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Fixing the Crystal Skull · Movie Meltdown

• 0:04
  Speaker 1: I'm Joe Alves, and you're listening to Movie Meltdown.
• 0:22
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• 0:33
  Speaker 2: Our nuclear reactor pumping out one million kilowatts of power.
• 1:03
  Speaker 2: What's up and welcome to Movie Mountain.
• 1:04
  Speaker 4: I'm Brian.
• 1:04
  Speaker 5: I'm Gina.
• 1:05
  Speaker 3: Oh, doing the opposite direction now. We're going counterclockwise.
• 1:08
  Speaker 2: I'm Paul. If you're familiar with these two, that intro
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: should not surprise you. So, we're back. Coming to you
• 1:37
  Speaker 2: live via digital recording from Blue Jay Way. Crazy with
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: whatever disease we've picked up and has taken over our brains.
• 1:45
  Speaker 5: The Corolla virus. Oh.
• 1:49
  Speaker 2: I love Toyota. It's not sponsored by Toyota. Or if so,
• 1:54
  Speaker 2: they need to send the check right now.
• 1:56
  Speaker 5: Do Corollas even exist anymore?
• 1:59
  Speaker 2: Think that they do yeah oh really it's just a
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: new rounded version probably every car is just a big
• 2:04
  Speaker 2: round so my aunt.
• 2:05
  Speaker 5: Has a nissan and she names it liam nissan every
• 2:08
  Speaker 5: time she gets a new one it has a very particular.
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: Set of skills not getting her where she wants to
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: go taking down the human trafficking it is trade.
• 2:23
  Speaker 5: One step at a time i guess i don't know
• 2:27
  Speaker 5: Via Nissan.
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: There's an Arab there at the end, actually.
• 2:30
  Speaker 5: I don't know. The first one is the only one
• 2:32
  Speaker 5: I've seen. I mean, I've watched them all, but the
• 2:34
  Speaker 5: first one is the only one I've seen.
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: I've watched them all. I don't remember anything, but I've
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: watched them.
• 2:39
  Speaker 5: They're all kind of the same.
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: The hell you say? A repetitive plot line in a movie? What?
• 2:45
  Speaker 2: I don't think so. Speaking of the... That being said,
• 2:49
  Speaker 2: we are back to continue our ridiculous series that we
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: made up several episodes ago. And that was Zoom's fault.
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: We just, we came up with it and we decided
• 3:01
  Speaker 2: to assign ourselves things like we should recast this role
• 3:05
  Speaker 2: and see if it fixes this problem. So the one
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: that we gave ourselves several times ago when we spoke,
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: I had to do, not had to, I took it
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: upon myself to do an extra level of research because
• 3:20
  Speaker 2: as we were talking, we were recapping that you had
• 3:23
  Speaker 2: recently watched the fourth Indiana Jones film. And I was like,
• 3:28
  Speaker 2: I haven't seen it in forever, and everybody hates that kid.
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: What's that annoying child's name? Charlie LaBouffe. LaBouffe. And he's
• 3:36
  Speaker 2: not a child. Everybody hates the LaBouffe. He was closer
• 3:40
  Speaker 2: back then. He was childish. He certainly isn't now. So
• 3:44
  Speaker 2: back at that time when the movie came out, that
• 3:47
  Speaker 2: was a huge problem for a lot of people. So
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: I posed the question, if you replaced him, do you
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: think everybody would still hate that movie? Because fans of
• 3:59
  Speaker 2: the Indiana Jones series hate that movie.
• 4:02
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean, I think that the question you're asking
• 4:05
  Speaker 5: is like from a divided household as we discuss it.
• 4:08
  Speaker 5: Because I think that you didn't think it was bad.
• 4:11
  Speaker 2: Well, let's not go there. Let's not say that. As
• 4:17
  Speaker 2: my preparation, I think I said, I was like, I
• 4:21
  Speaker 2: think I bought a copy of it. I found it.
• 4:23
  Speaker 2: It was sitting on the shelf. Still wrapped in plastic.
• 4:26
  Speaker 2: So last night I cracked it open.
• 4:29
  Speaker 5: It's worth like 50 cents less now that you opened it.
• 4:32
  Speaker 2: Darn. So I rewatched the Temple of the Skull Crystal-y,
• 4:40
  Speaker 2: whatever the hell. The Legend of the Crystal Skull something.
• 4:45
  Speaker 5: And whatnot.
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: I rewatched it last night. Yeah.
• 4:47
  Speaker 5: Wow.
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: So, I have a fresh perspective. The thing is, as
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: I said at the time, I watched it again and
• 4:54
  Speaker 2: I'm like, I kind of land in the same spot. Like,
• 4:57
  Speaker 2: from when I saw it, I guess in the theater. Like,
• 4:59
  Speaker 2: I went and saw it when it came out. I
• 5:01
  Speaker 2: think that's the last time I'd seen it. Which was
• 5:05
  Speaker 2: kind of like, is it great? No. But... Is it
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: really that far off? Which is why I wanted to
• 5:13
  Speaker 2: throw out that, like, if we change a few elements
• 5:16
  Speaker 2: about it, does it fix the problems? Because there's so
• 5:19
  Speaker 2: many times in the movie where I'm like, this is
• 5:22
  Speaker 2: Harrison Ford wearing the jacket, wearing the hat, going in
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: the middle of a crypt, digging around, looking for stuff.
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: I love what's on screen right now. And then there's
• 5:30
  Speaker 2: a next scene that I'm like, oh, this is kind
• 5:32
  Speaker 2: of not really up to par, but. The next scene,
• 5:36
  Speaker 2: back to being cool. So I'm just like, there's elements
• 5:39
  Speaker 2: there that are true throughout the other three movies. So
• 5:43
  Speaker 2: what is it about this one that is so different
• 5:45
  Speaker 2: that almost across the board, people were just like, I
• 5:48
  Speaker 2: hate that movie. Well, okay.
• 5:50
  Speaker 5: So let me start with what I think. I think
• 5:52
  Speaker 5: that the idea that Shia LaBeouf would take the place
• 5:57
  Speaker 5: of Harrison Ford, as a Harrison Ford fan, you guys
• 6:00
  Speaker 5: may know. I don't know if you know this about me. Anyway.
• 6:03
  Speaker 6: Anyway.
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  Speaker 5: I think that that idea was thrust upon people that
• 6:08
  Speaker 5: would be like, that's ridiculous.
• 6:11
  Speaker 2: Right?
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  Speaker 5: It's part of it. However, it also comes across as
• 6:16
  Speaker 5: like Indiana Jones brought to you by History Channel's alien,
• 6:23
  Speaker 5: whatever that show is.
• 6:23
  Speaker 2: That's the other thing that annoys people. So I almost
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: want to throw that out there, too. If you take
• 6:30
  Speaker 2: out that part of the plot, if the whole rest
• 6:33
  Speaker 2: of the plot becomes him searching for, because it all
• 6:36
  Speaker 2: just becomes him running around looking for something. That's every
• 6:38
  Speaker 2: damn movie. So if he's running around looking for something
• 6:41
  Speaker 2: and at the end it wasn't alien related, would everybody
• 6:44
  Speaker 2: be okay with this movie? Even with Shia there, would
• 6:47
  Speaker 2: that change it enough? No, no, no, no.
• 6:49
  Speaker 5: Because it's the whole idea. Like the first one was
• 6:52
  Speaker 5: so good and the third one was decent because who
• 6:56
  Speaker 5: doesn't hate Hitler? So you kind of have to give
• 6:59
  Speaker 5: a pass.
• 7:00
  Speaker 2: But you love commies is what you're saying.
• 7:02
  Speaker 6: No.
• 7:03
  Speaker 5: So there's so many weird campy things that happen in
• 7:06
  Speaker 5: Temple of Doom and then in this one that you're like,
• 7:10
  Speaker 5: it's just too much.
• 7:11
  Speaker 2: It's too campy for me. There's a thing that you're forgetting.
• 7:14
  Speaker 7: And I know that people are going to say, after
• 7:17
  Speaker 7: I say this, they're going to say, well, that's totally insignificant.
• 7:20
  Speaker 2: But I think that there's something to it. I'm going
• 7:21
  Speaker 2: to say three things.
• 7:24
  Speaker 6: One.
• 7:24
  Speaker 5: One.
• 7:25
  Speaker 2: Snakes. Snakes. Why did it have to be snakes?
• 7:29
  Speaker 5: All right.
• 7:29
  Speaker 2: That's quote number one. Two, Kalima Shakti Dei. That's quote
• 7:35
  Speaker 2: number two. And quote three. I texted that to you
• 7:38
  Speaker 2: the other day, by the way. I know.
• 7:40
  Speaker 5: I know.
• 7:40
  Speaker 2: And quote three. It's just letting them in on me.
• 7:42
  Speaker 2: Quote three is the dog. They named the dog Indiana. Oh,
• 7:49
  Speaker 2: my God.
• 7:50
  Speaker 7: There's no quote in the fourth movie that is memorable
• 7:55
  Speaker 7: or interesting or.
• 7:58
  Speaker 8: You know.
• 7:59
  Speaker 5: Wait.
• 7:59
  Speaker 2: I mean, I just watched it last night, and I'm
• 8:01
  Speaker 2: trying to think of one.
• 8:02
  Speaker 5: There's nothing.
• 8:03
  Speaker 2: And I really don't have one.
• 8:04
  Speaker 5: Can I sidebar, and I have to give a shout
• 8:06
  Speaker 5: out to like the maker space that I belong to,
• 8:08
  Speaker 5: which makes me sound like a super nerd, and I
• 8:10
  Speaker 5: am not.
• 8:11
  Speaker 2: That's arguable.
• 8:13
  Speaker 5: They got this beautiful like, you know, like herding Australian shepherd,
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  Speaker 5: and they named it Indiana because of Indiana Jones. Because
• 8:21
  Speaker 5: of the whole, they named the dog Indiana.
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  Speaker 2: Because of the third movie.
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  Speaker 5: And they are like 15 years younger than us.
• 8:26
  Speaker 2: So, so is it, That's a good point.
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  Speaker 5: Like, that carries over.
• 8:32
  Speaker 7: That perfectly proves my point. So they are creating the
• 8:37
  Speaker 7: story arc of Indiana Jones, the first three movies, as
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  Speaker 7: a thing. But in the fourth, he's this old guy
• 8:45
  Speaker 7: who's a professor who is supposedly passing on the torch
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  Speaker 7: to this young guy, but it doesn't.
• 8:49
  Speaker 2: Wait, who got all the ladies when he was a
• 8:50
  Speaker 2: professor for the first time?
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  Speaker 6: Is he?
• 8:51
  Speaker 2: Because we don't get to that at all. No, we
• 8:53
  Speaker 2: don't get to that. Huh? Like, even in the movie,
• 8:55
  Speaker 2: we don't ever get that until that very last scene,
• 8:58
  Speaker 2: and then it didn't happen anyway. But you sort of
• 9:00
  Speaker 2: assume that that's what's going on because there's none of
• 9:03
  Speaker 2: the other things that happen. Are you bringing that to it? Like,
• 9:06
  Speaker 2: is that from the outside? I am sure that you're right.
• 9:08
  Speaker 2: I am sure that you're right. They're just trying to
• 9:10
  Speaker 2: bring in that dumb kid to take over the series.
• 9:12
  Speaker 2: You could be right. Because within the plot, that's not
• 9:15
  Speaker 2: at all referenced. No, but that's the undercurrent.
• 9:18
  Speaker 5: I think that that's the undercurrent in the vibe.
• 9:21
  Speaker 2: And again, watching it last night, I don't think that's
• 9:23
  Speaker 2: the case within the plot because he's not good at
• 9:27
  Speaker 2: any of that. Like the character of Mutt, I think
• 9:30
  Speaker 2: that's what is sort of lacking. Some of which may
• 9:33
  Speaker 2: be due to Jaya, but maybe not. Like I think
• 9:35
  Speaker 2: the way it's written... He's not really interesting at all.
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: And what you want... When Indy snaps into it... Indy
• 9:44
  Speaker 2: gets so into what he's doing. And he still does
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: it in this fourth movie. You see him get really
• 9:49
  Speaker 2: excited about looking at maps. And, oh, this is where
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: they're in. Figuring things out. And Mutt's always standing off
• 9:54
  Speaker 2: to the side going, well, wait. What? like he never
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: knows what the hell is going on so much so
• 9:59
  Speaker 2: that like Indy has to bond with our villainous yeah
• 10:03
  Speaker 2: and she's like smart and like awesome well no she
• 10:06
  Speaker 2: yeah and she's really good so it's like within that
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: moment i'm like oh i kind of wish we had
• 10:09
  Speaker 2: somebody else here like her that was on our side
• 10:12
  Speaker 2: so that he'd have somebody to team up with and
• 10:14
  Speaker 2: this would be a fun scene but instead you know
• 10:17
  Speaker 2: like that's the best we get is him and the
• 10:19
  Speaker 2: bad guy or like excited about trying to find this
• 10:22
  Speaker 2: thing well where mutt really brings nothing to.
• 10:24
  Speaker 5: It but because we're looking at it from like The
• 10:28
  Speaker 5: perspective outside of the story. We know that he's supposed
• 10:31
  Speaker 5: to take it over.
• 10:32
  Speaker 2: No, I'm talking about it within the series. Like, all
• 10:35
  Speaker 2: those other three movies, he usually has somebody else that
• 10:38
  Speaker 2: he can kind of discuss this with. Like, Marcus is
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: always there for that. You know, it's like he's discussing, oh,
• 10:44
  Speaker 2: this is where I found them. Even if it's after
• 10:45
  Speaker 2: the fact sometimes. Like, he's got somebody else that's on
• 10:48
  Speaker 2: his level.
