Latest / Beyond Limits With Olivia Marie / How To Be The Exception To The Rule

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How To Be The Exception To The Rule · Beyond Limits With Olivia Marie

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to Beyond Limits, the podcast designed to unlock your highest potential with powerful strategies, energetic frequencies, and mindset shifts to create a limitless life.
• 0:12
  SPEAKER_00: Each episode dives deep into what it really takes to build a life and business beyond the ordinary standard.
• 0:19
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• 0:25
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• 0:31
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• 0:34
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• 0:38
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• 0:43
  SPEAKER_00: Tune into the Beyond Limits podcast and step into all that is possible.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_00: We are talking about how to be the exception to every rule.
• 0:53
  SPEAKER_00: Now, if you're listening or watching this, you've always known that you were a little different, right?
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_00: There is something in you that has watched the world differently.
• 1:02
  SPEAKER_00: You've questioned the rules, the limits, you probably feel things very deeply, you see through things quickly, all of that.
• 1:11
  SPEAKER_00: You've even always challenged probably what was like normal because you know you weren't meant to blend in.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_00: You were born to become a mirror for other people to remember themselves.
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_00: So in order to be the exception to every rule, right, is this dichotomy, this paradox of blending in isn't strategy, right?
• 1:30
  SPEAKER_00: It's survival.
• 1:31
  SPEAKER_00: So when you are shrinking, not because you were small, but because you really got good at fitting into rooms that were too small for you, you end up being digestible.
• 1:41
  unknown: Right.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_00: But if you want to be the exception to the rule, you cannot operate in the same way that the rules apply to those following them.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_00: But right now, you do things that sound like other people and you wonder why it doesn't move, or you water down your frequency because your light was too bright, or you thought your light was too bright.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_00: But when you micromanage yourself, right?
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_00: And you micromanage your light and your power, you might call it being strategic.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_00: But what you're doing is that you're actually protecting the parts of you that learned, if I'm too different, I might be alone.
• 2:10
  SPEAKER_00: And this is something I have been different since I was a little girl.
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_00: People were telling me I'm lit different since I was since I can remember.
• 2:19
  SPEAKER_00: And so when that gets wired in of like, well, I'm different.
• 2:23
  SPEAKER_00: If I'm different, I'll be alone, right?
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_00: We have a very primal tribal response in our nervous system.
• 2:28
  SPEAKER_00: Then you end up kind of dimming yourself down, not shining your light as bright, but then you're craving more.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_00: And so it ends up being this suffering for you where you want more, you're craving it, you know you're the exception, but you can't quite let yourself be like a supernova and be the exception to the rule.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_00: Because in order to be the exception, you've stopped blending in.
• 2:49
  SPEAKER_00: So when we speak about like the nervous system of like a woman who's like a supernova, when you hold your full frequency without flinching and you stop negotiating with reality, you stop essentially allow yourself to be that bright, to shine that light.
• 3:03
  SPEAKER_00: You know, people say you can't have it all, you know, but your nervous system is like, well, I am built for this.
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_00: You know, people say, Oh, balance, and you're like, I like to expand.
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_00: You know, people say you have to pick, you can either have money or love or peace, but you can't have it all.
• 3:16
  SPEAKER_00: You're like, why would I choose?
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_00: And that's a very supernova frequency.
• 3:20
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, supernova, we think about like the star, the bursting, it's like light, light, light, light, light, light, light.
• 3:25
  SPEAKER_00: They they are for sure the the anomalies in the universe.
• 3:29
  SPEAKER_00: But if you feel like, well, you can't have the super successful business, and you can't have the love or you know, the partner that adores you and honors you, and you can't have a nervous system that is calm and regulated, and you can't have things that are like beautiful, all these things, you end up trying to pretend that you're not that big.
• 3:48
  SPEAKER_00: To be the exception to the rule, you have to stop pretending like your bigness is a burden.
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_00: And I even had a realization with this in the last couple of weeks of oh, where I need to actually shine my light even more, where I need to like allow that supernova to shine.
• 4:02
  SPEAKER_00: Because when you do, and every time I I've done this and I realize, oh, I can shine a bit more, oh, I can shine a bit more.
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_00: The most extraordinary things have happened.
• 4:11
  SPEAKER_00: But right now, what's happening is you're creating this invisible cage, right?
• 4:14
  SPEAKER_00: Imagine like you are a bird in a cage, and one day you realize that the door is open, and it's always been open, right?
• 4:21
  SPEAKER_00: And so you leave, you soar, you expand, but then you come back to the bird cage and you come back and tell everyone else.
• 4:27
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, yeah, this is somehow sometimes how I feel.
