Latest / Rich Valdés: This is America! / Arab tension, Adult kids, Antennas
Transcript
- 0:05Speaker 1: This is America with Rich Valdez, powered by politweek dot
- 0:10Speaker 1: com and.
- 0:10Speaker 2: Rich Valdes is with us. Former Christian Administration official.
- 0:13Speaker 1: You worked at Chris Christie and Fallistas on a lot
- 0:15Speaker 1: of public service stuff, Rich.
- 0:16Speaker 3: Valdez, Communist now with the Washington Times. This is America, Richiev.
- 0:20Speaker 3: You're on the air with a nation Nation with America
- 0:24Speaker 3: with your host, Rich Valdez. What's up, America.
- 0:28Speaker 4: I am Rich Valdes Valdez with an s at Rich
- 0:30Speaker 4: Valdez on all of the social media.
- 0:32Speaker 3: Happy Friday. We're now into our.
- 0:35Speaker 4: First full week, right back from Happy New Year. Welcome
- 0:39Speaker 4: to the program, seventeen blocks away from Madison Square Garden,
- 0:43Speaker 4: Rich Valdez, it's a pleasure to be with you in
- 0:45Speaker 4: honor and a blessing. Lots of stuff. New footage on
- 0:48Speaker 4: that shooting from the ice officer. Apparently we have an
- 0:52Speaker 4: actual video. He had a phone in his pocket and
- 0:56Speaker 4: it was almost like a bodycam video shows you everything
- 0:59Speaker 4: how they were taunting these guys, how the other officer
- 1:02Speaker 4: pulled up and told her to get out of the car,
- 1:03Speaker 4: and the minute he said to get out of the car,
- 1:05Speaker 4: she did the dip. She tried to do the getaway.
- 1:07Speaker 4: It was really really something to watch. Short video too.
- 1:11Speaker 4: It's on my social media if you want to check
- 1:12Speaker 4: it out at rich Valdes. If you want to join
- 1:14Speaker 4: the program, feel free to give us a call. Eight
- 1:17Speaker 4: seven seven valdest one eight seven seven My last name
- 1:21Speaker 4: VALDESZ with an S and followed by the number one.
- 1:23Speaker 3: Now, I want to get into a few things.
- 1:25Speaker 4: President Trump says he is not going to launch a
- 1:28Speaker 4: second attack on Venezuela because they are cooperating and they
- 1:32Speaker 4: have now released eight hundred prisoners that have been set
- 1:35Speaker 4: free from captivity. These people were being held by the regime.
- 1:41Speaker 4: Some say in torture chambers, others say in different situations.
- 1:46Speaker 4: I saw some videos showing that they were just in
- 1:48Speaker 4: jail because they believed in Jesus. They were pastors, preachers
- 1:51Speaker 4: and trying to spread the gospel, which is again contrary
- 1:55Speaker 4: to what the regime stood for. The Communists don't believe
- 1:57Speaker 4: in God, so you're not allowed to do that. Another
- 2:00Speaker 4: thing that happened today, President Trump, he says no to
- 2:04Speaker 4: a pardon for Diddy. Now I know because I have
- 2:10Speaker 4: a friend that is a consultant to a team Didty
- 2:14Speaker 4: and I was told that they were pushing very hard
- 2:17Speaker 4: to try and.
- 2:18Speaker 3: Get a.
- 2:21Speaker 4: Actual pardon, and it was a long shot and President
- 2:26Speaker 4: Trump shut that down today. So that's the latest on that.
- 2:30Speaker 4: And there's also this story coming out of the United
- 2:34Speaker 4: Arab Emirates. Apparently the UAE is now banning their college
- 2:41Speaker 4: students from studying in the UK. Why for fear of
- 2:47Speaker 4: them becoming radicalized radicalized Islamists. The United Arab Emirates are
- 2:54Speaker 4: afraid that their citizens are going to become radical Islamists
- 2:59Speaker 4: if they go to school in England. Wild never thought
- 3:03Speaker 4: I'd hear that. So they've stopped off funding for anything
- 3:06Speaker 4: related to helping people do that. And this is because
- 3:10Speaker 4: of their concern over the Muslim Brotherhood. And let me
- 3:16Speaker 4: tell you this was really interesting because a lot of
- 3:20Speaker 4: people don't realize how, I guess, intense these things can be.
- 3:27Speaker 4: But very intense, that's all I could say. Listen to
- 3:31Speaker 4: this exchange between Ian Hersey Ali and the gb News channel.
- 3:38Speaker 3: Check this out.
- 3:40Speaker 5: There was a report in France last year which warned
- 3:42Speaker 5: that the problem with organizations like Muslim Brotherhood is they
- 3:47Speaker 5: don't really operate top down through violence, but bottom up
- 3:50Speaker 5: through state infiltration through embedding themselves in schools, councils, police
- 3:55Speaker 5: authorities and so on. And while we have you, I
- 3:58Speaker 5: do want to ask you. We're going to come to
- 3:59Speaker 5: this in a bit more detail later on in the show.
- 4:01Speaker 5: But we have had this case recently in the West
- 4:04Speaker 5: Midlands in Birmingham of a police a police force seemingly
- 4:08Speaker 5: being lobbied or pressured by local islemiss which to me
- 4:13Speaker 5: is classic behavior in the genre of bottom up infiltration.
- 4:18Speaker 5: And is this what the UAE are worried about as well?
- 4:21Speaker 5: Is this evidence of a Muslim brotherhood style infiltration of
- 4:25Speaker 5: British society.
- 4:27Speaker 6: Absolutely, And to be honest with you, when I read publications,
- 4:31Speaker 6: yes there's the French report, but the best, most comprehensive
- 4:35Speaker 6: reports actually written by British people and British institutions. So
- 4:39Speaker 6: British intelligence understands exactly who the Muslim Brotherhood is, that
- 4:44Speaker 6: there are a hydro with many heads that they operate
- 4:46Speaker 6: through front groups. They understand how they use and abuse
- 4:50Speaker 6: the system. So it isn't a lack of knowledge, it's
- 4:54Speaker 6: really a lack of political will. It is your government
- 4:58Speaker 6: making a t of and thinking, you know, they do
- 5:02Speaker 6: mobilize this larger demographic which they radicalize in mosques, in
- 5:08Speaker 6: youth camps, in schools, and yes, in university campuses. We're
- 5:12Speaker 6: seeing a lot of you know the side effects of
- 5:16Speaker 6: that radicalization of young people, seeing it take place in
- 5:22Speaker 6: our streets. You know what happened after October seventh, in
- 5:24Speaker 6: the last two years, and how they come out shouting
- 5:28Speaker 6: and aliging with you know, the Marxist Communist left. But
- 5:33Speaker 6: in any case, we know it. And I think what
- 5:35Speaker 6: the UAE is telling us over and over again is
- 5:39Speaker 6: we don't mind you taking that risk for yourselves in
- 5:42Speaker 6: your own country. It's self destructed. They've wanted us, they know,
- 5:45Speaker 6: they've lived with this. The UA used to funded the
- 5:49Speaker 6: Muslim Brotherhood. They hosted the Muslim brother so did Saudi Arabia,
- 5:52Speaker 6: and over time they found out the Muslim Brotherhood is
- 5:55Speaker 6: like a cancer. Along with these Islamist they wanted to
- 5:58Speaker 6: establish themselves and then overthrow the existing authorities and take
- 6:02Speaker 6: power and control. They've told us all of these things.
- 6:05Speaker 6: They've collaborated with us. I think the UA is a remarkable,
- 6:08Speaker 6: fantastic country, But then here we are, and I think
- 6:11Speaker 6: I don't blame the UAE for, you know, looking after
- 6:14Speaker 6: their own interests and especially looking after the youth.
- 6:18Speaker 4: Again, that's Ian Herciali, herself a former Muslim and a
- 6:23Speaker 4: member of Congress in the Netherlands. She's she's part of
- 6:27Speaker 4: the intelligency and I think she always makes a lot
- 6:29Speaker 4: of sense.
