Latest / Heavyweight / Heavyweight Short: Hallie

Transcript

Heavyweight Short: Hallie · Heavyweight

• 0:03
  Speaker 1: Khalila Holt. Yeah, heavyweight producer.
• 0:07
  Speaker 2: Uh huh?
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: Dancer no, singer?
• 0:12
  Speaker 3: M No?
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: Did I say heavyweight producer?
• 0:15
  Speaker 4: Yeah?
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: And today you're going to be more than just a
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: I shouldn't say just today. Today, you're you're going to
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: be presenting us with a story. Yes, I'm excited about.
• 0:27
  Speaker 2: It, thank you.
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: I am too, in anticipation of the season coming up
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: in the fall. Yes, we're going to be We're going
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: to be doing some smaller stories. But smaller is that
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: the right word, because they're they're not small and significance, they're.
• 0:42
  Speaker 2: Just short, kind of just shorter. Yeah.
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: Does it? Does it feel condescending to call them mini episodes?
• 0:49
  Speaker 2: Mmm?
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: Lightweight?
• 0:52
  Speaker 2: I think that's more condescending. Why don't we just call
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: it like heavyweight.
• 0:57
  Speaker 1: Shorts, heavyweight shorts.
• 1:00
  Speaker 2: For summer, shorts for summer.
• 1:03
  Speaker 5: All right, fine, let's call them heavyweight short. And you're
• 1:09
  Speaker 5: going to be presenting us with our inaugural heavyweight short.
• 1:14
  Speaker 2: Yes, today's heavyweight short, Hallie. Right after the break, Hallie
• 1:38
  Speaker 2: keeps coming back to a brief interaction she had with
• 1:40
  Speaker 2: a stranger when she was seventeen years old. The whole
• 1:44
  Speaker 2: thing only lasted a few minutes, but those minutes, she says,
• 1:48
  Speaker 2: set the course for the rest of her life, and
• 1:50
  Speaker 2: the stranger has remained on her mind ever since.
• 1:54
  Speaker 4: Eh, God, like once or twice a year, I think
• 1:56
  Speaker 4: about her.
• 1:57
  Speaker 2: How long has it been now?
• 1:59
  Speaker 6: This was August of twenty twelve, so it's been almost
• 2:04
  Speaker 6: nine years.
• 2:06
  Speaker 2: Nine years ago, Hallie was in high school and dating
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: her first serious boyfriend. She was sexually active for the
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: first time and becoming increasingly anxious about not being on
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: birth control. In health class, the teacher always said to
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: talk to your mom about birth control, but Halle's mom
• 2:23
  Speaker 2: was prone to unpredictable mood swings and could sometimes get violent.
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: The two no longer spoke, so Halle lived with her dad,
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: a strict and religious man who believed it was morally
• 2:34
  Speaker 2: wrong to have sex before marriage. Hallie remembered the day
• 2:37
  Speaker 2: he'd seen her little sister with the guy he didn't
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: approve of, how he'd lifted the boy in the air
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: by his caller. Hallie had no older sister, no aunt
• 2:46
  Speaker 2: nor family friend she could call upon. Not knowing where
• 2:49
  Speaker 2: else to turn, she showed up one day at a
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: healthcare clinic in her hometown of Whitefish Bay, Wisconsin. Her
• 2:56
  Speaker 2: younger sister came along for emotional support.
• 3:00
  Speaker 6: Timed it so that my dad would be at work
• 3:01
  Speaker 6: because it's a you know, it's it's a small town.
• 3:03
  Speaker 6: We were worried about our car being spotted in the
• 3:06
  Speaker 6: parking lot. I was absolutely shitting myself. I was trembling.
• 3:10
  Speaker 6: I was so frightened.
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: The clinic was on a busy street and had lots
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: of windows. Hollie felt exposed even being there. Once she
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: worked up the nerve to approach the woman behind the
• 3:21
  Speaker 2: reception desk, she began to explain her situation.
• 3:24
  Speaker 6: I'm interested in getting on birth control, but it cannot
• 3:29
  Speaker 6: show up on any kind of billion statement because my
• 3:33
  Speaker 6: dad will notice. I'm sure she must have seen how
• 3:37
  Speaker 6: scared we were, because it was something clicked like it
• 3:40
  Speaker 6: was it felt like one of those It felt like
• 3:43
  Speaker 6: one of those moments, one of those like unspoken conversations
• 3:46
  Speaker 6: that sometimes happened between women where one just recognizes the
• 3:49
  Speaker 6: need and another, yeah. Like she got to work, she
• 3:58
  Speaker 6: like started punching a bunch of stuff into the computer,
• 4:01
  Speaker 6: and I remember her leaving the desk at one point
• 4:03
  Speaker 6: to try to like ask some of the other people
• 4:06
  Speaker 6: on staff, like is there any way that we can
• 4:07
  Speaker 6: do this, and ultimately the answer was no, because it
• 4:11
  Speaker 6: would violate I don't even know how many like medical
• 4:13
  Speaker 6: ethics laws. So I was prepared to, like at that point,
• 4:18
  Speaker 6: walk out and just be defeated and think about something
• 4:20
  Speaker 6: you know, tried.
