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The Great Unfollowing · Outspoken the Podcast

0:04
Speaker 1: Hello and welcome to Outspoken. It's your dose of the
0:07
Speaker 1: hottest influencer and pop culture news twice a week. I'm
0:10
Speaker 1: Amy Torber and coming up on today's show, why Steph
0:14
Speaker 1: Clare Smith is losing followers, Tammy Hembrough takes London for
0:18
Speaker 1: just two days and our Friday debrief. But first, Bachelor
0:22
Speaker 1: contestant Tani Leeson celebrated her baby shower in style in.
0:26
Speaker 2: Melbourne over the weekend.
0:27
Speaker 1: The lavish affair comes off the back of her baby daddy,
0:30
Speaker 1: Justin McKeon, missing his second court hearing where he's been
0:34
Speaker 1: accused of stealing almost half a million dollars from his
0:37
Speaker 1: former employer, Rocket Brands. Now, Sophie, I was surprised to
0:40
Speaker 1: see Tani celebrating in Melbourne and not in Perth. Yeah,
0:43
Speaker 1: there has been a bit of contention as to where
0:45
Speaker 1: the couple is actually living, because back in January, it
0:48
Speaker 1: was reported that Justin was living back in his hometown
0:51
Speaker 1: of Perth to be close to his family, and it
0:53
Speaker 1: appeared as though Tani had ventured over to be by
0:56
Speaker 1: his side. And since Tani broke the news of her pregnancy,
0:59
Speaker 1: she made her Instagram account private and she only has
1:01
Speaker 1: around 6,000 followers, which might surprise some people. She did
1:05
Speaker 1: go on The Bachelor when it wasn't as popular. I'm
1:07
Speaker 1: actually one of those 6,000 people following her in my Finster. Yeah,
1:11
Speaker 1: so you have been keeping a track of what has
1:14
Speaker 1: been going on. It's also been difficult to track exactly
1:17
Speaker 1: where they are because Justin deleted his account following the
1:20
Speaker 1: fraud allegations, but he has since made a super private
1:23
Speaker 1: account with very few followers. So when Justin didn't actually
1:27
Speaker 1: appear at his court hearing in Melbourne last week, which
1:30
Speaker 1: we discussed on Friday, Amy, there was a theory that
1:32
Speaker 1: maybe they were still in Perth and hadn't bothered to
1:35
Speaker 1: make the journey over. And as mentioned, I do have
1:37
Speaker 1: access to Tani's account and I have been keeping a
1:39
Speaker 1: close eye on it. And I was pretty shocked when
1:41
Speaker 1: all these glamorous photos popped up from the baby shower. Yeah,
1:44
Speaker 1: because they held it at a rather upmarket Melbourne restaurant
1:48
Speaker 1: called Half Acre. And the event space is set on
1:51
Speaker 1: an old timber mill south of Melbourne. It has this
1:53
Speaker 1: beautiful outside garden space. And Tani posted a series of
1:57
Speaker 1: photos looking as though she didn't have a care in
1:59
Speaker 1: the world. In one of them, she was laughing and
2:02
Speaker 1: looking to the side whilst wearing a $ 500 designer gown.
2:05
Speaker 1: And on Instagram, she wrote that it was more than
2:08
Speaker 1: just a baby shower. She said, feeling very blessed to
2:11
Speaker 1: be surrounded by such supportive and incredible women. While not
2:14
Speaker 1: all could be here today, those who could really did
2:17
Speaker 1: make it a day I won't forget. A really massive
2:19
Speaker 1: thank you though to my wonderful sister, Danica Jane, who organized,
2:22
Speaker 1: set up and journeyed several hours away from her young
2:25
Speaker 1: family To make this day so special, I'm enormously grateful
2:28
Speaker 1: for you and everything you've ever.
2:30
Speaker 2: Done for me.
2:31
Speaker 1: You're such a powerhouse of a woman, mother and sister.
2:33
Speaker 1: My little boy is so blessed to have you as
2:36
Speaker 1: his auntie. It's nice to hear that Tani has so
2:38
Speaker 1: much support from her family and friends because this would
2:41
Speaker 1: be an incredibly difficult time for her. I feel very
2:43
Speaker 1: sorry for her. Kate, you said you were surprised to
2:45
Speaker 1: see that she had shared so many photos from her
2:47
Speaker 1: baby shower. I wasn't because since she's announced that she's pregnant,
2:51
Speaker 1: there has been this attitude of sort of almost sweeping
2:54
Speaker 1: all of the stuff to do with Justin under the rug.
2:56
Speaker 1: It's rather awkward because Justin has been accused of stealing
2:59
Speaker 1: half a million dollars from his former employer. And it
3:02
Speaker 1: has been documented that he is having to live off
3:04
Speaker 1: an allowance because whilst that money is unaccounted for, they
3:08
Speaker 1: can't allow him to be spending money outside of his means.
3:11
Speaker 1: So clearly Tani is probably having to pay for this
3:14
Speaker 1: or her family, which of course is absolutely fine. She
3:17
Speaker 1: is in a financial state to do that. But it
3:19
Speaker 1: does seem awkward putting on this lavish event. I may
3:22
Speaker 1: be reading too much into this, but I thought it
3:23
Speaker 1: was interesting that her caption started off by saying that
3:26
Speaker 1: she was very blessed to be surrounded by.
3:28
Speaker 2: Supportive and incredible people.
3:30
Speaker 1: Women. I understand that, but I thought she might've mentioned
3:34
Speaker 1: her partner amongst it. Sometimes the partner rocks up at
3:36
Speaker 1: the baby shower and they give flowers and they look
3:38
Speaker 1: like the good guy that's there.
3:40
Speaker 2: He did not turn up.
3:41
Speaker 1: To the baby shower.
3:42
Speaker 2: Well, that we know of. He wasn't pictured.
3:45
Speaker 1: I did find it interesting though, because when you look
3:48
Speaker 1: and they have all the little games that people play
3:50
Speaker 1: and he was included in that in the sense of
3:52
Speaker 1: they said, oh, what will you get from your parents?
