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She Had His Baby · The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: This is the Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: with iHeartRadio.
• 0:05
  Speaker 2: Hey guys, welcome to the Almost Famous Podcast. Today is
• 0:08
  Speaker 2: the most exciting episode we've ever had because it is
• 0:11
  Speaker 2: Ben and Jess's baby story. They just got on. It's
• 0:15
  Speaker 2: the first time I've seen Ben for twelve days. But
• 0:16
  Speaker 2: I said, it feels like eternity because there's been so
• 0:18
  Speaker 2: much that has happened in his life since. And I
• 0:22
  Speaker 2: also feel like you guys are celebrities right now because
• 0:25
  Speaker 2: because like it's like, do I even know you anymore?
• 0:29
  Speaker 2: Is there like a whole other perse your tool are people? Okay? Well,
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: birth stories are my absolute favorite. I want every single
• 0:37
  Speaker 2: detail of it. But first, how are you doing well?
• 0:42
  Speaker 3: First of all, I knew that you would want every detail,
• 0:44
  Speaker 3: so I literally journaled timestamps.
• 0:46
  Speaker 4: She did, and we talked about it in the hospital.
• 0:49
  Speaker 4: She goes, It's gonna be so great to talk about
• 0:51
  Speaker 4: this with Ashley because I have everything timestamp Yes.
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: Like why do I love birth stories with so much detail?
• 0:58
  Speaker 3: I think because they're all so different, and like I
• 1:01
  Speaker 3: want to tell mine now like I want everyone else.
• 1:03
  Speaker 3: You know, you get it, right, I totally get it.
• 1:05
  Speaker 3: It Also is just like such a big accomplishment that
• 1:08
  Speaker 3: you like want everyone to know what you've done.
• 1:11
  Speaker 2: I feel like, yeah, I think that there's definitely because
• 1:15
  Speaker 2: there's a uniqueness to every single one.
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  Speaker 3: Yes, exactly what we're doing.
• 1:19
  Speaker 2: Everyone is just like you're right. Everyone is like a
• 1:23
  Speaker 2: rocky story. Well I don't know if I called mine
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: a rocky stores. I was like, it's easy, but okay, ready,
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: let's go.
• 1:32
  Speaker 3: Okay, Well, we checked into the hospital Monday night at
• 1:35
  Speaker 3: seven thirty.
• 1:36
  Speaker 4: Ish, I'll add because we had a plan and the
• 1:43
  Speaker 4: hospital had us at a check in time. We did
• 1:46
  Speaker 4: something I would recommend to every couple that is able
• 1:51
  Speaker 4: that is kind of planning an induction. We went to
• 1:54
  Speaker 4: a great dinner together before we went to the hospital,
• 1:58
  Speaker 4: so so cute. We have like a little date night.
• 2:01
  Speaker 4: And it was weird because I was like, when we
• 2:03
  Speaker 4: leave here, we're pulling up to a hospital to have
• 2:06
  Speaker 4: a baby. So that's how we start our evening.
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: And then yeah, and we checked in Monday, Monday night.
• 2:12
  Speaker 3: Monday night, and I obviously I wasn't in active labor.
• 2:16
  Speaker 3: I was like barely dilated. So their goal overnight was
• 2:19
  Speaker 3: to get me dilated. We knew that she was head
• 2:23
  Speaker 3: down and so I just like got all checked out,
• 2:26
  Speaker 3: and then they started to give me sidotech to get
• 2:29
  Speaker 3: dilated at like eight thirty that night, so I got
• 2:33
  Speaker 3: that every four hours, and I started to have contractions
• 2:36
  Speaker 3: at like nine thirty, but there wasn't any pattern to
• 2:39
  Speaker 3: them or anything like that. So then they kept trying
• 2:43
  Speaker 3: to put like the balloon in to dilate my cervix faster.
• 2:48
  Speaker 2: Did you have the epidurla with the balloon in? No?
• 2:51
  Speaker 4: Why not?
• 2:52
  Speaker 3: I told you. My nurse told me. She was like,
• 2:54
  Speaker 3: you can do it without an epidural, because because I
• 2:57
  Speaker 3: wasn't dilated at all, she was like, if you get up,
• 2:59
  Speaker 3: a girl you like can't get up for who knows
• 3:02
  Speaker 3: how long. And I'm actually glad I didn't because I
• 3:05
  Speaker 3: end up laboring for thirty six hours. So I was
• 3:08
  Speaker 3: happy to be able to get up and stuff.
• 3:10
  Speaker 4: Okay, I'm just this is not my story obviously, so
• 3:14
  Speaker 4: I'm just going to chime in with my thoughts a
• 3:16
  Speaker 4: little bit during this.
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: Please, Yeah, we need the chime in.
• 3:19
  Speaker 4: Yeah, We're gonna put a balloon in to help the dilation.
• 3:22
  Speaker 4: I'm like, Oh, that doesn't sound that aggressive. Okay, just
• 3:26
  Speaker 4: remember that thought. Just remember that thought, as she continues.
• 3:31
  Speaker 3: So they try to put it in at twelve am,
• 3:34
  Speaker 3: and I wasn't ready for it, but I did get
• 3:38
  Speaker 3: pain management in my IV throughout. I wasn't like totally
• 3:41
  Speaker 3: toughing it out because it was really aggressive. And then
• 3:44
  Speaker 3: they tried to get at one forty five, but I
• 3:46
  Speaker 3: still wasn't dilated. And then at four am they were
• 3:50
  Speaker 3: finally able to get it in. So I'd had like
• 3:54
  Speaker 3: three doses of the side attech by then, So we've
• 3:58
  Speaker 3: got the balloon in.
• 3:59
  Speaker 2: How many centimeters were you?
• 4:01
  Speaker 3: I was only one to get the Holy moly, girl,
• 4:04
  Speaker 3: I know. So then I got another side of TECK
• 4:07
  Speaker 3: at eight fifteen to get even more dilated. And then
• 4:11
  Speaker 3: at like around ten am, they tried to get the
• 4:13
  Speaker 3: balloon out because it had been in there for six
• 4:15
  Speaker 3: hours and it wasn't ready. And then they tried to
• 4:20
  Speaker 3: get at one forty five and they only got half
• 4:22
  Speaker 3: of it out, so then I still had like another
• 4:25
  Speaker 3: half in because it makes like a sandwich around your cervix,
• 4:28
  Speaker 3: so the other half was still in and so we
• 4:31
  Speaker 3: were basically just like waiting all day.
• 4:32
  Speaker 2: What did it feel like?
• 4:34
  Speaker 3: Just like a lot of pressure, okay, And like I
• 4:37
  Speaker 3: was still getting up and going to the bathroom and stuff,
• 4:39
  Speaker 3: and it just felt like it just felt yeah, pressure
• 4:43
  Speaker 3: and like there was something stuck up my body, which
• 4:45
  Speaker 3: there was.
• 4:47
  Speaker 2: Did you feel like with the contractions intense at this point?
• 4:51
  Speaker 3: They weren't. It was more like cramping contractions. It wasn't
• 4:54
  Speaker 3: like active, active labor. Okay, it really wasn't that bad.
• 4:58
  Speaker 3: We were just sitting around.
• 5:00
  Speaker 4: I know why you're asking me. I have no idea
• 5:02
  Speaker 4: you were in time.
• 5:04
  Speaker 2: I see the same thing.
• 5:05
  Speaker 3: I know.
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: I'm like, it wasn't that bad, right, yeah, or like
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: that part was bad, right.
