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The Spectrum Cafe' - We're Always Open · The Autistic Mile

• Untitled October 21, 2026 at 03.21.10: Welcome to another episode of the Autistic Mile. I'm your host, Jim Gaffney. I'm my way to the gym, been on an another kind of restless start to the evening. My mind got going with some some stuff that's been going on and some work that I've been doing, so as most people on the spectrum will attest to Autism is kind of twenty four seven. it's a diner that's always open. It's always always serving something. so instead of laying there sleepless in bed, I decide to head over to the gym. it's Wednesday morning, so gotta be up for work around five thirty or six, but Again it goes with the territory, the sleep patterns, yeah, the lack of sleep, restless brain. it's kind of a package deal, so and I was giving it a lot of thought to running. I'm not in the best shape in the world these days. I do run when I can. again I'm going to the gym this morning. they just had the Chicago Marathon on October eleventh. so it's been Just about almost two weeks now. I've run f five marathons, the last one being in Chicago in two thousand fifteen. So, I'm eleven years removed from having run that last marathon. Just something that whenever October runs around, I it gets me thinking about running more. Just you know, I've run out of the five marathons I've run. I've run Chicago three times. run Jacksonville once and also run the Disney marathon. and something I always been proud of, when I when I ran races, whether it was a marathon or or half marathon or shorter distance, I always finished a race. I never failed to finish a race and that was always important to me. that's kinda what this short episode's gonna be about. you know, why do we fall and what keeps us going? after we fall. you know, even though I don't run as much as I used to, you know, I've gotten excess of ten thousand miles on these legs, easy over over the course of my running career if you call it that. I ran night and day, you know, I ran weeks where I run seven days a week, I'd be out running all times a day. Now you can find me on the treadmill most of the time. you know, ten thousand miles takes its toll on your knees, your legs, your your feet. So most most of these most of these runs these days you you'll find me on the treadmill, as most people know. So But in the in this in the spirit of, you know, why we fall and what keeps us going, I think in particular for autism, those on the spectrum, and even families dealing with with autism, resilience is an important factor. you know, what keeps us going through those dark days, through the through what what seems to be never ending, you know, a lot of it's attitude. a lot of it is how we handle things and how we get through our day, and how we approach things. you know, whether you're autistic yourself or you have a family member that's autistic and you're helping them or you you know somebody that's autistic, a lot of it's about attitude. you know you find a you find quickly that some attitude will get you a long way. you gotta approach it positively as best you can. and that's what I've always tried to do. it's funny 'cause I got an email this evening from somebody s sent it to the Autistic Mile wanting to see if I would put something on on our website or or speak about something political with the midterms coming up and I deleted that email about as quick as I've ever deleted an email. 'cause I don't although I have strong beliefs I don't believe in ble being political. But on the in the in terms of being positive, you know, some of those things, some of the the factors that influence from day to day, whether it be political, social, they make it a lot more difficult to to be positive these days. you know, th there's a lot that we're bombarded with every day. We see things around us, we're you know, news, you know, things happening around us, there tends to be a lot of negativity, so even more important these days to to have a positive mental attitude and and approach things. you know, I always I always wanted to be the person, you know, they they talk about being the person, being the change in the world that you want to see. that's kinda how I approach things. you know, if I can make somebody else's day better, if I can make somebody else's day easier, if I could do something for somebody and go out of my way, I always find that I always find that more rewarding. know we can get bogged down with our own needs and our own desires and we have things that we need ourselves you know from other people every day but there's a lot to be said for giving and being giving of yourself, giving of your time. You know, when I ran marathons, when I when I ran in my racing career when I was running not professionally but when I was running vr you know, X number of races per year, and especially with the marathon, I you know, some people run one marathon, they wanna run the marathon just say you completed it. I never wanted to be the person that could just run a single marathon. I wanted to prove to myself that I could do it over and over again. The factor, the the quitting factor was always a big driving force for me. we all tell ourselves we're resilient. we tell ourselves we could do this, we could do that. but how many how often are we really tested? How long how often do we put ourselves to the test? so for me and my running career, that was me putting my my own self to the test to see if I could measure up to my own expectations. you know, would I be would I fold? Would I quit? you know, when it got difficult. until you until you actually take that upon yourself and and kinda prove that to yourself, it'll always be a question mark there. For me it was a question mark, it was a question I had to answer. and it this happened over course of you know, close to ten years. you know, I I've run hundreds of races, and you know, not of Not all of them are were my best race. you know, I've had some sat had some races I'd like to forget, but I never quit a single one and that always always meant a lot to me. but again, it goes back to my attitude and your how well you're mentally prepared for what you're dealing with. anyone will tell you running a marathon is not easy. Running the second one is definitely more difficult because your brain knows what it's been through. Your body knows what it's been through before and it will absolutely tell you it does not want to do it again. so you have to it takes more mental stamina to get through your second marathon, your third