• 4:20
  Speaker 4: I don't know.
• 4:21
  Speaker 6: I don't know what I was gonna I have no
• 4:22
  Speaker 6: idea what I was going to do at that point,
• 4:23
  Speaker 6: probably drop it.
• 4:25
  Speaker 2: But the receptionist didn't drop it. She suggested calling Planned Parenthood,
• 4:30
  Speaker 2: and when Halle was too scared to call, the receptionist
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: said that she would call for her.
• 4:35
  Speaker 6: And she just used the phone right there at the
• 4:38
  Speaker 6: office and pretended to be meet She gave them my name,
• 4:41
  Speaker 6: and she just like she just asked all of the
• 4:43
  Speaker 6: questions that I was too scared to ask, and she
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  Speaker 6: made an appointment in my name.
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: Even though Halle's interaction with the receptionist was brief, she
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: offered Halle more than anyone else had. She didn't shame Halle,
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  Speaker 2: betray her confidence, or judge her. She made her feel
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  Speaker 2: looked after like a caring mother would.
• 5:02
  Speaker 6: I went on to graduate from college and I'm now
• 5:04
  Speaker 6: currently living abroad pursuing my master's degree. But I just
• 5:08
  Speaker 6: can't help but think, you know, I know that none
• 5:11
  Speaker 6: of it would have been possible if I'd if I'd
• 5:13
  Speaker 6: gotten pregnant instead, especially then, like, oh my god, imagine
• 5:17
  Speaker 6: trying to deal with like a pregnancy and a very
• 5:19
  Speaker 6: religious father.
• 5:20
  Speaker 4: Holy shit.
• 5:21
  Speaker 2: And so Hallie and I are talking today because she
• 5:24
  Speaker 2: wants my help in finding the receptionist so she can
• 5:27
  Speaker 2: let her know what an impact she had.
• 5:29
  Speaker 6: I want to say thank you so much for seeing
• 5:32
  Speaker 6: how scared I was, and for making a scary situation
• 5:36
  Speaker 6: manageable and just you know, holding my hand through this
• 5:41
  Speaker 6: and making sure that I was okay.
• 5:42
  Speaker 4: I mean, she's the reason I'm okay.
• 5:45
  Speaker 6: But I didn't have the I didn't have that presence
• 5:47
  Speaker 6: of mine to thank her.
• 5:50
  Speaker 2: And what do you remember about just like what she
• 5:53
  Speaker 2: looked like? I'm assuming you don't remember her name.
• 5:56
  Speaker 4: I don't remember her first her last name.
• 5:58
  Speaker 6: No. I remember her being kind of a heavier sight,
• 6:02
  Speaker 6: black woman wearing scrubs, which probably won't help, you know,
• 6:06
  Speaker 6: but that.
• 6:08
  Speaker 4: Makes sense, I think.
• 6:10
  Speaker 6: I in my mind, she kind of had like long
• 6:12
  Speaker 6: braids that went down to like maybe down to her waist.
• 6:15
  Speaker 6: But that's how I've always That's how I've always remembered her,
• 6:18
  Speaker 6: and I don't know how much of that is embellishment,
• 6:20
  Speaker 6: but I would.
• 6:21
  Speaker 4: I don't know why I would make any of that up.
• 6:23
  Speaker 2: It's not much to go on, but I promised to
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: try to find the receptionist. Luckily, Hallie's sister remembers which
• 6:34
  Speaker 2: clinic they went to that day because it was where
• 6:36
  Speaker 2: their gynecologists worked. I call the clinic and explained to
• 6:40
  Speaker 2: a test turned man that I'm trying to find out
• 6:42
  Speaker 2: who worked reception in twenty twelve because a woman who
• 6:45
  Speaker 2: talked to that person for a few minutes a decade
• 6:47
  Speaker 2: ago wants to talk to her again about something I
• 6:49
  Speaker 2: can't get into at the moment. Will you help me
• 6:52
  Speaker 2: figure out who that receptionist was, I ask? He says no.
