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Rabbi Moshe Haber Path of the Just: The Balance of a Loyal Shepherd 1.12.26 · Rabbi Moshe Haber - Daily Mussar/Weekly Perasha

• 0:00
  To the team, the closing concept of a Hasid is someone first.
• 0:06
  It's got someone who cares about Hashem and his Hashem.
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  And we discuss someone who cares about Amisa in general.
• 0:13
  And we said that God loves a person who loves his people and
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  it's a major trait among us and we should have a nature to like
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  those people who means a lot of times you see things that
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  happen, one of the Jews, in your mind, in your heart, it should
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  be I'm pulling for them, I'm hoping for them.
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  We all have this nature inside of us.
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  And that is actually the nature of a khasif.
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  When you pull for someone, are you looking for them to succeed?
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  When you love someone, when you care for them, that is a media
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  of a khasif. And he goes on to say that a
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  leader is really a person who is a major proponent, a defender,
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  someone who prays on behalf of his people.
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  That's the leader. Why 'cause if a guy gets up
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  every morning and he prays for his kahala, what Bravo does, So
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  what he's showing is that he cares about them, he worries
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  about them. And that's really what they're
• 1:06
  supposed to be with. Actually, we said they take the
• 1:07
  hit for other people. They are as a hood for other
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  people. They are you and Hashem in front
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  of Hashem that the other, their people should be protected.
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  All these are my daughter Hashi. That's he explains.
• 1:17
  Let's read 412 and 413 together. Can I go for the whole hamelo to
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  me? So I have you to sell.
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  Hashem loves those who love Isaiah, the whole masha'damma
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  magil of Atoli. Isaiah, no more person builds
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  his love to the Jewish people, Karma who magdel Allah.
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  Hashem builds God's love, Todos Vella.
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  And these are the real shepherds on Mateem, the loyal real
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  shepherds, the real leaders, the Jewish people are who are those
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  leaders? She must shrim as Mam Altano.
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  They give of themselves for their sheep for Hashem, sheep
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  with the regime and they work they they seeking Talim as Mam.
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  They're doing different things to make other Jews have success
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  and have peace with to about time.
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  Excuse me, in order to have other Jews have good behold that
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  I came. They're pulling for them, but Om
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  deemed Tami be Perez, and they're standing at the gate.
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  And you've heard stories of leaders in the old times who
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  used to pray and fast and all these things.
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  They weren't doing it for themselves.
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  They were doing it for the kahal right, to get rid of the Great
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  Decrees and to open up the gates of blessing.
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  Compare it to a father who has if you're a parent right and
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  your children go to school, Some teachers seem to ignore your
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  children. All the same, teachers seem to
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  put in a lot of time for your children, which teaches you like
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  better. It's obvious which is you go
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  cannot believe where some of them put in their time and they
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  stretch dedication and they called you after and the one
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  thing how the kids doing all that is indication that they
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  care for your child and as a parent.
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  Nothing makes you happier than a teacher in case we have
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  children. The same is true with God as the
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  parent and the leaders with other Jews who pull for each
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  other. Hashem's eyes, it being a person
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  who's pulling for his children. They care and you need
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  dedicating. You put an extra time time that
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  you don't have to put in money you don't need to spend prayers.
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  You don't need to give all these things that you're doing even
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  though you don't need to. He's all for ourselves,
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  children, and that makes God as happy as it gets and that
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  creates for us if we pull this way, if we think this way, a lot
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  of our current fashion for us. All right.
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  If a father sees that someone cares for his children, a real
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  loyal, dedicated caring for his children, that makes the father
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  happy. But who devoted?
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  It is natural, the feeling that the father feels when he sees
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  his son act this way, when he sees people take care of his
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  children this way. The natural feeling of love in
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  return. Boy and Yami Quan Gadol, some
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  more of love. We say about the Quan Gadol that
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  he's required to pray on behalf of his generation.
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  So the theme to take out of this is that as a Jew, you need to be
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  pulling for the Jews. You see the news, you see things
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  happen in Israel, you see things happen and they bother you and
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  you wonder yourself, why are they bothering me?
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  Why am I nervous? Why am I scared?