3:54
Speaker 1: But at a lot of baby showers, they have baby McKeon,
3:57
Speaker 1: you know, the father's name everywhere. There was no mention
4:00
Speaker 1: of the father's name anywhere. Well, I suppose because they're
4:02
Speaker 1: not actually married. So the baby might not necessarily be
4:05
Speaker 1: taking on that last name. That's true. The theme of
4:08
Speaker 1: this baby shower was blue because we have discovered that
4:11
Speaker 1: the couple are expecting a baby boy. I'm surprised I
4:14
Speaker 1: didn't get a message from you, Sophie, because every time
4:16
Speaker 1: someone has a baby these days, it's like another boy. Like,
4:19
Speaker 1: is anyone having girls? I saw a TikTok which echoed
4:21
Speaker 1: my sentiment. Someone said, what the hell is happening? Are
4:24
Speaker 1: women becoming extinct? Because every single person I hear is
4:27
Speaker 1: having a boy. Even people online are all having boys.
4:31
Speaker 2: Now, Tani did.
4:31
Speaker 1: Wear a blue dress, which she looked beautiful in. She
4:34
Speaker 1: had blue table decor, as well as blue cupcakes and games.
4:38
Speaker 1: And hearing that this is a baby boy, for some reason,
4:40
Speaker 1: it made me feel sad because I was thinking about
4:41
Speaker 1: the fact that this boy could potentially not have his
4:44
Speaker 1: dad in his life growing up. Because while Justin is
4:47
Speaker 1: facing civil proceedings at the moment, This has the potential
4:50
Speaker 1: to move onto criminal charges and also lengthy jail time.
4:54
Speaker 1: As we discussed last week, Justin's failure to appear in
4:57
Speaker 1: court has been taken as a sign that he's not
4:59
Speaker 1: going to defend the allegations going forward. A pretty strange
5:02
Speaker 1: move considering he has got a baby on the way.
5:04
Speaker 1: You would have thought that he would have wanted to
5:06
Speaker 1: lodge a very strong defence against these allegations. Well, the
5:09
Speaker 1: court heard last week that Justin allegedly admitted to the theft.
5:13
Speaker 2: So perhaps he's thought.
5:14
Speaker 1: I'm just going to save money and not appear in
5:16
Speaker 1: court because his lawyers have also dropped him. Mm-hmm. Well,
5:19
Speaker 1: it appears that Tani must be in her final trimester
5:22
Speaker 1: of pregnancy. It'll be interesting to watch this space and
5:25
Speaker 1: see how the story evolves.
5:27
Speaker 3: I just got to London. I look crazy, like my
5:32
Speaker 3: bags under my eyes.
5:35
Speaker 1: Tammy Hembrough has flown 24 hours for a two-day English
5:38
Speaker 1: countryside getaway. The fitness influencer travelled solo for the all-expenses-paid
5:43
Speaker 1: PR trip. Now, so fans couldn't believe she traveled all
5:46
Speaker 1: that way for just two days. All I can say
5:49
Speaker 1: is it must be worth her while to go on
5:51
Speaker 1: this brand trip. She's been sent to the UK by
5:53
Speaker 1: a London makeup and skincare brand called Wonderskin. So not
5:57
Speaker 1: only would they be paying for this trip, But they
5:59
Speaker 1: would also be paying her a massive appearance fee. And
6:02
Speaker 1: you would also think sponsorship posts on her Instagram. Well,
6:05
Speaker 1: I'd kind of want to be paid a big appearance
6:07
Speaker 1: fee if I was having to travel for just two
6:10
Speaker 1: days in the UK. Yeah, but we've got to remember,
6:11
Speaker 1: she's flown over their business class or first class. I
6:14
Speaker 1: saw a picture of a lay down bed. It's not
6:16
Speaker 1: like she's slumming it in economy. Yeah, but for Tammy,
6:19
Speaker 1: she would be used to that luxury of flying first class.
6:22
Speaker 2: Like it's probably not even a big thing for her anymore.
6:24
Speaker 1: I would actually love to legitimately know how much she's
6:27
Speaker 1: being paid because there's always talk about, oh, she earns
6:29
Speaker 1: like $ 30, 000.
6:30
Speaker 2: For a post.
6:31
Speaker 1: I mean, to physically get her to travel that far
6:33
Speaker 1: for two days.
6:35
Speaker 2: Is it really worth it?
6:36
Speaker 1: Like has the brand paid her 200k or something? Yeah,
6:39
Speaker 1: but she's also got the lure of her two younger
6:41
Speaker 1: sisters being in London at the moment. So Starlet and
6:44
Speaker 1: Ava just moved over there very recently. I saw everyone commenting.
6:47
Speaker 1: They're like, why the hell would you move to the
6:49
Speaker 1: UK from Australia? I mean, they were obviously people who
6:52
Speaker 1: live in the UK. Her followers were pretty shocked to
6:54
Speaker 1: see that she'd only be spending two days in the UK.
6:57
Speaker 1: One follower wrote, girl, what a 24 hour flight for
7:00
Speaker 1: two nights is insane.
7:02
Speaker 2: Actually, How are you awake?
7:03
Speaker 1: Whilst another said only two nights is crazy. Now, Tammy
7:07
Speaker 1: went on to explain that the reason that the trip
7:09
Speaker 1: is so short is because she hates being away from
7:11
Speaker 1: her kids. Here's a bit of what she said.
7:13
Speaker 3: Groups like without the kids, I always go for like
7:18
Speaker 3: the shortest amount possible. So if I'm going somewhere with
7:20
Speaker 3: a brand or going somewhere for an event, I literally
7:23
Speaker 3: will always fly in and fly out. I just don't
7:25
Speaker 3: like being away from my baby's.
7:28
Speaker 2: Do you think Matt's been trusted to look after the kids?
7:31
Speaker 1: Well, that's what I thought was a bit unfair because
7:33
Speaker 1: when she initially posted that she was at the airport,
7:36
Speaker 1: a lot of her followers were like, where are the kids?
7:38
Speaker 1: Why aren't you with them?
7:39
Speaker 2: Who's looking after them?
7:40
Speaker 1: What about her baby daddy that's off living in Bali
7:43
Speaker 1: away from them? Exactly.
7:44
Speaker 2: I mean, she has a new husband. It's the kid's stepdad.
7:47
Speaker 1: She also has sisters that live close by.
7:49
Speaker 2: This is a legitimate work trip.
7:51
Speaker 1: Why is she not allowed to have two days away?