• 6:56
  Speaker 2: I call back the next day, hoping I'll get someone else,
• 6:59
  Speaker 2: but the same man answers, and I hang up in
• 7:01
  Speaker 2: a panic. From there, I said in motion a series
• 7:04
  Speaker 2: of increasingly desperate bids for information. I patted Helie in
• 7:08
  Speaker 2: from abroad to call the clinic with me. I send
• 7:11
  Speaker 2: her old gynecologist Facebook messages and even mail a letter
• 7:14
  Speaker 2: to her house, which feels uncomfortably illicit. One should no
• 7:18
  Speaker 2: more contact a doctor at their home, than follow an
• 7:20
  Speaker 2: actor backstage. In the end, none of it yields anything. Finally,
• 7:26
  Speaker 2: I find someone at the head office who's moved by
• 7:29
  Speaker 2: Holley's story and willing to help. I give her Halle's
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: description of the receptionist in the year she'd have been
• 7:34
  Speaker 2: working the front desk, and a few weeks later, she
• 7:37
  Speaker 2: gets back in touch with the name Markina. I'm super nervous.
• 7:44
  Speaker 2: What's the thing that is making you nervous?
• 7:48
  Speaker 6: I guess, I just I've been wanting to thank this
• 7:51
  Speaker 6: person for so long, and I guess I'm worried I'm
• 7:54
  Speaker 6: not going to do a good job.
• 7:56
  Speaker 4: You haven't told her everything, right?
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: I didn't. Yeah, I mean I told her sort of
• 8:00
  Speaker 2: the broad stroke. I'd spoken to Markeina, just briefly, explaining
• 8:04
  Speaker 2: that she'd helped a young woman named Halle long ago.
• 8:07
  Speaker 2: It didn't ring a bell. Still, Markina said that she
• 8:11
  Speaker 2: was happy to talk. Should we call? Do you feel
• 8:13
  Speaker 2: you feel ready?
• 8:15
  Speaker 4: Yes, let's call.
• 8:25
  Speaker 3: Hi.
• 8:25
  Speaker 2: This is Markina Markina. Hi, It's Kalila and Hallie calling.
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: Hi.
• 8:31
  Speaker 4: How are you? I'm good?
• 8:33
  Speaker 7: How are you?
• 8:34
  Speaker 6: I'm well?
• 8:35
  Speaker 4: Thank you.
• 8:37
  Speaker 2: Hallie pauses trying to figure out what to say, and then,
• 8:41
  Speaker 2: just as she did nine years ago, she swallows her
• 8:44
  Speaker 2: fear and begins.
• 8:48
  Speaker 6: So when I was seventeen years old, I was I
• 8:51
  Speaker 6: was sexually active, and I couldn't talk to my parents
• 8:57
  Speaker 6: about it. Me and my younger sister explain the situation, like,
• 9:00
  Speaker 6: we're interested in getting on birth control pills, but our
• 9:03
  Speaker 6: father is the type of person who goes over bills
• 9:06
  Speaker 6: with a fine tooth comb.
• 9:07
  Speaker 3: And if you, oh my gosh, I do remember you?
• 9:13
  Speaker 4: You do?
• 9:15
  Speaker 7: I do remember you? Really?
• 9:21
  Speaker 3: Oh, cry baby, I'm so sorry.
• 9:28
  Speaker 4: You do remember this?
• 9:29
  Speaker 5: Really?
• 9:33
  Speaker 3: I do?
• 9:34
  Speaker 7: I do?
• 9:35
  Speaker 2: I do?
• 9:35
  Speaker 7: And I remember calling my boss you do, that's right,
• 9:40
  Speaker 7: asking her.
• 9:41
  Speaker 3: Like, okay, I don't want to get in trouble, but
• 9:44
  Speaker 3: I want to help her.
• 9:45
  Speaker 4: But do you remember what you did next?
• 9:47
  Speaker 6: You're even after your boss said you guys couldn't help,
• 9:50
  Speaker 6: because I think it would, it would have understandably violated
• 9:53
  Speaker 6: a bunch of ethical you still didn't stop. You called
• 9:59
  Speaker 6: planned parent and you made an appointment in my name.
• 10:03
  Speaker 6: Uh huh. And then the next the following week, I
• 10:06
  Speaker 6: was able to keep that appointment and I got on
• 10:08
  Speaker 6: birth control, and I was Okay. I just think about
• 10:12
  Speaker 6: how lucky I was that you were there that day,
• 10:16
  Speaker 6: and I want to say thank you, thank you so much.
• 10:20
  Speaker 2: I have.
• 10:23
  Speaker 3: Daughters and I was once that scared teenager that needed help.
• 10:33
  Speaker 3: So I always try to be that mother.
• 10:38
  Speaker 7: For someone, or that for someone, or that just someone
• 10:44
  Speaker 7: for someone.
• 10:46
  Speaker 4: No, you were you.
• 10:47
  Speaker 6: That's that's exactly what I needed, and that's exactly who
• 10:50
  Speaker 6: you were. It would have been so easy for you
• 10:53
  Speaker 6: to just after talking to your boss, to say I'm sorry,
• 10:56
  Speaker 6: I can't help you, but uh, I just wanted you
• 11:01
  Speaker 6: to know that I've never forgotten what you did, and
• 11:04
  Speaker 6: for the last nine years I've thought about you. I
• 11:08
  Speaker 6: went on and got my bachelor's degree and I'm actually
• 11:11
  Speaker 6: in the middle of pursuing my master's right now, and
• 11:13
  Speaker 6: I have just always thought that might not have been possible.