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  Why do I care? I've never met them a day in my
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  life. The answer is nature of a Jew
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  need to be avati cell and avati cell is supposed to be in a way
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  that really hurts you or helps you when you see them going
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  through things, you pull for them, you love them, you care
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  for them. And as a leader, the position of
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  a leader needs to be one who worries about his flock.
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  That is a leader. What is a rabbi?
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  Someone who thinks and worries about his people.
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  That's the definition of a rabbi.
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  That's what he's telling you over here.
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  It says over here, who said there was a person who, sadly, a
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  lion had attacked him. A lion ate this person near
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  someone nearby, like 8 miles away of the Bishop in the V.
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  And what happened? Eliyawa Navi stopped visiting
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  the rabbi. I used to visit the rabbi all
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  the time. Eliyawa Navi stopped visiting
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  the rabbi because a lion attack an individual a stranger a few
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  miles away. What does that attack have to do
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  with the rabbi? Answers.
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  The rabbi was to blame to a degree for not praying on behalf
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  of his people. That's so Eliyawa Navi blamed
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  some level of blame on the rabbi for lack of protection for his
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  people. Because look, an incident
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  happened nearby, we see from near Hakova A muteled a la
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  Hassidim, the responsibility that is on the great people,
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  Levi kesh unleasheda de la Benedoran to care about the
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  generation. That's the idea, that's the
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  concept being a car biannual que al Hasid.
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  This is the closing of the different medal of Hasid.
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  So the closing medal of Hasid. The thing to keep in mind is how
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  much does your Jew meter run? How much do you care about other
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  Jews? How much is the pain you when
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  they're going through suffering? How much does it make you happy
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  when you're seen as successful? This should be our driving
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  force. We should pray for them, we
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  should care for them, we should dedicate to them.
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  It should be our AMITA all right.
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  Same thing as a glatify and glatify as that person passes
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  away in between different cities, we blame the most close,
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  the closest city for not walking the person out.
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  Very similar theme we have to be at our old times, pulling for
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  the Jewish people as a whole. They'll be thinking about them,
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  caring about them, and that makes you more of a Hassid.
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  Like we said, a leader is someone who prays for them,
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  right? So the overall theme of a
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  Hassidou that we did over the last couple of weeks, 1 you will
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  pull for Hashem. You care about kiyushashem.
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  What does kihushashem doing me? It means that you care.
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  It means he dedicated to God's world.
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  This should be our mindset. And then you move on to this.
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  They care about God's world and he cared about his people.
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  That's all our theme. Our feeling should be appealing
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  for the Jewish people the whole time and how to feel out in the
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  way we spend, the way we think when we watch the news should
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  always be our mindset. How much are the Jewish people
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  and how much are they succeeding to the situation or having the
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  opposite? That's it.
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  That's a that's our obligation. Now, how does it play out?
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  Real life, watching the news, going to Israel, all these
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  different things in your mind, you see suffering and bothers
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  you, you see success makes it happen as I did.
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  All right, So what are the three ones?
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  These are me thought they will stop.
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  It's just go on to the next idea, page 415 trying to open
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  this up and then we'll continue more tomorrow.
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  The issue is being a Khasi, this media of caring about these
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  different things. The biggest problem you have is
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  balance. Balance.
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  How far do you go in this? All right, let's take this
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  example for now. He says they care about the Jews
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  he's supposed to pull for them and such.
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  How far do you go in this media, which means, do you give up your
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  time for the Jewish people? Do you give up your family times
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  for the Jews? Do you give a big value of money
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  for those people because you're pulling for them, right?
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  How do you balance being a Hasid?
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  Let's go even further. Let's say you have certain
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  values, right? Certain values they believe in,
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  and these Jews that you're pulling for are not following
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  your values or your way of life. Do you still pull for them just
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  the same, right? Does it matter to you?
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  Do you say there's limits? How does this work?
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  It's a challenge. As much as a person wants to be
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  a Hasid, they also have to figure out the biggest issue is
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  the balance that they have and being this dedicated person.
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  They're pulling Father Jews. They're worrying about them,
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  they're worrying about cavochomayim.
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  How much time do you put into this?
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  All these things are in question.
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  All right, and follow me at this point.
