Latest / Just Heal with Dr Jay / The Conversation Men Keep Avoiding with Ken Jones

Transcript

The Conversation Men Keep Avoiding with Ken Jones · Just Heal with Dr Jay

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: Hey, y'all.
• 0:01
  Speaker 2: Is Lauren La Rosa with the latest with Laurena Rosa
• 0:04
  Speaker 2: on Black Effects and I cannot wait to see you
• 0:07
  Speaker 2: guys at the fourth Annual Black Effect Podcast Festival. Okay,
• 0:11
  Speaker 2: we're coming back to Atlanta, Georgia on Saturday, April twenty
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: fifth at Palman Yards and it's hosted by me alongside
• 0:17
  Speaker 2: DJ MV and charlottagnea God. We got drink chances of
• 0:21
  Speaker 2: Noriega and DJAFM. We gotta keep it positive, Sweetye with
• 0:24
  Speaker 2: My Girl, Christopher N.
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: Haslin.
• 0:27
  Speaker 2: We got Reality with the King with My Guide, then
• 0:29
  Speaker 2: my brother Carlos King, and y'all know he does reality
• 0:32
  Speaker 2: commentary like nobody can now. We also have Don't Call
• 0:36
  Speaker 2: Me White Girl, the podcast I Love Mona and Club
• 0:39
  Speaker 2: five twenty podcasts, along with the Grits and Eggs podcast.
• 0:42
  Speaker 2: So this lineup sack Baby, turn up. You're also gonna
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: want to check out the panels that we have lined
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: up too, Feature and keV on stage, Tika Sumpter, and
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: John Hope Bryant just to name a few. Of course,
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: it's way bigger than podcast. We're bringing the Black Effect
• 0:57
  Speaker 2: marketplace with black owned businesses, bus the food truck court
• 1:01
  Speaker 2: to keep you fed while.
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: You visit us.
• 1:02
  Speaker 2: Okay, listen, you don't want to miss this. Tap in
• 1:05
  Speaker 2: and grab your ticket down at Black Effect dot Com
• 1:09
  Speaker 2: Flash Podcast Festival.
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: Welcome to Jesshill with Doctor J, a production of the
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: Black Effect Podcast Network and iHeartRadio. So welcome back to
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: another episode of Just Here with Doctor J. I am
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: your host, Doctor J. Barnett. I'm so happy to have
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: my good brother IFBB pro bodybuilder, former pro athlete, and
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: also Jim, owner of one of the dopest gym in Houston, Texas,
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: my second home. I was there in Houston thirteen years.
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: This brother Jim doesn't have a C. Let me say this,
• 1:42
  Speaker 1: so you don't go to Ken's gym unless you're ready
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: to transform your life. But you know I love gyms
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: with no AC conditions. So anyway, man, without further ado,
• 1:53
  Speaker 1: I want to introduce my good brother Jim owner Ken Miller. Yeah,
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: want to introduce my good brother Jim owner Ken Jones.
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: My good brother. How you doing, man? Man? How you doing? Man? Brother?
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: I don't know if that shirt got any more room kid?
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: How you feel man? I'm great man, I'm glad to
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: be here, man, brother. Listen, I cannot tell you how
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: many people reached out to me. It's like you got
• 2:18
  Speaker 1: to get King on the show because you sort of
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: like a mystique, you know, mystery to so many people.
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: It's like they see the training, the dieting, the food,
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: the gym. But I think today people are gonna get
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: to see the man. How you feel about.
• 2:37
  Speaker 3: That, I'm open with that, open with that, all right, man?
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: Because now, because I don't know if you're familiar and
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: you saw the episode before your we had church on
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: this last episode, doctor Johnson came in here and slayed
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: all of us. So y'all know, I have a production
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: crew of all males and we all got slaved and
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: uh anyway, so you kind of know the rhythm of
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: the show and it could turn quickly. So but Ken,
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: you and I have a lot in common former pro
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: athletes and also gym owners. When I was in Houston,
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: I was in Sugarland, had a sports performing business in
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: sugar Land for about seven years. But the other thing
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: that we have in common with pks. Yeah, so I
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: want to hear about that. You know, I've talked in
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: depth in so many episodes on the other platform. What
• 3:37
  Speaker 1: was it like to be a PK. My dad is
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: still pastoring. I think he should retire at CJ. We
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: may need to make this clip so I can send
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: it to him to retire. My dad's been passing thirty
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: five years. I was like, pop, ain't no more preaching left, Like,
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: go take your resc good soldiers. It's like you've been
• 3:58
  Speaker 1: do it hardship, as Paul said, go get your rest. Man. So, man,
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: how was it for you growing up as a PK.
• 4:07
  Speaker 3: As a kid, it was like, man, I want to
• 4:10
  Speaker 3: do more.
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: I want to go here, I want to do that.
• 4:11
  Speaker 4: But then as an adult, now I'm looking like, man,
• 4:13
  Speaker 4: you saved me from this. You kept me from this,
• 4:15
  Speaker 4: you kept me from that, you know. So just going
• 4:18
  Speaker 4: to church. I'm at church every day.
• 4:20
  Speaker 3: My granddad was a pastor, so my mom and dad
• 4:22
  Speaker 3: was the worship leadist.
• 4:24
  Speaker 4: Wow.
• 4:24
  Speaker 3: So I'm at five years old, six years old, I'm
• 4:27
  Speaker 3: playing drums.
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: So I'm a drummer. So are we, brothers. I'm a drummer. Wow.
• 4:34
  Speaker 4: So yeah, you know, playing drums, revival here, revival, every
• 4:40
  Speaker 4: you know, rehearsal, shut in all of that good stuff.
• 4:43
  Speaker 4: So man, I would say, and me and my brothers
• 4:48
  Speaker 4: talk about this man, we ain't have a childhood. We
• 4:51
  Speaker 4: just was in church all the time. Most of the kids,
• 4:53
  Speaker 4: like my son, now, my son experienced so much mom
• 4:56
  Speaker 4: playing Little League football, running track.
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: I had it.
• 5:00
  Speaker 3: Wow, it was church, you know. Oh we got to
• 5:03
  Speaker 3: got a rehearsal.
• 5:04
  Speaker 4: And our church was like let's say, from Houston to Austin,
• 5:08
  Speaker 4: whoa every every day every other day because that drive
• 5:12
  Speaker 4: from Houston also for about hour thirty Yeah, being on track.
• 5:17
  Speaker 4: So my granddad church was in Pahokee, Florida. That's the Everglades. Okay,
• 5:21
  Speaker 4: we're coming from Hollywood, Florida.
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: I just left Hollywood. So hold on, y'all, was driving
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: from Hollywood to the Everglade.
• 5:27
  Speaker 4: Yeah, told saw true. Imagine we got a seven day
• 5:32
  Speaker 4: revival and then got to be the school the next morning. Man,
• 5:37
  Speaker 4: me and my mom just talked about this.
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: Uh, I was struggling to stay awaken class and one
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: of my teachers that called my mom and said, yo,
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: he's struggling. And my mom told my dad that kids
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: cannot go anymore, like they got to stay home. So man,
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: so what what what was that like? Man? Too? You
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: know have a childhood because my parents were married fifteen
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: years until they divorced. But man, the challenge dude with
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: a feeling like man? Our childhood was not regular? Whoa
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: so like again?
• 6:21
  Speaker 4: Even though it wasn't regular, I'm blessed to have a
• 6:24
  Speaker 4: nun I say, a non regular if that's a word.
• 6:27
  Speaker 4: Childhood being it saved me from so much, you know,
• 6:30
  Speaker 4: while I'm at church, just say middle school or high school.
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: Man.
• 6:34
  Speaker 3: You know, John just got went to jail, he just
• 6:36
  Speaker 3: got shot.
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: He was breaking in somebody else.
• 6:38
  Speaker 4: And John, that's my boy, and I probably would have
• 6:40
  Speaker 4: been outside playing.
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: With him or you know, on some stuff like that.
• 6:43
  Speaker 4: So being able to be able to be at church
• 6:46
  Speaker 4: while crazy stuff is going on, and you know that
• 6:50
  Speaker 4: it saved me from a lot of stuff, you know,
• 6:52
  Speaker 4: and the childhood just from being being in church.
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: I just said, it kept me.
• 6:58
  Speaker 3: It kept me from a lot.
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: Do you feel in some ways? I did feel like
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: this early on, and I think I talked a little
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: bit about this in the last episode. I feel like
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: there's this dissonance, this lack of harmony that we often
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: feel because regular is not common for us. Because when
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: you're growing up in church, you hear set aside, set apart,
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: and of course now in my forties. I can see
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: that being set apart, as you say, was protection. I
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: know I went through this as a man feeling restricted.
• 7:38
  Speaker 1: And again I'm always transparent and open because I was
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: glad that my mother like I didn't you know, and
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: I always talked to guys like I was a late
• 7:48
  Speaker 1: blowing you know. I was a virgin all the way
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: through high school. I think until I got to college.
