Latest / You're Overqualified Podcast - Career and Leadership Strategies for Women / 90. Is Your Job Slowly Draining You? Here’s What It’s Costing You

Transcript

90. Is Your Job Slowly Draining You? Here’s What It’s Costing You · You're Overqualified Podcast - Career and Leadership Strategies for Women

• 0:08
  Hi, I'm Danny Tan and if you are here, you are in the right
• 0:12
  place. Welcome to the Pivot and
• 0:13
  Promotion podcast where we say forget the rules because they
• 0:16
  weren't written for us. I'm Danny Tan.
• 0:18
  I'm your host as well as. Career and leadership.
• 0:20
  Coach and a proud advocate for redefining what success.
• 0:23
  And leadership looks like. And here's.
• 0:25
  What I know you can lead at any level you can pivot.
• 0:28
  At any age. And you can make.
• 0:30
  Moves that feel. Right for you.
• 0:31
  Whether you're climbing the perfect.
• 0:33
  Ladder, starting something completely new or just figuring
• 0:35
  out your next step? I've got you covered with
• 0:37
  strategies, stories, and straight up inspiration.
• 0:39
  So let's make some moves. Hello.
• 0:47
  So today we're going to talk. About is your job slowly?
• 0:49
  Draining you and here's what it's costing you.
• 0:52
  So one of the things that I will hear a lot is I'm just so tired
• 0:57
  or I feel really numb or I feel really exhausted or I feel
• 0:59
  checked out. And so let's talk about how you
• 1:02
  can one identify the signs that if your job is draining you,
• 1:06
  right? And maybe that doesn't feel
• 1:08
  super. Urgent.
• 1:08
  There's these. Little things that are coming up
• 1:10
  and then what could be the potential cost when it they are
• 1:14
  saying that you are draining these?
• 1:15
  Little signals. So what could be these like?
• 1:17
  Hidden. What's to say what's?
• 1:19
  Way to put it like a little expenses.
• 1:21
  That are being taken on account of you know your job draining
• 1:25
  you and then just knowing that identifying it noticing how it
• 1:28
  may be chipping away at you doesn't need to bring it all
• 1:31
  down that you could just honestly take a.
• 1:32
  Look at it reflect. At it, notice it and see if you
• 1:35
  want to take it a little bit more seriously and make a change
• 1:37
  and. The changes have to be
• 1:39
  immediate, it can be later all as well.
• 1:41
  But it's just something to note, so let's go ahead and jump into
• 1:44
  how to identify. Is your job slowly?
• 1:46
  Draining you and what is that cost?
• 1:48
  What does that cost to you? So we love.
• 1:50
  Phases here, so phase. One's going to be the signs that
• 1:53
  you're being drained that maybe don't feel like super urgent,
• 1:55
  but they're definitely starting to come up.
• 1:57
  And so maybe you're not fully burnt out.
• 2:00
  You're not like, OK, I'm not like completely burnt out.
• 2:02
  I want you to like. Take a sabbatical.
• 2:04
  Or take months off, but you're starting to notice that every
• 2:06
  single day your energy's just been off a little bit more and
• 2:09
  more. Maybe you're just a little bit
• 2:11
  more sluggish or a little bit more tired.
• 2:14
  You're having a slower. Start.
• 2:16
  Maybe you're starting to fall off of like the things that you
• 2:18
  do that help, you know, serve you.
• 2:20
  So for example, if you're like, I'm kind of falling off doing my
• 2:23
  movement or I've kind of fallen off on, you know, how I nourish
• 2:25
  myself. These are some good signs of,
• 2:28
  OK, something may be coming up or you're starting to feel
• 2:30
  drained or a little burned out, but maybe not full on.
• 2:33
  And the things that you can kind of take into account in your
• 2:36
  day-to-day is when it comes to like your work, are you kind of
• 2:39
  having the Sunday scaries? Are you dreading going to a
• 2:42
  certain? Meeting or kind of feeling a
• 2:44
  little bit like, I don't even know, Like let's use the word
• 2:46
  cynical about certain. Things that are.