• 5:11
  Speaker 3: Such a blur. But then at four they got the
• 5:15
  Speaker 3: balloon out and I was four cin ameters dilated and
• 5:18
  Speaker 3: they could feel her head, and then at four point
• 5:21
  Speaker 3: thirty I started to have like the craziest contraction. So
• 5:24
  Speaker 3: four thirty PM on Tuesday.
• 5:27
  Speaker 2: Right, so you are already like been in bed for
• 5:32
  Speaker 2: almost two full days.
• 5:33
  Speaker 3: Now almost one? Yeah, one full day?
• 5:36
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah it was Monday, Okay, so never Tuesday at
• 5:39
  Speaker 2: a pm? Okay, yeah, yes almost for us.
• 5:40
  Speaker 3: Yeah, So that Tuesday afternoon, we were just like sitting
• 5:45
  Speaker 3: talking to my parents, and all of a sudden I
• 5:46
  Speaker 3: was getting like the worst pain in contractions, ever, and
• 5:51
  Speaker 3: so we called in the nurse to get my epidural started.
• 5:55
  Speaker 3: And so that's this is where the action happens. It's
• 5:56
  Speaker 3: been kind of bowing up to this point.
• 5:58
  Speaker 2: Okay, okay, because is Ben's caption. I wasn't sure if
• 6:02
  Speaker 2: it was all about just the birth of his daughter
• 6:07
  Speaker 2: being like the craziest adventure, or whether there was an
• 6:10
  Speaker 2: adventure to the birth.
• 6:12
  Speaker 4: There was an adventure, I'd say, no matter what, Like
• 6:15
  Speaker 4: now that we've gone through it and I saw, just
• 6:18
  Speaker 4: do it, no matter how good or bad it goes,
• 6:22
  Speaker 4: it is an adventure. It is the wildest thing I've
• 6:25
  Speaker 4: ever been a part of, from start to finish. The
• 6:29
  Speaker 4: balloon getting removed even to this day, like seeing Waynna
• 6:37
  Speaker 4: come out was wild? Was it full frontal or above?
• 6:41
  Speaker 4: I did both?
• 6:43
  Speaker 2: Oh, you did both?
• 6:44
  Speaker 4: Okay, But the balloon part was like when it got removed,
• 6:47
  Speaker 4: I was like, you are a like I don't know
• 6:50
  Speaker 4: how a human being is doing what you're doing because
• 6:53
  Speaker 4: it was so much bigger than I expected it to be.
• 6:56
  Speaker 2: God, And it was like was it like a baby's head?
• 7:00
  Speaker 4: Yeah, one hundred percent, and it like I don't I
• 7:04
  Speaker 4: still don't get it, Like I I meant it when
• 7:06
  Speaker 4: I said I don't have words, because like it's the
• 7:08
  Speaker 4: whole thing was just me probably like standing there like
• 7:12
  Speaker 4: I don't understand, and she was just was And I
• 7:16
  Speaker 4: don't think this is like even a compliment because I
• 7:19
  Speaker 4: don't think it's necessary. She was so tough, like there
• 7:22
  Speaker 4: was very little like screaming like crying, like it was
• 7:28
  Speaker 4: just like she was in it, like this was like
• 7:30
  Speaker 4: a this was game day and she was full on
• 7:33
  Speaker 4: like I'm going to make this thing happen. Yeah, and
• 7:36
  Speaker 4: I was watching it like in pain, like my for myself.
• 7:39
  Speaker 4: So okay, she can now go to where.
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  Speaker 2: Like because I need to know what the epidural was
• 7:44
  Speaker 2: in When they took out the balloon.
• 7:46
  Speaker 3: No, and I didn't realize. I didn't realize that it
• 7:51
  Speaker 3: should have been no one like really because they came
• 7:54
  Speaker 3: in and they were like, okay, you're definitely ready to
• 7:56
  Speaker 3: get the balloon out, like I'm just gonna do it.
• 7:58
  Speaker 3: Are you good? And I was like yeah, like I
• 8:00
  Speaker 3: didn't think it was going to be anything. And then
• 8:02
  Speaker 3: my nurse on the shift change was like, you didn't
• 8:05
  Speaker 3: get your epidural for the balloon coming out? I was
• 8:07
  Speaker 3: like no, but it was fine.
• 8:09
  Speaker 2: It was very brief because it was just like whoa, yeah,
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  Speaker 2: it just.
• 8:13
  Speaker 3: Popped right out.
• 8:14
  Speaker 4: No, yeah, okay, okay.
• 8:17
  Speaker 3: So then I get the epidural and this is at
• 8:22
  Speaker 3: five PM, and the epidural goes in like totally fine.
• 8:26
  Speaker 3: I like I had a great anesthesiologist. It didn't hurt
• 8:30
  Speaker 3: like I thought it would.
• 8:32
  Speaker 2: I told you. I was like, why, I'm no offense
• 8:35
  Speaker 2: to people who have fears of needles, but you're not
• 8:38
  Speaker 2: looking at it.
• 8:39
  Speaker 3: No, I was.
• 8:40
  Speaker 2: I right when I said, it hurts just as much
• 8:42
  Speaker 2: as maybe a botox prick in your forehead, yes.
• 8:45
  Speaker 3: Or like a beasting like something like that. Like it's
• 8:48
  Speaker 3: really nothing so wild and quick, yes, so quick. But
• 8:52
  Speaker 3: the problem was I had a huge blood pressure drop.
• 8:55
  Speaker 3: Like I got it in and then all of a sudden,
• 8:58
  Speaker 3: Ben said, I turned like really really white, and I
• 9:01
  Speaker 3: looked at the mcg all just know. I was like yeah,
• 9:04
  Speaker 3: I was like, I'm super lightheaded, and I like thought
• 9:07
  Speaker 3: I was going to pass out. And then her blood
• 9:09
  Speaker 3: pressure dropped and so we lost her heartbeat for like
• 9:13
  Speaker 3: ten minutes. So they like, yeah, they flipped me on
• 9:16
  Speaker 3: all fours, So I'm on all fours in my hospital
• 9:19
  Speaker 3: gown and like ten doctors come rushing in. It turns
• 9:22
  Speaker 3: out this is like very common and not like as
• 9:24
  Speaker 3: big of it of an emergency as we thought it was.
• 9:27
  Speaker 3: But it was scary.
• 9:28
  Speaker 2: I think you getting on all fours and like your
• 9:30
  Speaker 2: blood pressure going down sounds normal. Her them not being
• 9:33
  Speaker 2: able to find a heartbeat on her for ten minutes, yeah,
• 9:35
  Speaker 2: oh wow.
• 9:36
  Speaker 3: They were getting ready to roll me back for a
• 9:38
  Speaker 3: C section.
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 9:39
  Speaker 4: Yeah. So they had like a small like her like
• 9:43
  Speaker 4: Whinnie's heart rate dropped like they could still find it,
• 9:47
  Speaker 4: but it was like severely low. And it was this
• 9:52
  Speaker 4: I think this is like a typical dad moment in
• 9:55
  Speaker 4: the hospital. So like I when we first just got
• 10:00
  Speaker 4: to the hospital, the nurse's head like kind of like
• 10:03
  Speaker 4: we were talking to them and they're like, you know,
• 10:04
  Speaker 4: I was like, what is a dad's strategy during this
• 10:07
  Speaker 4: whole like process, And they said, you know, we see
• 10:10
  Speaker 4: it all. We see dads come in rolling their Xbox,
• 10:14
  Speaker 4: hook it up through the TV, put their headphones in
• 10:16
  Speaker 4: and the nerd kid and never pay attention for like
• 10:19
  Speaker 4: the whole time. And I'm like, well that's that's a
• 10:22
  Speaker 4: little bunch. And then they're like and then we have
• 10:25
  Speaker 4: dads that are like hovering like always like up in
• 10:27
  Speaker 4: our business, like never leaving the bedside like and they're
• 10:32
  Speaker 4: like that just makes work hard. And so like I
• 10:35
  Speaker 4: in my mind was like, okay, I need to be present,
• 10:37
  Speaker 4: but not hovering. I want to be present, but I
• 10:43
  Speaker 4: don't want to like be standing at just A's bedside
• 10:45
  Speaker 4: the whole time because these people know what they're doing.