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: Do you feel like for growing up in the church,
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: you know, feeling restricted and then also feeling like we
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: couldn't do certain things, and then there was also this
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: magnifying glass that was on our lives where it was
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: you felt like you were constantly under a microscope. I
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: got a teacher called my mom for I used to
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: love the be box when I was in school. I
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: was good at it because I played drum. Yeah, oh yeah,
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell my age. Yeah, I would be forty
• 8:20
  Speaker 1: four and I don't look, I don't look the numbers.
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: So we were doing good. But man, a teacher called
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: my mom and said, your son is acting like the world.
• 8:32
  Speaker 1: What bro When I tell you? That broke me? And
• 8:36
  Speaker 1: at that moment, Ken, I felt like, what can we do?
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: I can't be box? What moments in your life where
• 8:44
  Speaker 1: you felt because of the try of how you was raised. Reard,
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: let's go there. It's a funny, funny, funny thing coming up.
• 8:58
  Speaker 4: You know, my grandparents, the old school, they play We
• 9:01
  Speaker 4: played tunk and they play spade and stuff like that.
• 9:07
  Speaker 4: That was considered gambling cars. So we couldn't touch playing cars.
• 9:12
  Speaker 4: All we could play was Uno and Chuckers. So I'm like, man,
• 9:17
  Speaker 4: so we can't play.
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: With these cars because we go to church. These is
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: the devil car. It was. It was just like stuff
• 9:22
  Speaker 1: like that that.
• 9:23
  Speaker 4: Kept me wondering, like, man, do I really want to
• 9:27
  Speaker 4: be you know, do I really want to live this
• 9:30
  Speaker 4: type of life?
• 9:30
  Speaker 3: Or do I really want to be like this all
• 9:32
  Speaker 3: my life?
• 9:33
  Speaker 1: You know what I mean? Just from little things like
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: that coming up.
• 9:35
  Speaker 4: It's like, man, we can't play cars, but they can
• 9:38
  Speaker 4: dice and touch dices.
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: It's all, hell, yeah, you gambling monopoly. Yeah you know
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: what I'm saying.
• 9:45
  Speaker 3: So it was like we couldn't touch it, couldn't really
• 9:48
  Speaker 3: touch nothing.
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: It was Uno and Chuckers y'all. You know, little games
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: like that. And I'm speaking on the game aspect, you know,
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: it's right. It's just just those little things all. How
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: beneficial is that for where you are now? And we'll
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: get into like the healing and after football and all
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: those different things. How beneficial is that to you now
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: as an adult man? It's very beneficial. Again, it preserved me.
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: I love that word. It preserved me.
• 10:26
  Speaker 3: I really don't even have It's just it preserved.
• 10:28
  Speaker 4: It kept me from a lot man, just growing up
• 10:31
  Speaker 4: in South Florida and the things that I could have
• 10:33
  Speaker 4: got into and the things.
• 10:34
  Speaker 1: I got into and got out of. God, it preserved it.
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: And to be the person I am on the day
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: when was the first time you experienced God for yourself?
• 10:46
  Speaker 4: Playing the drums and I don't know what touched me
• 10:51
  Speaker 4: in just the Holy got over me playing the drums. Also, well,
• 10:58
  Speaker 4: I was at my grandma house one night. Then I
• 11:00
  Speaker 4: got shorter breath and ended up having an asthma attack
• 11:05
  Speaker 4: and got intubated. I was down for probably like a
• 11:08
  Speaker 4: couple of weeks. And I know it's only the grace
• 11:13
  Speaker 4: of God that got me out of there.
• 11:15
  Speaker 1: Yeah, right, And then it happened.
• 11:20
  Speaker 4: It happened like in the January every time. Wh's crazy?
• 11:24
  Speaker 4: Is it happened again?
• 11:26
  Speaker 3: Were even worse when I moved to Houston, got intubated again.
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: I was down. I was in a coma for like I'll.
• 11:32
  Speaker 3: Say, twelve days in a coma to day.
• 11:35
  Speaker 1: I was a freshman.
• 11:36
  Speaker 4: I transferred from Florida International, came here to play football.
• 11:40
  Speaker 3: I caught the flu. It was when the flu was
• 11:43
  Speaker 3: really bad.
• 11:43
  Speaker 4: It was a bird flu or not bird flu, some
• 11:45
  Speaker 4: type of big food that came to Houston and I
• 11:47
  Speaker 4: caught that. Plus I have asthma. So took me down,
• 11:52
  Speaker 4: took me out, and so I'm in Ben Talk.
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: First of all, oh you had been talk. You made
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: have been tired. That's a grace of guys. Most people
• 12:00
  Speaker 1: going Ben Top don't come out, so listen. So sorry,
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: Ben Top. That's just everybody used to know y. Don't
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: have them take you to Don't let them folks take
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: you to Ben Top.
• 12:09
  Speaker 3: So the crazy thing was, I I'm I'm in my
• 12:12
  Speaker 3: football dorm.
• 12:13
  Speaker 4: I hit my guy. I said, a bri, I need
• 12:15
  Speaker 4: to go to the hospital in Hell is not working. Man,
• 12:19
  Speaker 4: Just take something. So he was like, just take it again.
• 12:22
  Speaker 4: So I took it again and I called a friend
• 12:24
  Speaker 4: of mine. She brought me some robotuesting. I joked with
• 12:26
  Speaker 4: her this day I'm like you tried to kill me.
• 12:28
  Speaker 4: You bruing me, robotuting and robotesting. It did something to
• 12:31
  Speaker 4: my lobby and yeah, so I don't know. I asked
• 12:35
  Speaker 4: me at histon meant or whatever that was in it.
• 12:36
  Speaker 4: But anyways, got to the hospital. All I remember is
• 12:43
  Speaker 4: saying my name day the birth boom.
• 12:46
  Speaker 3: That was it.
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: I woke up.
• 12:48
  Speaker 4: I'm looking up at the ceiling. I was inturbated for
• 12:52
  Speaker 4: like twelve days.
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: Why are you sit there? Coma twelve days? You come out?
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: What's your thoughts?
• 13:04
  Speaker 4: It was spiritual and I could tell you why we're
• 13:07
  Speaker 4: laying in the bed. After I came to, I saw
• 13:13
  Speaker 4: and my my mom took the picture.
• 13:15
  Speaker 3: My mom took the picture. It was some doctors outside
• 13:18
  Speaker 3: of the window.
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: They was giving me two days to live.
• 13:22
  Speaker 4: Two days to live because after well after I was
• 13:25
  Speaker 4: still on a breathing machine.
• 13:27
  Speaker 3: But they was like, we don't know if his moms
• 13:29
  Speaker 3: will be able to you know, hold or whatever. So
• 13:33
  Speaker 3: they gave me a couple of days to live.
• 13:34
  Speaker 4: So after that, my mom she took a picture, and
• 13:41
  Speaker 4: so I had that picture to this day on my phone.
• 13:43
  Speaker 4: I look at it probably once a year. That night
• 13:47
  Speaker 4: I went to sleep, I woke up. I see this
• 13:51
  Speaker 4: death age floating. I'm like, I look up again. I'm like,
• 13:57
  Speaker 4: what She's an angel, just like a black and it
• 14:02
  Speaker 4: was just floating, just laughing, just laughing.
• 14:04
  Speaker 3: I'm like, I'm looking, I'm praying, I'm looking.
• 14:09
  Speaker 4: I was like, I know, God got me. I know
• 14:11
  Speaker 4: you got me. I know That's all I kept saying,
• 14:14
  Speaker 4: I know you got me. I just like i'ma just
• 14:16
  Speaker 4: go to sleep. I just closed my eyes, went to sleep.
• 14:18
  Speaker 4: Woke up the next morning. I mean to you and
• 14:23
  Speaker 4: my but I woke up the next morning them pulling
• 14:24
  Speaker 4: the captor out of me. I was back, my lums
• 14:29
  Speaker 4: was good, everything was good. Mom and prayed it was.
• 14:34
  Speaker 4: It just everything just happened just like that. The next morning,
• 14:37
  Speaker 4: like everything just cleared up. Every it was just a
• 14:39
  Speaker 4: new day, do everything. But that night I just saw
• 14:43
  Speaker 4: death and it was Man. That was That was one
• 14:47
  Speaker 4: of the I wouldn't say scariest, but it was. It
• 14:51
  Speaker 4: was a life changing moment. Every time I passed about
• 14:55
  Speaker 4: being talked like I used to run. You know we
• 14:56
  Speaker 4: run around Herman Park. I wouldn't run that way. I
• 15:00
  Speaker 4: cut through through the because you know it's three miles.
• 15:03
  Speaker 4: We running around the whole thing. I cut through and
• 15:05
  Speaker 4: go through the golf course because I didn't want to
• 15:07
  Speaker 4: see that that hospital. I didn't want to you know,
• 15:10
  Speaker 4: it left the trauma.
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but yeah, what do you So obviously God spiritual life,
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: and you make an answer this you may not because
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: healing not only is such a journey, but I feel
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: like it's such a continuous process that we're constantly discovering.
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: Why do you think God left you here?
• 15:35
  Speaker 4: Uh?
