Latest / INSPIRE STORY / #0206_ STORY INSPIRE: Nervous Neurotic Animal — Anxiety, Chaos, Comedy & Unfiltered Stories
Transcript
- 0:00Speaker 1: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Tim Dillon Show. We
- 0:02Speaker 1: apologize for no video today. We had a setback with
- 0:07Speaker 1: our new studio. It went on fire. It was burned
- 0:10Speaker 1: down by Antifa. The Antifa burned down our studio. They
- 0:16Speaker 1: were young children dressed in black. They came in. They
- 0:20Speaker 1: threw Molotov cocktails through the window. They beat me pretty badly.
- 0:24Speaker 1: I don't think Ben was in on it, but I
- 0:27Speaker 1: can't know. So we're doing an internal investigation. It was
- 0:32Speaker 1: a little weird. Ben did let them in, much like
- 0:36Speaker 1: the Capitol riot. He's now claiming that he didn't know
- 0:39Speaker 1: they were dangerous, but they did not harm him, not
- 0:42Speaker 1: a hair on his head. I was beaten and the
- 0:46Speaker 1: studio was destroyed. So we are again here one day
- 0:50Speaker 1: late with an audio only episode. All right, I'm going
- 0:55Speaker 1: to admit it. That's a lie. That didn't happen. The
- 0:58Speaker 1: reason that we have audio only is because we are
- 1:01Speaker 1: at the end of a tour that has been a
- 1:03Speaker 1: blood sport. Now, I know you people don't care, and
- 1:07Speaker 1: this is free, and you say to yourself, well, you
- 1:09Speaker 1: make money on Patreon. Yeah, but this ain't that, and
- 1:12Speaker 1: that's not late. This is free. You get what people
- 1:16Speaker 1: get when they get free. And the tour, we were
- 1:21Speaker 1: on five planes in four days. We are wrapping this up.
- 1:26Speaker 1: It's over soon, and we go back to, you know,
- 1:28Speaker 1: we're going to do one tour a year. I'm going
- 1:30Speaker 1: to be out doing comedy clubs throughout the year, but
- 1:32Speaker 1: we do one tour a year in theaters, thanks, you know,
- 1:37Speaker 1: to everybody who bought a ticket, and that tour is
- 1:40Speaker 1: going to be, the next tour will be next fall.
- 1:43Speaker 1: And we'll do October, November, December, a little bit of Jan,
- 1:47Speaker 1: and then we shut it down. And by that time,
- 1:49Speaker 1: we'll have the studio. Well, we should have it by January, right?
- 1:52Speaker 2: Yeah, by early January.
- 1:53Speaker 1: What's going on with it? People think you're lying.
- 1:56Speaker 2: No, our guy, Mr. Pizza, he's building a great studio.
- 2:01Speaker 2: We're in contact every day.
- 2:02Speaker 1: But when you say Mr. Pizza, people think we're dealing
- 2:05Speaker 1: with a pedophile. So... But his name is actually pizza.
- 2:11Speaker 2: His last name is pizza.
- 2:13Speaker 1: It's actually his last name. And all he eats is salmon.
- 2:17Speaker 2: And broccoli.
- 2:19Speaker 1: Odd. But this gentleman, who you've entrusted our life to.
- 2:24Speaker 1: He built the first studio with the neon sign. He
- 2:26Speaker 1: did a great job.
- 2:26Speaker 2: Which everybody loved. He did a great job. Iconic set.
- 2:31Speaker 1: Yes. Sure. Sure. And now we have the new one,
- 2:34Speaker 1: and you're saying, when is the date? Give us a date.
- 2:37Speaker 1: Stop pushing things back. Stop blaming the supply chain. Start
- 2:41Speaker 1: taking responsibility for what you should be doing.
- 2:44Speaker 2: The first week of January, I have full confidence it
- 2:47Speaker 2: will be up and running. We have everything ordered. We
- 2:49Speaker 2: have everything planned out. We have the keys.
- 2:52Speaker 1: It is real.
- 2:53Speaker 2: Some people stopped me in the street in Atlanta and
- 2:56Speaker 2: accused me of lying about this whole ordeal.
- 2:58Speaker 1: They should have stabbed you to make a point. If
- 3:01Speaker 1: you stop him in the street, physically maim him. Because
- 3:06Speaker 1: he doesn't respond well to anything other than physical force.
- 3:11Speaker 1: But by the time we're on a tour like this
- 3:14Speaker 1: next year, hopefully we will have a studio that allows.
- 3:18Speaker 2: Us to be a little more consistent. And it will
- 3:20Speaker 2: be a less intense tour. We'll have more time to...
- 3:23Speaker 2: This was crazy. Every comic in America was booking venues.
- 3:28Speaker 2: You had to take what you could get. This thing
- 3:30Speaker 2: was routed crazy. We're here, we're there. But we're winding
- 3:35Speaker 2: down now. And the UK thing, you know, listen, it's
- 3:39Speaker 2: not looking good. And we would love to go.
- 3:41Speaker 1: It doesn't look good. I don't want to get stuck
- 3:43Speaker 1: in the UK. This Omicron or whatever it is, they're
- 3:46Speaker 1: at level four. They may be going to level five.
- 3:50Speaker 1: You know. So we're playing it by ear. But the
- 3:56Speaker 1: fear is that we are going to be in a
- 3:59Speaker 1: situation where we may have to push those dates down
- 4:03Speaker 1: the road.
- 4:04Speaker 2: Boris Johnson saying pubs, shops, and restaurants will probably be
- 4:07Speaker 2: forced to shut in January.
- 4:09Speaker 1: Boris Johnson delivering the bad news. Austin, Texas, where we
- 4:19Speaker 1: find ourselves right now. Yes. The worst city in America
- 4:23Speaker 1: or the worst city in the world. That is the question.
- 4:29Speaker 1: I should tweet that. And fuck Elon Musk if he
- 4:32Speaker 1: doesn't like it. And I love my friend Joe Rogan.
- 4:35Speaker 1: But you know what? If he doesn't like it, he
- 4:36Speaker 1: can go scratch too. Because this was the worst idea ever.
- 4:42Speaker 1: Let's move a bunch of libertarian billionaires who don't care
- 4:46Speaker 1: about anyone but themselves to a city and see if
- 4:49Speaker 1: they can create a thriving community. Well, it didn't work,
- 4:53Speaker 1: did it? You've got a bunch of billionaires here with
- 4:56Speaker 1: their own armies and their own apps. And then you've
- 4:59Speaker 1: got everybody else wandering around in the streets killing each other. Austin,
- 5:06Speaker 1: I've spent a year here. I've lived here for a year.
- 5:11Speaker 1: We're nearing the end of that. And just to add
- 5:15Speaker 1: insult to repeated injury, Netflix, and you know I love Netflix.
- 5:21Speaker 1: I love Netflix. I love that they won't give me
- 5:24Speaker 1: a special. I love that they don't care how many
- 5:29Speaker 1: tickets I've sold. They don't care that I've done a
- 5:31Speaker 1: special on their platform. They offered me a half hour.
- 5:34Speaker 1: I turned it down. Although watch Normand and all those.
- 5:38Speaker 1: I love Mark and I love Brian Simpson and, and Naomi,
- 5:41Speaker 1: a paragraph. And there's some really funny people doing that. Um,
- 5:45Speaker 1: but I said, no, we're going to do an hour
- 5:47Speaker 1: or we're not doing anything. And then they said, no, no, no,
- 5:50Speaker 1: we don't have the time for that. We don't have
- 5:51Speaker 1: the space. And I'm like, isn't it the internet? Don't
- 5:54Speaker 1: you have unlimited space? Literally unlimited. So I love Netflix.
- 6:00Speaker 1: And I'm not doing their Netflix comedy festival. Every American,
- 6:05Speaker 1: every comic in the United States is doing that festival.
- 6:07Speaker 1: I'm just not going to do it. I'm sitting it out.
- 6:11Speaker 1: But Netflix, they've, and listen, here's what I will say
- 6:14Speaker 1: about Netflix. They have made, how long has Netflix been around?
- 6:19Speaker 1: Like 2008. Get the exact number on that. Because I
- 6:24Speaker 1: will give credit where credit is due to Netflix.
- 6:29Speaker 2: It was founded in 97, actually.
- 6:31Speaker 1: Okay. Let's just say in the last 15 years, Netflix
- 6:37Speaker 1: has made six or seven watchable things, which I appreciate
- 6:44Speaker 1: as a consumer, right? Yeah. I think that's good. Every
- 6:48Speaker 1: two and a half to three years on average, they
- 6:51Speaker 1: make something that you can watch. And I think that's good.
- 6:57Speaker 1: Here's what I will say about the new program that
- 7:01Speaker 1: I binge watched the other day. It's called 20-somethings Austin, Texas.
- 7:07Speaker 1: If there was a show designed to make me physically
- 7:13Speaker 1: ill and also give me more pleasure than I knew possible,
- 7:18Speaker 1: it is the show 20-somethings Austin, Texas. Now, you guessed it.
- 7:25Speaker 1: The show is a real-world ripoff where Netflix moved four women...
- 7:35Speaker 1: and four men, self-identified, into two Airbnbs next to each
- 7:41Speaker 1: other in a gentrifying area of Austin, Texas. Ironically, we
- 7:46Speaker 1: stayed at one of these Airbnbs.
- 7:47Speaker 2: I believe we did, yeah.
- 7:49Speaker 1: The night before, I had that sit-down with Joe Rogan
- 7:51Speaker 1: and Alex Jones. Netflix moved these people into Austin, Texas
- 7:58Speaker 1: because they wanted to reinvent themselves, right? They wanted to
- 8:06Speaker 1: realize their dreams. One of them moved to do stand-up comedy.
- 8:11Speaker 1: One of them moved to be gay, literally. A guy
- 8:15Speaker 1: who said, I don't know how to be gay. I
- 8:16Speaker 1: came out late. I want to learn how to be gay.
- 8:20Speaker 1: And one of them moved to be a whore. You know,
- 8:25Speaker 1: one of them moved to model. And the model's not
- 8:27Speaker 1: that good-looking, and the stand-up isn't funny. It's Austin, right? Yeah.