• 10:47
  Speaker 4: So the epidural goes in and I was sitting in
• 10:50
  Speaker 4: front of Jess like just kind of like that's what
• 10:52
  Speaker 4: they tell you to do, yeah, like hanging out.
• 10:55
  Speaker 2: With her, hold her hands.
• 10:56
  Speaker 4: Yeah, and it was done, and everybody's okay, everything's good
• 10:59
  Speaker 4: and just like just give a few minutes. So she
• 11:02
  Speaker 4: lays back in bed and then like some other nurses
• 11:05
  Speaker 4: come in and like start like doing some stuff with her.
• 11:07
  Speaker 4: So I get up and I walk over to my
• 11:09
  Speaker 4: sofa bed and Indiana Basketball was about to come in,
• 11:14
  Speaker 4: so I start logging into my peacock account and on
• 11:17
  Speaker 4: my iPad and I look up and all of a sudden,
• 11:20
  Speaker 4: like there's ten doctors in the room, and so I
• 11:23
  Speaker 4: remember just looking around like I don't understand what's happening.
• 11:27
  Speaker 4: And a nurse comes over and sits by me and
• 11:28
  Speaker 4: she's like, this is very normal, but like you should
• 11:32
  Speaker 4: prepare to get rolled back into like the or. I'm like,
• 11:36
  Speaker 4: what what do you mean? Like this is normal and
• 11:39
  Speaker 4: we're going to the or. So by the time it
• 11:41
  Speaker 4: happened and it was done, I was just kind of
• 11:45
  Speaker 4: like not processing it. That was kind of a theme
• 11:48
  Speaker 4: for me. I think for the to those two days
• 11:50
  Speaker 4: is like I was slow to process exactly what was
• 11:53
  Speaker 4: happening when it was happening.
• 11:56
  Speaker 3: Okay, But all the nurses said that Ben should teach
• 11:58
  Speaker 3: a lesson to h Bins on how to be in
• 12:01
  Speaker 3: the delivery room because he was so awesome, Like he
• 12:05
  Speaker 3: was the perfect support. That's perfect, I'll imagine. Yeah, I know,
• 12:09
  Speaker 3: no surprise, but it was the best. But once my
• 12:13
  Speaker 3: epidural was in and like I was good, they broke
• 12:16
  Speaker 3: my water. Yeah, and I was ninety percent.
• 12:19
  Speaker 2: Like she just like like the heart rate just went
• 12:21
  Speaker 2: back up after you like change positions.
• 12:23
  Speaker 3: Yes, so changed positions. She was fine obviously, yeah, and
• 12:29
  Speaker 3: I was okay too. I was just like a little
• 12:31
  Speaker 3: shaken up. Yeah, but they just like went for it.
• 12:35
  Speaker 4: After that, It's it's a uh I mean, I'm sure
• 12:38
  Speaker 4: people are going to listen to this and be like, oh, yeah,
• 12:40
  Speaker 4: that happened to me, or I know somebody happened to
• 12:42
  Speaker 4: It's a like almost like tortuous experience because at this
• 12:47
  Speaker 4: point Jessica I had now seen probably an hour before
• 12:51
  Speaker 4: that like her mother bear coming out like all of
• 12:54
  Speaker 4: a sudden, like her mentality changed her, like the way
• 12:58
  Speaker 4: she was going through it changed, like she is she
• 13:00
  Speaker 4: was becoming a mom in front, like in front.
• 13:03
  Speaker 3: Of my eyes.
• 13:04
  Speaker 4: And so this like blood pressure drop happens, and all
• 13:09
  Speaker 4: of a sudden, like I said, it happens so fast
• 13:11
  Speaker 4: that like it kind of feels like an emergency. Probably
• 13:14
  Speaker 4: is considered an emergency. So Jessica's on all fours and
• 13:18
  Speaker 4: she's wondering what is happening. I don't feel good. My
• 13:21
  Speaker 4: blood pressure is low. And they're starting to talk like
• 13:24
  Speaker 4: hey Whennie's blood pressure is low? And then so like
• 13:28
  Speaker 4: jess starts getting anxious, right like is she okay? She
• 13:31
  Speaker 4: starts asking like is whinny okay? Is whinny okay? Is
• 13:33
  Speaker 4: whinny okay? Yeah?
• 13:34
  Speaker 2: Are you just like we like you're are you just
• 13:36
  Speaker 2: like oh maybe I just want to get the sea
• 13:38
  Speaker 2: sections just so I don't have to worry.
• 13:39
  Speaker 3: Yes. I looked at them and I was like, whatever
• 13:41
  Speaker 3: it takes to get her out healthy, like do it.
• 13:43
  Speaker 3: Like I looked at my nurse and said that, and
• 13:45
  Speaker 3: she was like noted.
• 13:46
  Speaker 4: And and then to get this problem fixed, they give
• 13:52
  Speaker 4: you a medication to speed up your heart rate. So
• 13:55
  Speaker 4: you're anxious about your like baby and her health, like
• 14:00
  Speaker 4: you're freaking out, you're scared for the baby. And then
• 14:03
  Speaker 4: they give you this medication to speed up your heart rate.
• 14:07
  Speaker 4: So then you get more anxious. And now I'm anxious
• 14:10
  Speaker 4: because Jess is like medically anxious. She's already anxious, but
• 14:13
  Speaker 4: now she's like hyper anxious and like scared. So this
• 14:17
  Speaker 4: whole thing feels like a whirlwind. And then it's done
• 14:19
  Speaker 4: and everybody leaves and you're just it's just like the
• 14:22
  Speaker 4: three of you, you, your nurse, the two of us
• 14:25
  Speaker 4: in the nurse in the room again and it's like quiet,
• 14:27
  Speaker 4: and you're like, what just happened?
• 14:29
  Speaker 2: That's so funny. So my dad had you know, he's
• 14:31
  Speaker 2: anantasysiologist forre you guys listening, and he has not worked
• 14:36
  Speaker 2: on the Once you get to a certain like point
• 14:37
  Speaker 2: in your career, you can kind of decide what kind
• 14:39
  Speaker 2: of cases you want to take. And he hasn't been
• 14:42
  Speaker 2: on the Obie floor and at least a decade, I
• 14:45
  Speaker 2: would say, like fifteen years, because he says it's the
• 14:48
  Speaker 2: most unpredictable place in the entire hospital, and it makes
• 14:51
  Speaker 2: him so nervous because every case is just he did
• 14:54
  Speaker 2: never know what to expect, and they turn so quickly.
• 14:57
  Speaker 3: Oh I totally yeah one, and like anything good I
• 15:00
  Speaker 3: could have, anyone could be rolled back at any time,
• 15:04
  Speaker 3: you know, like you just have no idea because it's
• 15:06
  Speaker 3: up to the baby.
• 15:07
  Speaker 2: And this is when you think, like how in the
• 15:10
  Speaker 2: world did we deliver children over one hundred years ago?
• 15:15
  Speaker 2: Like how did not even one hundred years ago, but
• 15:17
  Speaker 2: like seventy years ago, Like how was this a thing?