• 15:35
  Speaker 1: My workers start there.
• 15:38
  Speaker 4: I should have been gone before this shootout and stuff
• 15:43
  Speaker 4: that I just recently told my mom from living in Miami.
• 15:46
  Speaker 4: But yeah, I should have been gone, But I know
• 15:51
  Speaker 4: God got more for me. Yeah, you got a lot
• 15:54
  Speaker 4: of stuff on me.
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah, as you sit back and you reflect and you
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: made the pivot after football and you know you own
• 16:04
  Speaker 1: this gym, and we were talking about this. I think
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: one of the things that we don't have the opportunity
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: to talk about as successful black men is oftentimes we
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: don't have a blueprint on how to live when we
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: arrive at that place of success. So that's so much
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: that is happening, right because with the success becomes the
• 16:25
  Speaker 1: access and then it has the power it has you know,
• 16:34
  Speaker 1: this sort of aura of rounder and people are attracted
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: to you. You know, I often my mentor tell me
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: all the time, he said, listen, everything annoying and is
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: like a magnet. It draws everything and it draws all metal.
• 16:50
  Speaker 1: What has it been like for you to try to
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: navigate being one of the top gym owners in Houston,
• 16:57
  Speaker 1: a very successful gym because you and I have made
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: the pivot after football and we've been successful in our
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: second career. What has that been like to manage that.
• 17:07
  Speaker 4: Well coming out of that pivot.
• 17:12
  Speaker 1: I mean, like, you know, it's a dark spot after football.
• 17:17
  Speaker 4: It's like, dang, I thought I was gonna go to
• 17:18
  Speaker 4: the league, or I thought I was gonna play even.
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: You know more.
• 17:21
  Speaker 4: You know, you in that little area, that little great area,
• 17:25
  Speaker 4: trying to figure life out.
• 17:27
  Speaker 1: But you know, guy had more in store for me.
• 17:29
  Speaker 4: And it was always it was always fitted. Its always
• 17:33
  Speaker 4: came back to fitness. You know.
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: I had multiple jobs.
• 17:37
  Speaker 4: I did CPS because I love kids, so I want
• 17:40
  Speaker 4: to see, like, oh, I want to help, you know,
• 17:42
  Speaker 4: bring bring families back together.
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: I did CPS, just.
• 17:47
  Speaker 4: Randomly got laid off, but I was training people on
• 17:50
  Speaker 4: the side that kept going, that kept building.
• 17:53
  Speaker 3: But I'm trying to run away from that and all right, let.
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: Me find this other job.
• 17:58
  Speaker 4: Okay, uh, but again, then I get an offer. I
• 18:02
  Speaker 4: got a master's Now, So at this point, because I
• 18:06
  Speaker 4: graduated college and I got my master's degree while playing
• 18:09
  Speaker 4: arena football, I was like, well, let me get I
• 18:13
  Speaker 4: get an offer from Ben Todd wow to be an administrator.
• 18:19
  Speaker 4: But I got a master's in healthcare administration. Yeah, so
• 18:21
  Speaker 4: I'm like, okay, I'm about to take this. So I
• 18:26
  Speaker 4: got the email about the reply back to the email.
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: Computer crash. So right, I need to figure out.
• 18:35
  Speaker 4: I don't know who to call, who to talk to,
• 18:38
  Speaker 4: And between that time I'm training people and my training.
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: Some just told me like, just leave it alone.
• 18:44
  Speaker 4: I just walked away, point blank, just walked away from
• 18:47
  Speaker 4: healthcare and went straight into the fitness.
• 18:49
  Speaker 1: I trained this one guy.
• 18:50
  Speaker 3: This guy was like, hey, my sister got a building
• 18:53
  Speaker 3: in third world.
• 18:54
  Speaker 4: I don't know if you're gonna like it, but just
• 18:56
  Speaker 4: you know, try it out.
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: I was like, I don't know, I'll try.
• 19:01
  Speaker 4: You know.
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: My thing was I didn't even want to jump.
• 19:05
  Speaker 4: I just really want to train people, you know, and
• 19:07
  Speaker 4: make people better, because that's that's what made me feel good,
• 19:09
  Speaker 4: serve being a server, the servicing people and actually servicing
• 19:15
  Speaker 4: and training people. So once I got the building, it
• 19:18
  Speaker 4: grew just kept growing, kept growing, kept growing, and.
• 19:24
  Speaker 1: From there.
• 19:26
  Speaker 4: The I guess the attention and you know, all of
• 19:30
  Speaker 4: that stuff started coming. You know, Oh that's Ken, that's
• 19:33
  Speaker 4: the guy from then I went pro bodybuilding in like
• 19:36
  Speaker 4: one year. So it's like more attention. So now it's like, okay,
• 19:39
  Speaker 4: you got you.
• 19:40
  Speaker 1: Under the microscope.
• 19:41
  Speaker 4: Then, like you said, that magnet like you you got
• 19:45
  Speaker 4: women at your neck, you got you know, all types
• 19:49
  Speaker 4: of the opportunities at your neck. You know, hell, I'm
• 19:52
  Speaker 4: off you this, I want to do this, I want
• 19:54
  Speaker 4: to do and so now it's like I had to
• 19:56
  Speaker 4: pray for discernment.
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: Mm hmm. So talk about that man, because we you know,
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: my eyes were starting the water because as you're talking,
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: I feel myself because I was telling Bishop Jake this,
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: I said, Bishop. The challenge with most of us that
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: God gives us an annoying team, whether yours is training
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: and fitness and healthcare, minds is mental health, and which
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: is still fitness of the mind, I said, Bishop. The
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: challenge with guys like you and I, we don't often
• 20:32
  Speaker 1: run into a Samuel. We don't run into men who
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: can help guide us. We often meet a lot of salts,
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: let us see something in us that knows that's something
• 20:44
  Speaker 1: about us that's unique, that's you're different. And rather than
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: helping us, they're trying to kill us. And Bishop just
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: he just he was just he was just like just
• 20:53
  Speaker 1: like quiet, like, oh, that's I said, Bishop No, I said.
• 20:57
  Speaker 1: Success is still new to men, because how do you
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: manage winning when losing what's your normal norm? Nobody talks
• 21:10
  Speaker 1: about how do you manage winning? How do you manage
• 21:14
  Speaker 1: that everything is coming at you, that people that you
• 21:18
  Speaker 1: have once admired And I'm I know for me, I'm
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: I'm I've had women that I'm like, I watch you,
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: I seen you in this movie. Now they in your
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: d M s and they like, yo, dot, I see
• 21:28
  Speaker 1: you you know here, like would you like to grab coffee?
• 21:31
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, and AND's and and and that there's
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: and and it's not so much about the flattery. It's
• 21:40
  Speaker 1: like now processing because of my own drama, my trauma
• 21:44
  Speaker 1: in previous relationships, like how do I say no?
• 21:48
  Speaker 4: If I say no, do I feel that is it
• 21:50
  Speaker 4: making me feel like.
• 21:51
  Speaker 3: I'm all I'm making like I'm all of that.
• 21:53
  Speaker 1: Or brother, come on, come on, come on here, brother.
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: I cannot tell you how you be there just to
• 21:59
  Speaker 1: beat Yeah, you was just like you drinking coffee like man,
• 22:02
  Speaker 1: I don't even here. You don't even want to be there.
• 22:09
  Speaker 1: You just brother, that's it, CJ. How many times can
• 22:12
  Speaker 1: I cannot tell you how many times? Because let me
• 22:14
  Speaker 1: say this, brother, just because it's available doesn't mean it's permissible. Ken.
• 22:21
  Speaker 1: There so many times I've said no, and I've had
• 22:25
  Speaker 1: women literally go at my neck. I had a lady
• 22:28
  Speaker 1: tell me, she said, who the hell you think you are?
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: She says, nobody's telling me no. First thing, I ain't
• 22:33
  Speaker 1: go to what you must be dad, Brother, I cannot
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: tell you my close matter of fact, a close friend
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: of mine I was just talking to yesterday. Yesterday we
• 22:47
  Speaker 1: was talking about an hour she is. She is a celebrities,
• 22:53
  Speaker 1: a celebrity voice coach. She works with UH singers, speakers,
• 22:58
  Speaker 1: and she's a backup singer for like something everybody. She
• 23:00
  Speaker 1: literally said, she was like, she's like, Jay, do you
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: remember I was telling you about such and such an
• 23:05
  Speaker 1: action about you? I said, yeah, because you know she
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: matters She lives in Florida. I was just just left Florida,
• 23:10
  Speaker 1: she says. She asked me, She's like, is Jay Gang?
• 23:17
  Speaker 3: Bro.
• 23:17
  Speaker 1: I cannot tell you how many times my sexuality has
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: been questioned because I'm saying no, because I said no.