• 2:48
  Being said at work or in a meeting or maybe you're even
• 2:51
  just numbing to yourself, but you just keep telling yourself
• 2:53
  it's busy season, but it's been busy season for like 6 months
• 2:56
  now or maybe even a year. And you're kind of like, yeah,
• 2:59
  I'll just, I'll just keep pushing through.
• 3:00
  I'll keep making it work. And so these may be signals that
• 3:03
  like, not everything is completely falling apart.
• 3:05
  But it is maybe. Slowly wearing on you a little
• 3:08
  bit slowly and so I'll share one of my my clients here one of my
• 3:12
  clients she actually is a complete is a freelancer and she
• 3:16
  did her notice and she. Was really exhausted.
• 3:18
  And a little bit emotionally checked out.
• 3:20
  She was noticing that she wasn't really connecting like with her
• 3:22
  emotions or her body, and she was just kind of like pushing
• 3:24
  through. The day-to-day to try to make
• 3:26
  everything work. She's.
• 3:27
  Also navigating first time motherhood and so trying to do
• 3:31
  that while also trying to balance a job search has been a
• 3:34
  bit much, right? And so just knowing that when
• 3:37
  you have multiple things you're juggling, so you're trying to
• 3:41
  get a new job, you're you're trying to maintain being new to
• 3:44
  motherhood, you're trying to create the safety and security
• 3:47
  for your family and for yourself.
• 3:49
  A lot. Of things that we started
• 3:50
  noticing is that she just felt like things weren't working for
• 3:53
  her when it came to her job search, you know, and that she
• 3:56
  knew that she was trying to manage everything at once.
• 3:58
  And so the biggest thing that I start to notice is that versus
• 4:01
  like adding more on, you know, which I think a lot of people
• 4:05
  anticipate with coaching, they're like, oh, we're just
• 4:06
  going to add on every single task that's needed.
• 4:08
  Sometimes it's actually like taking a a step back, sitting
• 4:11
  and taking a look at what is currently going on in the
• 4:13
  situation and seeing. Does it actually?
• 4:15
  Serve you to have more. Or does.
• 4:18
  It serve you to kind of like take a.
• 4:19
  Pause and see where you may need.
• 4:20
  Support. So for example.
• 4:22
  I call. It a support plan, so sometimes
• 4:24
  it's important to have a support plan for yourself whether that
• 4:27
  is. OK, what do you need to take
• 4:29
  care of yourself in order to help?
• 4:30
  Maybe ease out of this early onset burnout and that could be
• 4:34
  something like scheduling and creating a support.
• 4:37
  For yourself, whether it's. Movement.
• 4:38
  It can be something so tiny like even if it's.
• 4:40
  Just like. Getting up and walking around
• 4:42
  your desk like on the hour at least every.
• 4:44
  Three hours or just. Staying stagnant for so long, it
• 4:47
  could be finding like a friend that you can like.
• 4:49
  Verbally process ideas. With right it could be something
• 4:51
  so. Simple just making.
• 4:52
  Sure that you're having enough water in the day and so these
• 4:55
  little things will. Really help, just give you a
• 4:57
  little. Bit more support and
• 4:58
  nourishment, but they're the first things that go when we go
• 5:01
  into go go mode when it comes to our works, when it comes to our
• 5:03
  businesses with when it comes to your careers you.
• 5:05
  Start to like. Put those things to the side and
• 5:07
  we kind of get sucked in this energy of like.
• 5:09
  Chug, chug, chug, chug, chug. Through and.
• 5:11
  So when we created her support plan, the biggest thing that
• 5:14
  changed? Was versus.
• 5:16
  Constantly putting to the. Side her needs.
• 5:19
  Whether it was, you know, just getting some fun, like just
• 5:21
  getting outside of the house, just getting a glass of like
• 5:24
  drinking some more water, right? Just being able to find like
• 5:27
  another group of moms that she could share with versus putting
• 5:30
  that to the side and just kind of like only focusing on the job
• 5:33
  search or only focusing on everyone else's needs.
• 5:36
  When we started to implement her support plan, she.
• 5:38
  Started to realize OK. By doing this audit on what is
• 5:42
  going on for my life and taking a step back and actually did not
• 5:45
  slow her down and. Helped her move forward.
