Latest / Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash / #152 We'd Like To Make A Formal Apology

Transcript

#152 We'd Like To Make A Formal Apology · Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: You didn't notice of my work outside on the patio
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: out there.
• 0:03
  Speaker 2: I haven't been out there, yeah, mate, don't know what.
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: Got over me, but I saw some marks on the
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: Papersny I got the gurnie. Fucking how good is it? Gurny? Also?
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: Can I borrow it? Actually?
• 0:15
  Speaker 3: My driveway so slippery. The kids are slipping and sliding
• 0:19
  Speaker 3: down my driveway.
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: What's mine is yours? Also, when you're gurneying, it's very dangerous.
• 0:24
  Speaker 3: Kids.
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: Stay away, mate, I had two hours free from the kids.
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: But how are your forearms?
• 0:31
  Speaker 3: Oh? Yeah, I noticed popeye.
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: Welcome back to two notting dads. I'm Mattie Jay and
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: I'm Ash. And this is a podcast all about parenting.
• 0:56
  Speaker 3: It is the good, it is the bad and the relatable,
• 0:58
  Speaker 3: and it is not about giving advice because Ash and
• 1:01
  Speaker 3: I are very dumb.
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: Well said.
• 1:04
  Speaker 3: I couldn't have said it better myself, and I had
• 1:06
  Speaker 3: a little tickle in my throat.
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: That's no good.
• 1:09
  Speaker 2: I had an IV yesterday, so I'm I'm flye.
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: What were you injecting into yourself?
• 1:18
  Speaker 3: Just just just heroin? It's as usual. Now let's move
• 1:22
  Speaker 3: on from that. We do have we do have something
• 1:25
  Speaker 3: that we need to talk about it's pressing. What's that
• 1:27
  Speaker 3: is that there was a technical issue, the big technical issue.
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: We had a few people in the Facebook group being like,
• 1:36
  Speaker 1: what the hell is going on? And poor Jess, who
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: was in Japan had to come back and save the day.
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: She flew back really quick. We were like sorry about
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: the technical error, and people were like, we know, we
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: know what's happened, but I what happened? Man? You tell
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: I actually want to defend myself. You tell me what
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: you think happened. And I've had a few weeks now,
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: back to back where I revealed information which I wasn't
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: meant to reveal, the first one being the name of
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: our child, shout out.
• 2:07
  Speaker 2: To Poppy's unborn Poppy yet to be born.
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: And then apparently I don't remember doing this. That starts
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: the sentence with a para. Well, it was first brought
• 2:22
  Speaker 1: to my attention whilst I was in a gojak, which
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: is a taxi in Ballei. I was in the front
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: seat and Laura sit me behind me, taps me on
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: the shoulder. This is on a Wednesday, the day which
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: our podcast comes out, and she says, did you mention
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: that Britt was getting married in Bali and I was like, no, no,
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: I don't recall. I was like, I would definitely not
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: do that, did I? And then I was like my
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: initial reaction was just no, like Blake.
• 2:57
  Speaker 3: Oh yeah, you got her back yourself, Yeah you've got
• 3:00
  Speaker 3: even though you're like I'm not sure, You've still got
• 3:03
  Speaker 3: to be like, I definitely didn't do that. So just
• 3:05
  Speaker 3: in case you definitely didn't do that, you're like to.
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: And I was like that was close. And then Laura
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: was like, we've just had a couple of people message
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: us saying that they heard that BRIT's getting married from
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: your podcast.
• 3:20
  Speaker 3: And I was like, the Lifers were a little bit
• 3:23
  Speaker 3: off it because they feel like far part of the fart.
• 3:26
  Speaker 3: I feel like part of the family, feel like part
• 3:28
  Speaker 3: of the family over there at Life. I'm cut and
• 3:31
  Speaker 3: then we've.
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: Gone, You've gone.
• 3:34
  Speaker 3: I'm not taking any I was like, my message to
• 3:37
  Speaker 3: Laura was like, we'll do whatever it takes.
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: Was it me or was it you? I think it
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: was a combination. Was it who was it? I think
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: I don't think it was me. I think I was
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: that was you. It was definitely no.
• 3:49
  Speaker 3: I had mentioned it previously, but not as much detail
• 3:54
  Speaker 3: as you bullshit. We have evidence. Please play the tape.
• 3:58
  Speaker 3: Play the tape for the man.
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: Put forward the case to not bring the kids to Bali. Yeah,
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: because you're going for a special going for its wedding
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: over Bali. I think I think that's public. This would
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: be out while time's over. Yeah, actually will be good one, Matt,
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: good one. That's Ai. That is a I. I've been framed.
• 4:25
  Speaker 3: I've put that in there to frame you. I just
• 4:27
  Speaker 3: wanted to ruffle the feathers a little bit. Okay, No
• 4:30
  Speaker 3: I didn't. You just said that all on your right.
• 4:32
  Speaker 3: But it's not the first time we mentioned it. I'm
• 4:34
  Speaker 3: certain that we should we.
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: Shut the fuck up. Did we mention it? What are
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: you doing? I'm trying to get you more. Okay. It
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: humors me when you're in trouble and it's not me, because.
• 4:46
  Speaker 3: To be quite honest, I thought it would be me
• 4:49
  Speaker 3: that would suck up most things.
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: Why did I do that?
• 4:52
  Speaker 3: I think I thought everyone knew that I was going
• 4:56
  Speaker 3: to Balley, right, people I knew.
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: People I don't know. I don't know.
• 5:01
  Speaker 3: It's the world's worst kept secret. Like we all knew
• 5:05
  Speaker 3: it was getting married. Like when an influence is like
• 5:08
  Speaker 3: I got something big coming. People are like, we don't care,
• 5:11
  Speaker 3: just when it's done, tell us. Yeah, Like it was
• 5:13
  Speaker 3: like everyone went quiet on socials.
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: Where is everyone? So? I do want to apologize to
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: brit for potentially destroying the surprise. I have to say it,
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: but just play along with me. We whoa. We are
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: so sorry for what we've done.
• 5:37
  Speaker 2: I'm sorry that Matt, sorry that you're.
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: You're making this the worst apology. We are sorry. Look,
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: if I wasn't sorry, I wouldn't have said.
• 5:46
  Speaker 3: To Laura or I said to Jess with Laura in
• 5:49
  Speaker 3: the same group conversation.
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: That's how that works.
• 5:52
  Speaker 2: Do whatever Laura would like us to do, do whatever
• 5:54
  Speaker 2: it takes.
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: That's how sorry. And Jess, thank you to you for
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: jumping on this situation quickly in Japan on your holiday
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: with terrible time to jump back at work. We apologize again.
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: We apologize for that ashn I chilling voices, but also
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: do just want to say not that we would ever
• 6:12
  Speaker 1: want to do this again. It was purely an accident.
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: But those download numbers through.
• 6:16
  Speaker 3: The Wow, we need more inside information WikiLeaks.
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: Yeah so, and also thanks to the listeners as well,
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: because I think there was a few people in the
• 6:29
  Speaker 1: Facebook group as well. When I said it's a technical problem,
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: they were like.
• 6:32
  Speaker 3: Sure, sure, mate, technically you fucked up. And they didn't
• 6:38
  Speaker 3: ruin the surprise.
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: Oh thank you guys. And you know I had to.
• 6:43
  Speaker 1: I was upset. I was upset, you know, to Laura.