• 15:21
  Speaker 2: How are we so lucky to live in this like
• 15:24
  Speaker 2: seventy year period of this world? Because if you needed
• 15:28
  Speaker 2: to see section back in the eighteen hundreds, eh no,
• 15:32
  Speaker 2: I know, we.
• 15:33
  Speaker 3: Talked about that so much with their nurse, like what
• 15:35
  Speaker 3: did you do?
• 15:37
  Speaker 2: I don't know, crazy, so wild? Okay, so now you're
• 15:51
  Speaker 2: chill and you got your epidural, they broke your water
• 15:54
  Speaker 2: you barely felt that.
• 15:55
  Speaker 3: Yeah, and then nothing.
• 15:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and so now you're just chilling waiting to dilate more.
• 16:01
  Speaker 3: Yes, I have the potocin drift the whole time too,
• 16:03
  Speaker 3: so I'm like having contractions. I was having contractions every
• 16:07
  Speaker 3: two minutes for like ten hours.
• 16:10
  Speaker 2: And you had no idea, no idea.
• 16:12
  Speaker 3: Yeah, but at like what time was it? At ten pm,
• 16:17
  Speaker 3: my nurse came in and did like a circuit where
• 16:20
  Speaker 3: she changed my positions, like the mile circuit, so you
• 16:24
  Speaker 3: changed positions, and she was like massaging my pelvis and
• 16:27
  Speaker 3: just like getting baby to like move down into my
• 16:29
  Speaker 3: pelvis more. And so we did that for like an hour,
• 16:33
  Speaker 3: and then I fell asleep and then they checked my
• 16:36
  Speaker 3: dilation at eleven and or no, they checked my dilation
• 16:40
  Speaker 3: at eleven and I was seven centimeters dilated and the
• 16:43
  Speaker 3: nurse could see Winnie's hair, which is crazy. And then
• 16:48
  Speaker 3: I fell asleep for an hour and a half, and
• 16:49
  Speaker 3: at twelve thirty am on Wednesday, I was ten centimeters
• 16:53
  Speaker 3: dilated and so we were ready to push.
• 16:57
  Speaker 2: And when they said okay, we're ready to push, what
• 16:59
  Speaker 2: were your feelings?
• 17:01
  Speaker 3: I was so excited because we've been there for so long,
• 17:05
  Speaker 3: just like waiting and like I was being poked and
• 17:08
  Speaker 3: prodded and like I'm just so excited. But Ben was
• 17:12
  Speaker 3: fast asleep, so the nurse had to wake him up
• 17:14
  Speaker 3: and woke him up and it was like it's time
• 17:15
  Speaker 3: to push. And then it was like.
• 17:19
  Speaker 2: It's so crazy.
• 17:21
  Speaker 4: When I went to sleep, she was four centimeters they'd
• 17:24
  Speaker 4: just broken her water and so they're like, hey, if
• 17:28
  Speaker 4: you want to like get some sleep, now's your time.
• 17:32
  Speaker 4: And I was like when is this, Like when do
• 17:33
  Speaker 4: you think this could happen. They're like it will happen
• 17:35
  Speaker 4: like early morning, Like, yeah, I'm gonna go to sleep,
• 17:38
  Speaker 4: like if everything's good. She's like, looks like take a nap.
• 17:44
  Speaker 4: And so when they woke me up, to're like all right,
• 17:46
  Speaker 4: then it's time to push. I I'll never forget that
• 17:50
  Speaker 4: feeling of like, oh, it's now happening, like we are.
• 17:54
  Speaker 4: And I looked at Jess and she has like this
• 17:56
  Speaker 4: smile and happy tears and she's like are you ready?
• 18:00
  Speaker 4: And I'm like I'm ready, and we just are like
• 18:04
  Speaker 4: I guess we're gonna go through this until we have
• 18:08
  Speaker 4: a baby.
• 18:09
  Speaker 2: Yeah. It's so weird because it's like so crazy for us.
• 18:11
  Speaker 2: And then the nurses are like we do this multiple
• 18:14
  Speaker 2: times a day.
• 18:15
  Speaker 4: Yeah, and it's time.
• 18:16
  Speaker 2: Let's just it's time.
• 18:17
  Speaker 3: Let's do it.
• 18:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 18:18
  Speaker 3: She was like are you ready to you want to
• 18:19
  Speaker 3: do it now?
• 18:20
  Speaker 2: I was like yeah.
• 18:21
  Speaker 4: Like so, Jess and I kind of had a birth
• 18:25
  Speaker 4: plan tentatively where I was going to DJ, like I
• 18:30
  Speaker 4: brought a speaker to DJ pushing part, and so there
• 18:36
  Speaker 4: was like a like Jess would like go through and
• 18:39
  Speaker 4: push and then rest and she'd be like, all right,
• 18:41
  Speaker 4: new song, next song, A little I want a little faster,
• 18:44
  Speaker 4: a little slower, because I start out with like some
• 18:47
  Speaker 4: like real slow, Like I have this playlist on Spotify
• 18:50
  Speaker 4: that I made for Jess that we like that she
• 18:53
  Speaker 4: can listen to anytime she wants to add songs to
• 18:55
  Speaker 4: and so, but it's like lovey and slow, and so
• 18:58
  Speaker 4: I started playing that. I was like this is be
• 19:00
  Speaker 4: sweet and she's like, no, we got to speed this up.
• 19:02
  Speaker 4: Let's get nineties like pop. And I'm like, okay, nineties pop.
• 19:05
  Speaker 4: So in sync comes on. That works for a little bit,
• 19:08
  Speaker 4: and then we move into like what's going to make
• 19:10
  Speaker 4: people dance on tables? And I'm like, all right, that playlist,
• 19:13
  Speaker 4: let me type that in.
• 19:15
  Speaker 3: It's my favorite playlist on Spotify. It's like making dunk
• 19:19
  Speaker 3: people dance on tables or something like that. It's so good.
• 19:22
  Speaker 3: But I was it was the middle of the night.
• 19:25
  Speaker 3: I started pushing at one thirty, so I was like
• 19:28
  Speaker 3: falling asleep in between contractions. So I had to have.
• 19:30
  Speaker 2: Like you had been awake for how long, like two days?
• 19:34
  Speaker 3: I hadn't slept hardly. I had taken like two two
• 19:37
  Speaker 3: hour naps maybe.
• 19:38
  Speaker 2: And then what about eating?
• 19:41
  Speaker 3: I hadn't eaten in a long time.
• 19:44
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you ate.
• 19:44
  Speaker 4: Right, you had a casadia.
• 19:46
  Speaker 3: You have a before my epidural.
• 19:49
  Speaker 2: Oh that was the it had been quite some time.
• 19:51
  Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, it had been a while. So anyways, been DJ.
• 19:58
  Speaker 3: I pushed for an hour and a half foremost and
• 20:03
  Speaker 3: she came out to Rihanna singing, please don't stop the
• 20:06
  Speaker 3: music yep, and all the nurses were laughing because she
• 20:09
  Speaker 3: was like wiggling her head.
• 20:11
  Speaker 4: You could see her like coming out and she was
• 20:13
  Speaker 4: just going like this, no, and then there's like what
• 20:16
  Speaker 4: is she doing? And she was just like wiggling her
• 20:19
  Speaker 4: head back and forth.
• 20:20
  Speaker 2: That's hilarious. I love that.
• 20:23
  Speaker 4: Yeah, and then we I don't know how good of
• 20:27
  Speaker 4: a view you'll have, but.
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: We've got a great view.
• 20:29
  Speaker 4: Winnie came out at what two point fifty two three
• 20:33
  Speaker 4: am at seven pounds three ounces, twenty inches long.