• 5:47
  And I think sometimes we think that if we slow down, that means
• 5:49
  we're going to like lose momentum, we're going to drop
• 5:51
  the ball. But sometimes we actually have
• 5:52
  to slow down and it leads us to speeding up the process because
• 5:55
  we're re energized and we have the support that we need.
• 5:58
  Which ultimately allowed her to start to land interviews because
• 6:00
  then she was showing up with a different kind of energy as
• 6:02
  well. She was doing her application
• 6:04
  with a different kind of energy. She was doing her conversations
• 6:07
  and her intentional informational interviews with a
• 6:09
  different energy as well versus coming from like the end of the.
• 6:11
  Last straw that she. Had so my question and my prompt
• 6:15
  for you. Is what?
• 6:16
  Symptoms of misalignment? Have you been maybe downplaying
• 6:20
  or rationalizing for yourself? So I'm curious.
• 6:23
  Just think about what? Symptoms of misalignment have
• 6:27
  been you. Have you my?
• 6:28
  Gosh, tongue tied today. What symptoms of misalignment
• 6:31
  have you been downplaying or rationalizing?
• 6:34
  So for example, maybe you're noticing, yeah, I'm not sluggish
• 6:38
  like just on Mondays. I've actually been sluggish
• 6:40
  every single. Day this week or.
• 6:42
  I keep telling myself that it's going to stop being busy, but
• 6:45
  it's been like this for six months now and I keep saying I'm
• 6:48
  going to take. A break and take like a.
• 6:51
  Vacation or like even a few days off, but I still haven't done
• 6:53
  yet because there's always something more to do, right?
• 6:56
  Or even just saying to yourself, like I keep saying, I'm going
• 6:59
  to, you know, start doing some more movement in my day and I
• 7:02
  just keep putting it off because there's never enough time.
• 7:04
  So the things that that there, I wouldn't say that there will
• 7:07
  never be enough time, right to do all of the things, but
• 7:10
  knowing that, what are you prioritizing that's going to
• 7:12
  help take care of you, nourish yourself first.
• 7:14
  Before you have. Like the bigger burnout come
• 7:16
  because when the bigger burnout comes, it's actually going to
• 7:19
  stop you for much longer. And something we talk about a
• 7:21
  lot in coaching with my clients. Is the cycle of.
• 7:24
  Support and recovery from burnout and how it starts to
• 7:27
  shorten that window when you identify the signs earlier on
• 7:30
  and actually slow down and. Support yourself earlier on
• 7:33
  reduces the window of. You being frozen and burnt out
• 7:36
  versus when we keep pushing through, keep pushing through,
• 7:38
  we think it's going to keep us from not having to slow down
• 7:41
  actually ends up slowing us down because we get so burnt out by
• 7:44
  the time we. Get there.
• 7:45
  It actually delays our our process.
• 7:46
  Much longer. So just want to have you reflect
• 7:50
  on that when it comes to just the signs that maybe you're
• 7:52
  noticing that you don't feel as urgent but could be signaling.
• 7:55
  To you that you are. Being drained and so phase. 2
• 7:59
  is. The most important part that I
• 8:01
  think I want to underline is the hidden cost of staying in this
• 8:07
  energy of burnout, right? Or in this energy of draining
• 8:11
  even when we think it's fine, right?
• 8:13
  So the hidden cost of staying. So whether that is a job?
• 8:17
  For you, a type of manager, a relationship.
• 8:21
  Like whatever that could be like let's.
• 8:22
  Talk about the hidden cost of staying.
• 8:24
  So, you know, the most thing, the thing that I think is most
• 8:27
  important to like know is that staying in the wrong thing,
• 8:31
  whether it's the wrong role, the wrong relationship for people
• 8:35
  that just say not the right one for right now, it's sort of.
• 8:38
  Slowly chip away. Actually at your confidence and
• 8:41
  your motivation and your clarity.
• 8:43
  And so I think this is the thing that people don't notice the
• 8:45
  most is when they come to me and they have been working at a
• 8:50
  company for a long period of time and they know that it
• 8:51
  wasn't the right fit and they couldn't find the right time to
• 8:54
  move, which is completely fine. They also.
• 8:57
  Might realize they've kind of lost confidence in themselves
• 8:59
  they've lost belief in themselves because they're in
• 9:01
  environments that don't support them, that don't cheer them on,
• 9:04
  that don't help them grow, that don't help them build and so
• 9:07
  they. Start to lose their.