- 8:32Speaker 1: So we've got C and D level people flocking to
- 8:37Speaker 1: this city, I guess, in Texas to take advantage of
- 8:43Speaker 1: this growing, glistening city on the hill as promised by
- 8:48Speaker 1: Elon Musk. And all of these people are showcased in
- 8:57Speaker 1: this Netflix show. And you see them, and the entire show,
- 9:02Speaker 1: of course, is about people imbibing in alcohol, because that
- 9:07Speaker 1: is the only thing to do here, is to drink
- 9:09Speaker 1: yourself to death. And these people come, and they drink,
- 9:14Speaker 1: and they try to get jobs, and they can't get jobs,
- 9:18Speaker 1: and they are then forced to, they're in the dating scene,
- 9:21Speaker 1: and they are going on dates, and they're going to
- 9:25Speaker 1: these little places shitty Austin bars, they're riding mechanical bulls,
- 9:33Speaker 1: and they are coming out of the closet, and the
- 9:38Speaker 1: show is so painfully sad. It is sad. It is
- 9:44Speaker 1: sad because the city of Austin, Texas is a lie,
- 9:52Speaker 1: and the people that are falling for the lie they're
- 9:55Speaker 1: impossible to pity. They're impossible. to feel bad for. You
- 10:02Speaker 1: cannot have any feeling other than slowly watching them become
- 10:10Speaker 1: the type of person that likes this place, which is
- 10:15Speaker 1: a drunken loser. There is no, very few exceptions to
- 10:20Speaker 1: that rule. And watching this show, watching these people, you know,
- 10:26Speaker 1: fail at bartending, watching these people fail try to have
- 10:33Speaker 1: intrapersonal relationships with each other. They all seem to be
- 10:36Speaker 1: somewhat relatively... They're novices to life. I mean, it's college,
- 10:46Speaker 1: except they're all in their mid to late 20s. And
- 10:49Speaker 1: they don't know how to relate to other people, and
- 10:52Speaker 1: they don't get it. And this is the city for them.
- 10:57Speaker 1: It is a city for people that are behind them.
- 11:01Speaker 1: People that are behind. They're not out in front. They're
- 11:05Speaker 1: not winning the race. They are behind. And they're moving
- 11:09Speaker 1: here to assume this identity of this free, like all
- 11:14Speaker 1: these people are like, I just, I'm going to be
- 11:16Speaker 1: an Austin. I just want to be free. I just
- 11:18Speaker 1: want to do what I want. You can do what
- 11:21Speaker 1: you want anywhere, dummy. What you're saying is you want
- 11:26Speaker 1: to do what you want and you want it to
- 11:28Speaker 1: work because it never worked anywhere else. That's what it is.
- 11:33Speaker 1: I want to be free to make horrible decisions and
- 11:37Speaker 1: have them work out. That's what they want. I want
- 11:41Speaker 1: to be free. I'm a free spirit. I'm about me.
- 11:45Speaker 1: I'm about me. What do you think they were about
- 11:49Speaker 1: where they came from? Others? They were about them there.
- 11:53Speaker 1: And they failed miserably there. Because you can't just be
- 11:57Speaker 1: about you if you is shit. If what you're selling
- 12:03Speaker 1: is shit, then you can't be about you. You gotta
- 12:07Speaker 1: be about another version of you. But But you see
- 12:12Speaker 1: with the show, and I watched all of the episodes
- 12:14Speaker 1: pretty much. I have a few left to go, and
- 12:15Speaker 1: I will stay with it because I think maybe at
- 12:18Speaker 1: the end there'll be, I don't know, a fire or
- 12:20Speaker 1: something that really speaks to me. But it's amazing. People
- 12:26Speaker 1: here have the same... like crackpot idea. Like I love
- 12:32Speaker 1: Joe to death, but when Joe's like, I like Austin
- 12:36Speaker 1: because LA is a bunch of people trying to get famous.
- 12:39Speaker 1: It's like your friends are Elon Musk. He doesn't exactly
- 12:43Speaker 1: issue the spotlight. He lives in an area with people
- 12:48Speaker 1: like Sandra Bullock. I mean, these are not simple country people.
- 12:53Speaker 1: This idea that like, I'm just a simple country man.
- 12:57Speaker 1: I'm a simple country man, and I'm here in Texas
- 13:02Speaker 1: with Sandra Bullock and Elon Musk, two simple country people.
- 13:07Speaker 1: That's not what it is. People in Austin are more
- 13:11Speaker 1: self-important and more fame-hungry than anyone in L.A., truly, truly.
- 13:18Speaker 1: This idea of L.A. is not even real. Yes, does
- 13:21Speaker 1: everyone want to be famous in L.A.? Sure, but at
- 13:24Speaker 1: least some of them have a fucking shot at it.
- 13:26Speaker 1: At least some of them are fucking hot. At least
- 13:29Speaker 1: some of them know how to play the game. You know?
- 13:32Speaker 1: You come here, these people want the same notoriety, the
- 13:37Speaker 1: same fame, they want money, and yet they are all
- 13:42Speaker 1: completely incapable of getting anywhere near that goal. It's a hellscape.
- 13:52Speaker 1: It's a pit. Truly a pit. I'm not going to
- 13:56Speaker 1: spend the whole thing on this, but just watch the show.
- 13:59Speaker 1: If you think I am wrong, watch the show. I've
- 14:03Speaker 1: been in Miami looking at condos because I'm Afro-Latino, which
- 14:08Speaker 1: means that I am black, but I am not African-American.
- 14:11Speaker 1: I was raised in Santo Domingo, and I am Dominican,
- 14:15Speaker 1: and I am Afro-Latino. I am going to be pursuing compa,
- 14:22Speaker 1: which is the music of Little Haiti. As someone who
- 14:26Speaker 1: is Afro-Latino, I no longer want to live in a
- 14:30Speaker 1: white society like Austin, Texas, with Ben, who doesn't like
- 14:35Speaker 1: or understand Miami, because when I dress in Balenciaga, he
- 14:39Speaker 1: thinks I look stupid, but he looks like a golfer
- 14:41Speaker 1: with AIDS. He looks like a golfer who sucks cock
- 14:45Speaker 1: on the side and got a mouthful of AIDS in
- 14:48Speaker 1: his bloody gums. And he's going to drop fucking dead.
- 14:51Speaker 1: So when I go to Miami and look like the
- 14:54Speaker 1: shit and inspire men, women, and children and everyone in between,
- 14:58Speaker 1: Ben gets threatened by it because he wants to be
- 15:01Speaker 1: on a fucking golf tee sucking someone off because he
- 15:05Speaker 1: looks like a golfer with human immunodeficiency virus. Truly. He
- 15:12Speaker 1: just wears these baggy clothes. He looks like all his
- 15:16Speaker 1: shirts hide AIDS lesions. So he says, oh, you look
- 15:19Speaker 1: so stupid. But actually, no, you dumb bitch. I don't
- 15:22Speaker 1: look stupid. You look stupid because you're a stupid white
- 15:25Speaker 1: piece of shit. But I'm Afro-Latino. It's true. I can
- 15:31Speaker 1: say the N-word, but I will not. But I will not.
- 15:34Speaker 1: I'm not going to, but I can. Because I am
- 15:38Speaker 1: an other... And that's why I feel comfortable in Miami
- 15:42Speaker 1: because that is where my culture is. So I was
- 15:44Speaker 1: looking at condos in Miami because other than being in LA,
- 15:48Speaker 1: I want somewhere outside of LA to go and it's
- 15:51Speaker 1: not gonna be this pit. We just had the best
- 15:54Speaker 1: tacos in Austin. Man, they were fine.
- 15:58Speaker 2: Yeah, good.
- 15:58Speaker 1: Fine. Good. Why is Taco Bell some of the best
- 16:05Speaker 1: Mexican food you have? Because food is an idea. Do
- 16:08Speaker 1: you understand what I mean? Tacos are an idea. Tacos
- 16:13Speaker 1: are about freedom. All these people moving to Austin, just
- 16:16Speaker 1: have a taco. That's all you want to do. You
- 16:19Speaker 1: just want to get drunk and have a taco outside.
- 16:22Speaker 1: That's the entire city. You don't have to buy a
- 16:25Speaker 1: plane ticket. Just get drunk, buy a taco, and eat
- 16:30Speaker 1: it in a place that is not enclosed with a
- 16:33Speaker 1: roof because that's all you have to do. But Taco
- 16:37Speaker 1: Bell is so good because it's an idea. It's the
- 16:39Speaker 1: idea of freedom. It's the idea of fuck it. Tacos
- 16:42Speaker 1: are about fuck it. Austin, fuck it. I'm going to
- 16:46Speaker 1: be free. I'm having a taco. I don't care. I'm fun.
- 16:50Speaker 1: I'm fun and flirty. I'm going to have a handheld
- 16:54Speaker 1: crunchy thing because I'm fun and I'm flirty and we're
- 16:58Speaker 1: eating outside because there are no rules. I'm 38 years
- 17:01Speaker 1: old and it's time to start living my life in Austin, Texas.
- 17:06Speaker 1: I want some fucking young dude from UT to go
- 17:09Speaker 1: down on my old gnarled puss with his fucking beer breath,
- 17:14Speaker 1: and I want him to lick my snatch and then
- 17:17Speaker 1: throw his half-card, average-sized cock in and out of me
- 17:21Speaker 1: on this futon in a gentrifying neighborhood, and I want
- 17:26Speaker 1: to come to the sound of gunshots, and then I
- 17:28Speaker 1: want to wake up tomorrow, eat brisket, and do it
- 17:31Speaker 1: all over again. No, thank you. I'm Afro-Latino, and I'm leaving.
- 17:35Speaker 1: I'm truly Afro-Latino. I'm not apologizing for it anymore. I
- 17:40Speaker 1: love Miami. They like me too. They don't give a shit. People,
- 17:45Speaker 1: asses are out. Tits are out. They're like, what is
- 17:48Speaker 1: me too? Throw me into a wall. Fuck me. It's
- 17:52Speaker 1: a sexy city. Austin is sex less. Miami is white
- 17:56Speaker 1: marble floors and cocaine. People trying to fuck each other. Austin,
- 18:00Speaker 1: Texas is a, is the sex in Austin, Texas, and
- 18:04Speaker 1: I've had some of it, it is sad. It's, you
- 18:09Speaker 1: just keep thinking about, one of the guys I went
- 18:11Speaker 1: out with literally said to me, I came out as gay,
- 18:13Speaker 1: my parents did an exorcism on me, but I didn't care,
- 18:16Speaker 1: I was high as shit. So that's the caliber of
- 18:21Speaker 1: human being Another guy I hung out with said, I
- 18:24Speaker 1: came out as gay and my father drove me around
- 18:26Speaker 1: and said, you're going to burn in hell. And I
- 18:28Speaker 1: didn't say anything and he drove me around in his
- 18:30Speaker 1: car and then let me out. So everybody here has
- 18:32Speaker 1: a little bit of baggage. And the sex here is just,
- 18:37Speaker 1: it's that kind of gross, like weird collegiate sex without
- 18:43Speaker 1: any of the heat that you'd imagine young college people
- 18:47Speaker 1: fucking has. It just, it just, it's, it's like, Sex
- 18:53Speaker 1: that is, you're trying to fuck your way into being
- 18:59Speaker 1: someone you're not. Like you're like, because everybody's putting so
- 19:04Speaker 1: much pressure on themselves here to have experiences. Because life
- 19:09Speaker 1: is about me. So when you're hooking up with somebody here,
- 19:14Speaker 1: they're really trying. Have you ever hooked up with someone
- 19:16Speaker 1: who's really trying? Like they're really trying. to a point
- 19:20Speaker 1: where it's like, come, stop it. No one kisses like that.
- 19:25Speaker 1: People are crazy here. They're just really trying to have
- 19:28Speaker 1: this animalistic experience, but it's really, it's not animalistic in
- 19:32Speaker 1: a good way. It's roadkill. It's roadkill sex. Whereas Miami
- 19:38Speaker 1: is sexy. People like me that are international. People look
- 19:42Speaker 1: at me, they don't think American, they think international. That
- 19:46Speaker 1: I'm an international person. I work on my body. I
- 19:49Speaker 1: work on the way I look. I have an international flair.