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: And when she said that, I said, and you know,
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: the lady is a nice looking lady. She's like, I
• 23:31
  Speaker 1: just find it interesting that he doesn't respond and just
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: like and then then she went into did you hear
• 23:38
  Speaker 1: out the way he speaks? I think there's something like
• 23:41
  Speaker 1: with his sexuality and brother, when I tell you, man,
• 23:45
  Speaker 1: I bro, I'd be going through so much stuff behind
• 23:48
  Speaker 1: the scenes, man, And I'm not a person who just
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: get on so like I would never unhurry anything on
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: social media like oh I'm going through this or this
• 23:55
  Speaker 1: or that. I just sat there on the phone just
• 23:58
  Speaker 1: like this is crazy. My discipline to say no makes
• 24:03
  Speaker 1: you question my sexuality. That's crazy. And I'm gonna tell
• 24:07
  Speaker 1: you how much that's a burden because there's times that,
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: again I've gone to the lunch, didn't want to be
• 24:13
  Speaker 1: there because I'm in my mind, I'm like, dang, mm hmm,
• 24:23
  Speaker 1: what does that weight feel like to you? Man?
• 24:26
  Speaker 3: Honest now, it's a waste of time.
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: It's a waste of.
• 24:32
  Speaker 4: Being where we're at now, right, I look at it
• 24:35
  Speaker 4: as it's a waste of time. It's a waste of
• 24:37
  Speaker 4: I can be putting my energy into something else, something else,
• 24:41
  Speaker 4: you know what I mean. I can be shooting content,
• 24:45
  Speaker 4: writing a plan for you know, the next sessions that
• 24:49
  Speaker 4: I ever.
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: So it's just something.
• 24:50
  Speaker 4: Better, you know, playing reading my Bible, reading up, the
• 24:55
  Speaker 4: taking care of my son or something like that, anything
• 24:57
  Speaker 4: else in that nature.
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: But to be wasting time with something.
• 25:00
  Speaker 3: That you know that's not going to be fruitful to you.
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: If that word fruitful, because I've seen fruits on the trees,
• 25:10
  Speaker 1: but they ain't lively fruits. They really dead. They look good, Yeah,
• 25:15
  Speaker 1: they look appealing and it looks appeasing, but man, and
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: you grab it and there's no real seed in it,
• 25:23
  Speaker 1: because you could determine the fruit by the fruit having
• 25:25
  Speaker 1: seeds in it. And I've seen fruit that looks like fruit.
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: And when you get to you said, this is dead
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: with with with brothers, like where we are man? You know,
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: and you've been on your heeling journey, what what are
• 25:41
  Speaker 1: some of the things that you had to sort of
• 25:44
  Speaker 1: come to grips with in your healing process, learning how
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: to heal. Right, can I put it?
• 25:53
  Speaker 4: So when people think of healing, they think of it's
• 25:56
  Speaker 4: a quick fix almost like Wolf Ring, Woover Ring get hit,
• 26:02
  Speaker 4: he gets scratched, he hears immediately and he's back to normal.
• 26:06
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 26:07
  Speaker 4: So the same thing with healing. It's like those bruises,
• 26:11
  Speaker 4: those those lumps that I took, and the things that
• 26:13
  Speaker 4: I've been through. It's not just the oh I'm here
• 26:17
  Speaker 4: real quick over a weekend, you know, It's that takes
• 26:21
  Speaker 4: years sometimes you know, months, years, sometimes decades to heal from,
• 26:25
  Speaker 4: you know, certain days, prayer, fasting, all types of things
• 26:29
  Speaker 4: like that, just to heal from.
• 26:30
  Speaker 1: So that's basically where I'm met with it, Like I
• 26:35
  Speaker 1: do you do you feel men have the grace of Hell? Nah,
• 26:39
  Speaker 1: we don't. We gotta keep on. It's okay, you.
• 26:43
  Speaker 3: Good, come on, you go stay strong, be strong.
• 26:46
  Speaker 4: And I grasped living like that for years until like
• 26:51
  Speaker 4: now I'm really recognizing, like I gotta put me first.
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: I gotta I gotta hear because.
• 26:58
  Speaker 3: If I do on Hell, it's gonna come out one
• 27:00
  Speaker 3: with the other.
• 27:01
  Speaker 4: It is gonna come out doing my work, or it's
• 27:05
  Speaker 4: gonna come out just by the things that I do
• 27:09
  Speaker 4: or things that I say, you know what I mean.
• 27:11
  Speaker 4: I don't want to.
• 27:12
  Speaker 3: Portray nothing that I'm not, you know what I mean.
• 27:15
  Speaker 1: So we don't get the grace to heal. No, no,
• 27:21
  Speaker 1: we don't. And even now I listen to the comments,
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: you know, I read the comments, and I'm hearing so
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: many women. Men need to heal. Black men, y'all need
• 27:32
  Speaker 1: to heal. Y'all need to heal. And I was just
• 27:34
  Speaker 1: talking to a lady yesterday who writes program for black boys,
• 27:38
  Speaker 1: and I said to her, I said, listen, I wish
• 27:42
  Speaker 1: that you guys were just like just really like just
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: calm down with men need to heal, because it's not
• 27:50
  Speaker 1: that men need to heal. Men have to be given
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: the space to heal. And then you can't want me
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: to heal for you, right, because there's a lot of
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: women like you don't want him heal for himself. You
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: want him heal baby, so he can be this this man,
• 28:07
  Speaker 1: this idea you know what I mean, That that that
• 28:09
  Speaker 1: that you have have have constructed in your your head
• 28:13
  Speaker 1: because to heal from childhood trauma and to heal from
• 28:17
  Speaker 1: the suffering of the memories, because that's that's really what
• 28:22
  Speaker 1: gets us. It's the memories of the pain. And I
• 28:27
  Speaker 1: was saying to her, I said, we don't have time
• 28:32
  Speaker 1: to heal, Like when when I watch how you and
• 28:37
  Speaker 1: I are coachable because we played sports, I've had coaches.
• 28:41
  Speaker 1: You know, they gonna talk to you crazy. They don't
• 28:43
  Speaker 1: talk about your mama, they will talk about everybody. They
• 28:45
  Speaker 1: don't call you email and they will call you and
• 28:46
  Speaker 1: you just sit there and and I watched, and I
• 28:50
  Speaker 1: thank God for my therapist. Man, Doctor towns amazing woman.
• 28:55
  Speaker 1: And I remember her telling me. She says, Doc, you're
• 28:59
  Speaker 1: all over the world. You're helping so many people. And
• 29:03
  Speaker 1: she said, and you are here in some marriage. But
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: she said there are some places that are still sensitive.
• 29:10
  Speaker 1: And she said, I want you to allow yourself the
• 29:13
  Speaker 1: same grace in time that you give to your clients
• 29:15
  Speaker 1: and get to everybody else. Because even I had time
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: feel the pressure like I gotta get this right now,
• 29:20
  Speaker 1: I gotta fix this now. Because I've watched how women
• 29:24
  Speaker 1: are spoken to on their healing journey. There's so much grace.
• 29:28
  Speaker 1: Take all the time you need, cut your hair, cut
• 29:30
  Speaker 1: your hair, girl, go get your new wardrobe. Us is men.
• 29:37
  Speaker 1: You got twenty four hours, nigga to get it right.
• 29:39
  Speaker 1: Get back up. You got to get back up. And
• 29:43
  Speaker 1: not realizing that this has in some way man all
• 29:51
  Speaker 1: interrupted our process of even being humans because we try
• 29:56
  Speaker 1: to be wolverine. What is the biggest journey, I mean,
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: the biggest task man, that you feel at hand as
• 30:07
  Speaker 1: you're embarking on your healing journey. Because this is the
• 30:09
  Speaker 1: first time you've just ever been on the podcast is
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: really talking and sharing what what do you feel like
• 30:17
  Speaker 1: a task on your healing journey that big can has
• 30:22
  Speaker 1: to reconcile with that little can may still be battling with.
• 30:33
  Speaker 4: I'll say more speaking how I feel, you know what
• 30:35
  Speaker 4: I mean, communicating speaking how I feel, actually be him
• 30:41
  Speaker 4: vulnerable to whoever it may be. You know what I mean,
• 30:45
  Speaker 4: not being afraid to be vulnerable or even be in
• 30:48
  Speaker 4: a space to be vulnerable. You know, you feel safe,
• 30:50
  Speaker 4: to feel safe, you know I mean, some people give
• 30:53
  Speaker 4: you a safe space, some people don't, or some people
• 30:55
  Speaker 4: make it feel like it's a safe space and then
• 30:57
  Speaker 4: they use it against you, you know.
• 31:00
  Speaker 1: So, And for the laser the watching, y'all notice that
• 31:06
  Speaker 1: it's a common I can ask us one two three, four,
• 31:09
  Speaker 1: four brothers and him six with us. I can ask
• 31:12
  Speaker 1: each one of the men have how often have they
• 31:15
  Speaker 1: felt safe when they share I guarantee all I'm gonna
• 31:18
  Speaker 1: say property. Mm hmmm, we're not. We don't have safety.
• 31:26
  Speaker 1: We often are trying to armor ourselves up for emotional
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: black mail that you're inadequacies, your proclivities, your your challenges,
• 31:43
  Speaker 1: your your your your errors. You just feel like at
• 31:48
  Speaker 1: some point at times it's going to be thrown back
• 31:51
  Speaker 1: in your face. Has that happened to you a lot
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: of times?