- 6:29Speaker 3: But the UAE cutting funding for.
- 6:32Speaker 4: Citizens to study in the UK over Muslim brotherhood tensions.
- 6:37Speaker 3: That's the headline in the Financial Times.
- 6:39Speaker 4: And again I never thought i'd see this, but it
- 6:43Speaker 4: just corroborates so many of the videos that we've seen
- 6:46Speaker 4: where you have Muslims saying we don't want the Muslim brotherhood.
- 6:50Speaker 4: It explains why there are these seven border walls between
- 6:56Speaker 4: the Gaza strip in Egypt. I've never understood that, right,
- 7:00Speaker 4: I always, even with Jordan, I never understood why why
- 7:04Speaker 4: are they separating themselves from quote unquote Palestine? And now
- 7:08Speaker 4: I understand because the threat of radical Islamism in the
- 7:13Speaker 4: name of Hamas or in the name of the Muslim brotherhood,
- 7:19Speaker 4: these things have ruined civil society in Egypt and in Jordan,
- 7:25Speaker 4: and they're not interested. And I'm not saying this to
- 7:29Speaker 4: disparage Muslims. I'm saying this to disparage Islamists. Right, These
- 7:34Speaker 4: radical terrorist people that use their religion as a ruse
- 7:41Speaker 4: to go ahead and assume the political powers. So that
- 7:44Speaker 4: was a couple of minutes that I wanted you to
- 7:45Speaker 4: hear from that conversation because I thought it was really
- 7:48Speaker 4: just eye opening and really interesting, especially in light of
- 7:51Speaker 4: all of the what's the word I want to look
- 7:54Speaker 4: for all of the fraud that we've seen coming out
- 7:56Speaker 4: of Minnesota and whatnot with Tim Walls resigning and everything.
- 8:01Speaker 4: So I want to switch gears a little bit because
- 8:03Speaker 4: we're gonna bring in Jill Robin Payne in a little bit.
- 8:07Speaker 4: But a couple of other things I wanted to mention
- 8:09Speaker 4: we're gonna get into a bunch of things tonight. We've
- 8:11Speaker 4: talked about a lot of hard political topics. If you're
- 8:14Speaker 4: still in the car and you're not eating dinner yet,
- 8:16Speaker 4: welcome to the party. I'm gonna try and keep it
- 8:18Speaker 4: light and let my hair down. And I don't even
- 8:20Speaker 4: have any hair, So how about that. We're gonna take
- 8:22Speaker 4: it easy. We're gonna do some old school talk.
- 8:24Speaker 3: Radio here, right. I don't wanna. I don't want to
- 8:26Speaker 3: get you angry.
- 8:27Speaker 4: I'm not sending you into the weekend thinking about your taxes,
- 8:30Speaker 4: your Obamacare going up, your this or that, anything like that.
- 8:34Speaker 4: I want you calm, cool and collected, kind of like
- 8:38Speaker 4: mom Nannie was when he took his oath of office
- 8:41Speaker 4: uh in New York City's first Muslim mayor, taking the
- 8:44Speaker 4: oath of office UH, saying that he is going to
- 8:47Speaker 4: govern as a Democrat socialist. He was elected as a
- 8:51Speaker 4: Democrat socialist and he's not letting up on that. And
- 8:55Speaker 4: you know what, I get it. I understand.
- 8:58Speaker 5: UH.
- 8:59Speaker 3: This is what people do.
- 9:00Speaker 4: I've always understood and always known that we have differences
- 9:04Speaker 4: of opinion in our society. Right there are people that
- 9:07Speaker 4: like the New York Mets, and there are people that
- 9:09Speaker 4: like the New York Yankees.
- 9:11Speaker 3: That's a thing.
- 9:11Speaker 4: Not everybody's like Philly, where you got Eagles and Phillies.
- 9:14Speaker 4: It's more diverse sometimes in other places. Some people like chicken,
- 9:18Speaker 4: some people like steak. And I've never said, you know,
- 9:20Speaker 4: I don't like you, although somebody told me yesterday, just yesterday,
- 9:23Speaker 4: they wished me a happy New Year, offered me a
- 9:26Speaker 4: pork chop.
- 9:26Speaker 3: And said good because I don't trust people that don't
- 9:28Speaker 3: eat pork. Okay, whatever.
- 9:32Speaker 4: But for the most part, I think we get along
- 9:33Speaker 4: with people who eat differently than we do.
- 9:35Speaker 3: I understand how life works.
- 9:37Speaker 4: Right. I'm not here to beat you up. I am
- 9:39Speaker 4: here to have those conversations that.
- 9:40Speaker 3: Need to be had.
- 9:41Speaker 4: And I say that to say, I feel like our
- 9:43Speaker 4: society has moved in a direction that we haven't always
- 9:47Speaker 4: been in.
- 9:47Speaker 7: Right.
- 9:47Speaker 4: We weren't always at each other's throats. We used to
- 9:50Speaker 4: take a more positive approach. I'm gonna say a more
- 9:53Speaker 4: Christian approach, right, a more love your neighbor approach, because
- 9:57Speaker 4: it seems that we've given up on a lot of civility.
- 10:00Speaker 4: And I say we because I think all of us
- 10:03Speaker 4: play a role, myself included right, doing conservative talk radio.
- 10:06Speaker 4: And it's okay to be passionate about the things you
- 10:09Speaker 4: believe in while still respecting other people.
- 10:12Speaker 3: Is my thought.
- 10:13Speaker 4: And that's why I like to talk on the phone
- 10:14Speaker 4: with the callers and those that dissent. If you have
- 10:16Speaker 4: a disagreement with me, move to the front of the line.
- 10:19Speaker 4: But I want to get into a number of things, because,
- 10:21Speaker 4: like I said, they can steal your car with antenna's.
- 10:23Speaker 3: We're going to talk about that in a little bit.
- 10:25Speaker 4: They can also there was this other thing I had here, Oh,
- 10:29Speaker 4: the topic of civility, right, It's one that I want
- 10:31Speaker 4: to stay on for a little bit because I think
- 10:34Speaker 4: most people want civility. Then there are people that become
- 10:37Speaker 4: fed up with getting downtrodden, right, with being taken advantage of,
- 10:41Speaker 4: with always doing the right thing, being raised to do
- 10:44Speaker 4: the right thing, and then having the people that disagree
- 10:47Speaker 4: with you not do the right thing and seemingly be
- 10:49Speaker 4: rewarded for it, or if nothing else, not held accountable
- 10:55Speaker 4: for it, not paying the price for their sin, if
- 10:58Speaker 4: you will. And that's what we see with the Somalian
- 11:02Speaker 4: community in Minnesota. Of course, there's fraud all over the place.
- 11:05Speaker 4: Fraud is as rampant as it's ever been since the
- 11:09Speaker 4: beginning of time. But when you have it happening in
- 11:12Speaker 4: a community that clearly is antagonistic towards our way of
- 11:18Speaker 4: life in America, say hey, we never had a problem
- 11:21Speaker 4: with you until now that we know there's fraud, and
- 11:23Speaker 4: they turn around and say, this is because I'm a Muslim. No,
- 11:26Speaker 4: it's not because you're a Muslim. It's because you're stealing
- 11:29Speaker 4: money that you didn't work for. That's really where the
- 11:32Speaker 4: problem is. And I think this is where people are
- 11:35Speaker 4: getting very very upset and this is why I like
- 11:38Speaker 4: to look at things from I guess, the most humorous
- 11:41Speaker 4: point of view that I can. Right, you got to
- 11:42Speaker 4: take everything with a grain of salt as best you can.
- 11:45Speaker 4: And I was scrolling through Instagram and I saw Cory Kahaney.
- 11:48Speaker 4: She's a comedian and had a very very interesting thing
- 11:52Speaker 4: to say, go right ahead. This pract like this really
- 11:55Speaker 4: nice aunt who promises to take you to.
- 11:58Speaker 7: Disney World, but then something always comes up and she
- 12:02Speaker 7: never comes to it.