7:53
Speaker 1: I assumed that Wolf and Saskia were with Rhys' parents
7:57
Speaker 1: or Tammy's parents because when Tammy has traveled in the past,
8:00
Speaker 1: she said, oh yeah, Saskia and Wolf are with their
8:02
Speaker 1: grandparents who they don't seem to get to see that often.
8:05
Speaker 1: And Posey would be with her dad, Matt Paul. How
8:07
Speaker 1: much would you guys have to be paid to fly
8:09
Speaker 1: for two days to the UK? I do it for
8:12
Speaker 1: the experience, if I'm completely honest, especially if I was
8:14
Speaker 1: traveling business class. For another job I did, I traveled
8:18
Speaker 1: to the US for five days and that was including
8:20
Speaker 1: the travel days. And it was quite hellish, but it
8:23
Speaker 1: was just an exciting experience. Maybe you're saying this because
8:25
Speaker 1: you haven't had to do the trek to the UK. Yeah,
8:29
Speaker 1: but it's.
8:29
Speaker 2: Similar to the US.
8:30
Speaker 1: Yeah, it would be amazing to spend, you know, 48 hours,
8:33
Speaker 1: for example, in London. I don't know if I could
8:36
Speaker 1: back it up with those two flights in a row.
8:38
Speaker 1: But also, would you feel comfortable leaving Jack at home
8:40
Speaker 1: for two days in order for the experience? Well, if
8:43
Speaker 1: it's only two days, it's really not that long. I also,
8:46
Speaker 1: I just feel for female influencers though, because they get
8:49
Speaker 1: so much flack whenever they're away from their kids. That's
8:51
Speaker 1: why I feel like Tammy thought it was important to
8:53
Speaker 1: preface that she was only there for a few days.
8:56
Speaker 1: I mean, that's like the dads who will be like, oh,
8:58
Speaker 1: I'm babysitting my kids on Saturday night because, you know,
9:02
Speaker 1: the mum's out at a fucking dinner with her friends. No,
9:04
Speaker 1: you are not babysitting your own kids. Yeah, don't use
9:06
Speaker 1: the word babysit. That's the thing with Tammy. She does
9:09
Speaker 1: try and present that she's got this really strong co-parenting
9:11
Speaker 1: relationship with Matt Paul and Rhys Hawkins. And it seems
9:15
Speaker 1: to be the case with Matt Paul, but when it
9:17
Speaker 1: comes to Rhys Hawkins, he's literally living in a different country.
9:19
Speaker 1: So as much as she likes to say that things
9:22
Speaker 1: are really great between them. If she needs to go
9:24
Speaker 1: on this brand trip, she does have to find an
9:26
Speaker 1: alternative babysitter.
9:27
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I feel sorry for her with that. That's
9:29
Speaker 2: really not fair.
9:30
Speaker 1: And then the fact that the spotlight's on her, oh,
9:33
Speaker 1: where are the kids going to be?
9:34
Speaker 2: Why aren't they with you?
9:35
Speaker 1: That being said, I cannot get over how much Tammy
9:38
Speaker 1: Sunwolf looks like Matt Sikowski. Like if you actually put
9:42
Speaker 1: him and also Reese, I would say that that was
9:44
Speaker 1: Matt's kid. See, I can see Reese Hawkins in him
9:46
Speaker 1: as well. I can't. this jet lag seemed to hit
9:49
Speaker 1: Tammy really hard because she put up an Instagram story
9:52
Speaker 1: in her hotel room when it was 2am saying that
9:54
Speaker 1: she couldn't sleep. She tried everything and she's resigned herself
9:58
Speaker 1: to the fact that she's not going to adjust to
9:59
Speaker 1: the timeframe in two days. So she actually ended up
10:02
Speaker 1: going to the gym. Why would you even bother trying
10:05
Speaker 1: to adjust to the jet lag? Like it was never
10:07
Speaker 1: going to happen. I would just be like, huh, just
10:09
Speaker 1: going to wing it and see.
10:10
Speaker 3: How we go.
10:10
Speaker 1: That's pretty much what she did. And she said it
10:12
Speaker 1: was the right decision. She felt so good after this workout.
10:16
Speaker 4: I think anytime I speak about his sleep, I get
10:19
Speaker 4: a mixture of opinions, which is obviously valid.
10:24
Speaker 1: Steph Claire Smith is dividing her audience one sleep update
10:28
Speaker 1: at a time. The fitness entrepreneur regularly updates her followers
10:31
Speaker 1: about her three-year-old son's sleep. However, followers are tapping out
10:35
Speaker 1: after the model complained about her toddler's early rise after
10:39
Speaker 1: an 11-hour stretch of sleep. Now, before we get into it, Kate,
10:43
Speaker 1: can you provide us a little bit of background? Yeah,
10:45
Speaker 1: so Steph has a three-year-old son called Harvey and is
10:48
Speaker 1: 30 weeks pregnant with her second child. And anyone who
10:50
Speaker 1: is pregnant will know that sleep is very important at
10:53
Speaker 1: that time. I just don't know how anybody can have
10:56
Speaker 1: a toddler and also be pregnant because as someone who
10:58
Speaker 1: is 34 weeks pregnant, the thought of having to look
11:01
Speaker 1: after a small child at the same time, it.
11:03
Speaker 2: Just blows my mind.
11:04
Speaker 1: Like people who do that are actually super women. It's
11:07
Speaker 1: enough having a puppy dog who wakes you up very
11:09
Speaker 1: early to go out for a wee after I've had
11:11
Speaker 1: like four tests to the toilet.
11:13
Speaker 2: I'm like, oh my God.
11:14
Speaker 1: So I do feel- sympathetic for Steph, this would be tough. Yeah.
11:16
Speaker 1: And on top of that, she is a co-founder of
11:19
Speaker 1: multi-million dollar fitness business, Kik, that she works four days
11:22
Speaker 1: a week at. Her husband, Josh, is the primary caregiver
11:25
Speaker 1: of their son, which she often cops a lot of
11:27
Speaker 1: criticism for. Yeah. And very unfairly, I think people are
11:30
Speaker 1: so shocked to see a dad actually taking on that responsibility.
11:34
Speaker 1: But in their case and their financial situation, why wouldn't
11:37
Speaker 1: he when she's the breadwinner? It makes so much sense.