• 9:08
  Confidence in their. Abilities.
• 9:09
  They also start to lose motivation.
• 9:10
  Because they think like OK, well you know what?
• 9:13
  Am I even good at? Or like, do I even care?
• 9:15
  Like here I just AM and they start to lose clarity.
• 9:17
  Of like what it is that they actually.
• 9:18
  Want right, because they're in a sense just sitting with what is
• 9:21
  that they have and so I think this is something that's.
• 9:24
  Really really really like the secret.
• 9:26
  The secret biggest cost or the secret?
• 9:28
  Big expense of staying in something that maybe is not
• 9:30
  aligned with what you want and. Is it could be literally
• 9:34
  relationships It could be. The kind of.
• 9:36
  Collaborations. You do within your business and
• 9:38
  partnerships. It could be within your job.
• 9:41
  And that's the thing that I think terrifies you the most.
• 9:44
  When I work with somebody, I'm like, no, I don't want that
• 9:47
  manager to have taken this big toll and effect on your
• 9:49
  confidence. I don't want this organization
• 9:51
  who doesn't believe that you should have balance and spend
• 9:54
  time with your kids and that that's not important to like
• 9:56
  take a toll on like what you have.
• 9:58
  To offer. And I think that's one of the
• 10:00
  biggest expenses that I see and so.
• 10:02
  Yourself trust starts to take a hit.
• 10:04
  Every time you override your intuition.
• 10:06
  So every time you say no, everything's fine, or I'm OK, or
• 10:11
  it's just like this for this month, or they only meant it.
• 10:14
  They meant, they said that, but they meant this every time.
• 10:16
  You're overriding your intuition and you're rationalizing.
• 10:19
  These situations or you're. Downplaying these situations,
• 10:22
  you're actually starting to. Take a hit to yourself.
• 10:25
  Trust. And so a lot of.
• 10:27
  Folks will say, well, I. Just want to make sure I make
• 10:28
  the right decision. I want to make sure I have
• 10:30
  clarity or I want to make sure that I'm doing the right thing.
• 10:33
  But The thing is, is if you have constantly started to
• 10:35
  rationalize and downplay these signs of draining of, you know,
• 10:41
  just things that are chipping you.
• 10:42
  Away. It actually starts to take a
• 10:43
  toll. Also on your.
• 10:45
  Ability to trust yourself. And your decision making and so
• 10:48
  we. Start to just stay in things and
• 10:49
  think things are OK. And that becomes like our new
• 10:52
  baseline of what is acceptable and normal.
• 10:55
  And that is one of the most terrifying things for me is.
• 10:57
  To. Be in environments or spaces or
• 10:59
  around people who are going to essentially like bring down or
• 11:05
  hold back. The ability for you to be
• 11:08
  successful, the ability for you just to grow, for you to be at.
• 11:11
  Peace and for you to be happy and that's just because you know
• 11:14
  we're we're letting ourselves or there's times that we are stuck
• 11:17
  in situations that do not serve us and so.
• 11:20
  I just say like, think about. When something feels misaligned
• 11:23
  to. Really sit with it.
• 11:25
  And versus like downplaying it, rationalizing it, saying
• 11:27
  everything's fine, it's. Like really just like sit with
• 11:30
  it and be like, is this OK? Is this is this?
• 11:34
  Hurting me is am I overriding my intuition, my belief in myself
• 11:38
  and am I whittling my trust to make these decisions?
• 11:41
  Because that's a big and that will end up coming up is like in
• 11:43
  coaching, we're typically rebuilding your confidence and
• 11:46
  we're rebuilding your ability to feel clarity and.
• 11:50
  To trust yourself. Again that.
• 11:51
  Clarity comes from the ability to have trust from yourself and
• 11:54
  the ability to take. Action even when it feels scary
• 11:57
  and so the longer that you stay in these situations, the.
• 11:59
  Harder, it feels to. Believe that change.
• 12:01
  Is possible, so that's what I have folks who have.
• 12:04
  Been in a career for 20 years, 25 years, 15 years and they're
• 12:07
  ready to make a change and they don't know if it's even.
• 12:09
  Possible. Right like I have.