• 20:39
  Speaker 2: Amazing, so beautiful and so wonderful. And how was your feeling?
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: I feel like both of you guys, you saw heaven.
• 20:47
  Speaker 3: Honestly, yes, the nurses told us that it was like
• 20:50
  Speaker 3: their favorite post birth moment they've had, because both of
• 20:53
  Speaker 3: us were just like happy, tears excited, couldn't believe it,
• 20:57
  Speaker 3: like honestly breathless. She came out and like, obviously we're biased,
• 21:02
  Speaker 3: but she has a really really cute face and I
• 21:05
  Speaker 3: couldn't believe that that was her face.
• 21:07
  Speaker 2: And you were so excited to see her face.
• 21:09
  Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, I was so excited to see her
• 21:11
  Speaker 3: face and she like her lips were all swollen and
• 21:13
  Speaker 3: she just looked like the perfect little baby was the best.
• 21:18
  Speaker 2: It was about to cry.
• 21:20
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it was crazy. Well, the nurse was really sweet
• 21:23
  Speaker 4: to me too, because I was more like interested that
• 21:29
  Speaker 4: I thought I would be, Like we talked about this
• 21:31
  Speaker 4: right before, right before. It's funny how things change, Like
• 21:34
  Speaker 4: I was more intrigued with what was going on once
• 21:39
  Speaker 4: it felt like things were going well, and so the
• 21:42
  Speaker 4: nurse would like clean Jess up. In between like pushing moments,
• 21:46
  Speaker 4: and then she'd be like, Ben, you want to come look,
• 21:48
  Speaker 4: and so like she was really sweet and like to
• 21:51
  Speaker 4: Jess and I both like where I you know, she
• 21:53
  Speaker 4: would clean her up, we'd get all reset, and then
• 21:55
  Speaker 4: she'd be like you should come look, and so like
• 21:57
  Speaker 4: I got to see the top of Oney's head, which
• 22:00
  Speaker 4: was insane to see. And then like as when he
• 22:06
  Speaker 4: got to come out, but like once she's ready to
• 22:09
  Speaker 4: come out, like it happens so fast, like they don't
• 22:12
  Speaker 4: tell you, like this is going to be the last one.
• 22:15
  Speaker 4: They're like, you're getting close, Jess, and then all of
• 22:17
  Speaker 4: a sudden there's a baby like wailing and they're holding
• 22:21
  Speaker 4: her up, and then they just gave her to Jess
• 22:23
  Speaker 4: and like they did this like when he was wailing,
• 22:28
  Speaker 4: and as soon as they laid Winny on Jess's chest,
• 22:32
  Speaker 4: she stopped and the two of them just like laid
• 22:35
  Speaker 4: there together for an hour and which was incredibly sweet,
• 22:42
  Speaker 4: and so you know, they got justs like cleaned up
• 22:47
  Speaker 4: and like probably I'll like my favorite moment though, was
• 22:51
  Speaker 4: everybody leaves then once like the cord's cut and like
• 22:55
  Speaker 4: Jess is like cleaned up and everything's like.
• 22:57
  Speaker 2: The cord cutting was nothing right but nothing.
• 23:00
  Speaker 4: It is tough. It's like thinker than I thought I was.
• 23:05
  Speaker 4: But then it was just Winnie, jess and I in
• 23:08
  Speaker 4: the room, and I like I think jess and I
• 23:12
  Speaker 4: both had this like massive letdown, Like I didn't realize
• 23:15
  Speaker 4: how like stressed I was about the whole situation. And
• 23:18
  Speaker 4: then obviously Jessica just gave birth. So as soon as
• 23:21
  Speaker 4: everything was good and when he was safe and everything
• 23:24
  Speaker 4: had been done and the room was quiet, like we
• 23:27
  Speaker 4: both just like took this deep breath and we turned
• 23:31
  Speaker 4: on some worship music, like real soft worship music, and
• 23:34
  Speaker 4: we all three fell asleep like for a good hour
• 23:39
  Speaker 4: and a half, just like as a family, which was
• 23:44
  Speaker 4: like so like it was like a beautifully magical moment
• 23:48
  Speaker 4: because I think everybody was so tired and like now
• 23:53
  Speaker 4: we were going to start this journey is a family together.
• 24:01
  Speaker 3: It was really special. It was like a long waiting
• 24:04
  Speaker 3: process I feel like my labor was. But it was
• 24:09
  Speaker 3: so good.
• 24:11
  Speaker 4: Then, Jessica says, when we woke up from the nap,
• 24:14
  Speaker 4: she was holding winning and I was like, how you
• 24:16
  Speaker 4: do and She's like, I do it again right now
• 24:18
  Speaker 4: for her, Like I would go all through this again.
• 24:21
  Speaker 4: And I was like, that's insane because I assuming you will.
• 24:26
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I assuming God it is the plan. Yeah, but
• 24:30
  Speaker 3: I would have like I would have labored for however
• 24:33
  Speaker 3: long I needed to to have her. She's like the
• 24:35
  Speaker 3: most perfect thing, and she's such a good baby and
• 24:39
  Speaker 3: she's a week old today, so we're settled in as
• 24:43
  Speaker 3: a family and it's just been like the best thing ever.
• 24:46
  Speaker 2: So sweet. Guys. So when when you were like that
• 24:50
  Speaker 2: whole last about like you felt good right, like you
• 24:54
  Speaker 2: weren't you were comfortable?
• 24:57
  Speaker 3: Yes, I mean it's crazy if you get n up
• 24:59
  Speaker 3: dar all, Like, it's not painful, it's just the pressure.
• 25:04
  Speaker 3: So like, especially when she was about to come out,
• 25:06
  Speaker 3: I was like I have to keep pushing because the
• 25:08
  Speaker 3: pressure is like so intense. But it wasn't like painful.
• 25:11
  Speaker 3: And then they sit you up when you still have
• 25:13
  Speaker 3: your epidural too, so it was awesome.
• 25:15
  Speaker 2: M totally. And then how was how did your body feel?
• 25:20
  Speaker 2: I think like immediately you're just like relieved. You don't
• 25:23
  Speaker 2: like you actually like don't even like feel your body
• 25:26
  Speaker 2: Like is that kind of a weird description of it.
• 25:28
  Speaker 3: No, that's like a perfect description.
• 25:29
  Speaker 4: It's I mean.
• 25:30
  Speaker 2: Also probably because we have the epidurals. Yes, but no
• 25:35
  Speaker 2: baby coming out anymore. And then afterward, you know, it
• 25:39
  Speaker 2: kind of hits next morning. How did how are you
• 25:43
  Speaker 2: feeling physically right now?
• 25:44
  Speaker 3: Well, I had three tears, all in different places. In
• 25:48
  Speaker 3: one of them, I mean, is it Teami.
• 25:51
  Speaker 2: No, it's not team I tell us all because I
• 25:53
  Speaker 2: couldn't walk for like three to four weeks after Dawson.
• 25:56
  Speaker 2: But after Hayden, I danced the next day. It was weird.
• 25:59
  Speaker 3: It's insane, but yeah, the nurses said that the second baby,
• 26:03
  Speaker 3: they call it a stop and drop when the when
• 26:05
  Speaker 3: people are in labor, it's like so fast and easy.
• 26:09
  Speaker 2: It was so it was crazy. The second one was
• 26:11
  Speaker 2: so crazy. I just couldn't believe. I was like, it's
• 26:13
  Speaker 2: going to hit me right when I'm dancing in the
• 26:15
  Speaker 2: kitchen the day after, and it never really hit. It
• 26:18
  Speaker 2: was weird, but guess because you tear so much less
• 26:20
  Speaker 2: the second time. Anyway, How was how was the tear?
