Latest / I Choose Me with Jennie Garth / I Choose ... a Happy Holiday!

Transcript

I Choose ... a Happy Holiday! · I Choose Me with Jennie Garth

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: You're listening to I Choose Me with Jenny Girl. Happy
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: holidays everyone, Okay, I'm sending you so much love from
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: my house to yours. And at my house, the trees decorated,
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: the lights are on, the music's on. We are all
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: still in our cute matching jammies, our Christmas jammies. I've
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: made it a tradition, you guys, to all have matching
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: jammis every year. I know it's a little extra. The
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: guys don't really love it as much as the girls,
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: but they humor me. So thanks guys. And honestly, I
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: might just order Chinese food because I'm so wiped for Thanksgiving,
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: if I'm being honest. But in all this coziness, I'm
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: also thinking ahead, because somehow we are already on the
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: edge of twenty twenty six. I cannot believe it. So
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: today's episode of I Choose Me is a gentle one.
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: It's a pause, a look back at twenty twenty five,
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: the places we have stretched ourselves to thin, the moments
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: we abandon our own needs, the boundaries we didn't hold,
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: and then the part I love. We are going to
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: walk into the new year together with honesty and forgiveness,
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: and six simple ways to choose ourselves with more peace
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: and intention. So if you need a little grounding today,
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: a little hope, or just a moment that is yours,
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: this episode is for you because we are on the
• 1:36
  Speaker 1: cusp of a brand new year. So here we go.
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: Here's my first question for you. Where did you give
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: more energy than you got back? Think about that. Maybe
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: it was your work. Maybe it was a relationship where
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: you did more of the heavy emotional lifting. Maybe it
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: was always being the reliable one, the fixer, the helper,
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: the person everyone calls when their lives are falling apart.
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: Even though you would drop everything to help the people
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: you love, maybe you didn't ask for help because, like me,
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: you didn't want to be a burden. We all do it.
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: We all have those blind spots where we treat ourselves
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: like an afterthought. The problem is when you spend a
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: whole year being the emotional shock absorber for everyone else,
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: you end up depleted, resentful, and just bone tired in
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: a way sleep can't even fix. So let's do this.
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: Let's name it. Where did you say yes when you
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: meant no? Where did you ignore the little voice in
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: your gut? Where did you feel small or invisible or unheard,
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: but just kept going anyway. I had moments of that
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: this year. Moments where my schedule owned me like a
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: dog on a leash instead of the other way around.
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: Moments where I let someone else's expectations override my own needs.
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: Moments where I poured from a cup that was basically
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: as dry as the Haar desert. This year, I like
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: to be done with that this new year. I want
• 3:37
  Speaker 1: to stand up for myself the way I stand up
• 3:40
  Speaker 1: for my kids, from my mom, from my husband, for
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: my friends. And I want that for you too. So
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: get ready. Let's blow twenty twenty six up in the
• 3:53
  Speaker 1: best way possible. So here are six solid ways to
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: chew yourself in the new year. Not fluffy resolutions that
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: never happen, not New Year Knew Me, bullshit pressure. I'm
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: talking real tools for real humans trying to build real peace.
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: Number One, set one boundary you can actually enforce, not
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: ten boundaries. One boundary, one place where you stop abandoning yourself.
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: Maybe it's not answering work techs after a certain hour.
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: I see my producer nodding right now, hoping that I
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: do that one. Maybe it's telling the friend who always
• 4:39
  Speaker 1: trauma dumps. I love you, but I am not available
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: for this right now. Maybe it's saying no to hosting everything,
• 4:49
  Speaker 1: every holiday, every school thing, every family obligation. Find the
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: place where twenty twenty five took advantage of you and
• 4:58
  Speaker 1: seal that leak. A boundary is not a wall, it's
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: a doorway where you are the one who gets to
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: decide who walks through. Number two, Reclaim the time you
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: gave away last year. In my twenty fifth hour episode,
• 5:17
  Speaker 1: we talked about how there is no magical extra hour
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: waiting for us in the sky. We have the same
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: twenty four hours as everyone else. And guess what, we
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: use a good chunk of twenty twenty five pouring our
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: time into things that didn't serve us or our well being.
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: So in twenty twenty six, picture yourself choosing one window
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: of time every week, just one that is yours, non negotiable, untouchable,
• 5:48
  Speaker 1: and start to cross off that time in your brand
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: new calendar. Maybe it's Sunday mornings, Maybe it's Wednesdays at lunch.
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: Maybe it's thirty minutes the end of the day. In
