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Words About Palantir · Stuff Keeps Happening

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Hello. I received a response in four to six business
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days. But stuff still happened. So what's up?
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Palantir cannot see why kids love the taste of
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Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Despite being a corporation
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that's very, very well known for all their surveillance
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software, they just cannot see the cinnamon swirl
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in every bite. That's enough of that. Palantir's
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in the news. What's Palantir? Palantir is a US
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tech company that was founded by Peter Thiel,
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Alex Karp, and some other jabronis. It was founded
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back in 2003, and one of its major founding funders,
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aside from Thiel, was literally the CIA. There's
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this thing called In -Q -Tel, I -Q -T, and it's
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a taxpayer -funded venture capital firm that
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explicitly invests in corporations to support
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the CIA. It's a pool of money the CIA uses to
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coerce tech people to do things for them. And
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if you're Palantir, you just love that idea.
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So from the drop, Palantir's stated mission is
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to build software to help the government do surveillance
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and shit. They specialize in militarized intelligence.
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Like, this is what they do. But they're also
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a company, like on the stock market, not a part
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of the government. One of their flagship products
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is called Gotham, and what it does is combine
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a whole bunch of data that's not really supposed
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to be combined so that they can type in someone's
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name and find them. It's not necessarily that
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straightforward, but the idea is that it is an
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omni -surveillance system. So Palantir's already
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kind of... not well -liked among the general
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populace, and then this past weekend they took
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to Twitter to post a 22 -point summary of a book
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that was co -authored by the CEO, Alex Karp.
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It reads essentially like a manifesto, and I'm
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not gonna read every point to you here, I have
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linked it in the newsletter, but it basically
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summarizes to, we should get rid of democracy,
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poor people are bad, and multiculturalism failed
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us. Oh, and billionaires are fundamentally more
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important than you. They also call for forced
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military participation from all citizens of the
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U .S. And just to like drive home how out of
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touch this random ass manifesto was, here's a
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point from it. Quote, public servants need not
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be our priests. Any business that compensated
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its employees in the way that the federal government
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compensates public servants would struggle to
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survive. Hey, motherfucker, that's because the
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government's not a corporation. Weird. So yeah,
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out of nowhere, they come on Twitter and they're
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like, hey everyone, here's 22 bullet points from
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our founder about how we think the world should
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work, and it's all fascism. Isn't that exciting,
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everyone? Alex Karp is a fucking madman. Like,
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the dude can't stop excitedly talking about how
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good Palantir is at finding and killing people,
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or at least helping to find and kill people.
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Like, the dude is a comic book villain, so much
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so that a lot of the commentary about this has
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described it as such. Cheyenne McDonald at Engadget
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pretty much coined it and said that it basically
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reads like the ramblings of a comic book villain.
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The response was swift. People were like, hey,
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what the fuck? That was me being everyone. Just
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so you know. A bunch of articles came out about
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how unhinged this post is. Palantir stock started
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to drop when markets opened on Monday, and now
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foreign ministers are discussing whether or not
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they should drop their contracts with Palantir
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because what the fuck? Hey, I could be your national
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security advisor. Yes, do that. Now look, I am
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not a fool. Usually. I understand that militarized
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intelligence and national security and surveillance
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and all this stuff is just a fact of reality.
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It is a part of having a country in 2026. It
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just is how it is. And Palantir is just all too
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happy to capitalize on that. That's all they're
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doing is playing the game, but... playing the
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game without showing any remorse for the lives
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that they're ruining. And it really is kind of
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like a don't hate the player hate the game situation.
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Except I can hate the player because the player
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is changing the game's rules. When you sit down
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to play Monopoly with your younger cousin and
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they get upset because you took all their money
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and they're like, that's not how the game works.
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The game works where I get money. You say, okay,
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sure. Here's some money. That's fine. It's a
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board game. I don't care. When a multi -billion
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dollar defense contractor installs a vice president
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of the United States into an authoritarian regime
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that then turns around and uses that company
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as the forefront of their mass deportation efforts,
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I don't think that you then give them monopoly
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money. That's where I was going with that. Taxpayer
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dollars through the CIA funded the start of Palantir,
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whose essential express purpose right now is
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to create surveillance software for foreign and
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domestic use. Heavy on the domestic. Like, they
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truly do not think that anybody in this country
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deserves privacy. They would prefer a world where
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every single person's actions are cataloged at
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all times. Alex Carp is the epitome of somebody
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who looks at the world and says, I kind of know
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how computers work, and therefore I can fix all
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of the problems in the world. Optimization is
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the solution to humanity, is it not? There isn't
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much of a closing argument here, except for Palantir
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fucking sucks, and at least more people know
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about how much they suck now. Keep on showing
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your ass, Karp. I look forward to your trial.
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Let's talk about something completely different
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that I had no idea was happening, and I'm actually
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kind of interested in, and also might not be
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great, but could be cool. That was a lot of qualifiers.