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  I see it inside Marcia Sarik Lavellata, where a person has to
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  analyze is whom Ishka Hasidutazi, a balance, Moenjan
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  Ikrem, old Moors. One of the hardest things to do
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  is to rebalance of being a Hasid.
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  It's very hard to be a very pious person and to figure out
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  my balance is very strong when it comes to you know, swaying
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  your balance and being a Hasid. I can't inside Second, I told
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  Atsuma we're in great danger. There are many good things that
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  yet said I tells you don't get involved, right, Don't go down
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  that road. It's not good for you.
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  It's a good thing, but yet said I convinced you otherwise.
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  It's a it's a Medav jacidut in this area.
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  I could be a very pious person, right.
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  How much should a person care about certain things going on in
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  Israel? Flat out, how much should you
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  care, right? Should you be involved in a
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  hassle mission? Should you be involved in
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  certain things? If you can?
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  If you could All in the time or not all in but.
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  You can't give up your life for it.
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  It's a challenge on no one in I will pull if we're thinking like
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  I was thinking it wasn't interesting right.
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  They were post October 7th to a lot of trips and the trips were
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  somewhat Hashem missing trips. Right now there are no no more
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  any trips. So I was thinking about it.
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  It's just obviously the war is kind of ended.
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  It is because the inspiration is just, you know, God fades like
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  everything else fades. Or is it because the need is
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  gone? I don't know if the need is
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  gone. I'm sure the need is probably
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  still there somewhere, right? Those families probably are
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  still going through those. Things the injured people are
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  much worse off than the than the, you know, people that
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  passed. I understand.
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  I can imagine so. My question always that people
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  don't have submissions in New York when you live here.
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  Right, It's fair. It's.
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  Just gone to Israel. Do it.
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  It's just like it's fake. Yeah, it's fake, but it's also
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  something that pulls you, I hope.
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  It gets fake. But again, David, these are all
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  things that you have to be on your balance, some people.
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  I don't. I don't think so.
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  Well, why would it be fake? First of all, the truth is in
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  our community, thank God a million times you have a face or
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  deal with that many people dealing with this kind of
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  craziness as they are over there.
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  You have people, many, many, many people who are going
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  through disasters in such a world over this different world.
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  And there's a poll to Israel and everything else.
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  So just to bring out this point, how do you know how much you
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  should be involved in such as a mission?
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  Should you be dedicating a lot of your time, should be getting
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  on a plan and going and doing trips all the time?
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  Just an example. And that's an, that's an
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  example. It's a very big poll.
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  The poll of Avati still pulls you through these situations all
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  the time. And then you have the balance
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  question. My family, my money, my
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  community, all these everything's at, you know, so
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  here. My, at least I rattled as a
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  whole from from a Hassid perspective, a lot of our
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  organizations that usually get a lot of money got hit.
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  Yeah, I think at that point I think it passed a limit.
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  When the guy says I just gave $20,000 to Israel, I can't give
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  you anything, right. So I can't go there.
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  It could be supplemental, you know, but it can't be instead,
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  right, right, You know, so that that and I think people will be
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  in the beginning just like so you were praying thing.
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  For sure, you know, OK. But now that I bought this sale,
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  I was pulling you, which is a certain discern.
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  I don't know how to explain. I can't explain to myself a
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  certain emotion you feel when it comes to what's going on in
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  Israel. It's just something that pulls
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  you. You hear about something that
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  goes on in, I don't know, barbaric Williamsburg even.
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  And you can't remember that they're not out.
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  Our families are our people. Israel also not our families are
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  our people. He's not in that polls.
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  You can't explain it. And there's Ava there.
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  There's a poll there. What is it?
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  I don't know. It's got nothing to do with even
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  political angle. It's simply a poll.
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  The land. I don't know what it is you're
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  delivering. Food for Shabbat and things
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  like. That right, right.
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  There's there's a tomahawk away in Borough Park in Lakewood and
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  wherever else maybe that is she has, we do things for as she has
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  in Israel too, right. We don't differentiate
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  everything that she has inside the in Israel.
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  It's not about the type. It's something about the poem
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  and there's Arvada. It's a beautiful thing.
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  We're, we're, we're blessed with the feeling of the pole that
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  pulls us there. It's a good thing overall, it's
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  a strongly dull. But then you have the Hasid
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  question, which is where's my balance?