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: your version of a rose Garden, protect it. Follow through
• 6:07
  Speaker 1: with it. Treat it like it is an appointment with
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: your future self, because that is exactly what it is.
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: Number three, stop explaining your no. We over explain everything
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: because we don't want to disappoint anyone. We over explain
• 6:25
  Speaker 1: because we feel guilty for our own needs. We over
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: explain because we think a no has to come with
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: a full report, but it doesn't. A simple thank you,
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: but I'm not available right now, or I can't take
• 6:43
  Speaker 1: that on this week. That's enough. It might be hard
• 6:47
  Speaker 1: because they may be disappointed, But my dear, that is
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: theirs to hold, not yours. I know, why know. Maybe
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: let's hear that again. If they're disappointed because you said no,
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: that is theirs too hold. That might take some practice,
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: but you can do it. You saying no is okay.
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: A no is complete on its own. You don't need
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: to dress it up, accessorize it, or give it a
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: long backstory. Next year, allow yourself to say no more often.
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: Number four, Rest like it's part of your job, because
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: it is. Here's something we forget. Rest is not a
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: reward at the end of the week. It's maintenance that
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: allows you to show up for a busy week. I've
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: said it before, rest is not lazy. It's maintenance for
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: your soul. And that truth applies double during the holiday
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: season as we wind down and and we ramp up
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: for a new year. We live in a culture that
• 8:03
  Speaker 1: celebrates burnout like it's a badge of honor. We choose
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: productivity like it's proof of our worth or something. We
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: treat exhaustion like it's noble. But if you don't rest,
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: guess what you break. And if you break, everything around
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: you breaks a little bit too. In these last days
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: at twenty twenty five, choose rest, Choose recovery, Choose softness,
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: Choose not pushing through when your body is begging you
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: to stop. You know, I'm also talking to myself here,
• 8:44
  Speaker 1: so thank you for walking this journey with me. And
• 8:47
  Speaker 1: I really mean that number five. Tell yourself the truth
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: about your relationships. I know this is a hard one,
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: but in the new year, you deserve honesty. So I
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: want you to ask yourself who showed up for you
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: this year, Who consistently took from you without giving back,
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: Who drains your energy? Who makes you feel good? Who
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: makes you feel like the person you want to be.
• 9:22
  Speaker 1: This isn't about cutting people out dramatically. I wouldn't recommend
• 9:26
  Speaker 1: that I've done it doesn't go over well. It's about
• 9:31
  Speaker 1: repositioning what's important to you. Spend less time chasing people
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: who don't choose you, and spend more time watering the
• 9:41
  Speaker 1: relationships that make you feel whole. Choose reciprocity, Choose emotional safety.
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: Choose people who see your worth without asking you to
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: earn it. And number six for twenty twenty six, choose
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: goals that serve your soul. Your New year goals don't
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: have to be sparkly, impressive or instagram worthy. Honestly, most
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: New Year's resolutions actually fail in the first two weeks
• 10:14
  Speaker 1: of January. So make goals that serve you period. Maybe
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: your goal is to speak more kindly to yourself or
• 10:24
  Speaker 1: to your spouse. Maybe it's to stop fixing other people's problems.
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: Maybe it's to let something be good enough instead of perfect,
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: to stop saying sorry every time you need something or
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: don't like something. Maybe it's to practice being comfortable saying no.
• 10:46
  Speaker 1: Your goals should nourish you, not push you too hard
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: or punish you. Okay, now take a little break, take
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: a breath, Let that all settle in choosing yourself in
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: the New Year isn't about tightening up or toughening up
• 11:05
  Speaker 1: or being stronger. It's about softening into who you really
• 11:10
  Speaker 1: are and protecting that person with everything you've got. It's
• 11:16
  Speaker 1: about deciding that the version of you who got bruised
• 11:21
  Speaker 1: in twenty twenty five deserves better in twenty twenty six.
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: It's about creating a life where your peace is not
• 11:31
  Speaker 1: an afterthought. It's about remembering that you can love deeply
• 11:38
  Speaker 1: and still say no. Sometimes you can show up and
• 11:43
  Speaker 1: still set boundaries. You can be nurturing and still refuse
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: to deplete yourself completely. Remember you don't need another hour.
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: You just need to believe that you are worthy of
• 12:01
  Speaker 1: the hours you already have. So as we say goodbye
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: to twenty twenty five, let's give ourselves a break. Let's
• 12:11
  Speaker 1: reflect on all that has happened, what we've accomplished, and
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: what we have chosen for ourselves so far. In the
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: new year, please stay with me as we continue to
• 12:26
  Speaker 1: challenge ourselves to grow and to choose ourselves all over again.
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: Congratulations on a job well done. I'm so proud of you.
• 12:37
  Speaker 1: Congratulations for getting comfortable choosing yourself, for honoring the version
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: of yourself you are becoming because when you choose yourself,
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: everything else becomes a little more possible. I love you
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: all so much. Happy holidays, Let's keep going together.