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: You know, I had to like, oh my god, sorry.
• 6:51
  Speaker 3: And I even sent you an encouraging message. It's been like,
• 6:54
  Speaker 3: it's all good, bro. People make mistakes.
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: Meanwhile, I'm like, what an idiot? How was Let's move on?
• 7:01
  Speaker 3: So you went to Bali for a wedding of we
• 7:04
  Speaker 3: allowed to talk about it now Briss's wedding, which is
• 7:08
  Speaker 3: Laura's co host on Life on Cut.
• 7:10
  Speaker 2: And Laura Laura, Laura is your current.
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: Wife, beautiful wife, Laura. She was actually already in Bali
• 7:19
  Speaker 1: for work for work, and so I was joining her,
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: flying over with the kids. And there are lots of
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: options on solo with the kids. And you're a good dad,
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: thank you. You are one in a million. And these
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: decisions what flight to book? These are decisions that I
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: agonize over. Okay, okay, because the option was ash do
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: I fly do go quanas? Nice plane? You get food?
• 7:47
  Speaker 3: Issue is is she is the flight arrives quite late.
• 7:52
  Speaker 3: You're getting into Bali at lad ten eleven Jetstar version.
• 7:56
  Speaker 3: They're all the same. You get them too late. So
• 7:58
  Speaker 3: by the time you go through customs, once you get
• 8:01
  Speaker 3: in the taxi.
• 8:03
  Speaker 2: There is a six am Jet Stuff flight.
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: Too early.
• 8:07
  Speaker 3: Early there is a ten o'clock Garuda flight. There was
• 8:11
  Speaker 3: a ten o'clock.
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: I rocked up. This is on my socials, but I
• 8:16
  Speaker 1: rocked up and they were like, flights canceled. That fucks
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: fucking ran. I ran. They said, if you don't want
• 8:22
  Speaker 1: to accept a new flight, which is tomorrow morning, you
• 8:25
  Speaker 1: can get a full refund. So I knew there was
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: a Virgin flight in the afternoon. I fucking sprinted. I
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: was like Usain Bolt across the airport because Virgin was
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: at one end, Garuda was the other. I had Marley
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: and Lola under both arms. I get to Virgin. There's
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: no one there except for six women. Oh and then
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: as I get to that checking desk, they say, I
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: cannot believe we just got the last seats on that flight.
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: And they turn around and I just go, are you
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: fucking kidding? I shouldn't have sworn?
• 8:57
  Speaker 3: And Marley and Lola were like, are we not going
• 8:59
  Speaker 3: to see mummy and I'm like no, because they booked
• 9:02
  Speaker 3: the last tickets. Did one of those one of those
• 9:05
  Speaker 3: women be like at least show some sort of empathy,
• 9:08
  Speaker 3: you know where they were they were, they were like
• 9:10
  Speaker 3: it was it was a week like.
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: They were. I could tell. I looked in their eyes
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: and they were upset that they had Because I'm standing
• 9:19
  Speaker 1: there with my two children. They're both balling, being.
• 9:21
  Speaker 3: Like, we're not going to go on holiday and I'm like, no,
• 9:23
  Speaker 3: we're not, because they have ruined it for us.
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: Anyway. And then do you know what? Do you know
• 9:31
  Speaker 1: what made matters worse? When I got home, I had
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: to get back in the taxi, had to get home.
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: The taxi driver was like, oh, the card machine's not working,
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: and so I tapped again and he's like, no, it
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: didn't work. Tap again. I got charged five times my
• 9:46
  Speaker 1: fucking time. He's gotcha. I want one of those ATM machines,
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: just walk around town with it. What do you mean?
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: I looked at my statement and I remember the time
• 9:55
  Speaker 1: I was like, I think I think you've charged me.
• 9:59
  Speaker 1: It's gone through, guys. Now it hasn't gone through. It's
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: fled the country. Now, I mean anyway. So then the
• 10:03
  Speaker 1: next morning was up at three am back to Garuda.
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: Long story short. I don't want to go on about,
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: you know, my situation. But the computers were down. Oh
• 10:12
  Speaker 1: my god, it's a two hour wait. There's a small
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: chance ash that I went into the business line.
• 10:20
  Speaker 3: To skip the queue a little bit. Why were you
• 10:28
  Speaker 3: in business, don't you?
• 10:29
  Speaker 1: Dad? No, but don't wink at me. The wait was
• 10:34
  Speaker 1: very long, okay, I would I'm with two kids. They
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: had to go to the toilet, so I had to
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: leave the queue to go to the toilet. And I thought,
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: I'm not going to try and weed the my way
• 10:44
  Speaker 1: back like halfway into the queue.
• 10:46
  Speaker 3: So I just jumped into the business queue and yeah, great,
• 10:49
  Speaker 3: how did that go? It's great, really good. You skipped
• 10:51
  Speaker 3: the whole line.
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: Yes, I I didn't want to. I didn't want to
• 10:56
  Speaker 1: go on too much about like that line at the
• 10:58
  Speaker 1: checking desk, because people like you were straight to the front.
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: I don't condone. It worked. It did like it, you know,
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: it worked. I don't want to.
• 11:07
  Speaker 3: Actually, I've got a little hack fee now. Actually, now
• 11:10
  Speaker 3: let's just jog my memory. I was coming back from
• 11:14
  Speaker 3: what was I going back from Brisbane? And you know
• 11:16
  Speaker 3: when you get to security and the normal line Love Brisbane,
• 11:21
  Speaker 3: and then the priority line. Who I was with Matt Veach,
• 11:26
  Speaker 3: you're on your trouble here. If they figure you out,
• 11:29
  Speaker 3: you could just go in the priority line because they
• 11:31
  Speaker 3: don't actually check your boarding paths until you're scanning onto
• 11:34
  Speaker 3: the plane.
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: No, I've been I have tried to jump into the
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: primary line and they've checked my boarding past and said no,
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: oh that's right. We got yelled at that time. Yeah
• 11:41
  Speaker 1: we got yeah, yes, we take all of that back. Yeah,
• 11:44
  Speaker 1: but it'll worked this time.
• 11:45
  Speaker 3: But so you went straight to the front of the line,
• 11:47
  Speaker 3: all gravy, straight through.
• 11:49
  Speaker 1: Let's just focus on the fact that, you know, I
• 11:53
  Speaker 1: had two kids by myself. Yeah, and the grid of
• 11:56
  Speaker 1: flight was good. My mom was like, who are you
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: flying with Garuda? They had a crash last month for
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: people died.
• 12:03
  Speaker 3: They had one of the worst track records of plane
• 12:06
  Speaker 3: crashes out of all our lines.
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: It's like I just changed it to air Asia. I
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: was like, why the fuck are you telling me this? Nan,
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: my mum the world's biggest warrior. Oh yeah, but we
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: got there and and my sister actually said, you just
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: stopped complaining because I did a video we got were
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: a complaint. We're in a villa and there was construction.
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: The pool and restaurant was being built next door. We
• 12:27
  Speaker 1: were like the last villa next to the construction site.
• 12:30
  Speaker 1: And they're like, there's a bit of noise, just a bit.
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: There was jack hammering every and there's.
• 12:35
  Speaker 2: No sound insulation, bali whatsoever.
• 12:38
  Speaker 1: Those rooms are.
• 12:39
  Speaker 3: Just just mate like there's like no in or or
• 12:43
  Speaker 3: outer wall.