• 31:58
  Speaker 3: Just expressing how you feel and then it's just.
• 32:03
  Speaker 4: Throwing right back at you are using an argument, well,
• 32:06
  Speaker 4: I ain't for do this because you said this, and
• 32:08
  Speaker 4: you said that you feel like this when I do this,
• 32:10
  Speaker 4: So I'd rather not just do this instead of just
• 32:12
  Speaker 4: trying to fix the situation and do it a different
• 32:15
  Speaker 4: way or take a different approach. Most people don't do that.
• 32:19
  Speaker 4: They just throw whatever you say and you know, in
• 32:23
  Speaker 4: the fire, just be like, this is what it is
• 32:24
  Speaker 4: and this is what I'm not doing because you said
• 32:27
  Speaker 4: this and you said that, so they use what you said.
• 32:29
  Speaker 1: It gets you what would make you feel safe to
• 32:32
  Speaker 1: open up? Mm hmm. It just It just depends on
• 32:41
  Speaker 1: the person, you know, on the person and the situation.
• 32:50
  Speaker 1: It varies.
• 32:50
  Speaker 4: I can't just say this situation makes me I can
• 32:54
  Speaker 4: open up here, I can open up over here.
• 32:56
  Speaker 1: It's just it varies. It depends all the time. Yeah.
• 32:59
  Speaker 1: I think for me, what makes me feel vulnerable is
• 33:04
  Speaker 1: what makes me feel safe is that there's gonna be
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: the sort the space to be understood. Yeah, because I
• 33:15
  Speaker 1: grew up as a child who was often misunderstood. So
• 33:20
  Speaker 1: whenever I've been in relationship, it's important, it's imperative for
• 33:23
  Speaker 1: me to communicate how important for me to feel understood.
• 33:28
  Speaker 1: And feeling understood doesn't necessarily mean that you have to greet.
• 33:34
  Speaker 1: But I need to feel as if I can share
• 33:37
  Speaker 1: this and that there would be the space to say,
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: you know what, let me sit with this, because typically
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: what happens is for us as brothers, when we do
• 33:50
  Speaker 1: open up and we do share how we feel, there
• 33:57
  Speaker 1: isn't space to talk about how we feel because now
• 34:00
  Speaker 1: we have to begin to sort of console them for
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: what we said and how it made them feel. So
• 34:08
  Speaker 1: now I have to bottle all this back up again,
• 34:11
  Speaker 1: and I have to go back to that place and say,
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: you know what I'm never going to open up again.
• 34:22
  Speaker 4: It's funny, you know, it's funny, but it's not funny
• 34:26
  Speaker 4: in a way, but you know, just looking at it
• 34:28
  Speaker 4: and just understanding the whole circle of it. It's like
• 34:34
  Speaker 4: I tell you how I feel. You hear how I feel,
• 34:38
  Speaker 4: you neglect how I feel.
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: Now I gotta.
• 34:41
  Speaker 3: Cater to you because how I feel makes you feel
• 34:44
  Speaker 3: a certain way.
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: So now I got to cater to you. So now
• 34:46
  Speaker 1: my feel is a back you know. Put Yeah, Man,
• 34:50
  Speaker 1: the amount of amount of merit men that I counsel,
• 34:54
  Speaker 1: I'm talking to my brothers who love their wives, don't
• 34:57
  Speaker 1: trust them, love their wives, and don't feel safe. I've
• 35:02
  Speaker 1: had men say, brother, I'm sleeping in bed with somebody
• 35:08
  Speaker 1: that I cannot be vulnerable with. And man, I cannot
• 35:14
  Speaker 1: tell you how many times did that make me just
• 35:15
  Speaker 1: go like, oh my god. And I've had I had
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: a guy say to me he said, doctor J this
• 35:23
  Speaker 1: is gonna sound crazy. Him and his wife been married
• 35:27
  Speaker 1: for a number of years, he said, he said, I'll
• 35:33
  Speaker 1: die before I let her know how I really feel.
• 35:37
  Speaker 1: He said, I'd rather choose death. Wow, And I said,
• 35:43
  Speaker 1: and I had to sit He said, I just can't
• 35:45
  Speaker 1: bring myself to do it. And he said, I love her,
• 35:49
  Speaker 1: but he said, I don't love her enough to give
• 35:53
  Speaker 1: my stuff to her. And I often tell brothers like, man,
• 36:05
  Speaker 1: if it don't feel safe, don't open up. Use wisdom.
• 36:12
  Speaker 1: There's a difference between sharing and disclosing. There's a huge difference.
• 36:19
  Speaker 1: Some people you just share, but you can't disclose to everybody.
• 36:25
  Speaker 1: You gotta make sure people have the wisdom and the
• 36:31
  Speaker 1: maturity to hold all of you. See, I think because
• 36:37
  Speaker 1: you and I like, we'll meet people that can hold
• 36:40
  Speaker 1: parts of us, because I know I'm going to see
• 36:43
  Speaker 1: the light. Like if you can't hold all of me
• 36:45
  Speaker 1: like I can't, like we can't. Yeah, because because see
• 36:48
  Speaker 1: now we're at the stage where we prove it ourselves.
• 36:52
  Speaker 1: We will rive. But it's too costly to give you
• 36:59
  Speaker 1: certain parts of me if you if you're going to
• 37:02
  Speaker 1: mishandle them right, because it is it's costs us too
• 37:06
  Speaker 1: much to get here. What do you want your son
• 37:17
  Speaker 1: to see you?
• 37:18
  Speaker 4: Ass as he sees me now? He looks at me
• 37:23
  Speaker 4: as superman, right. I see it in his eyes when
• 37:26
  Speaker 4: we talk to his friends. It's like, oh, my daddy
• 37:29
  Speaker 4: is my dad? D I can go to a place
• 37:31
  Speaker 4: where he been. Oh hey, mister John's we heard all
• 37:34
  Speaker 4: about you. We know everything about you, Katin.
• 37:37
  Speaker 1: You know.
• 37:39
  Speaker 4: That's the that's the how he views me now is
• 37:42
  Speaker 4: just how I always want him to be, you know,
• 37:46
  Speaker 4: and introducing different things into his life as his prayer life,
• 37:50
  Speaker 4: my son in a second, Man, I'm not.
• 37:53
  Speaker 1: Feeling good, kay now, I'm laid out for a minute.
• 37:56
  Speaker 1: All right, Dad here run out day? Can I pray
• 37:59
  Speaker 1: for you? All right? Wow?
• 38:02
  Speaker 3: You know so that's I can't ask for nothing more.
• 38:07
  Speaker 1: You know that that's so powerful, brother, to have a
• 38:10
  Speaker 1: boy being able to pray, because that praying boy becomes
• 38:15
  Speaker 1: a praying man. Ye what are you doing different with
• 38:19
  Speaker 1: your son that you wish was done with you?
• 38:23
  Speaker 4: Uh? I'm actually giving him.
• 38:28
  Speaker 1: I'm not saying I didn't have the platforms be.
• 38:31
  Speaker 4: Who I wanted to be at but mine was, like
• 38:35
  Speaker 4: I told you, it was structured, it was church, it
• 38:38
  Speaker 4: was this, it was that, you know what I mean.
• 38:40
  Speaker 4: So with him, I'm letting him be who he is
• 38:43
  Speaker 4: and forming him around who he is, not that typical
• 38:49
  Speaker 4: church boy the p K. You know, I want him
• 38:54
  Speaker 4: to be who he wants to because a lot of
• 38:56
  Speaker 4: people like my mom. We had a conversation the other
• 38:58
  Speaker 4: day where people and I was like, well, I'm just
• 39:01
  Speaker 4: glad and my mom and they didn't force us to
• 39:03
  Speaker 4: go into the ministry.
• 39:04
  Speaker 1: We actually played and we you know, that's all.
• 39:07
  Speaker 4: That's all I wanted to do when I saw what
• 39:10
  Speaker 4: my granddad and my all my peoples go through as pastors,
• 39:13
  Speaker 4: and the stress and the two o'clock called pastor, I'm
• 39:16
  Speaker 4: not feeling good?
• 39:17
  Speaker 1: Can you pray for me? I'm like, pray for yourself?
• 39:19
  Speaker 1: Why did you call them my house? This? You know,
• 39:21
  Speaker 1: stuff like that.
• 39:22
  Speaker 3: That's just like I don't want that, you know what
• 39:25
  Speaker 3: I mean.
• 39:26
  Speaker 4: I'd rather just play the drums and be a I'll
• 39:29
  Speaker 4: be a youth minister, you know, take the kids to
• 39:31
  Speaker 4: chuck e cheese and you know, and minister to them
• 39:34
  Speaker 4: and teach them Bible person.
• 39:35
  Speaker 3: But the pastor in part, I don't want to do that.
• 39:38
  Speaker 4: But that that that whole dynamic is scary.