• 10:49
  Speaker 6: Right.
• 10:49
  Speaker 5: Okay.
• 10:50
  Speaker 2: Like, intelligence-wise, or at least interest in the projects-wise, and, like, so... Right.
• 10:55
  Speaker 2: You don't have as much, like, I guess short rounds
• 10:57
  Speaker 2: are go-to of the second one, but, like, by the
• 10:59
  Speaker 2: third one, like, his dad equally has invested a little
• 11:02
  Speaker 2: more bookish about it, but, like, he's still smart and
• 11:06
  Speaker 2: knows what he's talking about when he's referencing these things,
• 11:08
  Speaker 2: and then we get to this one, and, like... He's
• 11:10
  Speaker 2: just talking to himself the whole time because Mutt's not
• 11:13
  Speaker 2: there to pick up the other half of this.
• 11:15
  Speaker 5: But also they've taken like Karen Allen's like voice out
• 11:18
  Speaker 5: of it, right? Like the character of Marion, they have
• 11:21
  Speaker 5: robbed her of her street smarts and her capacity. That
• 11:25
  Speaker 5: is a great point.
• 11:26
  Speaker 2: I will not argue that. Because she was awesome in
• 11:28
  Speaker 2: the first. I love her and she has nothing to
• 11:30
  Speaker 2: do in this movie.
• 11:31
  Speaker 5: And she's just like a plot device and she doesn't.
• 11:35
  Speaker 5: I mean, the whole thing. That's why I hate it.
• 11:37
  Speaker 2: I'm shocked that they brought her back. I thought that
• 11:39
  Speaker 2: was so great because I want to see Karen Allen
• 11:41
  Speaker 2: in anything, but they really needed to give her more
• 11:44
  Speaker 2: to do because the best she gets is driving a vehicle.
• 11:47
  Speaker 5: Yeah, because she was like totally smart and brilliant and
• 11:51
  Speaker 5: 20 and lived in Tibet in like a crazy scenario.
• 11:54
  Speaker 5: And then they just like take all of her power away.
• 11:57
  Speaker 2: It's another great quote. It's another great quote. I'm your
• 12:00
  Speaker 2: damn partner.
• 12:01
  Speaker 8: I'm your partner.
• 12:02
  Speaker 2: That's a great quote.
• 12:02
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 12:03
  Speaker 2: That's a great quote.
• 12:04
  Speaker 7: There's no memorable quotes in the fourth movie at all.
• 12:08
  Speaker 5: Is it her here? That's one of my favorites. How
• 12:11
  Speaker 5: about here? But anyway, you know, she's like the great
• 12:16
  Speaker 5: 40s femme fatale, but with brains, you know, because that's
• 12:21
  Speaker 5: what that calls back to. And then in that, she's
• 12:23
  Speaker 5: just useless.
• 12:24
  Speaker 2: She's just a mom. A 50s mom. She's just a mom.
• 12:27
  Speaker 5: It's not even that. She's just robbed of her voice
• 12:31
  Speaker 5: and her power. And she's... Like, I always... loved her
• 12:35
  Speaker 5: in the first one. And I'm like, she was my hero.
• 12:37
  Speaker 5: She was like a tomboy, but she was smart and cute.
• 12:41
  Speaker 2: She is awesome. And part of what makes that first
• 12:43
  Speaker 2: movie so good. Yeah, because they.
• 12:44
  Speaker 5: Have this like, thing and in that one like in
• 12:48
  Speaker 5: the second one whatever she's not in another one it's
• 12:50
  Speaker 5: her dad yeah.
• 12:52
  Speaker 2: I only realized that in watching it in later years
• 12:55
  Speaker 2: like at the time I was like oh I love
• 12:57
  Speaker 2: this movie and now when I watch it I'm like
• 12:59
  Speaker 2: wow she's really annoying like the fact that he doesn't
• 13:01
  Speaker 2: just strangle Willie Scott yeah I mean but luckily you
• 13:04
  Speaker 2: know short rounds cool and like we like him through
• 13:06
  Speaker 2: the whole movie so it's like counterbalances.
• 13:08
  Speaker 7: But even then like and I agree the second movie
• 13:11
  Speaker 7: was probably my least favorite out of the three But
• 13:16
  Speaker 7: even still, it takes you on this completely separate, unusual adventure.
• 13:23
  Speaker 2: And you're like, oh, yeah, all right. It's more of
• 13:25
  Speaker 2: a mystical outside of the Christian realm. I was about
• 13:29
  Speaker 2: to say, they're all mystical, really. Outside of the Christian realm.
• 13:32
  Speaker 2: But this one's, yeah, not so religious-y in our traditional terms.
• 13:36
  Speaker 7: But it's still a traditional, mystical thing.
• 13:40
  Speaker 2: Whereas this fourth movie is more.
• 13:44
  Speaker 2: New Age. It leaves that, yeah. New Age-y.
• 13:47
  Speaker 7: And I don't have a problem with that in particular,
• 13:50
  Speaker 7: but there's no dynamics between any of the characters that
• 13:57
  Speaker 7: revolve around that as a thing.
• 13:59
  Speaker 2: I mean, it's just, there's no talk about that as
• 14:02
  Speaker 2: a history. It's this whole new thing. Well, and it's
• 14:04
  Speaker 2: said for a long time. That's not archaeology.
• 14:06
  Speaker 5: Nobody has changed and become a new person. They've gone
• 14:10
  Speaker 5: through these crazy experiences, and yet they're like, Their reactions
• 14:16
  Speaker 5: are all way before.
• 14:19
  Speaker 7: There's no change in the characters based on this incredible information.
• 14:25
  Speaker 5: It's devolved.
• 14:25
  Speaker 2: I'm okay with Indy, though, because I feel like he's
• 14:28
  Speaker 2: already at that point from the time we meet. Sure.
• 14:31
  Speaker 2: He's already seen. And I think that's what I have
• 14:34
  Speaker 2: a problem with. And I think what has caused the
• 14:37
  Speaker 2: problem with this bigger picture is because we only have
• 14:40
  Speaker 2: these four stories. Outside of that, because I remember even
• 14:43
  Speaker 2: as a kid, as soon as that first one, maybe
• 14:46
  Speaker 2: even before Temple of Doom, I started getting the Marvel comics.
• 14:50
  Speaker 2: And Marvel did a whole run. And every issue is
• 14:53
  Speaker 2: another crazy adventure. Every issue is another thing he's looking for.
• 14:57
  Speaker 2: He's in a different country. He's got other people that
• 14:59
  Speaker 2: he's hanging out with. So he has all of these adventures.
• 15:02
  Speaker 2: So then they started doing the little paperback novels. They've
• 15:05
  Speaker 2: done role-playing games. They've done all these adventures together. Indiana
• 15:09
  Speaker 2: Jones and like you take all of that into this
• 15:11
  Speaker 2: mythology and to me then it's okay to throw in
• 15:15
  Speaker 2: oh this one he's freaking fighting aliens you know like
• 15:17
  Speaker 2: you can have when you have so much stuff thrown
• 15:20
  Speaker 2: that he's gone through over the years it kind of
• 15:23
  Speaker 2: works when we've only got these four stories and this
• 15:26
  Speaker 2: one really sticks out like I think that's part of
• 15:29
  Speaker 2: the problem too yeah I wanted more stories from Indy
• 15:32
  Speaker 2: and all we got were these four Which makes it
• 15:35
  Speaker 2: hard to shove this fourth one in.
• 15:37
  Speaker 5: Also, there's so many interesting things that they could have
• 15:39
  Speaker 5: touched on that had nothing to do with aliens.
• 15:42
  Speaker 2: I think that would have been, and I've said this
• 15:44
  Speaker 2: for years, I was like, that I still thought was
• 15:46
  Speaker 2: an interesting open. I think it would have been really
• 15:49
  Speaker 2: cool to sort of do that open. find out that
• 15:52
  Speaker 2: Indiana Jones was there for the area 51 thing and
• 15:57
  Speaker 2: then be like, all right. And then they just don't
• 15:59
  Speaker 2: mention it again. It's just like, that's the mythology of
• 16:02
  Speaker 2: Indiana Jones. It like, cause he also as watching this,
• 16:05
  Speaker 2: I'm like, he's also, especially if you take into account the,
• 16:08
  Speaker 2: like the TV series, like he's just Forrest Gump.
• 16:12
  Speaker 3: He is, yes.
• 16:12
  Speaker 2: He's just come in contact with everybody in history.
• 16:15
  Speaker 5: He just ends up in these crazy situations.
• 16:16
  Speaker 2: Which on this fourth one, he's like, I rode with
• 16:18
  Speaker 2: Pancho Villa, like he ran into Hitler, like you name it.
• 16:21
  Speaker 2: Like he's met everybody over the years. So like that
• 16:24
  Speaker 2: also would have worked really well, but we don't get
• 16:27
  Speaker 2: enough of that either to make this like part of
• 16:29
  Speaker 2: who he is. I don't know. I wanted, that's what
• 16:33
  Speaker 2: I think has always been a disappointment is I wanted
• 16:35
  Speaker 2: more Indiana Jones stories. The option I think would have
• 16:40
  Speaker 2: been kind of interesting because it's like, well, we're not
• 16:43
  Speaker 2: going to talk Harrison Ford into it. People were taking
• 16:46
  Speaker 2: issue with even trying to think of recasting that role.
• 16:50
  Speaker 2: So what if, well, I was going to go with like,
• 16:53
  Speaker 2: they've done so well in some other series of like
• 16:58
  Speaker 2: doing an animated series. You might be able to have
• 17:01
  Speaker 2: talked him into doing like voiceover work. And you could
• 17:03
  Speaker 2: knock out so many different... Stuff that's not kiddy. Like
• 17:07
  Speaker 2: they did with the Clone Wars. Yeah, Clone Wars or
• 17:10
  Speaker 2: the DC that are PG-13 versions of these that are
• 17:14
  Speaker 2: not at all meant for kids.
• 17:15
  Speaker 5: I can't just go for... I mean, I may be
• 17:17
  Speaker 5: totally off base, but for some reason, I don't care
• 17:21
  Speaker 5: about animated series a lot. There are some things that
• 17:25
  Speaker 5: I enjoy.
• 17:26
  Speaker 2: Watch the table.
• 17:27
  Speaker 5: Sorry, the table. But I know Clone Wars was good.
• 17:32
  Speaker 5: I know there's things that are good, but there's nothing
• 17:34
  Speaker 5: like humans doing the action. And that's just, I'll just.
• 17:39
  Speaker 2: Throw that in. Now we're getting back to reality, though.
• 17:42
  Speaker 2: Is the character worth having more stories?
• 17:45
  Speaker 4: Yes.
• 17:45
  Speaker 2: Is there a bigger story? Yes, there's a bigger story.
• 17:48
  Speaker 2: It's a bigger story than even Harrison Ford. And that's
• 17:51
  Speaker 2: the part everybody wants to fight on. It's like, well,
• 17:52
  Speaker 2: there can't be another Indiana Jones. I'm like, I think
• 17:54
  Speaker 2: Indiana Jones, the character, is way more important than just, oh,
• 17:59
  Speaker 2: we can't make any more movies.
• 18:00
  Speaker 5: I think that's fine, but I think Shia LaBeouf was
• 18:03
  Speaker 5: like stunt casting from the beginning, right? Like, you can
• 18:07
  Speaker 5: find somebody that conveys the same things. Right, and he
• 18:12
  Speaker 5: was not the guy.
• 18:14
  Speaker 2: There's our roundabout. Again, I still kind of just want
• 18:18
  Speaker 2: to look at that weird fourth movie anyway. But what
• 18:21
  Speaker 2: is our go-to? Can we find... And then we have
• 18:24
  Speaker 2: several ways about it.
• 18:25
  Speaker 7: If there is a fifth movie?
• 18:27
  Speaker 2: Well, if we go back in time and cast it
• 18:30
  Speaker 2: at the time, who would you choose? And then if
• 18:33
  Speaker 2: we have a fifth movie and we still think this
• 18:35
  Speaker 2: Mutt character is going to be hanging around, now do
• 18:39
  Speaker 2: we still have Shia hanging around? Or do we give
• 18:43
  Speaker 2: it to somebody else?
• 18:44
  Speaker 5: I would like it better if it was a... As
• 18:46
  Speaker 5: a woman, I think it would be cool if they
• 18:49
  Speaker 5: had had a daughter.
• 18:51
  Speaker 2: I thought that too. I started when I ran out
• 18:53
  Speaker 2: of casting.
• 18:54
  Speaker 5: And then she didn't like end up on the side
• 18:56
  Speaker 5: of like a Laura Croft, but was more like her mom. Right.
• 19:01
  Speaker 5: And took that character further.
• 19:04
  Speaker 2: I was trying to come up with different casting. And again,
• 19:08
  Speaker 2: I started landing on young actresses more. And I was like, well,
• 19:11
  Speaker 2: now we're totally taking a different direction.
• 19:12
  Speaker 5: Well, who'd you find?
• 19:14
  Speaker 2: I don't know. What have you got for... Well, I mean,
• 19:17
  Speaker 2: I guess I had never... If we don't get to
• 19:18
  Speaker 2: that point, like... if we're still recasting Mutt, essentially, where
• 19:24
  Speaker 2: do we go with him? Here was mine, and this
• 19:28
  Speaker 2: would have been.
• 19:28
  Speaker 5: I do like Ansel Eggort. I think he's good. But
• 19:31
  Speaker 5: you can't now because of.
