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The Transformative Power of Thanksgiving and Praise · The Father's Business Podcast

• 0:03
  Speaker 1: The Father's Business was founded by Sylvia Gunter to encourage people to a deeper relationship with God.
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: I'm Elizabeth Gunter Powell.
• 0:11
  Speaker 2: And I am Kimberly Roddy.
• 0:12
  Speaker 2: Welcome to the Father's Business Podcast.
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: We are so glad that you've joined us.
• 0:16
  Speaker 2: Well, hi everyone.
• 0:19
  Speaker 2: Welcome to our podcast today.
• 0:20
  Speaker 2: We're so glad that you're with us today.
• 0:22
  Speaker 2: You know it is crazy to think about this, but Thanksgiving is next week.
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: That is crazy to think about.
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: Kimberly, what are you cooking me for Thanksgiving?
• 0:33
  Speaker 2: Oh, what am I cooking you?
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: Well, if you fly here to Virginia, I will cook you a turkey and sweet potatoes and carrots and green beans, I don't know.
• 0:42
  Speaker 2: Whatever you want, whatever you want, okay, cool, you come on to Virginia and I'll cook for you, all right.
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: But one of the things that we think about is the word gratitude.
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: You know, I was in a couple of airports yesterday and you can see these shirts and signs all around you that say thankful, grateful, blessed.
• 0:59
  Speaker 2: Sometimes it just feels like another seasonal trend, right, like?
• 1:03
  Speaker 2: I mean, my neighbors aren't already decorated for Christmas, so do we even have Thanksgiving, right?
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: That is truly sad.
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: I will admit, I'm one of the holdouts.
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: We don't decorate for Christmas until after Thanksgiving.
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: I agree with you, a lot of my neighbors.
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: It's like Halloween Christmas and we kind of just jump over Thanksgiving.
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: I get it.
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: People enjoy Christmas and they want to enjoy it as much as they can.
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: But yeah, it does kind of feel like it's trendy right now to be thankful and grateful.
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: Sure.
• 1:31
  Speaker 2: And I think we saw that house not long ago when I was in Birmingham that there were some inflatables all in the yard and you had the Christmas ones and the Thanksgiving ones and the snowman.
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: Let's just throw it all out there, right?
• 1:43
  Speaker 2: But in reality, thanksgiving is so much more than just this feel-good idea.
• 1:50
  Speaker 2: If we think about Scripture there are tons of Scripture verses on the idea, sometimes the command of being thankful, I know.
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: 1 Thessalonians 5.18 says In everything, give thanks, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.
• 2:07
  Speaker 2: That's a pretty serious thing to consider.
• 2:10
  Speaker 2: It's God takes thanksgiving serious, right yeah.
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: And I mean I just even you think I don't hear it as much as today, but I know like when we were growing up in the church Kimberly, we would hear a lot about, well, do you know what God's will is for your life?
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: And you always had to figure out what God's will was for your life, kind of thing.
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: And it's like, well, it's right there, it's in everything, give thanks.
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: That's really the will, god's will for your life, not what is your career going to.
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: I mean, that question was often posed to me as a teenager or in college as like, what is your career going to be?
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: What are you going to do with your life?
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: What's God's will for your life?
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: And it's like, well, no, it really is actually giving thanks in all things, regardless of what you're doing.
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: And it is a reoccurring theme in the Bible.
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: I thought of another verse this morning, psalms 106.1.
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: That says give thanks to the Lord, for he is good, his love endures forever.
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: I mean, that's a very familiar verse to a lot of us.
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: And then there's enter his gates with thanksgivings and his courts with praise, and so it is a reoccurring theme in the Bible, and the Greek word often used for thanksgiving is the word Eucharistio.
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: It's a word rich with meaning.
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: It also can mean grace and joy and blessing, and it brings more of a depth to this word thanksgiving, because I think a lot of times I'm guilty of doing it.
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: If someone does something for you, you just go thanks and you know.
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: And so there's a depth to Thanksgiving when you think about it as the word Eucharistio, because you think about communion that we sometimes call the Eucharist, and that's that is the, the reason why it is called.
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: That is because when Jesus broke the bread, he gave thanks and he modeled the power of Thanksgiving for us, and even before he performed some of his miracles, like the feeding of the 5,000, it says that Jesus gave thanks before he performed the miracle of feeding 5,000 people with the fish and the loaves, and so he was modeling for us that Thanksgiving is so vital to our walk with him.