• 39:44
  Speaker 1: I'll say that it is. But hindsight, my dad he's like,
• 39:55
  Speaker 1: you are a pastor. I'm like, what you mean? He's like,
• 39:58
  Speaker 1: you want a gym hunk.
• 39:59
  Speaker 4: He's like, yeah, you organize and you tell people how
• 40:02
  Speaker 4: to do this and this, that and the other. Right,
• 40:04
  Speaker 4: you go trainings are your deacons, right, he's your front there,
• 40:08
  Speaker 4: that's your secretary. So he was basically putting everything together.
• 40:12
  Speaker 4: And it's just like how people look at the past.
• 40:14
  Speaker 4: That's how they look at me at the gym. Oh
• 40:15
  Speaker 4: that's kin, that's the Boston man. Let me do this, this, this, this?
• 40:18
  Speaker 1: Hey? What should I do for this? Hey? Can you ask?
• 40:20
  Speaker 3: Can you answer this question for me? Can you do
• 40:22
  Speaker 3: this for me?
• 40:23
  Speaker 1: You know?
• 40:23
  Speaker 4: And it's like I'm leading these people health wise, you know,
• 40:29
  Speaker 4: you know, yeah.
• 40:30
  Speaker 1: Wellness, it's ministry. Yeah. So it's ministry, yeah yeah, and
• 40:33
  Speaker 1: you know, and I often say ministry is meeting people
• 40:36
  Speaker 1: where they are. That's that's it. I mean, I think
• 40:40
  Speaker 1: you know you and I grew up. I mean even
• 40:42
  Speaker 1: till this day, man, people, I've had a h I
• 40:46
  Speaker 1: was in Canada. I just got off stage speaking to
• 40:51
  Speaker 1: the Nova Scotians. And Nova Scotians in Canada are the
• 40:55
  Speaker 1: black indigenous people that were there. They were some of
• 40:57
  Speaker 1: the first people that came off of the transit Lantic
• 41:00
  Speaker 1: trade slate ship. And I was speaking for their one
• 41:04
  Speaker 1: hundred year anniversary, a very historical event. And this lady
• 41:08
  Speaker 1: she looked. She looked white, but I think she she
• 41:11
  Speaker 1: was mixed. Anyway. I just spoke and just kind of
• 41:15
  Speaker 1: did my thing, did what I do, and uh, some
• 41:19
  Speaker 1: biblical things that I that I kind of referenced to
• 41:22
  Speaker 1: because I was talking about the historical context of how
• 41:26
  Speaker 1: they got to Canada and what became of Nova Scotia.
• 41:31
  Speaker 1: And you know, throw some comedy in there because I
• 41:33
  Speaker 1: like because you know, I talked about mental health for living,
• 41:35
  Speaker 1: so I gotta have some laughing. And there that woman
• 41:39
  Speaker 1: came up there. When you gonna stop running, baby, I said, Man,
• 41:47
  Speaker 1: She said, when are you gonna stop running? I said,
• 41:51
  Speaker 1: I said, I said, what do you be? I said,
• 41:52
  Speaker 1: I'm doing with God. She said, now it's on you.
• 41:57
  Speaker 1: You can't hide from it. And bro, I was just like, God, please,
• 42:03
  Speaker 1: because I'm with you. Brother. I I wrestle with the
• 42:07
  Speaker 1: idea of being a pastor ministry. I can do. It's
• 42:12
  Speaker 1: just that pastor stuff. Man, like I man providing therapy
• 42:18
  Speaker 1: for pastors doing COVID. See this is people don't realize
• 42:21
  Speaker 1: that was a big time like this. I saw over
• 42:23
  Speaker 1: a thousand people doing COVID like I'm like, and all
• 42:27
  Speaker 1: of them she was mostly church people. And then in
• 42:30
  Speaker 1: my training eighty percent. I'm not gonna put the church
• 42:34
  Speaker 1: name out there because they've gone through some stuff publicly,
• 42:36
  Speaker 1: but eighty percent of my clients were their members. And Bro,
• 42:41
  Speaker 1: I cannot tell you the stuff that people are bringing
• 42:42
  Speaker 1: a Bible in there, and I'm just like, that ain't
• 42:44
  Speaker 1: the Bible. That's you, That ain't the devil. Good brother,
• 42:50
  Speaker 1: that's you. You brought that on you. But just trying
• 42:53
  Speaker 1: to get people to understand that God word is His word.
• 42:58
  Speaker 1: But then as a responsible ability that you have. I
• 43:01
  Speaker 1: think Paul talked about lay aside every weight and sin,
• 43:07
  Speaker 1: and I love when I do get to speak at
• 43:10
  Speaker 1: churches because I do get to tap into my preaching
• 43:12
  Speaker 1: that and I say, you have to think sin is
• 43:15
  Speaker 1: just missing the mark, but you can have trauma that
• 43:22
  Speaker 1: you're carrying and around that becomes a weight that can
• 43:25
  Speaker 1: lead to sin. And getting people to understand that maybe
• 43:32
  Speaker 1: the sin is perpetuating in your life because you keep
• 43:34
  Speaker 1: holding on to this pain. Because what a lot of
• 43:39
  Speaker 1: us do is we'll hold on to the pain and
• 43:42
  Speaker 1: then we'll pray to God. And you can't do both.
• 43:47
  Speaker 1: You got to make a choice. You got to make
• 43:50
  Speaker 1: a choice, is what he asks a man at the pool,
• 43:53
  Speaker 1: would I be made hold? And I love That's one
• 43:56
  Speaker 1: of my favorite stories because it's like I can imagine
• 43:59
  Speaker 1: Jesus like I'm not picking you up, It's just like
• 44:02
  Speaker 1: you don't get up off this ground, and so I
• 44:05
  Speaker 1: I you know, I've wrestled with that man, and I've
• 44:08
  Speaker 1: had to embrace parts of it slowly, because what we
• 44:12
  Speaker 1: do is ministry as you're helping people achieve their goals,
• 44:17
  Speaker 1: and not just from a look aesthetically. If you're not
• 44:21
  Speaker 1: well physically, can I guarantee you your mental health is
• 44:24
  Speaker 1: not out of them? Yeah? I had a conversation with
• 44:29
  Speaker 1: my dad.
• 44:31
  Speaker 4: I'll say eighty five percent of the passes and I'm
• 44:34
  Speaker 4: speaking and the like the jurisdician that they're in any
• 44:39
  Speaker 4: church of God, eighty percent of them stomachs hanging over
• 44:43
  Speaker 4: they built, Like how can you? How can you minister
• 44:50
  Speaker 4: or teach all nations? And you know the highways and
• 44:54
  Speaker 4: byways and all of this stuff, and you unhealthy, you
• 44:57
  Speaker 4: high blood pressure? You got this is up that you
• 45:00
  Speaker 4: can kind of maintain yourself the same hereditary this is,
• 45:04
  Speaker 4: you know, stop eating those chicken dinners after service and
• 45:08
  Speaker 4: the fry fish.
• 45:09
  Speaker 1: And what's easy to point out to saying that work.
• 45:13
  Speaker 4: So my thing is you have to be healthy too.
• 45:18
  Speaker 4: I feel like you gotta you gotta be a healthy Christian,
• 45:21
  Speaker 4: like to be a Christian. I feel like that that
• 45:22
  Speaker 4: should that should.
• 45:23
  Speaker 1: Have been one of the commandments God should not overeat
• 45:27
  Speaker 1: right or that should be healthy, Like how you gonna
• 45:31
  Speaker 1: serve to be unhealthy? Like how how are you gonna
• 45:34
  Speaker 1: do that? Yeah, you know and and and I think
• 45:38
  Speaker 1: to to to your point, I think it's it's it's
• 45:40
  Speaker 1: important that we encourage the people to become whole and
• 45:46
  Speaker 1: not just hold spirraitucy, but hole in your entire body.
• 45:50
  Speaker 1: When when when God is speaking, he's talking about mind, body,
• 45:54
  Speaker 1: and spirit. And you're right, man. I've seen my boy
• 45:57
  Speaker 1: Joel Man like he has a conference and he's he's
• 46:00
  Speaker 1: like you big in the fitness man, and he said,
• 46:03
  Speaker 1: I'm tired of saying these fat preachers. Mhm.
• 46:06
  Speaker 4: You know.
• 46:09
  Speaker 1: J T A b throw you under the buzz and
• 46:11
  Speaker 1: good brother, but it's real and I get it. You
• 46:22
  Speaker 1: could tell you you know you because the seeing that
• 46:25
  Speaker 1: you can see right, Ah, he's smoking, he's this, or
• 46:28
  Speaker 1: she's that, but you're over eating. And let me tell
• 46:32
  Speaker 1: you something I noticed from somebody who who? Who? Like I?
• 46:35
  Speaker 1: You know, I'm fasting now, but at one point in time,
• 46:39
  Speaker 1: I was fasting a lot. I don't know how you
• 46:42
  Speaker 1: hear from God with all that on your stomach. I'm serious,
• 46:48
  Speaker 1: I don't know how, right, I don't know how. It's
• 46:51
  Speaker 1: a lot, yes, a lot of clues. You cannot tell
• 46:55
  Speaker 1: me you are hearing from God CEJ with all that,
• 46:58
  Speaker 1: you cannot tell me that that's you talking.