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Let's talk about battery passports. Way over
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in the EU, in the faraway lands, where they are
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EU -y. they've been doing a lot of policy. So,
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you know how there's been a lot of digital policy
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recently that's just been fucking dumb, like
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all the age verification stuff? Well, in a world
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full of dumb policy, the EU sometimes does get
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it right. I think they've had a pretty hit -or
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-miss track record with digital policy so far,
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but sometimes they do get it kind of right. And
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this is interesting to me. Battery passports.
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The concept, which I will separate from... the
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rest of it, the concept is that for every industrial
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-grade battery on the market, there should be
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a QR code that you can scan that will tell you
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information about that battery, including its
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composition, where it was sourced from, who had
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previously used it, information like that. This
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would apply to big boy batteries. So batteries
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that would go into like an electric vehicle or
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some sort of like personal transportation device,
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like an electric scooter or something like that.
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It would not apply to cell phones, laptops, at
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least not yet. But the idea is that it's supposed
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to be a consumer protection. It's like a nutritional
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facts label, but for batteries, and it updates
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over time as that battery is used, recycled,
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or repurposed. So if you're buying a device,
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especially a used device, and you want to get
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actual information about how good the battery
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is in this device, you'd be able to get that
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using this system. Cool, okay, interesting, kind
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of neat. That seems that seems cool. Why are
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we doing this? The idea is that they are working
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towards a circular economy It's essentially a
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recycling program if we can better track the
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history of all the batteries that are in circulation
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in a given location Then we can better take care
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of where they're going to end up and what's gonna
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happen next with them rather than them all just
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Being trashed there's actually quite a few things
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that the EU is hoping to sort of like do something
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like this With but batteries is kind of a pilot
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program so to speak and especially especially
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batteries in like industrial contexts. So as
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a general consumer, you don't have much to worry
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about right now. Here's where it gets a little
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messy. I am a software developer and one of the
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first things that I was thinking as I'm reading
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the documentation about these battery passports
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is How is this gonna be implemented? Like, on
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a technical level? Where's the data gonna be
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stored? Who controls it? Who verifies it? Who
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can access it? And how? Quite literally, like,
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how am I gonna scan a QR code? What network is
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going to connect me to what database to get what
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information? I'm genuinely curious. Is there,
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like, an authoritative database? Please don't
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tell me this is, like, some blockchain bullshit?
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Good news, it's not blockchain bullshit. Because
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it's no bullshit yet. It doesn't exist. There
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are legal requirements in place about how the
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battery passport program will work, and they
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are more or less the following. First, a user
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must be able to scan a QR code to pull up the
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information. That one's pretty basic. Next, there
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are three levels of privacy regarding the information
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that can be accessed. Public information, like
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the battery's manufacturer or the battery chemistry.
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Protected information, like the battery health
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or the charge cycle count. And regulatory information,
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like the supply chain. And finally, it can't
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matter who the manufacturer is, this has to work
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regardless of who you are. So that says what
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has to happen, but it hasn't said how. They're
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still working on the actual technical details.
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So I can't really give an overview of how well
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structured this is, but you don't have to look
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far to find another EU digital policy that had
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a massive security issue almost immediately.
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I'm gonna go back to the age verification stuff.
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The EU recently rolled out the first version
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of their age verification app, and it got hacked
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almost instantly. The hack didn't really do anything,
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it was more of a proof that this is not a perfectly
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well and securely constructed app, but the researchers
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basically said it's not a matter of if, it's
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a matter of when this app is gonna have a huge
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problem. And that's one of the constant issues
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with verification on the internet. If you need
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to verify people, that means you need to get
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their personal information. If you get their
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personal information, that means it's in transit.
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And information in transit is dangerous. What's
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also dangerous is when that information is stored
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either intentionally or accidentally and then
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retrieved by an attacker. And unfortunately,
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a lot of tech companies are not in the business
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of deleting the information that they've received.
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They just store all of it instead. So unfortunately,
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you can't just take reasonable sounding digital
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policy and just expect it to work well. On the
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surface, age verification makes sense. A for
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-profit company who's engaging in business practices
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that are restricted to adults only should verify
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the age of their customers. If you go to a club,
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the bouncer's gonna check your ID on the way
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in. But there's a very big difference between
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Jeremy Bouncer at the club down the street checking
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your ID and your computer telling everyone who
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wants to know what your age range is and anything
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else it might know about you. All while digital
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Jeremy Bouncer has a copy of every ID they've
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ever looked at. For safekeeping. So battery passports.
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Good, bad? I don't know. I genuinely find it
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interesting. If implemented thoughtfully, it
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could genuinely be a boon for consumers. Again,
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it's like a nutritional facts label for batteries.