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: And acknowledging God's work in our lives is such an important part.
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: And even back into the Old Testament there's always these times where God's telling us to remember and we've talked about that before remember what God has done for you, and I think Thanksgiving is such a big part of that and the power of Thanksgiving.
• 4:23
  Speaker 2: You know, in the American tradition of a holiday it has to do with pilgrims and Indians and that kind of thing, right.
• 4:30
  Speaker 2: Right, it's an autumn, seasonal thing.
• 4:32
  Speaker 2: But the word thanksgiving, it's giving thanks.
• 4:36
  Speaker 2: It's like you said, it's a Eucharistio.
• 4:38
  Speaker 2: It has a deeper, richer meaning.
• 4:41
  Speaker 2: You were talking a minute ago about God's will.
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: If God's will is for us to give thanks in everything, what's that really look like?
• 4:50
  Speaker 2: And I think about the 10 lepers that were healed in Luke 17.
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: Jesus entered the village and all the lepers met him.
• 4:55
  Speaker 2: They kept their distance, but they raised their voices.
• 4:57
  Speaker 2: They were calling out Jesus, master, have mercy on us, right?
• 4:59
  Speaker 2: So Jesus took a look at them and he said go, show yourselves to the priest.
• 5:03
  Speaker 2: And the scripture says and as they went they were cleansed.
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: One of them, when he saw that he was healed, he came back to Jesus and says he kneeled at Jesus' feet so grateful he couldn't thank him enough, as he was a Samaritan.
• 5:19
  Speaker 2: Jesus said were not 10 healed?
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: Where are the other nine?
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: Can none be found to come back and give glory to god, except this outsider?
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: Get up on your way.
• 5:30
  Speaker 2: Your faith has healed and saved you.
• 5:32
  Speaker 2: So there's this attitude that, like this, one leper came and was truly grateful and the other nine were not for this powerful healing of leprosy.
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and we don't know, because the text doesn't say.
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: But by the way that Jesus said your faith has healed you, the one who came back and said thank you to Jesus for healing him.
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: Do you wonder if the other nine lepers were truly healed, or did their lack of gratitude stop it from happening?
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: We don't know, but what do you think, Kimberly?
• 6:08
  Speaker 2: I mean, I think that begs the question of what is healing.
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 6:12
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I think, Elizabeth, it's interesting because, you know, I think it's like the way we talk about healing.
• 6:18
  Speaker 2: It is tricky, Like sometimes we're afraid to say we've been healed, and other times it's like, oh, I've definitely been healed, I've been healed and it's clear, it's crystal clear, right.
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: So in the NIV, in verse 14, it says and they went and they were cleansed.
• 6:31
  Speaker 2: And then you go on later in verse 17, and it says Jesus asked were not all 10 cleansed?
• 6:36
  Speaker 2: And so if you look at several translations, you've got the words cleanse, you've got the word well, you've got the word healed.
• 6:44
  Speaker 2: But if you look at the original language in the Greek, you see that it's two different words.
• 6:50
  Speaker 2: In verse 14, there's a different word as they went, they were cleansed.
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: But when you get to verse 17, he goes to the end.
• 6:58
  Speaker 2: He says rise and go, your faith has made you well.
• 7:01
  Speaker 2: In verse 19.
• 7:02
  Speaker 2: That is a different word in the Greek and that word has the connotation of whole, Whereas the first word has the connotation of clean, Right, and those are two different things.
• 7:15
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so I mean we don't know beyond that, but that is what we do know.
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, If for no other reason you know, it's the stories in the scripture to again once underscore the importance of gratitude and thanksgiving and understanding, not just celebrating that you've been healed, but going back around to putting the glorification on the one who healed you and the one who gave you that freedom.
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: So but yeah, that's just one of those questions.
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: I always kind of wondered, like, what happened to the other nine lepers?
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: You know, was it a temporary thing, and because they didn't come back and say thank you, it didn't stick, were they healed.
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: And that's the grace of God that, whether you say thank you or not, he heals you, you know?
• 7:57
  Speaker 1: I mean, and I know't know, it's just kind of one of those things where I've wondered, because Thanksgiving is such a big part of the Bible that it should be, in my mind, not something we just focus in on because, oh, it's November, so, okay, now we need to be thankful and celebrate Thanksgiving, but it should be a part of this everyday interaction I have with God.