marathon, even your fifth than it did in in the first one 'cause you're you can trick your body in the first one 'cause it hasn't been through it before, it hasn't experienced it. once you get to the to those to those other marathons, you know, every every instinct that you have is is fighting against what you're trying to do. and if you can overcome that, it's a very rewarding experience. no matter how fast you run the race, you know, your your speed and your time is is subordinate to to the ultimate goal of finishing. you know, I've I've cle completed a half marathon under two hours, but I I was never able to break the The four hour barrier for the marathon. It was always I came up short in that department. it was always a goal to finish in under four hours. closest I came to that was four hours and sixteen minutes. so that's a little tough to handle because you think that's less than a minute, less than a minute per mile. If I had done it a little bit faster I could have been at four hours, but most people tell you and they run marathons, you know, that second the second half of the marathon will really really put you to the test. the first the first half is you know you're you're still you're still fresh after those after those first thirteen miles it's those second thirteen miles and change are gonna really they're gonna test you. I wish I had got gotten my four hours but just wasn't meant to be. So but I have no I have no regrets. you know, I finished every marathon, I gave it all my all. four of the five marathons I ran where I was injured in one shape or another with my foot or my or my legs. you know, so they were again, just adds to the pride factor afterwards being able to get through it. But again Running is the be one of the best metaphors in life, 'cause it can teach you a lot about yourself and it can teach you a lot about getting through life and how to how to do it positively. and again the the goal in with life is as with a race is to finish successfully, or to finish you know, you wanna be as as successful as possible. and one of the best ways we could do that is to to help others. you know. it's not always about money, it's not always about you know, some of the things that we that some of us really cling to and rightly so, you know, you wanna make a a decent salary, you wanna provide for your family, but from a a career standpoint you also wanna have something that's satisfying. working in ABA, working at Jacksonville School for Autism, I get to be part of an organization that that helps autistic children and families I've never had a a job that was that I quite felt this fulfilled. There's been other jobs I've been good at and I've excelled at and I've enjoyed them and I've made more money but I've never had a career like I do with JSA where where I truly enjoy what I do and and and how I'm able to to help help those around me. So so, you know, when we why do we fall? We f we fall 'cause we learn to get up. you know, you know, even even at my age, I still fall down sometimes, still gotta get up. you know, it's a little more of a challenge these days. but You gotta keep moving forward. You gotta keep you gotta put your best foot forward every day. you know, even those times where those days or those weeks where I don't feel at my best. you know, I try not to let it impact those around me too much. you know, I try to still put my best foot forward and be as helpful as possible and remember that you know there are people counting on me. so regardless of what's going on in my own life I have to kinda kinda com compartmentalize those things so so that the issues that I'm dealing with aren't spilling over into the other compartments and impacting my work, impacting the people I'm trying to help, you know, family, friends, clients, families, so so that's my message this morning. even at twelve forty in the morning. Try to stay positive. you know, if if if you get stuck, if you get at a point where you know you've you've gotta change up your routine, you know, if you gotta make better use of the time by not sitting in bed and going to the gym. it's better than sitting there tossing and turning and thinking of what could have been. so and God knows I haven't been to the gym as much as I like. So this is maybe this is God's way of telling me I gotta get get on the treadmill a little more and get going. Got Thanksgiving coming up so gotta start getting some of those pounds off so I can that turkey doesn't have so much of an impact with some of those holiday cookies. Alright, welcome back guys. finally got done running at the gym. Did about 90 minutes, so it's about 20 after two in the morning. so got good workout in for the day. head back home, probably do a little bit gotta be up in three hours, so not really by the time I get back to sleep, be time to wake up again. So I'll go home and do some work, get some stuff done. One of the things I wanted to talk about just in following up, you know, we talk about at least I talk about sleep regulation. you know, for a large part of my life, sleep is in my adulthood especially has been hard to come by. seems like the older I get the the more difficult that that becomes, getting a good night's sleep. So several years ago I started taking prescription sleep medication, just the over the counter stuff wasn't doing it for him anymore. So but medication in general something that we we don't focus on a lot with autism but a lot of folks they they benefit from from certain medications. for myself I I take medication aside from my sleep medication to kinda help regulate myself. I made a mistake Last week I was due for a refill on my prescription and and my doctor asked me for some some vitals to get back to her and I procrastinated a little bit. I was busy. by the time I got those back to her and she got my prescription sent in. they were out of my prescription. so I went almost a full week with without my medication, which was rough to say the least. put it in terms you might understand, I'll I'll do it from the opposite point of view. You know, if ladies if you if you have a if you have a date you go home with you think you're going home with Tom Cruise, you know, you wake up the next morning, you roll over and and lay in the bed next to you is Booger from Revenge of the Nerds. that's kinda how it is, you know, it's it's a that different. you know, it goes from from really good to ugly pretty fast. So it's I I never relied on maca any medication at all when I was younger. it wasn't just the last few years that I felt that I beside from the sleep