• 19:34
  Speaker 2: The whole... whatever.
• 19:37
  Speaker 5: Like, Daniel Glover was great in that movie. I mean,
• 19:41
  Speaker 5: he was genius. They were both so good. That whole
• 19:45
  Speaker 5: movie was good. I know people hate it, but I
• 19:46
  Speaker 5: love it.
• 19:48
  Speaker 2: Um in a in a different world here's the perfect
• 19:52
  Speaker 2: casting choice in a different world where things didn't happen
• 19:55
  Speaker 2: the way they did assuming we got around to the
• 19:58
  Speaker 2: casting time for the fourth movie and you bring in
• 20:01
  Speaker 2: a son played by river phoenix I think that's perfect
• 20:05
  Speaker 2: because not only is he a great actor, but hey, coincidentally,
• 20:09
  Speaker 2: he looks just like Indy did when he was a kid.
• 20:11
  Speaker 2: It would so make sense.
• 20:12
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean, that totally makes sense. But I thought
• 20:14
  Speaker 5: we were talking about before that, because if you're casting
• 20:16
  Speaker 5: from that time, then.
• 20:18
  Speaker 2: Well, I'm saying had again, unfortunately, River's not with us anymore.
• 20:22
  Speaker 2: Had that not happened, we get to like an older
• 20:25
  Speaker 2: because that's the thing. Maybe they're playing Mutt a little
• 20:28
  Speaker 2: too young. I would kind of like to see him
• 20:30
  Speaker 2: played up a little, again, older and a little smarter
• 20:33
  Speaker 2: so that he could actually be somebody that you would
• 20:36
  Speaker 2: want to hang out with Indy. And if down the
• 20:38
  Speaker 2: line you give him his own movie to take over
• 20:41
  Speaker 2: the franchise, like that's somebody who would be worth investing
• 20:45
  Speaker 2: time in. Not really what we see on the screen.
• 20:49
  Speaker 2: I was looking at the Teen Choice Awards for 2008
• 20:52
  Speaker 2: when that movie came out. Interesting. That's kind of where
• 20:55
  Speaker 2: I wanted to go. Let me see.
• 20:58
  Speaker 7: Well, so the other ways that that could have gone,
• 21:02
  Speaker 7: so the choice movie action actor was Shia LaBeouf in
• 21:08
  Speaker 7: Indiana Jones and the Kingdom.
• 21:09
  Speaker 2: Of the Crystal Skull as Mutt Williams. However, the choice
• 21:13
  Speaker 2: movie action, the.
• 21:16
  Speaker 7: Movie was Chronicles of Narnia, which, interestingly enough, starred William Mosley.
• 21:26
  Speaker 2: Which I think would have been an interesting alternative for
• 21:28
  Speaker 2: that role.
• 21:28
  Speaker 5: I can't even think of what he was in. However, now.
• 21:30
  Speaker 2: He was in Chronicles of Narnia.
• 21:32
  Speaker 5: The Chronicles of what?
• 21:34
  Speaker 2: Narnia!
• 21:35
  Speaker 5: I think if you look at now, I would say
• 21:38
  Speaker 5: that wolf kid.
• 21:41
  Speaker 2: Ah, he's in everything.
• 21:43
  Speaker 5: But he's good.
• 21:44
  Speaker 2: I mean, he's... As long as you don't want to
• 21:47
  Speaker 2: like him in the turning. Having just done a turning episode. Man,
• 21:52
  Speaker 2: he is an obnoxious child in that movie. But he's
• 21:55
  Speaker 2: supposed to be. It's not his fault. He's still a
• 21:57
  Speaker 2: good actor. Like a good actor.
• 21:58
  Speaker 5: I think he's a decent actor. That's the thing about
• 22:03
  Speaker 5: the cast of Stranger Things. They are all solid.
• 22:07
  Speaker 2: Well, again, that's recently what I said. If you're casting
• 22:11
  Speaker 2: up-and-coming young actors now, you're basically pulling from the cast
• 22:14
  Speaker 2: of Stranger Things or the cast of it. And sometimes both.
• 22:18
  Speaker 5: This guy is just like a dime store Brad Pitt.
• 22:21
  Speaker 5: If I could cast anybody for that role, then I'd
• 22:24
  Speaker 5: cast like a young, very young Brad Pitt.
• 22:26
  Speaker 2: Wouldn't you want that as your Mutt?
• 22:29
  Speaker 6: I don't know.
• 22:30
  Speaker 5: No. No, I don't want.
• 22:32
  Speaker 2: That's the thing. That's the thing. We have to decide,
• 22:33
  Speaker 2: are we keeping Mutt character as he is? I thought
• 22:36
  Speaker 2: that was the question. Yeah, essentially. But if we're going idealistically,
• 22:42
  Speaker 2: it would also be rewriting at that point too. Oh,
• 22:44
  Speaker 2: well then in that case. Yeah. Oh, that's rough. But
• 22:47
  Speaker 2: we still have to answer the question. Get rid of Mutt.
• 22:49
  Speaker 2: Go ahead.
• 22:50
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 22:50
  Speaker 2: Just get rid of Mutt.
• 22:52
  Speaker 5: That's the easy answer.
• 22:53
  Speaker 6: I don't know.
• 22:54
  Speaker 5: You know, I think there's something to be said for
• 22:56
  Speaker 5: interesting people. And that was my whole topic that I
• 22:59
  Speaker 5: was saying. I'm tired of the person that's the pretty
• 23:04
  Speaker 5: choice because God knows.
• 23:07
  Speaker 2: Well, it's not about that.
• 23:08
  Speaker 5: The pretty choice is not the interesting choice.
• 23:10
  Speaker 7: I mean, we can certainly, I think we could probably
• 23:12
  Speaker 7: agree that the fact that Karen Allen and Harrison Ford
• 23:18
  Speaker 7: having this... Not the actors, but the characters of Indiana
• 23:24
  Speaker 7: Jones and.
• 23:26
  Speaker 1: Marion.
• 23:26
  Speaker 2: Marion. Having a child together as a vehicle for the
• 23:31
  Speaker 2: story is totally not necessary. I mean, we can... completely
• 23:39
  Speaker 2: omit that i mean.
• 23:40
  Speaker 5: I love that i kind of like that idea.
• 23:42
  Speaker 2: Do we work marion back in or not yeah because
• 23:45
  Speaker 2: you if we're just telling this story about him meeting
• 23:47
  Speaker 2: a young kid that like is also interested in all
• 23:50
  Speaker 2: this stuff which is not but if we're just trying
• 23:53
  Speaker 2: to really like find him someone else younger to hang
• 23:55
  Speaker 2: out with and.
• 23:56
  Speaker 7: Yeah but wait a minute because it doesn't have to
• 23:58
  Speaker 7: be because doesn't she also know that the guy uh
• 24:03
  Speaker 7: that they're looking after She's affiliated with him too somehow.
• 24:09
  Speaker 2: So you don't really need the young kid. That's one
• 24:10
  Speaker 2: of those that's oddly written. Because I never figured out
• 24:14
  Speaker 2: what the deal was with them. Because that's not even
• 24:16
  Speaker 2: who his... Like... And admittedly, it's been a while since
• 24:20
  Speaker 2: I've seen it, so I can't really remember. But just
• 24:22
  Speaker 2: watching it, I'm like, in the middle, I'm like, okay,
• 24:25
  Speaker 2: I guess she's with that guy now that they're looking for.
• 24:27
  Speaker 2: And he's become like either, if not her new husband,
• 24:30
  Speaker 2: he's become who she's with now. Because Mutt kind of
• 24:32
  Speaker 2: looks at him almost like a father figure. So I'm like, okay,
• 24:35
  Speaker 2: this is his new stepdad. But then later they get
• 24:37
  Speaker 2: to a whole nother guy that like Indiana Jones knew
• 24:41
  Speaker 2: and introduced her to who became her husband later. and
• 24:43
  Speaker 2: became the stepdad for Mutt, who is not John Hurt.
• 24:46
  Speaker 2: So I'm just like, well, then what is the weird... Again,
• 24:49
  Speaker 2: it's like awkward writing. I'm like, why bother introducing this
• 24:53
  Speaker 2: character if he's not going to be that role, but
• 24:55
  Speaker 2: playing him like he is?
• 24:56
  Speaker 7: And I don't even think you need that mechanism to
• 25:00
  Speaker 7: bring them together.
• 25:01
  Speaker 2: You don't. You just don't. They know each other from
• 25:04
  Speaker 2: the past. You can just come together.
• 25:06
  Speaker 5: Wait, I do love that idea, though. Like, that plays
• 25:09
  Speaker 5: to the female fan... You know, of the idea of, like,
• 25:15
  Speaker 5: Indy and Mary had a child.
• 25:18
  Speaker 2: Okay. Right?
• 25:19
  Speaker 5: Like, it does. And it's not written for.
• 25:22
  Speaker 2: I'll take your word for it.
• 25:23
  Speaker 5: I don't know. That story was not written for, like,
• 25:25
  Speaker 5: young kids that are finding a thing. It was written
• 25:28
  Speaker 5: for our, like.
• 25:31
  Speaker 2: Yes. Well, again, it... proves what a strong character she was,
• 25:35
  Speaker 2: that that's who they chose. It's not like he and
• 25:37
  Speaker 2: Willie Scott had a child together. Because nobody wants to
• 25:39
  Speaker 2: see that.
• 25:40
  Speaker 5: Obviously, she got rid of that.
• 25:41
  Speaker 2: He got rid of that. The weird Nazi girl that
• 25:43
  Speaker 2: he hooks up with in the third one. Also, she's dead.
• 25:46
  Speaker 2: But that aside.
• 25:47
  Speaker 5: And my whole timeline is off on it.
• 25:49
  Speaker 6: Is she dead?
• 25:49
  Speaker 2: I'm pretty sure she dies at the end of the
• 25:51
  Speaker 2: third one.
• 25:52
  Speaker 5: So my whole timeline is off. Oh, not in real life.
• 25:55
  Speaker 2: I don't even know in real life.
• 25:56
  Speaker 5: Elsa Schneider. of course so wait a minute but i
• 26:05
  Speaker 5: think that the.
• 26:06
  Speaker 2: Middle give me your other hand girl.
• 26:08
  Speaker 5: The middle movie i can reach it is is like
• 26:13
  Speaker 5: the middle movie is before that right like.
• 26:15
  Speaker 2: That's temple of doom is a prequel to.
• 26:18
  Speaker 5: Raiders right so yeah.
• 26:20
  Speaker 2: But like by like a year so time wise it
• 26:23
  Speaker 2: shouldn't make much difference.
• 26:24
  Speaker 5: But but yeah i thought it so we saw it
• 26:27
  Speaker 5: as raiders the last ark temple of the doom Whatever,
• 26:30
  Speaker 5: but it was technically time-wise.
• 26:32
  Speaker 2: And then he went on a crusade.
• 26:35
  Speaker 5: Temple of... Not Temple of the Doom.
• 26:37
  Speaker 2: Temple of the Dooms.
• 26:38
  Speaker 8: Oh, my God.
• 26:39
  Speaker 2: So, again, if we're sticking with the time period, I
• 26:44
  Speaker 2: was just... Since you brought up, that was a good reference,
• 26:47
  Speaker 2: the old Teen Choice Awards. So, I was trying to
• 26:50
  Speaker 2: see other people that were working at the time. So,
• 26:53
  Speaker 2: how about one of the... One of the people nominated,
• 26:57
  Speaker 2: he might have been a presenter that night. How about
• 26:59
  Speaker 2: we work in Jonah Hill, son of Indiana Jones?
• 27:04
  Speaker 7: Okay.
• 27:05
  Speaker 2: That's not bad. Wait a minute.
• 27:06
  Speaker 5: So if it's not an awesome daughter, then it can
• 27:09
  Speaker 5: be an incompetent chubby son.
• 27:12
  Speaker 2: So this has just become like a bumbling slapstick adventure now,
• 27:16
  Speaker 2: which it kind of is anyway. Yeah, I mean it
• 27:18
  Speaker 2: is anyway. At many moments. It is. I'm sorry. Go ahead.
• 27:23
  Speaker 5: No.
• 27:24
  Speaker 2: How about Zac Efron?
• 27:26
  Speaker 5: I don't know.
• 27:28
  Speaker 2: It would be equally as bad. I think he's actually
• 27:32
  Speaker 2: turned out to be a pretty solid actor. So, I
• 27:34
  Speaker 2: think given the two, I think at, I don't know,
• 27:37
  Speaker 2: at the time.
• 27:38
  Speaker 5: I mean, you might as well make Justin Bieber.
• 27:40
  Speaker 2: No, he wasn't or ever going to be talented. But,
• 27:44
  Speaker 2: I do think Efron is like a pretty solid actor now.
• 27:48
  Speaker 2: He's grown up and is kind of, has potential. But,
• 27:53
  Speaker 2: if you threw him in there in the middle of
• 27:55
  Speaker 2: high school musical era. I don't, maybe he wouldn't have
• 27:58
  Speaker 2: done much else with it. I don't know. That's the
• 28:00
  Speaker 2: other thing I was going to say. It's funny at
• 28:02
  Speaker 2: the time, how much people hated Shia LaBeouf. Now, in
• 28:08
  Speaker 2: the art house scene, he is super respected. I still
• 28:11
  Speaker 2: don't like him. He is making really different movies. really
• 28:14
  Speaker 2: different choices, and has become really well-respected in that world.
• 28:19
  Speaker 2: He's still not a marketable mainstream name and probably never
• 28:22
  Speaker 2: will be again.