• 12:44
  Speaker 1: It's just the way it is.
• 12:45
  Speaker 3: There was a nightmare, but just quickly with the going
• 12:47
  Speaker 3: to the bathroom with both you had both kids and
• 12:49
  Speaker 3: you're the only parent. I think it's really funny when
• 12:51
  Speaker 3: I have to go to the bathroom and I have
• 12:52
  Speaker 3: to drag them along with me. It was like you
• 12:54
  Speaker 3: stand there while I go to the bathroom on the plane, No,
• 12:57
  Speaker 3: just it just wherever you with both kids on time
• 13:00
  Speaker 3: and you have to wait for a change and the
• 13:03
  Speaker 3: men's toilets sucky. Come in there and they're like his
• 13:06
  Speaker 3: place stinks.
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, yeah, up against the walls, Like what's up
• 13:09
  Speaker 1: on the floor on the plane. If you've flown with
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: both kids, have you done that before?
• 13:17
  Speaker 3: Oh my god alone, Oh my god, when would I
• 13:21
  Speaker 3: have had to do that you tell me, bro, well,
• 13:24
  Speaker 3: my wife doesn't work overseas.
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: Sometimes you've never flown solo with both kids?
• 13:29
  Speaker 3: No, oh, I feel like you just This is the
• 13:33
  Speaker 3: equivalent of a dad saying I've never changed an happy No,
• 13:36
  Speaker 3: it's not whoa whoa you're about dad, I'm not part
• 13:40
  Speaker 3: of the three percent.
• 13:42
  Speaker 1: Yes, you know, I'm not. You live, I'm gonna do.
• 13:47
  Speaker 2: I'm flying this afternoon alone.
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: Just bring the kids. The most stressful moment ash on
• 13:54
  Speaker 1: those flights, okay, is when you have to go to
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: the toilet. I had to do a.
• 14:01
  Speaker 3: Yeah, and I also I got they moved my flight
• 14:06
  Speaker 3: and I it was weird because I talked about the
• 14:09
  Speaker 3: sitting arrangement, Oh yeah, And I was like, do you
• 14:11
  Speaker 3: go like, because Garuda is two four and two, do
• 14:13
  Speaker 3: you go four in the middle? And I was like,
• 14:14
  Speaker 3: wouldn't it be funny if you had two and like
• 14:17
  Speaker 3: the window aisle and then you're then across the other aisle.
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: And they must have heard me. That's the seats that
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: we got. I couldn't move my seats. They were like,
• 14:26
  Speaker 1: here's your seats and I was like, oh, I'm separate
• 14:28
  Speaker 1: to the kids, and they were like fuck fuck ed
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: you're like I was, it was. It was anyone wondering terrible.
• 14:36
  Speaker 2: Oh, because they're just doing whatever they like over there.
• 14:38
  Speaker 3: And Lola has a little like screen in front of
• 14:40
  Speaker 3: her seat and she's like, oh, the screen's broken, and
• 14:42
  Speaker 3: you're like God, reaching over and trying to help her out.
• 14:45
  Speaker 1: But yeah. Going then to the toilet and like trying
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: to be as quick in the fishing as.
• 14:50
  Speaker 2: You can, leave the door open, like holding it open,
• 14:56
  Speaker 2: then coming.
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: Back and being like will they still be there?
• 14:59
  Speaker 3: Oh?
• 14:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah, because like they're unsupervised. A lady rode in and
• 15:03
  Speaker 1: was like she was flying with her daughter. Her daughter
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: was asleep. She went to the toilet and the daughter
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: woke up and thought the plane had landed. New people
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: had gotten on and woke up and was like, it's
• 15:17
  Speaker 1: like a home alone situation. But we made it there. Yes,
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: little bit of noise, but it was. It was a
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: lovely holiday, a lovely wedding as well. Thankfully no paparazzi
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: had rocked up and didn't get gay crashed by Life
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: on Cut fans who knew where it was. It was great.
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: That's good.
• 15:35
  Speaker 2: That's good Prime time for Bali too, isn't that right now?
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: Lovely busy, lovely fuck did the traffic it was graffic
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: and BALI don't get me started. That's brutal. Shout out
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: to Yanni a babysitter. Shout out to Yanni, nanny, sorry, nanny.
• 15:50
  Speaker 2: I'd love to bring them back and just have the weird.
• 15:52
  Speaker 1: Laura and I were like, could we wed in touch
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: with immigration?
• 15:56
  Speaker 3: Have you?
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: Yanni was like, oh, so, who's your nanny back home
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: in Australia. You are, here's a one way ticket to Australia.
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: It was very, very sad to wave goodbye to you
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: and returning back to this fucking hell whole of the city.
• 16:15
  Speaker 1: It's good to have you back. It is cold.
• 16:17
  Speaker 3: It is cold here compared to Barley wearing a beanie.
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: I know, dude, like like John Butler, treo over here,
• 16:25
  Speaker 1: thank you. I don't know that's but there's things you've missed.
• 16:29
  Speaker 1: There's things you've missed.
• 16:30
  Speaker 3: Around here that I want to enlighten you about. Go on, Okay.
• 16:35
  Speaker 3: The first one is I think I think my I'm
• 16:40
  Speaker 3: calling Macy the Silent Assassin. Yes, she's sort of getting
• 16:43
  Speaker 3: to that age now where she's halfway through three and
• 16:47
  Speaker 3: she's a bit of a threeen Ager three is the toughest,
• 16:49
  Speaker 3: say three ager. Yeah, yeah, she's really quiet, as we know.
• 16:54
  Speaker 3: But that's a problem because she seems to be always
• 16:56
  Speaker 3: up to no good.
• 16:57
  Speaker 1: But silently. And I'm concerned because.
• 17:01
  Speaker 3: Oscar easy easy to figure out what he's doing because
• 17:05
  Speaker 3: he doesn't stop yapping. So he's committing a crime and
• 17:09
  Speaker 3: someone okay, here we go. If someone's committing a crime
• 17:11
  Speaker 3: and they haven't stopped talking to through the whole crime,
• 17:14
  Speaker 3: it's Oscar, okay, because he doesn't shut up.
• 17:17
  Speaker 1: May see not so much.
• 17:19
  Speaker 2: You sort of walk in on her doing devious things
• 17:21
  Speaker 2: all the time.
• 17:23
  Speaker 3: And I kept walking around the house and finding headless
• 17:27
  Speaker 3: lego men hear me out weird. Yeah, at first I
• 17:32
  Speaker 3: was like, there's a lego body just on the floor.
• 17:36
  Speaker 2: That's not a crime scene, or is it?
• 17:39
  Speaker 3: And I kept finding them all over the place, to
• 17:42
  Speaker 3: the point where I had torsos no heads, that's all.
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: Through the house. The dog.
• 17:50
  Speaker 3: Maybe I thought maybe they're just I don't know, maybe
• 17:54
  Speaker 3: King George lives here. I don't know, like fuck, like
• 17:57
  Speaker 3: just bodies scattered good head wat.
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: Little ancient history joke from you there, Thank you, King
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: George didn't even laugh. You fuck her. You're like, you
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: didn't say which king George kick the fifth? I don't
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: know fuck one that would be head? Whatever is that?
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: Do you mean?
• 18:15
  Speaker 3: Do I look like a history teacher's being on? Maybe
• 18:20
  Speaker 3: the one that be headed everybody?