• 47:01
  Speaker 3: And if you are, you hear him telling you get healthy.
• 47:05
  Speaker 1: Come on, now, you hearing all these words from me
• 47:07
  Speaker 1: and you ain't heard him say push that plate away?
• 47:11
  Speaker 1: But you heard him tell me. He's calling you into
• 47:13
  Speaker 1: a new season. He's calling you to a new diet.
• 47:19
  Speaker 1: I'm just being honest. Man. If we're gonna talk about it,
• 47:22
  Speaker 1: let's talk about it. But he's calling you into a
• 47:25
  Speaker 1: new lifestyle. Good brother, good sister. Come on now, we're
• 47:28
  Speaker 1: gonna do minishure. Let's go all the way with it.
• 47:30
  Speaker 1: I got my good brother here, kid, Listen, I don't
• 47:33
  Speaker 1: live in Houston no more. But I'm telling you Ken
• 47:35
  Speaker 1: to me. Ken and her son, y'all are two of
• 47:38
  Speaker 1: the best of me. And he was, you know, shout
• 47:41
  Speaker 1: out to big brother, coach your son. You and Ken
• 47:44
  Speaker 1: are some of the best to do it because y'all
• 47:46
  Speaker 1: live what y'all speak about, man, and y'all a great
• 47:48
  Speaker 1: example for brothers. Because you know I was just saying this.
• 47:54
  Speaker 1: You know I didn't see black men age well. I
• 47:59
  Speaker 1: saw black men die earlier and the women outlived the men.
• 48:03
  Speaker 1: In fact, the New Life expectancy the age by the
• 48:10
  Speaker 1: CDC for black men in sixty seven sixty seven, and
• 48:17
  Speaker 1: then I know right now if we were to go
• 48:19
  Speaker 1: to South Dallas, that number drops a sixty. Wow. So
• 48:26
  Speaker 1: to have brothers like you and I talking about healing,
• 48:29
  Speaker 1: talking with my mental health, talking about fitness, it's in power.
• 48:34
  Speaker 1: In closing, Kim, what do you want men to know
• 48:37
  Speaker 1: because you're on your journey. What would you say to
• 48:41
  Speaker 1: the men that are needing to heal, needing to face themselves?
• 48:47
  Speaker 1: What would you say to that brother?
• 48:50
  Speaker 4: Heal on your own paste, right, don't rush your healing
• 48:55
  Speaker 4: because someone else wants you to be who they want
• 48:58
  Speaker 4: you to be, Les say, heal on your own pace.
• 49:01
  Speaker 4: You know it's not a timeb on healer. You know,
• 49:05
  Speaker 4: it's not a it's not a date, it's not.
• 49:08
  Speaker 1: You know, So just heal on your own pace.
• 49:11
  Speaker 3: That's that's how.
• 49:14
  Speaker 1: What words of wisdom would you get to that brother
• 49:18
  Speaker 1: Uh that says Kien, I'm gonna be healing on my pace.
• 49:21
  Speaker 1: How would you encourage him to stay on the journey?
• 49:25
  Speaker 1: Mm hmm.
• 49:30
  Speaker 4: I will always add I will always add God to
• 49:32
  Speaker 4: to that that circle of Uh in that pace, you know,
• 49:36
  Speaker 4: running side.
• 49:37
  Speaker 1: It's a marathon, right, so get me running right next
• 49:41
  Speaker 1: to him.
• 49:41
  Speaker 3: So I had God and everything that I do, so
• 49:44
  Speaker 3: I seek His face on everything.
• 49:46
  Speaker 1: That I do. Say that's part of gain. See his
• 49:48
  Speaker 1: face and all that seek his face. One of my
• 49:51
  Speaker 1: favorite scripts in the Bible with David says, as I
• 49:55
  Speaker 1: keep my eyes on God, I won't trip over my
• 49:57
  Speaker 1: own feet. If I keep my eyes on Him, I
• 50:03
  Speaker 1: won't trip over my own feet. And you're telling brothers
• 50:07
  Speaker 1: that pace yourself as you're healing and seek God in
• 50:12
  Speaker 1: the process.
• 50:15
  Speaker 4: M don't just stagnant though in the in the hill.
• 50:18
  Speaker 4: You know something be guys will be in that healing
• 50:21
  Speaker 4: process and just I'm gonna just stay right here and
• 50:23
  Speaker 4: get comfortable in that little space. It's still more to go,
• 50:26
  Speaker 4: you know, it's still more healing to be done.
• 50:29
  Speaker 1: You know, yeah, I want I want to say thank you, brother,
• 50:34
  Speaker 1: and I'll give you this man, because when I'm getting
• 50:39
  Speaker 1: brothers on on the podcast, man, it's it's not only
• 50:46
  Speaker 1: is it empowering, but it's humbling because you know, brothers
• 50:49
  Speaker 1: just like you know, to get brothers to just talk,
• 50:52
  Speaker 1: you know, is it's not easy. But then also to
• 50:55
  Speaker 1: get brothers to be open. And I just want to say, Man,
• 50:58
  Speaker 1: as you're on your journey, man, it's okay if you
• 51:04
  Speaker 1: have to go back to the little boy and remind
• 51:07
  Speaker 1: him of some things that happened that the man doesn't
• 51:13
  Speaker 1: have to pay for it. That makes sense because sometimes
• 51:18
  Speaker 1: we can punish our adult self for something that should
• 51:22
  Speaker 1: have been corrected in our childhood and now we're either
• 51:28
  Speaker 1: wearing the scars or the trauma from what has happened
• 51:34
  Speaker 1: is now exacerbating certain symptoms, you know, because there's a
• 51:40
  Speaker 1: lot that God has put into your head and put
• 51:42
  Speaker 1: into your responsibility. And what I would say, man, is
• 51:47
  Speaker 1: I'm proud of you brother, for he was just coming
• 51:49
  Speaker 1: here today to share. And I hope that the people
• 51:53
  Speaker 1: who see this and watch this are encouraged because you know,
• 52:00
  Speaker 1: there are some men that are not go just be
• 52:03
  Speaker 1: open and say they're healing. R Everybody's not gonna put
• 52:06
  Speaker 1: this stuff out there that not everybody's not gonna come
• 52:10
  Speaker 1: out here and say, Man, I was this you know,
• 52:14
  Speaker 1: or I was that you know and this that you know?
• 52:17
  Speaker 1: This will happening. Like there there's some things that I
• 52:19
  Speaker 1: I I've said to my therapist that I've never said
• 52:22
  Speaker 1: on stage and never will. There's some experiences that I've
• 52:24
  Speaker 1: had in my childhood that I've said to my to
• 52:27
  Speaker 1: my therapist because it was safe there, right. And I
• 52:31
  Speaker 1: just wanna encourage you, brother, continue to to follow God
• 52:35
  Speaker 1: and all that you're doing, because God is definitely going
• 52:38
  Speaker 1: to bless all that your hands touched as you keep
• 52:41
  Speaker 1: him there. And I pray a wall of protection around
• 52:46
  Speaker 1: this receive like I prayed for a wall protection around
• 52:51
  Speaker 1: your mind. And as I'm praying for that water protection,
• 52:55
  Speaker 1: I also actually God armors your heart because I know
• 53:00
  Speaker 1: good dudes when I see you one, and I'm telling
• 53:03
  Speaker 1: you from a we're not perfect men, but we have
• 53:05
  Speaker 1: good hearts. And sometimes we attract people who see our
• 53:09
  Speaker 1: good hearts and they're not coming for the right reason.
• 53:14
  Speaker 1: A lot of times they're coming because they just want
• 53:17
  Speaker 1: something from it. They're not coming to to to advance us.
• 53:21
  Speaker 1: A lot of times they're coming for us to uh
• 53:24
  Speaker 1: in some ways miss and I had to learn this, man.
• 53:28
  Speaker 1: And again I had to learn this that you know, uh,
• 53:33
  Speaker 1: people are drone to us because there's a light. Men
• 53:38
  Speaker 1: admire us, women admire us. And so many times man
• 53:43
  Speaker 1: that I because I'm just a good dude, and my
• 53:45
  Speaker 1: mama is telling me, you know, I just hate. My
• 53:47
  Speaker 1: mama is just like I just hate. Sometimes I just
• 53:49
  Speaker 1: raise you like that because because like seriously, because because
• 53:54
  Speaker 1: because you you know this now, and because I'm gonna
• 53:57
  Speaker 1: tell you like who we were when we played ball,
• 53:59
  Speaker 1: play play the ring the ball, Like when you gotta
• 54:03
  Speaker 1: be like you gotta be a nigger. You have to
• 54:08
  Speaker 1: be you cannot. In fact, you have to be there
• 54:11
  Speaker 1: for survival. You gotta be a dog. Like I literally
• 54:15
  Speaker 1: told somebody, I can never go back to that person
• 54:18
  Speaker 1: because you you can't have a brain to run full
• 54:22
  Speaker 1: speed down there and knock somebody head Like you can't
• 54:24
  Speaker 1: have a brain. And so it's like I did the
• 54:27
  Speaker 1: work to move away from this, Like every former player,
• 54:31
  Speaker 1: we all wrestle with letting that go. But then it's
• 54:34
  Speaker 1: like you get to see our hearts and we some
• 54:37
  Speaker 1: good dudes, and we are manipulated the most. Yeah, because
• 54:46
  Speaker 1: now it's like I don't want to turn that switch
• 54:48
  Speaker 1: on because because it's either or it's hard to get
• 54:53
  Speaker 1: to go back because see, if I go there, I man, listen,
• 54:57
  Speaker 1: I go there, like I I can live with the consequences.