• 12:11
  Career pivoters who are 5060 plus.
• 12:14
  And they will. Say OK, but.
• 12:15
  I don't even know if. It's tough because they've had
• 12:17
  in a beautiful. Long amount of experience and
• 12:19
  things that they've done, but when they have stayed in
• 12:22
  something for so long and they haven't.
• 12:23
  Necessarily practiced the. The art of change.
• 12:26
  At different. Phases then it feels a little
• 12:28
  bit more difficult, right Or if you're even early on your career
• 12:31
  and you're like, I've only done this one thing, can I do
• 12:33
  something new IT feels really daunting but.
• 12:35
  That is the biggest. Thing is like the pivot process
• 12:38
  is one of the biggest things that I have a focus on because.
• 12:41
  It is acceptable. And OK to change.
• 12:43
  Especially in a. Society that keeps telling us
• 12:45
  that we have to do everything the same and like the stay in
• 12:47
  one lane and to stay in one structure and to stay on a
• 12:49
  certain ladder. Like who's that actually serving
• 12:51
  we? Are multifaceted, multi
• 12:53
  dimensioned and there's so many different things that you can
• 12:55
  learn and so just knowing that. There are these hidden costs of
• 12:58
  just. Overriding these things and
• 13:00
  staying where you're currently at versus practicing, actually
• 13:02
  practicing, learning the skills and the.
• 13:04
  Abilities of. Being able to change and make
• 13:06
  change happen for yourself. So one of the clients that I'll
• 13:10
  I'll talk to you. She was in her.
• 13:12
  Role for about Let's see 4. Years and getting Passover.
• 13:16
  Promotion, promotion, promotion, promotion.
• 13:18
  And the biggest thing was that she would just kept telling
• 13:20
  herself, well, I got feedback that I don't have enough
• 13:23
  managerial experience or I got feedback that I don't speak up
• 13:27
  enough or I got feedback that I haven't built enough relations
• 13:29
  with or I don't have enough experience in this, this and
• 13:31
  that. And so the biggest things when
• 13:34
  we were focusing on our sessions.
• 13:35
  Was that? It wasn't that she.
• 13:37
  Wasn't capable of all. Of those things, maybe she
• 13:40
  didn't have someone there to support her and mentor.
• 13:42
  Her or coach her to develop those skill sets.
• 13:44
  But the other thing is, is that since she had been only being
• 13:47
  fed those things for. Three to four years without the
• 13:50
  support. Plan to really help.
• 13:52
  Her, she started to take a hit to.
• 13:54
  Her confidence and her abilities and her skill set, when in
• 13:57
  reality you know, before she works.
• 13:59
  There she had been. Done a big career pivot and a
• 14:01
  big jump from working in stores to working for the retail side
• 14:06
  of a company, a really big company.
• 14:07
  And so it's almost like she had forgotten all of.
• 14:10
  Her abilities, her skill sets, her.
• 14:12
  Experience everything that she's amazing at, and that's because
• 14:15
  when you're in an environment that necessarily is not
• 14:17
  supporting you in. Building you up.
• 14:18
  It starts to whittle. Away.
• 14:20
  This and so the. Biggest thing that.
• 14:21
  We worked on with. Her is really to.
• 14:24
  Identify what it was. That her skill sets were what
• 14:26
  her experience is it was like. Collecting the evidence.
• 14:29
  And so we're collecting the receipts, we're collecting the
• 14:31
  evidence of. OK, what are all?
• 14:32
  The times that you. Were successful.
• 14:34
  What are all the times that you made change happened?
• 14:36
  What are all the times that you did learn new?
• 14:37
  Skills that you did were able to like push yourself out of your
• 14:41
  box and be able to build relationships.
• 14:42
  And network because there has to be some way.
• 14:44
  And so I think that is the biggest thing is being able to
• 14:47
  identify. What you already have.
• 14:49
  As evidence and data in your life that shows.
• 14:51
  That you have been successful, you have been able to do these
• 14:53
  things. And then being.
• 14:54
  Able to make sure. Outside of like reminding
• 14:56
  yourself of that and rebuilding your confidence, rebuilding
• 14:59
  yourself. Trust and self belief.
• 15:01
  Is then creating a plan of having the support to take.