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: Don't? Sorry, didn't they when they all be headers? Henry
• 18:26
  Speaker 1: the eighth? Thank you? Jes Jess is informing us. She's
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: googled that for sure.
• 18:31
  Speaker 3: Anyway, I kept finding these bodies everywhere, and and I
• 18:34
  Speaker 3: was like, where are all the heads?
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: Who's doing what with the heads? Now?
• 18:38
  Speaker 3: Maybe has a toy kitchen. You know, there's big toy kitchen.
• 18:42
  Speaker 3: She's always making food. She brings it out here, not
• 18:44
  Speaker 3: real food, like fake food anyway, So I just want
• 18:48
  Speaker 3: to show you.
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: Her kitchen. Oh god, okay, what are those tribes ash
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: where they they like they shrink the heads? Is it
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: Papa the Guinea?
• 18:59
  Speaker 2: What why do they do that? Track me the microwave.
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: There's like these tribes they like shrink the hang on.
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: Let me just want that really quickly. No, yes, so
• 19:07
  Speaker 1: the Amazonian tribes. So I don't like if you're from
• 19:10
  Speaker 1: pupping a guinea, didn't mean to attack you there, accuse
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: you of something you're not doing, but they would shrink
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: the heads. I think they put it in vinegar. Watch
• 19:18
  Speaker 1: Ripley's believe.
• 19:19
  Speaker 3: It or not.
• 19:19
  Speaker 2: I know how i'd dispose of a body.
• 19:21
  Speaker 3: Now, I've just passed this on to Macy, the serial
• 19:24
  Speaker 3: killer of the household anyway, So I've gone to her kitchen, yep, okay,
• 19:31
  Speaker 3: and in her kitchen she has a fake microwave. I'll
• 19:35
  Speaker 3: get you to just press play on this and you'll
• 19:38
  Speaker 3: notice something else in the video as.
• 19:40
  Speaker 1: Well that she's stashing in there from previous episodes. What's that?
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: What do we got? Oh my god? This is like
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: a graveyard of a serial killer.
• 19:48
  Speaker 3: So she's pulling the heads off the lego, leaving the
• 19:52
  Speaker 3: torsos throughout the house, storing the heads in a makeshift cot.
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: He's like darb in the microwave. Who's that serial kill Dama?
• 20:03
  Speaker 1: You remember him? Wasn't that Jeffrey Dahma?
• 20:06
  Speaker 4: Dama?
• 20:06
  Speaker 3: Macy Dama. You've got what's next to it? Eclipsement If
• 20:15
  Speaker 3: you're not familiar. Macy is addicted to Eclipse mints, and
• 20:19
  Speaker 3: we spoke about this a long time ago, where she's
• 20:21
  Speaker 3: an addict. I catch her climbing all sorts of furniture
• 20:24
  Speaker 3: to get to eclipse mints. But she's got a stash
• 20:27
  Speaker 3: of eclipse mints what in her microwave.
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: Along with the heads of all the lego. Wow, there's
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: a lot to unpack here. There's a lot to unpack.
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: Are we concerned? Absolutely? Yeah.
• 20:39
  Speaker 3: I was concerned when I found all the book flaps
• 20:40
  Speaker 3: under the bed. Remember this is this is another staty.
• 20:45
  Speaker 3: Any psychologists listening in, what does this mean? What does
• 20:49
  Speaker 3: this mean for Macy?
• 20:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah? Red flags? I think so. The fact is.
• 20:53
  Speaker 3: She's got like an m O like most serial killers have,
• 20:56
  Speaker 3: which is pop the head, discard the body where wherever.
• 21:00
  Speaker 1: She and she wants to keep something to remember them by.
• 21:03
  Speaker 2: Just keeping it, and then she puts it in there.
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: So that's her whole Oh my god. So I'm concerned.
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: I'll keep you posting sleep with one io. He doesn't know.
• 21:12
  Speaker 1: I know.
• 21:13
  Speaker 3: I put that back confront her. I will be don't
• 21:16
  Speaker 3: you worry, Like with the book thing, and she ran
• 21:18
  Speaker 3: like a proper criminal.
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: To you right now, she will be Leganette.
• 21:25
  Speaker 3: Anyway, that's one thing you've missed, and the second thing
• 21:28
  Speaker 3: you've missed is and I don't know if this is
• 21:32
  Speaker 3: a known hack, but I April has taught the kids
• 21:36
  Speaker 3: something that I thought was genius and I want to
• 21:40
  Speaker 3: see what you think and whether you do it, So
• 21:42
  Speaker 3: I'll just explain it to you and then i'll show
• 21:43
  Speaker 3: you the little video and for the listeners of course,
• 21:46
  Speaker 3: because this is an audio medium. It is winter, as
• 21:53
  Speaker 3: you know here in Australia, it is winter, and it
• 21:56
  Speaker 3: does get cold in winter, believe it or not real.
• 22:00
  Speaker 3: So we're talking multiple layers on adults and children of clothes.
• 22:04
  Speaker 1: Do you have any heater in your house? Yeah, it's
• 22:07
  Speaker 1: in the kids room. What do you have?
• 22:09
  Speaker 2: It's just like an oil heater, that's all. We've got.
• 22:11
  Speaker 3: Jesus christro and no insulation under the floor and it's
• 22:15
  Speaker 3: just timber flooring.
• 22:16
  Speaker 2: It's like walking on ice.
• 22:18
  Speaker 3: I have never been cold, like properly cold until living
• 22:22
  Speaker 3: until now.
• 22:23
  Speaker 1: It's also I feel like when you get older, you
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: get colder. Yeah, that's that's the thing too. And also
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: you've dropped a bit of weight. That's just some shready
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: just not eating. What was I doing?
• 22:34
  Speaker 3: Yes, it's cold, so multiple layers and sometimes that would
• 22:37
  Speaker 3: include of a long sleeve shirt with a long sleeve jumper.
• 22:41
  Speaker 2: And when you put a jumper on over a long sleeve.
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: What happens? Okay, so this is one thing that kids hate.
• 22:47
  Speaker 1: The sleeve of the T shirt will then ride up. Yes,
• 22:51
  Speaker 1: and it's like it's I don't know why, it's just
• 22:56
  Speaker 1: so triggering for kids when it happens. Trier girl this
• 23:00
  Speaker 1: morning with Lola put the jumper on, and she's very sensory,
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: and when that happens, when it was riding up, it
• 23:05
  Speaker 1: was like she had a scorpion under her jumper.
• 23:08
  Speaker 3: She was like, God, Daddy, I'm going to solve this
• 23:12
  Speaker 3: problem for you. Well, April, my wife is going to
• 23:15
  Speaker 3: solve this for you. This is Oscar this morning putting
• 23:18
  Speaker 3: on his little raincoat jacket thing over a long sleep.
• 23:21
  Speaker 1: Okay, this better be good. She's cracked the code. See
• 23:24
  Speaker 1: what she's done there.
• 23:25
  Speaker 2: Oscar pulls the sleeve up to the palm of his hand.
• 23:28
  Speaker 3: He puts a finger over it so his hand can
• 23:31
  Speaker 3: still go through, and once he gets through, its close enough.
• 23:35
  Speaker 3: He lets go and the sleeve ends up perfectly where
• 23:38
  Speaker 3: the sleeve is.
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: What does Oscar think of this hack? He does it
• 23:41
  Speaker 1: on his own. He's learnt it.
• 23:43
  Speaker 3: It's not just here do this, it's like, here do
• 23:46
  Speaker 3: this and he just continues.