• 8:23
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 8:24
  Speaker 2: And I think it's interesting too, like in this particular passage with the 10 lepers, when they're begging for mercy, jesus says go see the priest, yeah.
• 8:33
  Speaker 2: So he gives them a command.
• 8:35
  Speaker 2: He didn't actually lay his hands on them and heal them.
• 8:37
  Speaker 2: He gave them a command to go, and so they went to the priest, and then the one came back to find him, yeah.
• 8:44
  Speaker 2: And so they went to the priest and then the one came back to find him.
• 8:46
  Speaker 2: Right, it's a little different story of healing than we have in some of the other passages, and I think it does exemplify the importance of Eucharistio, the importance of giving thanks in everything.
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: And especially in the hard thing.
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: It's really easy to be grateful when life is going well, but also to be able to say thank you when it's not.
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: You know, paul talked a lot about the importance of Thanksgiving or the idea of Eucharistio and everything give thanks, for this is the will of God, but he also talks about the opposite of it.
• 9:17
  Speaker 1: I remember this is where it got kind of convicting for me, because I can be thankful but I can also be a complainer and my mind just works and looks at how things could always be made better.
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: So that makes me rather critical and that can lead to grumbling.
• 9:33
  Speaker 1: The old man and the Muppets yeah, there's two old men in the balcony of the Muppets.
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's us.
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: For those of you that have been following along with us and you've either done the Rock Journey study or you've been listening to our podcast, we did a podcast on the victim mindset and learning that we need to not live with the mindset of a victim but live from our identity, which is we're a covenant son or daughter of God Most High, and if you haven't listened to that, that'd be a great episode to go back to.
• 10:02
  Speaker 1: Also, we've got a conference coming up in March and we're going to be speaking more about that at our conference as well.
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: But when you are living in that mindset of a victim, you are not living as a covenant son or daughter of God Most High.
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: You can't do both right.
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: Either you're letting your identity be defined by your circumstances, or you're letting your identity be defined by your circumstances, or you're letting your identity be defined by God, and when I'm letting my identity be defined by my circumstances, I'm much more likely to fall into that grumbling, complaining, judgmental part of myself versus allowing my identity to be defined by him.
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: And so, on the podcast that we've done on the victim mindset and also at the first level of Rock Journey, the study that we have available on our website, we talk about how do you recognize when you're living in that victim mindset and basically say we don't want to do that.
• 10:58
  Speaker 1: But how do we proactively?
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: It's like when I go to the gym which I need to go to the gym more than I do but I'm doing a lot of exercises right now because I have a shoulder that's not feeling that great and so they have me doing all these exercises to build all the muscles up around it, so my shoulder will function better.
• 11:16
  Speaker 1: And I think it's the same way about Thanksgiving.
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: If I am living with a mindset of Thanksgiving, if I am making an effort to make sure I'm always being grateful, if I'm focusing in on that, it's a whole lot harder to slip into victim thinking when I'm focusing on and being grateful for all that God is doing in my life and it's a whole lot harder to become despondent or to lose hope, even in a hard situation, because I'm focusing on the goodness of God, like the verse I read in Psalm 106, give thanks to the Lord for he is good.
• 11:49
  Speaker 1: I don't give thanks to him just because my circumstances are great.
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: I give thanks to him because he is good, and so I think Eucharist is a big key to not living as a victim.
• 12:00
  Speaker 1: And where it got very convicting for me is when I read 1 Corinthians 10.10.
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: And he's talking about the Jews who were grumbling and complaining and had a lack of gratitude, and he said that those who grumbled were destroyed by the destroyer.
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: I'm like, well, that's getting a little more serious.
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: And if you look in Revelation 9, 1 Corinthians 10.10, there's a verse that says that there was a king over them, the angel of the abyss, whose name in Hebrew is Abaddon and in Greek, Apollon, and that means destroyer, and so one of the things we talk at the more advanced level of Ruach about is okay, are you going to live in a place of Eucharistio or are you going to live in a place of the Abaddon?
• 12:44
  Speaker 1: You going to live in a place of the Abaddon and that makes it a little more serious to me than just.
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: You should be grateful and you shouldn't be complaining so much.