- 19:54Speaker 1: I will start wearing skin-tight catsuits. I will start wearing
- 20:00Speaker 1: eight-inch heels. I don't care if you don't want to
- 20:02Speaker 1: be my fan anymore. This is going to be my future.
- 20:07Speaker 1: Because I'm out. I'm leaving the world of discussions and
- 20:12Speaker 1: debates and point counterpoint. I'm done with all that shit.
- 20:17Speaker 1: I'm going to put my pussy on the street in
- 20:20Speaker 1: a Balenciaga onesie and probably start smoking crystal. Because this
- 20:26Speaker 1: country's finished, and there's absolutely no point in debating anybody
- 20:31Speaker 1: about fucking anything anymore. Just go out and have some
- 20:34Speaker 1: goddamn fun, but not in Texas. Or not in Austin,
- 20:38Speaker 1: at least. Go to Dallas. Suck off some CFO. But
- 20:43Speaker 1: not here. I love BetterHelp. We talk so much about
- 20:47Speaker 1: mental health in this episode. And what we really need
- 20:50Speaker 1: to do is get ourselves in better shape mentally. So BetterHelp, H-E-L-P.
- 20:55Speaker 1: It is an online service. It offers really great professional counseling.
- 21:00Speaker 1: It's not a crisis line. It's not self-help. It is
- 21:03Speaker 1: professional counseling. It's done securely online. There's a broad range
- 21:07Speaker 1: of expertise available, which may or may not be locally
- 21:09Speaker 1: available in many areas. The service is available for clients worldwide.
- 21:14Speaker 1: You can log into your account when? Any time. Send
- 21:18Speaker 1: a message to your counselor. You'll get timely and thoughtful responses. Plus,
- 21:22Speaker 1: you can schedule weekly video or phone sessions so you
- 21:25Speaker 1: won't ever have to sit in an uncomfortable waiting room,
- 21:28Speaker 1: as with traditional therapy. I hated the waiting room of
- 21:33Speaker 1: my therapist. It's more affordable, Ben, than traditional offline counseling,
- 21:38Speaker 1: and financial aid is available. Better HELP wants you to
- 21:42Speaker 1: start living a happier life today. It's really true. In fact,
- 21:46Speaker 1: so many people have been using BetterHelp. They're adding new
- 21:49Speaker 1: counselors in all 50 states, okay? So just go to betterhelp.com
- 21:56Speaker 1: slash timd. That's betterhelp.com slash timd. And what?
- 22:03Speaker 2: You join over the million people who have taken charge
- 22:06Speaker 2: of their mental health with the help of an experienced professional.
- 22:09Speaker 1: That's right. This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, and Tim
- 22:12Speaker 1: Dillon Show listeners get 10% off their first month at BetterHelp.com
- 22:16Speaker 1: slash Tim D. I love earphones. Don't you, headphones? Oh, yeah.
- 22:22Speaker 2: I like earbuds.
- 22:24Speaker 1: What do you like about them?
- 22:26Speaker 2: Well, you know, as an audio engineer, I really need.
- 22:28Speaker 1: Will you shut up? You're an audio engineer? Technically. What
- 22:33Speaker 1: are you engineering? My screaming?
- 22:35Speaker 2: Yeah, kind of. There's compressors.
- 22:37Speaker 1: What about earbuds?
- 22:40Speaker 2: Well, here's the thing. We fly so much, we need
- 22:44Speaker 2: good pairs of earbuds to listen to things on the go, right?
- 22:48Speaker 2: But we don't want to have a bad quality pair
- 22:50Speaker 2: of headphones or earbuds because then that will damage our
- 22:53Speaker 2: hearing because we need to be very perceptive and we
- 22:55Speaker 2: need to be able to listen to other people so
- 22:57Speaker 2: we can do our job more effectively.
- 22:59Speaker 1: What are you talking about? I like Raycon earbuds because
- 23:04Speaker 1: they give you amazing audio quality wherever you go. Whether
- 23:07Speaker 1: you use them to pump up, wind down, work, or
- 23:09Speaker 1: work out, they'll be useful for anyone on your list.
- 23:12Speaker 1: It's the fucking holidays, dummy. Get Raycon earbuds. They're less
- 23:17Speaker 1: than half the price of other premium audio brands. With
- 23:21Speaker 1: their latest model, you get three new sound profiles to
- 23:24Speaker 1: make sure everything you're listening to sounds its best. with
- 23:27Speaker 1: just the right amount of base. Pure mode, balanced mode,
- 23:31Speaker 1: and base mode. Raycons are available in five stylish colors
- 23:36Speaker 1: so you can pick a perfect one for everyone on
- 23:37Speaker 1: your list. With free shipping and returns, gifting is easier
- 23:42Speaker 1: than ever. The holidays are coming up faster than you think.
- 23:47Speaker 1: Now is the time to knock out that gift list
- 23:49Speaker 1: and avoid the last minute shipping scramble. Especially because right now,
- 23:54Speaker 1: My listeners will get 15% off site-wide with code HOLIDAY
- 23:58Speaker 1: at buyraycon.com slash Tim. Go to buyraycon.com slash Tim and
- 24:04Speaker 1: use the code HOLIDAY, H-O-L-I-D-A-Y. Do you know what you get?
- 24:09Speaker 1: What do you get? 15% off your order.
- 24:12Speaker 2: Wow, that's a good deal.
- 24:13Speaker 1: Whoa, a good deal?
- 24:14Speaker 2: A great deal.
- 24:15Speaker 1: It's a fucking phenomenal deal. I love Raycon earbuds. I
- 24:22Speaker 1: use them. Rogan had that guy on, the COVID guy,
- 24:25Speaker 1: and he made a lot of good points. Dr.
- 24:27Speaker 2: Peter McCullough.
- 24:28Speaker 1: Whatever. And he made some good points. Who cares? Again,
- 24:31Speaker 1: what do we do? We're going to do citations? We're
- 24:33Speaker 1: going to do sources now? Dr. Peter McCullough. Yeah, whatever.
- 24:37Speaker 1: He had that guy on. And he's talking about an
- 24:40Speaker 1: early treatment protocol, which, by the way, I'm all for, right? Sure.
- 24:44Speaker 1: It's weird how they've demonized every... You know, if somebody goes, hey,
- 24:48Speaker 1: I took a hydroxychloroquine or ivermectin and it worked, people go, no,
- 24:52Speaker 1: it didn't. You go, wait a minute. What? These are
- 24:55Speaker 1: the same people that tells you you have to honor
- 24:57Speaker 1: everybody's lived experience if they identify as another gender throughout
- 25:01Speaker 1: the day several times because they're gender fluid. So you
- 25:04Speaker 1: have to honor that. I'm a man at breakfast and
- 25:06Speaker 1: a woman at lunch. But if you take Ivermectin and
- 25:08Speaker 1: it worked and you say that, all of a sudden
- 25:10Speaker 1: your lived experience doesn't mean a whole bunch of shit.
- 25:13Speaker 1: You should shut the fuck up. So it is weird.
- 25:16Speaker 1: That being said... Most people, you can't get on an
- 25:20Speaker 1: early COVID regimen because a lot of people do not
- 25:22Speaker 1: have healthcare. They do not have a doctor. They do
- 25:25Speaker 1: not have a regular doctor that they know and trust.
- 25:27Speaker 1: They do not go to the doctor or hospital because
- 25:30Speaker 1: they're afraid of how much it will cost them. They
- 25:32Speaker 1: also can't take time off at work because all of
- 25:35Speaker 1: these companies like Walmart and, you know, Kellogg's, all the
- 25:39Speaker 1: corporations that conservatives love, they hate Pfizer and Moderna, but
- 25:42Speaker 1: they think it's great that Walmart pays people in Pop-Tarts
- 25:45Speaker 1: and they don't say peep about Kellogg's firing all those
- 25:48Speaker 1: people who who went on strike just so they could
- 25:50Speaker 1: see their kids at Thanksgiving. Yeah, fuck that shit. Keep
- 25:53Speaker 1: making fruit loops or die, okay? So all of these corporations,
- 25:57Speaker 1: by the way, seemingly have an agenda that's not exactly pro-worker.
- 26:02Speaker 1: And nobody cares unless it's Pfizer or Moderna. And nobody's like, hey,
- 26:07Speaker 1: maybe multinational conglomerates, they're in bed with the government. Truly
- 26:14Speaker 1: the most powerful entities to have ever existed in human
- 26:16Speaker 1: history should not, including tech, everything, all of these conglomerates,
- 26:22Speaker 1: should probably not run roughshod over everybody's rights. And people
- 26:28Speaker 1: should have some dignity and a standard of living and
- 26:30Speaker 1: health care. But as soon as you bring that up,
- 26:32Speaker 1: people are like, shut the fuck up. Like your early
- 26:37Speaker 1: COVID protocol would be great. if people went to the
- 26:40Speaker 1: doctor when they were sick instead of showing up to
- 26:43Speaker 1: work because they will be fired if they take a
- 26:46Speaker 1: day off. And they're scared of how much it's going
- 26:50Speaker 1: to cost them. That doesn't mean that there's not some
- 26:53Speaker 1: nefarious profit scheme on the side of Pfizer, but it's
- 26:58Speaker 1: a systemic issue here. It's a little bigger. Mm-hmm. than
- 27:02Speaker 1: just saying like, oh yeah, well people should get on
- 27:05Speaker 1: these things earlier. Sure, yes, people should be less fat.
- 27:09Speaker 1: Totally agree. Let's go back to corporations again. The ones
- 27:12Speaker 1: whose cocks you have jammed in your throat. Who's making
- 27:15Speaker 1: everyone fat? Where's all this food coming from? Is it
- 27:18Speaker 1: falling out of the fucking sky? No, it's corporations poisoning you.
- 27:26Speaker 1: Why not regulate them? What the fucking government sucks, man?
- 27:33Speaker 1: Why not regulate the amount of plastic they can put
- 27:35Speaker 1: in ranch dressing? Because maybe a mother of three whose
- 27:39Speaker 1: husband dropped dead of COVID doesn't have time to read
- 27:43Speaker 1: every fucking salad dressing or fucking cereal box in the
- 27:47Speaker 1: grocery store because she's a little stressed. So perhaps there
- 27:52Speaker 1: should be some regulations. Like Europe, they don't allow this shit.