• 23:48
  Speaker 1: To do it. He did that without anyone even asking.
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: If only kids out there would know about this hack,
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: the amount of trauma that would be reduced in the
• 23:55
  Speaker 1: lives of young children all around the country, especially now
• 23:58
  Speaker 1: being winter, even around the world old.
• 24:01
  Speaker 3: If seasons are a world Is this the best hack
• 24:03
  Speaker 3: that we've ever had?
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: I think it might be.
• 24:06
  Speaker 3: I think it's the most simplest, cost effective.
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: How can we monetize this, jess Jessica, you're about to
• 24:13
  Speaker 1: say something, Oh, Jesse, hang on, this rich coming from
• 24:18
  Speaker 1: someone with their kids? Are we dumb? Ash? Maybe? Is
• 24:23
  Speaker 1: this something that is just such common knowledge that it's
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: almost laughable that we don't know? Yeah? I hope so?
• 24:31
  Speaker 1: Is this be hilarious? Are we just we effectively told
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: people to tie their shoelacers before leaving the house? Is
• 24:39
  Speaker 1: that I always do that after I leave the house?
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: I mean, we'll find out. Let us know. If this
• 24:48
  Speaker 1: is such common knowledge that it's laughable that we're telling
• 24:51
  Speaker 1: you about it, we will withhold informing you about any
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: more hacks.
• 24:56
  Speaker 3: Oh yeah, nah, I think this is great. I think
• 25:02
  Speaker 3: around life changing.
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: I think too, and I want to be responsible for
• 25:09
  Speaker 1: expanding the knowledge of parents not just in Australia again
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: all around the world. Right now, we will be responsible
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: for improving the lives of so many, so many.
• 25:20
  Speaker 3: And I will say we could get it from the
• 25:23
  Speaker 3: horse's mouth because we are going to call.
• 25:25
  Speaker 2: April about a separate issue later on the track.
• 25:27
  Speaker 1: Later in this episode we can talk to about what
• 25:30
  Speaker 1: other information is she withholding from us?
• 25:32
  Speaker 2: So if you stick around then you might find out.
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: How's a fucking good tease? Do you want to do? Yes?
• 25:41
  Speaker 3: Math, Sorry, yes, Matthew. It is time for one of
• 25:45
  Speaker 3: our favorite segments. I'd say arguably the favorite, the favorite,
• 25:49
  Speaker 3: and I would say the song is Aria Award nominee potential.
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: Well said, let's play it, you tly regression. You don't
• 26:01
  Speaker 1: want to sol just tell me why your parent?
• 26:10
  Speaker 3: Do you want my crand party at the shop?
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: You don't want advice from strangers? Go and tell me
• 26:19
  Speaker 1: what is your parent? Are we gonna have any tap
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: on the shoulders from the record the record the record
• 26:28
  Speaker 1: label to say hey, we're.
• 26:30
  Speaker 3: Just showing that jumperhack and they'll back right off and
• 26:33
  Speaker 3: they're like, you gave us something. We do not want
• 26:35
  Speaker 3: to go to court with these these guys.
• 26:39
  Speaker 1: This is my favorite segment. It is, of course parents
• 26:43
  Speaker 1: just it's an opportunity for any parents out there, not
• 26:46
  Speaker 1: just myself and Ash, but for all the listeners to
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: just get something off their chest that is grinding their gears,
• 26:53
  Speaker 1: making them a little bit of making themselves a little
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: bit frustrated. You need to give these situations, O gen
• 27:01
  Speaker 1: well said. I will say, you really teed that up.
• 27:04
  Speaker 1: We had a great one. Okay. Go from Hugh. Hello, Hugh,
• 27:10
  Speaker 1: hu from the Facebook group. Ah, you from the Facebook grof.
• 27:15
  Speaker 2: If you're not in the Facebook group, it's on Facebook.
• 27:18
  Speaker 1: He's in there. He's in there. If you want to
• 27:19
  Speaker 1: hang out with you, who's in there? He isn't there? Okay?
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: In the group?
• 27:26
  Speaker 3: Okay from Hugh. This is Hugh's pay rant.
• 27:32
  Speaker 1: Daycare centers charging you normal day rates on a public
• 27:36
  Speaker 1: holiday when they are closed has to be the biggest
• 27:38
  Speaker 1: pyramid scheme going around.
• 27:42
  Speaker 2: First of all pyramid scheme.
• 27:45
  Speaker 1: No or. He goes on to say, the poor parents
• 27:47
  Speaker 1: with kids booked in for Mondays and Fridays are suffering
• 27:50
  Speaker 1: a great injustice.
• 27:52
  Speaker 3: I feel like we definitely have talked about this before,
• 27:55
  Speaker 3: but I wasn't a rant.
• 27:57
  Speaker 2: It was like just in passing. I feel like a
• 28:00
  Speaker 2: long time ago.
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: Let's just clarify that this is not attack on the
• 28:05
  Speaker 1: daycare teachers, the staff.
• 28:07
  Speaker 3: No, the staff are the backbone them, rural doctors, dentists, mechanics,
• 28:14
  Speaker 3: the backbone of our nation. This is an attack on
• 28:18
  Speaker 3: the system. Fuck the system, man, the system.
• 28:23
  Speaker 1: I mean, it's got to be it's got to be
• 28:26
  Speaker 1: a fucking joke, right period. Scheme is the wrong scheme.
• 28:28
  Speaker 3: That's I feel like the daycares aren't going out to
• 28:32
  Speaker 3: other daycares giving them this idea and they're growing in numbers.
• 28:35
  Speaker 1: That's what a pyramid scheme is, right, correct. This is
• 28:38
  Speaker 1: a general scheme scheme. This is a ripoff scheme. This
• 28:42
  Speaker 1: is a ripoff scheme. Match, this is a this is
• 28:45
  Speaker 1: a gas light scheme, if you will, it's a gas
• 28:48
  Speaker 1: lighting ripoff scheme.
• 28:49
  Speaker 3: Because I'm aware orchestrated by system, the system, the daycare
• 28:55
  Speaker 3: system of Australia.
• 28:56
  Speaker 1: I'd love to know what happens in other countries. But here,
• 29:00
  Speaker 1: if you were booked in on a day that as
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: a public holiday, they still charge you full rates. You're
• 29:05
  Speaker 1: still paying for it. How the hell does that work?
• 29:10
  Speaker 1: When I was previously we had the kids and on
• 29:13
  Speaker 1: a Monday and a Friday.
• 29:14
  Speaker 3: Man, it was it didn't make any sense, as I reckon,
• 29:19
  Speaker 3: pet parents have something to do with it.
• 29:21
  Speaker 1: Hundreds of dollars every single year wasted. I mean, what
• 29:24
  Speaker 1: is the answer here? How how can they get away
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: with such blatant ripoffery.
• 29:30
  Speaker 3: Well, let's well, I think we should get in touch
• 29:32
  Speaker 3: with someone who might know who was working We used
• 29:35
  Speaker 3: to work for this.
• 29:38
  Speaker 1: Just give my beautiful.
• 29:42
  Speaker 2: You're like, sorry, I won't answer it.
• 29:49
  Speaker 1: She's a busy Hello, darling, how are.
• 29:52
  Speaker 3: You good what you're doing working?
• 29:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah? Right, you're not working for a daycare, are you?