• 4:30
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, you can do all this, and the world is limitless, and everything's an illusion, and you just have to regulate your nervous system and you can have all the things, and it's all how you perceive, and like this is all a hologram.
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_00: And they stare at you blankly and they're like, What?
• 4:44
  SPEAKER_00: They're like, uh, she knows she's she's no, but that's that's not possible.
• 4:49
  SPEAKER_00: Or they'll they'll make excuses.
• 4:50
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, she she's just lucky.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_00: She doesn't get it.
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_00: And they they look at you sideways.
• 4:56
  SPEAKER_00: Because if your flight is real, then they have to face that their cage is a choice.
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_00: And so your walking out threatens their comfort, not because you're doing anything wrong, but because your freedom makes them question why they're still waiting for permission.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_00: But that's what it means to be the exception to the rule, to be the one who moves first, to be the one moving and dancing before anyone else hears the music.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_00: And they're like, What is she, what is she doing?
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_00: But it's just because they can't hear the music.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_00: They don't hear what you and I hear.
• 5:21
  SPEAKER_00: They don't know.
• 5:21
  SPEAKER_00: And so this is the shift that's gonna make you the exception, right?
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_00: It's not the strategy, it's not the, you know, visuals, it's not the brain voice, not a formula.
• 5:28
  SPEAKER_00: It's you stop organizing your nervous system around being palatable and start regulating it to hold the truth of who you really are in all of your light and all of your bigness and all of you being a supernova and you're just bright, bright, bright, bright light.
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_00: And that shift makes the impossible inevitable.
• 5:44
  SPEAKER_00: You become the woman who says one thing and it echoes for like months and it ripples out.
• 5:48
  SPEAKER_00: I still have people come to me and say to me, the thing I said to them five years ago profoundly changed their life.
• 5:54
  SPEAKER_00: You become this presence that makes people rethink what is possible just by being in the room with you.
• 5:59
  SPEAKER_00: You become the one who's no longer trying to make it work because you already know it's working through you as you, because you're the one, because you're the supernova and you always have been.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_00: That's how you become the exception to every rule.
• 6:10
  SPEAKER_00: You stop living by the rules that were written for someone else less powerful than you.
• 6:15
  SPEAKER_00: And I don't mean less powerful in terms of, you know, one person has a capability of being more powerful than another.
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_00: We all have the capability of being more power, but from the person who decided to be powerful, for the person who decided to step into their power, for the person who decided they were gonna be the exception.
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_00: Power was never the problem, right?
• 6:31
  SPEAKER_00: It's just that your nervous system couldn't hold that much light yet.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_00: You are a supernova.
• 6:37
  SPEAKER_00: That woman's never been missing.
• 6:38
  SPEAKER_00: The star was never missing.
• 6:40
  SPEAKER_00: Your nervous system just wasn't ready to hold that much light, and now she is.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_00: So that fear of being too much, that instinct to explain, to cushion, to apologize, to sop in the blow, to not be so multidimensional, to not be, and now I was thinking about this.
• 6:56
  SPEAKER_00: The woman who's also like has really good physical health and has like good physique and also has a great relationship and also makes millions of dollars and also has this.
• 7:03
  SPEAKER_00: It's like, can I be that light?
• 7:07
  SPEAKER_00: Because it's actually easy for you, it's actually effortless for you.
• 7:11
  SPEAKER_00: And I was thinking about this recently.
• 7:12
  SPEAKER_00: I saw a reel and it was like uh something like you when you're running your own business and walking 10,000 steps a day and you're eating healthy and you're all this, and it was something about like it was hard or it was suffering.
• 7:28
  SPEAKER_00: But you do it with ease.
• 7:29
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, oh, what, like it's hard?
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_00: Because there's things like there are things that you do that are so easy that aren't easy for other people because that is your gift.
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_00: You are a supernova, you are meant to be that thing.
• 7:40
  SPEAKER_00: And when you dim that light and you don't allow yourself to be that big and to be the one who has it all, because yes, you're gonna trigger some people, but you don't get to reach the people you're gonna reach.
• 7:51
  SPEAKER_00: So I really want you to think about that, right?
• 7:54
  SPEAKER_00: It's how you survive being perceived in a power, like it's how you survive being perceived as powerful in a world that told you power makes people leave, power makes women lonely, and power makes other people feel small.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_00: But what if none of that was actually true?
• 8:09
  SPEAKER_00: Like, what if your true baseline is like bigness?