• 26:22
  Speaker 3: Well, I had a second degree tear and then I
• 26:24
  Speaker 3: had a tear on my urethra, which is like really tough.
• 26:30
  Speaker 3: So I had a catheter for another twenty four hours
• 26:32
  Speaker 3: in the hospital, and that one hurt really that tears.
• 26:37
  Speaker 3: It's still a little tough. I'm sitting on my like
• 26:39
  Speaker 3: inflatable doughnut right now. Yeah, but overall, I feel better
• 26:43
  Speaker 3: than I thought I would. I thought I would feel
• 26:45
  Speaker 3: like I kind of got like hit by a car,
• 26:47
  Speaker 3: But yeah, it hasn't been that bad.
• 26:49
  Speaker 2: Good.
• 26:50
  Speaker 4: The crazy thing to me is, I don't know if
• 26:52
  Speaker 4: this is like a thing, but as so, like the
• 26:55
  Speaker 4: pushing part is incredible, and it because of the time
• 27:00
  Speaker 4: of day and because of how long it was, like
• 27:02
  Speaker 4: Jess would kind of fall asleep in between pushing because
• 27:06
  Speaker 4: she was so tired and she was working so hard
• 27:09
  Speaker 4: at it. But as like when he moved down, like
• 27:15
  Speaker 4: just the amount of like justice belly was like diappringing,
• 27:18
  Speaker 4: like in the midst of the pushing, Jess and I
• 27:21
  Speaker 4: looked at her belly and we're like, you have a
• 27:22
  Speaker 4: belly button again. It's so weird to that or they
• 27:26
  Speaker 4: just yeah it like it was that was crazy to me. Yeah,
• 27:31
  Speaker 4: I don't know, like that that part was wild, just
• 27:33
  Speaker 4: how quickly the belly like started to go away. And
• 27:37
  Speaker 4: now it's crazy to me that I kind of like
• 27:40
  Speaker 4: right now, like her parents are out here that week
• 27:44
  Speaker 4: my parents are out here right now and we're doing
• 27:46
  Speaker 4: some work on the house. So like the mornings and
• 27:49
  Speaker 4: the evenings are my time with Winnie. And during the
• 27:53
  Speaker 4: day like she just kind of gets passed around and
• 27:55
  Speaker 4: then Jess like takes her for a long time and everything.
• 27:58
  Speaker 4: But when he will lay on my chest and her
• 28:00
  Speaker 4: head will be like on my shoulder and her feet
• 28:04
  Speaker 4: will be like at my groin, and every time, like
• 28:09
  Speaker 4: I'm like, how did you fit fit in my like
• 28:13
  Speaker 4: in my wife, like just as a foot shorter than me,
• 28:19
  Speaker 4: and like somehow you were in there and it doesn't
• 28:23
  Speaker 4: like that doesn't like the anatomia, that doesn't make sense.
• 28:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so tell me about the day after, because that's
• 28:40
  Speaker 2: a day you know, the hospital has a schedule for you.
• 28:44
  Speaker 2: Then you have the newborn shoot, and then the nurses
• 28:47
  Speaker 2: are waking you up every hour to go pee or
• 28:50
  Speaker 2: every twenty minutes.
• 28:51
  Speaker 3: It was insane. Yeah, I really felt like every twenty
• 28:55
  Speaker 3: minutes someone was in there like doing something to me
• 28:57
  Speaker 3: or to Winny. And because I tour where I did,
• 29:02
  Speaker 3: like they had to check my catheter bag and they
• 29:04
  Speaker 3: had to like then they would do the fundel massage
• 29:07
  Speaker 3: and like see how my bleeding was and then they
• 29:09
  Speaker 3: would check on Winnie and it was like the craziest
• 29:12
  Speaker 3: day ever. So we had the option to spend a
• 29:14
  Speaker 3: second night, like for recovery, so I took that. So
• 29:18
  Speaker 3: I spent the night Thursday night too, just to like
• 29:21
  Speaker 3: be able to try and sleep a little bit. And
• 29:24
  Speaker 3: it was nice because I kept you have so many questions,
• 29:27
  Speaker 3: like because I decided to breastfeed, and that's really hard
• 29:32
  Speaker 3: too because you don't have your milk yet, and so
• 29:35
  Speaker 3: like having people there to support was really helpful. But
• 29:37
  Speaker 3: those two days in the hospital felt like the biggest
• 29:39
  Speaker 3: whirlwind because you're getting so much info. You're like figuring
• 29:43
  Speaker 3: out your body and like how to handle that, and there's.
• 29:47
  Speaker 2: Just feels like a business day kind of Yes, I'm
• 29:49
  Speaker 2: like I have.
• 29:50
  Speaker 3: So many meetings today, this is crazy.
• 29:52
  Speaker 2: You know you have some forms to fill out. Yeah,
• 29:56
  Speaker 2: it was wild, including the birth certificate. So how did
• 30:00
  Speaker 2: you guys come up with the name Winnie? Winnie Higgins
• 30:02
  Speaker 2: tell us about when you came up with this name.
• 30:03
  Speaker 2: I know you had it for a while, but you
• 30:05
  Speaker 2: didn't I didn't tell us.
• 30:07
  Speaker 4: We have a list of boy names that are pretty extensive,
• 30:11
  Speaker 4: and that has been hard for us to narrow down
• 30:13
  Speaker 4: because we like so many and like, as soon as
• 30:19
  Speaker 4: just found out she was pregnant, she started like doing
• 30:23
  Speaker 4: the like notes on her phone with the names that
• 30:26
  Speaker 4: we would hear, and girl names were really hard for us.
• 30:31
  Speaker 4: There wasn't many we agreed upon. And then there was
• 30:34
  Speaker 4: a moment where we were sitting on the couch in
• 30:38
  Speaker 4: our living room kind of like going through names. And
• 30:43
  Speaker 4: I don't exactly remember how Winona got brought up.
• 30:46
  Speaker 2: So it wasn't a why no writer movie no.
• 30:49
  Speaker 4: Because I'm from Winona Lake, Indiana, So somehow we came
• 30:54
  Speaker 4: up with Winonah is such a beautiful name. And then
• 30:57
  Speaker 4: we both are like, we like that name. It I
• 31:01
  Speaker 4: mean in a lot of ways as an ode to
• 31:02
  Speaker 4: like where I'm from in a place that matters a
• 31:05
  Speaker 4: lot to me. But also it's it's not that in
• 31:09
  Speaker 4: the sense that we just really liked the name. It
• 31:11
  Speaker 4: means first daughter, which we didn't know when we picked
• 31:14
  Speaker 4: it out. Yeah, and like the symbolism of the name
• 31:20
  Speaker 4: why Noona is really beautiful. It has like it means patient,
• 31:25
  Speaker 4: it means resilient, it means kind, it means others focused,
• 31:29
  Speaker 4: and so like there was just a lot of things
• 31:31
  Speaker 4: going well for the name, why Noona and who we
• 31:35
  Speaker 4: dream of her being? But we both it was like
• 31:39
  Speaker 4: the only girl name we both liked. Like I was
• 31:42
  Speaker 4: really into names that had like cute little nicknames like
• 31:45
  Speaker 4: Gigi or like viv or something like that, and so
• 31:49
  Speaker 4: with one Nona, I was like, oh, my gosh, we
• 31:51
  Speaker 4: can call her Winny like yes, and she has a
• 31:54
  Speaker 4: Winnie the Pooh theme nursery that was already in place
• 31:56
  Speaker 4: before we knew the name, So yeah, so that works
• 32:01
  Speaker 4: out really great. We don't want to go overboard on
• 32:03
  Speaker 4: Winnie the Pooh, like we love Winning the Pooh in
• 32:06
  Speaker 4: this household a lot, but we don't want it to
• 32:08
  Speaker 4: be like, oh, we named you after Winning the Poop
• 32:10
  Speaker 4: because we didn't. But she does have like a Winnie
• 32:14
  Speaker 4: the Pooh theme nursery, and we just think it's such
• 32:18
  Speaker 4: a cute little name.