• 30:02
  Speaker 1: You're not? No, I don't worry. There's a dumb joke
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: from it.
• 30:05
  Speaker 3: We had a parent message in with a rant, and
• 30:08
  Speaker 3: I just want to give you some context on the
• 30:10
  Speaker 3: rant and you having previous work experience at a childcare center.
• 30:16
  Speaker 2: Also, you have children in my room, April.
• 30:18
  Speaker 1: Can you just confirm how long did you work as
• 30:20
  Speaker 1: an early educator?
• 30:22
  Speaker 4: Oh? I think like seven or eight years?
• 30:26
  Speaker 2: Oh wow, wow, wow, almost a decade.
• 30:29
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 30:29
  Speaker 3: She used to get sick so much because oh my god,
• 30:33
  Speaker 3: Like she would come home and she'd be like, oh
• 30:35
  Speaker 3: one of the kids was sick.
• 30:36
  Speaker 1: I'm like, great, now I'm going to be sick. Here
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: we go again. And when I got sacked from every
• 30:40
  Speaker 1: job I had the question the rant.
• 30:43
  Speaker 3: Is that these childcare.
• 30:45
  Speaker 2: Centers, the system as we call them.
• 30:48
  Speaker 3: Are charging people still for public holidays when they're closed.
• 30:53
  Speaker 1: Do you know why that might be? Uh?
• 30:57
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I think because you still have to pay the staff, so.
• 31:01
  Speaker 1: You're paying.
• 31:02
  Speaker 4: It's like it's like a voting for the day because
• 31:04
  Speaker 4: the stuff still get paid.
• 31:05
  Speaker 1: But they want to get paid.
• 31:07
  Speaker 3: Yeah, because if it wasn't a public holiday, they would
• 31:09
  Speaker 3: be working, right, So the I mean, I know they're
• 31:12
  Speaker 3: probably like, we would work, but bullshit?
• 31:15
  Speaker 1: Is it justifier? Though? But but you're not. We're not.
• 31:18
  Speaker 1: We're not using the daycare though it's closed.
• 31:22
  Speaker 4: Well, fun fact, the day care that we just moved
• 31:26
  Speaker 4: from now means he's only casually there now offers free
• 31:30
  Speaker 4: public holiday casual days to replace the day that you
• 31:33
  Speaker 4: paid for and it just started when we've already left
• 31:36
  Speaker 4: that one get lost.
• 31:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah okay, so hang on a minute.
• 31:39
  Speaker 3: So if okay, every kid that would be there on
• 31:43
  Speaker 3: the Monday they just gone, would get a free casual
• 31:46
  Speaker 3: day at any time to use down the track.
• 31:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah, wow, is this a government thing or just.
• 31:53
  Speaker 4: No, I think some centers did it. Ours definitely didn't
• 31:56
  Speaker 4: until we left, and then they decided.
• 31:58
  Speaker 1: They'll do that.
• 31:58
  Speaker 3: And to that center, we commend you, we do on
• 32:01
  Speaker 3: your bravery. Yeah wow, not being compliant with a system
• 32:06
  Speaker 3: that is destroying families all around the country. Just breaking
• 32:09
  Speaker 3: away from the stigma that is it's the system.
• 32:14
  Speaker 4: Weirdly, like, I don't think you get charged on like
• 32:16
  Speaker 4: Christmas Day and stuff.
• 32:18
  Speaker 2: If that a public that.
• 32:19
  Speaker 3: Would just be on Christmas, like, wouldn't it. Yeah, where's
• 32:21
  Speaker 3: your Christmas spirit? Here's a bill they thought a head
• 32:24
  Speaker 3: for that one? Right? What else did we want to
• 32:26
  Speaker 3: ask her that we were just talking about before?
• 32:29
  Speaker 1: Oh? Yeah, who taught you the jumper hack? Oh? Yes,
• 32:34
  Speaker 1: I have no idea.
• 32:35
  Speaker 4: Maybe I got taught it. Maybe it's a generational thing.
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: I've been taught. Poppa's got something to do with it,
• 32:41
  Speaker 1: for sure. Yeah, Papa would be able.
• 32:43
  Speaker 4: To it as a kid and whatnot.
• 32:46
  Speaker 3: So Papa would be able to tuck that in and
• 32:48
  Speaker 3: somehow land a hanky in there at the same time.
• 32:51
  Speaker 1: Is it not known?
• 32:51
  Speaker 4: It's a universal hack, isn't it?
• 32:53
  Speaker 3: Just?
• 32:55
  Speaker 1: I put Lolla's jumper on this morning and it rolled
• 32:58
  Speaker 1: up the sleeves underneath. We had his tantrums. I didn't
• 33:02
  Speaker 1: know about it until now. Well now you do.
• 33:04
  Speaker 4: You're welcome.
• 33:05
  Speaker 3: Thank you, Thank you, Papa, I'll say, because that seems
• 33:08
  Speaker 3: very proper, like.
• 33:10
  Speaker 1: Probably all right, well April, what are you wearing? I mean,
• 33:15
  Speaker 1: I'll see you later, all right, love you you later.
• 33:19
  Speaker 1: I have good day, Love you, love you, love you.
• 33:22
  Speaker 1: Bye bye you hang.
• 33:25
  Speaker 3: Up one three you go, bye bye bye.
• 33:30
  Speaker 1: Oh my god, you guys are so adorable.
• 33:32
  Speaker 2: Thank you.
• 33:37
  Speaker 1: Well there you go.
• 33:38
  Speaker 2: So I say, fair rant on that pair. Rant, See
• 33:44
  Speaker 2: what did you do? Just shake it ahead.
• 33:49
  Speaker 1: You've missed this. I say, that's fair rant.
• 33:52
  Speaker 3: And hopefully they can suggest to their childcare center that
• 33:56
  Speaker 3: others are doing this and that's actually a pyramid scheme.
• 33:59
  Speaker 1: Then if you're if you're a daycare listening in, if
• 34:03
  Speaker 1: you're like a daycare ceo, just think about it, Okay,
• 34:07
  Speaker 1: think about who you're hurting. Yeah, with your government mandated legislation.
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: They're like, our hands are tired, but we'll give you
• 34:17
  Speaker 1: three days. If that's what you want. That's you should.
• 34:19
  Speaker 2: We go into some questions to finish off today.
• 34:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we've got some questions here, ash and we have
• 34:24
  Speaker 1: recently been doing a little segment in the listener question.
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: We have been doing fucking Jesus can't talk, Yes, Ash
• 34:33
  Speaker 1: we should, and we've been doing the last couple of weeks,
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: we've been doing like our top three it and one
• 34:41
  Speaker 1: that really kicked off was things you Shouldn't say to
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: a parent?
• 34:45
  Speaker 3: And the list is it really is endless, Like there's
• 34:48
  Speaker 3: so many things you shouldn't say to a parent.
• 34:50
  Speaker 1: So I thought it would be remiss of us not
• 34:53
  Speaker 1: to do things you shouldn't say to a parent.
• 34:56
  Speaker 3: Cart I love it. Put some silly music behind that.
• 34:58
  Speaker 3: Please do, because you're a bunch of clowns. If you
• 35:02
  Speaker 3: say any of this to a parent, thank you. All right,
• 35:06
  Speaker 3: So we've got a list here, yeah, and we're going
• 35:08
  Speaker 3: to just rattle off a few and then if you've
• 35:11
  Speaker 3: got any that you want to share with us, please
• 35:13
  Speaker 3: on the Facebook group, Instagram, TikTok, whatever you want to do,
• 35:17
  Speaker 3: shout it into the universe and we'll try and pick.