- 12:06Speaker 4: And a Republican is like this really grumpy uncle who
- 12:10Speaker 4: tells you that he can't afford Disney World, but then
- 12:13Speaker 4: you find out that he went without. So I think
- 12:20Speaker 4: that's funny. I like to appreciate the humor of life.
- 12:24Speaker 4: So keeping it on that lighter note, I want to
- 12:26Speaker 4: talk about things that get us upset while doing it
- 12:29Speaker 4: in the best humor, right, in the best demeanor we could.
- 12:32Speaker 4: We're going to talk about the strange children. Apparently it's
- 12:35Speaker 4: a growing trend where people with adult kids get angry
- 12:39Speaker 4: with their parents, read a book or two, or go
- 12:42Speaker 4: on TikTok, and they find out that they've been the
- 12:44Speaker 4: victim of what's the worthy is trauma. You've traumatized me
- 12:48Speaker 4: and because they've been traumatized, Well, now it's okay for
- 12:51Speaker 4: me to cut off the people that.
- 12:53Speaker 3: Are usually labeled narcissists.
- 12:56Speaker 7: Right.
- 12:56Speaker 4: I think that's what they do right now, and it
- 12:58Speaker 4: doesn't always have to be. I first learned about this
- 13:01Speaker 4: with a girlfriend I had. She was upset with me,
- 13:03Speaker 4: and you're a narcissist. And I said, oh my gosh,
- 13:06Speaker 4: I'd never heard of such a thing. But since I
- 13:09Speaker 4: have this wealth of brilliant people at my disposal as
- 13:13Speaker 4: a talk radio host, guess what. I just happened to
- 13:17Speaker 4: be interviewing a woman, doctor Tracy Kempbell, who wrote the
- 13:20Speaker 4: book on narcissism, and I took the liberty of asking
- 13:23Speaker 4: her if I was a narcissist. And I told her
- 13:25Speaker 4: everything I had to tell her, and she said, no,
- 13:27Speaker 4: you're not a narcissist. She said, you know, we can
- 13:29Speaker 4: have narcissistic tendencies. And she said, people like you need
- 13:32Speaker 4: them more than others. And I said, people like me,
- 13:34Speaker 4: What does that mean? And she said, well, people that
- 13:36Speaker 4: work in the public eye, people that you know are
- 13:38Speaker 4: on radio or television, or even athletes. She said, you
- 13:41Speaker 4: can't go and do your job and not feel like
- 13:44Speaker 4: you're great at it. You've got to feel like you're
- 13:46Speaker 4: doing an amazing job because you need to deliver. And
- 13:48Speaker 4: I said, well, thank god, I thought I was just
- 13:50Speaker 4: self assured. You know, this girl had me thinking I
- 13:53Speaker 4: was a narcissist. Now full disclosure. She was just upset
- 13:57Speaker 4: because I was being a jerk in some instances, and
- 13:59Speaker 4: I was not a.
- 14:01Speaker 3: Outright narcissist.
- 14:04Speaker 4: But the bottom line was, I realized that there were
- 14:07Speaker 4: things that I was saying and doing that caused her
- 14:10Speaker 4: to believe.
- 14:11Speaker 3: That I was a narcissist.
- 14:14Speaker 4: And I think there was some you know, inaccurate use
- 14:17Speaker 4: of this term, which I think is very popular today.
- 14:20Speaker 4: Everybody is somehow an narcissist, and any kid lately now
- 14:24Speaker 4: that has been held accountable by their parents is now
- 14:28Speaker 4: a victim of trauma. And because you've caused me trauma,
- 14:32Speaker 4: I don't want to talk to you, right, And that's
- 14:34Speaker 4: what a lot of kids are doing.
- 14:36Speaker 3: And I'm a gen xer.
- 14:37Speaker 4: I'm forty seven years old, so I'm on the younger
- 14:41Speaker 4: side of life, I think still so my kids are
- 14:45Speaker 4: in their twenties, both of them once twenty one's twenty four,
- 14:48Speaker 4: and they both still talk to me but I've had
- 14:50Speaker 4: my bouts of you know, my kid's not talking to me,
- 14:52Speaker 4: that's for sure. I have two daughters, but by and large,
- 14:54Speaker 4: we get along well despite the occasional friction. But there
- 14:58Speaker 4: are people out there that have experienced some serious disconnects
- 15:03Speaker 4: with their children. And I think to myself, I think
- 15:05Speaker 4: I would buckle and start crying if I thought my
- 15:08Speaker 4: kids would never talk to me again.
- 15:10Speaker 3: Right.
- 15:11Speaker 4: I've heard some parents talk about three years going by
- 15:14Speaker 4: two and a half years. I heard one mom say
- 15:16Speaker 4: it was eight years where they hadn't talked to their kid,
- 15:19Speaker 4: And I'm thinking, how do you not talk to your
- 15:20Speaker 4: kid in that long? My kids, when they do get
- 15:23Speaker 4: mad at me, it's because I'm calling them more than
- 15:25Speaker 4: once in a day, going hey, everything right, you got gas?
- 15:27Speaker 3: Everything good?
- 15:28Speaker 4: That's me right, I guess the quote unquote helicopter parent. Anyway,
- 15:32Speaker 4: So I'm going to dig into that. We're scheduled to
- 15:35Speaker 4: have psychosocial therapists join us in a little bit to
- 15:38Speaker 4: talk about that.
- 15:39Speaker 3: A little bit.
- 15:39Speaker 4: Before I get into that, I want to circle back
- 15:41Speaker 4: because this perceived trauma, right, It's something that's affecting a
- 15:46Speaker 4: lot of people. Some people feel traumatized by what's happening
- 15:48Speaker 4: with the Democrat Party in America, by the outright fraud
- 15:52Speaker 4: that we're seeing all over the place. Right Minnesota, in
- 15:55Speaker 4: my opinion, is the tip of the iceberg, the tip
- 15:57Speaker 4: of the spear. We're just learning now how fraud looks.
- 16:01Speaker 4: That you can take money out of a daycare center
- 16:04Speaker 4: that's paid for by the government for a poor community
- 16:06Speaker 4: where parents can't afford to have daycare. So the government
- 16:10Speaker 4: starts to pay for this daycare. The government, I EU
- 16:14Speaker 4: and me the tax dollar, the taxpayer, and our dollars,
- 16:17Speaker 4: hard earned dollars, go to pay these programs to the
- 16:20Speaker 4: tune of millions. Where they go and they rent a
- 16:22Speaker 4: facility with a fake facade on it that says leering center, ABC,
- 16:28Speaker 4: Childcare whatever and whatnot. And there's nobody there, and some
- 16:32Speaker 4: you know, nineteen or twenty five year old young man
- 16:36Speaker 4: is the manager of somebody who doesn't look like they
- 16:38Speaker 4: have much experience running daycare facilities. And then they will
- 16:41Speaker 4: go ahead and you say that they are the principal there,
- 16:45Speaker 4: that they are the school director or whatever, and what
- 16:47Speaker 4: have you. So this Nick Shirley that I've been talking
- 16:50Speaker 4: about all night, and you've probably heard and seen on.
- 16:52Speaker 3: The social media.
- 16:53Speaker 4: He took them to task and visited I forget how
- 16:56Speaker 4: many locations, but plenty many of them, and nobody was
- 17:01Speaker 4: there to answer his call, and nobody wanted to show
- 17:04Speaker 4: them the inside of the facility. Now I get it.
- 17:06Speaker 4: Somebody came to my facility and said, hey, do you
- 17:09Speaker 4: guys hate to have kids here?
- 17:10Speaker 3: Can I see?
- 17:11Speaker 4: I've probably punched them in the face and be like,
- 17:13Speaker 4: if you want to see little kids, what are you sick?
- 17:14Speaker 3: Oh, get out of here.