• 8:13
  SPEAKER_00: And I I use this analogy a lot with my clients, and it's the best way I feel like I can explain this really how it feels in the body.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_00: So if you're familiar with Harry Potter, I'm not sure which movie it is, but it's they're in Green Gods, and the dragon that was in Green Gods like breaks free and crashes to the top of Green Gods because like it's no longer chained, and it starts like and it starts breathing.
• 8:36
  SPEAKER_00: That's what it feels like.
• 8:37
  SPEAKER_00: It feels like you can finally breathe when you allow yourself to be like as big as you can, but trying to contain your light is actually so much more draining because it's already trying to burst out.
• 8:49
  SPEAKER_00: So, like, none of that is true.
• 8:51
  SPEAKER_00: Your true baseline is actually bigness.
• 8:53
  SPEAKER_00: Your true safety comes not from shrinking, but actually from being fully seen.
• 8:58
  SPEAKER_00: It feels like actual relief in your body.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_00: So, this is what it means to really like own your power and to be that exception, is that you stop cleaning up people's discomfort when they flinch at your light.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_00: You don't rush to feel the silence after you say something.
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_00: You let your I want more stand.
• 9:16
  SPEAKER_00: And you might be surrounded by people right now who are like, you have more than most people around you, and you're like, I still want more.
• 9:24
  SPEAKER_00: I don't even think about, you know, you might look at me, but live, like you're still working on your physique, but like you're, you know, all of this.
• 9:31
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, yeah, but I want to be able to do a muscle up.
• 9:34
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm gonna want more.
• 9:35
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I want more strength.
• 9:37
  SPEAKER_00: Right?
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_00: Can you allow yourself to want more and step into your bigness, even if no one else around you mirrors it back?
• 9:44
  SPEAKER_00: And this is also why I'm so passionate about mentorship and about spaces like this, because to have the space that actually allows you to be all that you are and to be the bigness of who you are, and it's not too much, is like the most delicious thing for your nervous system.
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_00: And you can fully am like, this is all of me, and I can be this big and I can be this rich, and I can be this fit, and I can be this happy, and I can be this joyful, and I can have these challenges going on, and actually I'm not suffering, and actually I'm doing this.
• 10:18
  SPEAKER_00: Ah, it feels so good.
• 10:19
  SPEAKER_00: So owning your power is like if no one claps, I'll still sing.
• 10:23
  SPEAKER_00: If they question me, I won't question myself.
• 10:25
  SPEAKER_00: If it makes them uncomfortable, I will not abandon who I came here to be.
• 10:30
  SPEAKER_00: And this is a cellular choice in your nervous system to stay rooted in your power, not give it away to somebody else.
• 10:36
  SPEAKER_00: Because right now, there's a part of you who knows that you are meant for more, who knows that you're meant to be a supernova.
• 10:41
  SPEAKER_00: Right?
• 10:42
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe she peeks out when you're journaling or in your visions or in like your your morning walk.
• 10:48
  SPEAKER_00: But right before you let her fully emerge, you interrupt her.
• 10:53
  SPEAKER_00: You just you take down the edge, you tone down that real edge, you make it a little bit digestible, a little bit more safe, you over-explain that thing that really needed silence.
• 11:02
  SPEAKER_00: You choose being liked over being true.
• 11:05
  SPEAKER_00: Because your body still associates bigness with danger.
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_00: Because let's be honest, at some point, people have flinched.
• 11:13
  SPEAKER_00: Someone flinched, someone left, someone punished you for the very light you came here to embody.
• 11:19
  SPEAKER_00: I can't.
• 11:19
  SPEAKER_00: That has happened to me dozens of times.
• 11:21
  SPEAKER_00: Dozens and dozens of times.
• 11:23
  SPEAKER_00: So that's why it feels like it's gonna be dangerous.
• 11:25
  SPEAKER_00: But then there's a moment where you realize that no one is coming to crown you, that you already are.
• 11:33
  SPEAKER_00: And you stop outsourcing validation, you stop seeking mirrors that only reflect a fragment of who you are, you stop pretending your light is some sort of liability, and instead you become the woman who walks into a room and recalibrates it, who allows herself to shine without dimming an ounce of it.
• 11:50
  SPEAKER_00: And when you allow yourself to be that lighthouse, people will flock to it.
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_00: People are looking for your light, right?
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_00: You become the one who creates the category, right?
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_00: Not just dominates the old one, but creates a whole category of her own.
• 12:02
  SPEAKER_00: You're a category queen, the one.
• 12:03
  SPEAKER_00: You become a place for other people to remember their power because you stand in your own.
• 12:08
  SPEAKER_00: That's how the exception lives.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_00: She doesn't make herself smaller so other people feel safe.
• 12:12
  SPEAKER_00: She doesn't need a blueprint because she is the blueprint.