- 27:55Speaker 1: You can't just put poison in everything like you do
- 27:59Speaker 1: in America. These obese people, they're all fat. Yes, you
- 28:05Speaker 1: go to certain parts of the country, there are food deserts,
- 28:08Speaker 1: meaning there's nowhere to eat except fast food. And the markets,
- 28:13Speaker 1: the food is bad. The produce is brown. They don't
- 28:16Speaker 1: get anything good. It's true. And it's so expensive now
- 28:21Speaker 1: because of inflation. If you have a family of four
- 28:24Speaker 1: or five fucking people, you just can't make everyone a
- 28:27Speaker 1: Waldorf salad. You have to just buy taco meat and
- 28:31Speaker 1: feed it to the kids like dogs in a kennel. No,
- 28:36Speaker 1: inflation doesn't matter. So everyone's on their moral high horse
- 28:41Speaker 1: about fat people have ruined everything. Fat people are largely
- 28:48Speaker 1: the result of a few different things. But one of
- 28:51Speaker 1: them is that society does not do a great job
- 28:57Speaker 1: promoting health. Because they allow, oh, by the way, all
- 29:01Speaker 1: this body positivity shit, it's all the sugar industry. They're
- 29:06Speaker 1: dumping money. They're putting 600 pound people on the cover
- 29:09Speaker 1: of magazines and saying, yes, bitch. And the reason they're
- 29:13Speaker 1: doing that is because they don't want anybody to think
- 29:16Speaker 1: twice about having their, you know, fifth McGriddle of the day.
- 29:23Speaker 1: So you have all of these trends that are converging.
- 29:28Speaker 1: But this idea that, like, corporations are great, except the
- 29:31Speaker 1: two that make a vaccine is a little wild. But
- 29:37Speaker 1: you can't even get into it. So I'm going to Miami. Okay.
- 29:40Speaker 1: to play steel drums. I don't care. I don't give
- 29:44Speaker 1: a fuck. I've made enough money. It's like, hey, I'm fat,
- 29:48Speaker 1: but you don't pay for me being fat. That's the
- 29:51Speaker 1: other thing. You don't pay for me being fat. I
- 29:53Speaker 1: pay for you and your children and all your shit.
- 29:58Speaker 1: I mean, listen, you used to pay for me being fat,
- 30:02Speaker 1: but now you don't. Fat millionaires are not the problem.
- 30:06Speaker 1: Me and Lizzo are not doing this to you. Whatever
- 30:09Speaker 1: your life is, whatever problem you have in your life,
- 30:12Speaker 1: it's not me, it's not Lizzo. Fat poor people, well,
- 30:17Speaker 1: that's another thing. They are perhaps draining you. But you're
- 30:23Speaker 1: draining them. That's the thing. America... If you're not fat,
- 30:29Speaker 1: how many healthy people do you really know? Ten? The
- 30:32Speaker 1: vast majority of people in this country are pill heads, drunks,
- 30:36Speaker 1: fat people, sexual degenerates, dark web pedophiles. Truly. I mean,
- 30:42Speaker 1: let's just go through the different archetypes of people. You're
- 30:46Speaker 1: a pill head, junkie, stoner, dark web pedophile, fat person.
- 30:53Speaker 1: I mean, health is not exactly promoted here. This isn't
- 30:57Speaker 1: like an outdoorsy culture, by the way. Oh, there's too
- 31:01Speaker 1: many fat people. Well, here comes the metaverse. That'll slim
- 31:04Speaker 1: everyone down. I mean, it's not a healthy country. You know,
- 31:11Speaker 1: you can wield the baton against fat people all you want,
- 31:14Speaker 1: but then look at how many drunks are in this country.
- 31:17Speaker 1: How many car accidents? How many problems we have with, like,
- 31:21Speaker 1: fucking prescription drugs and opioids and all these? There's so
- 31:26Speaker 1: many fucking problems in this country. But it's easy to
- 31:30Speaker 1: beat up on fatty, and fatties sometimes should be beaten
- 31:35Speaker 1: up on because they do fat things consistently. But also,
- 31:40Speaker 1: when you go to these food deserts, when you go
- 31:42Speaker 1: to these places where families literally don't have a choice...
- 31:47Speaker 1: but to feed their kids dirt. What do you expect
- 31:50Speaker 1: them to do? You know? You think there's a Whole Foods?
- 31:55Speaker 1: You know, we were in upstate New York. We walked
- 31:57Speaker 1: into the grocery store. Everything was frozen. Everything was preservative-laden,
- 32:04Speaker 1: frozen food that you would defrost. Listen, before I had
- 32:09Speaker 1: a little bit of money, I was broke. Legit broke. Okay? And...
- 32:15Speaker 1: I mean, you cannot, it's not easy to eat healthy
- 32:19Speaker 1: with no money. It really isn't. Now, there are people
- 32:22Speaker 1: that are fighting with me now or getting mad at me,
- 32:25Speaker 1: but it's not. Especially if you're tired and you've worked
- 32:28Speaker 1: your ass off and you just want to eat something
- 32:31Speaker 1: and fall asleep. It is not easy to clip coupons
- 32:36Speaker 1: or go to the market or take advantage of every sale. Now,
- 32:39Speaker 1: especially if you have a family, it's just not easy.
- 32:41Speaker 1: Doesn't mean that it's always justifiable to get in a
- 32:45Speaker 1: fucking bathtub of Haagen-Dazs. But I'm saying that it's a
- 32:49Speaker 1: little more complicated than just going, hey, we need less
- 32:51Speaker 1: fat people. Well, then you need more government regulations. Those
- 32:55Speaker 1: things you fucking hate. Government regulated. Because Pizza Hut is
- 32:59Speaker 1: going to Pizza Hut. Unless you tell them, stop making poison.
- 33:05Speaker 1: If you do not tell them to stop making poison,
- 33:08Speaker 1: they will keep making, because they don't fucking eat it.
- 33:12Speaker 1: The CEOs of these companies, watch Undercover Boss. They don't
- 33:15Speaker 1: even know. The CEO of Pop Boys walks in, he's like,
- 33:17Speaker 1: what is this? Wait, where's the fryer? This is what
- 33:20Speaker 1: we serve people? Undercover Boss stopped even letting the CEOs
- 33:24Speaker 1: in the episodes. They would bring on like the CFO
- 33:27Speaker 1: because the CEO was so horrified that people were eating
- 33:32Speaker 1: the shit. They don't even know. The CEOs of these
- 33:36Speaker 1: companies don't even know what they serve to people. And
- 33:39Speaker 1: when they would go... on Undercover Boss, and they would
- 33:43Speaker 1: walk in, and they would see these people with face
- 33:46Speaker 1: tattoos and, you know, multiple, you know, like, you know,
- 33:52Speaker 1: stints in prison and everything, and they were the employees,
- 33:56Speaker 1: and they'd be a little uncomfortable, and they're like, oh, okay,
- 34:00Speaker 1: and then they would look around at the food, and
- 34:02Speaker 1: they would go, oh, this is what we're doing, and like,
- 34:04Speaker 1: you know, obviously, you know how horrified, you know how
- 34:08Speaker 1: these CEOs live, You know where they go out to eat.
- 34:11Speaker 1: You know the types of people. It's very different than
- 34:14Speaker 1: when they get thrust into that environment and they go
- 34:16Speaker 1: to a Checkers. There was this one where this woman
- 34:19Speaker 1: at Checkers was like, I've worked here 20 years. This
- 34:23Speaker 1: has changed my life. It was one of the saddest.
- 34:25Speaker 1: Try to see if you can find undercover boss Checkers
- 34:28Speaker 1: or rallies, whatever, either one. This woman, it was so sad.
- 34:34Speaker 1: She was like telling the CEO. So the CEOs just,
- 34:37Speaker 1: they couldn't even do it. They were like, we don't
- 34:38Speaker 1: even want to do this. It's a bad PR look
- 34:41Speaker 1: for us. Throw a CFO in. And by the way,
- 34:43Speaker 1: I don't even know if it was a CFO. I
- 34:44Speaker 1: think there was an actor they put in. Because there
- 34:47Speaker 1: was a few early undercover bosses where the CEO was
- 34:50Speaker 1: clearly horrified at what was going on at the company.
- 34:56Speaker 1: They didn't even know. They were like, this is the
- 34:57Speaker 1: food we serve? What? So if you don't regulate that
- 35:02Speaker 1: shit somehow... It's not going to fucking work. Truly.
- 35:07Speaker 2: I'm finding like compilation. Oh, here, I think I found
- 35:09Speaker 2: it on Daily Motion. It's a 51-minute episode. Do you
- 35:12Speaker 2: remember what part it was on?
- 35:13Speaker 1: We're just going to play the full 51, folks, and
- 35:15Speaker 1: I'm going to go out. I mean, do you care anymore?
- 35:20Speaker 1: Can't I just play a 51-minute episode of... Can you
- 35:25Speaker 1: show me some of it? Yeah, yeah, here. I mean,
- 35:27Speaker 1: this is like... You want to talk about the worst
- 35:29Speaker 1: producer in the entire world? So here we go. This
- 35:33Speaker 1: is the CEO of what? Checkers?
- 35:35Speaker 2: Yeah, it says this is the episode, season three, episode four,
- 35:39Speaker 2: Checkers and Rallies.
- 35:40Speaker 1: Yeah, Checkers and Rallies. So you have the CEO of
- 35:42Speaker 1: Checkers and Rallies, who is, let's just say, a dark
- 35:46Speaker 1: web pedophile. I don't know that.
- 35:48Speaker 2: He does look it.
- 35:49Speaker 1: He looks it, and let's just, because we're not going
- 35:52Speaker 1: to use his name, let's just say that and throw
- 35:55Speaker 1: that out there. It may not be true, but I
- 35:57Speaker 1: think chances are it is. By working on the front lines,
- 36:03Speaker 1: you'll see what it really takes to make food fast.
- 36:06Speaker 1: Can't meet those people on hold for that long.
- 36:10Speaker 2: Anyway, no use.
- 36:12Speaker 1: Mark, how do I get five chicken pipe boxes? I
- 36:17Speaker 1: am dying. And for the first time ever, a boss
- 36:21Speaker 1: will be forced to do something so drastic. Right here,
- 36:25Speaker 1: right now, we're going to shut the restaurant down. His
- 36:27Speaker 1: company will never be the same. I just want to work.
- 36:31Speaker 1: I just need a job. So the guy's got to
- 36:33Speaker 1: shut the restaurant down, by the way, because, like, he
- 36:36Speaker 1: gets there and he sees what's going on. He looks horrified.
- 36:40Speaker 1: Which is... People are being poisoned. And they're being served
- 36:44Speaker 1: food that they find on the floor and everything. So
- 36:47Speaker 1: the guys should just shut it down. This is when,
- 36:50Speaker 1: by the way, they had to stop doing Undercover Boss.
- 36:53Speaker 1: Because they're like, literally every episode would be the guy
- 36:56Speaker 1: just shutting the restaurant down. Undercover boss would literally be
- 36:59Speaker 1: the CEO going into the restaurant, calling the cops, and
- 37:04Speaker 1: shutting the restaurant down. He'd have to call the health
- 37:06Speaker 1: department on himself. So they really had to take a
- 37:11Speaker 1: lot more care as to how they did this show.
- 37:15Speaker 1: Because they were like, oh, this is the logical conclusion
- 37:18Speaker 1: of any undercover boss would just be the CEO going,
- 37:21Speaker 1: I can't in good conscience continue to allow this facility
- 37:26Speaker 1: to operate. By the way, don't even call them restaurants.
- 37:29Speaker 1: It's a facility. Arby's is a facility. It's not a restaurant.