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  How am I overdoing it? Should I be always going there
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  or always being dedicated to that?
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  Just give me an example. There's a million examples that
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  come to being a Hasid. You have to figure out your
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  balance and figure out what pulls you.
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  But obviously you could say you can't play for your family, you
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  come from the Islamic community. You have to have these different
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  things, but all these different areas.
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  I'll give you another example. What's extreme?
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  Kedusha Hashem, right? So you and I know Kedusha Hashem
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  is a very simple me da, don't you know, yell on the street and
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  don't cut someone off. But sometime people believe,
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  right? It's true.
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  It's very collusion. But sometimes people believe.
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  And I'll give you a very extreme opinion is to bring it out.
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  When people protest about certain things, in their minds
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  they're protesting. I'm not talking about any
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  specific examples. They're protesting in their mind
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  on behalf of Kedushesha. Reality, any of these things
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  that they go out there in the street and hold those protests
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  on behalf of Kedushesha. Now many people will look at
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  that and say that it's always a Khalushan.
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  I understand, I'm aware. As I said, they're Mida and
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  their mindset, they're standing up and say, Khashan, how do you
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  know the balance? Let's say you're not a camp, how
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  do they know their balance? You might say that, but they
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  might say their values are risk. Again, this is something that
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  requires very, very significant balance and weigh and that is
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  why the average person doesn't do these things because they
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  don't know the balance. I'm talking about.
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  Even in those camps, the average person doesn't get involved
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  because they really don't know the balance.
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  I know some of the people that were from the most extreme of
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  those circles and they'll never show up by any of these protests
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  ever 'cause they say I don't know when it's coming from my
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  Yitzaharah, when it's coming from my Yitzahar talk.
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  Which means I don't know why I'm being full pulled, 'cause I want
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  to fight or I'm being pulled 'cause I have a belief.
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  All these things. When you go extremes, I'm
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  talking about extreme headset, even extreme protests,
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  extremists extreme that I gave you two sides of Israel.
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  Basically, when you go extremes, you need to know what's pulling
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  it and you need to figure out your balance.
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  He says the Yitzharah sometimes tell you ignore, and then it
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  said suddenly it's telling you to get too involved and you need
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  to know where it's coming from here to identify your basic
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  balance. And if you do that, you can do
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  the right thing. If not, we can sometimes be
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  pulled too far to the extreme, as you see.
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  And I see we look at people and you say, where'd that guy get
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  that? Where does he think that that's
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  related to the Torah, to that? Where does he think that?
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  All right, How? It cannot be Jewish?
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  What are you doing? That isn't every community
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  leader guilty of this like even let's say a person like you.
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  Yeah, you're giving up so much of your life to be our leader
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  here, you know, as if he father did the same thing.
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  The head of people Holim. Yeah, it's a constant sacrifice
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  of giving up. But even PTA presidents.
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  I remember my ripe was that it was 2 years of, you know, not
• 17:23
  right. Homeless.
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  Yeah, So what, how how does those jobs get done if someone
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  doesn't give one of their. OK, so it's $1,000,000 question
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  and I've been trying to figure that question for a bunch of
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  years now. And the symbol, the simple
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  answer is to for sure the white with the SRA.
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  The simple answer is, is that you have to figure out the
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  balance. And just because you're highly
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  motivated and you're doing, doing, doing, doing, it's not
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  always a good thing. That's a real answer.
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  And real people, the original real leaders had the call.
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  First of all, a lot of them, their children did not work out
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  that well. A lot of it's because of I'm
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  going because they were not around.
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  That's the reality. I mean, do you have from the
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  time they get mad up all the way down to to our last generation,
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  some of the children do not work out the way they want the
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  parents. And it's very much because the
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  parents were more worried about the neighbor than they were
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  about them. When children is the nature of
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  the business, that's a problem. All right.
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  And I'm finding out that's a problem and I'm trying to very
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  much shifting away from that model in my mind at least.
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  Maybe in reality will come one day.
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  The truth is that the real leaders did that.
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  They were able to pay out the balance today because many
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  leaders are so highly motivated and maybe even a little
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  competitive and maybe even a little bit believing that unless
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  they're all in, the whole thing's going to crumble, are
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  facing a much harder task, much harder task today.