medication I could benefit from from b some other medication to help re regulate me. and I've I've been taken that for several years now. So you know, there's a lot of medication out there for ADHD, for for sleep issues, and anxiety. I mean there's a ton of a ton of medication on the market. you know, and everybody has to decide what's best for them for to suit their own needs. But I was always kinda anti medication because you know, being a tough guy I am, I you know, I didn't need it. and then, you know, when I started taking medication I was I was really surprised at how what a big difference it made in my in my day to day life. So it's one of those things. If you feel like you need something, it's better off to seek a professional opinion about it. it's something it's something that that you can benefit from depending on the side effects and depending on how severe your needs are. I would advise anyone to at least at least check it out and then make a an informed decision after speaking with your doctor. you know you should never make these decisions in a vacuum. you know, just because I benefited from certain medication doesn't mean that somebody else is gonna get the same results. But don't deny that impulse. If you feel if you feel that that things are getting heavy, you know, that you're worn down, you know, you're not sleeping well, you have anxiety, you have some other issues possibly, seek medical medical attention, and talk to your doctor. It's it's something that even if you don't wind up pursuing it any further than that at least you've had the conversation. You've you can rest easier knowing that you've at least had that conversation. and then you can always if down the road if you if you change your mind you can always do that. But there's a lot of things out there. It's these days it seems like and I I hate to be one of the people standing in line you know at the pharmacy or at the drive thru because there's a lot of medications out there. You know, people are taking This, that, the other thing for everything. I'm not particularly fond of the fact that I am one of the people that relies on medication, but if I didn't think I needed it, I wouldn't take it. and like I said, the benefits have been have been outstanding for me. But it was a little bit of a rough week, I have to admit. from from the time that I took my last pill till till I got my prescription refilled yesterday, and even out I had to asked my doctor to send it to another pharmacy because my normal pharmacy was they had a shortage so just about a full week and I really did feel the impact of that, as I'm sure people around me did, my wife most particularly. she's she's the one that bears the brunt of the of the load when when I'm dysregulated and I'm having issues, you know, I I become very feisty, if you will. a lot of you know, things that normally would slide off a little bit easier. it seems like everything is amplified. and instead of being able to focus on the positive you know it's kind of insecurity sets in and I I tend to focus more on the negative and that's never a good thing. and that's another reason why you know this medication for me is so important because it does kind of level me out and it It really makes a big difference. you never wanna wake up to Booger from Revenge of the Nerds in the morning. you know, I try to I'll never be Tom Cruise, but I like to be closer to Tom Cruise than the guy from Revenge of the Nerds. I I don't like it to be that drastic. So, it was a little bit of a rough week, but having medication in hand now, back on schedule, I'll make sure that I don't procrastinate next time. It was on my own worse enemy sometimes, you know you think you got a a an extra day or two and all of a sudden you're you're on your last pill and you're like, great and then you're then you're running up against a shortage and you're you go almost a week without your medication, never a good thing. So always if you take a medication like that, always stay on top of it. unfortunately it's not something that I can call ahead and just have it, have an abundance of it. It's something that they that's very regulated and pretty much have to get it on the day that your prescription is is due to expire. So I don't have a lot of I don't have a lot of buffer. So I've gotta be mindful of that so so that we can keep Booger in his place you know from coming out. So but that's that's again it's all part of being positive. you know I even though I even though I was able to put on my game face and get things done I wasn't quite the man I wanna be at home this week. I was a little bit you know, I was a little bit difficult to manage as my wife will tell ya. but she's she's five foot five of toughness. you know, she was I I always believe she was truly the woman for me and you know, it's there's not a day goes by that I I couldn't I don't I don't think my lucky star is for her. She's you know, she really is my rock. even when I'm having good days. she's always supportive and you know, she's she knows how important my medication is and she knows how I get. So she knows she knows the drill. She's she's tried by fire. She's been trained, and she's to her credit she knows how to handle me as about as good as anybody can and she gives as good as she gets most of the time. She doesn't let me get away with too much. she'll she's the one person in this world who not afraid to stand toe to toe with me and and put me on my place. So I owe it to my wife Janine. she's a saint. But like I said, like to be positive, wanna keep it back on track on medication, keep it going. wanna get another podcast done in short order. We've had a few scheduling glitches with some of our some of our guests, so we gotta get back on schedule with our guests, and get get a few more episodes out. So our episodes have been a little sparse as of late. Shane's been keeping on top of his his weekly idealist offerings which are available on our channel. He's got his own he's got his own station on on Autistic Mile for the idealist. So keep up on those 'cause those are are worth are worth watching. he does a really good job and we'll talk to him about that a little bit this week when we have a regular podcast episode. that's it for me now. I'm gonna head home, get a little work done, shower up, go to work and hopefully we'll get a better night's sleep. No, tonight actually. It's early morning, so this evening, this coming evening, we'll we'll try to get a better night's sleep. So until next time guys, you take care and we'll see you next time on the Autistic Mile.