• 28:23
  Speaker 5: He just makes him another... Who was the guy that
• 28:26
  Speaker 5: was in Buffalo 66?
• 28:29
  Speaker 2: Vincent Gallo?
• 28:30
  Speaker 5: Yep. He's just another Vincent Gallo.
• 28:34
  Speaker 2: Did Vincent Gallo become anything? Why did Buffalo 66... Like,
• 28:37
  Speaker 2: outside of a couple of movies back then... He did
• 28:39
  Speaker 2: a lot of.
• 28:40
  Speaker 5: That's a good movie.
• 28:41
  Speaker 2: He's not become a lasting.
• 28:42
  Speaker 5: That's an arthouse movie.
• 28:43
  Speaker 2: He has, but again, I don't, I mean that he
• 28:46
  Speaker 2: had a few moments there, but in the long run,
• 28:49
  Speaker 2: I don't think he's, he's proven himself as a, as
• 28:53
  Speaker 2: a lasting performer.
• 28:55
  Speaker 5: I don't know that Shia LaBeouf has.
• 28:57
  Speaker 2: I don't know that Shia, he definitely didn't at the time.
• 28:59
  Speaker 2: I don't know if, if he would have, if that
• 29:03
  Speaker 2: wouldn't have happened, because that was almost the beginning of
• 29:05
  Speaker 2: the end for him.
• 29:06
  Speaker 5: Right.
• 29:07
  Speaker 2: Like up until that point, he's, he's knocking out Transformer
• 29:10
  Speaker 2: movies and, making tons of money at the box office.
• 29:12
  Speaker 2: So had this role not come along, would he have
• 29:16
  Speaker 2: continued on as a super successful actor, not gone in
• 29:20
  Speaker 2: his crazy ass meltdown and then turned his life around
• 29:23
  Speaker 2: to be a successful art house actor? Did, did this
• 29:26
  Speaker 2: movie fix his life?
• 29:27
  Speaker 5: That's the excuse. People who can't.
• 29:30
  Speaker 2: You're far away.
• 29:32
  Speaker 5: Art house.
• 29:34
  Speaker 2: If, if Ryan Philippe had been 10 years younger, there
• 29:37
  Speaker 2: we go. That's actually, he would have been the right guy. Again,
• 29:40
  Speaker 2: he is a solid actor. I would be up for that. Really?
• 29:42
  Speaker 2: I don't like him. Really? You don't like anybody. He's blonde.
• 29:45
  Speaker 2: So is Shia LaBeouf. Yeah, well, Shia LaBeouf is a
• 29:48
  Speaker 2: jerk here. He's a brunette. Is he? Yeah. Are you sure?
• 29:52
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 29:55
  Speaker 2: Are we sure about that? Yes. How about Emile Hirsch
• 29:58
  Speaker 2: from Speed Racer? Also nominated that year. Huh. I mean,
• 30:04
  Speaker 2: a better option at the time. I never saw Speed Racer. But, again,
• 30:09
  Speaker 2: I still don't know that he would have. Wait a minute.
• 30:11
  Speaker 5: What else was he in?
• 30:13
  Speaker 2: Hell. Oh, Josh Hartnett. Josh Hartnett. That would have been it.
• 30:20
  Speaker 5: Josh.
• 30:20
  Speaker 2: At the time, I could definitely see that happening. Again,
• 30:24
  Speaker 2: I don't know if it would have turned out better.
• 30:26
  Speaker 5: Wait, who are we talking about Emile Hirsch for?
• 30:29
  Speaker 2: I kind of like him as that, actually.
• 30:31
  Speaker 5: Emile Hirsch is just like a skinny Jack Black. But
• 30:34
  Speaker 5: not as funny.
• 30:35
  Speaker 2: He was in the autopsy of Jane Doe. Previous episode.
• 30:39
  Speaker 2: Which is a pretty good movie. And he was alright
• 30:42
  Speaker 2: in it.
• 30:42
  Speaker 5: He was into the wild, the girls next door, freaks,
• 30:45
  Speaker 5: alpha dog. Once Upon a Time in Hollywood. I don't
• 30:51
  Speaker 5: remember him in Once Upon a Time.
• 30:52
  Speaker 2: Which is a great film. that is i really really
• 30:56
  Speaker 2: like the but i don't know yeah like at the
• 31:00
  Speaker 2: time i don't know if he would have been ready
• 31:03
  Speaker 2: for that kuiper role i don't know but i mean
• 31:06
  Speaker 2: he took on speed racer which was another huge budget
• 31:10
  Speaker 2: crazy special effects level like never saw it how did
• 31:14
  Speaker 2: it go wait how was it let me say this
• 31:17
  Speaker 2: he runs in a circle in a car it's really
• 31:19
  Speaker 2: fast this is a.
• 31:21
  Speaker 7: Circle Doesn't he like fly through the air?
• 31:28
  Speaker 2: I know he's a demon on wheels. Is there a
• 31:31
  Speaker 2: monkey in that one? I think there is. I think
• 31:34
  Speaker 2: there's a CG monkey. If not, in my head, there's
• 31:37
  Speaker 2: a CG monkey involved. But I'm pretty sure there is, actually. Well, anyway.
• 31:43
  Speaker 7: I don't know that you need the character Mutt.
• 31:48
  Speaker 2: Alright, back to our previous, if we're If we're switching
• 31:52
  Speaker 2: it up and they had a daughter, we're looking at
• 31:54
  Speaker 2: the drama choices here. Actually, the winner that year, not
• 31:59
  Speaker 2: a bad option. Keira Knightley. Solid actress. Could totally hold
• 32:06
  Speaker 2: her own with Harrison Ford, I feel like. would be
• 32:09
  Speaker 2: a really strong woman to put into a role like that.
• 32:12
  Speaker 2: I can kind of see her climbing around in tombs. Yeah,
• 32:14
  Speaker 2: she's not generic. Yeah, she's, and also, like, she's not super, like,
• 32:17
  Speaker 2: she can look great in a period piece like Atonement,
• 32:20
  Speaker 2: but I totally can see her climbing around in a
• 32:22
  Speaker 2: tomb and being able to hold her own in that, too.
• 32:25
  Speaker 2: So I think, not a terrible idea. That's not a
• 32:27
  Speaker 2: terrible idea. I think that would have been a great... I.
• 32:31
  Speaker 5: Mean, I just get so sick of the idea of, like,
• 32:33
  Speaker 5: they automatically assume that, you know, the strong male has
• 32:37
  Speaker 5: a son.
• 32:38
  Speaker 2: Right. Right, right. That was the.
• 32:41
  Speaker 5: Best thing about Lara Croft. It's like, she's a woman.
• 32:44
  Speaker 7: And that's exactly what I was going to say. Had
• 32:47
  Speaker 7: Indy had a daughter, it would have been a Lara
• 32:49
  Speaker 7: Croft-esque kind of character.
• 32:51
  Speaker 5: But they could have made her charming and more like
• 32:55
  Speaker 5: her mom, but also like him.
• 32:58
  Speaker 2: It would have been a nice blend of the two.
• 33:00
  Speaker 5: So there's a video game that we've played and I
• 33:02
  Speaker 5: keep going back to and I love, and it's called
• 33:05
  Speaker 5: Event Horizon, right? No. Or just Horizons.
• 33:09
  Speaker 2: Horizon Zero Dawn.
• 33:09
  Speaker 5: Horizon Zero Dawn.
• 33:11
  Speaker 2: That's a movie.
• 33:14
  Speaker 5: Horizon Zero Dawn. And the protagonist is like a girl.
• 33:19
  Speaker 5: And it starts off and she's just like a young girl.
• 33:22
  Speaker 5: And it's not like over-boobed or anything. And you kind
• 33:27
  Speaker 5: of like.
• 33:29
  Speaker 2: Do you think, again, now we're factoring in more of
• 33:32
  Speaker 2: the real world, as they're writing this story, do you
• 33:35
  Speaker 2: think they're... They don't want to do that because we're
• 33:37
  Speaker 2: coming off of a series of Tomb Raider movies that
• 33:42
  Speaker 2: turned out not super successful by that second one. So
• 33:45
  Speaker 2: they totally scrapped the whole series. So they're like, well,
• 33:47
  Speaker 2: we don't want to be like Tomb Raider.
• 33:49
  Speaker 7: But the video game series that followed it was extremely successful.
• 33:53
  Speaker 2: I mean, it was always successful. But movies and video
• 33:57
  Speaker 2: games don't always mix up.
• 33:58
  Speaker 5: It was the idea that she was doing the same thing.
• 34:00
  Speaker 5: But I think that you could have made.
• 34:02
  Speaker 2: I did like the movie.
• 34:04
  Speaker 5: I did too. I thought the first one was really good.
• 34:06
  Speaker 2: It was fun. I liked the last Tomb Raider film.
• 34:09
  Speaker 2: Also starring Daniel Craig.
• 34:12
  Speaker 5: He was in that, that's right. But so was what's-his-face
• 34:14
  Speaker 5: that I can't stand. The guy with the arms and
• 34:16
  Speaker 5: the legs.
• 34:17
  Speaker 2: You're of no use.
• 34:19
  Speaker 5: No, Gerard Butler. Who's like a vaguely, like, congratulations, you're
• 34:26
  Speaker 5: attractive for a Scottish man.
• 34:30
  Speaker 2: That's offensive. Sorry, Scottish guys.
• 34:32
  Speaker 5: No, I'm just saying, you know, like that was his
• 34:35
  Speaker 5: selling point. He's like, oh, I'm a Scot. And it's like, congratulations.
• 34:40
  Speaker 5: Like there's plenty of you.
• 34:41
  Speaker 2: You were born a place.
• 34:42
  Speaker 5: You were born a place. There's plenty of other people
• 34:44
  Speaker 5: who are attractive who are also Scottish. That sounded terrible,
• 34:50
  Speaker 5: but I meant that as a slight to him and
• 34:52
  Speaker 5: not to Scottish men.
• 34:55
  Speaker 6: Oh, Lord.
• 34:56
  Speaker 5: I love Ireland and Scotland. Two independent places. But that
• 35:03
  Speaker 5: would have, you know, kind of been a callback to
• 35:06
  Speaker 5: like a bunch of girls who.
• 35:09
  Speaker 2: I don't have a problem. I do almost think maybe
• 35:12
  Speaker 2: that could have factored in. I don't know. Cause also
• 35:15
  Speaker 2: it's written by, it's still co-written by Lucas and Lucas
• 35:19
  Speaker 2: was probably out of the loop at that point. So
• 35:21
  Speaker 2: I don't know that he was even paying attention to
• 35:23
  Speaker 2: Laura Croft as a project.
• 35:24
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 35:24
  Speaker 5: But I think it goes back to the idea of
• 35:26
  Speaker 5: what we were talking about in like recasting battle of
• 35:28
  Speaker 5: the planets where it's like, are you casting for big bucks?
• 35:31
  Speaker 5: Are you making it, So it.
• 35:34
  Speaker 2: Should be an unknown actress.
• 35:36
  Speaker 5: According to Paul, it should be an unknown actress.
• 35:39
  Speaker 2: Absolutely.
• 35:40
  Speaker 5: Or someone who identifies as an unknown actress.
• 35:44
  Speaker 2: That's what it takes now.
• 35:45
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean, you know, whatever, man.
• 35:47
  Speaker 2: As long as I don't know who you are, you're
• 35:50
  Speaker 2: an unknown actor.
• 35:51
  Speaker 5: Life is too hard. You can be whatever you want.
• 35:53
  Speaker 2: Give those unknown people a chance.
• 35:56
  Speaker 5: Just be the best unknown whatever it is you are
• 35:58
  Speaker 5: that you can be.
• 35:59
  Speaker 7: Yeah, until you're known, and then you're in, you suck.
• 36:02
  Speaker 2: The gig is up.
• 36:04
  Speaker 7: Then we don't want to see you in anything else,
• 36:06
  Speaker 7: you damn successful actor.
• 36:07
  Speaker 5: I don't care what you are, we moved on.
• 36:11
  Speaker 2: So, this is actually a wealth of useful information here
• 36:16
  Speaker 2: from 2008. How about we're throwing in other actors of
• 36:20
  Speaker 2: the day? How about a young Channing Tatum?
• 36:24
  Speaker 4: No.
• 36:24
  Speaker 5: No.
• 36:25
  Speaker 2: He's a potato.
• 36:25
  Speaker 5: Channing Potato. He was great in the.
• 36:30
  Speaker 2: It could have gone equally wrong. Although, also up that
• 36:35
  Speaker 2: year is Jake Gyllenhaal. Now, that's got potential, depending on how.
• 36:41
  Speaker 5: He's prior to Channing Tatum. His career is pre-Channing Tatum.
• 36:47
  Speaker 2: They're both nominated the same year, though.
• 36:48
  Speaker 5: They may be nominated.
• 36:49
  Speaker 2: As dramatic actor. For what? For... The role of Mutt?
• 36:56
  Speaker 5: Well, we're talking about different actors.
• 37:00
  Speaker 2: Wait a minute.
• 37:01
  Speaker 5: That's what he was nominated for. We're talking about him
• 37:04
  Speaker 5: for Mutt.
• 37:05
  Speaker 7: Yes.
• 37:05
  Speaker 5: No.
• 37:06
  Speaker 2: You're not talking about him for Mutt.
• 37:07
  Speaker 5: I'm not accepting him as Mutt.
• 37:09
  Speaker 2: I threw it out there as an option because he's
• 37:11
  Speaker 2: there at the same time as a young actor. Tobey Maguire. No,
• 37:15
  Speaker 2: you can't. I'm kidding.
• 37:17
  Speaker 8: I'm kidding.