- 37:35Speaker 1: So now find the old woman at the end, the
- 37:38Speaker 1: old white lady, and we'll edit this so it's quicker. Yeah,
- 37:42Speaker 1: so I don't know if we can find the exact
- 37:45Speaker 1: part I want. It might be another episode, but we're
- 37:47Speaker 1: going to really try. But this is another one of
- 37:49Speaker 1: my favorite things from this episode where this guy is
- 37:52Speaker 1: clearly trying to fuck this woman who he then says
- 37:57Speaker 1: he's going to mentor her, which is the creepiest thing
- 37:59Speaker 1: in the world. Imagine if the CEO of a company
- 38:03Speaker 1: said to a fry cook, I'm going to mentor you.
- 38:06Speaker 1: What do you think that mentorship entails? He goes, yeah,
- 38:09Speaker 1: I'm going to mentor you. I'm going to pull up
- 38:11Speaker 1: in a parking lot Every Thursday, you come out, you
- 38:16Speaker 1: get my dick wet, and then you go back in
- 38:18Speaker 1: there and make chicken nuggets for people. Listen to how
- 38:21Speaker 1: creepy this guy is. Don't thank me. There's a lot
- 38:24Speaker 1: of people like you that can do a lot more, right?
- 38:27Speaker 1: We're going to put a program together so that every
- 38:31Speaker 1: district manager is going to be a mentor. But I
- 38:36Speaker 1: also want to make sure that you are the first
- 38:40Speaker 1: person mentee in that program. And your mentor is going
- 38:45Speaker 1: to be me. Really?
- 38:51Speaker 2: You're going to mentor me?
- 38:53Speaker 1: Yes.
- 38:53Speaker 2: Into being a good manager?
- 38:55Speaker 1: Yes. Wow. What I want to do right now is
- 38:59Speaker 1: I'm going to promote you into a management and training position.
- 39:03Speaker 1: So you're going to make more compensation than you're making now.
- 39:07Speaker 2: It's a 25% promotion.
- 39:12Speaker 1: Get in my car. Get in my car. Get in
- 39:17Speaker 1: the front seat of my car. There's a new program.
- 39:21Speaker 1: We're going to give you 20%, 25% promotion. So what
- 39:23Speaker 1: do you make now? $ 200 a week? Well, that's going
- 39:24Speaker 1: up by 25%. now I want you to get in
- 39:32Speaker 1: my car because the mentorship is about to begin the
- 39:37Speaker 1: mentorship is about to begin I'm the CEO of a
- 39:41Speaker 1: company and you're a fry cook I have a lot
- 39:44Speaker 1: of wisdom to impart to you about what you can
- 39:47Speaker 1: do to one day become the CEO But first, get
- 39:51Speaker 1: in my car and we're going to start the training.
- 39:55Speaker 1: There's a woman. I mean, we got to research this,
- 39:59Speaker 1: but there's a woman. Was it Checkers?
- 40:03Speaker 2: May have been a different restaurant. Yeah.
- 40:06Speaker 1: Fuck. All right, hold on. Well, we just lost like
- 40:11Speaker 1: three hours of our day at Undercover Boss because we
- 40:14Speaker 1: It is maybe the greatest show ever made, and it
- 40:16Speaker 1: reveals what a disgusting and amoral country that we are. But,
- 40:20Speaker 1: I mean, it was... We looked for that one woman,
- 40:23Speaker 1: but we couldn't find her.
- 40:24Speaker 2: Couldn't find it.
- 40:24Speaker 1: I used to have a bit about Undercover Boss in
- 40:26Speaker 1: my act. It was, uh... If you just need to
- 40:30Speaker 1: binge something, go and watch Undercover Boss. And, uh... You know,
- 40:37Speaker 1: it's a real education. The Versus game is a lot
- 40:39Speaker 1: of fun. I'm having a lot of fun with this.
- 40:41Speaker 1: We are posting questions. Here's what the Versus app is.
- 40:44Speaker 1: A lot of people love to try their hand at chance, right?
- 40:50Speaker 1: They love to try their hand at predicting the future,
- 40:56Speaker 1: seeing what may or may not happen, right?
- 40:59Speaker 2: And playing your buddies while doing so.
- 41:00Speaker 1: Playing your friends, crafting questions, coming up with cool things
- 41:05Speaker 1: and saying, hey... Will Tim Dillon do a podcast with
- 41:07Speaker 1: Kyle Rittenhouse before December 15th, right? That question is going
- 41:11Speaker 1: to be closed tomorrow. Interesting. There's lots of different questions
- 41:17Speaker 1: that I'm going to ask that you can log into
- 41:20Speaker 1: Versus app and bet. I'm very good at predicting the future.
- 41:23Speaker 1: And many people who listen to the podcast know that.
- 41:25Speaker 1: And the CEO of Versus app said to me, we're
- 41:28Speaker 1: so impressed by how correct you've been about literally everything
- 41:31Speaker 1: you've said. We want you... to start posing questions on
- 41:36Speaker 1: the app and seeing if people, if you're right or not,
- 41:41Speaker 1: and by the way, people can win money. Yeah. They
- 41:44Speaker 1: can win money. So that is in and of itself
- 41:49Speaker 1: a fascinating thing that you can do. You can win
- 41:53Speaker 1: money by being correct about things. A lot of people
- 41:57Speaker 1: think they know what's going to happen in the world. Well,
- 41:59Speaker 1: if you really do put that to the test, what
- 42:02Speaker 1: are some of the questions that you've posted, Ben? Because
- 42:04Speaker 1: I know that they've done well. Ben has posted some.
- 42:07Speaker 1: So mine is Ben Avery is good on there. I'm
- 42:09Speaker 1: a verified user on the app. Shut up.
- 42:12Speaker 2: I asked... Will Hasbulla be declared an enemy of the
- 42:15Speaker 2: state of Dagestan?
- 42:17Speaker 1: Interesting.
- 42:17Speaker 2: I posted, will Kyle Rittenhouse upload a photo to social
- 42:21Speaker 2: media with him holding a gun by next week?
- 42:23Speaker 1: Oh.
- 42:23Speaker 2: During the trials, we did some of those. I mean,
- 42:25Speaker 2: you can do a wide array of things on the app.
- 42:28Speaker 2: We've been having a lot of fun on there, I think.
- 42:29Speaker 1: My question is, my new question I'm going to post,
- 42:31Speaker 1: will Hasbulla and Abdurozik actually have this fight? Oh, interesting.
- 42:35Speaker 1: Is this a real fight or is this a troll?
- 42:37Speaker 2: Ooh, you think they'll do it by the new year?
- 42:38Speaker 1: Will Hasbulla and Abdurozik, by the new year... Have this fight.
- 42:46Speaker 1: Or is this a troll? Will these two little Dagestani
- 42:50Speaker 1: dwarfs fight each other or not? Will, this is another one. Okay. Okay.
- 43:01Speaker 1: Will the city of Austin be attacked by terrorists by
- 43:12Speaker 1: the new year? Hey, I'm saying it won't. Prove me
- 43:18Speaker 1: wrong and earn money. So you mean a domestic terrorist?
- 43:21Speaker 1: Prove me wrong and earn money.
- 43:22Speaker 2: All right.
- 43:23Speaker 1: Hey, I'm saying, will a bunch of people with AK-47s
- 43:29Speaker 1: just open fire in downtown Austin? I'm saying it won't happen.
- 43:34Speaker 1: But do you want to prove me wrong and win money?
- 43:37Speaker 1: Versus app. Versus app, baby. What else?
- 43:46Speaker 2: Will the Island Boys overdose by Christmas? How about that?
- 43:49Speaker 1: That's too dark. Too dark? I don't want you doing
- 43:51Speaker 1: those dark ones. I haven't done any that dark. That's
- 43:54Speaker 1: not right to do. It's more a brand for you,
- 43:56Speaker 1: I think. What have they done to us, the Island Boys?
- 44:00Speaker 1: Provide us beautiful music?
- 44:02Speaker 2: But they sold their soul to the devil.
- 44:03Speaker 1: Well, he said that, but I respect him for being
- 44:06Speaker 1: honest about it. How many people have done that that
- 44:08Speaker 1: don't tell you they've sold their soul? That's true.
- 44:14Speaker 2: Your name is at Tim Dillon on there without the J.
- 44:16Speaker 1: Yeah, thank you for following me. What else here? Will
- 44:20Speaker 1: Spotify censor Joe Rogan's latest episode?
- 44:25Speaker 2: Oh, with Peter McCullough?
- 44:25Speaker 1: With Dr. Peter McCullough.
- 44:27Speaker 2: Ooh, that's a good one.
- 44:27Speaker 1: Posting that question immediately, or Ben will do it for
- 44:29Speaker 1: me or get fired.
- 44:34Speaker 2: That's a good one.
- 44:35Speaker 1: That's a great one. Yeah. Will Jesus... Come back from
- 44:46Speaker 1: the dead, buy New Year's, and smite his enemies, destroy
- 44:55Speaker 1: the world, and bring all of his fans and followers
- 45:00Speaker 1: to heaven. I guess you would call them fans and followers. Okay.
- 45:04Speaker 2: You're talking about the rapture.
- 45:06Speaker 1: Yes, will the rapture happen? That's a simpler way to
- 45:10Speaker 1: say it. But I like the Rogan one, the Rogan-McCullough one,
- 45:14Speaker 1: because that is interesting. I'm going to say they will not,
- 45:17Speaker 1: but a lot of people are saying they might. Okay.
- 45:20Speaker 2: A lot of people do questions about Pete Davidson on
- 45:23Speaker 2: the app. Can you think of any Pete Davidson or
- 45:24Speaker 2: Kim K questions?
- 45:25Speaker 1: Not even one can I think of. Okay. There's not
- 45:28Speaker 1: one thing I care to ask. What? I mean, I
- 45:31Speaker 1: don't even know what people are asking. I have no way.
- 45:36Speaker 1: The guy's doing well. Yeah. I mean, what could you
- 45:39Speaker 1: even possibly ask? Will Hasbulla Shabba bombed himself and killed
- 45:53Speaker 1: Katy Perry.
- 45:58Speaker 2: He threatened a woman on Instagram. He threatened her life.
- 46:01Speaker 1: Really?
- 46:02Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 46:03Speaker 1: What did she do?
- 46:04Speaker 2: She posted pictures of his sister, I believe, and he
- 46:08Speaker 2: just went ape on her on live and said he
- 46:09Speaker 2: was going to send people to her house and stuff.
- 46:12Speaker 1: I love him so much. He's such a gangster.
- 46:14Speaker 2: It's his sister. It's family.
- 46:17Speaker 1: Yeah. It was his mother posting the photo. He's like,
- 46:25Speaker 1: I'll kill you. I mean, this is a fun app,
- 46:29Speaker 1: and you can win money. Tell them about how they
- 46:32Speaker 1: win the money.
- 46:33Speaker 2: So how you win the money is when you.
- 46:36Speaker 1: Don't you like money?
- 46:38Speaker 2: So Tim or I will post a question.
- 46:40Speaker 1: That's right.
- 46:41Speaker 2: And then you guess.
- 46:42Speaker 1: You guess.