• 15:03
  Action to do it. And so that was the biggest
• 15:05
  thing for her and so. Going from somebody who?
• 15:08
  Was basically passive for promotion multiple times and
• 15:12
  said that she needed more of XY and.
• 15:14
  Z She was able to start to really.
• 15:16
  Really believe in herself again and regain this confidence for
• 15:18
  herself again. So she was able to network with
• 15:21
  different departments and get a new job and get a new role and
• 15:23
  something that she was more aligned with.
• 15:25
  And then she ended up being able to network with everyone this
• 15:28
  way to Sunday and create more visibility and have stronger
• 15:31
  presentations. As she started to.
• 15:32
  Rebuild her belief and her confidence in herself.
• 15:34
  And so I think that's something that we don't realize it's even
• 15:38
  costing us, right, because. If you are.
• 15:40
  Staying in a place that doesn't necessarily help and support
• 15:44
  you. What is it doing?
• 15:46
  It's actually like not helping your skills develop.
• 15:48
  It's not helping your confidence develop.
• 15:50
  It's also holding you back when it comes to your salary and the.
• 15:54
  Trajectory of your career. And an honesty, just like the
• 15:56
  belief in yourself at times. And it's not to say.
• 15:59
  That our roles or our careers. Define who we are and our.
• 16:03
  Value, but there is something to say about.
• 16:05
  Being in an environment that don't necessarily.
• 16:07
  Build you up. And that they are really
• 16:09
  important, the people that you surround yourself and the
• 16:10
  environment you surround. Yourself.
• 16:12
  So how can you go ahead? And find ways.
• 16:13
  To support yourself so that way you are able to.
• 16:16
  Be the person is that you want to be, do the things you want to
• 16:18
  do. And so my prompt for this
• 16:20
  section would be what has you staying in this?
• 16:24
  Role that's already. Costing you.
• 16:26
  So why are you staying in a role right now that potentially is
• 16:29
  costing you? Maybe your energy, your
• 16:30
  confidence? For clarity, I'm super.
• 16:32
  Curious of what that Y is. And if it's worth it, right?
• 16:35
  So if you're thinking. About maybe like a role that
• 16:38
  you're in right now or a part of your life that you're in right
• 16:41
  now or relationship that you're in right now.
• 16:43
  What is it costing you? What is the expense?
• 16:47
  Is it? Happiness, more peace, more
• 16:49
  money, more alignment in your life and is it worth your
• 16:53
  energy? Is it worth your confidence?
• 16:54
  Is it worth? Your clarity, all right.
• 16:57
  So let's talk about. The last phase, right, So we
• 17:00
  talked about. In general, the signs of
• 17:03
  identifying being drains, the hidden costs of staying within
• 17:06
  those faces, environments and people.
• 17:07
  And the third thing is like, we don't have to burn it all down
• 17:10
  like it doesn't. Have to be that.
• 17:11
  Dramatic. And it doesn't have to be like.
• 17:13
  Be like, OK, it's all. Going away.
• 17:14
  I have to leave this environment.
• 17:15
  I have to leave this thing No, well, the biggest, the biggest
• 17:18
  and most important thing is just identifying it at 1st and then
• 17:21
  understanding what those expenses are contributing to
• 17:23
  that and then figuring out OK, we don't have to like start from
• 17:26
  scratch. So here's the thing.
• 17:28
  I just want you to start to notice these things earlier on
• 17:31
  versus later, because the big thing that will happen is that
• 17:35
  we will make a change once everything is like falling
• 17:38
  apart, when we're completely drained, when the when
• 17:40
  everything has like hurt us and broken us and.
• 17:42
  We feel like. You know, basically betrayed in
• 17:45
  so many different ways. Whether?
• 17:46
  It is our jobs or our careers. And so I.
• 17:49
  Rather, you start. To identify earlier on the
• 17:52
  signals and signs that are coming up for you that's
• 17:55
  emotionally, mentally, physically and versus
• 17:57
  discounting them and ignoring them is thinking about.
• 17:59
  OK, like. How often is this coming up?
• 18:02
  How often am I feeling this way? How often is this happening for
• 18:05
  me and what and what is the cost of that so that way you can
• 18:08
  start to identify these things earlier on to.