- 17:15Speaker 4: Bro, And I would chase them off, but I understand
- 17:20Speaker 4: the need and the willingness to do that. You know,
- 17:23Speaker 4: if you want to see the kids, you're going to
- 17:24Speaker 4: see them when they leave with their parents, and you
- 17:25Speaker 4: better keep your distance or I'm calling the cops. But
- 17:27Speaker 4: apparently no kids were ever leaving and no parents ever
- 17:30Speaker 4: came because there was nobody there to begin with. Everybody
- 17:34Speaker 4: seems to be in on the scam. This is the
- 17:38Speaker 4: problem that's got people in it's izzy, right. So you've
- 17:44Speaker 4: got this Nick Shirley. Now he's getting beaten up all
- 17:48Speaker 4: over the media.
- 17:49Speaker 3: There.
- 17:49Speaker 4: They're pushing back. They're calling him an islama phobe. They
- 17:52Speaker 4: are saying, you're doing this because you hate everybody because
- 17:56Speaker 4: you're just the worst that there is.
- 17:58Speaker 3: Tell the truth.
- 17:58Speaker 4: You're doing this because we're Muslims, and he's saying, no,
- 18:01Speaker 4: it's not about that at all. Matter of fact, he
- 18:03Speaker 4: was on a podcast recently and he was discussing how
- 18:07Speaker 4: he really he's got nothing. He's got no dirt in
- 18:11Speaker 4: his closet where you can come and get him, and
- 18:12Speaker 4: I'll play that for you in a moment. But there's
- 18:15Speaker 4: something more pressing, which is now that these daycare centers
- 18:20Speaker 4: are under scrutiny. All of a sudden, out of nowhere,
- 18:25Speaker 4: one of the daycare directors comes out and says, all right,
- 18:28Speaker 4: we're gonna have a press conference, and I'm here to
- 18:31Speaker 4: let you know that we no longer have the student's
- 18:34Speaker 4: enrollment records, we no longer have our payroll and employee
- 18:39Speaker 4: records that everybody wants to know about, because we were
- 18:43Speaker 4: robbed last night, thank you very much. And we were
- 18:46Speaker 4: robbed because of that guy, Nick Shirley, because he went
- 18:49Speaker 4: out there saying that we are defrauding everyone and that
- 18:52Speaker 4: if you just look at our books you would know
- 18:53Speaker 4: that we're lying. Well, guess what, I'm here to tell
- 18:56Speaker 4: you that they stole our books.
- 18:57Speaker 3: Listen to this.
- 18:59Speaker 8: These people are like I saw something. Someone's calling me
- 19:02Speaker 8: like a PDF. They're seeing all these crazy allegations. I'm like, hey,
- 19:06Speaker 8: what sex for them is? They're never going to be
- 19:08Speaker 8: able to get me. I don't drink alcohol, I don't
- 19:10Speaker 8: do drugs. I'm a virgin. I don't have sex with
- 19:12Speaker 8: random girls. You're not gonna catch me on no sexual allegation, chargers.
- 19:16Speaker 8: I don't have any addictions. I don't have many vices.
- 19:19Speaker 8: So where are these people going to get me before?
- 19:21Speaker 3: Oh, they're done? Religious?
- 19:23Speaker 8: I'm religious.
- 19:24Speaker 3: I believe in God. I'm everything they hate. So what
- 19:27Speaker 3: are they gonna get me for it? They can't get
- 19:29Speaker 3: me for anything, like.
- 19:31Speaker 4: They're gonna make sure for my personal posit Right there,
- 19:33Speaker 4: That is Nick Shirley. He's on with an Iranian immigrant,
- 19:37Speaker 4: Patrick Beck David on his podcast, The PPD Podcast, and
- 19:40Speaker 4: he's telling him that you can't get me on anything
- 19:43Speaker 4: because I've got no dirt, So.
- 19:44Speaker 3: Bring it right, bring it.
- 19:46Speaker 4: But apparently they're in damage control, and like I said,
- 19:49Speaker 4: they're saying that they've lost their papers conveniently, that they
- 19:53Speaker 4: were robbed.
- 19:54Speaker 3: Conveniently.
- 19:55Speaker 4: This manager at the Nacomas daycare center in Minneapolis says
- 19:58Speaker 4: they got broken into.
- 20:00Speaker 3: I think we have that clip lined up. Do we
- 20:04Speaker 3: go right ahead?
- 20:05Speaker 9: Yesterday morning I was called by the owner because unfortunately,
- 20:11Speaker 9: someone came in to our daycare. We looked and saw
- 20:15Speaker 9: what happened, and we saw that the suspect came in
- 20:18Speaker 9: from the back, broke in from the back kitchen, and
- 20:23Speaker 9: he also destroyed the wall to come in. As we
- 20:27Speaker 9: walked around the daycare, we saw that our office doors
- 20:31Speaker 9: was broken into us all.
- 20:33Speaker 8: We saw that.
- 20:35Speaker 9: Unfortunately, we saw that there was important documentation enrollment of
- 20:40Speaker 9: the children and also employee documentation that was gone.
- 20:44Speaker 4: Held on a second unfortunately for who for me? Because
- 20:48Speaker 4: I want to know if you guys are defrauding the public. Clearly,
- 20:51Speaker 4: this is not unfortunate for you because it seems like
- 20:54Speaker 4: a cover up in the making.
- 20:55Speaker 3: Go ahead.
- 20:56Speaker 9: There were also check books or ripped from our check
- 21:02Speaker 9: papers that were from our book. This is devastating news
- 21:07Speaker 9: and we don't know why this is targeting our so
- 21:09Speaker 9: all the community. As one video made by a specific
- 21:14Speaker 9: individual made this all happen. We've been receiving hateful messages
- 21:21Speaker 9: through our voice notes threatening us. In the past couple
- 21:24Speaker 9: of days, including one that happened yesterday morning, when the
- 21:29Speaker 9: breaking after the breaking. This is frightening and exhausting because
- 21:34Speaker 9: this is happening to us some all the communities, as
- 21:38Speaker 9: some all the Americans. We are supposed to stand with
- 21:41Speaker 9: each other and help each other.
- 21:43Speaker 3: All right, he's standing, he's helping. Guess what.
- 21:46Speaker 4: Listen, people are going to be upset when they find
- 21:49Speaker 4: out that they've been ripped off. And the hubris here
- 21:53Speaker 4: is just palpable. I want to go to the phones.
- 21:55Speaker 4: Who do we have in the phone bank? Sir?
- 21:57Speaker 2: We have Sue in Schwanksville.
- 22:00Speaker 4: Oh my goodness, it's my good friend, Sue in Schwegsville, Pennsylvania.
- 22:05Speaker 3: Sue, go for it. You're on with Richveld.
- 22:07Speaker 7: Well, it's great to hear your boys on the radio again.
- 22:09Speaker 3: Buddy, Hey, hey, hey, how are you.
- 22:12Speaker 7: I'm I'm surviving. It's cold out here.
- 22:15Speaker 3: Happy New Year to you, Sue.
- 22:17Speaker 7: Happy New Year to you too. Anyway, the story I
- 22:21Speaker 7: have for you, it isn't a parent and child situation,
- 22:26Speaker 7: but it's my sister and myself. Okay, so we grew
- 22:30Speaker 7: up to your part. We were so tight we could
- 22:32Speaker 7: read each other's minds. You know. That's how yeah, and uh,
- 22:37Speaker 7: when Trump was elected the first time, she suddenly got
- 22:41Speaker 7: really cool with me and all that. I could tell
- 22:43Speaker 7: she didn't like my politics, because I'm very vocal about it,
- 22:46Speaker 7: as you know. Yeah, and so you know, every now
- 22:50Speaker 7: and then I would text her just to reach out,
- 22:52Speaker 7: try to keep that line of communication open and test
- 22:55Speaker 7: the waters and see if she was talking to me again.
- 22:57Speaker 7: But you know, it's for the first four years of
- 23:01Speaker 7: Trump's administration and for all of Biden. No, she wasn't
- 23:04Speaker 7: warming up at all. And then when Trump got elected
- 23:07Speaker 7: the second time, she unfriended me on Facebook. Now she
- 23:11Speaker 7: lives in DC. She doesn't live anywhere near me.
- 23:13Speaker 3: That's part of the problem.