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: The power of words, which we just talked about in our last podcast it cannot be overemphasized here.
• 12:59
  Speaker 1: What's coming out of my mouth is either speaking words of life and thanksgiving or I am speaking the words of the destroyer, and so it's a choice in our everyday life to live as a covenant, son or daughter of God most high live in Eucharistio, or the grumbling and complaining allows us to slip into the victim mindset, and now we're living in Abaddon, and so I think that's why it's so important and this podcast is probably more for me than anyone else that we find ways to be grateful in the good places and the hard places.
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: There's one other story that I want to share.
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: That kind of underlines how seriously God takes all this, is very familiar.
• 13:40
  Speaker 1: It's the 12 spies, the Joshup and Caleb and the 10 other spies go into the land that's been promised to them by God and they scouted.
• 13:44
  Speaker 1: The 10 other spies go into the land that's been promised to them by God and they scouted out.
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: There are giants in the land.
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: That is true.
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: 10 of the spies come back and go.
• 13:54
  Speaker 1: Absolutely not, they're going to kill us.
• 13:56
  Speaker 1: We're like grasshoppers in their eyes.
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: This is not going to end well.
• 13:59
  Speaker 1: We should not Thanks, but no thanks.
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: I don't care if God says that's our land, we're not going.
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: And Josh and Kayla come back with a report saying yeah, there are giants in the land, but God is with us and he will help us take the land.
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: And that is such a good example to me of the difference between the victim mindset saying absolutely not, there's no way, where it's always going to end up bad, we're never going to win versus yes, this is hard, but God is with us.
• 14:27
  Speaker 1: And because he's with us and I'm a covenant daughter of God most high, he's going to see me through this.
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: And what I find so fascinating is it goes that whole story goes on for two chapters and there's a point where the people come to Aaron and Moses and go why did you lead us out here?
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: We were better off in Egypt.
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: And they think about stoning them.
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: Like I mean, it's a whole big deal that starts happening because these 10 spies came back grumbling and complaining about what's in the land.
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: And at the very end of that story it says just how seriously God takes Thanksgiving because it says he struck them down with a plague and killed the 10 spies that came back with a bad report.
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: I remember the first time I read that I was like, wow, okay, I really need to get control over my mouth because I grumble and I complain a lot Kimberly, you know me.
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: I think of the worst case scenario that could happen in any situation, because I want to be prepared.
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: And so this mindset of not believing that God is big enough to carry me through what he has called me to he takes very seriously, to the point that he struck 10 spies dead because they came back with the wrong report.
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: I think because God is so serious about this and I get why he did it.
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: Because that grumbling and complaining does lead to destruction and it also was breeding so much discontent amongst the people and it causes the hearts of the people to be turned against believing in the bigness of who God is, and so I think God commands us to be thankful.
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: Not because he's some egocentric person up there that's waiting for everyone to tell Him how great he is.
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: It's because he knows it's for our own good.
• 16:00
  Speaker 2: I think that that's pretty powerful to think about, because oftentimes we yeah, you and I used to joke about being the old men and the.
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: Muppets.
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: Right, and I think it.
• 16:10
  Speaker 2: You know there's times where, yeah, it's funny to be sarcastic and joking or whatever, but then there's times where we truly just cross on that line of grumbling and complaining and just having that bad attitude about that and I think what we see here is that it's dangerous.
• 16:23
  Speaker 2: It's not just get your attitude in check.
• 16:26
  Speaker 2: It's dangerous and it can lead us into mindset of a victim mindset.
• 16:33
  Speaker 2: It can lead us to a destructive mindset.
• 16:35
  Speaker 2: But when we choose gratitude, when we choose thankfulness and a heart and an attitude of thankfulness, then we are realigning ourselves, we are stepping into living out that identity as covenant sons and covenant daughters of God and it not only changes, it transforms, which is an even bigger word than changes.
• 16:59
  Speaker 2: I think it transforms our perspective and how we're living.
• 17:04
  Speaker 2: And I mean, imagine if you were just referring to, like the Israelites who grumbled and complained in the wilderness, like what would have happened?
• 17:12
  Speaker 2: We don't know, we don't know, and that's not the story but what would have happened if they had thanked God in advance for what he was going to do in the promised land?
• 17:19
  Speaker 2: I mean, the story could have looked different.