• 12:14
  SPEAKER_00: And because of that, everything rearranges.
• 12:16
  SPEAKER_00: So the truth is that you're not afraid of being powerful.
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_00: You're afraid of what being powerful has caught you in the past because you've been addressed, you've been abandoned, you've been told you were too much and you've made people flinch.
• 12:26
  SPEAKER_00: So then your body started compensating and started diluting, overexplaining, and translating your magic.
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_00: You called it strategy.
• 12:33
  SPEAKER_00: And I I know this because I've done this.
• 12:35
  SPEAKER_00: But what it was is actually self-protection.
• 12:38
  SPEAKER_00: Because being the exception requires that regulated nervous system that doesn't collapse and people don't get you and they won't.
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_00: It requires that solid sense of safety in your own frequency and the capacity to hold that much power, that much light without apologizing for it.
• 12:52
  SPEAKER_00: So, you know, to wrap up this episode, I want to dive into like five signs you are dimming your light, which is keeping you from being the exception.
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_00: And so you can audit these for yourself.
• 13:02
  SPEAKER_00: Number one is you're waiting for instant approval before claiming the thing, right?
• 13:07
  SPEAKER_00: You say you want it, but then you're watching the room to see if it's allowed.
• 13:11
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 13:11
  SPEAKER_00: You kind of like hesitate.
• 13:13
  SPEAKER_00: You soften your claim if no one echoes it back.
• 13:15
  SPEAKER_00: It's like you, oh, you want this thing, but if no one's okay, you're like, oh, maybe maybe a little less.
• 13:21
  SPEAKER_00: Because what's happening in your body is that your nervous system is equating no response with loss of belonging.
• 13:26
  SPEAKER_00: So that silence feels like danger.
• 13:28
  SPEAKER_00: The second sign is you overexplain so it feels less confronting.
• 13:33
  SPEAKER_00: When the truth is, when your body, right, is still fearing that rejection, you'll soften that blow.
• 13:39
  SPEAKER_00: The woman who's the exception lets her truth land.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_00: Audit where you are overexplaining because you don't want to be that confronting.
• 13:46
  SPEAKER_00: Sign three is you second guess your desire the moment someone questions it.
• 13:50
  SPEAKER_00: You want maybe a luxury trip, a bigger house, a hundred K day, but someone flinches, and so you flinch, you downplay, you shrink.
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_00: You pretend you didn't really want it that much.
• 14:00
  SPEAKER_00: But the woman who's the exception doesn't edit her desire.
• 14:02
  SPEAKER_00: She amplifies it because she knows like her desire isn't her being greedy, it's source remembering itself through her.
• 14:11
  unknown: Right?
• 14:12
  SPEAKER_00: Sign number four, four, there we go, is that you keep yourself one step smaller than your full voice.
• 14:17
  SPEAKER_00: So it's just one step, one step smaller.
• 14:20
  SPEAKER_00: That's actually probably like the most expensive tax you are paying.
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_00: Because every time you keep it one step smaller, you don't say what you mean.
• 14:30
  SPEAKER_00: And the last sign I want to talk about is that you get quieter in the face of resistance.
• 14:34
  SPEAKER_00: So when things feel tense or intense, both tense or intense, you disappear.
• 14:42
  SPEAKER_00: That's collapse.
• 14:45
  SPEAKER_00: Being maybe like masked as pausing to reflect or waiting.
• 14:48
  SPEAKER_00: It's just you disguising that.
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_00: It's a self-sabotage.
• 14:52
  SPEAKER_00: The exception doesn't disappear.
• 14:53
  SPEAKER_00: She doesn't become louder, but she's cleaner.
• 14:55
  SPEAKER_00: So how does all of this really relate to being the woman who's the exception, the supernova?
• 15:01
  SPEAKER_00: The woman who's the exception to the rule, who's the supernova, doesn't have more luck, more talent, more strategy.
• 15:07
  SPEAKER_00: She simply has a high tolerance for being misunderstood.
• 15:10
  SPEAKER_00: So she doesn't collapse when she's not instantly mirrored.
• 15:14
  SPEAKER_00: She has high capacity for internal validation.
• 15:17
  SPEAKER_00: So she has an outsource worth to reaction.
• 15:19
  SPEAKER_00: And she has high regulation and expansion.
• 15:22
  SPEAKER_00: So she can hold success, tension, desire, power without fragmenting.
• 15:26
  SPEAKER_00: So I hope you guys enjoyed this episode.
• 15:28
  SPEAKER_00: If you haven't left a rating and review yet for the podcast, definitely do so below.
• 15:32
  SPEAKER_00: And I will see you guys in the next episode.