• 37:18
  Speaker 2: I'm joking.
• 37:19
  Speaker 5: So Tobey Maguire, let me... please fill us in advance
• 37:24
  Speaker 5: to the toby mcguire circa.
• 37:26
  Speaker 2: Go ahead two spaces to the toby mcguire oh it's.
• 37:29
  Speaker 5: Like a paragraph it's like a page we can go
• 37:31
  Speaker 5: three pages.
• 37:32
  Speaker 7: Ahead playing the hollywood board game move ahead two spaces
• 37:35
  Speaker 7: for toby mcguire have.
• 37:37
  Speaker 5: You never mind there's hollywood squares hour.
• 37:41
  Speaker 2: All right is this like old-timey version yeah yeah.
• 37:44
  Speaker 5: Like it's on like the crazy game show network which
• 37:48
  Speaker 5: is genius um So we were talking about Tobey Maguire,
• 37:53
  Speaker 5: circa Spider-Man, would have made the perfect Morty for Rick
• 37:59
  Speaker 5: and Morty.
• 37:59
  Speaker 2: We haven't gotten there yet.
• 38:01
  Speaker 5: I know.
• 38:01
  Speaker 2: At this point, we're going so long, that's going to
• 38:03
  Speaker 2: be its own episode. So remember that later, and you'll
• 38:06
  Speaker 2: probably forget it.
• 38:08
  Speaker 5: No, let's go on to that. Let's talk about that.
• 38:10
  Speaker 5: Because that is kind of on my mind.
• 38:11
  Speaker 2: We have absolutely nothing.
• 38:13
  Speaker 8: Yeah, I mean, I don't know.
• 38:14
  Speaker 5: I have nothing to offer because I think that that
• 38:16
  Speaker 5: movie was totally screwed up.
• 38:19
  Speaker 2: Then let's round out with that. Because we've run through...
• 38:21
  Speaker 2: There's also Mark Wahlberg at that. I mean, you can't...
• 38:26
  Speaker 2: What if you threw Mark Wahlberg in this?
• 38:28
  Speaker 5: That character was totally unnecessary.
• 38:31
  Speaker 2: That's my whole thing. That becomes the issue. But that's
• 38:34
  Speaker 2: why I'm saying I think part of that problem is
• 38:39
  Speaker 2: because we didn't have anything else. We put so much pressure.
• 38:42
  Speaker 2: It was such a long time getting to that fourth
• 38:45
  Speaker 2: movie that... That we had all this buildup of like,
• 38:48
  Speaker 2: we love the original trilogy and we want more. And
• 38:50
  Speaker 2: then like, I don't know. Like at that point, I
• 38:54
  Speaker 2: don't know if they could have delivered what we wanted.
• 38:57
  Speaker 2: It's the fandom menace of Indiana Jones movies. We waited
• 39:02
  Speaker 2: so long, no matter what they did, we wouldn't have
• 39:04
  Speaker 2: been happy with it.
• 39:05
  Speaker 5: And even if you go to the timeline, what's the
• 39:07
  Speaker 5: timeline of Raiders of the Lost Ark? What year is that?
• 39:10
  Speaker 2: As far as in story? Yep. It's like 35, something
• 39:18
  Speaker 2: like that.
• 39:25
  Speaker 5: Like, because that becomes a thing too. Like, I think
• 39:27
  Speaker 5: the age is totally off from.
• 39:29
  Speaker 2: No, it's like 20 years difference. It's like, well, it's
• 39:33
  Speaker 2: the beginning of the 30s versus the end of the 50s.
• 39:36
  Speaker 2: So it's closer to 30, really. Yeah.
• 39:40
  Speaker 5: Like, that's the hard thing I've not been able to
• 39:43
  Speaker 5: figure out.
• 39:44
  Speaker 2: People get old and you don't like it? Yeah. 1936
• 39:49
  Speaker 2: is when the Raiders.
• 39:50
  Speaker 5: Of the Lost Ark takes place. Okay, so when is.
• 39:53
  Speaker 2: Like, 57... 20 years. So there you go.
• 39:58
  Speaker 3: Okay.
• 40:00
  Speaker 2: And so what is it that was hanging? I have
• 40:03
  Speaker 2: no excuse. And a 1957 20-year-old basically looks like a
• 40:06
  Speaker 2: 40-year-old today. So, you know.
• 40:09
  Speaker 5: So you could have cast Robert Downey Jr.
• 40:10
  Speaker 2: Yeah, absolutely.
• 40:12
  Speaker 7: It's much.
• 40:13
  Speaker 2: I don't, that's the thing. I don't, I don't totally
• 40:18
  Speaker 2: have a problem with that type of character. Like, I,
• 40:21
  Speaker 2: it is interesting that like in the diner we get the, the,
• 40:25
  Speaker 2: greasers and the socials fighting each other. But I'm like,
• 40:28
  Speaker 2: obviously between those, like you feel like Indy would have
• 40:31
  Speaker 2: the greaser kid.
• 40:32
  Speaker 6: Right.
• 40:32
  Speaker 2: So like, I see, I think that's the problem with
• 40:35
  Speaker 2: this casting is it's not that it is that I
• 40:39
  Speaker 2: have problems with him as an actor, certainly at the time,
• 40:42
  Speaker 2: but also I don't think that actor fits the greaser
• 40:45
  Speaker 2: character that we have. So like, number one, I think
• 40:48
  Speaker 2: the greaser character who doesn't know what the hell's going
• 40:51
  Speaker 2: on in this Indiana Jones scenario is doesn't fit period.
• 40:55
  Speaker 2: But on top of that, I think the wrong casting
• 40:57
  Speaker 2: was Shia LaBeouf as this cool, tough guy who rides
• 41:01
  Speaker 2: in some like straight up, like Marlon Brando tribute as
• 41:05
  Speaker 2: he rolls in on the motorcycle. So I'm like, that's no,
• 41:09
  Speaker 2: I don't see. He's a bit too pretty boy for it. Oh,
• 41:12
  Speaker 2: not even that. He just doesn't have the weight to
• 41:14
  Speaker 2: be a tough guy.
• 41:15
  Speaker 7: Whereas, you know, if you gave it to somebody again
• 41:19
  Speaker 7: at that same year, Mark Wahlberg, like, I can at
• 41:22
  Speaker 7: least see him pulling off tough guy.
• 41:24
  Speaker 2: Again, I don't need him jammed in the middle of
• 41:26
  Speaker 2: my Indiana Jones adventure, but he would be a greaser
• 41:29
  Speaker 2: and be just fine at it. I don't know that
• 41:31
  Speaker 2: he looked 20, though. No. But that's the thing. But
• 41:34
  Speaker 2: he was up for an award that same year. But
• 41:36
  Speaker 2: that's the thing. I'm just pulling.
• 41:37
  Speaker 5: It's that whole idea of like, okay, we come from
• 41:41
  Speaker 5: the age where you're like, oh, people look way older
• 41:44
  Speaker 5: than they're supposed to be. And also... Shia LaBeouf, I'm sorry, like,
• 41:49
  Speaker 5: he was kind of fluff. Like, he doesn't have the
• 41:51
  Speaker 5: gravitas or the real raw whatever to be, like, smart
• 41:57
  Speaker 5: and street smart and gravelly, you know? I mean, that's
• 42:03
  Speaker 5: a thing. Like, you know that- Yeah.
• 42:06
  Speaker 2: Kind of road-worn personality.
• 42:09
  Speaker 5: That is the kind of child that they would have
• 42:11
  Speaker 5: unless she totally doted on him, which I don't think
• 42:14
  Speaker 5: she would. Which I don't want to have to go
• 42:15
  Speaker 5: that far into the relationship of what.
• 42:19
  Speaker 2: He was still young enough. I don't think he would
• 42:21
  Speaker 2: have been that hard yet, but he still should have
• 42:24
  Speaker 2: at least the basic persona that could pull off being
• 42:27
  Speaker 2: a greaser in the 50s, which he does not have.
• 42:30
  Speaker 2: If he's a biker at that point, I'm pretty sure.
• 42:34
  Speaker 2: But as young as he is, he couldn't have been
• 42:36
  Speaker 2: a biker. He still seems like he's putting on the
• 42:38
  Speaker 2: air of being a greaser. He's 20. No, no, no.
• 42:41
  Speaker 2: But he just dropped out of high school, so he's
• 42:43
  Speaker 2: only been doing it a couple years.
• 42:45
  Speaker 5: And he's also picked up the Marlon Brando thing. sure
• 42:49
  Speaker 5: vibe and you're like really is that is that a
• 42:54
  Speaker 5: thing for you because right you i don't even know
• 42:58
  Speaker 5: if you know that exists but like they would have
• 43:01
  Speaker 5: a smarter kid like that's your hope and your dream
• 43:04
  Speaker 5: that they would come up with like somebody who was
• 43:06
  Speaker 5: so clever and so raw that they would be like
• 43:09
  Speaker 5: i like like the indiana jones chronicles like he's smart that's.
• 43:13
  Speaker 2: Early again i like that a If you take the
• 43:16
  Speaker 2: little kid stories out, I think all of the ones
• 43:18
  Speaker 2: that he's a teenager is a really interesting story. It
• 43:22
  Speaker 2: does totally fit the character that Indy becomes.
• 43:25
  Speaker 5: And he keeps learning things throughout. And this is just
• 43:27
  Speaker 5: like a cocky dude. And you'd be like, your mom
• 43:30
  Speaker 5: and your dad would tell you you looked like shit
• 43:33
  Speaker 5: and you were.
• 43:34
  Speaker 2: See, that's why I think it would be interesting. So
• 43:37
  Speaker 2: in the options there in the diner, would it have
• 43:41
  Speaker 2: been more real? Because I say he would have a
• 43:43
  Speaker 2: greaser kid, but Equally as much he spends his time
• 43:46
  Speaker 2: in school. What if he had a little Soch kid
• 43:48
  Speaker 2: that was wearing a sweater vest and was actually just
• 43:51
  Speaker 2: really freaking smart? It would be way cooler. And had
• 43:53
  Speaker 2: spent every day in school the way... Again, Indy's kind
• 43:56
  Speaker 2: of 50-50. Like, he's super book smart, but he also
• 43:59
  Speaker 2: goes out in the world and, like, punches people in
• 44:01
  Speaker 2: the face. Where this kid hadn't gotten to that point yet.
• 44:03
  Speaker 2: So he'd spent all of his time... Whether or not
• 44:06
  Speaker 2: he knew Indy was his father, but, like, he was
• 44:08
  Speaker 2: thrown into that school environment from the beginning... becomes way
• 44:12
  Speaker 2: more nerdy, way more interested in the archaeological part of it,
• 44:16
  Speaker 2: learning the bookend of it, and then like, so that
• 44:19
  Speaker 2: would be kind of interesting too, is he finds out
• 44:22
  Speaker 2: he has this kid, he kind of wants him to
• 44:23
  Speaker 2: be a rough and tumble kid, and instead he's super
• 44:27
  Speaker 2: nerdy because all he's known is school and mom.
• 44:30
  Speaker 5: Yeah, because that kind of annoys me as the child
• 44:33
  Speaker 5: of a single mom, that it's turned into this thing
• 44:36
  Speaker 5: where it's like, you're a feral child because you had
• 44:38
  Speaker 5: a single mom.
• 44:39
  Speaker 2: Right. Well, he had a dad, too.
• 44:42
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 44:42
  Speaker 2: He had a stepfather, according to the movie.
• 44:44
  Speaker 5: He had a crazy, wacky, hippie dad. I'm pointing at you,
• 44:48
  Speaker 5: Paul Moeller. But you know what I'm saying? Like, there's
• 44:52
  Speaker 5: no reason that we ended up rocking the boat. Like,
• 44:55
  Speaker 5: we were trying to be smart. And we could have
• 44:58
  Speaker 5: used a dude that was like, let's go check out Aliens.
• 45:01
  Speaker 2: See this? But that's, like, this character, as we know
• 45:05
  Speaker 2: in the movie, is completely surrounded by studious people. Like, Marion,
• 45:10
  Speaker 2: even as the story continues, does nothing but hang out
• 45:13
  Speaker 2: with guys that teach college classes. So, like, the guy
• 45:16
  Speaker 2: she marries is one of those guys. The John Hertz
• 45:18
  Speaker 2: character is one of those guys who ends up kind
• 45:21
  Speaker 2: of half raising this kid. So, like, it almost is like,
• 45:25
  Speaker 2: is he trying to be defiant? By becoming a greaser,
• 45:28
  Speaker 2: because he must have been nothing but. Again, he talks
• 45:31
  Speaker 2: about hating school, which I totally get that part. But, like,
• 45:35
  Speaker 2: he's so anti-school.
• 45:37
  Speaker 7: Like, is that the only thing? It's just the only
• 45:39
  Speaker 7: way to defy your parents.
• 45:41
  Speaker 2: When all you've known is growing up in a studious
• 45:44
  Speaker 2: college scenario is like, fuck that, I'm not even finishing
• 45:48
  Speaker 2: high school. So... I don't know. Like, is that how
• 45:51
  Speaker 2: it was written on purpose? Or is it just left together? Well,
• 45:54
  Speaker 2: that makes sense.
• 45:54
  Speaker 7: And I kind of assumed that that was the case.
• 45:57
  Speaker 7: You know, he was rebelling against the intelligentsia thing he
• 46:01
  Speaker 7: was born into.
• 46:02
  Speaker 5: But that's so crazy and stupid. And if my.
• 46:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a thing that happens. But it's what kids do.
• 46:08
  Speaker 2: That's what a lot of kids do.