11:40
Speaker 1: And a lot of people follow Josh on Instagram and
11:42
Speaker 1: TikTok as well, because Previously, he would share a lot
11:45
Speaker 1: of content with their son, Harvey. And it got to
11:48
Speaker 1: the point where Harvey was being recognized out on the street.
11:51
Speaker 1: So we've spoken about it a few times that Steph
11:54
Speaker 1: and Josh made the decision to start blurring their three-year-old
11:57
Speaker 1: son's face, sometimes in quite a comical way. Because it
12:00
Speaker 1: first started off as like a bit of a squiggle
12:02
Speaker 1: on his face. It then progressed to a blur. Emojis.
12:05
Speaker 2: Yeah, emojis.
12:06
Speaker 1: We recently had some flowers in an Uber Eats ad story.
12:10
Speaker 1: blocking his face in quite a funny way. And sometimes
12:13
Speaker 1: the emoji would just disappear altogether and you'd see his
12:15
Speaker 1: face anyway. I have to say, as well as being
12:17
Speaker 1: in Josh's content, he has featured in a lot of
12:20
Speaker 1: Steph's content. And even though they have made these changes
12:24
Speaker 1: to protect his privacy, he's a hot topic.
12:26
Speaker 2: On our Instagram story.
12:27
Speaker 1: We get constant updates about his sleep, about his tantrums.
12:31
Speaker 2: And a lot of.
12:32
Speaker 1: People are confused because they've said, well, You've kind of
12:35
Speaker 1: pointed out that you want to keep him off your socials,
12:38
Speaker 1: but you're still willing to talk about him. He is
12:40
Speaker 1: the cover artwork for the Kick Bump podcast, which I
12:42
Speaker 1: also find confusing. Yeah, and the updates about Harvey are
12:46
Speaker 1: often quite negative and have to do with how much
12:48
Speaker 1: sleep he has. Steph seems to be quite focused on
12:51
Speaker 1: how much sleep she is also getting. So she often
12:54
Speaker 1: shares screenshots of her sleep app to show her quality
12:57
Speaker 1: of sleep. That's something that should stay in your family
12:59
Speaker 1: group or a group with friends. I don't even think
13:01
Speaker 1: family is interesting. Sometimes you and mom, when you first
13:04
Speaker 1: started tracking your sleep, you both be like, oh my God,
13:06
Speaker 1: look what I got. I have to say no one
13:08
Speaker 1: else cares. You know what I mean?
13:09
Speaker 2: Like no one else.
13:10
Speaker 1: When you get your Apple watch or you get your,
13:12
Speaker 1: is it Aura Ring or whatever it's called, You do
13:15
Speaker 1: become obsessed with it, but I think once you have
13:18
Speaker 1: a child, I think you need to throw that out
13:20
Speaker 1: the window.
13:20
Speaker 3: Oh, yeah.
13:20
Speaker 2: You can't be looking at that.
13:23
Speaker 1: And I have seen a lot of people who used
13:25
Speaker 1: to live by their Apple Watch, like a lot of
13:27
Speaker 1: fitness experts say that they no longer track it because
13:30
Speaker 1: it becomes this self-serving thing. Like if you've seen you've
13:32
Speaker 1: had four hours of sleep, then you start to get
13:35
Speaker 1: angry and you feel like it ruins your whole day. Yeah.
13:38
Speaker 1: I mean, I've actually stopped wearing my Apple watch. I
13:40
Speaker 1: used to wear it religiously for like the last, I
13:42
Speaker 1: don't know, seven years only because it has a screen
13:44
Speaker 1: on it. So Jack always gets distracted by it. Well,
13:47
Speaker 1: as a lot of followers, anytime we'd ever post a
13:49
Speaker 1: group photo on our outspoken Instagram account, someone would be
13:53
Speaker 1: wearing an Apple watch at like a fucking wedding. It
13:55
Speaker 1: just triggers everyone. Yeah. They were like, take that off.
13:58
Speaker 1: Sharing about your sleep reminds me of the people that
14:00
Speaker 1: always have to share their Strava updates. It's almost like proof,
14:03
Speaker 1: like look at the run I did or look at
14:05
Speaker 1: how little sleep I've had. Can you actually track your
14:07
Speaker 1: walk on Strava without posting it? Because I just thought
14:09
Speaker 1: you had to. So I post mine all the time. No,
14:11
Speaker 1: but I mean the people who then go to the
14:13
Speaker 1: lengths of then putting on their Instagram story to be like,
14:15
Speaker 1: I mean, to be fair, whenever you do do a run,
14:17
Speaker 1: you feel like such a legend.
14:18
Speaker 2: You've got to tell everyone about it.
14:19
Speaker 1: I think with Steph, she's wanting to share some of the,
14:23
Speaker 1: I suppose, not so glamorous sides of motherhood and her
14:25
Speaker 1: life to be relatable. Because as you said, She owns
14:28
Speaker 1: this multi-million dollar business. She's a model. So to be relatable,
14:33
Speaker 1: she kind of needs to share.
14:34
Speaker 2: Some of these updates.
14:35
Speaker 1: Yeah, well, last week there were a couple of updates
14:38
Speaker 1: that really aggravated people. So Steph shared a photo of
14:41
Speaker 1: her looking solemn with water splashed on her face with
14:44
Speaker 1: the caption, me late last night sitting with the guilt
14:47
Speaker 1: of yelling at Harvey after hitting my point of overwhelm
14:49
Speaker 1: from no more patience. She then went on to explain
14:52
Speaker 1: that she left the room, splashed water on her face
14:54
Speaker 1: and did a controlled breathing exercise, which allowed her to reset.
14:58
Speaker 1: And she finished up by saying that bedtime was rough
15:00
Speaker 1: last night, but she couldn't be fucked to go into
15:02
Speaker 1: the details. Now, a few days later, Steph shared another
15:06
Speaker 1: update about Harvey's sleep, writing.
15:07
Speaker 2: After 6 p.m.
15:08
Speaker 1: Bedtime, Harv slept through but woke at 5 a.m. ready
15:11
Speaker 1: to start his day. I was not with the laughing
15:13
Speaker 1: face emoji. So Josh got him up and took him
15:16
Speaker 1: for a long walk and I slept in till 6.30 a.m.