- 46:43Speaker 2: Yes or no.
- 46:44Speaker 1: Correct.
- 46:44Speaker 2: There's two possible outcomes, right?
- 46:46Speaker 1: No essay answers.
- 46:47Speaker 2: Will Elon Musk be Time Person of the Year or
- 46:49Speaker 2: will he not?
- 46:51Speaker 1: That would have been a good one. Yeah.
- 46:52Speaker 2: I did a Time Person of the.
- 46:53Speaker 1: Year one, too. Which one was it?
- 46:55Speaker 2: I did Will It Be an Athlete or a Media Figure.
- 46:57Speaker 2: It was a media figure.
- 46:58Speaker 1: How much money are you making on this app?
- 47:00Speaker 2: I've made a little bit of money.
- 47:02Speaker 1: I get all of it. I don't understand why you
- 47:05Speaker 1: think you're making money on this thing. I'll kill you.
- 47:08Speaker 2: I think you're making some decent dough.
- 47:13Speaker 1: I'm not making anything, by the way. I'm not making anything.
- 47:17Speaker 1: If people would start participating and following me on Versus app,
- 47:22Speaker 1: then I would start making money.
- 47:23Speaker 2: That's right.
- 47:24Speaker 1: But Ben is making money and I'm not, which is
- 47:27Speaker 1: going to result in me hitting him with my car.
- 47:29Speaker 1: And then I'll ask that question on Versus app. Why
- 47:32Speaker 1: did I hit Ben with my car?
- 47:33Speaker 2: Oh, you know what's a good one we could do?
- 47:35Speaker 2: Will there be another insurrection on January 6th? That could
- 47:38Speaker 2: be a decent one, if there's going to be another.
- 47:40Speaker 2: Ashley Babbitt trends every other day.
- 47:41Speaker 1: Yeah, but no one thinks there's going to be. That's
- 47:43Speaker 1: like the dumbest question I've ever heard in my life.
- 47:47Speaker 1: Literally not one person thinks there's going to be.
- 47:50Speaker 2: Well, I'll say this. I did one where I said,
- 47:52Speaker 2: will Tiger Woods, now that he's out of the hospital,
- 47:54Speaker 2: have a DUI by Friday? And like 100 people voted
- 47:57Speaker 2: yes on my question. Well, it's funny.
- 48:00Speaker 1: It's a funny thing to say. Yeah. But the answer
- 48:03Speaker 1: is he's not going to. Correct, yeah. I mean, probably.
- 48:05Speaker 2: He's wild.
- 48:06Speaker 1: But it's funny because they're having fun. Right. That's right.
- 48:11Speaker 1: First is Zap. Follow us on this.
- 48:15Speaker 2: Win some dough.
- 48:21Speaker 1: I mean, you really are out of control. You really
- 48:27Speaker 1: are out of control. Win some dough? Mm-hmm. That's where
- 48:35Speaker 1: you're at. Yeah. Win some dough. How about participate in...
- 48:42Speaker 1: I like to think of the Versus app There's a
- 48:46Speaker 1: great book called Penetration written by Ignacio Swan about remote viewing.
- 48:52Speaker 1: He was taken to a room by the government and
- 48:54Speaker 1: he could see bases on the moon. He could remote
- 48:57Speaker 1: view other planets. I like to think of the Versus
- 49:00Speaker 1: app as an exercise in kind of a mass ESP.
- 49:07Speaker 1: Do you see what I mean? Mm-hmm. I don't think
- 49:09Speaker 1: of it as just a way to win some dough,
- 49:10Speaker 1: even though you can win some dough. I think of
- 49:12Speaker 1: it as a way to kind of predict things and
- 49:15Speaker 1: kind of be like ESP, like mass, you know? That's
- 49:19Speaker 1: the way I think of it. it.
- 49:21Speaker 2: Well, I'm a food stamp. Oh, so I think I
- 49:23Speaker 2: think about dough and cash and dollar signs.
- 49:26Speaker 1: Well, I I don't doubt that. There's a lot of
- 49:30Speaker 1: different ways to think about it. So so pull out
- 49:34Speaker 1: your phone and go to the app store and download
- 49:36Speaker 1: versus game right now and play my bats. The versus game,
- 49:43Speaker 1: one word with no space. They'll even give you money
- 49:45Speaker 1: towards your first bet with the offer code TIM. That's V-E-R-S-U-S-G-A-M-E,
- 49:52Speaker 1: offer code TIM, for $ 5 towards your first bet. That's
- 49:57Speaker 1: versus game, offer code TIM. I read an article in
- 50:00Speaker 1: the Wall Street Journal about millennials are now supercharging the
- 50:03Speaker 1: housing market. Young people that hated owning things are now
- 50:10Speaker 1: driving like half the transactions in the market now. People
- 50:18Speaker 1: are now warming to the idea of owning a home
- 50:25Speaker 1: in a suburb, probably, that just a few years ago
- 50:31Speaker 1: were in love with the cities. I wonder what happened! Um... But, yeah,
- 50:37Speaker 1: it seems like after the COVID and the riots and the,
- 50:42Speaker 1: you know, because things are getting worse in cities and
- 50:45Speaker 1: maybe it's overstated to a degree, but really a lot
- 50:48Speaker 1: of it is, you know, you hear from people things
- 50:53Speaker 1: are not good and you see it with your own
- 50:54Speaker 1: eyes and then there are people that will accuse anyone
- 50:57Speaker 1: that talks about crime like, oh, you're a fucking, that's
- 51:03Speaker 1: some boomer Fox News shit. That you're just, you know,
- 51:08Speaker 1: bringing up that some dude climbed over the fucking fence
- 51:12Speaker 1: and scared your wife. So what? And, but people are really,
- 51:21Speaker 1: people are really like, you know, there's mentally ill people
- 51:24Speaker 1: on the street. Many of them have weapons. Many of
- 51:28Speaker 1: them are unhappy. They're not well. And they may or
- 51:33Speaker 1: may not attack you. And this is becoming less and
- 51:39Speaker 1: less fun. It's not as fun as it used to
- 51:45Speaker 1: be because there were fewer of them. You shouldn't have none.
- 51:50Speaker 1: You need a few, a sprinkling, if you will. But
- 51:54Speaker 1: when you have too many, somebody getting slashed isn't even
- 51:59Speaker 1: a novelty anymore. It becomes, you know, routine. And I
- 52:05Speaker 1: think that People are getting a little wary of that
- 52:12Speaker 1: type of living environment. Doesn't mean that those conditions will continue,
- 52:20Speaker 1: although they probably will. But this idea that anyone concerned
- 52:26Speaker 1: about safety, especially if you have a family, anyone concerned
- 52:32Speaker 1: about their physical safety is ridiculous. They're ridiculous. It's usually
- 52:41Speaker 1: put out there by people who are doing very well
- 52:47Speaker 1: and not in a position to worry and maybe don't
- 52:52Speaker 1: have kids, don't have a family, and aren't really worried
- 52:59Speaker 1: about those things. But you hear these stories about... And
- 53:07Speaker 1: I think there's a lot of problems. It's not, obviously,
- 53:11Speaker 1: we've had a very strange 12-month period and even longer
- 53:20Speaker 1: than 12-month period in America where people are, it's becoming
- 53:27Speaker 1: more and more obvious that people cannot have logical, discussions
- 53:36Speaker 1: with each other about certain topics because they are so
- 53:41Speaker 1: emotionally charged that people don't really care about facts or
- 53:48Speaker 1: data or statistics. They're more concerned with saying the right
- 53:57Speaker 1: thing or they're being very careful about conversations but one
- 54:03Speaker 1: of those conversations is about crime that's going up in
- 54:09Speaker 1: a lot of these cities and a lot of vulnerable
- 54:12Speaker 1: people uh poor people old people women people that rely
- 54:19Speaker 1: on public transportation people that work late hours people that
- 54:24Speaker 1: you know people that don't live in the suburbs, don't
- 54:27Speaker 1: live in gated communities, aren't millionaires, a lot of those
- 54:31Speaker 1: people bear the brunt of that spike in crime. And
- 54:37Speaker 1: a lot of this coincided with this idea that if
- 54:40Speaker 1: you got rid of funding for police and then reallocated
- 54:44Speaker 1: it to community reinvestment or education or mental health, all
- 54:49Speaker 1: of those things are worthwhile things. But if you had
- 54:53Speaker 1: less police... and less funding for police, and you were
- 54:58Speaker 1: able to take this money and give it to these
- 55:01Speaker 1: other things, perhaps that'd be a long-term benefit. I don't
- 55:04Speaker 1: really know. But in the short term, it's been a problem.
- 55:09Speaker 1: If you look at facts. If you care about any,
- 55:11Speaker 1: you know, any type of.
- 55:13Speaker 2: Sullivan shared this statistic the other day. I'm sure you
- 55:15Speaker 2: saw it.
- 55:16Speaker 1: If the U.S.
- 55:16Speaker 2: Still hospitalized, it's mentally ill at the same rate as
- 55:18Speaker 2: it did in 1955. its mental health institutions would house
- 55:21Speaker 2: almost 1.1 million people any given day, and instead they
- 55:24Speaker 2: house fewer than 50,000 patients now.
- 55:26Speaker 1: I know seven people that I could name that are
- 55:29Speaker 1: friends of mine that.
- 55:30Speaker 2: Should be institutionalized. And I'm dead serious.
- 55:35Speaker 1: Like, seven or eight people that I know that should
- 55:40Speaker 1: not have the ability to plan their own day. They
- 55:43Speaker 1: should have to... They should be constrained by a facility. No, listen,
- 55:54Speaker 1: it's a problem. That doesn't mean you can give cops
- 55:57Speaker 1: a blank check to do whatever the fuck they want,
- 55:59Speaker 1: but very honestly, people in L.A., people are talking about
- 56:05Speaker 1: the fact that they feel less safe. Yeah, not 40-year-old
- 56:10Speaker 1: open mic stand-up comedians who live on floors and don't
- 56:13Speaker 1: have any money or families and are on Twitter just,
- 56:17Speaker 1: you know, trying to tweet their way to a sandwich
- 56:20Speaker 1: because they're broke. They're not talking about it. But people with, like,
- 56:25Speaker 1: skin in the game are discussing it. Of varying political affiliations.
- 56:32Speaker 1: Left-wing people, right-wing people, people are going, yeah, things aren't good.