• 32:20
  Speaker 2: So that is so cute. What is the thing about
• 32:25
  Speaker 2: home life with money that is most surprising to you?
• 32:30
  Speaker 3: First of all, our dog is obsessed with her.
• 32:33
  Speaker 2: Yes. Oh, you guys were so stressed, And I told
• 32:37
  Speaker 2: you I was like, our dog hates everyone except we
• 32:41
  Speaker 2: brought our kids home, and she she's like, oh, hey,
• 32:44
  Speaker 2: I was up.
• 32:45
  Speaker 4: Yeah, he's he is obsessed with her in the sweetest way,
• 32:49
  Speaker 4: Like he is sweeter to her than he's ever been
• 32:51
  Speaker 4: to any other human in the world.
• 32:53
  Speaker 2: So special.
• 32:54
  Speaker 4: She lays by her in the morning, he licks like
• 32:58
  Speaker 4: off her shirt like if he can get up to her.
• 33:00
  Speaker 4: Don't try to let him that close. But like if
• 33:02
  Speaker 4: she has like a spit towel, like he'll like care
• 33:06
  Speaker 4: for it. He's incredible with her. So if like I'm
• 33:13
  Speaker 4: holding her on the couch, he always curls up right
• 33:15
  Speaker 4: next to us.
• 33:16
  Speaker 2: So sweet. I'm so happy to hear this.
• 33:19
  Speaker 4: That was the first time. I think there was just
• 33:21
  Speaker 4: a lot going on. We got home from the hospital
• 33:25
  Speaker 4: and Jess pretty much immediately went into nurse and I
• 33:29
  Speaker 4: was like kind of unpacking some stuff, and I walked
• 33:33
  Speaker 4: into the room and Waylon was laying at Jess's feet
• 33:36
  Speaker 4: while when they were in the rocking chair nursing, and
• 33:39
  Speaker 4: I lost it, like, like I've never.
• 33:43
  Speaker 3: Seen him kig like that before.
• 33:45
  Speaker 2: That's beautiful and it's a relief.
• 33:49
  Speaker 4: It's a relief. I prayed like hands and niece straight
• 33:54
  Speaker 4: to Jesus for ten months, even before we knew we
• 33:57
  Speaker 4: were pregnant, Like God like, what can we do to
• 34:03
  Speaker 4: help this dog be the dog I know he is,
• 34:05
  Speaker 4: Like I love him so much and I know he's
• 34:08
  Speaker 4: going to be a great big brother, but like what
• 34:10
  Speaker 4: can we do? And prayers were answered like immediately.
• 34:15
  Speaker 2: So and they have been amazing.
• 34:17
  Speaker 3: Yeah, so that's been amazing, Like we're so grateful for that.
• 34:22
  Speaker 2: Did you have anything that you did specifically aid?
• 34:25
  Speaker 4: We did a lot of training beforehand, Like we did
• 34:27
  Speaker 4: we hired a trainer to do like baby training. We
• 34:30
  Speaker 4: would carry around like a baby doll around the house.
• 34:32
  Speaker 4: We'd lay a baby doll in its crib. We did
• 34:35
  Speaker 4: a lot of like positive reinforcement for like how he
• 34:38
  Speaker 4: would react around the baby doll. And then we sent
• 34:40
  Speaker 4: home some of her items after birth with my parents
• 34:45
  Speaker 4: because they were watching him and he like had those.
• 34:48
  Speaker 4: And then when we got home, we put up a
• 34:50
  Speaker 4: baby gate, put Winnie in a like in our car
• 34:52
  Speaker 4: seat behind the baby gate wheel on the other side
• 34:55
  Speaker 4: so he could like smell her, and then we just
• 34:57
  Speaker 4: like gave him a bunch of treats during it, like
• 35:00
  Speaker 4: tell him he was great, and after that he was
• 35:04
  Speaker 4: kind of like awesome. And Jess has been in like
• 35:10
  Speaker 4: an incredible mother, like it's wild. She knows this baby
• 35:14
  Speaker 4: so well. She knows how what when he's thinking, when
• 35:17
  Speaker 4: he's wanting her, and when he are like bonded in
• 35:21
  Speaker 4: the most beautiful way. And so we've kind of tag
• 35:25
  Speaker 4: teamed it right now, where like Wayland's life hasn't changed
• 35:27
  Speaker 4: that much. He still gets out on walks, my parents
• 35:29
  Speaker 4: are here to help with that, and then like when
• 35:32
  Speaker 4: her parents were out here, like he would have some
• 35:34
  Speaker 4: fun days like outside of the house, and so like
• 35:37
  Speaker 4: his life hasn't changed that much, which I also think
• 35:39
  Speaker 4: has been a big deal. So he's not like jealous
• 35:42
  Speaker 4: or like this sucks, like what's happening. Yeah, So we
• 35:46
  Speaker 4: just kind of tag teamed it the best we can
• 35:48
  Speaker 4: right now.
• 35:49
  Speaker 2: My final question for you, amongst so many more that
• 35:53
  Speaker 2: will come another podcast, and Ben, I feel like we
• 35:55
  Speaker 2: probably need another one, just as like a follow up
• 35:58
  Speaker 2: for all the other questions I didn't ask. But here's
• 36:01
  Speaker 2: a betting question for you, guys. How have you changed
• 36:05
  Speaker 2: in the past week and a half.
• 36:07
  Speaker 4: If I'm honest with you. Jess and I just talked
• 36:09
  Speaker 4: about this last night, and I want to try. I've
• 36:14
  Speaker 4: been thinking a lot about this because I want to
• 36:16
  Speaker 4: be as honest to Dad's as possible. There is a
• 36:19
  Speaker 4: biological connection I think that mothers have with their babies.
• 36:22
  Speaker 4: Obviously they're growing inside of them, you feel the move,
• 36:26
  Speaker 4: you're giving birth to them, right, and then you're you know,
• 36:31
  Speaker 4: responsible for a lot of the things that keep this
• 36:33
  Speaker 4: baby alive. I was more worried about Jessica than I
• 36:37
  Speaker 4: was anything else for a period of time when we're
• 36:40
  Speaker 4: in the hospital. Oh yeah, I'm getting to you, don't
• 36:47
  Speaker 4: be jealous. And then once Winona came out, I just
• 36:53
  Speaker 4: looked over and I saw my family, and then there
• 36:57
  Speaker 4: was like more I'd say, like there was this like
• 36:59
  Speaker 4: peace because of the situation. There was a love because
• 37:05
  Speaker 4: of you know, it being my child, but there was
• 37:08
  Speaker 4: more of an immediate feeling of like protection, like like
• 37:12
  Speaker 4: I'm on guard a little bit now, and then every
• 37:15
  Speaker 4: day gets to where I'm more just like like I
• 37:20
  Speaker 4: worry more. I worry more about why I know that
• 37:23
  Speaker 4: tonight than I did the first night we were home.
• 37:26
  Speaker 4: Like there's well, put there's an everyday kind of like new.
• 37:32
  Speaker 3: Moment.