15:19
Speaker 1: I woke to Harvey pulling me out of bed to
15:20
Speaker 1: show me the flowers he found me on his walk. Now,
15:23
Speaker 1: this update sparked a massive reaction in our Facebook group
15:27
Speaker 1: with many of our listeners admitting they've unfollowed Steph because
15:30
Speaker 1: of her constant complaints about parenting. Now, according to Social Blade,
15:34
Speaker 1: which tracks influencers' followings, Steph has lost over 2,700 followers
15:40
Speaker 1: in the last 30 days. Now, I had a look
15:42
Speaker 1: at her overall following and it has taken a hit
15:45
Speaker 1: in the last year. So since January 2024, Steph has
15:49
Speaker 1: lost almost 30,000 followers and that calculation takes into consideration
15:53
Speaker 1: people who have followed and unfollowed. So her overall following
15:58
Speaker 1: is on the decline. Do you think that has anything
16:00
Speaker 1: to do with her announcing her pregnancy? Because I know
16:03
Speaker 1: that might sound like a weird question because a lot
16:05
Speaker 1: of the time when influencers announce they are having a baby,
16:09
Speaker 1: they will get an increase in followers. But Steph Claire Smith,
16:12
Speaker 1: a lot of her initial popularity on Instagram is Was
16:15
Speaker 1: because she was a model. So a lot of men
16:17
Speaker 1: follow Steph Clare Smith. So I wonder, and I think
16:20
Speaker 1: I've heard her speak about this on the podcast before.
16:22
Speaker 1: I wonder if a lot of those men who originally
16:24
Speaker 1: followed her were like, oh, I don't want to follow
16:26
Speaker 1: this pregnancy content.
16:27
Speaker 2: I'm not interested in this. stuff about Kik anymore. Because
16:30
Speaker 2: she used to be.
16:32
Speaker 1: One of the biggest Aussie influencers. I think she was
16:34
Speaker 1: one of the first to get to a million followers.
16:36
Speaker 1: And I think a lot of it had to do with,
16:38
Speaker 1: I don't want to say creeps, but a lot of
16:40
Speaker 1: men who were like, oh my God, she's gorgeous.
16:42
Speaker 2: I want to follow her for her bikini photos.
16:44
Speaker 1: Well, if you take a look at her engagement rate
16:46
Speaker 1: on Social Blade, it is surprisingly quite low. So she's
16:49
Speaker 1: sitting on 0.64%. I did have a look at her
16:52
Speaker 1: influence appears to put that engagement rate into perspective. And
16:55
Speaker 1: her best friend, Laura Henshaw has 1.1%. while Jade Tunchi
16:59
Speaker 1: has 2.9, Sarah's Day has 1.15, Abby Chatfield has 1.37,
17:05
Speaker 1: and friend of the show, Courtney Mangan, has 3.38%. So
17:07
Speaker 1: she is a micro-influencer. So it's interesting to compare that
17:12
Speaker 1: sometimes micro-influencers have a much better engagement rate to those
17:15
Speaker 1: that have millions of followers. But also you've got to
17:17
Speaker 1: think 0.64% of 1.4 million people is a lot higher
17:19
Speaker 1: than you know, 3% or maybe 30,000. I think people
17:25
Speaker 1: with larger followings in the millions often struggle to actually
17:29
Speaker 1: increase their engagement rate. I understand that, but it is
17:32
Speaker 1: still quite a low engagement rate because less than 1%
17:36
Speaker 1: is considered low engagement while between 1% and 3.5% is
17:39
Speaker 1: considered quite regular and good. Between 3.5% and 6% is
17:43
Speaker 1: high and above 6% is very high. I think that
17:46
Speaker 1: people are engaging with content differently now. I've even noticed
17:51
Speaker 1: I feel more reluctant to like or comment on things.
17:54
Speaker 1: I would never comment on an influencer's post, whereas I
17:58
Speaker 1: think people may direct send them on, which obviously leads
18:01
Speaker 1: to engagement as well. But I've seen a lot of
18:03
Speaker 1: people saying that they don't even want to like their
18:05
Speaker 1: own friend's shit anymore. I think that's a bit too far.
18:07
Speaker 1: But I do think TikTok is usually a good indicator
18:10
Speaker 1: of whether an influencer is resting on their laurels of
18:12
Speaker 1: attracting a big following in the early days of Instagram,
18:14
Speaker 1: because Only 140,000 of Steph's 1.4 million followers have transferred
18:19
Speaker 1: across to TikTok, which is quite surprising. Why do you
18:22
Speaker 1: think so many people are up in arms about these
18:24
Speaker 1: updates about Harvey's sleep? Well, I did read all of
18:27
Speaker 1: the comments in our Facebook community, which I think give
18:29
Speaker 1: an interesting snapshot. So to summarize the thoughts of our community,
18:33
Speaker 1: many people think that Steph doesn't have age-appropriate expectations on
18:37
Speaker 1: her son. And some also accused her of being unrelatable
18:41
Speaker 1: and tone deaf to those who don't have a village
18:44
Speaker 1: like she does. So to put this comment into perspective,
18:47
Speaker 1: Steph gets a lot of support, not only from her husband, Josh,
18:49
Speaker 1: who is the primary caregiver, but also her son's grandparents.
18:53
Speaker 1: So she often talks about them babysitting Harvey for the
18:56
Speaker 1: weekend or overnight to let her sleep in. And then
18:58
Speaker 1: others criticized Steph for sharing personal details about him, despite
19:02
Speaker 1: previously saying that she was trying to protect his privacy
19:04
Speaker 1: by covering his face. That is something that I do
19:06
Speaker 1: grapple with because quite often I see Steph's content and
19:09
Speaker 1: I noticed that she is out a lot of the
19:12
Speaker 1: times during the week, like at an influencer event or
19:14
Speaker 1: at a concert, which again, I mean, if he's asleep,
19:17
Speaker 1: then whatever.
19:19
Speaker 2: But is that her work as well? Well, that's the thing.
19:21
Speaker 1: That's what would be quite complicated because in order to
19:23
Speaker 1: be an influencer and keep connections, she would have to
19:25
Speaker 1: go to those things. So they would be considered work.
19:28
Speaker 1: But I think that that's maybe what rubs people up
19:30
Speaker 1: the wrong way. A lot of mums who are maybe
19:32
Speaker 1: stay-at-home mums are like, well, I don't have this freedom
19:34
Speaker 1: and flexibility. And, you know, don't you expect to have
19:36
Speaker 1: some time where maybe he wakes you up? Do you
19:38
Speaker 1: think it's also because Steph is the breadwinner in quotations
19:43
Speaker 1: and that like if you reverse the roles, can you
19:45
Speaker 1: imagine if there was a dad who was out working
19:47
Speaker 1: and his wife was at home and he was on Instagram?