- 23:15Speaker 7: Yeah, so she unfriended me on Facebook, and it's like
- 23:19Speaker 7: she's a complete stranger to me.
- 23:21Speaker 3: Now, how long have you not talked to her?
- 23:25Speaker 7: Well, I've texted her here and there, but no, it's
- 23:28Speaker 7: in years.
- 23:29Speaker 3: She isn't right back.
- 23:32Speaker 7: She'll give me one word answers back or something like that.
- 23:35Speaker 7: You know.
- 23:36Speaker 4: So this is not like a family beef. This is
- 23:40Speaker 4: really she went hard left you. In her opinion, you're
- 23:44Speaker 4: a hard right fascist.
- 23:47Speaker 3: And that's where this stems from exactly.
- 23:51Speaker 7: In fact, one of my one of my other cousins
- 23:54Speaker 7: saw something she posted about she was so upset that
- 23:57Speaker 7: Trump was elected she had to do something. So something
- 24:02Speaker 7: that she had to do was you know, to sun
- 24:05Speaker 7: her own closest family members, which I just don't get it.
- 24:09Speaker 7: I wasn't like that when Obama was in there. I
- 24:11Speaker 7: feel like she's entitled to her opinion, you know what
- 24:14Speaker 7: I mean. I'm like, yeah, I don't get it.
- 24:17Speaker 4: Well, you know, so here's what I've learned over the years.
- 24:20Speaker 4: It's about the first point you made here, not the
- 24:23Speaker 4: family part in life. There really are people that just
- 24:27Speaker 4: believe things that we don't believe.
- 24:29Speaker 3: Right.
- 24:29Speaker 4: So I can't imagine myself ever really being in a
- 24:32Speaker 4: situation where I think communism is great. And listen, my
- 24:36Speaker 4: parents were once ill. My mom was oxygen dependent and
- 24:40Speaker 4: there were different programs that she needed to make use of.
- 24:44Speaker 4: But I look at that and I say, that is
- 24:47Speaker 4: what those programs are for, right, People who literally can't
- 24:51Speaker 4: do for themselves. But if you can do for yourself,
- 24:54Speaker 4: you should want to do for yourself, right. I think
- 24:56Speaker 4: we have to have this type of pragmatic look at things.
- 24:59Speaker 4: But there are people who think, you know, why would
- 25:01Speaker 4: I work. And I've seen these videos people coming into
- 25:04Speaker 4: this country, like from Venezuela saying why would I work
- 25:07Speaker 4: if we got idiot Americans that are willing to pay
- 25:10Speaker 4: taxes and they keep paying them when the idiot Americans
- 25:13Speaker 4: are willing to give me money to stay home.
- 25:15Speaker 7: Yeah. Are all these people that are crying about their
- 25:17Speaker 7: snap been it's just going away goud Right. They all
- 25:21Speaker 7: have blue hair, they all have an eyepoll, they have
- 25:23Speaker 7: long tanger nails. They pay for all that stuff and
- 25:26Speaker 7: their whinian crying about how oh the texts are supposed
- 25:29Speaker 7: to take care of my kids? What am I going
- 25:30Speaker 7: to do now? Well, you're going to go to work
- 25:33Speaker 7: or you're going to stop buying all that other stuff
- 25:34Speaker 7: that you're wasting money on, you know.
- 25:37Speaker 4: And that is such an interesting thing because you know,
- 25:40Speaker 4: that's like a real world example of exactly what I'm
- 25:42Speaker 4: talking about, this disconnect from reality in my opinion. Right,
- 25:46Speaker 4: But I realized there's a lot of people. One of
- 25:48Speaker 4: them is very educated, the son of a professor. He's
- 25:50Speaker 4: now the mayor of New York City, Zara Mamdani. He
- 25:53Speaker 4: truly believes in collectivism. He thinks that this is the
- 25:56Speaker 4: way forward. He's a nipple baby himself. He now has
- 26:00Speaker 4: a government job. He's never really had a job before.
- 26:02Speaker 4: In the job he had before this was also a
- 26:04Speaker 4: government job as an assemblyman. So he's never made a business,
- 26:09Speaker 4: although his mom, I think, has a business and she's
- 26:11Speaker 4: very successful and made a lot of money. But fascinating
- 26:14Speaker 4: to me how you can come from a background like
- 26:16Speaker 4: that and where you you know, your mom.
- 26:18Speaker 3: Made millions making films, very entrepreneurial.
- 26:22Speaker 4: There's no government there, and yet you're still here talking
- 26:25Speaker 4: about we need you know, we need to govern as
- 26:28Speaker 4: democrats socialists.
- 26:31Speaker 7: And he was living in a rent control department too.
- 26:34Speaker 4: Right, right, he's practicing what he preaches. He loves it.
- 26:38Speaker 4: Oh my goodness, I can't believe it. Well, you know,
- 26:41Speaker 4: I'm gonna bring up your your situation to Jill Robin Pain,
- 26:45Speaker 4: who's joining me in the next at the bottom of
- 26:47Speaker 4: the hour, because I think too often we see this,
- 26:50Speaker 4: and I never saw it as much as I did
- 26:53Speaker 4: over the holidays, where you know, it was like I
- 26:58Speaker 4: guess I had clicked on one video from a woman
- 27:01Speaker 4: named Tanya Khazal I think is her name, and she
- 27:05Speaker 4: is a person that did that to her mom. She
- 27:07Speaker 4: cut her mom off for eight years, and then one
- 27:10Speaker 4: day realized, I'm doing the devil's work. This is not godly.
- 27:14Speaker 4: I should not have ever done this. And now she
- 27:17Speaker 4: dedicates herself to counseling others on how to reconcile and
- 27:21Speaker 4: how your mom or dad is not the enemy and
- 27:24Speaker 4: the root cause of every problem you have, even if
- 27:27Speaker 4: modern psychology is telling you that. And I found that
- 27:30Speaker 4: to be fascinating. So I started following her, and then
- 27:32Speaker 4: next thing you know, I got all these different videos,
- 27:34Speaker 4: and one of them came my way from Oprah Winfrey,
- 27:36Speaker 4: and I.
- 27:37Speaker 3: Watched the entire episode of Oprah.
- 27:39Speaker 4: It might be the only time in my life I've
- 27:41Speaker 4: ever watched a one hour Oprah Winfrey episode, but I did,
- 27:45Speaker 4: and let me tell you, it was fascinating. She really
- 27:47Speaker 4: did have a very diverse panel on there. She had
- 27:50Speaker 4: a guy who, by my estimation, he might be a liberal,
- 27:54Speaker 4: but in that setting, he was the most conservative there.
- 27:57Speaker 4: He stood for family, he stood for making a reconciliation
- 28:02Speaker 4: with your children. He had a daughter that cut him
- 28:04Speaker 4: off and bought into this way of thinking. Then she
- 28:09Speaker 4: had the author of one of these books that tells
- 28:11Speaker 4: you it's okay to walk away from your family. And
- 28:13Speaker 4: then she had somebody that's even further to the left
- 28:16Speaker 4: than that psychologist, another one who's saying, look, if your
- 28:19Speaker 4: parents cause you problems and they're causing you a traumatic reaction,
- 28:23Speaker 4: you need to cut them off. And I thought to myself,
- 28:26Speaker 4: this is not good. And the three of them had
- 28:28Speaker 4: a very collegial conversation, and each of them made some
- 28:32Speaker 4: interesting points. I was mainly with the guy that I'm
- 28:34Speaker 4: labeling as the conservative, because he made the most sense
- 28:37Speaker 4: where at the end of the day, you're together with
- 28:39Speaker 4: your children. And most of the audience thankfully agreed, but
- 28:43Speaker 4: there were a couple of young people in the audience, soo,
- 28:45Speaker 4: oh my gosh. One woman, she was proud. She's like, yep,
- 28:49Speaker 4: it's been almost four years. I haven't talked to my mother,
- 28:51Speaker 4: not even a text. And she was proud of this.
- 28:55Speaker 4: And it graduated because obviously it sparks other problems where
- 28:58Speaker 4: your siblings will call, you may get an answer and uncle.