- 56:37Speaker 1: And I don't really know what the answer is because
- 56:44Speaker 1: my mother's mentally ill. And I have a lot of,
- 56:46Speaker 1: I have a feeling that, you know, it's not enough
- 56:55Speaker 1: to like, you have to figure out a way to
- 57:00Speaker 1: identify people that have these problems and and get them care,
- 57:06Speaker 1: get them some type of help, get them off the street,
- 57:11Speaker 1: you know, get them off drugs, have them not be
- 57:17Speaker 1: able to get a hold of knives and guns and,
- 57:21Speaker 1: you know, things that can ruin the day. I mean,
- 57:25Speaker 1: it's not easy. You're dealing with, and more and more
- 57:29Speaker 1: people are going crazy every day More and more people
- 57:33Speaker 1: are losing their minds. So we've just got a bad
- 57:37Speaker 1: situation where the culture pushes more and more people off
- 57:42Speaker 1: the cliff. And then those people then turn around and
- 57:48Speaker 1: start committing acts of violence because they are insane. A
- 57:54Speaker 1: culture of horrible food, prescription drugs, an over-medicated and under-medicated, both,
- 58:03Speaker 1: culture of people that are self-medicating, a culture of high
- 58:08Speaker 1: levels of stress, work till you drop dead, no healthcare,
- 58:15Speaker 1: no intervention, early intervention when people are having these mental
- 58:19Speaker 1: health problems, a culture that prides itself on like, Hustle
- 58:23Speaker 1: and grind and fucking figure it out, man. You just
- 58:27Speaker 1: gotta tough your way through it. It pushes people off
- 58:32Speaker 1: a cliff. And then those people are going to end
- 58:38Speaker 1: up in American cities, insane, and they're gonna kill you.
- 58:47Speaker 1: Perhaps that should make you think twice about what we've
- 58:54Speaker 1: set up here. A system that is designed so that
- 58:59Speaker 1: a fair amount of people every year are going to
- 59:02Speaker 1: become homeless, they're going to lose benefits, and whatever mental
- 59:08Speaker 1: health issue they have is gonna be Mm-hmm. Some of them,
- 59:21Speaker 1: not all of them, some of them are going to
- 59:24Speaker 1: lose their minds and they're going to strike out. And
- 59:30Speaker 1: you're going to see more and more acts of domestic terrorism.
- 59:36Speaker 1: You know? You'll see these people who are desperate. They
- 59:41Speaker 1: have nothing to lose. They're going to... pick up arms.
- 59:47Speaker 1: I mean, and I don't know what this had to
- 59:50Speaker 1: do with because there was a legendary Mexican guy that
- 59:54Speaker 1: died at the Hollywood Walk of Fame and a guy
- 59:57Speaker 1: just started shooting out of his window. We had the
- 1:00:02Speaker 1: Waukesha massacre where that SUV that was not being driven,
- 1:00:06Speaker 1: it was a self-driving SUV, killed all those people. But no,
- 1:00:11Speaker 1: it was a black guy that was steeped in anti-white
- 1:00:16Speaker 1: kind of racist language, right?
- 1:00:19Speaker 2: Yeah, it's not the mainstream narrative, really.
- 1:00:21Speaker 1: No, the mainstream narrative is a car decided to mow
- 1:00:26Speaker 1: over children in Wisconsin. But there was a guy who
- 1:00:30Speaker 1: was like very, from what I know, seemed to be
- 1:00:36Speaker 1: a radical, and the ideology that radicalized him was an
- 1:00:40Speaker 1: ideology that was kind of like, hey, it was dehumanizing
- 1:00:44Speaker 1: to white people. White people are all out to get you,
- 1:00:49Speaker 1: trying to kill you, evil. Well, if you say that
- 1:00:52Speaker 1: about any group of people and somebody believes it, they're
- 1:00:55Speaker 1: going to do horrible things like drive a car through
- 1:00:59Speaker 1: a parade. Now, it is not popular with the media
- 1:01:02Speaker 1: because the media likes to play footsie every now and
- 1:01:05Speaker 1: then with that ideology as well. Because it's fun, it
- 1:01:09Speaker 1: revs everyone up, it gets some clicks, just like they
- 1:01:13Speaker 1: did after 9-11, where it was Muslims that they were
- 1:01:17Speaker 1: talking about. And they would have all these pieces about
- 1:01:22Speaker 1: Islam and this and that. And, you know, there were
- 1:01:28Speaker 1: radicals that were white people. that would then go and
- 1:01:32Speaker 1: commit acts, not a ton of them, but there was
- 1:01:35Speaker 1: a few people that would then commit anti-Muslim hate crimes,
- 1:01:41Speaker 1: anti-Chinese hate crimes, whatever. Why wouldn't you have an anti-white
- 1:01:47Speaker 1: hate crime? Why wouldn't you have that if the person
- 1:01:51Speaker 1: is being motivated by that? The idea, I guess, is
- 1:01:55Speaker 1: that the media doesn't think that's real, or maybe doesn't
- 1:01:58Speaker 1: think that they've ever stoked that type of feeling ever,
- 1:02:02Speaker 1: or maybe they don't think that it's widespread enough, which
- 1:02:05Speaker 1: I don't think it's widespread. I don't think it's an epidemic. Right.
- 1:02:09Speaker 1: But I don't think hate crimes against anyone are an
- 1:02:11Speaker 1: epidemic when you look at the numbers. They're just not
- 1:02:13Speaker 1: happening in mass. They're just not. But this guy.
- 1:02:18Speaker 2: It showed he had praised Hitler, backed Black Lives Matter,
- 1:02:21Speaker 2: and called for violence against white people. So the mainstream narrative,
- 1:02:24Speaker 2: they don't want to discredit BLM and stuff like that.
- 1:02:27Speaker 2: So they kind of just, it feels like they kind
- 1:02:29Speaker 2: of just back off of it a little bit.
- 1:02:31Speaker 1: It's very hard for the alt, right? Because it's like,
- 1:02:33Speaker 1: fuck white people. And then he praises Hitler and they're like, well, well,
- 1:02:38Speaker 1: this is tough. This is tough. But you're going to
- 1:02:44Speaker 1: see that more and more, right? Because people are mentally ill. Yeah.
- 1:02:50Speaker 1: They're being let out on bail. These bail rules are interesting. And,
- 1:02:55Speaker 1: you know, I don't think people like Kalief Browder, who
- 1:02:59Speaker 1: can't make bail, should die in Rikers Island because he
- 1:03:01Speaker 1: stole a backpack. Right. But, you know, what did this
- 1:03:03Speaker 1: guy do? He tried to murder his wife?
- 1:03:06Speaker 2: He ran over his ex-wife previously.
- 1:03:08Speaker 1: And then how long?
- 1:03:09Speaker 2: He's also a pedophile.
- 1:03:10Speaker 1: And then he was out of jail when? In a
- 1:03:12Speaker 1: few days? Yeah.
- 1:03:13Speaker 2: A cash bail of $ 1, 000. That might be a little
- 1:03:16Speaker 2: light for running over the wife. He had allegedly punched
- 1:03:20Speaker 2: the mother of his child in the face early last
- 1:03:21Speaker 2: month and then drove over her, leaving tire marks on
- 1:03:24Speaker 2: her leg.
- 1:03:24Speaker 1: A thousand dollars for driving over a woman seems light,
- 1:03:31Speaker 1: to be honest, just from a purely financial standpoint. A G,
- 1:03:37Speaker 1: like you ran over, listen, punching her in the face
- 1:03:40Speaker 1: all day, that's a G. That's a G. Punch her
- 1:03:44Speaker 1: in the face, you're out with a G. I'm for that.
- 1:03:49Speaker 1: She's popping off. You're popping off. Things get heavy. One pop,
- 1:03:54Speaker 1: you don't break her nose. You don't do anything like that.
- 1:03:57Speaker 1: You hit her once. Again, I am not for that,
- 1:04:00Speaker 1: but I understand 1,000 bucks a G. Hey, but if
- 1:04:04Speaker 1: you run her over with a car, that has to
- 1:04:07Speaker 1: be at least $ 3, 000, right? Yeah. If you run over
- 1:04:12Speaker 1: the mother of your child with a car... you should
- 1:04:16Speaker 1: have to pay at least $ 3, 000 to get out of
- 1:04:20Speaker 1: jail and do it again. If you really want to
- 1:04:24Speaker 1: run over the mother of your child again with a car,
- 1:04:30Speaker 1: it should cost you $ 3, 000 at minimum. And the problem
- 1:04:38Speaker 1: with not paying these low bail numbers is that people
- 1:04:42Speaker 1: get out and they do it again. Mm-hmm. And this guy,
- 1:04:47Speaker 1: this demon, went and killed a bunch of people in Wisconsin.
- 1:04:51Speaker 1: And people will listen to this. They'll go, no, well,
- 1:04:55Speaker 1: the bail system's unfair. It may be unfair. It's also
- 1:04:59Speaker 1: unfair to be walking in a Christmas parade and get
- 1:05:02Speaker 1: slaughtered by a maniac in his car. That is also unfair.
- 1:05:09Speaker 1: So in between those two extremes, you'd want to create
- 1:05:12Speaker 1: a system that makes it harder for a violent psychopath
- 1:05:18Speaker 1: to go back out and do the thing. He just
- 1:05:22Speaker 1: did it. He just ran over somebody with a car.
- 1:05:26Speaker 2: Five days previous.
- 1:05:27Speaker 1: Five days ago. Mm-hmm. No, you don't understand! Again, are these,
- 1:05:37Speaker 1: am I having political, is this a political ideology I'm espousing?
- 1:05:43Speaker 1: I'm just talking like a human being would talk. And
- 1:05:48Speaker 1: you people impose your politics on it because you're insane.
- 1:05:55Speaker 1: But I'm having a discussion about Like I would talk
- 1:05:57Speaker 1: to anybody going, yeah, I get it. People getting thrown
- 1:06:01Speaker 1: in debtor's prison or whatever, the equivalent of that over
- 1:06:06Speaker 1: parking tickets is fucking absurd. That's no good. Guy who
- 1:06:11Speaker 1: runs over a woman with his car, being let out
- 1:06:14Speaker 1: immediately on a bail of a G, goes and does,
- 1:06:22Speaker 1: commits an act of terrorism a week later, That's a problem.
- 1:06:29Speaker 1: Figure that out. It's not political. I don't think the
- 1:06:33Speaker 1: idea that you don't want people climbing in your house
- 1:06:37Speaker 1: to kill you is a political statement. If you say,
- 1:06:43Speaker 1: I'm against people climbing over my fence and breaking into
- 1:06:49Speaker 1: my house to kill me, I don't go, oh, yeah! Yeah!
- 1:06:54Speaker 1: You must be a right-wing nut. That's not political to me.
- 1:07:00Speaker 1: Those are not political statements. You know? I'd rather my
- 1:07:06Speaker 1: family not get murdered. I don't turn around and go,
- 1:07:09Speaker 1: must be a libertarian. I just go, oh, it's a
- 1:07:11Speaker 1: father or a mother who doesn't want their family to
- 1:07:16Speaker 1: experience a home invasion. And this is why the Democrats
- 1:07:21Speaker 1: are going to lose again because the idea that this
- 1:07:24Speaker 1: shit is in any way political and isn't just rational
- 1:07:31Speaker 1: is crazy. It's not political to want to preserve the
- 1:07:37Speaker 1: safety of yourself and the people you care about to
- 1:07:41Speaker 1: the extent that you can. It's not political. You know,
- 1:07:45Speaker 1: it's just what it is. That's why I'm excited about
- 1:07:51Speaker 1: violence in only one city. And I'm going to guess
- 1:07:55Speaker 1: which one. It's the one that I'm in right now.
- 1:07:58Speaker 1: Because it is a violent city. It is a violent hellscape.