• 46:10
  Speaker 5: If my parents were Indiana Jones and Marion, I would
• 46:12
  Speaker 5: be like, I'm going to learn to dig up shit.
• 46:13
  Speaker 2: But he also didn't know that was his dad.
• 46:16
  Speaker 5: If my mom was marrying and she said, oh, well,
• 46:19
  Speaker 5: we stopped Hitler, I'd be like, what? We stopped Hitler?
• 46:24
  Speaker 5: Hell yeah. I'm going to go stop aliens and crystal
• 46:29
  Speaker 5: skulls and shit.
• 46:30
  Speaker 2: See, you love the alien plot.
• 46:31
  Speaker 5: Puma punku, bitches.
• 46:33
  Speaker 2: Puma punku. Just the movie in general, this is another,
• 46:38
  Speaker 2: and from the very beginning, I had this problem with it.
• 46:41
  Speaker 2: And watching it again, I'm like, this is one of
• 46:43
  Speaker 2: those things that does totally separate this And it seems
• 46:46
  Speaker 2: weird to me. All of our adventures on film anyway
• 46:52
  Speaker 2: start off with this other story. And then we switch gears.
• 46:57
  Speaker 2: It's essentially the same thing a James Bond movie does.
• 47:01
  Speaker 2: We pick up midway into a crazy adventure that this
• 47:03
  Speaker 2: character has. He finishes that one out. Credits roll. Here's
• 47:08
  Speaker 2: the name of the movie. He goes back to Marcus
• 47:12
  Speaker 2: or go hang out with Moneypenny and figure out what
• 47:14
  Speaker 2: his next mission is. And then we start the real
• 47:17
  Speaker 2: movie that we're there for. We don't start off looking
• 47:19
  Speaker 2: for the arc in the first 20.
• 47:22
  Speaker 7: Minutes of the movie. The first 15, he's running from
• 47:25
  Speaker 7: a boulder trying to get the idol. Totally different thing.
• 47:28
  Speaker 2: Each movie, even by the third one, when we're getting
• 47:33
  Speaker 2: more of a backstory of him... They find a way
• 47:36
  Speaker 2: to ham-fistedly shove everything that makes Indiana Jones into this
• 47:39
  Speaker 2: one adventure.
• 47:40
  Speaker 5: Yeah, it makes any sense.
• 47:41
  Speaker 2: A little too much, maybe. But still, looking for totally,
• 47:44
  Speaker 2: like it's the thing that comes back around and he's
• 47:46
  Speaker 2: looking for it as an adult. But as soon as
• 47:48
  Speaker 2: we get done with that, he goes back to the college,
• 47:51
  Speaker 2: gets an entirely different plot thrown at him. We don't
• 47:54
  Speaker 2: do that this time. No. We start off looking for
• 47:57
  Speaker 2: the exact, we're fighting the same bad guy.
• 47:58
  Speaker 5: Yeah, it's the exact same story.
• 48:01
  Speaker 2: We end up going from a, dead alien body to
• 48:03
  Speaker 2: a crystal skull, but it's essentially the same big story
• 48:06
  Speaker 2: going on, which has never been like that in the
• 48:09
  Speaker 2: other three movies. So that seems weird because it's still
• 48:12
  Speaker 2: co-written by the same guy, directed by the same guy.
• 48:15
  Speaker 2: So why do we veer away?
• 48:17
  Speaker 5: I don't know. So I would start off with the
• 48:23
  Speaker 5: Spear of Destiny. I'd go back, and then to go forward,
• 48:28
  Speaker 5: I would leap forward with a female lead as his daughter.
• 48:33
  Speaker 5: to turkey all right currently like i would take that
• 48:39
  Speaker 5: big of a thing you're looking at me like.
• 48:41
  Speaker 7: You're crazy no i'm just trying to remember some names
• 48:44
  Speaker 7: like 2008 that you were doing this.
• 48:47
  Speaker 5: Or like now like now like now so if i
• 48:50
  Speaker 5: had to take it beyond that.
• 48:51
  Speaker 2: If we're doing number five yeah we like work in
• 48:54
  Speaker 2: a really old harrison ford at the beginning Passing the whip.
• 48:58
  Speaker 5: The spear of destiny.
• 49:00
  Speaker 2: Passing the whip. Passing the whip to his daughter.
• 49:03
  Speaker 5: To his daughter.
• 49:04
  Speaker 2: Who. Who then goes on to Gobekli Tepe. Yeah. All right.
• 49:12
  Speaker 5: Because I love that. I love Gobekli Tepe.
• 49:14
  Speaker 2: It's a great thing.
• 49:15
  Speaker 5: I think there's a lot of, awesome stuff.
• 49:17
  Speaker 2: I don't know how you make that up.
• 49:19
  Speaker 5: It doesn't matter because you go through the story where
• 49:22
  Speaker 5: you're like, that's her history and she's picked it up
• 49:26
  Speaker 5: and he's- Sure.
• 49:27
  Speaker 2: I mean, maybe she's Turkish.
• 49:29
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 49:29
  Speaker 2: Does she swing through trees with monkeys?
• 49:32
  Speaker 5: No.
• 49:32
  Speaker 2: Oh, damn it. That didn't bother me as much. I mean,
• 49:37
  Speaker 2: it's ridiculous, but it's no more ridiculous than the other stuff.
• 49:40
  Speaker 2: That I can almost live with.
• 49:42
  Speaker 5: The first one is ridiculous, and yet it's not.
• 49:45
  Speaker 2: They're still doing ridiculous things. They don't seem as cartoony,
• 49:48
  Speaker 2: I guess. But this fourth one is massively cartoony. Far
• 49:52
  Speaker 2: more plausible than the fourth one.
• 49:54
  Speaker 5: Like, I love.
• 49:56
  Speaker 2: That whole jungle scene.
• 49:57
  Speaker 5: Ridiculous, but cartoony.
• 49:59
  Speaker 2: It's just cartoony. I don't mind. Like, the jungle fight
• 50:01
  Speaker 2: is fine. Like, it's kind of par with what's going
• 50:05
  Speaker 2: on in the rest of the series. I think the
• 50:07
  Speaker 2: thing that seems so ridiculous to me, just because, like,
• 50:10
  Speaker 2: it didn't even make sense in the real world, when
• 50:13
  Speaker 2: he's in the not quicksand and he's sinking and they
• 50:16
  Speaker 2: throw him a snake that's still alive. Like, even if
• 50:21
  Speaker 2: it were dead, I would almost let it slide. You're not, like,
• 50:24
  Speaker 2: he throws the head at him. and it's alive and
• 50:28
  Speaker 2: he's supposed to grab onto it and get pulled out
• 50:31
  Speaker 2: i'm like first of all that isn't not gonna pull
• 50:33
  Speaker 2: the snake and remember that part that's crazy yeah it's
• 50:37
  Speaker 2: just that part seems so badly slapped together.
• 50:40
  Speaker 5: Because i love callbacks callbacks.
• 50:42
  Speaker 2: Are great all they're trying to do but all.
• 50:44
  Speaker 5: They're doing are these ridiculous callbacks that don't mean anything
• 50:47
  Speaker 5: and it's.
• 50:48
  Speaker 2: Drug out like it's the whole time him going no
• 50:50
  Speaker 2: i don't want to grab it they're just like grab
• 50:51
  Speaker 2: the snake it It takes way too long for this
• 50:55
  Speaker 2: just to call back for fans who've been there the
• 50:58
  Speaker 2: other movies.
• 50:59
  Speaker 5: But it would have been way better because we know
• 51:00
  Speaker 5: it and if it was like a dead tail of
• 51:03
  Speaker 5: a snake he would have been like oh my god.
• 51:05
  Speaker 2: Or if he already like here throw me the rope
• 51:08
  Speaker 2: and he pulls him out and he finds out it's
• 51:10
  Speaker 2: a snake and then he kind of freaks out a
• 51:12
  Speaker 2: little bit. Maybe. Okay. But the way it's played is
• 51:15
  Speaker 2: so hammy.
• 51:17
  Speaker 5: It's really bad.
• 51:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah I mean it's so heavy.
• 51:19
  Speaker 5: Like I don't know why we feel like we have
• 51:21
  Speaker 5: to keep And it doesn't matter what it is. It
• 51:24
  Speaker 5: could be Star Wars. It could be that. It could
• 51:26
  Speaker 5: be Star Trek. It's like you keep throwing these things
• 51:30
  Speaker 5: at people that are so heavy-handed throwbacks and callbacks that
• 51:33
  Speaker 5: it's like it loses the charm. And I don't know
• 51:36
  Speaker 5: how people who are making these things don't see that.
• 51:41
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah. I will. We can round it out since
• 51:45
  Speaker 2: we've beat Dindy to death with the snake. It doesn't
• 51:49
  Speaker 2: have any memorable quotes, but... more so than any of
• 51:53
  Speaker 2: the other three, it worked in a phrase into the usage,
• 52:01
  Speaker 2: the pop culture lexicon, that none of the others have
• 52:06
  Speaker 2: their own terminology. I mean, for years you could say,
• 52:10
  Speaker 2: nuke the fridge, and people knew exactly what you were
• 52:14
  Speaker 2: talking about. So it is definitely... It definitely made its
• 52:20
  Speaker 2: mark on the cinematic world. Absolutely.
• 52:24
  Speaker 7: I still think there's potential to that scene.
• 52:28
  Speaker 2: I love moments about it, but it's still so, like
• 52:33
  Speaker 2: it's just mishandled. I did like that scene. So, what
• 52:39
  Speaker 2: have we learned about the fourth Indiana Jones movie? Well,
• 52:43
  Speaker 2: there needs to be a fifth one, and they need
• 52:45
  Speaker 2: to redeem themselves. Do we keep the Mutt character into
• 52:48
  Speaker 2: the fifth one? No. God, no. How do you retcon that?
• 52:53
  Speaker 2: Does he not exist, or do we start off the
• 52:55
  Speaker 2: fifth when Mutt is continuing the opening adventure, and he
• 52:59
  Speaker 2: gets killed? I don't know. Just so we can off Mutt. No.
• 53:04
  Speaker 5: He's learned a lot from.
• 53:06
  Speaker 7: Indiana?
• 53:07
  Speaker 5: Indiana, and he becomes an incredibly nerdy scholar.
• 53:11
  Speaker 7: Oh, I was going to say, he becomes... an incredibly
• 53:14
  Speaker 7: accomplished motorcycle repairman.
• 53:17
  Speaker 2: That's all he wanted to do, really.
• 53:19
  Speaker 5: I know.
• 53:20
  Speaker 2: And then he was on board with that.
• 53:21
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 53:21
  Speaker 2: And there's nothing wrong with that. Go for it. There's
• 53:24
  Speaker 2: nothing wrong with that. Until he found out he was
• 53:26
  Speaker 2: his son and then he changed his mind.
• 53:27
  Speaker 5: Besides all of that stuff, like, what do you want
• 53:30
  Speaker 5: to see.
• 53:31
  Speaker 2: I still think that would be interesting and would go
• 53:33
  Speaker 2: with all of the things we've said. What if that's
• 53:36
  Speaker 2: the opening adventure? Indy is retired. Mutt has taken over
• 53:40
  Speaker 2: in the going to look for artifacts.
• 53:42
  Speaker 5: So wait a minute. What if you take Mutt and
• 53:44
  Speaker 5: make him like the Bond character where he makes the
• 53:48
  Speaker 5: things of the M, right? So what if Mutt becomes Q.
• 53:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah, Q makes the stuff. Q makes the stuff.
• 53:56
  Speaker 5: And he makes the things that are used. But what?
• 53:59
  Speaker 5: stories would you want to see him address if.
• 54:02
  Speaker 2: You want i still like in the opening scene we
• 54:05
  Speaker 2: kill him then we find out that since then they've
• 54:08
  Speaker 2: gotten married because i mean how many years has it
• 54:11
  Speaker 2: been now so what she.
• 54:13
  Speaker 5: Can't have a child she's like nah she's fine she's marrying.
• 54:19
  Speaker 2: What if they have an adopted child And she's just
• 54:23
  Speaker 2: the right age to go off on her own adventures
• 54:26
  Speaker 2: since her brother just got killed. She has to go
• 54:28
  Speaker 2: take over on the adventure. And maybe Indy comes out
• 54:31
  Speaker 2: of retirement to help her.
• 54:32
  Speaker 5: So maybe that's how you bring in the character.
• 54:35
  Speaker 2: Oh, shit.
• 54:37
  Speaker 5: So what if you had the child that he didn't
• 54:41
  Speaker 5: know he had was an Indian girl?
• 54:45
  Speaker 2: What if he also didn't know he had a child
• 54:47
  Speaker 2: with Willie Scott? Wait a minute. So now he has
• 54:50
  Speaker 2: two children he didn't know about. Indiana Jones is like
• 54:52
  Speaker 2: the BB King of the archaeology world.
• 54:54
  Speaker 7: Indiana Jones is a hoe is what we're finding out.
• 54:58
  Speaker 2: He was hooking up with women. He's got children in prison.
• 55:02
  Speaker 5: He's Indiana Jones.
• 55:03
  Speaker 6: Everywhere.
• 55:05
  Speaker 2: 80s era Harrison Ford could have hooked up with anybody.
• 55:09
  Speaker 5: That era Harrison Ford, I mean, that's my gold standard.
• 55:12
  Speaker 5: All right.
• 55:13
  Speaker 2: Well, I'm not going to argue that at all.
• 55:14
  Speaker 5: Any woman in my age range, that's probably the gold standard.
• 55:17
  Speaker 2: And a lot of men. Yeah, that's true. That's true.