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  And it's a very difficult balance, to be real, with my
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  father's time, He said if I was heavily involved, he was also
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  heavily personal, kept a lot of time to himself and a lot of
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  time for his family. So that was much more doable.
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  Today, a rabbi isn't much harder than my father's time, 10 times
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  harder in a certain sense. And they're much better.
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  You stay on and they have to figure out.
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  And a lot of them have a difficulty today, right Right
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  now as we speak. A lot of them have this struggle
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  in front of their face and it's hurting them.
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  And a lot of them figure it out. You need to be honestly, you
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  need to ignore the noise, you need to say at times my family
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  only. I need to figure out that
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  balance and yes, say no to other things also.
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  You could be all in. With the shul, whatever.
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  But to be yeah, zip play on something else that's not waste
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  your time. So one of my big things were
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  exactly 1 of the rabbis told me when asking this question
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  exactly. They told me anything that
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  doesn't play into what you're doing, don't do.
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  Which means if you're going to give a class or something
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  somewhere else doesn't affect your Congress and stuff like
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  that, this is their answer. Don't do it because someone else
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  can do it. That doesn't mean you turn
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  everything down, but it means you take your responsibility and
• 19:59
  you take it all the way. You don't do things that are not
• 20:02
  really responsible. That's a vague answer.
• 20:04
  It's all I answer. Rabbis, all committees are
• 20:06
  responsible. It's different, hey?
• 20:08
  Right, if you're doing the school and the school and the
• 20:10
  camp, but the thing eventually somebody.
• 20:12
  'S going to get, that's for sure.
• 20:14
  That doesn't work. I haven't seen it work.
• 20:16
  Very difficult for it to work unless you're a very good
• 20:18
  delegator, which again, so then you're just ACEO.
• 20:20
  And I mean, it's a different thing, but it's a hard question
• 20:23
  to answer. But that's what the answer is.
• 20:24
  You have to figure out the balance.
• 20:25
  That's what this is I have to struggle with.
• 20:27
  And the biggest thing, the biggest line you read over here
• 20:29
  is you don't know. When I see it's a hurrah.
• 20:33
  When I see it's a TOF. You don't know.
• 20:35
  You're not sure when it's pulling you, What's pulling you,
• 20:38
  you can't tell. I'll tell you right now about
• 20:40
  the recording. I'm not recording.
• 20:41
  I'm right now dealing with this struggle and I can't figure out
• 20:44
  the answer. And I'm probably going to make
• 20:45
  an answer. I don't know if it's a good one.
• 20:47
  I have next week about mitzvah of the Conagon and if I'm
• 20:51
  mitzvah, my brother is making about mitzvah now in Israel.
• 20:55
  They're both in it. Then one Monday, one Thursday,
• 20:57
  right. Wow.
• 20:59
  OK, now I'm up in there was paying for my flight or not?
• 21:02
  That's not the question. It doesn't matter to me.
• 21:04
  It's more about do you go? Do you not go in session?
• 21:08
  Why not go? Or my kids have school.
• 21:09
  So I'm not going with my kids part no one.
• 21:12
  I don't like to go over without my kids, especially the all
• 21:14
  little kids. Difficult Part 2 Part 3 is I
• 21:18
  have Koval, I have a Shima and I feel extremely where's the land
• 21:23
  is right. They say you can I displace the
• 21:24
  land is right and I personally feel extremely guilty is how it
• 21:28
  works. I feel very guilty when I leave
• 21:31
  Koval. I can't do it.
• 21:32
  I cannot just sway my mate and nature is so I have these two
• 21:35
  things in front of me. Do you go?
• 21:36
  Do you not go? Do you go enhances all of.
• 21:38
  That huh? We're allowed to take the kids
• 21:39
  out of school for Israel early? You let her do everything for
• 21:42
  Israel, so it just overrides everything.
• 21:45
  Be uh, he's welcoming me. Oh, he's like at school and do
• 21:48
  that. It was fun out, but that's
• 21:51
  seriously I did. You can't get back for Shabbat.
• 21:54
  I can get back here. I could, but then it's half the
• 21:57
  vomits for over Shabbat. It's part of the thing.