- 29:01Speaker 3: Hey you got to call your mom. What are you thinking?
- 29:02Speaker 3: What are you doing?
- 29:03Speaker 4: And then they get cut off, and as years go by,
- 29:06Speaker 4: you cut off more and more family. And she literally
- 29:09Speaker 4: with a straight face and a smile, said she was
- 29:11Speaker 4: probably like twenty five years old.
- 29:13Speaker 3: She said, well, they said.
- 29:15Speaker 4: How do you manage that without being with your family?
- 29:17Speaker 4: She said, well, I've made a new family. I have friends,
- 29:19Speaker 4: I have coworkers, I have pets now. And I thought,
- 29:22Speaker 4: and she was so proud of that, and I was
- 29:24Speaker 4: literally like, you're laughing now. I was laughing and shaking
- 29:27Speaker 4: my head in sadness for her, because I thought, who
- 29:29Speaker 4: would want to replace their family with a bunch of strangers.
- 29:32Speaker 4: I mean, jokingly, many many of us make I'll take
- 29:35Speaker 4: the strangers and the dog. But at the end of
- 29:38Speaker 4: the day, you know, if you're in a jam and
- 29:39Speaker 4: you got to bury a body, you know who you
- 29:41Speaker 4: got a call and it's not.
- 29:42Speaker 3: Strangers and the new dog. That's sure unbelievable.
- 29:45Speaker 4: Well, Sue, I appreciate the call. I'm hopeful to chat
- 29:49Speaker 4: with you again more. We do calls on the new
- 29:52Speaker 4: show as well, and I'm looking forward to it, and
- 29:55Speaker 4: we'll be doing the video stream real soon, So keep
- 29:57Speaker 4: an eye on on my social media for that announcement.
- 29:59Speaker 3: It's coming up soon.
- 30:00Speaker 7: Because it's been great hearing your voice again. I sure
- 30:02Speaker 7: miss you.
- 30:03Speaker 4: Oh thank you, I miss you too. I really miss
- 30:05Speaker 4: I miss Gil from Manila. I can't wait to talk
- 30:08Speaker 4: to him again too, and I'm looking forward to this
- 30:10Speaker 4: new venture with video. It's you know, I've become accustomed
- 30:13Speaker 4: to being a radio guy, so I can do a
- 30:15Speaker 4: show in my underwear and you never know.
- 30:16Speaker 3: Right and uh, you can't do that on video. You
- 30:19Speaker 3: get in trouble like that guy from CNN and.
- 30:21Speaker 7: With that pork pie. Happy that you have exactly.
- 30:26Speaker 3: Thank you so much to Happy new Year to you.
- 30:28Speaker 4: Thanks for the call, and he goes, we are coming back.
- 30:32Speaker 4: It's Rich Valdez and straight ahead, we're gonna check in
- 30:35Speaker 4: with Jill Robin Pain.
- 30:37Speaker 3: This is a.
- 30:40Speaker 7: This is a.
- 30:49Speaker 3: President Donald J. Trump, mister President, welcome to the program service.
- 30:53Speaker 7: Well, thank you, Rich, and thank you for everything.
- 30:55Speaker 1: I know you very well and I have I listened,
- 30:57Speaker 1: but I have a lot of people that listen and
- 31:00Speaker 1: they love your show and I appreciate it very much.
- 31:03Speaker 4: All right, I mean, he goes, welcome back. It's Rich
- 31:05Speaker 4: Valdes and the best head of hair and talk radio.
- 31:07Speaker 4: That's me Rich Valdez VALDESZ with an s at Rich
- 31:10Speaker 4: valdest on all of the social media. I am the
- 31:12Speaker 4: host of this is America with Rich Valdes. Make sure
- 31:15Speaker 4: you subscribe to that. I'd love it if you could.
- 31:17Speaker 4: Plus YouTube, Rumble, all those things. Subscribe to those two.
- 31:20Speaker 4: If you're enjoying what you're hearing, I'd love to continue
- 31:24Speaker 4: the conversation on video. We're doing a big announcement on
- 31:27Speaker 4: video in a couple of weeks, and I'd love for
- 31:29Speaker 4: you to be a part of it.
- 31:30Speaker 3: Anyway, I was scrolling.
- 31:32Speaker 4: A big part of my day involves scrolling, typically for
- 31:34Speaker 4: news to find out what's going on in the world. However,
- 31:38Speaker 4: every now and again you run into different things, things
- 31:40Speaker 4: that are kind of went off, things that affect our
- 31:42Speaker 4: real life, just like Sue and Schwanksville, Pennsylvania just talked
- 31:45Speaker 4: about when she was explaining about her falling out with
- 31:50Speaker 4: her sister over El Trompetos and all this. Magnus the
- 31:52Speaker 4: forty fifth president of these United States at presidenty and
- 31:57Speaker 4: he's also the forty seventh by the way, and wow,
- 32:01Speaker 4: you know, it's just remarkable that you see so much
- 32:04Speaker 4: family estrangement, the estrangement of adult children, especially during the holidays.
- 32:08Speaker 4: That's difficult. And I heard a clip from doctor Daniel Aman.
- 32:13Speaker 4: He's a psychiatrist typically talking about ADHD and other brain issues,
- 32:19Speaker 4: but I thought it was interesting listen to.
- 32:22Speaker 1: This garrantee In two words from a child psychiatrist, firm
- 32:29Speaker 1: and kind. If you just always think about those two words,
- 32:35Speaker 1: you're going to be a good parent. Kids named boundaries
- 32:39Speaker 1: and they need you to enforce them, but not with anger,
- 32:43Speaker 1: not with madness, not with belittle men, with kindness. And
- 32:48Speaker 1: if you just think of the best coach you ever had,
- 32:53Speaker 1: they noticed what you did right, and they taught you
- 32:57Speaker 1: when you needed to do better, notice what you did
- 33:00Speaker 1: right and they taught you. And then think of the
- 33:03Speaker 1: worst coaches you ever had, and they noticed what you
- 33:09Speaker 1: did wrong and belittled you.
- 33:12Speaker 4: Now that advice from doctor Daniel Aman is great, right,
- 33:17Speaker 4: sound advice be be fair but kind right, accountability with kindness,
- 33:23Speaker 4: And that sounds great. However, my parents didn't get that either, right.
- 33:27Speaker 4: I didn't have that kind of upbringing. It was actually
- 33:29Speaker 4: the opposite. It was if you did something wrong, you
- 33:32Speaker 4: were belittled, and I never held them accountable.
- 33:35Speaker 7: Right.
- 33:35Speaker 3: I never said I'm leaving. I mean when it was
- 33:37Speaker 3: time to leave, I left.
- 33:38Speaker 4: But maybe that's the issue, right, Maybe that's why kids
- 33:41Speaker 4: now stay with their parents it's well into their thirties.
- 33:44Speaker 4: And I was, you know, on my own in the
- 33:46Speaker 4: world at eighteen. But I have some had some resentment
- 33:51Speaker 4: towards my parents, mainly until I had my own kids
- 33:53Speaker 4: and I realized, oh, I was a big part of
- 33:55Speaker 4: the problem, not them, but in in terms of you know, hey,
- 34:02Speaker 4: take out the garbage. Then you do it all, you know,
- 34:05Speaker 4: half hearted, and you know, you get a slick remark
- 34:08Speaker 4: like you know, what's wrong with you? You know, anything like that.
- 34:11Speaker 4: You know, think of the old Italian parents saying what
- 34:16Speaker 4: do use do not? You know that type of thing,
- 34:18Speaker 4: and that was normal, It was just normal. And today's
- 34:23Speaker 4: standard tells you that that normal was really us being
- 34:27Speaker 4: used to trauma and abuse.
- 34:29Speaker 3: That this is abuse.
- 34:31Speaker 4: And while it may be, and I don't mean to
- 34:32Speaker 4: trivialize abuse, but I can tell you I worked for
- 34:36Speaker 4: the State of New Jersey in the Department of Children
- 34:38Speaker 4: and Families, and that was not the standard for abuse
- 34:42Speaker 4: at the time.
