Latest / Banish the Lies: Outsmart Your Inner Critic / 51: Monday Moment: When Joy Feels Like a Betrayal
Transcript
- 0:00Happy Monday.
- 0:01Today actually feels like a happy day, but I'll be honest, the last few days haven't.
- 0:07Someone I care deeply about is going through a rough season, and as I've been sitting with my own pain around this, I've been trying to unpack what's underneath it.
- 0:17Part of it, of course, is that it's simply hard to watch someone you love suffer.
- 0:23But I think there's another layer.
- 0:25I think there's a lie underneath, and I believe the lie is that it's wrong for me to experience joy when someone I love is hurting.
- 0:36And as I sat with that, I realized that it goes even deeper.
- 0:41Somewhere inside me is this belief that if I stop carrying their hurt, maybe I've stopped being loving.
- 0:50Perhaps you've experienced something similar.
- 0:54It might be because someone close to you is struggling, or maybe you just turn on the news and look at the world and wonder how anyone can feel joyful with so much suffering around us.
- 1:06Whatever the reason, I've been trying to remind myself of something simple, that my joy doesn't take away from someone else's pain.
- 1:15It doesn't mean I've stopped caring.
- 1:17It doesn't mean I've stopped loving.
- 1:19It doesn't mean I'm callous.
- 1:21And in fact, allowing myself to experience joy puts me in a better place to hold space for their struggle.
- 1:29So today, I'm choosing to give myself permission to enjoy the day, to appreciate this coffee that's sitting in front of me right now, to notice the little gifts that life may offer, not because I'm not aware of the real pain of others, but because my joy can coexist alongside it.
- 1:48And if I have the opportunity to support someone who is struggling today, I'd rather do it from a heart that's been nourished than one that's been completely emptied.
- 1:58Maybe you'd like to give yourself the same permission today.
- 2:01Have a beautiful Monday.