19:49
Speaker 1: being like, oh, I didn't even sleep last night. And
19:52
Speaker 1: now people would be like, oh, fuck off. You're not
19:54
Speaker 1: even at home looking after the kids. That is actually
19:56
Speaker 1: such a good point. I think it's because she tries
19:58
Speaker 1: to make her brand also being a mother. And I
20:03
Speaker 1: think that there's this terribly outdated expectation that women should
20:07
Speaker 1: be the primary caregivers. So a lot of mums probably
20:09
Speaker 1: get their noses out of joint and say, well, you
20:11
Speaker 1: don't even spend much time with him, which isn't the case. Well,
20:13
Speaker 1: that is a common complaint about Steph. I mean, people
20:14
Speaker 1: have even blamed her son's sleep issues because she goes
20:17
Speaker 1: to work, which I think is completely unfair. I mean,
20:19
Speaker 1: there was a small portion of commenters in our Facebook
20:22
Speaker 1: group saying that they found Steph's updates very refreshing, especially
20:25
Speaker 1: those who also struggle with their children's sleep. And they
20:29
Speaker 1: said it made them feel less guilty about not being
20:31
Speaker 1: the perfect mum. One listener also reminded the community that
20:34
Speaker 1: Steph is running a multi-million dollar company while being pregnant
20:37
Speaker 1: and a mum. I do think there is an element
20:39
Speaker 1: of internalized misogyny at play as much as we may
20:42
Speaker 1: not want to admit it. I think it still is
20:44
Speaker 1: a foreign concept for a lot of us to wrap
20:46
Speaker 1: our heads around that the mother goes out to work
20:49
Speaker 1: full-time and the dad is a stay-at-home parent and maybe
20:51
Speaker 1: one that a lot of us are envious of because
20:53
Speaker 1: when I look at this, I currently am the primary
20:56
Speaker 1: caregiver of my son and I'm like, geez, it'd be
20:58
Speaker 1: nice to get to go to all of these events
21:01
Speaker 1: and also work as much as I want to And
21:03
Speaker 1: then also enjoy my beautiful son. I also think a
21:05
Speaker 1: lot of people were triggered by the fact that Steph
21:08
Speaker 1: said that Harvey had slept 11 hours that night. And
21:11
Speaker 1: she also followed it up because a lot of people
21:13
Speaker 1: were like, well, maybe don't put him down at 6pm,
21:15
Speaker 1: put him down a little bit later. So then he
21:17
Speaker 1: sleeps a little bit later. But then she goes, oh,
21:20
Speaker 1: when am I meant to have time to spend with Josh?
21:23
Speaker 1: And then it's like, but the kid's not a robot.
21:25
Speaker 1: He can't just fit automatically into the times that you
21:27
Speaker 1: want him to be awake. I have to defend Steph
21:29
Speaker 1: a little bit though, because I do think we need
21:32
Speaker 1: to cut her some slack, the fact that she is
21:34
Speaker 1: 30 weeks pregnant. I mean, sometimes when I see her
21:37
Speaker 1: putting up her stories and she's speaking about losing it
21:40
Speaker 1: at Harvey, I get it. Pregnancy rage is real. And
21:43
Speaker 1: it would be so difficult being sleep deprived. I mean,
21:47
Speaker 1: as the woman, your body is going through so much.
21:50
Speaker 1: She's probably not sleeping. She's probably sleeping next to her
21:52
Speaker 1: partner who's fucking snoring all night. And then she's having
21:55
Speaker 1: to go out and slog her guts out in the
21:57
Speaker 1: gym for kick.
21:58
Speaker 2: She's working really long hours.
22:00
Speaker 1: I mean, Kate, you mentioned, oh, it seems like she's
22:02
Speaker 1: out having all this fun, but she would be missing
22:04
Speaker 1: her child every day. She would be experiencing mum guilt.
22:07
Speaker 1: So it's not that bizarre to me that she would
22:09
Speaker 1: have moments where she would lose it at her toddler.
22:12
Speaker 1: And I kind of respect that she's sharing about it
22:14
Speaker 1: because a lot of mums can feel like they relate
22:17
Speaker 1: to that. Yeah, but I think that she opens herself
22:20
Speaker 1: up to criticism by sharing about it. And I know
22:22
Speaker 1: you said that there is that factor where people can
22:25
Speaker 1: be like, oh, I do that. It makes me feel
22:26
Speaker 1: better about not being a perfect mom. But you can't
22:30
Speaker 1: say that she's not opening herself up to criticism because
22:32
Speaker 1: there's a lot of people who follow her that don't
22:34
Speaker 1: have children. And when you don't have children, you don't
22:36
Speaker 1: realize how much sleep actually controls your life. I think
22:40
Speaker 1: Steph's attempt to try and remain relatable is actually rubbing
22:43
Speaker 1: people up the wrong way. And someone who is actually
22:46
Speaker 1: doing a good job of remaining relatable throughout parenthood is
22:49
Speaker 1: Jade Tunchi, who is also a friend of Steph. So
22:52
Speaker 1: she often speaks on her Instagram story about the difficulties
22:54
Speaker 1: of motherhood, and she backs it up by saying, then
22:57
Speaker 1: genuinely sharing things that she loves about it. So it
23:00
Speaker 1: kind of balances its way out. And Jade shared this
23:04
Speaker 1: week about how her nine-month-old keeps waking up inconsolably and
23:07
Speaker 1: won't sleep overnight. And she apologized to her non-parent followers
23:11
Speaker 1: and said before she had her son, she used to
23:14
Speaker 1: find it really irritating hearing parents go on and on
23:16
Speaker 1: about their children's sleep. And she said after being in
23:19
Speaker 1: the sleep trenches for nine months now, she totally gets
23:22
Speaker 1: it because it just consumes you and takes up 80%
23:25
Speaker 1: of your attention and rules your life. Jade Tunchi is
23:28
Speaker 1: somebody who has really gone up in my view of
23:31
Speaker 1: influences because I know we spoke about her in quite
23:34
Speaker 1: a critical way when she was the betrothed, but I
23:36
Speaker 1: think it was because we didn't.