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I would love to have actual accurate battery
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information before purchasing something. And
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I'm already happy to see that they're considering
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stuff like multiple levels of privacy with this
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battery information, even for stuff that most
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people wouldn't think about, like how many times
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has the battery been charged? That's considered
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private. So I'm glad to see that that's already
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being considered, but I have my doubts. Still,
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neat. We're missing the forest, but we're also
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missing the trees. In late March, the Trump administration
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essentially gutted the entire U .S. Forest Service.
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This happened right before wildfire season, and
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we have already gotten to double the year -to
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-date average of wildfire acreage burn. Said
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another way, we are on pace for an unprecedented
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wildfire season. The policy is cynical and genuinely
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insulting. They're moving the Forest Service
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headquarters from Washington D .C. to Utah. And
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then they're closing all regional branches. They're
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also closing almost all research facilities which
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are spread around the country for the express
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purpose of researching how to prevent forest
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fires in different places around the country.
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So you might be wondering why, wait, why Utah?
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What? Utah is famously cozy with a lot of the
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natural resource extraction industry. logging,
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mining, all that good stuff. They love getting
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them lands from Utah. Utah's also suing the federal
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government to get more land, presumably to then
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hand it over. But the governor and senators of
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Utah are very, very aligned with that industry.
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I should say that part of the argument from the
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White House is that they're gonna make this more
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efficient, and that they're gonna have a dedicated
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task force for dealing with fires. They established
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a new department under the Department of Interior
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that is the Wildland Fire Service. This department
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has not been funded and is already understaffed.
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So they gutted the people who are generally the
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ones that are gonna take care of wildfire season,
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while establishing a totally new department that
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is supposed to do that but didn't get it funded.
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Hmm. If you live in an area that's prone to wildfires,
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please take extra precautions this season. Have
12:27
an emergency plan. Make a get -out bag. Please
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be careful. Would you like to have artificially
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intelligent feet? I know I would not. Shoe company
12:36
Allbirds has recently announced that they're
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going to pivot and become an AI infrastructure
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company. Allbirds is a Silicon Valley darling,
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and while they're not really like a tech company
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that's like a unicorn that you invest in and
12:48
get a whole bunch of money back, those are the
12:49
typical darlings, they were instead just like
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a fashion statement. If you were a tech bro in
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Silicon Valley, you probably had a pair of Allbirds.
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Allbirds then went public. And then completely
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fucking failed. Their stock went from about $30
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on opening day to under $3. Basically losing
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all value. Allbirds was supposed to be a conservation
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-focused company. They're a B Corp with public
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benefit initiatives, and the whole idea was sustainably
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sourced shoots. But that failed, and now they're
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pivoting to... AI. Arguably the least sustainable
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thing that we have on the planet. How can they
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do this? Great question. So they're listed on
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the stock market, right? They are bird on the
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stock market. And that's a shell listing. It's
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not literally all birds, but all birds is like
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a brand that can be separated from that shell
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listing. So their plan is to get rid of the Allbirds
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brand, rebrand themselves as New Bird AI, and
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get buy -in from the current shareholders to
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make this pivot. Because part of the pivot includes
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giving up on that whole being good to the earth
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thing. Maybe they'll like sustainably use slave
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labor to dig up cobalt. Now, I should say that
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after they announced the pivot, their stock price
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did spike, kind of put it into meme stock territory.
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I would not generally recommend investing In
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all birds right now, I am also not a financial
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advisor. Also, don't trade individual stocks.
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Lightning round! Virginia has become the latest
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state in the U .S. to enter the gerrymandering
14:14
war as they just passed a new temporary redistricting
14:17
map to get themselves some more seats for 2026
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in Congress. This was a response to what started
14:23
over in Texas where they did the same thing but
14:25
for Republicans. Cash Patel is suing the Atlantic
14:28
because the Atlantic ran a story about how Cash
14:30
Patel has been drunk on the job this whole time.
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and Cash Patel was like, I'm gonna sue you for
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defamation. I'm really looking forward to discovery.
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Microsoft is reportedly planning some changes
14:39
to the Game Pass pricing structure. The new CEO
14:43
of Xbox is not thrilled with the current value
14:45
proposition of Xbox Game Pass. After California
14:48
coffee chain Philz Coffee made a new rule that
14:50
required them to take down pride flags in their
14:53
stores, they undid that rule. Because obviously
14:56
everyone was like, what the fuck? You're a California
14:59
coffee chain? What did you think was going to
15:01
happen? According to the Wall Street Journal,
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fewer people are moving to Florida and more people
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are leaving Florida. While there are a lot more
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wealthy people who are going into Florida, the
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average person's being priced out and seeking
15:12
a life elsewhere. And finally for today, an otter
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barged in to a garden center in Scotland, where
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he kind of made himself at home for a while before
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ultimately getting captured by some vets. Dude
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was chillin'. Like, he just kinda strolled in
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and was like, I own this place now. Thank you
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so much for listening to today's episode of Stuff
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Keeps Happening. Head to skh .news for sources,
15:33
bonus content, and your own invasive otter. My
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name is Endeavorance, we'll talk again soon,
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take care, and be well.