• 55:05
  Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying. I used to say that.
• 55:07
  Speaker 1: I was like, listen, I'm the type of dude when
• 55:09
  Speaker 1: this you know, we going there, I say this, if
• 55:13
  Speaker 1: this bullet leaf has changed, I'm the type of dude
• 55:15
  Speaker 1: I can live with what's gonna happen after a lot
• 55:17
  Speaker 1: of guys can't because I just that's who I was
• 55:20
  Speaker 1: in another life. But I also my trauma made me
• 55:23
  Speaker 1: like that. And so I'm saying all that to say
• 55:26
  Speaker 1: is that I don't want your good heart to be mishandled.
• 55:31
  Speaker 1: And as I'm saying it to you, I'm saying it
• 55:33
  Speaker 1: to me that I pray that as God continues to
• 55:36
  Speaker 1: elevate us, that he sharpened our desernment even in this season.
• 55:43
  Speaker 1: Because here's the thing, people, when we are exposed and
• 55:47
  Speaker 1: what I mean exposed meaning reveal, Like every time I
• 55:51
  Speaker 1: go on a platform, and I speak, you come on here,
• 55:54
  Speaker 1: like we get exposed to a greater audience, and the
• 55:57
  Speaker 1: greater the audience, the greater the audit, like you know
• 56:02
  Speaker 1: what I'm saying. So it's like, you know, I remember
• 56:04
  Speaker 1: the first time I went on to Breakfast Club and
• 56:07
  Speaker 1: the clip went viral and I wake up, it's like
• 56:09
  Speaker 1: five thousand new followers. It's like it's like, you know,
• 56:13
  Speaker 1: it was Miss Mary from you know, across the way,
• 56:16
  Speaker 1: and now it's you know what I'm saying, such and
• 56:18
  Speaker 1: such with the blue check. Hey, I love your interview.
• 56:22
  Speaker 1: I got a son. I gotta you know what I mean.
• 56:24
  Speaker 1: It's just pray for us here those that have a
• 56:28
  Speaker 1: heart to pray, but some of y'all prayers ain't getting
• 56:30
  Speaker 1: through the ceiling. Pray for black men that are pursuing
• 56:36
  Speaker 1: what God has called him to doing that the hottest success.
• 56:38
  Speaker 1: I'm serious. I'm serious. I'm very serious. The enemy's job
• 56:45
  Speaker 1: for us is to keep us away from our covenant
• 56:49
  Speaker 1: partners number one, and secondly, man for us to four
• 56:53
  Speaker 1: feet forfeit what God really has for us. Because I
• 56:58
  Speaker 1: cannot tell you how many days, bro, I just been
• 56:59
  Speaker 1: like man just to manage all of it. To manage
• 57:03
  Speaker 1: the production team, to manage my speaking engage, to manage
• 57:07
  Speaker 1: the tour, to manage all of that, and then you're like, oh,
• 57:10
  Speaker 1: I want to be open for love. Like I'm saying,
• 57:16
  Speaker 1: this is our dudes get gotten because you just you'd
• 57:19
  Speaker 1: be like, come on, let's go. I'm being I'm being
• 57:24
  Speaker 1: so transparent. You're wonder how dudes were great purpose I'm
• 57:28
  Speaker 1: telling you, I just saw this in real time, happened
• 57:31
  Speaker 1: to somebody, and I'm going to say they picked blindly,
• 57:35
  Speaker 1: but it's like it wasn't a good choice and I'm
• 57:38
  Speaker 1: seeing the ramifications of it, you know what I mean.
• 57:41
  Speaker 1: So it's like, brother, I'm glad that you came today.
• 57:44
  Speaker 1: I hope that this is poured into you and I
• 57:47
  Speaker 1: hope that this refuel you. And I'm glad that you
• 57:51
  Speaker 1: came because I love to have conversation with brothers where
• 57:54
  Speaker 1: we get to sharpen each other's iron. That's critical for us.
• 58:01
  Speaker 1: So guys, listen, man, thank you for tuning in to
• 58:05
  Speaker 1: another episode with Just Here with Doctor j my good brother,
• 58:09
  Speaker 1: Ken Jones. Man. Appreciate you. Brother. Listen, y'all go check
• 58:12
  Speaker 1: out Level one Fitness down in Houston, Texas. One of
• 58:16
  Speaker 1: my favorite gems, my good brother Ken Jones. Listen as
• 58:22
  Speaker 1: Ken was just sharing and this is for both men
• 58:24
  Speaker 1: and women. He'll let your pace. Do not let anyone
• 58:29
  Speaker 1: rush your process. The worst thing that you could do
• 58:34
  Speaker 1: is feel rushing your process and you go before the
• 58:38
  Speaker 1: doctor release you, you can cause even more harm and damage.
• 58:43
  Speaker 1: Trust your process, whatever that is. Always, always, always, always
• 58:49
  Speaker 1: remember this. And this is our closing tagline. Healing is
• 58:53
  Speaker 1: a journey and wholeness is the destination. And here let
• 58:57
  Speaker 1: me give you a bit more context. Wholeness being the
• 59:01
  Speaker 1: destination means just a level of awararen It's a level
• 59:04
  Speaker 1: of consciousness, a level of a curity, keenness to where
• 59:09
  Speaker 1: you can recognize and acknowledge and you cannot do Listen,
• 59:14
  Speaker 1: I'm all this, y'all know. I'm a preest therapy. I'm
• 59:16
  Speaker 1: a therapist. I'm a pre therapy. I'm a preest therapy.
• 59:18
  Speaker 1: But the great Doctor Needle Phillips said, prayer is a weapon.
• 59:24
  Speaker 1: Therapy is a strategy. Do them together because God needs
• 59:31
  Speaker 1: to be involved in your process. Somewhere. I ain't trying
• 59:34
  Speaker 1: to get y'all saved. Don't come after me, you none
• 59:36
  Speaker 1: church folks. Do what you do. But I'm just saying
• 59:39
  Speaker 1: if God ain't a part of I can't do it.
• 59:41
  Speaker 1: Because you got some folks out here that's calling and
• 59:44
  Speaker 1: healing and it's witchery. I'm just calling out there, it
• 59:47
  Speaker 1: ain't healing because you're not finna blow no sage o me.
• 59:50
  Speaker 1: Because because you can't blow sage over molestation. Okay, you
• 59:56
  Speaker 1: can't blow sage over abuse. Sorry, come after meeting, you can't.
• 1:00:03
  Speaker 1: There's some stuff that has traumatized people, that has manifested
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 1: into spirits. This is real. This is why I don't
• 1:00:11
  Speaker 1: play with this. And when trauma has not been processed,
• 1:00:18
  Speaker 1: it can become demonic. And I'm not calling nobody daemon demonic,
• 1:00:22
  Speaker 1: meaning you can be overtaken. And let me tell you something.
• 1:00:26
  Speaker 1: Walk through a mental health hospital and come back and
• 1:00:30
  Speaker 1: talk to me, and you watch people in the room
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 1: spinning around, turn around because they can't find their mind,
• 1:00:37
  Speaker 1: they can't find themselves. So this is serious business. I
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 1: wasn't playing on going here, but we going there. Cjay,
• 1:00:44
  Speaker 1: don't cut this out. Seriously. We're in a world where
• 1:00:49
  Speaker 1: there are a lot of things that are operating in
• 1:00:52
  Speaker 1: the air. So when you get to open it up,
• 1:00:57
  Speaker 1: be sure and be very sure that you're opening up
• 1:01:01
  Speaker 1: to some people who are called to do this work,
• 1:01:05
  Speaker 1: because everybody who's saying there, here the baby probably gonna
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 1: bring on more stuff that you don't have the capacity
• 1:01:11
  Speaker 1: to deal with. Anyway. That's it. I love y'all again.
• 1:01:14
  Speaker 1: I'm doctor J. Just here with doctor J. Click the
• 1:01:17
  Speaker 1: subscribe button and remember healing it's a journey, wholeness is
• 1:01:20
  Speaker 1: a destination, and keep doing the work. Just here with
• 1:01:24
  Speaker 1: Doctor J, a production of the Black Effect Podcast Network.
• 1:01:28
  Speaker 1: For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,
• 1:01:32
  Speaker 1: or wherever you listen to your favorite shows, and you
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 1: can follow me at King J. Barnett on Instagram and
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 1: x and follow us on YouTube. Just Heal, Doctor J.