23:37
Speaker 2: Get a sense of humor.
23:38
Speaker 1: I've seen a completely different side to her since she's
23:40
Speaker 1: had that podcast with her husband. And she is quickly
23:43
Speaker 1: becoming one of my favourite influences.
23:45
Speaker 3: Well, I don't.
23:45
Speaker 1: Necessarily think we saw the wrong side of her. I
23:47
Speaker 1: thought maybe motherhood has changed her a bit because she
23:50
Speaker 1: was calling out a lot of, you know, she got
23:52
Speaker 1: in trouble for calling out a luxury honeymoon spot. You know,
23:55
Speaker 1: she did do some things that were wrong. Yeah, but
23:57
Speaker 1: I'm not saying everything she has done previously was perfect.
24:00
Speaker 1: But now I know her sense of humour is.
24:03
Speaker 2: I actually get it more.
24:04
Speaker 1: And I've heard around the traps that she's actually one
24:06
Speaker 1: of the nicest influences at events.
24:08
Speaker 2: She's very funny. She talks to everybody.
24:10
Speaker 1: She wants to unblock us so we can still follow
24:12
Speaker 1: her content.
24:13
Speaker 2: That would be great.
24:14
Speaker 1: I do follow her on my Finster and I very
24:16
Speaker 1: much enjoy her content because my son is the same
24:20
Speaker 1: age as her son. So I relate on that level. Now,
24:23
Speaker 1: on Thursday, off the back of Jade's update, Steph explained
24:26
Speaker 1: that she shares Harvey's sleep updates for a little solidarity
24:30
Speaker 1: and to make others feel like they're less alone if
24:32
Speaker 1: they're going through a similar thing.
24:34
Speaker 2: She also said this.
24:35
Speaker 4: Also, this is my last story about sleep tonight, today.
24:42
Speaker 4: But I saw Jade post about this the other day
24:44
Speaker 4: and it made me laugh because I know that there's
24:47
Speaker 4: people who are so over me talking about Harvey's sleep.
24:49
Speaker 4: Trust me, I've been basically doing it since the day
24:51
Speaker 4: he was here. Um, but I feel like the people
24:55
Speaker 4: that are over it are the people that get to
24:57
Speaker 4: sleep at night, whether they don't have children or they
25:00
Speaker 4: have children who have not really had much trouble with sleeping.
25:02
Speaker 4: The people who are over it are generally the ones
25:06
Speaker 4: that can't relate. So next time you think like, oh,
25:11
Speaker 4: there she goes talking about sleep again. Think how grateful
25:14
Speaker 4: am I that my mind is not consumed by sleep
25:18
Speaker 4: all the time.
25:20
Speaker 1: Now, as a mother of a nine month old, I
25:22
Speaker 1: can definitely vouch for Steph that sleep absolutely consumes you.
25:25
Speaker 1: Even when your child is sleeping, you are then working
25:27
Speaker 1: in overdrive to ensure you stick to the same routine
25:30
Speaker 1: to make sure it keeps happening. So I totally get this.
25:34
Speaker 1: And in saying that, Steph updates have still rubbed me
25:36
Speaker 1: up the wrong way. So I suppose some of us
25:38
Speaker 1: have to look at ourselves and work out what's going
25:40
Speaker 1: on and why that is. Well, I saw this TikTok
25:42
Speaker 1: the other day and it was saying, can we normalize
25:44
Speaker 1: that people who don't have children and are in their
25:48
Speaker 1: 30s and are working full time are also tired.
25:51
Speaker 2: And that went off. I mean, I couldn't agree more. Obviously,
25:54
Speaker 2: I have an experience. Can we come back and see
25:56
Speaker 2: if you agree?
25:56
Speaker 1: No, but I'm saying I just don't like this tone
25:59
Speaker 1: that only people with children are tired. I can say
26:03
Speaker 1: from being 35 that I have been incredibly tired working full-time. No,
26:08
Speaker 1: but I'm saying in general throughout my life, I'm not
26:11
Speaker 1: going to diminish how tired I have previously been. Okay, well,
26:15
Speaker 1: I invite you in this time next year. To see
26:18
Speaker 1: if you have a different perspective on it. Kate is
26:20
Speaker 1: currently the boss or the president of the Just You
26:24
Speaker 1: Wait committee. I think ultimately what this comes down to
26:28
Speaker 1: is people want to have a whinge online and other
26:32
Speaker 1: people think that they've got it harder than Steph, so
26:34
Speaker 1: she's not entitled to a whinge. I think that that's
26:37
Speaker 1: the summary of the situation.
26:38
Speaker 2: But I also think.
26:39
Speaker 1: Anytime you mention anything about parenting, everyone's going to have
26:42
Speaker 1: a different opinion on it. Let's get into our Friday debrief.
26:46
Speaker 1: Fun fact, it is our 36th birthday today. Sophie, you
26:49
Speaker 1: have been spiraling about it. People on our subs will
26:52
Speaker 1: know what we're talking about.
26:53
Speaker 2: I haven't actually been spiraling.
26:54
Speaker 1: I think that's a bit unfair. I've actually said I'm
26:56
Speaker 1: excited to turn 36 because that was the age I
27:00
Speaker 1: know Princess Diana to have been.
27:01
Speaker 2: When she passed away.
27:03
Speaker 1: Yes, I know. That's the little dark bit of it.
27:04
Speaker 1: Of course, she did pass away at that age, but
27:06
Speaker 1: I'm saying that I thought it was a cool age
27:08
Speaker 1: because That was when she was coming into her own
27:10
Speaker 1: and she finally had her voice and she was very confident. See,
27:13
Speaker 1: that's why I think you were spiraling because I found
27:15
Speaker 1: that quite sick. I didn't really think about the whole
27:17
Speaker 1: death bit, but I just thought, oh, 36 sounds cool
27:19
Speaker 1: because I associate it with Princess Diana. Look, whatever gets
27:23
Speaker 1: Sophie through her birthday without complaining. I've got a bit
27:28
Speaker 1: of a share for this week that if anyone is eating,
27:31
Speaker 1: please put your food away. I was told off for
27:33
Speaker 1: telling this story at family dinner whilst Amy was consuming
27:36
Speaker 1: her meal, but We had a bit of a mystery
27:39
Speaker 1: this week because on Saturday we walked out to go
27:42
Speaker 1: to the car and we've had a lot of work
27:44
Speaker 1: going on at our house. We had this pile of
27:46
Speaker 1: sand in front of the house and I thought the
27:48
Speaker 1: neighbor's dog had come over and done a big poo
27:51
Speaker 1: on this dirt. It turned out it was actually intestines.