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: Well, yeah, they wouldn't have walked around the desert for 40 years.
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: Yeah, right, because it's not just the 10 spies that I mean.
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: God killed them immediately.
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but I mean there was a whole generation.
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: And he's like, well, you're not going in, like you don't trust me enough, and you're grumbling about the manna.
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: Then I give you.
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: You know, the doves come down and I give you meat, and then you grumble about that and you complain about this, about that, you complain about this, and he's just like you're not going to enter.
• 17:45
  Speaker 1: So, yeah, I mean there's a whole generation that would have gone into the promised land.
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: That did not.
• 17:52
  Speaker 2: Well, we talk a lot about how those things can change the atmosphere.
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 18:00
  Speaker 2: This is one of those things that can drastically change the atmosphere.
• 18:02
  Speaker 2: I mean, I even think about when people walk into your home in the holidays.
• 18:03
  Speaker 2: It's a great time to think about that when someone comes in with a grumbling complaining bad attitude.
• 18:07
  Speaker 2: You feel it and it changes things and it's just an interesting thing to think about it in terms of our family relationships and dynamics and day-to-day interactions as well.
• 18:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and as you say that, kimberly, I can kind of feel like there have been those holidays in the past where most of the cooking has landed on me.
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: Or when mom was younger, mom did it and I was her sous chef.
• 18:31
  Speaker 1: So she and I are the ones working really hard for the meal and everyone else is just kind of showing up to eat it.
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: And if we weren't careful, you get that I'm the one doing all the work, I'm doing all the preparation, we're the ones that went to the grocery store, we're the ones that cooked it and feeling unappreciated, or people zoom in, have the meal and zoom off because they've got other people they need to go see that day, and there's just all these unspoken expectations and everyone's got their own stuff that they bring into our family dynamics.
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: Everyone's got their own stuff that they bring into our family dynamics.
• 19:10
  Speaker 1: And, kimberly, you are our family system specialist because of your job in mediation and other things.
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: And how do we start to have this heart of gratitude when it's so easy for us all, as we get back together with our families of origin, to fall into that grumbling, complaining or judgmental place?
• 19:30
  Speaker 2: It's a great question.
• 19:31
  Speaker 2: I think, about just what you said.
• 19:33
  Speaker 2: The premise of that is in James, where he says what causes fights and quarrels among you, it's your desires that wage war within you.
• 19:41
  Speaker 2: And so we have these unspoken desires and sometimes we can choose to speak them.
• 19:48
  Speaker 2: But sometimes they need to go unspoken and that's okay and we just need to deal with them internally.
• 19:52
  Speaker 2: But at the end of the day, the reality is they're unmet and the reality is their expectations.
• 19:58
  Speaker 2: I think where it starts is recognizing one that you do have expectations, I think.
• 20:02
  Speaker 2: So often we think, oh, I'm just going to get together with my family and you're running 90 to nothing.
• 20:06
  Speaker 2: You've taken care of kids, got your spouse, you got work, you got whatever.
• 20:12
  Speaker 2: All you have right, you've got.
• 20:13
  Speaker 2: We all have a lot going on.
• 20:15
  Speaker 2: And so sometimes we're just running to the next thing and we're like I don't really have expectations.
• 20:19
  Speaker 2: Just gonna show up and what's gonna happen is gonna happen.
• 20:21
  Speaker 2: And I want to challenge that a little bit, because I think the majority of us have expectations.
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: We just haven't stopped long enough to really realize that we have an expectation.
• 20:31
  Speaker 2: And so I think it starts with pausing and recognizing okay, what expectations do I have.
• 20:39
  Speaker 2: What desires do I have walking let's just say it's Thanksgiving.
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: What desires or expectations do I have walking into this gathering, this event?
• 20:50
  Speaker 2: Whatever you're doing, if you can understand and recognize, I'm expecting that I'll get a lot of time with my family members.
• 20:58
  Speaker 2: I'm expecting that we'll sit down and we'll have meaningful conversation and I'm expecting that we'll get quality time together.
• 21:05
  Speaker 2: I'm expecting that I'll come in and everyone will give me a big hug and we'll have friendly conversation and love and connection.
• 21:12
  Speaker 2: I'm expecting that we'll come in and everything will just be peaceful and calm and I'll be able to just like blend in with the crowd and not make a big scene and no one's really gonna ask me questions and I'm gonna be okay.