- 1:08:04Speaker 1: Other than the fact that it's completely devoid of culture,
- 1:08:07Speaker 1: interesting people. The only interesting people here are psychopaths. Many
- 1:08:13Speaker 1: of them billionaires. But it's also a city that is
- 1:08:17Speaker 1: very violent. And people getting shot, stabbed. It is a dirty,
- 1:08:24Speaker 1: filthy bloodbath. Or as Chris Hedges would say, a bacchanal.
- 1:08:34Speaker 1: He loves that word. The American bacchanal.
- 1:08:37Speaker 2: It means like an orgy party?
- 1:08:39Speaker 1: Yes. Something in that vein. Yeah. I want you to
- 1:08:43Speaker 1: go watch 20-somethings Austin. By the way. To say that
- 1:08:48Speaker 1: we have raised the least interesting, least capable, most basic
- 1:08:56Speaker 1: generation of human beings to have ever... I'm more excited
- 1:09:00Speaker 1: about the Zoomers, the ones that are even younger, the
- 1:09:03Speaker 1: ones that are nihilists. Ranboo. Yeah, the kids from Ranboo.
- 1:09:10Speaker 1: I read an article about the Minecraft kids, and... Who
- 1:09:14Speaker 1: is it? There's like, there's Dream, he's a mystery, nobody
- 1:09:19Speaker 1: knows who he is, he's got a mask, and he's
- 1:09:21Speaker 1: the biggest Minecraft YouTuber on Earth, and then he's got
- 1:09:26Speaker 1: a collection of friends that are all like multi-millionaires, and
- 1:09:31Speaker 1: they all have millions of followers, and one of them's
- 1:09:33Speaker 1: name is Ranboo, Ranboo, and he wears a mask, and
- 1:09:37Speaker 1: it's kind of hilarious. And another one's name is Tubbo,
- 1:09:41Speaker 1: but he's not that fat. He's British. British. And they
- 1:09:44Speaker 1: just play Minecraft all day. And the kids give them money.
- 1:09:48Speaker 1: And good for them. Hey, get it while you can.
- 1:09:54Speaker 1: Good for them. I have more faith in that generation
- 1:09:57Speaker 1: than whatever the hell. And I don't know if it's
- 1:10:00Speaker 1: technically a different generation, but the 20-somethings Austin, I mean
- 1:10:04Speaker 1: these motherfuckers, It is just grotesque. One guy, the stand-up
- 1:10:11Speaker 1: comic who's not a comedian, in any discernible way, he's not.
- 1:10:17Speaker 1: And he says to this girl who went to Berkeley,
- 1:10:19Speaker 1: he goes, oh, they're on a date. He goes, oh,
- 1:10:21Speaker 1: so you went to Berkeley, so you're a lot smarter
- 1:10:24Speaker 1: than me. And she goes, yes, yes, I am. At
- 1:10:26Speaker 1: that point, I would have grabbed her by the throat.
- 1:10:28Speaker 1: I would have grabbed her by the throat. Okay? Truly.
- 1:10:33Speaker 1: I would have grabbed her by the throat. And I
- 1:10:36Speaker 1: would have said, listen to me, you cunt. I could
- 1:10:39Speaker 1: crush your larynx right now. Do you understand me? I'd
- 1:10:44Speaker 1: look her right in the eyes. I could crush your
- 1:10:47Speaker 1: fucking larynx right now. Who's smart now? It's a good show.
- 1:10:56Speaker 1: If you watch it, as I have. Now, before we
- 1:11:02Speaker 1: leave here, and we will never really speak of this
- 1:11:04Speaker 1: place again once we are done. Because I know people
- 1:11:10Speaker 1: are probably sick of it already. I'm sick of it,
- 1:11:12Speaker 1: and I'm here. Do you want to say anything nice
- 1:11:17Speaker 1: about the Austin that you remember? The Richard Linklater films,
- 1:11:21Speaker 1: the Alamo Drafthouse films? The pork ribs.
- 1:11:25Speaker 2: Yeah, Barton Springs used to be awesome. Do you mean
- 1:11:28Speaker 2: back when it was before people moved here?
- 1:11:30Speaker 1: Yeah. That old Austin? I don't know. Nick Mullen lived
- 1:11:32Speaker 1: here and liked it, right? Or did he like it?
- 1:11:34Speaker 1: I don't know.
- 1:11:35Speaker 2: I don't know.
- 1:11:35Speaker 1: I think he did.
- 1:11:36Speaker 2: He probably did, right?
- 1:11:38Speaker 1: He said to me years ago, it sucks. And I
- 1:11:40Speaker 1: didn't realize how right he was. But he's right.
- 1:11:43Speaker 2: Yeah, back in the day, you go to Barton Springs,
- 1:11:45Speaker 2: there's no line. You go to Hutt's Hamburgers, which is
- 1:11:47Speaker 2: now like a new Italian place. Like all those old
- 1:11:50Speaker 2: spots are just gone and people can't afford it anymore.
- 1:11:53Speaker 2: And you've noticed this as well. It's as expensive as L.A.
- 1:11:55Speaker 2: to live out here. So it's just, it's all done.
- 1:11:58Speaker 1: It's expensive to live here.
- 1:11:59Speaker 2: I mean, how long were we in traffic today? Just
- 1:12:01Speaker 2: trying to go three miles.
- 1:12:02Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, you did it. You've created what you want.
- 1:12:07Speaker 1: You want hell? You got it. You know? Yeah. But again,
- 1:12:13Speaker 1: this idea of this city is being put out there.
- 1:12:19Speaker 1: It's being put forth by a guy with like a
- 1:12:22Speaker 1: trillion dollars telling everyone how good it is, that he
- 1:12:26Speaker 1: loves it. Well, maybe his experience here is different than yours.
- 1:12:32Speaker 1: Is that possible? Is it possible that the guy with
- 1:12:35Speaker 1: his own spaceship... may be experiencing this place differently than
- 1:12:42Speaker 1: you are. Maybe. But the people that move here deserve it.
- 1:12:49Speaker 1: It's not like a rare blood disease. This is something
- 1:12:52Speaker 1: you choose and you deserve. And if you come here,
- 1:12:57Speaker 1: no matter what happens, you get shot, you get stabbed,
- 1:13:02Speaker 1: you work, you flounder as a barista and strum a
- 1:13:04Speaker 1: guitar in some modern looking barn they've put up all
- 1:13:10Speaker 1: these new houses look like modern barns okay and they
- 1:13:15Speaker 1: should they should do in them what they used to
- 1:13:17Speaker 1: do in old barns which is just club dead animals
- 1:13:21Speaker 1: you know animals that were dying there was no more
- 1:13:24Speaker 1: use for my point is My point is, this dog sucks. Stop.
- 1:13:35Speaker 1: Why does it breathe like this?
- 1:13:37Speaker 2: She just licks too much of her hair and then
- 1:13:39Speaker 2: coughs it up like a cat.
- 1:13:40Speaker 1: Why does she do it?
- 1:13:41Speaker 2: She's just a very nervous, neurotic animal. She used to
- 1:13:46Speaker 2: be in a field somewhere.
- 1:13:47Speaker 1: That's the title of the episode, Nervous Neurotic Animal. Because
- 1:13:54Speaker 1: she's not the only nervous, neurotic animal in this zip code.
- 1:14:01Speaker 1: She was better in L.A. You brought her here. Now
- 1:14:05Speaker 1: she's trying to be cool and hip. She's trying to
- 1:14:09Speaker 1: fucking read books that she thinks will make her sound cool.
- 1:14:15Speaker 1: She's trying to order things like, you know, like different
- 1:14:20Speaker 1: types of, you know, drinks from her favorite mixologist. It's
- 1:14:28Speaker 1: a grotesquerie. But it's really one of our last episodes.
- 1:14:32Speaker 1: We have a few more. Episodes from here, we're going
- 1:14:34Speaker 1: to try. We're not going to be back in the
- 1:14:36Speaker 1: studio until January. People have to know that. They have
- 1:14:40Speaker 1: to understand that. They have to process that in their
- 1:14:43Speaker 1: fucking head. You're not going to see me until January,
- 1:14:48Speaker 1: but then you're going to see us in a brand
- 1:14:50Speaker 1: new studio. How about that? Unless the Minecraft kids come
- 1:14:54Speaker 1: and save us. Let's go work for them. Let's just
- 1:14:59Speaker 1: go work for them.
- 1:15:00Speaker 2: I'd work for Tubbo. Tubbo, Rambo, Rambo.
- 1:15:03Speaker 1: Dude, what if you left this podcast to go work
- 1:15:05Speaker 1: for Rambo?
- 1:15:11Speaker 2: Just a British psychopath wearing a mask.
- 1:15:13Speaker 1: Yeah, what if you just... Well, I think he has
- 1:15:15Speaker 1: a thingy, whatever, has a problem with his own face. Oh,
- 1:15:17Speaker 1: I feel bad now. Well, it looks fine, but he
- 1:15:19Speaker 1: doesn't think it does. I don't know. It was in
- 1:15:20Speaker 1: the article or whatever. The point is, I just think
- 1:15:23Speaker 1: if you came to me and you went, listen, I...
- 1:15:27Speaker 1: I've been thinking I really enjoyed what we've built and
- 1:15:30Speaker 1: the time we've spent together, but I'm going to work
- 1:15:34Speaker 1: for someone else. And I'm like, who? And you're like, Ranboo.
- 1:15:37Speaker 1: And I'm like, the child Minecraft streamer? You're like, yes.
- 1:15:44Speaker 1: And I'm like, okay. You win some, you lose some. TimDeLaComedy.com.
- 1:15:50Speaker 1: We've only got a few more dates left. Sacramento Late Show,
- 1:15:53Speaker 1: grab tickets to that. San Francisco, a few tickets left.
- 1:15:56Speaker 1: Garden City, Idaho. Cancel the late show. Nobody bought tickets.
- 1:15:59Speaker 1: Sorry about that. There is standing room at the first show.
- 1:16:02Speaker 1: We'll be able to get everybody in. You know, who
- 1:16:05Speaker 1: knew I didn't have 20,000 fans in Boise, Idaho? Who knew? Yeah.
- 1:16:10Speaker 1: You know, my big markets are New York and Chicago
- 1:16:12Speaker 1: and Philly and Tampa and Dallas and Miami and places
- 1:16:15Speaker 1: where people live.
- 1:16:17Speaker 2: And San Fran. And then Toronto. Let's not forget New
- 1:16:20Speaker 2: Year's Eve.
- 1:16:21Speaker 1: Toronto's amazing. New Year's Eve, Toronto, baby. Grab those tickets. TimDillaComedy.com.
- 1:16:26Speaker 1: We're going to go out. And we're going to have
- 1:16:29Speaker 1: a fun. Do you know what we've got planned for
- 1:16:31Speaker 1: that show?
- 1:16:32Speaker 2: Which show?
- 1:16:33Speaker 1: Toronto? Yeah, I'm doing a full set. Okay. About a
- 1:16:37Speaker 1: little under an hour. Okay. And then Michaela Peters is
- 1:16:39Speaker 1: coming out to kill her father on stage. Good night, everyone.