 1:37:06
  Speaker 1: doesn't want to go on tour because she has her
• 1:37:09
  Speaker 1: own career, or like when the regnant women apologize to
• 1:37:14
  Speaker 1: each other again, like it's canceled out by every other
• 1:37:18
  Speaker 1: obscene thing that happens in the movie. So zero nipples,
• 1:37:23
  Speaker 1: zero nipples, which is also what I give. The year
• 1:37:28
  Speaker 1: gets zero nipples, zero nipples. I think that we actually
• 1:37:32
  Speaker 1: kind of jinx stuff last year, because do you remember
• 1:37:35
  Speaker 1: when someone sent us a clip of us being like,
• 1:37:37
  Speaker 1: twenty two might be really fine. So I'm just gonna
• 1:37:40
  Speaker 1: go in neutro. I'm gonna I find it best to
• 1:37:46
  Speaker 1: have very low expectations because even if something not terrible happens,
• 1:37:51
  Speaker 1: they exceed your very low expectations. So I'm going to
• 1:37:54
  Speaker 1: go on record as saying will be the worst year
• 1:37:58
  Speaker 1: in recorded history. I'm gonna have no take because thank you,
• 1:38:03
  Speaker 1: it gives me stream anxiety. Um. Well that well, there's
• 1:38:08
  Speaker 1: another year and that's New Year's Eve. So this New
• 1:38:12
  Speaker 1: Year's Eve, please stay inside and don't want this movie.
• 1:38:20
  Speaker 1: Here's the best way to ring. Please don't watch this movie. Yes,
• 1:38:26
  Speaker 1: So we'll be back next year with lots of fun episodes,
• 1:38:32
  Speaker 1: lots of surprises. Maybe we'll leave our houses this year,
• 1:38:34
  Speaker 1: maybe we won't. Kind of just like a fun rolling
• 1:38:38
  Speaker 1: of the dice. Um, but we'll be back with you.
• 1:38:42
  Speaker 1: Thank you to everyone who's listened. Thanks for common hang
• 1:38:48
  Speaker 1: for a fun end of your episode. And you can
• 1:38:53
  Speaker 1: find us online by at Bechtel Cast, on Instagram, on
• 1:38:58
  Speaker 1: Twitter we gave up on faith Bug. You can contribute
• 1:39:01
  Speaker 1: to our Patreon ak Matreon, patreon dot com slash Becketel Cast.
• 1:39:06
  Speaker 1: Five dollars a month gets you to bonus episodes plus
• 1:39:11
  Speaker 1: access to I think like eighty other bonus episodes. Holy moly,
• 1:39:19
  Speaker 1: that's right. Yes, And then you can also check out
• 1:39:21
  Speaker 1: our merch store at t public dot com slash the
• 1:39:25
  Speaker 1: Bechtel Cast. And here's something that I just want to
• 1:39:27
  Speaker 1: shout out because people always ask us who designs our
• 1:39:31
  Speaker 1: merch and because we never mentioned this, but it's all Jamie.
• 1:39:34
  Speaker 1: It's me. Jamie does all the merch, it's me. So
• 1:39:38
  Speaker 1: all those block letters, guess what is my little my
• 1:39:42
  Speaker 1: little pause? What am I saying? It is me? Thank you? Uh?
• 1:39:46
  Speaker 1: Do you wait, Jamie? Do you draw? Or do you ill?
• 1:39:53
  Speaker 1: The the hubers of his saying that and then showing
• 1:39:56
  Speaker 1: me the worship I've ever seen in my life, I
• 1:39:58
  Speaker 1: swear to God. All right, that's twenty twenty. We love you,
• 1:40:02
  Speaker 1: Happy New Year, and let the best the JJ win.
• 1:40:08
  Speaker 1: Bye bye bye