• 22:00
  So this is my thing back and forth, back and forth.
• 22:03
  What's here said? What's here to talk that have
• 22:06
  been taught recharging. Am I going to recharge?
• 22:09
  I'm not going to recharge. Aren't you busy with my missus
• 22:11
  all day long? Right.
• 22:12
  No party. That's so that becomes a thing.
• 22:14
  We're dealing with it with rabbi and another shul that I was
• 22:17
  involved in. And when is the rabbi allowed to
• 22:20
  go? When is the rabbi should go?
• 22:22
  Is he pick and choose? Right.
• 22:24
  And no, it ends up happening with me personally because I'm
• 22:27
  not a big vacationer person. I don't like vacation.
• 22:30
  I only like going to Israel, Technis, people.
• 22:32
  I end up never going, right? Everyone says go, but the
• 22:35
  reality is and then do it now I got to push my wife.
• 22:38
  Should I push? So this is the balance.
• 22:41
  She likes to go. She likes to go when she's
• 22:43
  there. I was like to pick up a lead a
• 22:46
  couple of times that I've gone, couple of times that I've gone.
• 22:49
  I made a decision. Literally, I'm like you the
• 22:52
  night before, booked a flight for tomorrow, kind of playing a
• 22:56
  MF, All right, Might be double the price, but I didn't hear it.
• 23:00
  That's the best way. Just 'cause there's no I'm
• 23:02
  trying. To think about it.
• 23:04
  The only thing is there's a, there's a beauty and
• 23:05
  anticipation, the excitement, all that stuff.
• 23:08
  And you know, but my point is this right here is a clear
• 23:10
  balance of it's a, it's a top. And I don't know the answer.
• 23:13
  I, I know I'm leaning probably not to go, but I, I, but you
• 23:17
  said, ah, it's not all. Maybe I'll, you don't need me to
• 23:20
  go. And we're just committed myself.
• 23:22
  I should go and I'll really make a difference on the trip.
• 23:24
  All these things are in your head.
• 23:25
  They have a great day. This is your question, right?
• 23:29
  How many times have you fallen somewhere and you weren't sure
• 23:31
  you should go there or not? How many times should I go
• 23:34
  through this or not go through this?
• 23:36
  Should I go to that wedding? Should I not go to the wedding?
• 23:37
  But. Usually, let's say it's happened
• 23:39
  to me, let's have to go pay with specs.
• 23:41
  Yeah, usually you go and you say, wow, it's good art.
• 23:45
  Yeah. Hoping I would think that would
• 23:48
  be the same in this case. But it just depends on what side
• 23:53
  of the fence, you know, you want to sit on, You know, do you want
• 23:57
  to be like now? Like not like martyr, but like
• 24:03
  what? You know, like that mindset,
• 24:04
  like I don't do that. Oh, so part of my big thing is
• 24:07
  this part of I'm telling you, it's part of my big thing is I,
• 24:11
  I committed commitment at the beginning of the rabbit
• 24:13
  business. Sorry, commitments I made, as
• 24:15
  you can tell one of them was yesterday.
• 24:17
  I'm never going to, I'm never going to cave to the
• 24:21
  intercession field. You know, the air that
• 24:24
  everyone's going away. So you got it was somewhere I
• 24:27
  don't know people, they might just go over some some people
• 24:29
  say that he's not going to pray in the shul because it's in
• 24:32
  session. I'm not going for that.
• 24:33
  I just can't do that. All right, our father didn't do
• 24:36
  that. I agree with that pattern.
• 24:38
  So then you don't want to get it.
• 24:39
  But maybe I have kidding. This is a Met the Strolls that's
• 24:42
  going right now this. Is the SIM card of a family
• 24:45
  member. So yeah, but it's not, it's not
• 24:47
  the type of I'm it's the way they're going to bring where all
• 24:50
  the brothers are coming and stuff like, you know, I mean,
• 24:52
  it's not the type, it's a it's a heck, I am.
• 24:53
  It's small. You're right.
• 24:55
  It's something, it's nice thing, but these are the new way.
• 24:59
  It can't figure out the balance and I'm not sure.
• 25:02
  I go back and forth in my mind. Last night I went to sleep.
• 25:04
  I said Nah, mix, you go bye.