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: It up and put it inside. Don't do that. Definitely,
• 35:23
  Speaker 1: definitely messages smoke signals. Definitely message us to please. If
• 35:28
  Speaker 1: people are like I was screaming out for weeks.
• 35:30
  Speaker 2: I'll hear you go.
• 35:33
  Speaker 3: On, well here, okay, first one, This one really infuriates
• 35:38
  Speaker 3: me when someone tries to resonate with what you're saying
• 35:41
  Speaker 3: by saying, you.
• 35:42
  Speaker 1: Know I'm going to do I have a dog, so
• 35:44
  Speaker 1: I totally understand. No, you do not.
• 35:47
  Speaker 3: They think what they're doing is lightening the load on you, saying, oh,
• 35:52
  Speaker 3: we do that too, so you don't feel so abnormal.
• 35:54
  Speaker 1: Don't talk to us. It would be like someone losing
• 35:57
  Speaker 1: their arm in a car accident and going, I know
• 35:59
  Speaker 1: that's like I once got a splinter.
• 36:02
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I cut my fingernail too short.
• 36:03
  Speaker 1: One day it's irritating and you're like, I haven't had
• 36:07
  Speaker 1: a lean, my limb is missing.
• 36:09
  Speaker 3: Yeah I did not just say my look, it was
• 36:14
  Speaker 3: the next one.
• 36:15
  Speaker 1: Okay. Oh, it goes so fast, you'll miss this one day.
• 36:22
  Speaker 1: I fucking hate when people say that.
• 36:26
  Speaker 2: Don't wish the days, like admit the messy.
• 36:28
  Speaker 1: Hands on the walls. One day that'll be gone and
• 36:31
  Speaker 1: you miss it. Like when will I miss that? Yeah?
• 36:35
  Speaker 1: I don't. I get the premise of it.
• 36:37
  Speaker 3: It's like you'll miss the like you'll miss the little
• 36:40
  Speaker 3: cuddle tomit the kids. Yeah get that, I get that,
• 36:42
  Speaker 3: But I'm wishing I get home and I'm like, it's
• 36:45
  Speaker 3: four o'clock.
• 36:45
  Speaker 1: I'm like, funk, I wish it was six o'clock. I
• 36:47
  Speaker 1: am not going to miss like begging my child to
• 36:51
  Speaker 1: eat a mouthful of their dinner and then putting up
• 36:54
  Speaker 1: with a child that is screaming that it hates you
• 36:56
  Speaker 1: because you're trying to wash its hair. Oh man, there's
• 36:59
  Speaker 1: lots of ads are parenting a young child that I
• 37:01
  Speaker 1: will definitely not miss, And you trying to say that,
• 37:06
  Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm going to miss those parts of parenting.
• 37:10
  Speaker 1: Do you have any people who say that we're not
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: a fucking hands on parent.
• 37:14
  Speaker 3: Yeah, And it's usually the grandparents saying that sort of shit. Right,
• 37:19
  Speaker 3: if a young person says that they've been brainwashed by
• 37:21
  Speaker 3: an older person, idiots for sure.
• 37:23
  Speaker 1: All right.
• 37:24
  Speaker 3: Next one, which is sort of like similar to the
• 37:28
  Speaker 3: grandparent thing. They love to do this one, and I'll
• 37:31
  Speaker 3: try to put some context around it.
• 37:32
  Speaker 1: For example, if your.
• 37:33
  Speaker 3: Child's not sleeping, that's a really it's a low loan
• 37:36
  Speaker 3: through that one. And my mum would say it, and
• 37:39
  Speaker 3: other mum's mums would say it where they're like, have
• 37:42
  Speaker 3: you tried this?
• 37:46
  Speaker 1: Have you tried putting them in bed?
• 37:48
  Speaker 3: Yes, like fuck off, Like it's always that generation you
• 37:53
  Speaker 3: do that.
• 37:53
  Speaker 1: Sorry, I've done that. A number of any parents out
• 37:56
  Speaker 1: there that I've said that too. And this is when
• 37:58
  Speaker 1: I had Marley, who was a great sleeper, and I
• 38:00
  Speaker 1: was just like, have you tried to swaddle? Swaddling? Try
• 38:05
  Speaker 1: try a different dummy.
• 38:06
  Speaker 2: Or what we do is we sorry you do?
• 38:10
  Speaker 1: Okay? I have said that. No one's person.
• 38:12
  Speaker 2: Don't say that. Don't say have you tried?
• 38:14
  Speaker 3: I know it's a suggestion and very lighthearted, but it's
• 38:17
  Speaker 3: usually coming from a place of, like I say, from grandparents,
• 38:21
  Speaker 3: where they think whatever they say is right just because
• 38:23
  Speaker 3: of their age and their experience. It's like you used
• 38:26
  Speaker 3: to beat kids in your generation.
• 38:30
  Speaker 1: You tried beating that kid. Just always remind my mom
• 38:32
  Speaker 1: about that, and she's.
• 38:33
  Speaker 3: Like, I never I always say to my parents our
• 38:35
  Speaker 3: woodenspoons for cooking. Only when you announce her expecting and
• 38:43
  Speaker 3: someone says, oh, were you trying? No, it was an accident,
• 38:48
  Speaker 3: starting your business, an abortion, Oh my god.
• 38:52
  Speaker 1: It's none of your business. It's like, look, I didn't
• 38:56
  Speaker 1: know you were trying. No, you were trying. I didn't
• 38:58
  Speaker 1: know that you were mounting her. What's that about?
• 39:01
  Speaker 3: What's that about Oh my god, it doesn't matter really
• 39:05
  Speaker 3: if you ask me. But look, we're all I think
• 39:07
  Speaker 3: we're all guilty of saying that once here and.
• 39:09
  Speaker 1: There next one. This is just like back in my day.
• 39:16
  Speaker 3: Oh, never start a sentence to a parent if you're older.
• 39:22
  Speaker 1: I really hate the grandparents. I'm really into it. Sorry,
• 39:25
  Speaker 1: pop up and my parents.
• 39:27
  Speaker 2: I guess they exist too.
• 39:28
  Speaker 3: It's it's like, yeah, back, if you're going to start
• 39:31
  Speaker 3: a sentence with back in my day, just back right up.
• 39:36
  Speaker 1: I'm going to flip this and instead of attacking the
• 39:39
  Speaker 1: older generation, I'm going to attack the younger generation. Here
• 39:42
  Speaker 1: he is, okay, yeah, I'm becoming more TEENI every week
• 39:49
  Speaker 1: down down those electric bikes when they and like, this
• 39:55
  Speaker 1: doesn't happen as much anymore, but because I dog working
• 39:58
  Speaker 1: an office. But if anyone on a Friday or Thursday,
• 40:01
  Speaker 1: they say, have you got any exciting plans for the weekend,
• 40:04
  Speaker 1: and I'm like, I'm going to go to a park
• 40:07
  Speaker 1: for a couple of hours.
• 40:08
  Speaker 2: Well, buy another park for a few hours, and.
• 40:10
  Speaker 1: I maybe watched some cartoons with the kids, And that
• 40:14
  Speaker 1: is what I'm doing.
• 40:14
  Speaker 3: Get some broken sleep. I'm gonna yell at a child
• 40:16
  Speaker 3: to try and eat all weekend.