• 55:21
  Speaker 5: And really, I don't mean that like, you know, you
• 55:23
  Speaker 5: can take all that shit from that era and still like,
• 55:27
  Speaker 5: that was my stamping thing. Right? Like, of what I
• 55:32
  Speaker 5: was attracted to. And a lot of women from that
• 55:34
  Speaker 5: time was like... Yeah. The 80s, 70s Harrison Ford.
• 55:42
  Speaker 2: I think you're not alone in that.
• 55:44
  Speaker 5: Sexual imprinting.
• 55:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's the word.
• 55:47
  Speaker 5: That is.
• 55:48
  Speaker 7: So, what do you imprint on the future?
• 55:54
  Speaker 5: I think that, like, to me, that he would have
• 55:57
  Speaker 5: a daughter that was like, Fucking awesome.
• 56:00
  Speaker 2: I love that idea. I think that'd be a great idea.
• 56:02
  Speaker 2: So either way, if we're killing Mutt or he's making
• 56:05
  Speaker 2: weapons and craziness for him.
• 56:07
  Speaker 3: He's cute.
• 56:07
  Speaker 2: It doesn't have to be a daughter.
• 56:09
  Speaker 4: He's cute.
• 56:09
  Speaker 5: It has to be a daughter.
• 56:10
  Speaker 2: It does. She wants a daughter.
• 56:13
  Speaker 5: Miriam was like my... I always thought it was like,
• 56:17
  Speaker 5: how did she end up to bed? And she could
• 56:19
  Speaker 5: now drink everybody.
• 56:21
  Speaker 2: Maybe it's Miriam's brother's daughter. It doesn't matter.
• 56:25
  Speaker 5: She thinks that she's... The daughter of Miriam and Harrison Ford.
• 56:32
  Speaker 2: I mean, it could be. It could be. I mean,
• 56:34
  Speaker 2: you know, it's crazy. Records are lost. You know, things happen.
• 56:38
  Speaker 2: It's the 60s. Maybe Miriam didn't know.
• 56:40
  Speaker 5: Like, it could have been, what's the name of the guy?
• 56:42
  Speaker 2: The character.
• 56:43
  Speaker 7: And I love the idea of somehow working in the,
• 56:47
  Speaker 7: you know, MKUltra into the scenario where Miriam somehow got.
• 56:53
  Speaker 2: Involved in a CIA plot.
• 56:55
  Speaker 5: Orange Sunshine.
• 56:56
  Speaker 2: Plot to take you know acid and you know the
• 57:00
  Speaker 2: government's after him by the beginning of this fourth movie
• 57:04
  Speaker 2: they're keeping an eye on him.
• 57:06
  Speaker 5: So wait a minute we've totally gotten beyond what we
• 57:08
  Speaker 5: were asking I don't think so I would like to
• 57:10
  Speaker 5: know what weird things you know what they were addressing
• 57:15
  Speaker 5: because we've talked about the Ark aliens.
• 57:20
  Speaker 2: The stones Indian hearts no the stones is what he
• 57:24
  Speaker 2: was looking for the stones Why not? So what are
• 57:28
  Speaker 2: they looking for next?
• 57:29
  Speaker 7: What are they looking for in the fifth movie?
• 57:33
  Speaker 5: Yes. If you had to pick... And again, there.
• 57:37
  Speaker 2: Were so many things. Going through all those other stories,
• 57:40
  Speaker 2: each one had a thing that he was looking for
• 57:42
  Speaker 2: that was equally as mystical and magical and awesome. From
• 57:45
  Speaker 2: the comics, I think Dark Horse did a series. All
• 57:48
  Speaker 2: those little paperback novels they did. There's so many other things.
• 57:52
  Speaker 2: So again, I think that's what we're missing out on.
• 57:54
  Speaker 2: I think Indiana Jones, as a character, has so much
• 57:57
  Speaker 2: that we should be getting.
• 57:59
  Speaker 5: But so do all those DC and Marvel. I mean,
• 58:02
  Speaker 5: there are so many stories that we haven't even touched on.
• 58:05
  Speaker 5: And like, Vertigo? Don't even get me started.
• 58:09
  Speaker 2: Don't get her started.
• 58:10
  Speaker 5: I love. I mean, they've made Preacher.
• 58:14
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 58:15
  Speaker 2: So we should have another Indiana Jones TV show, is
• 58:18
  Speaker 2: what you're saying.
• 58:20
  Speaker 5: I want the Invisible one.
• 58:21
  Speaker 2: Well, wait a minute.
• 58:22
  Speaker 7: I'd like to get back to what the object of
• 58:24
  Speaker 7: desire is for the fifth movie.
• 58:27
  Speaker 2: What is that? What is that?
• 58:29
  Speaker 7: Is it an ancient relic of, you know... Well, if
• 58:36
  Speaker 7: it was, what would that be?
• 58:37
  Speaker 2: That's what I'm asking.
• 58:39
  Speaker 5: So we haven't even talked about it. They never touched on, like,
• 58:45
  Speaker 5: the Apis Bull or the.
• 58:49
  Speaker 5: I mean, there's so many things you could look at.
• 58:51
  Speaker 5: You could be like the pyramids, the Osirium, Vesuvius.
• 58:59
  Speaker 2: The dragon ring, the knife of Cain, Noah's Ark.
• 59:03
  Speaker 5: Noah's Ark is a good one.
• 59:05
  Speaker 2: Invincible Ruby. These are all things Indiana Jones looked for
• 59:09
  Speaker 2: at some point. The Philosopher's Stone. Oh, the Philosopher's Stone.
• 59:12
  Speaker 5: Oh, Harry Potter found that.
• 59:13
  Speaker 2: We could have a crossover. We could have him. What
• 59:15
  Speaker 2: if his son is Harry Potter? And that's why Harry
• 59:18
  Speaker 2: Potter's so special. Indiana Jones, of course. Secret of the Sphinx.
• 59:26
  Speaker 2: The Sphinx. Sphinx. I'm reading it as it's written. Sphinx.
• 59:31
  Speaker 2: Not Sphinx. The Emperor's Tomb. Let's see. What else? Crystal
• 59:40
  Speaker 2: Cylinder of Stonehenge. Who needs a skull when you got
• 59:43
  Speaker 2: a cylinder? The Fourth Nail. I actually remember. That's one
• 59:46
  Speaker 2: of the Marvel comics, I think.
• 59:49
  Speaker 7: Again, if we want to keep some crazy Christian thing
• 59:52
  Speaker 7: going on, that's all kinds of Jesus there.
• 59:55
  Speaker 2: All kinds of Jesus. The Golden Guns of Buffalo Bill.
• 59:59
  Speaker 5: Was that a kid's one?
• 1:00:01
  Speaker 2: Which one?
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 5: Like the Golden Guns of Buffalo Bill was at Indiana Jones.
• 1:00:06
  Speaker 2: It's the Further Adventures of Indiana Jones.
• 1:00:08
  Speaker 5: Yeah, the kid ones.
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Well, but I think that's what the Marvel comics
• 1:00:13
  Speaker 2: were called too. The Staff of Kings, The Fate of Atlantis,
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 2: Golden Fleece, Spear of Destiny, Iron Phoenix. There's many, many
• 1:00:25
  Speaker 2: things for Indy to go looking for.
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 5: Skinwalker Ring. yeah no skinwalker ranch yeah you know okay
• 1:00:36
  Speaker 5: so what if you do this how about this so
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 5: what if what if we filmed you as like the
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 5: older young indiana jones and we superimposed your answers into
• 1:00:47
  Speaker 5: ancient aliens.
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 7: You mean as a as a commenter Yeah, like you
• 1:00:55
  Speaker 7: could be.
• 1:00:56
  Speaker 2: I'm the David Childress of... Puma Punko. Archaeologists?
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 2: This is complicated. What are we.
• 1:01:02
  Speaker 5: That'd be funny. You'd be like, well, as a.
• 1:01:05
  Speaker 2: Because that's how David Childress sees himself.
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 5: Right, he thinks he's Indiana Jones.
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 2: He thinks he's Indiana Jones.
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 5: But if you were like, well, I'm Paul Jones.
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 2: Puma Punko. Here at Puma Punko.
• 1:01:18
  Speaker 5: So you could do all this like.
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 7: 90 degree angles that cuts the thing with the thing.
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 5: No, nobody's in this with me. I love ridiculous. Why
• 1:01:27
  Speaker 5: are we doing ridiculous?
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 2: I don't know that anyone's that ridiculous.
• 1:01:33
  Speaker 7: I wonder why there's not a completely fictitious.
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 2: Object of desire to go after. I mean, the crystal
• 1:01:47
  Speaker 2: skulls was probably the closest that they've come. I mean,
• 1:01:49
  Speaker 2: the skulls.
• 1:01:50
  Speaker 7: But there were kind of general enough. There are crystal skulls.
• 1:01:54
  Speaker 7: There are objects. I think the stones are more.
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 2: The stones are. The stones are very. That's some thing.
• 1:01:59
  Speaker 2: There are.
• 1:02:00
  Speaker 6: Those are.
• 1:02:01
  Speaker 2: The stones felt like another, like, just a one-off of
• 1:02:05
  Speaker 2: the Marvel comics. Like, each one, there was something he's
• 1:02:07
  Speaker 2: looking for. That could have been any one of those.
• 1:02:09
  Speaker 2: It wasn't such an epic thing. The Ark of the
• 1:02:14
  Speaker 2: Covenant or the Cup of Christ. These are pretty huge things.
• 1:02:19
  Speaker 2: I like the lesser stakes. I think that's part of
• 1:02:21
  Speaker 2: what I like about Temple of Doom. is like it
• 1:02:24
  Speaker 2: it that's what gives him like this whole there's no
• 1:02:27
  Speaker 2: legacy like there's all of these things he's looking.
• 1:02:29
  Speaker 7: For overhanging uh you know christian symbology it's because eventually
• 1:02:34
  Speaker 7: if that's all he's looking for he's just like a
• 1:02:36
  Speaker 7: religious freak like so i like that he's more of
• 1:02:39
  Speaker 7: an archaeologist that's looking for anything essential he was forced
• 1:02:43
  Speaker 7: into the scenario in the in raiders of the lost
• 1:02:45
  Speaker 7: ark but yeah yeah but and and and in the
• 1:02:48
  Speaker 7: third one.
• 1:02:48
  Speaker 2: It's his dad's fault so It's his dad's fault. Yeah, absolutely.
• 1:02:51
  Speaker 5: How would the story have been different if he had
• 1:02:54
  Speaker 5: been investigating Summer Isle?
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 2: You mean as.
• 1:03:01
  Speaker 5: Indiana Jones as Inspector... I can't even... This is crazy,
• 1:03:05
  Speaker 5: because I just go to the alternate universe of so-and-so
• 1:03:08
  Speaker 5: is so-and-so and what that means.
• 1:03:10
  Speaker 2: But that wouldn't be really archaeology. Could be. But what
• 1:03:13
  Speaker 2: if he just ended up there?
• 1:03:15
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:03:15
  Speaker 2: Got himself... Like, they were on vacation.
• 1:03:17
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 2: He and Marion were off like, let's go here. Okay.
• 1:03:21
  Speaker 2: Kicked back for a couple.
• 1:03:22
  Speaker 5: Of weeks to see how things go.
• 1:03:25
  Speaker 2: Hey-ho, who is there? Hey-ho. We landed by a seaplane
• 1:03:32
  Speaker 2: and just.
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 5: Decided to check out this thing.
• 1:03:36
  Speaker 2: They grow our apples here. Yeah.
• 1:03:37
  Speaker 5: But how different would that story have been?
• 1:03:40
  Speaker 2: I don't know. It's equally folk glory. Right. I think
• 1:03:44
  Speaker 2: you could work them in just fine.
• 1:03:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 2: I don't think it would have cared. And Karen winds
• 1:03:49
  Speaker 2: up in a wicker man.
• 1:03:51
  Speaker 5: No, here's the thing.
• 1:03:52
  Speaker 2: They wouldn't have cared.
• 1:03:53
  Speaker 5: But Indiana has to save her. Some dude, and they
• 1:03:55
  Speaker 5: had to put some dude in there, and they got
• 1:03:58
  Speaker 5: a dude. Maybe it was Mutt.
• 1:03:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, well, no, it's essentially the middle of
• 1:04:02
  Speaker 2: Temple of Doom. Like, we watch someone's heart get ripped out,
• 1:04:06
  Speaker 2: but it's not Indy. Indy gets saved at the end.
• 1:04:08
  Speaker 2: So this one, like, we watch some other, maybe they
• 1:04:11
  Speaker 2: have multiple mins. Yeah. And so, like, we watched the
• 1:04:14
  Speaker 2: day before they have this ceremony where they burn this
• 1:04:16
  Speaker 2: guy alive. The next day, they take Marion and put
• 1:04:19
  Speaker 2: her in there, and then he's got to go save her. Yeah.
• 1:04:22
  Speaker 5: So it's like they pass through so many of the.
• 1:04:26
  Speaker 2: Or perhaps this is how Indiana dies. Or she's in
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 2: there and no, he lives, he's in, he's the old
• 1:04:35
  Speaker 2: man in the beginning of the other TV show. So
• 1:04:39
  Speaker 2: he lived at least well into the 80s. And if
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 2: we make a movie now as old Indy, we have
• 1:04:44
  Speaker 2: to figure out how he lost his eye because he's
• 1:04:47
  Speaker 2: wearing a freaking eye patch as an old man. So
• 1:04:49
  Speaker 2: we have to work that into the new scenario.