• 21:24
  Speaker 2: I'm expecting that we'll play games and we'll play cards and we'll have a good time together and it won't.
• 21:30
  Speaker 2: It'll be relaxed, like all these different layers of things that you expect, and you got to recognize that.
• 21:36
  Speaker 2: I don't know how many people are in your family and your friend group, I don't know what you're doing, but there's there's definitely.
• 21:42
  Speaker 2: If you're getting together with someone, there's more than one person, right, yeah, and when there's more than one person, there's more than one expectation, even if it is your closest person and you're like, hey, we're on the same page.
• 21:52
  Speaker 2: You're probably not.
• 21:54
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 21:55
  Speaker 2: Because God often puts us with people who are very different from us, and so I think it starts with just acknowledging what are my expectations, and then the reality is, from my perspective, you got to deal with those internally before you step into that environment, as best you can.
• 22:14
  Speaker 2: If you ideally if you can pause and recognize what some of your expectations are, then you can choose to take those and go.
• 22:22
  Speaker 2: You know what I'm going to hold those with an open hand or with open hands, and I'm going to recognize that I'm walking into a scenario, into an event or environment where other people are going to have these same things and we're not all going to be able to meet our expectations.
• 22:38
  Speaker 2: Maybe you don't catch yourself, maybe you don't know how to do that, maybe you don't get the time to do that.
• 22:44
  Speaker 2: Maybe you listen to this podcast driving home from Thanksgiving, you're like, well, that would have been a good idea.
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: Wish I'd listened to this sooner, right.
• 22:52
  Speaker 2: I've done that many times and so that's when you get into repair, you repair what happened.
• 22:58
  Speaker 2: If it's already happened, or if you're in the middle of it, you go okay, hold on, and you start to listen more in the middle and be more attuned and aware.
• 23:05
  Speaker 2: In the middle to go, I think I can tell what's going on here.
• 23:09
  Speaker 2: I'm starting to feel myself wishing for everyone to be.
• 23:14
  Speaker 2: Sometimes we want everyone to feel accommodated.
• 23:16
  Speaker 2: I mean, there are all sorts of expectations out there that we have and that other people will bring into the room.
• 23:21
  Speaker 2: So I think the best thing I can do is encourage you to recognize that you have expectations so that they don't get met with a negative reaction, because if you have an expectation that you're going to have this quality time conversation that's often what mine is I want to have meaningful conversation with people and sometimes people just want to sit there and not just shoot the breeze and catch up, because maybe it's a large family friend gathering and you're not really comfortable having quality conversation.
• 23:52
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 23:53
  Speaker 2: If we don't have that, then I start feeling inside like, well, this was a waste of time, or how do I start being not present?
• 24:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I start disconnecting, detaching a little bit.
• 24:04
  Speaker 2: So if I can start to recognize, you know what, going into this gathering, quality time isn't the end goal for me.
• 24:10
  Speaker 2: It doesn't need to be the end goal for me, because why?
• 24:15
  Speaker 2: You know, like how can I just show up and be present and try to love the people that I'm around, try to have loving conversations, kind conversations, show them I care about them, hope that they show me they care about me, and at the end of the day walk away and go.
• 24:29
  Speaker 2: I know, hey, we had a good time together.
• 24:31
  Speaker 2: We don't get to see each other a lot or we do get to see each other a lot and we had a really great time.
• 24:34
  Speaker 2: You know like lots of different ways to flesh this out.
• 24:37
  Speaker 2: I hope that that's some helpful thoughts there.
• 24:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and, kimberly, I also think, as you're talking, mine are like micro shifts in expectations, because I'm even thinking about scenarios that have happened in my own family or other people I know.
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: So let's say, yeah, we're going to get together as a family, have quality time.
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: Well, one person in my family thinks quality time is we all watch the same movie together.
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: Another person thinks quality time is we play games.
• 25:02
  Speaker 1: Well, within that, one person thinks it's more fun to play cards.
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: Another person thinks it's more fun to play a board game when people get sideways and at least my family system it's not a big thing.
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: It's the micro expectations or desires that you don't even know you have and I know for me, internally, mine is always I have this idea of what the ideal Thanksgiving would be.
• 25:27
  Speaker 1: I've never had the ideal Thanksgiving.