• 37:33
  Speaker 4: There's a new thing that makes me feel more connected
• 37:36
  Speaker 4: to her. But I won't say, and I don't want
• 37:40
  Speaker 4: to lie and say like the moment she came out
• 37:42
  Speaker 4: of the womb, all of a sudden, this like overwhelming
• 37:44
  Speaker 4: sense of like connection existed. It was more of a
• 37:51
  Speaker 4: like a protection responsibility and a piece that everybody was good.
• 37:56
  Speaker 4: And then every day I think there's a new like
• 37:59
  Speaker 4: something is building and I can feel.
• 38:02
  Speaker 2: That perfectly, perfectly put. Jared would agree with you, yeah, And.
• 38:07
  Speaker 4: I just think it is. I think it's I don't know,
• 38:10
  Speaker 4: everybody probably has a different experience, but when you're a
• 38:14
  Speaker 4: mom like her and Winona, we're together for nine months
• 38:17
  Speaker 4: like without me, and now I'm building this relationship with
• 38:24
  Speaker 4: this girl that you know is in the world. So
• 38:30
  Speaker 4: I'd say that's how i'd explain it. I don't know
• 38:32
  Speaker 4: if that's perfect. I don't know if that summaris perfect
• 38:34
  Speaker 4: summarizes everything. But if I want to be honest, like
• 38:38
  Speaker 4: if I have dads who are like I didn't feel
• 38:41
  Speaker 4: anything for like two months, and I feel guilty about it,
• 38:44
  Speaker 4: and I'm like, now that I'm I'm in it, I'm like,
• 38:46
  Speaker 4: I don't think you should feel guilty about it. I
• 38:48
  Speaker 4: don't know anybody in my life that's like, gosh, dang it,
• 38:51
  Speaker 4: I really wish we never had kids. I know, but
• 38:54
  Speaker 4: I do know people that are like I don't necessarily
• 38:56
  Speaker 4: feel like I thought I did in the first month.
• 38:58
  Speaker 4: I'm somewhere in the middle of that. Yep, you don't
• 39:00
  Speaker 4: want to force it.
• 39:01
  Speaker 2: I think that's something that needs to be talked about
• 39:03
  Speaker 2: more because then it leads to more guys feeling so guilty.
• 39:06
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I don't think Gil is up. I don't think
• 39:08
  Speaker 4: Gil and shame about your reaction? Is is anything helpful?
• 39:14
  Speaker 4: I think it's a natural like progression to this like
• 39:18
  Speaker 4: beautiful place. But goodness, it's beautiful. It's yeah, I'm looking
• 39:25
  Speaker 4: at her. I mean it's beautiful, like it's crazy, it's
• 39:29
  Speaker 4: it's something special. I do. Before we leave, want to
• 39:32
  Speaker 4: give a shout to Rose. She's a Rose Baby, which
• 39:36
  Speaker 4: if you're from Denver, you know, it's like the baby
• 39:39
  Speaker 4: hospital here in Denver. And they were outstanding, like outstanding
• 39:46
  Speaker 4: at every level, at every turn with anything going on.
• 39:51
  Speaker 4: They cared for Jess. Well they cared for why no, no, well,
• 39:56
  Speaker 4: I think they cared about me, but I was more
• 39:58
  Speaker 4: just kind of hanging but like I would, just I
• 40:02
  Speaker 4: want to give them a shout out because they really
• 40:03
  Speaker 4: did do an incredible job.
• 40:07
  Speaker 3: Jess, how do you feel differently the like I'm out
• 40:10
  Speaker 3: of love I have for her. Like Ben said, like
• 40:13
  Speaker 3: I do think there's like more of an adjustment period
• 40:16
  Speaker 3: for the dad, but like I have this like insane
• 40:20
  Speaker 3: protection over her that like my body will like shake
• 40:23
  Speaker 3: if she's crying and I'm not in the room, Like.
• 40:26
  Speaker 2: That is something that you guys will you will feel
• 40:29
  Speaker 2: it more and moarm I think when she starts becoming
• 40:33
  Speaker 2: a little bit more awake to the world and like
• 40:34
  Speaker 2: people will say, oh, you have to let her cry
• 40:37
  Speaker 2: for a little while, you don't like and the mom
• 40:42
  Speaker 2: is like the sound like I can, no, cannot, cannot,
• 40:45
  Speaker 2: And then the dad doesn't hit them the same no.
• 40:49
  Speaker 3: And it's like I've I've tried to explain it to Ben,
• 40:51
  Speaker 3: like it's not that I'm it's not an anxiety. It's
• 40:56
  Speaker 3: just like a like I can make this better, like
• 40:58
  Speaker 3: let me have her exactly.
• 41:00
  Speaker 2: It feels controlling maybe on the outside, but you're like, no, no,
• 41:04
  Speaker 2: I know exactly. I don't know how to describe it.
• 41:06
  Speaker 2: I know exactly how to hold.
• 41:08
  Speaker 3: Yes exactly, and it does feel controlling, and I'm like
• 41:10
  Speaker 3: I don't want to be that mom that's like a
• 41:12
  Speaker 3: helicopter mom, but like I just I feel like I
• 41:16
  Speaker 3: know exactly what she needs. And I've never felt like
• 41:20
  Speaker 3: I have all the answers before, but I feel like
• 41:24
  Speaker 3: with her, I do have all the answers, which is weird.
• 41:27
  Speaker 2: I love the way you put that. That's beautiful.
• 41:32
  Speaker 4: And we're a weekend, so like you know, like there's
• 41:35
  Speaker 4: a lot of like not a long way to go. Yeah, so,
• 41:37
  Speaker 4: but like so far, it's it's I mean, I've known
• 41:41
  Speaker 4: Jessica for a long time. It is there is a change,
• 41:45
  Speaker 4: and in the best of ways, like she's still Jessica,
• 41:48
  Speaker 4: the one I fell in love with, and she still
• 41:52
  Speaker 4: has all the qualities that I need before, but there's
• 41:54
  Speaker 4: like an additional like sensibility, a different an additional like
• 42:04
  Speaker 4: like familiarity of life, and like a confidence that I've
• 42:10
  Speaker 4: never seen her have confidence in before. Like there's a
• 42:12
  Speaker 4: confidence with my Nona that is different and it's beautiful.
• 42:20
  Speaker 4: It's just it's wild to see. And it happened kind
• 42:23
  Speaker 4: of right away, like I could tell, like right as
• 42:24
  Speaker 4: soon as Winona went on her chest when she came out,
• 42:27
  Speaker 4: I like, I, like I said, I could see something
• 42:30
  Speaker 4: changing fierce.
• 42:32
  Speaker 3: Jess Yeah became I became a mom, very real quick.
• 42:36
  Speaker 2: It's so cute. I love it so much, all right,
• 42:38
  Speaker 2: I can't wait to hear more and more about your
• 42:40
  Speaker 2: experiences and all the other details that you're going to
• 42:44
  Speaker 2: realize that you forgot. And we're going to talk to
• 42:47
  Speaker 2: you probably been next week, back next week and Jess,
• 42:52
  Speaker 2: we will talk to you soon and uh text us
• 42:56
  Speaker 2: if you need any advice or any recommendations. You know,
• 42:59
  Speaker 2: we love talking about this.
• 43:00
  Speaker 3: Thank you so much, and thank you for letting me
• 43:02
  Speaker 3: do the whole timeline.
• 43:03
  Speaker 2: I hope that was okay, but it was delightful, true joy.
• 43:08
  Speaker 1: Ok you guys, follow the Ben and Ashley I Almost
• 43:13
  Speaker 1: Famous podcasts on iHeartRadio or subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts.