Latest / I Choose Me with Jennie Garth / I Choose ... to Love Myself First with Gabrielle Carteris, Amanda Kloots and Gabby Reece

Transcript

I Choose ... to Love Myself First with Gabrielle Carteris, Amanda Kloots and Gabby Reece · I Choose Me with Jennie Garth

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: You're listening to I Choose Me with Jenny Girl.
• 0:08
  Speaker 2: Welcome back to I Choose Me, the podcast to where
• 0:11
  Speaker 2: incredible people inspire me every day. I had the absolute
• 0:17
  Speaker 2: pleasure of inviting some of those people onto the stage
• 0:20
  Speaker 2: for my second annual I Choose Me Empowerment Summit, was
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  Speaker 2: presented by iHeart and IT Cosmetics.
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  Speaker 3: The next three women are huge lives, huge experience those
• 0:32
  Speaker 3: things that we have been wanting to know, I think forever.
• 0:35
  Speaker 3: Gaby Reese, Amanda Klutes, and Gabrielle Carteris. Please help me
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  Speaker 3: and welcome these amazing women to the stage.
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  Speaker 1: Gabby, how short do you and I feel?
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  Speaker 4: Are?
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  Speaker 1: And thank you so much.
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  Speaker 2: I'm so happy you are here. I'm over the moon
• 1:06
  Speaker 2: that you are here.
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  Speaker 1: Look at these. Okay, for the sake of confusion, I'm
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: gonna call you.
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  Speaker 2: Gaby because that's how I've tall.
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  Speaker 1: That's how i've told you. That's your name for the
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  Speaker 1: last thirty.
• 1:22
  Speaker 2: Years that we've known each other. And I'm gonna call
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  Speaker 2: you Gabby because that's your name. Okay, you guys all
• 1:28
  Speaker 2: wore your shoes, so I'll keep mine on.
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: Okay, So Gabby, that's you.
• 1:34
  Speaker 2: I've heard you say that you don't judge.
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  Speaker 4: I'll quote you.
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  Speaker 1: I don't judge.
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  Speaker 2: I check to see if I can make myself feel differently.
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  Speaker 2: I will breathe, walk, or even give myself permission to
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  Speaker 2: be unreasonable. What do you mean by unreasonable? First of all,
• 1:57
  Speaker 2: like what can you get away with?
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  Speaker 4: I see that we live in a world where there's
• 2:02
  Speaker 4: a lot of internal chatter, and I think that's part
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  Speaker 4: of being a human being, that we have all our feelings.
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  Speaker 4: I mean, I have three daughters, work all kinds of things,
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  Speaker 4: like everybody here, and so I think it's I always
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  Speaker 4: say distance from stimulus and response, and so giving yourself
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  Speaker 4: that human and then saying, Okay, now what am I
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  Speaker 4: going to really do and how am I going to
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  Speaker 4: show up? Versus letting that control me or dictate how
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  Speaker 4: I react. So that's the unreasonable, Yeah, because I'm I
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  Speaker 4: don't want to live in that space, but I want
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  Speaker 4: to allow myself to feel all the feelings, even if
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  Speaker 4: it's like why are all these people in my house? Oh? Yeah,
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  Speaker 4: because I'm related to them? Do I have to make them,
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  Speaker 4: you know, dinner or what have you? But I'm trying
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  Speaker 4: to I call it the clean air. I just I'm
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  Speaker 4: trying to go up where there's less friction less turbulence.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, I love that. That's really important because there's luck
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  Speaker 2: going on all the time, all the time. Okay, I
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  Speaker 2: want to talk to you, Amanda, about the fact that
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: you said you find.
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: The ordinary moments the most meaningful.
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  Speaker 2: I want to know what was the most meaningful thing
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  Speaker 2: for you today so far?
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  Speaker 5: Today?
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  Speaker 6: Well, I have a little boy who's six and he's
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  Speaker 6: still sleep with me.
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  Speaker 2: Seriously, he's the cutest little kid you've ever seen in
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  Speaker 2: your entire life.
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  Speaker 6: Thank you, And he's just the cutest and we wake
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  Speaker 6: up together. And since he was a baby, he looks
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  Speaker 6: at me and he gives me this big smile, and
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  Speaker 6: today he was like, I love you, mom, I'm done.
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  Speaker 1: That's joy right there. That is it's it. It's all
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  Speaker 1: about ours.
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  Speaker 2: How if we don't have a cute old six year
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  Speaker 2: old to wake up next to, how can we find
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  Speaker 2: joy in the ordinary moments of life?
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  Speaker 4: Oh?
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  Speaker 6: You guys, it's to privilege to live.
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  Speaker 1: That's it.
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  Speaker 5: It's that easy.
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  Speaker 6: Just be grateful to be able to get out of bed,
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  Speaker 6: stand on two feet and walk to the bathroom to
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  Speaker 6: go pee.
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  Speaker 5: You're so lucky that.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, I know. I know when you lose people, you
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  Speaker 2: experience loss like that, everything falls into perspective. Your priorities
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  Speaker 2: just go change, cheat like they line up instantly, in
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  Speaker 2: an instant, I mean, my Just to give a little background,
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  Speaker 2: my husband was in the ICU for ninety five days.
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  Speaker 6: On his best day, he could lift his eyeballs up, down,
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  Speaker 6: left and right. He could not move any other part
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  Speaker 6: of his body. And I will never take for granted
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  Speaker 6: that I can do any thing with mine ever.
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  Speaker 5: Again.
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  Speaker 4: Well, those are tough lessons, right, okay.
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  Speaker 1: Yeab Luckily yeah follow that. Luckily the two of us.
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  Speaker 7: First of all, can I just say I absolutely agree
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  Speaker 7: with that. I really think that we need to live
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  Speaker 7: in the moment of our lives. And I think about
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  Speaker 7: and I pray on that, think about it when I
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  Speaker 7: wake up, and it's such a good reminder.
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  Speaker 4: It was so beautifully said.
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  Speaker 2: So Luckily, the two of us found forgiveness, you know,
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  Speaker 2: for the wonderful yet sometimes very challenging time on nine
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  Speaker 2: or two. And know what that we both experienced as
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  Speaker 2: young women. And I can't imagine my life without you
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  Speaker 2: and your friendship. So I'm so happy you're here.
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  Speaker 4: Thank you.
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  Speaker 2: So many people tried to pit all of us girls
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  Speaker 2: against each other right back in the nineties. But you
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  Speaker 2: know what, unfortunately that's still happening on sets these days.
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  Speaker 2: It's still happening in real life, not in this room.
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  Speaker 2: How important is it today for you to have strong
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  Speaker 2: female friendships?
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  Speaker 7: Oh my god, I could not be without my strong
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  Speaker 7: female friendships. I really, you know, that's all we have
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  Speaker 7: is each other. And I think this for men too.
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  Speaker 7: I have strong male friends and strong women friends. I
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  Speaker 7: think we lift each other up. Yeah, I mean, I
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  Speaker 7: am the best of who I am when it's not
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  Speaker 7: about me but about the people I care about it,
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  Speaker 7: And I think that we have so much to offer
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  Speaker 7: to each other. I really, I am reminded and I
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  Speaker 7: am humbled by the strength and beauty of my friendships.
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  Speaker 4: Absolutely.
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  Speaker 2: So, somebody does have the wrong idea about you, such
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  Speaker 2: as you know, we've experienced that. How do we choose
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  Speaker 2: to use our voices to better communicate when it seems
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  Speaker 2: like somebody has the wrong idea about us? Like, You're
• 7:02
  Speaker 2: really good at communicating, So I need you to.
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  Speaker 7: I really think it depends. Look at not everybody's going
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  Speaker 7: to like you. I mean, first of all, to come
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  Speaker 7: to peace with the fact that not everybody's going to
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  Speaker 7: like me.
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  Speaker 5: And that's okay.
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  Speaker 4: I mean it's so hard.
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  Speaker 2: It is hard, but want to be people pleaser like.
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  Speaker 2: That's what we're conditioned to do is make sure everybody.
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  Speaker 1: Like in my life.
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  Speaker 7: I still battle that, you know, Jen, I literally think
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  Speaker 7: about this all the time. I'm sure you know you
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  Speaker 7: guys wake up in the morning and you think about
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  Speaker 7: I know I'm not alone on this. I think about
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  Speaker 7: life and I think about am I people pleasing?
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  Speaker 5: Am I not?
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  Speaker 7: And sometimes I am people are not gonna all like me.
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  Speaker 7: And I came to peace with that very a long
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  Speaker 7: long time ago, that to live in my truth truly,
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  Speaker 7: I could at least then sleep in peace that when
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  Speaker 7: I sell myself short, when I'm always and there are
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  Speaker 7: times in my life.
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  Speaker 5: That I really like I need people to like me.
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  Speaker 5: I got to work.
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  Speaker 7: I want to make sure I work. I want to
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  Speaker 7: make sure that I get to have this part. I
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  Speaker 7: want to make sure that everything everybody around me. We're
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  Speaker 7: in a public life. I mean, I would that we
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  Speaker 7: could all get along. But you know, when I try
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  Speaker 7: to go and be what I think everybody wants me
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  Speaker 7: to be, I fail.
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  Speaker 5: I inevitably fail.
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  Speaker 7: And it feels it feels terrible. It's like that bad
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  Speaker 7: taste in the end of the day. It's like I
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  Speaker 7: didn't get to like myself.
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  Speaker 5: I tried so.
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  Speaker 7: Hard to have everybody like me that I did not
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  Speaker 7: end up liking myself. But I have to say there
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  Speaker 7: are things I've stood up for that people did not
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  Speaker 7: agree with, but I knew it was right. And in
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  Speaker 7: the end, I go to bed saying I did a
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  Speaker 7: good thing. I feel whole and it allows me to
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  Speaker 7: live in gratitude. It allows me to see the good.
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  Speaker 8: I know.
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  Speaker 7: It's hard, I know, but not everybody's gonna like us,
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  Speaker 7: and it has to be okay, you have to like
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  Speaker 7: yourself more, Gabby, have you always liked yourself?
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  Speaker 4: I mean, I was six feet at twelve six three
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  Speaker 4: six three at fifteen. Everyone I wasn't going like that
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  Speaker 4: is super cool.
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  Speaker 1: I think.
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  Speaker 4: I think on some level I came to terms with
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  Speaker 4: like figuring out who I was early, because just the
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  Speaker 4: physical separation of look of being different or whatever that means,
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  Speaker 4: because what you realize is we're all different, thank goodness,
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  Speaker 4: and so yes, I probably got through that lesson early.
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  Speaker 4: That doesn't mean you're not working on things that are
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  Speaker 4: tendencies to be better, to go against certain things that
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  Speaker 4: are in your nature that you go, I can do
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  Speaker 4: this better. But you can still do that with a
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  Speaker 4: pro productive kind of attitude of like I'm taking this
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  Speaker 4: on not because I'm beating myself up, because I'm I'm
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  Speaker 4: yearning to be better, and I think that I use
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  Speaker 4: that fuel source instead of the negative.
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  Speaker 2: Were you ever a people pleaser?
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  Speaker 5: People?
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  Speaker 4: Please? I don't think so. I don't. Well, I don't
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  Speaker 4: think that's my No.
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  Speaker 1: Oh, I love that about you.
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  Speaker 4: I think I like to consider people and be loving
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  Speaker 4: and kind. But also I think coming from sports, this
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  Speaker 4: is where I like masculine energy, where it's like, hey,
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  Speaker 4: I'm just laying down information and obviously you don't like it,
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  Speaker 4: and I'm sorry, but that's just kind of how it is.
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  Speaker 1: Okay, that is strength right there.
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  Speaker 4: Well, you can still do that in love, and I
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  Speaker 4: think men do that so beautifully. I won't say something
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  Speaker 4: really quick. My husband has taught me. I've been with
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  Speaker 4: my husband for thirty years and he's very direct, and
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  Speaker 4: he said to me one time, not saying something is
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  Speaker 4: not being loving. He says stuff to people and I'm
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  Speaker 4: always like, oh, I'm so uncomfortable, and he's like, that
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  Speaker 4: is being loving because it's honest communication. It's honest, it
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  Speaker 4: is kind, it is honest. So when he said that,
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  Speaker 4: I thought, well, I'd like to be kind, so I
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  Speaker 4: guess I'm going to be even more direct. Oh I
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  Speaker 4: love that.
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  Speaker 2: Okay, So Amanda, you're dating again?
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  Speaker 4: I'm sorry dating?
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  Speaker 1: You're dating?
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  Speaker 5: Yes?
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  Speaker 1: Are you dating?
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  Speaker 5: Okay?
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  Speaker 1: Does anyone know anyone's single.
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  Speaker 3: Here?
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  Speaker 5: Okay?
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  Speaker 2: It's you're doing it publicly, which is is hard. You
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  Speaker 2: lost your wonderful husband, Nick, and.
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  Speaker 1: I don't know how how did you know you were.
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  Speaker 2: Ready to date again? Like what were you thinking? Where
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  Speaker 2: was your where was your head around all that?
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  Speaker 6: Yeah, you know, in the beginning, I don't actually think
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  Speaker 6: I was ready. I thought I was. It was like
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  Speaker 6: a year after my husband passed away. I started just
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  Speaker 6: meeting other widowers out and that was like a nice
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  Speaker 6: safe space to start out with because I would sit
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  Speaker 6: across from a man who had my same story. The
• 11:53
  Speaker 6: problem was is that we would sit there and talk
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  Speaker 6: about our dead people, and.
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  Speaker 2: Then it doesn't exactly feel very romantic.
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  Speaker 9: But it was a great way to start, I will say,
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  Speaker 9: And every widower that I went on a date with
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  Speaker 9: We are still friends and we still call each other
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  Speaker 9: and help each other through this crazy.
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  Speaker 5: World of dating.
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  Speaker 6: But here's what I'll relate this to your audience, and
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  Speaker 6: this event I used to think dating again, I went
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  Speaker 6: out there thinking I have to please this person across
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  Speaker 6: from me.
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  Speaker 4: Am I pretty enough?
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  Speaker 5: Am I cute enough?
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  Speaker 4: Am I wearing a good outfit?
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  Speaker 1: Am I successiful enough?
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  Speaker 5: Am I do I have enough? To say? Are they
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  Speaker 5: gonna like me?
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  Speaker 6: And then, as I've been dating, I realized, no, no, no,
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  Speaker 6: I choose me. They're auditioning for me exactly like what
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  Speaker 6: am I?
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  Speaker 5: I'm amazing right?
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  Speaker 4: Like lover?
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  Speaker 1: Don't give away your power?
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  Speaker 6: My god, I learned so much about myself dating again.
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  Speaker 6: It was and it took me a while to understand that,
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  Speaker 6: and a lot of therapy to understand that. But once
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  Speaker 6: I understood that, it took so much pressure off.
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  Speaker 7: Yes, and so are the men that you're meeting as
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  Speaker 7: a result of saying I choose me and I'm great?
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  Speaker 5: Right?
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  Speaker 4: That?
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  Speaker 5: Are they different?
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  Speaker 1: Like a different caliber?
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  Speaker 7: Is it now a whole different kind of man that
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  Speaker 7: you're meeting because your approach is different?
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  Speaker 1: I wish I could say that.
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  Speaker 5: I thought was such a good idea.
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  Speaker 1: I mean, it.
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  Speaker 4: Should work that way.
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  Speaker 6: But you know what, I will also say that this
• 13:28
  Speaker 6: is a very recent, like aha moment for me. I've
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  Speaker 6: really like, it's been a journey, guys. It's been six
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  Speaker 6: years since I lost my husband in it. It has
• 13:38
  Speaker 6: been a journey and I've been on it and I
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  Speaker 6: will continue to go on this journey and heal.
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  Speaker 1: But healing is.
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  Speaker 6: So it's it's I posted something today on Instagram. It's violent,
• 13:53
  Speaker 6: and it is violent, and read my Instagram post today
• 13:56
  Speaker 6: and you'll understand what I'm saying.
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  Speaker 4: But it's a new.
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  Speaker 5: Thank you.
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  Speaker 6: It's a new appreciation for myself.
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  Speaker 5: So hopefully you will. I think it will come to differently.
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  Speaker 2: If you build it, they will come. Kevin Coster said, so, yeah,
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  Speaker 2: he's so cute. Everything he says is true. I'm this
• 14:16
  Speaker 2: Yellowstone ri ip. Okay, Gab, you've made the choice to
• 14:21
  Speaker 2: become a warrior basically for women in this industry.
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  Speaker 5: Come on, like a ex president, what's your or a lawyer?
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  Speaker 5: A warrior warrior? So you said a lawyer, I'm.
• 14:36
  Speaker 1: Like, I warry you and I are losing our hearing.
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  Speaker 2: That's great, It's okay.
• 14:41
  Speaker 7: What did you say?
• 14:42
  Speaker 4: Who are you a warrior?
• 14:43
  Speaker 5: You're what am I doing here?
• 14:45
  Speaker 1: No, you're a lawyer for actors, for actors. Why did
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: you feel called to do that? Not just actors?
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  Speaker 2: This woman is a warrior for every human being out there.
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  Speaker 1: It's such an advocate.
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  Speaker 4: The best.
• 14:59
  Speaker 2: What made you want to do that become the president
• 15:03
  Speaker 2: of sag AFTRA?
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  Speaker 7: It was not something I wanted? Okay, I don't thank you.
• 15:13
  Speaker 7: First of all, thank you. I'm always humbled, So thank you.
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  Speaker 7: I don't you know what I I So you're gonna
• 15:21
  Speaker 7: say I am a warrior?
• 15:22
  Speaker 5: You wait, wait, say it again?
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  Speaker 7: I have no I have a thing on here says
• 15:29
  Speaker 7: I am the storm. Did I ever tell you so?
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: Yes? I thought got a tattoo.
• 15:32
  Speaker 7: Fate whispers to the warrior, you cannot withstand the storm,
• 15:36
  Speaker 7: and the storm whispers back. I mean the warrior whispers back,
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  Speaker 7: I am the storm, right, So I have I am
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  Speaker 7: the storm and I got that when I became the
• 15:45
  Speaker 7: president of the union.
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  Speaker 6: Do you do it.
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: Because you needed like assurance?
• 15:50
  Speaker 7: I just needed a reminder like I believe in service.
• 15:54
  Speaker 7: I've believed in service since I was a child. I
• 15:56
  Speaker 7: think it's I think it's really important. I hope in
• 15:59
  Speaker 7: my girls that they see that we are the best
• 16:02
  Speaker 7: of who we are when we give to others.
• 16:04
  Speaker 5: That's so true.
• 16:06
  Speaker 7: I will come back to your question because I do
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  Speaker 7: think that we're all warriors because everybody is here has
• 16:13
  Speaker 7: survived something in their lives, and I think that the
• 16:16
  Speaker 7: best thing and one of the reasons I love what
• 16:18
  Speaker 7: you do, Jen, and I do listen to your podcast
• 16:21
  Speaker 7: and I.
• 16:21
  Speaker 4: Am reading her book.
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  Speaker 7: But I love I know where you got I choose me,
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  Speaker 7: But what I really love is the fact that you
• 16:28
  Speaker 7: are choosing you. I think we all need to choose ourselves,
• 16:33
  Speaker 7: and I think it's very easy to brush that by
• 16:38
  Speaker 7: and to admire it in Jenny is beautiful, but to
• 16:40
  Speaker 7: admire it in yourself is really outstanding.
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  Speaker 5: And that's right. So that's thank you so much, guys.
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  Speaker 2: For real, I gut shouting like that's part of my character,
• 17:00
  Speaker 2: but I'm going to do it anyway. Gabby, Gabby, Okay,
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  Speaker 2: you have said that everyone's an athlete, coming from one
• 17:07
  Speaker 2: of the best athletes of the world.
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  Speaker 5: What does that mean?
• 17:12
  Speaker 2: Does that mean I could be like you? I could
• 17:15
  Speaker 2: be like you?
• 17:16
  Speaker 4: Well only you know, listen, you're probably too smart to
• 17:18
  Speaker 4: be like me. So you know what I mean is
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  Speaker 4: we have we have a gift of your god given body,
• 17:26
  Speaker 4: whatever that is, tall, small, big, what you know, it
• 17:29
  Speaker 4: comes in all the packages. But your body is part
• 17:33
  Speaker 4: I always say it's the meat suit that houses the spirit,
• 17:36
  Speaker 4: the meats. And so how do you how do you
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  Speaker 4: just move so that there's space for the spirit to
• 17:44
  Speaker 4: come out? Because for me, it's not about befit and athletics.
• 17:46
  Speaker 4: Yes that is was part of my thing, but it
• 17:49
  Speaker 4: was having a relationship with the vessel so that there's
• 17:53
  Speaker 4: more room for the real essence, the real you, to
• 17:57
  Speaker 4: come out. And so we are all athletes. If that
• 17:59
  Speaker 4: means walking your dog, so be it.
• 18:02
  Speaker 5: But it doesn't mean it. I'm an athlete.
• 18:06
  Speaker 4: So we ignore this and we beat this up all
• 18:09
  Speaker 4: the time.
• 18:10
  Speaker 5: Why do we do that?
• 18:12
  Speaker 4: Well, it's biology. We won't get into all that now.
• 18:15
  Speaker 4: But it's to know that you're perfectly designed as you
• 18:18
  Speaker 4: are and how are you just the best version of
• 18:20
  Speaker 4: you and go with that versus I don't look like
• 18:25
  Speaker 4: you know her, I'm not small like that, I'm not
• 18:28
  Speaker 4: big like that. And just and using movement as a
• 18:32
  Speaker 4: practice to help you connect deeper with your with your spirit,
• 18:36
  Speaker 4: for me is I think important just to being a
• 18:38
  Speaker 4: human being and I'm one hundred and eighty pounds and
• 18:41
  Speaker 4: I'm six y three and that everyone goes, that's amazing,
• 18:45
  Speaker 4: But that's because I found a way to have a
• 18:47
  Speaker 4: relationship with that being amazing. And so once we are
• 18:51
  Speaker 4: like ourselves as fully as we and continue, That's the
• 18:55
  Speaker 4: cool thing about aging is that you you have the
• 18:59
  Speaker 4: opportunity to strip it all away, what you're told, how
• 19:02
  Speaker 4: you're supposed to be, and be who you really are.
• 19:06
  Speaker 4: And for me, there's real power in that.
• 19:07
  Speaker 8: And forget athletics, that's a very short period of your
• 19:11
  Speaker 8: life in a small part of If you go that route,
• 19:14
  Speaker 8: or an actor or mom, or a business person or
• 19:18
  Speaker 8: a woman or a man, it's like you're a human
• 19:20
  Speaker 8: being and you're.
• 19:21
  Speaker 4: How do you let the real heart of you expand
• 19:26
  Speaker 4: and come out? And that's why I like the idea
• 19:28
  Speaker 4: of strength because it can house that and I can
• 19:30
  Speaker 4: be more for more people.
• 19:32
  Speaker 5: So you can. You are one strong lady.
• 19:35
  Speaker 2: So the whole point of today is all of us
• 19:39
  Speaker 2: choosing ourselves, actively deciding to choose ourselves, put ourselves in
• 19:44
  Speaker 2: the mix in our list of priorities. So I want
• 19:47
  Speaker 2: to ask each of you really quickly. What is just
• 19:49
  Speaker 2: your one small way? Maybe it's you know, a ritual,
• 19:53
  Speaker 2: it's something you say to yourself every morning. What is
• 19:56
  Speaker 2: it that keeps you choosing yourself even when you don't
• 20:00
  Speaker 2: want to.
• 20:01
  Speaker 7: Yeah, you know what, every single First of all, I
• 20:04
  Speaker 7: wake up really early, so I wake up between six
• 20:06
  Speaker 7: and six thirty regardless, So I get up before usually
• 20:10
  Speaker 7: everybody else gets up. And that's I take the moment
• 20:13
  Speaker 7: in the morning to think about to be grateful, gratitude,
• 20:18
  Speaker 7: taking a moment to really say okay, like stop my
• 20:22
  Speaker 7: brain for a second and just be there.
• 20:24
  Speaker 5: That's one way I do it.
• 20:25
  Speaker 7: I go and I have a little coffee, I walk outside.
• 20:30
  Speaker 7: I really for me to sit and to listen to
• 20:33
  Speaker 7: the birds.
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, we're so old. I can't say we're old, but.
• 20:37
  Speaker 2: The birds, my god, it's my favorite thing.
• 20:40
  Speaker 7: And then in the early morning, you know what happens.
• 20:42
  Speaker 7: We have ducks that fly to our pool this time
• 20:44
  Speaker 7: of year. So to see the ducks, oh my god,
• 20:47
  Speaker 7: so great.
• 20:48
  Speaker 5: And then when I go on.
• 20:49
  Speaker 7: A walk before the world has woken up, it's quiet. Yeah,
• 20:53
  Speaker 7: and I think there it is, honest to God. If
• 20:56
  Speaker 7: I when I wake up and I take that moment.
• 21:00
  Speaker 7: That moment sets my whole day. And when I miss
• 21:03
  Speaker 7: that moment, I miss it and I have to remember
• 21:06
  Speaker 7: somewhere in the day to catch it. Yeah, because the
• 21:09
  Speaker 7: days go fast and you look at your busy and
• 21:11
  Speaker 7: you know, life happens and somebody needs something and suddenly
• 21:15
  Speaker 7: I'm doing the thing I have to get done or whatever.
• 21:17
  Speaker 7: But if I take that moment, the rest show up
• 21:20
  Speaker 7: better for every I show up better for myself. Yes, oh,
• 21:24
  Speaker 7: then I show up for everybody else.
• 21:26
  Speaker 6: How about you, Amanda, Mine is definitely moving my body.
• 21:30
  Speaker 6: I have to do it every day and it is
• 21:32
  Speaker 6: my I choose me moment. And guys that you know,
• 21:36
  Speaker 6: I performed on Broadway for sixteen years and I wore
• 21:40
  Speaker 6: costumes that were next to nothing moving my body.
• 21:43
  Speaker 5: Fitness always used to.
• 21:44
  Speaker 6: Be about being skinny, fitting into these costumes, looking good
• 21:47
  Speaker 6: on stage. And then I realized fitness is all about
• 21:51
  Speaker 6: mental health and all about anxiety and stress relief. And
• 21:55
  Speaker 6: when I move my body, this moves right, and that's
• 21:59
  Speaker 6: all that fitness is to me.
• 22:00
  Speaker 4: Now.
• 22:00
  Speaker 6: Also, I realize, through everything I've been through, it is
• 22:03
  Speaker 6: a privilege to be able to move. It is a
• 22:08
  Speaker 6: privilege to go to a workout class, to a gym,
• 22:11
  Speaker 6: to even go on a walk, and anytime I'm like,
• 22:15
  Speaker 6: oh God, it's a blessing.
• 22:18
  Speaker 5: And I do can I miss it today?
• 22:20
  Speaker 1: I don't want to know.
• 22:22
  Speaker 6: My leggings, I don't want to do this, I'll want
• 22:24
  Speaker 6: to do that.
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: And then I'm like, no, no.
• 22:25
  Speaker 5: No, no.
• 22:26
  Speaker 6: It is a privilege to move my body and it
• 22:29
  Speaker 6: and I always feel better after I work out or
• 22:31
  Speaker 6: move or do something.
• 22:32
  Speaker 1: So even a walk for me your day one hundred percent.
• 22:35
  Speaker 6: And there's so much research right now about how walking
• 22:38
  Speaker 6: is one of the best things we can do.
• 22:40
  Speaker 2: For your brain health. Yes, absolutely, Gabby, what do you
• 22:45
  Speaker 2: do well?
• 22:46
  Speaker 4: I won't be captain obvious and talk about my training.
• 22:49
  Speaker 4: I've always I have three daughters, I've always been very
• 22:52
  Speaker 4: ruthless about my training. But what I will say and
• 22:56
  Speaker 4: I won't I tend not to try to isolate between
• 22:59
  Speaker 4: mail and email, but I think for women I will
• 23:02
  Speaker 4: isolate and say the way that I choose me is
• 23:06
  Speaker 4: I am certainly going to be of service to my family,
• 23:09
  Speaker 4: to my partner, to my work. We're just going to
• 23:12
  Speaker 4: do that. So what I say is people don't realize
• 23:16
  Speaker 4: is I am so brutally selfish about what I need,
• 23:21
  Speaker 4: and so for me, it is the movement. And what
• 23:25
  Speaker 4: that does is it allows me to be much kinder
• 23:29
  Speaker 4: and much more loving. And it's because of the other side.
• 23:34
  Speaker 4: So I give my self permission to say I'm going
• 23:38
  Speaker 4: to take care of what I need. I'm not going
• 23:40
  Speaker 4: to expect the people and my husband or my kids
• 23:43
  Speaker 4: to go you know, you should probably go exercise. They're
• 23:46
  Speaker 4: never going to do that. So I think it's I
• 23:50
  Speaker 4: never felt guilty about being a brute. And I heard
• 23:55
  Speaker 4: a quote in a book called Natural Born Heroes which
• 23:59
  Speaker 4: was to be a true warrior, one must be compassionate.
• 24:04
  Speaker 4: And so it's also this notion of using loving kindness
• 24:09
  Speaker 4: as a fuel source and not fear, because that's a
• 24:13
  Speaker 4: hard and limiting fuel source. So that has really helped
• 24:17
  Speaker 4: me in the moments where I have a decision, Well,
• 24:20
  Speaker 4: if I choose me, then in this moment, I can
• 24:23
  Speaker 4: actually be loving and kind and the other person will
• 24:26
  Speaker 4: choose whatever they're choosing. But that doesn't I don't worry
• 24:30
  Speaker 4: about that. And to know that you'll be okay.
• 24:36
  Speaker 2: That's my favorite thing to say, You'll be okay. Everything's
• 24:39
  Speaker 2: going to be okay. You guys, we have survived the storm.
• 24:45
  Speaker 1: I couldn't have done it without you.
• 24:47
  Speaker 2: So powerful, I mean, I have loved every second of
• 24:50
  Speaker 2: this conversation.
• 24:51
  Speaker 1: Please give it up for these beautiful women. Thank you
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: so much, ladies,