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: I'm not sure anyone has had the ideal Thanksgiving.
• 25:32
  Speaker 1: As to what I say, the ideal Thanksgiving is in my head.
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: Mine is more like a Hallmark movie or scene or something you know or you know, a big family sitcom show where every you know and everything's great and everything gets resolved in 30 minutes.
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: Right, it's that way for me at Christmas and Thanksgiving every year.
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: No matter how great it is.
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: There's a part of me that again, that's part of my wiring what could have been better?
• 25:57
  Speaker 1: And and I can get stuck in that trap of, well, this was good but it wasn't excellent, and I just wish once I could have this most excellent thing.
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: And it's like you say, it's getting your own heart ready before you go.
• 26:13
  Speaker 1: And and I've had to learn that as well, cause I'm like you, I'm like, okay, I don't want to just sit here and tell the same family jokes that we've told every year, like let's get caught up, we don't see each other.
• 26:24
  Speaker 1: How are you really doing?
• 26:26
  Speaker 1: Don't ask me the same three questions you asked me last year.
• 26:28
  Speaker 1: Kind of thing is what I desire out of quality time with people.
• 26:35
  Speaker 1: But you know I've had to get to the point where it's like, elizabeth, if that's what really want, you can pick up a phone or find another time other than this family meal that gets all this pressure put on it and you can have those quality conversations or that quality time a different way and not, as you know, you've talked in the past a lot Kimberly about putting too much weight on people or too much weight on things.
• 27:00
  Speaker 1: I think, a lot of times for me and maybe for other people we put too much weight on.
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: This holiday with my family is going to heal something, do something, fix something inside of me that I mean, I've been on this planet for 52 years now and this holiday has never fixed it before.
• 27:17
  Speaker 1: Why am I having the expectation that this year it's going to be different?
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: Sure.
• 27:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and that's where I think it's about being in the moment and being present and just showing up, because, if we really think about it I think we talked about this when we first started there's this idea of Paul saying and everything, give thanks, for this is God's will for you.
• 27:37
  Speaker 2: Okay, well, I need to walk in this situation and be focused more on giving thanks and being present, rather than on expecting to have an ideal Thanksgiving, instead of expecting to have an ideal conversation, instead of expecting there to be no conflict and only peace and happy feelings, and expecting the dinner table to look like the family meal on Blue Bloods or on the Hallmark show.
• 27:59
  Speaker 1: Right right.
• 28:00
  Speaker 2: I mean, those are great pictures and what we long for in that is a picture of peace and connection.
• 28:07
  Speaker 2: Yes, but I think sometimes we end up not having that because we force it or we long for it so much and we don't think we're getting it, so we back off, we create this conflict, and so I think it is a matter of just how can I show up and be thankful that I have a place to go, that I have friends to show up with, I have a family to show up with, that I have.
• 28:26
  Speaker 2: Whatever you know, whatever your situation is maybe you're alone on Thanksgiving how can you be thankful in that, um, while other people around you are posting pictures of not being alone?
• 28:36
  Speaker 2: Um, and some of those people in those pictures wish they were alone, Right right, like the grass is always greener on the other side, and and you know what's it look like when you're, when you're sitting and I've.
• 28:46
  Speaker 2: I have a family that I know in South Carolina who's got a son that's in the hospital right now.
• 28:52
  Speaker 2: He's not going to be out of the intensive care unit on Thanksgiving.
• 28:55
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 28:56
  Speaker 2: And that's going to look different for them.
• 28:57
  Speaker 2: How do they give thanks in the midst of that?
• 28:59
  Speaker 2: There's nothing easy about this, but it is a choice.
• 29:04
  Speaker 2: It's a command.
• 29:06
  Speaker 2: It's a choice, and so I think it is something that we have to choose to focus on, rather than focusing on what we want.
• 29:15
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah.
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: And one last thing I want us to touch on as we kind of close our conversation about Thanksgiving is the connection between Thanksgiving and praise, and you were kind of already headed that direction a bit.
• 29:26
  Speaker 1: You know we've already referenced the verses that talk about entering His gates with Thanksgiving and His courts with praise, and we're told to bring a sacrifice of praise.
• 29:33
  Speaker 1: And I love the phrase sacrifice of praise because in my own experience some of the most beautiful moments of worship and gratitude come not when everything's going great.
