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How to Get Out of Mom Burnout · Arise Women of God

• 0:00
  Hey mamas, have you ever felt completely trapped in a dark pit of burnout, fantasizing about a total rescue?
• 0:08
  Maybe you imagine winning the lottery to hire a full time maid, your husband magically taking over half of the mental load overnight, or just running away to a quiet hotel for a month by yourself to sleep.
• 0:23
  It is completely normal to want a massive exit strategy when the walls feel like they're closing in.
• 0:30
  But today we're going to pivot from that false rescue fantasy and look at how God actually delivers us out of the pit.
• 0:40
  Line upon line, one small step at a time.
• 0:44
  And by the end of today's episode, you will have a biblical blueprint for dropping the heavy rocks that you were never meant to carry on your back.
• 0:53
  Let's dive in.
• 0:55
  Ordinary women Extraordinary Faith Walking with Christ, we arise God Strong.
• 1:04
  Hello and welcome back to the Arise Women of God podcast.
• 1:08
  I'm your host, Tamara K.
• 1:09
  Anderson, and today we are answering the desperate question, how do I actually get out of this burnout when I feel entirely overwhelmed?
• 1:21
  And as we begin, I invite you to listen with your heart and see if you can feel what small, tiny step I God is nudging you to take today.
• 1:32
  And here's what we're going to be talking about.
• 1:34
  First, Peter on the waves and what Matthew chapter 14 teaches us about drowning, reaching out, and the reality of the baby step.
• 1:44
  Second, we're going to discuss the small things.
• 1:47
  Why crossing just one minor thing off your calendar is a biblical strategy from Zechariah Number three, the not to do list hack, which is more my exact prayerful method for clearing my schedule when I feel overwhelmed.
• 2:04
  And finally, we're going to talk about the guilt of saying no.
• 2:07
  And I'm going to give you two gracious, guilt free scripts to use when you are declining outside demands.
• 2:14
  But first, let's kick it off by looking at how Jesus rescues us from deep water.
• 2:20
  So when you are drowning in this wilderness of burnout, you often don't have the energy to digest a massive life overhaul.
• 2:30
  Let's peek at the story of Peter In Matthew 4:28 31, Peter steps out onto the water, but then he sees the boisterous waves and wind.
• 2:41
  He panics and he begins to sink.
• 2:44
  He is drowning and he is trapped.
• 2:47
  Then he cries out, lord, save me.
• 2:51
  And Jesus immediately stretches forth, his hand catches him.
• 2:55
  And then step by step, hand in hand, they walk back to the boat together.
• 3:01
  When a mom is drowning in that pit of burnout, she doesn't have the energy to swim back to the boat on her own.
• 3:09
  But the good news is deliverance doesn't require a massive life overhaul.
• 3:14
  It just requires one baby step taken side by side with Jesus.
• 3:19
  And that very first step is simply calling out and reaching your hand up.
• 3:26
  God doesn't expect a drowning woman to fix her entire schedule in one day.
• 3:32
  He just asks her to reach out for that first small lifeline so they can begin making changes together.
• 3:42
  But ladies, the problem is when we are burned out, we often reject those small lifelines, thinking crossing one minor task off my calendar is not going to cure my exhaustion.
• 3:55
  I need a month off.
• 3:58
  And often, ladies, we probably do.
• 4:00
  But let's look at Zechariah 4:10, which asks for who hath despised the day of small things?
• 4:08
  Hmm, that is a good question.
• 4:11
  God operates in the small things.
• 4:14
  Deliverance, he says, happens line upon line.
• 4:17
  And if you have a backpack filled with 50 heavy rocks, taking one small rock out today doesn't immediately make the backpack feel empty.
• 4:27
  But it is one rock lighter.
• 4:30
  So dropping one rock a day eventually empties your entire load.
• 4:37
  So you cannot despise the small baby steps of creating boundaries, of changing things one thing at a time.
• 4:45
  In fact, there is actual scientific studies to back up this biblical principle.
• 4:50
  My daughter recently told me about a fascinating 2022 medical study.
• 4:56
  Researchers took a group of people and scanned their brains.
• 5:00
  Half of the group went for a one hour walk on a busy city street and the other half went for a one hour walk in a quiet forest.
• 5:09
  Then they scanned their brains again and the people who walked in the forest showed a massive decrease in the activity of their amygdala.
• 5:19
  And that's the part of your brain responsible for processing stress, fear, and that hyper vigilant mom rage we talked about recently.
• 5:29
  The people who walked in the city, their brains didn't calm down at all.
• 5:34
  And the best part?
• 5:35
  The researchers found that this biological healing in the forest was especially significant in women.
• 5:44
  Sister One hour, one baby step of walking in nature physically cooled down the stress center in their brains.
• 5:55
  Taking a small break isn't just a cute idea.
• 5:58
  It is a biological rescue plan.
• 6:02
  Isn't that cool?
• 6:04
  That first illuminated baby step for me is what I call my not to do list.
• 6:08
  And it is my absolute go to to brainstorm the little changes I need to make when I am burned out.
• 6:16
  You can find the example for this in our free download, which I'm going to talk about at the end of today's episode.
• 6:22
  If you're anything like me, you're usually carrying way too many things that you feel you're supposed to do and most of them are great things like volunteering or helping church members.
• 6:33
  But I find as I use this not to do list and write down everything taking up my time and then I prayerfully go over it, I'm always surprised by what God inspires me to change.
• 6:46
  Once you make a list of the things demanding your time, you just take them one at a time and pray about them and ask God, which ones can I automate?
• 6:57
  Meaning like a grocery subscription or an automatic bill pay?
• 7:01
  Which ones can I delegate?
• 7:04
  Meaning who else can carry this?
• 7:06
  Recently I taught through this list with my husband and kids and we decided that they could take over making several meals a week that took a massive physical and mental load off my plate.
• 7:20
  The third thing is eliminate what can completely go away.
• 7:24
  The next thing you can do is change it.
• 7:26
  How can this be adjusted?
• 7:28
  Recently I felt completely overwhelmed again and God inspired me to talk to my counselor and co host Wendy on this podcast.
• 7:37
  As I unloaded my burdens, we prayerfully realized that doing five podcast episodes a week, which was needed most of the year, could change to only three per week.
• 7:49
  Sometimes all we have to do is ask and God will reveal what we can immediately do changed to free us up and give us some breathing room.
• 7:58
  The last option on the list is keep what are the absolute essentials that God wants you to retain on your list of those?
• 8:06
  The hardest prayerful impressions to follow are when God says no to something you actively enjoy doing.
• 8:13
  For example, I once felt a distinct prompting that I needed to stop recording a radio show I was doing with some friends.
• 8:21
  Those are hard things to drop because I was doing good.
• 8:24
  But God is at the helm and he teaches us exactly what is most important for us to drop when we feel burned out.
• 8:34
  Now my friend, once you have drawn that boundary and created some breathing room in your life, we need to address the guilt.
• 8:43
  A not to do list is totally useless if guilt prevents you from actually acting on the impressions that you receive.
• 8:52
  I know a woman who prayerfully felt she should cut her volunteering in half, but the emotional challenge of saying no almost stopped her.
• 9:03
  You need a script to kind of gracefully decline obligations without over explaining or apologizing for your boundaries.
• 9:10
  Here's some ideas of what you can try saying I'm so honored you asked me, but my family requires my full bandwidth right now, so I have to say no.
• 9:21
  Or simply say I'm happy with what I have on my plate right now.
• 9:25
  That is it.
• 9:26
  That is how you graciously say no.
• 9:29
  Teach your heart that Every single time you say no to an outside demand, you are saying yes to your physical healing and your family's peace.
• 9:40
  Once your schedule is simplified, just keep readjusting it with God's help, line upon line.
• 9:47
  Oh my friend, deliverance is not a fantasy.
• 9:50
  It is a practical step by step walk back to the boat with Jesus.
• 9:55
  And if you need help taking that very first baby step, I invite you to go to the Show Notes right now and click the link to download our free copy of a Mom's Burnout Reset Guide.
• 10:06
  In this guide you'll get access to our mom not to do list so you can sit down today, empty your brain onto the paper and let God show you exactly which heavy rocks to drop first.
• 10:17
  Grab the download and start reclaiming your breathing room.
• 10:22
  My dear sister, God sees you sinking, but he never expects you to swim out of deep water on your own strength.
• 10:30
  Reach up your hand today and ask him what you can eliminate or change and trust that he will gently guide you back to solid ground.
• 10:41
  I testify that he will because he has guided my baby steps out of burnout over and over for the past many decades and I'm in a much better place emotionally and physically.
• 10:53
  And I have learned in the process.
• 10:54
  I'm so much better able to recognize both the signs and at hearing God's gentle whisper when I get thrown off track.
• 11:03
  As we close, I invite you to act on one thing that God has whispered on your heart that you can do differently.
• 11:12
  So my friend, take one tiny step forward each day with God.
• 11:17
  Thanks for joining us and may you be blessed as you arise as a woman of God.
• 11:24
  If today's episode helped you feel a little closer to God, please like and subscribe.
• 11:29
  It helps us grow and ensures Heaven's whispers stay at the top of your feed whenever you need the most.