- 34:42Speaker 3: Right, It wasn't abuse, it wasn't neglect.
- 34:44Speaker 4: Now, you could make the case over a prolonged period
- 34:47Speaker 4: of time of telling a kid, what are you stupid?
- 34:49Speaker 4: What's wrong with you? Saying that over and over and
- 34:51Speaker 4: over may affect him. I'm pretty sure it can and
- 34:54Speaker 4: it will. But I think everybody's heard a comment like
- 34:57Speaker 4: that in a moment of frustration from a parent, which
- 34:58Speaker 4: is probably one of the hardest jobs. But the bottom
- 35:02Speaker 4: line is, yes, be fair and be kind. But how
- 35:06Speaker 4: many of us have that experience. And maybe some of
- 35:07Speaker 4: you listening to me are saying, oh, my gosh, Rich
- 35:10Speaker 4: your parents were tyrants.
- 35:11Speaker 3: I can't believe they were so unkind to you. I
- 35:13Speaker 3: don't know. I think my parents were terrific.
- 35:15Speaker 4: They did the best they could with what they had,
- 35:18Speaker 4: which wasn't a lot, right, and we all have to
- 35:23Speaker 4: move forward in life. I think we're built, we're designed
- 35:27Speaker 4: to survive. Now, that doesn't mean everybody gets a pass,
- 35:30Speaker 4: and if we can learn something from our mistakes, we should.
- 35:34Speaker 4: And I think as my parents got older, they became
- 35:37Speaker 4: better and they raised my kids, you know, as grandparents
- 35:41Speaker 4: for the time that they were around them, if you
- 35:43Speaker 4: can call it raising them. But you know, they treated
- 35:45Speaker 4: my kids, I would say, better than they treated me,
- 35:49Speaker 4: that's for sure, right, But they were older. They were older,
- 35:53Speaker 4: they were more tired, they had less energy to fight,
- 35:56Speaker 4: and there was you know, it's a different world plus
- 35:58Speaker 4: they raised me, So I raised some pretty good kids
- 36:01Speaker 4: and they had, you know, less of a hard headed
- 36:03Speaker 4: little kid to deal with in my opinion. But all
- 36:07Speaker 4: of that being said, today's modern psychologists, at least some
- 36:12Speaker 4: of them, are out there saying that you've got to
- 36:15Speaker 4: cut off your parents if they are the source of
- 36:17Speaker 4: your pain, and don't talk to them, protect your peace.
- 36:21Speaker 3: Now.
- 36:22Speaker 4: Doctor Aman's advice was to be kind, but hold accountable,
- 36:28Speaker 4: and it reminded me of a book by Jill Robin
- 36:31Speaker 4: Pain where she talks about having banter with empathy, a
- 36:36Speaker 4: phrase she's coined called empathy. And she's written a series
- 36:40Speaker 4: of books of which I have all and they're very
- 36:43Speaker 4: good and I recommend them. But Jill Robin Pain is
- 36:46Speaker 4: with us right now, and I want to get her
- 36:48Speaker 4: take on the conversation we're having.
- 36:50Speaker 3: Jill Robin Pain, licensed psychotherapist.
- 36:52Speaker 2: Welcome, Hey Rich, how you doing. Happy New Year, Happy
- 36:57Speaker 2: New Year to you too. We're starting out good here
- 37:00Speaker 2: in Houston. Seventy degrees.
- 37:02Speaker 3: Look at you.
- 37:03Speaker 4: I'm jealous flip flops and shorts if you give me
- 37:07Speaker 4: seventy degrees. So, Joe Robin Pain, there's a lot of
- 37:10Speaker 4: adult children that are now saying, look, I don't need it.
- 37:13Speaker 4: I don't need you to be in my life if
- 37:16Speaker 4: you are giving me a hard time, if you were
- 37:18Speaker 4: going to say, what are you stupid? For some people,
- 37:21Speaker 4: it's the exact opposite experience I had where I had
- 37:23Speaker 4: kids and gave my parents, my parents more grace. Some
- 37:26Speaker 4: people have kids and go, you know what, I don't
- 37:28Speaker 4: want my kids to grow up around these people because
- 37:29Speaker 4: these people are mean.
- 37:31Speaker 3: What do you say?
- 37:32Speaker 2: Well, I'm going to say that this has been going
- 37:36Speaker 2: on since my thirty four year old was growing up.
- 37:39Speaker 2: It started. So it is a cultural thing that we
- 37:42Speaker 2: are changing. A lot of our society on a whole
- 37:46Speaker 2: is taking away power from the parents, and it's very
- 37:52Speaker 2: important for parents to have have power. You could correctly
- 37:59Speaker 2: have power, because if you don't, then people aren't going
- 38:04Speaker 2: to uh, you know, the kids aren't going to They're
- 38:07Speaker 2: going to start taking an inch and then they take
- 38:09Speaker 2: a mile. And they need to know who is the
- 38:14Speaker 2: what is the word leader, not even the boss. So
- 38:17Speaker 2: in my book, remember I have a leader, a follower,
- 38:19Speaker 2: and a compromiser. Parents need to be the leader and
- 38:23Speaker 2: they need to write and they and what does a
- 38:26Speaker 2: leader do? In my book, beacon looks like a lighthouse.
- 38:29Speaker 2: They guide, they model, they enlighten, and that's what parents
- 38:33Speaker 2: are for. And what's happening in society is social media,
- 38:39Speaker 2: the Internet, all of this is taking control away from
- 38:42Speaker 2: the parents. I'm going to tell you it started with
- 38:45Speaker 2: my son, because back then, children can call the CPS
- 38:52Speaker 2: on you if you spank them. And I even had
- 38:57Speaker 2: a friend of mine tell her kid, well, you go
- 39:00Speaker 2: ahead and do that, then you'll be in the system.
- 39:02Speaker 2: That's fine with me. And so I think we need
- 39:05Speaker 2: to be more.
- 39:06Speaker 4: FII Joe, I just want you to know that's exactly
- 39:08Speaker 4: what I told my kids. Yeah, I worked there and
- 39:14Speaker 4: at that time, and I told them, I said, listen,
- 39:16Speaker 4: guess what happens, right, if you get any crazy ideas
- 39:18Speaker 4: you call them, they're taking you out of the house,
- 39:20Speaker 4: not me, And.
- 39:22Speaker 3: You're going to go a liv bit poem, not me.
- 39:24Speaker 4: Right.
- 39:25Speaker 2: Yeah, So I think we also need to be educated
- 39:28Speaker 2: and a lot of the concerns and it's not just me,
- 39:32Speaker 2: it's that social media communication breakdown is happening where the
- 39:39Speaker 2: screens are becoming the parents of the kids. And you're
- 39:43Speaker 2: going to see this and I'm not saying what we're
- 39:45Speaker 2: talking the studies are showing one in four families have
- 39:49Speaker 2: a strange individual from family members. So I mean it's
- 39:53Speaker 2: not everybody. We just need to look around. You'll see
- 39:57Speaker 2: little kids in restaurants. Parents are on their phones, and
- 40:02Speaker 2: you'll have kids on some device. And so we need
- 40:06Speaker 2: to just do more of face to face and show
- 40:09Speaker 2: the kids that we are their model, their leader. And
- 40:15Speaker 2: if they have questions, of course, remember we had an
- 40:18Speaker 2: interview and I said family meetings. We need family meetings
- 40:22Speaker 2: where people right, where people connect. So there's a big disconnect,
- 40:26Speaker 2: and I tell my clients the answer is not blocking.
- 40:30Speaker 2: The answer is not ghosting. The answer is bantering, bantering
- 40:36Speaker 2: back and forth, and that builds connection and then get
- 40:39Speaker 2: to know the person, start listening, looking and seeing what's
- 40:43Speaker 2: going on. And remember we talked about you don't have
- 40:46Speaker 2: to like your boss to get along with them. And
- 40:48Speaker 2: so what's happening in our generation because we've gone from
- 40:54Speaker 2: focusing on the importance of family and the responsibility of
- 40:59Speaker 2: taking care of parents and so forth, as we've gone
- 41:04Speaker 2: more to individualism and of course, well we have algorithms.