• 1:04:52
  Speaker 5: Maybe it was a shaving mishap. No, I thought it
• 1:04:54
  Speaker 5: was because he discovered like if he had to go underground,
• 1:04:57
  Speaker 5: he had an eye for up, Above ground? Underground? I
• 1:05:00
  Speaker 5: don't know. I mean, I just assumed. I just take
• 1:05:03
  Speaker 5: all of that with like.
• 1:05:04
  Speaker 2: He has a cyborg eye. And like he uses it
• 1:05:06
  Speaker 2: to scan to get into the ship when the aliens
• 1:05:10
  Speaker 2: come back for him. What? Because they equipped him with
• 1:05:12
  Speaker 2: this cyborg eye.
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 5: You're making that up.
• 1:05:14
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but you're making up all your nonsense. So what
• 1:05:16
  Speaker 2: difference does it make? But that part is true. We
• 1:05:20
  Speaker 2: know that Indy doesn't get killed if we're buying that
• 1:05:23
  Speaker 2: the TV show is canon. then we're watching him as
• 1:05:26
  Speaker 2: an 80-year-old or whatever, as the old man telling these
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 2: stories in the TV series. So he lives into the 80s,
• 1:05:34
  Speaker 2: like the late 80s.
• 1:05:35
  Speaker 5: I need to watch that.
• 1:05:37
  Speaker 2: I think he needs to die. How about, to make
• 1:05:41
  Speaker 2: all your things come together, Marion dies in there. He's
• 1:05:46
  Speaker 2: really upset about it, but then he can find some
• 1:05:48
  Speaker 2: young woman to marry so he can have that daughter
• 1:05:50
  Speaker 2: that you're looking for so much. Now, are you willing
• 1:05:53
  Speaker 2: to sacrifice Marion... To get the daughter that you want
• 1:05:56
  Speaker 2: so bad. Since you said she's out of the running
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 2: for motherhood now. What if she dies tragically? He has
• 1:06:05
  Speaker 2: to overcome that and eventually marries a young woman. He's
• 1:06:08
  Speaker 2: in his 30s and 40s in the 1930s. Chaplin was
• 1:06:14
  Speaker 2: knocking out kids in his 90s. I know.
• 1:06:16
  Speaker 5: He can do it.
• 1:06:16
  Speaker 2: I know, I know. But he was too old to
• 1:06:19
  Speaker 2: pick them up. Indy! Indy! Is a very virulent man.
• 1:06:27
  Speaker 5: Well, I don't know. Yeah, I mean, that's a weird one.
• 1:06:31
  Speaker 5: Because there's nobody like me. I don't know. Yeah, I
• 1:06:33
  Speaker 5: don't know if I'm okay with that. No, I think
• 1:06:36
  Speaker 5: that Mutt should have been a girl.
• 1:06:39
  Speaker 2: Mutt should have been a girl. A little late for
• 1:06:40
  Speaker 2: that now. Where were you at when George was writing
• 1:06:42
  Speaker 2: this story? Hmm.
• 1:06:45
  Speaker 5: I mean, I'm just saying.
• 1:06:46
  Speaker 7: There's no way to really rectify this story.
• 1:06:51
  Speaker 2: In the end, she becomes.
• 1:06:54
  Speaker 5: The young girl becomes, I want to go wherever and
• 1:06:57
  Speaker 5: my back hurts and I can't pick anything up.
• 1:06:59
  Speaker 2: Oh, that's a callback. A behind the scenes callback. All right. Yikes. So,
• 1:07:08
  Speaker 2: I don't know. I think you're right. I think killing
• 1:07:11
  Speaker 2: him is the Perfect scenario. Is that the way to
• 1:07:16
  Speaker 2: almost fan service? We know how much you hated this character.
• 1:07:19
  Speaker 2: How about the opening scene of this movie? But we
• 1:07:22
  Speaker 2: can't pretend as though it didn't happen. I don't think so.
• 1:07:24
  Speaker 2: Because that is definitely a mistake.
• 1:07:26
  Speaker 5: Then he becomes the Q. I don't think you kill
• 1:07:30
  Speaker 5: him off.
• 1:07:31
  Speaker 2: He can be there, I guess.
• 1:07:32
  Speaker 5: You add him.
• 1:07:33
  Speaker 7: He becomes the Sala of the Raiders of the Lost Ark.
• 1:07:37
  Speaker 2: He becomes the guy that connects... Very dangerous. You go first. Right. Exactly.
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 2: That guy.
• 1:07:45
  Speaker 5: I think that you take it and you make it
• 1:07:48
  Speaker 5: like a, you know, twin. It's a Star Wars twin
• 1:07:51
  Speaker 5: sibling thing.
• 1:07:52
  Speaker 2: So she had twins. She knew about it.
• 1:07:56
  Speaker 7: But she never said anything to Indy. And he only
• 1:07:59
  Speaker 7: now finds out.
• 1:08:02
  Speaker 2: He died.
• 1:08:03
  Speaker 5: No, the other guy's the idiot. She's the brains. And
• 1:08:06
  Speaker 5: then they figure out that she is... the brains, and
• 1:08:09
  Speaker 5: he's the idiot.
• 1:08:10
  Speaker 2: And they have to join forces like Wonder Twins.
• 1:08:14
  Speaker 5: They're not going to let their parents, like, hard work.
• 1:08:17
  Speaker 2: Wonder Twins, activate! Form of Crystal Skull! Wait, that was
• 1:08:22
  Speaker 2: a terrible idea, wasn't it? Oops. I guess it would
• 1:08:25
  Speaker 2: be Ice Skull in his case. Form of Firebird Phoenix!
• 1:08:31
  Speaker 2: We just talked about that. That's a different movie.
• 1:08:33
  Speaker 5: Who would you cast as.
• 1:08:35
  Speaker 2: Alright, we've full circle back into an old episode. We have. So, anything,
• 1:08:41
  Speaker 2: have we found anything out in this scenario? Well, Mutt
• 1:08:45
  Speaker 2: needs to die.
• 1:08:46
  Speaker 3: No.
• 1:08:47
  Speaker 2: Or, get a new job as Q Branch for Indiana Jones.
• 1:08:52
  Speaker 2: As long as he sits at home making stuff and
• 1:08:55
  Speaker 2: doesn't come out on the adventure because we don't want
• 1:08:57
  Speaker 2: to see him.
• 1:08:58
  Speaker 5: Because I always have the great idea at the end.
• 1:09:00
  Speaker 5: like role swap. What if he became Q for the
• 1:09:07
  Speaker 5: Bond franchise and you had this crossover between... I've heard
• 1:09:11
  Speaker 5: that before. Really?
• 1:09:13
  Speaker 2: Shit. But, well, I mean, just the Bond and Indy
• 1:09:17
  Speaker 2: in the same universe. That's how you would do it.
• 1:09:20
  Speaker 2: That's a geeky thing, you know. I didn't know this.
• 1:09:23
  Speaker 5: I hate movies. I don't watch movies.
• 1:09:26
  Speaker 2: I'm telling you, you got to work in MKUltra somehow.
• 1:09:29
  Speaker 2: Here's the real question that totally throws off our whole
• 1:09:36
  Speaker 2: thing this whole trip. So now that he's a well-respected actor,
• 1:09:40
  Speaker 2: when you redo this new movie, do you still cast
• 1:09:43
  Speaker 2: him to be Mutt and bring Shia back? No, he's
• 1:09:47
  Speaker 2: not a well-respected actor. He is by a lot of people, actually.
• 1:09:51
  Speaker 2: The only way he can redeem himself in this role
• 1:09:53
  Speaker 2: is to come back now and not be lame and
• 1:09:56
  Speaker 2: turn in a good performance. And then maybe everybody won't
• 1:09:58
  Speaker 2: hate him now. So they'll retroactively be like, well, I
• 1:10:01
  Speaker 2: guess he was okay in that last movie.
• 1:10:03
  Speaker 8: Nope.
• 1:10:04
  Speaker 2: All right. I don't care. I'd be open to it. Nope.
• 1:10:07
  Speaker 5: He's been in a great.
• 1:10:08
  Speaker 2: Because you like the arthouse scene.
• 1:10:11
  Speaker 5: He's been in great director's movies, but that was not
• 1:10:14
  Speaker 5: a great role for him.
• 1:10:15
  Speaker 2: You leave your Transformers love out of this. No. He
• 1:10:20
  Speaker 2: was not good at twins. And I love Michael Bay.
• 1:10:22
  Speaker 5: I don't.
• 1:10:22
  Speaker 2: That's what you're thinking right now. Gina's a huge Michael
• 1:10:24
  Speaker 2: Bay fan.
• 1:10:25
  Speaker 5: I'm not. Oh, my God. You guys are making me
• 1:10:27
  Speaker 5: sound like an a-hole.
• 1:10:29
  Speaker 2: I do not.
• 1:10:29
  Speaker 5: That's not what I'm talking about.
• 1:10:30
  Speaker 7: Because only a-holes like Michael Bay.
• 1:10:33
  Speaker 2: That's not too far off, maybe. It's true.
• 1:10:36
  Speaker 5: That's not what I'm saying at all. He's been in
• 1:10:38
  Speaker 5: other things. Can we talk about Rick and Morty?
• 1:10:42
  Speaker 2: I guess it's time to wrap this one up. So.
• 1:10:45
  Speaker 2: Thank you for whether or not we accomplished anything for you.
• 1:10:48
  Speaker 2: I know, but it was an interesting journey. So thank
• 1:10:53
  Speaker 2: you for coming along. We've still come up with a
• 1:10:55
  Speaker 2: whole nother ridiculous idea. So we will return in the future. Otherwise,
• 1:11:01
  Speaker 2: that about does it. We will return next time. Same
• 1:11:03
  Speaker 2: geek feed. Thanks for listening.
• 1:11:13
  Speaker 1: Hey my friend, come over here quick The time.
• 1:11:17
  Speaker 2: For action is near There's buried treasure behind Mrs.
• 1:11:23
  Speaker 1: Anderson's garage About a half a block from here But
• 1:11:28
  Speaker 1: we must be ready for war Cause it won't be
• 1:11:33
  Speaker 1: easy to find But we'll do it again Cause we've
• 1:11:38
  Speaker 1: done it before Bring your weapons should we get in
• 1:11:41
  Speaker 1: a fight My mind makes a rifle from the stick
• 1:11:47
  Speaker 1: on the ground.
• 1:11:50
  Speaker 8: And I won't let the stormtroopers shoot me down.
• 1:12:01
  Speaker 1: If I want to stop being myself for.
• 1:12:04
  Speaker 4: A while But I don't want to do it alone
• 1:12:10
  Speaker 4: You can be Luke Skywalker And I'll be Indiana Jones Yeah.
• 1:12:32
  Speaker 1: Well, this is a jungle of locks I've never seen.
• 1:12:36
  Speaker 1: But my whip and my knife clear the way. Keep
• 1:12:40
  Speaker 1: that lightsaber handy. Look, my friend, we're not taking any
• 1:12:45
  Speaker 1: prisoners today.
• 1:12:47
  Speaker 8: Well, it's all right, my buddy.
• 1:12:49
  Speaker 2: I'm watching your back.
• 1:12:51
  Speaker 1: Just keep an eye on mine, too. Cause although we're
• 1:12:56
  Speaker 1: outnumbered and under attack, we'll show the bad guys what
• 1:13:00
  Speaker 1: the bad boys can do.
• 1:13:01
  Speaker 8: This hunting for treasure is always a dangerous charade. This
• 1:13:10
  Speaker 8: water balloon that I'm holding is really a hand grenade.
• 1:13:24
  Speaker 8: But I don't want to do it alone You.
• 1:13:29
  Speaker 6: Can be Luke Skywalker And I'll be Indiana Jones Yeah.
• 1:13:52
  Speaker 2: Well, we can finally go home now.
• 1:13:55
  Speaker 1: We got the treasure and we.
• 1:13:57
  Speaker 2: Rescued the girls.
• 1:13:59
  Speaker 1: And when mother asks me why I'm so muddy and bloody,
• 1:14:03
  Speaker 1: I can say, hey, it's tough saving the world.
• 1:14:07
  Speaker 6: And my rational conscience laughs at.
• 1:14:10
  Speaker 2: The way I pretend.
• 1:14:14
  Speaker 1: But when I wake up tomorrow, I'll.
• 1:14:26
  Speaker 4: I want to stop being myself for a while, but
• 1:14:29
  Speaker 4: I don't want to.
• 1:14:31
  Speaker 2: Do it alone.
• 1:14:32
  Speaker 6: You can be Luke Skywalker and I'll be Indiana Jones.
• 1:14:40
  Speaker 2: Yes, I'll be Indiana Jones.
• 1:14:43
  Speaker 1: Yes, I'll be Indiana Jones.
• 1:14:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:14:48
  Speaker 1: Ooh, ooh, ooh.
• 1:15:04
  Speaker 2: This is the vagina. Please elaborate.
• 1:15:10
  Speaker 6: Please elaborate.
• 1:15:10
  Speaker 2: That's funny.
• 1:15:10
  Speaker 6: Hi.
• 1:15:11
  Speaker 3: Hello.
• 1:15:11
  Speaker 2: Hello. I have no excuse for any of this.
• 1:15:25
  Speaker 3: This episode is a production of Movie Meltdown, produced and
• 1:15:28
  Speaker 3: edited by The Oddity Studios, with opening music performed by
• 1:15:31
  Speaker 3: The Empires. For more on how to sponsor or support
• 1:15:34
  Speaker 3: the show, email producer at moviemeltdown.com.
• 1:15:37
  Speaker 4: Talk hard!
• 1:15:44
  Speaker 2: This program is a proud member of the Battleship Pretension Fleet.