27:56
Speaker 1: So there was an animal which had been killed by
27:59
Speaker 1: something and they'd eaten everything but the intestines. Who? Anyway,
28:03
Speaker 1: we thought that this was particularly odd because we'd watched
28:06
Speaker 1: this murder show on Netflix and basically the whole crux
28:09
Speaker 1: of it was that this murderer would string up animal
28:13
Speaker 1: intestines in the yard as a sign that they're about
28:16
Speaker 1: to strike and murder someone else so we were like
28:18
Speaker 1: oh my god this is so freaky so you're sure
28:20
Speaker 1: they were animal intestines well that's what we thought oh
28:22
Speaker 1: my god is this like do is this a serial
28:25
Speaker 1: killer on the blues is this that someone playing a
28:27
Speaker 1: prank on us put this in perspective for those who
28:29
Speaker 1: don't know that you live in the adelaide hills where
28:31
Speaker 1: there's a lot of wildlife around yes some suburban street
28:34
Speaker 1: yeah it's guts on the front of your lawn we
28:36
Speaker 1: were like oh my god we can't live in the
28:37
Speaker 1: hills for much longer this is gross fast forward to
28:40
Speaker 1: two days later brownie goes out into our backyard and
28:42
Speaker 1: finds a possum head perched on the ground just just
28:47
Speaker 1: the head nothing else that is disgusting we thought is
28:51
Speaker 1: someone playing a prank on us what is going on
28:53
Speaker 1: we did a research it is a fox I saw
28:57
Speaker 1: the fox last night when I got home. It had
28:59
Speaker 1: its little white tail in the yard.
29:01
Speaker 2: It freaked me out.
29:03
Speaker 1: There's something quite magical about seeing foxes in the wild. Like,
29:06
Speaker 1: they freak me out, but they're such majestic animals. I'm
29:08
Speaker 1: just so sad because we literally used to have a
29:10
Speaker 1: possum that ran past our bedroom at 12 o'clock every night.
29:14
Speaker 3: I'm like, is that the possum?
29:16
Speaker 1: It's so sad. It's really sad. Amy, have you got
29:18
Speaker 1: anything more positive to share?
29:20
Speaker 2: I do have a bit more of a positive update.
29:22
Speaker 1: It's that I have finally sold my car. So... I
29:25
Speaker 1: have been wheeling and dealing, trying to sell my old
29:27
Speaker 1: car on Facebook Marketplace and also car sales. And my goodness,
29:31
Speaker 1: my ad had over a thousand views. Every man and
29:34
Speaker 1: his dog was reaching out to me wanting this car.
29:37
Speaker 1: It was a Mazda 2, apparently their hot property at
29:39
Speaker 1: the moment. But the amount of time wasters has been incredible.
29:44
Speaker 2: I also am shocked.
29:46
Speaker 1: People would rock up with their mechanics to check out
29:48
Speaker 1: the car. That's smart.
29:50
Speaker 2: It was smart.
29:50
Speaker 1: But the person who eventually bought it, he said he
29:52
Speaker 1: wanted to do an RAA check. So he came along
29:55
Speaker 1: this guy, like this guy in his 60s with his
29:57
Speaker 1: 28-year-old son. The mother came along too. And they said, oh, yeah,
30:01
Speaker 1: we'll do an RAA check.
30:03
Speaker 2: They never did one. They ended up purchasing the car.
30:06
Speaker 1: Didn't they ask you if it came in another color?
30:08
Speaker 1: And you're like, I don't know. The funniest thing was
30:11
Speaker 1: because I'm so pregnant, I just made Dale deal with
30:14
Speaker 1: them all.
30:14
Speaker 2: So poor Dale. He's like six foot five.
30:16
Speaker 1: He's having to get into the back of this tiny
30:18
Speaker 1: Mazda 2 to do all of these test drives with
30:20
Speaker 1: all these fucking randos. And, yeah, they said to Dale, oh,
30:23
Speaker 1: does it come in a different color? And Dale was like, well,
30:25
Speaker 1: we've only got it in red. Well, actually, it does
30:28
Speaker 1: come in another color because I'm currently trying to sell
30:31
Speaker 1: my Mazda 2 as well.
30:32
Speaker 2: Which comes in black if anyone is interested.
30:34
Speaker 1: See, I'm now having regret because I just traded my
30:36
Speaker 1: Mazda 2 in at the dealership, got, like, nothing for it.
30:39
Speaker 1: I told you, Kate, this is why people just trade
30:42
Speaker 1: it in. I got offered some pitiful amount to trade
30:45
Speaker 1: it in and I said, no, I'm going to sell
30:46
Speaker 1: it myself.
30:47
Speaker 2: Yeah, but let's be fair.
30:47
Speaker 1: This has taken about 10 months.
30:48
Speaker 2: 10 months to.
30:49
Speaker 1: Make quite a bit of extra money. It's also because
30:51
Speaker 1: we haven't been bothered, you know. Sorry, one of the
30:53
Speaker 1: other funny things this new, the new owner of my
30:56
Speaker 1: car said was he goes, oh, can I do donuts
30:59
Speaker 1: in it?
31:00
Speaker 2: Like, does it do? And my husband was like.
31:02
Speaker 1: Well, she hasn't been doing donuts, but it is red.
31:06
Speaker 1: So maybe it goes quite fast. Now, I think that
31:08
Speaker 1: is all we have time for today. Thank you so
31:10
Speaker 1: much for joining us for this episode. If you have
31:13
Speaker 1: enjoyed it, could you please make sure you are subscribed
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Speaker 1: on Apple Podcasts and Spotify?
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Speaker 2: And if you do enjoy the podcast, we would absolutely
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Speaker 2: love it.
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Speaker 1: If you could leave us a five-star review. This episode
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Speaker 1: was recorded on the traditional land of the Kaurna people
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Speaker 1: of the Adelaide Plains. We pay respect to elders past
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Speaker 1: and present.