• 18:10
  Support yourself earlier. On right, you don't have to wait
• 18:13
  to be miserable to make a move. You can make a move earlier on.
• 18:17
  It's actually easier to make a move when you are happy and
• 18:20
  you're just curious and you're just looking around and
• 18:22
  researching. Versus when you have to do it
• 18:24
  because. Everything is falling apart, so
• 18:27
  I always highly recommend that no matter what it is.
• 18:29
  It's like. Versus waiting to the.
• 18:30
  End of when everything is in pain and painful and no fun to
• 18:35
  actually always. Be out there.
• 18:36
  Looking and seeing what's around and having an understanding of
• 18:39
  that because tuning in to this like discomfort, this quiet
• 18:44
  discomfort earlier on is going. To be a better signal for.
• 18:46
  You and it's also going to help you start to.
• 18:48
  Believe and trust in yourself. Trust yourself.
• 18:50
  Believe. And your confidence in yourself
• 18:53
  and your intuition versus discounting it.
• 18:54
  And let me tell you. Like the?
• 18:57
  Like the final, the final round or whatever of the video game,
• 19:00
  whatever they want to. Say it's like your.
• 19:01
  Body is going to tell you when you're out of alignment.
• 19:03
  It's like the biggest sign when we have suppressed our emotions,
• 19:06
  we have suppressed all of the feelings and thoughts your.
• 19:09
  Body will start to. Act out when it's saying you're
• 19:11
  out of alignment. So notice if you are having, you
• 19:14
  know, anything that comes up of like tension or pain or aches,
• 19:17
  anything like that stomach, that's usually a big thing.
• 19:20
  Too like. Digestion, that will happen too.
• 19:22
  So one of my amazing clients, I would definitely say she was
• 19:27
  working at a nonprofit in education and she just kept
• 19:31
  knowing that something was off in the space that she was in.
• 19:33
  Basically, they were not super. Supportive of people of.
• 19:37
  Color in general, and it was a school and so her responsibility
• 19:41
  was. Being able to fill.
• 19:42
  Seats in students and so there was just a big disconnection of.
• 19:47
  What was happening for her? She started to notice that she
• 19:48
  had like. Chronic.
• 19:49
  Fatigue she was always. Having tension in her like her
• 19:52
  right shoulder and there was just a disconnection that this.
• 19:55
  Just wasn't the job. Even though she got on that job
• 19:58
  and she. Was super excited because she
• 19:59
  got a promotion. She got a raise and all these
• 20:01
  great things. But she started to realize that
• 20:02
  like there was just. Signs that what she wanted and.
• 20:05
  What she valued. Was not in alignment with what
• 20:07
  they sold her right and so to be able to start to identify the
• 20:11
  notice. That she could have just said to
• 20:12
  herself, well. Well, you know, kind of like
• 20:15
  maybe. This is just.
• 20:16
  How they are, you know, filling seats this for this semester and
• 20:19
  it's completely different. Or she could have said, oh,
• 20:21
  maybe. This is just how the.
• 20:22
  The leadership leads, but maybe it'll be different now then I'm
• 20:24
  here. And so yes, of course.
• 20:26
  Could it be? Definitely, but I think the
• 20:28
  most. Important piece is that years
• 20:30
  before at a previous. Company she had constantly like
• 20:33
  put to the side. Like the the.
• 20:36
  Undermining and undervalue. That she felt.
• 20:38
  And then she came into their school and she realized, wait a
• 20:40
  minute, I think there's things that are coming up.
• 20:43
  So the crazy thing is, is that she actually was bold enough to
• 20:47
  say, you know what? This doesn't feel like it's
• 20:49
  aligned with me. And so she ended up giving
• 20:51
  notice and create an exit plan to find a new role.
• 20:54
  And she ended up finding a company that was truly.
• 20:56
  Allowed to vows and she feels really.
• 20:57
  Good about going there every single day, but it's.
• 20:59
  Because. She really started to tune in
• 21:00
  and listen. To what it is that is.
• 21:03
  Coming up for her. Showing up for her, how she's
• 21:05
  feeling, whether that's fatigue, whether.
• 21:06
  That's tension, all of those things and making sure that it's
• 21:09
  in alignment. So I would just say, you know,
• 21:12
  when it comes to this, think about what is your energy trying
• 21:15
  to tell you. And what would you?