• 40:18
  Speaker 1: I'll do a couple of loads of washing.
• 40:19
  Speaker 3: Yeah, they'll have to follow me everything I do around
• 40:22
  Speaker 3: all the time. It's such a good way to be like, hey,
• 40:25
  Speaker 3: it really screams have a good shit weekend.
• 40:31
  Speaker 1: The weekend just gone. That gurnying that was the highlight reprieve.
• 40:35
  Speaker 1: That was the highlight. Dude. People were like, did you
• 40:37
  Speaker 1: get up too much?
• 40:38
  Speaker 3: I'm like, I washed some pavers and that was the
• 40:42
  Speaker 3: highlight of my week.
• 40:44
  Speaker 1: It was like a holiday fuck. And if they came
• 40:46
  Speaker 1: near me, I just hit it with the water. Perfect.
• 40:49
  Speaker 1: Last one.
• 40:52
  Speaker 2: This is so triggering. This last one's triggering me. Come on,
• 40:58
  Speaker 2: why do I feel like this.
• 40:59
  Speaker 3: Is coming from a grandparent as well or just.
• 41:02
  Speaker 1: Someone with older kids?
• 41:04
  Speaker 3: They say, if you think this is hard, just wait until.
• 41:11
  Speaker 1: I get that all the time with the girls, because
• 41:14
  Speaker 1: they're like, oh, teenage girls, that's another kettle of fish.
• 41:18
  Speaker 1: Oh my god, especially because you've were all girls. I
• 41:21
  Speaker 1: know you want to manage my expectations, but just the
• 41:24
  Speaker 1: ignorance is bliss.
• 41:25
  Speaker 3: Oh yeah, I don't want someone being like with Oscar.
• 41:27
  Speaker 3: It's like, you think it's hard, now wait till he's
• 41:29
  Speaker 3: committing petty crime. Waiting until I'll tell you right now,
• 41:36
  Speaker 3: I'm fucking waiting. Maybe they'll lock him up and I'll
• 41:40
  Speaker 3: get some real reprieve.
• 41:41
  Speaker 1: Ash before we go. I have one very quick question
• 41:44
  Speaker 1: that I'd love to ask you on behalf of Gemma.
• 41:47
  Speaker 1: Hello Jemma.
• 41:48
  Speaker 3: This was submitted in the Facebook group a number of
• 41:50
  Speaker 3: weeks ago Jemmy with a JA or Jemmy with the
• 41:52
  Speaker 3: G Jemmy with the G.
• 41:53
  Speaker 1: Jimmy goff gg good game. She says, advice what to
• 42:00
  Speaker 1: do when your toddler comes home from daycare and starts
• 42:03
  Speaker 1: pinching you non stop. She finds it hilarious. No matter
• 42:07
  Speaker 1: what we try or say help.
• 42:09
  Speaker 3: Gemma finds it hilarious or the child finds it hilarious. No,
• 42:12
  Speaker 3: I think the child or God first of all, Matt,
• 42:15
  Speaker 3: we don't give it. You're being assaulted right now.
• 42:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah, call the police. That's my advice. Yeah, call the police.
• 42:23
  Speaker 1: And sometimes you know, police will do like a home
• 42:26
  Speaker 1: visit to try and scare a child. I think that's
• 42:29
  Speaker 1: what you need. That's not bad, that's not about it.
• 42:32
  Speaker 3: I think you could go because they're obviously learning it
• 42:34
  Speaker 3: from somewhere, and I think if they're coming home from daycare.
• 42:39
  Speaker 3: They're learning it there, so to outlearn it, it's their responsibility.
• 42:43
  Speaker 3: So what I would do is I would threaten the
• 42:45
  Speaker 3: teacher and say I'll start pinching you every time that
• 42:49
  Speaker 3: kid pinches me, unless you teach it out of us.
• 42:53
  Speaker 1: But again, we love our early educators in this country.
• 42:56
  Speaker 1: I'm out of going my kid hit me.
• 42:58
  Speaker 2: Every time my kid hits me, I'm going to hit you.
• 43:01
  Speaker 1: When she's getting locked up for assaulting teachers. I just
• 43:05
  Speaker 1: pinch back the child. Give the child a taste of
• 43:07
  Speaker 1: its own medicine. Yeah that too. Do you like it?
• 43:09
  Speaker 1: You don't like it?
• 43:10
  Speaker 3: If that reminds me of like when I, like, I
• 43:13
  Speaker 3: tried to do a little learning moment with MACI where
• 43:16
  Speaker 3: it was like she was getting what was she doing?
• 43:22
  Speaker 3: I said to her, Okay, look, how would it feel
• 43:25
  Speaker 3: if you ask mommy and daddy to do something and
• 43:27
  Speaker 3: we just didn't do it for you? How would you feel?
• 43:30
  Speaker 3: And she's like sad. I'm like, so, when we ask
• 43:32
  Speaker 3: you to do something for us and you don't do it,
• 43:34
  Speaker 3: how do you think.
• 43:35
  Speaker 1: We feel you're a good parent?
• 43:37
  Speaker 2: Sad?
• 43:37
  Speaker 3: And I was like, so do you understand? And she's
• 43:40
  Speaker 3: like nah, No. I was like, okay, well I'm going
• 43:42
  Speaker 3: to pinch you now, so fuck.
• 43:44
  Speaker 1: She's like, stop talking to me. I want to kill
• 43:45
  Speaker 1: some Lego toys. I want to pinch the head of
• 43:47
  Speaker 1: a Lego toy. Ash. Yes, if you have joined this podcast,
• 43:52
  Speaker 1: maybe for the first time, maybe this is your first episode.
• 43:54
  Speaker 1: This is one hundred and fifty first episode. Thank you
• 43:57
  Speaker 1: very much. I think it's more than that, isn't No, no, yes,
• 44:01
  Speaker 1: you're right. Sorry, congratulations to you. Thank you very much,
• 44:05
  Speaker 1: very kind of you. What should people do right now
• 44:07
  Speaker 1: if they've just joined us, it's the first episode?
• 44:09
  Speaker 3: What like? What like subscribe, leave a review, five stars,
• 44:14
  Speaker 3: share it with ten friends. Like a pyramid scheme? Just
• 44:17
  Speaker 3: go to the social media share that with ten friends.
• 44:19
  Speaker 3: Just a bunch of pyramids. Please scheme your way to success,
• 44:24
  Speaker 3: they say, well said, and get it on a T shirt.
• 44:27
  Speaker 1: Schemulated success. That's next merch. Speaking of merch, we have
• 44:32
  Speaker 1: T shirts. I'm wearing one, smelling happy teas on our
• 44:34
  Speaker 1: website Foodoting Dads dot com. Ash. You need to get
• 44:39
  Speaker 1: a flight. We need to get out of here. Goodbye,
• 44:42
  Speaker 1: see you guys. Bye. Who's in the group. Who's in
• 44:51
  Speaker 1: the group Facebook group? Dan? And then and then and
• 44:54
  Speaker 1: then there you go. Two Doting Dads podcast acknowledges the
• 44:57
  Speaker 1: traditional custodians of country throughout Australia and the connections to land,
• 45:02
  Speaker 1: sea and community.
• 45:03
  Speaker 3: We pay our respects to their elders past and present
• 45:06
  Speaker 3: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestrate Islander
• 45:09
  Speaker 3: peoples today