• 29:43
  Speaker 1: It's easy to be thankful when it's going well.
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: I mean, kimberly, if you want to give me a million dollars, I will be very grateful and it'll be very easy for me to be very grateful to you for giving me a million dollars.
• 29:54
  Speaker 1: So I'll just wait and just let me know when the check's in the mail.
• 29:57
  Speaker 1: But to bring a sacrifice of praise when life is not going well is so much harder.
• 30:05
  Speaker 1: And Psalm 13 is one of my favorite psalms and the first part of it is David is just pouring out all of his struggles.
• 30:11
  Speaker 1: People are trying to kill him, life is not going well.
• 30:13
  Speaker 1: He feels like God has forgotten him.
• 30:15
  Speaker 1: But then it turns a corner at the end and it says I will sing to the Lord for he has been good to me.
• 30:21
  Speaker 1: And so gratitude doesn't ignore that things are hard, but it brings God's goodness into focus.
• 30:27
  Speaker 1: And I'm mindful that in this verse and also the verse we've already quoted from Psalm 106, where it says give thanks to Lord.
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: Why?
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: Not because of your circumstances, but because he is good, and I think so much, we want to tie thanksgiving to our circumstances.
• 30:45
  Speaker 1: I can be grateful for, and you're looking for, what's going well in your life, and that is a great thing.
• 30:50
  Speaker 1: I mean because in everything give thanks, right.
• 30:52
  Speaker 1: But I think God's idea of thankfulness is because of who he is, not because of where we find ourselves, and so it's focusing in on the goodness of God, whether it feels good in the moment that we find ourselves in or not.
• 31:10
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you're absolutely right.
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: It's not about things being perfect, which is our desire to some degree or another right.
• 31:16
  Speaker 2: It's about seeing the character of God and bringing that sacrifice of praise even when it's hard.
• 31:24
  Speaker 2: So that's a question that we can all ask ourselves as we approach this next week is how can we bring that sacrifice of praise even when it's hard?
• 31:36
  Speaker 1: Well, kimberly, we have, in our new book that just got released, our new devotional Strength to Equal Our Days.
• 31:41
  Speaker 1: There is a prayer of praise and thanksgiving that I'd love to close this out with and just use it as a way to pray for all of us and to bless our own spirit, souls and bodies to be in alignment with Father, son and Holy Spirit as we approach Thanksgiving, with many of us traveling to visit family and be with family, so let's pray as we close.
• 32:00
  Speaker 1: Father, we enter your presence with a heart full of gratitude and thank you, not just for the blessings we see, but for the unwavering goodness that is at the core of who you are.
• 32:13
  Speaker 1: Thank you that your goodness is not dependent on our circumstances.
• 32:18
  Speaker 1: Thank you that your goodness is not dependent on our circumstances.
• 32:22
  Speaker 1: Your love is not conditional on our actions and your faithfulness knows no bounds.
• 32:27
  Speaker 1: In every season and in every situation, you remain the same you are good, you are loving, you are faithful.
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: Help us remember the countless ways you have shown up in our lives.
• 32:42
  Speaker 1: It's so easy to complain and be ungrateful, but let our hearts and minds recall the times when your faithfulness sustained us, the moments when you provided for our needs, and the unending love you have poured into our hearts.
• 32:54
  Speaker 1: Help us to cultivate a heart of gratitude, not just for the blessings you have given us, but for who you are.
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: You are faithful, you are loving, you are kind and you are good.
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: Let our thanksgiving be rooted in the unchanging nature of your character, even in the midst of difficult places.
• 33:17
  Speaker 1: Help us live each day in the light of your goodness, with a spirit of thankfulness that reflects your enduring love.
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: May our hearts always respond with praise, recognizing that you are worthy of praise and thanksgiving in all things.
• 33:32
  Speaker 1: We pray this in your name, amen.
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: We hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving.
• 33:36
  Speaker 2: We pray this in your name Amen.
• 33:37
  Speaker 2: We hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving and we will be back with you in December.
• 33:41
  Speaker 2: I want to thank you for listening to the Father's Business Podcast.
• 33:50
  Speaker 1: This podcast is made possible through donations by people like you.
• 33:54
  Speaker 1: To donate, go to wwwTheFathersBusinesscom.
• 33:58
  Speaker 1: No-transcript.