• 21:16
  What would it mean to take it? Seriously.
• 21:18
  So when your energy is like dipping if it's slow.
• 21:20
  If there is fatigue. What is it trying to say to you?
• 21:24
  If it were to say something. And.
• 21:26
  What would you? Do what are you willing to do to
• 21:28
  kind of like help support that and to help support yourself?
• 21:31
  All right, so. This was today's.
• 21:34
  Episode and just to recap we were just identifying what if
• 21:38
  your job. Or life or.
• 21:39
  Something is just. Slowly training you.
• 21:41
  What is that cost right and knowing.
• 21:43
  That you don't. Have to burn it down, but maybe
• 21:44
  there's something that you can do to start taking a little bit
• 21:46
  more seriously. And so I say this, don't wait
• 21:50
  until it gets until it. Gets to the worst.
• 21:52
  Scenario really start to notice and identify and start.
• 21:55
  To see OK what can I do that will help?
• 21:57
  Support and energize me and be aligned instead.
• 21:59
  And so if this is something of interest to you, you'll hear
• 22:02
  more coming up, but this is what?
• 22:04
  We do. In the pivot and promotion
• 22:05
  community as well within coaching.
• 22:07
  And so let's create a plan so we don't feel like you're super,
• 22:09
  super drained. To the things that you do.
• 22:11
  Life is very, very short so. You might as well be happy doing
• 22:14
  what you're doing. All right.
• 22:15
  Well, thank you so much and I will talk to you soon.
• 22:20
  Thank you again for tuning into today's podcast.
• 22:23
  I hope this episode gave you some strategies and insights to
• 22:26
  shake up on how you lead in life and business.
• 22:29
  If this inspire you to take action and you're wondering.
• 22:31
  What? Is it like to work together?
• 22:32
  There are three different ways we can work together.
• 22:34
  The first one is private coaching.
• 22:36
  If you're looking to build something from the ground up,
• 22:39
  whether it is break into a new industry, really own your
• 22:42
  leadership on a deeper. Level and lead teams.
• 22:45
  Or if you're looking to build your business, then private
• 22:48
  coaching is definitely for you. It's that one one hands on
• 22:51
  support that custom personalization of being able to
• 22:53
  make that happen. And so typically within private
• 22:56
  coaching we are developing and having you own your expertise.
• 22:59
  We're really growing your. Ability to do strategic.
• 23:01
  Decision making, build that confidence within yourself and
• 23:04
  make sure that you're going after what you really want and
• 23:06
  not settling for what you think you deserve, which I love.
• 23:09
  The second one is my group coaching program, which is the
• 23:11
  pivot and promotion community. This is a 12 month program, so
• 23:16
  for a full year. It is for career development,
• 23:18
  for growth, for accountability, for Shared learning.
• 23:21
  So if you're someone who likes the community space, a group
• 23:24
  setting for that extra support to make sure that you're
• 23:27
  achieving your goals, then this is definitely for you.
• 23:30
  This is for the person who is the aspiring leader who is
• 23:33
  either just stepping into leadership or is moving from
• 23:35
  individual contributor to leader.
• 23:38
  And you want to be able to practice being able to have
• 23:40
  direct or difficult conversations, speak up, be
• 23:42
  visible, and network. And be seen as a leader.
• 23:44
  You already are. Then this is the space for you.
• 23:47
  So go ahead and click and take a look at that program.
• 23:50
  And last but not least is speaking engagement.
• 23:53
  So if you are somebody who wants somebody to come in for your
• 23:57
  organization, for your team, for your conference and deliver a
• 24:00
  talk or a workshop that's really going to challenge the status
• 24:03
  quo and help motivate and inspire, then I'm for you.
• 24:07
  So the next step after all of this to go to my website at
• 24:10
  dannytan.com. That's.
• 24:11
  DANITA, n.com. And you can book a call for any
• 24:15
  of these three options. We'll get on the call, we'll
• 24:17
  talk about what it's like to work together and then we'll
• 24:19
  take it from there. So hopefully this.
• 24:22
  Was more than enough. To get you started to take bold.
• 24:26
  And badass action and I. Will see you next week.