• 11:17
  Speaker 4: If I didn't get the help I needed.
• 11:20
  Speaker 2: Markina, what is what is the thing that you remember
• 11:23
  Speaker 2: like about that day? Like what is it that rang
• 11:25
  Speaker 2: a bell for you?
• 11:27
  Speaker 7: When she said when she explained to me about her father.
• 11:34
  Speaker 3: In that moment, it didn't matter about work, it didn't
• 11:40
  Speaker 3: matter about whatever if I was, if I was to
• 11:43
  Speaker 3: be rolled up, you know what, I'm taking one for
• 11:46
  Speaker 3: the team.
• 11:48
  Speaker 7: I knew I could not just leave her be like
• 11:54
  Speaker 7: I had to help her because it was somebody that
• 11:59
  Speaker 7: helped me. My father molested me, and.
• 12:13
  Speaker 3: I had no one to talk to, and I was
• 12:16
  Speaker 3: afraid to tell people. One day, I was walking There's
• 12:25
  Speaker 3: a it's a bridge on one of our streets, and
• 12:31
  Speaker 3: I had went through something terrible that night, I'll say that,
• 12:35
  Speaker 3: and it had something to do with my father. So
• 12:38
  Speaker 3: that morning I decided, you know what, I'm out of here.
• 12:43
  Speaker 3: So I was walking over this bridge and my head
• 12:49
  Speaker 3: was down. I was sad, of course, and there was
• 12:52
  Speaker 3: this man that appeared. We were just walking past each other,
• 12:58
  Speaker 3: and he stopped and he said, whatever it is, it
• 13:01
  Speaker 3: will be okay. You pick your head up and you
• 13:05
  Speaker 3: smile and you keep going. Now we're in the middle
• 13:10
  Speaker 3: of the bridge. I'm going one way, he's going the
• 13:15
  Speaker 3: opposite way. Full minute later, I turned around say thank you,
• 13:23
  Speaker 3: and he was gone. So looking at her reminded me,
• 13:29
  Speaker 3: even though her situation was totally different, Looking at her
• 13:34
  Speaker 3: reminded me of how scared I used to be and
• 13:38
  Speaker 3: how I would reach out. It just wanted someone to help.
• 13:45
  Speaker 6: Me, to hear you, to hear you talk about your past,
• 13:50
  Speaker 6: and now revisit that moment, knowing where you were coming from, m.
• 14:00
  Speaker 2: Is remarkable.
• 14:02
  Speaker 6: I'm so I'm so so grateful that you saw me
• 14:06
  Speaker 6: that day and didn't just like see me in front
• 14:08
  Speaker 6: of you, but you saw what I needed and I
• 14:13
  Speaker 6: remember you like one of the very first things you
• 14:17
  Speaker 6: said was you said you were proud of me for
• 14:19
  Speaker 6: coming in, which was I think exactly what I needed
• 14:25
  Speaker 6: to hear in that moment.
• 14:27
  Speaker 4: And I'm so proud of you. Now, thank you so much.
• 14:36
  Speaker 4: You're welcome, You are so welcome.
• 14:46
  Speaker 2: Halle recently visited Whitefish Bay. She asked Martina if she
• 14:50
  Speaker 2: could see her, and Martina said she'd like that. She
• 14:53
  Speaker 2: still works for the same healthcare network, although at a
• 14:56
  Speaker 2: different clinic, and she told Hallie to come say hi.
• 14:58
  Speaker 2: During the work day, Hallie brought Markina flowers. She drove
• 15:03
  Speaker 2: to the clinic, walked inside the door, and didn't care
• 15:06
  Speaker 2: who saw her. This Heavyweight short was produced by me
• 15:29
  Speaker 2: Khalila Holt along with Stevie Lane, Moheeney mcgauker, and Jonathan Goldstein.
• 15:35
  Speaker 2: Special thanks to Sam Riisman, Sherry Mantz, and doctor Lynde.
• 15:39
  Speaker 2: Katherine Anderson mixed the episode with original music by Christine Fellows.
• 15:43
  Speaker 2: John K. Sampson, Blue dot Sessions, and Bobby Lord. Follow
• 15:46
  Speaker 2: us on Twitter at Heavyweight or email us at Heavyweight
• 15:49
  Speaker 2: at gimlipmedia dot com. You can listen to the show
• 15:52
  Speaker 2: for free on Spotify. We'll be back with a new
• 15:55
  Speaker 2: Heavyweight short in two weeks and a new Heavyweight season
• 15:58
  Speaker 2: this fall.