- 41:09Speaker 2: I'm right, you're wrong. I mean, it's a great day
- 41:12Speaker 2: when I'm on the Internet, Everything that comes to me
- 41:15Speaker 2: is all about Jill. So, yeah, we need to be
- 41:19Speaker 2: educated on this. And I really feel bad. It is
- 41:23Speaker 2: on the rise, and I think that I don't know
- 41:26Speaker 2: if you remember, and I think it was nineteen, it
- 41:28Speaker 2: was around twenty twenty two. Narcissistic parents.
- 41:33Speaker 7: It was a big thing. Oh yeah, you remember that.
- 41:37Speaker 3: It became a thing.
- 41:38Speaker 4: It started with parents and it went to boyfriends and
- 41:40Speaker 4: girlfriends and if anybody don't like, you're a narcissist.
- 41:43Speaker 2: Exactly exactly. And it got me so.
- 41:47Speaker 3: And I do remember it happened to me.
- 41:49Speaker 4: And I was actually interviewing a lady who wrote a
- 41:50Speaker 4: book on narcissism at the time, and I told her
- 41:52Speaker 4: about what.
- 41:53Speaker 3: Was going through.
- 41:54Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, it's wild. And so I even did a
- 41:58Speaker 2: little snippet on the difference is there's something called ecocentric,
- 42:03Speaker 2: which is from Pja and he was a theorist on children,
- 42:08Speaker 2: and this happened. This happens with kids from two to seven,
- 42:11Speaker 2: and you remember that age where it's all about them.
- 42:14Speaker 2: They do the peekaboo thing and they can only see
- 42:17Speaker 2: their point of view, and then there's egocentric where you're
- 42:21Speaker 2: you know, you're fabulous, it's all about you. Narcissism is
- 42:24Speaker 2: a little bit more in depth, where it's they know
- 42:28Speaker 2: what they do, they're doing, they're manipulating the situation, and
- 42:33Speaker 2: you know, and it's a very small percentage of our population,
- 42:37Speaker 2: so we just we didn't need to go to psychologists, psychiatrists,
- 42:44Speaker 2: psychotherapists to find out what really is happening when it's
- 42:49Speaker 2: something emotional or psychological.
- 42:51Speaker 3: J Robin Pain.
- 42:51Speaker 4: There's so many people listening right now that may either
- 42:55Speaker 4: have a friend or a family member. I mean, just
- 42:58Speaker 4: moments ago, I was tea this upcoming segment and one
- 43:02Speaker 4: of my longtime callers, Sue from a Shanksville, Pennsylvania, called
- 43:06Speaker 4: in and said that her family estrangement was with her
- 43:10Speaker 4: and her sister, that her sister stopped talking to her
- 43:13Speaker 4: because she's pro Trump and the sister is not, and
- 43:16Speaker 4: and even made a post saying, look, sometimes when you
- 43:18Speaker 4: have people who are part of the problem, you have
- 43:21Speaker 4: to do something about it. And what she decided to
- 43:23Speaker 4: do about it was stop talking to her sister. And
- 43:25Speaker 4: when you see this answer right now, I've had this
- 43:29Speaker 4: problem with your profession for quite some time in that
- 43:32Speaker 4: I think, and it's not personal to you right. It's
- 43:36Speaker 4: just a critique on those that side with.
- 43:41Speaker 3: Separation. Right.
- 43:43Speaker 4: I think separation can be therapeutic at times, but I
- 43:45Speaker 4: don't think the answer is, Oh, you and your wife
- 43:47Speaker 4: don't get along, You guys should get a divorce. Oh
- 43:49Speaker 4: you don't like your parents. Oh they you know, they
- 43:52Speaker 4: said you didn't clean your room and you need to
- 43:54Speaker 4: do better. Well, that's abuse, And I'm trivializing something that's
- 43:58Speaker 4: a little more complicated, but I'm doing it for the
- 44:01Speaker 4: sake of saying there. There's a whole school of thought
- 44:03Speaker 4: out there, and there's books that are talking about protecting
- 44:06Speaker 4: your peace at all costs, and they recommend as a
- 44:11Speaker 4: last alternative, cutting these people off. Now I understand that
- 44:14Speaker 4: that's always a risk, you know, consideration. But the last
- 44:19Speaker 4: thing in the world I'm going to do, Joe Robin
- 44:21Speaker 4: Vain is call you and agreed to pay your fee
- 44:24Speaker 4: per hour to end up just stopping talking with.
- 44:27Speaker 2: Everybody, right, and then we've become isolated, which is a
- 44:31Speaker 2: lot of what's happening. So I don't, you know, I
- 44:35Speaker 2: don't talk like that. So I would tell people that first,
- 44:39Speaker 2: to look at the whole picture. I tell people, and
- 44:42Speaker 2: it depends that they've been sexually abused, emotionally abused, right
- 44:47Speaker 2: because a crime involved, Right, how is it affecting their life?
- 44:51Speaker 2: What really happened? And even I like kids to know
- 45:00Speaker 2: both parents because they need to know where they come from.
- 45:03Speaker 2: So if someone is abusive, I'd like them to be
- 45:08Speaker 2: if they are have someone with the child at the time,
- 45:13Speaker 2: so they at least or at a later date in
- 45:15Speaker 2: their life. People need to know where they come from.
- 45:18Speaker 2: And as I have friends that have had children just
- 45:23Speaker 2: break off from them, and I tell them, one, be patient, rich,
- 45:27Speaker 2: be patient, and I say, be consistent. Now that we
- 45:30Speaker 2: have texting, it's so wonderful. You can text people just
- 45:33Speaker 2: say hi, thinking of you don't expect anything to come
- 45:37Speaker 2: and and just sort of wait it out. Also a
- 45:40Speaker 2: mindset knowing that this is going to work out. This
- 45:44Speaker 2: is what I tell people, because if you have hope,
- 45:47Speaker 2: have hope. If you don't have hope, you might as
- 45:50Speaker 2: well be dead. So and that goes with anything. And
- 45:53Speaker 2: I truly believe in the law of attraction. So I
- 45:55Speaker 2: like to focus on if I'm having problems with my husband,
- 45:59Speaker 2: I focus on what I want him to do, not
- 46:01Speaker 2: what I don't want him to do. And then usually
- 46:04Speaker 2: it happened. So I think that goes with this conversing
- 46:09Speaker 2: with people and taking people out of our lives. You
- 46:12Speaker 2: don't learn anything if you just push people out and
- 46:14Speaker 2: you can limit There's so many different things you can
- 46:17Speaker 2: do with people when you.
- 46:18Speaker 4: Get yeah, well, and that's what I think creating effective
- 46:21Speaker 4: boundaries comes into place, right. But for some people, the boundary,
- 46:24Speaker 4: the automatic boundary is you're out now the other side
- 46:27Speaker 4: of that question, and in just a couple of minutes
- 46:28Speaker 4: that we have remaining, I want to get your sense
- 46:32Speaker 4: of right now. I think the advice you gave is
- 46:33Speaker 4: to the parent, right the parent that's listening that has
- 46:36Speaker 4: an adult twenty something or thirty something, be patient. So
- 46:40Speaker 4: what do you tell that twenty something or thirty something
- 46:42Speaker 4: that's like, look, I feel like I am less than
- 46:47Speaker 4: as a person because every time I made a mistake,
- 46:50Speaker 4: I was punished for this mistake and I wasn't allowed
- 46:54Speaker 4: to scrape my knee and learn as like some of
- 46:56Speaker 4: my friends were. And when I got to college, I
- 46:58Speaker 4: realized it's a whole different world out here. And some
- 47:00Speaker 4: parents just go, that's okay, sweetie, better luck next time.
- 47:03Speaker 4: And some parents are harder than on their kids than others.
- 47:06Speaker 4: What do you say to the kid that's saying, you
- 47:08Speaker 4: know what I